Editing Tips: Watch Out For Tautology

I’m sorry friends, but “just google it” is no longer viable advice. What are we even telling people to do anymore, go try to google useful info and the first three pages are just ads for products that might be the exact opposite of what the person is trying to find but The Algorithm thinks the words are related enough? And if it’s not ads it’s just sponsored websites filled with listicles, just pages and pages of “TOP FIFTEEN [thing you googled] IMAGINED AS DISNEY PRINCESSES” like… what are we even doing anymore, google? I can no longer use you as shorthand for people doing real and actual helpful research on their own.

the dream thieves is the most perfect book ever because adam and gansey are going through a divorce, blue is breaking up with adam, ronan lets go of his crush on gansey in favor of perusing his para-religious devotion to adam full time, kavinsky is obsessed with having a threesome with gansey and ronan and sends gansey a dick pic from ronan’s phone, gansey starts dating blue behind adam's back the second they're freshly divorced and adam and blue have broken up, ronan turns kavinsky down and as a reaction to that kavinsky kidnaps ronans brother and then kills himself in front of their whole group. everyone is completely unfazed by this except for gansey who seems to care a little bit which adam thinks is cute. it's also in this book that the hitman who killed ronan’s dad starts hitting on blue’s mom. sound off in the comments if you know of any other ya books similar to this

why the net, kaz?

hi! I’m always looking for character design sheets/questionnaires to fill out for my characters, but I rarely find any I like. do you happen to have any suggestions?

Character Design Sheets/Questionnaires

(And My Alternative...)

While I think character design sheets/questionnaires can be fun to do, I also think they’re unnecessary and a bit of a time sink. After all, your character’s favorite kind of pizza won’t tell you much about who they are as a person, and probably doesn’t affect the plot at all.

In terms of fleshing out a character, I actually find it much more valuable to focus on the important things: Basic Biographical Details

Full Name: Nickname: Date of Birth: Gender: Description: Background Information Birthplace: Back Story: Current Residence: Occupation: Skills: Hobbies: Additional Details (If Applicable)

Aliases: Species: Powers: Crimes: Charges: Accomplices: Affiliation: Relationships

Parents: Siblings: Extended Family: Significant Other/s: Exes: Closest Friend: Friends: Coworkers: Classmates: Housemates:  Neighbors: Impact Traits

Positive Traits: Negative Traits: Emotional Wound: Internal Conflict: Pre-Story Life Goals: Pre-Story Life Goals Motivation: Story Goal/s Story Goal/s Motivation: Stakes: Voice: Arc:

Fun Details

Quirks & Mannerisms: Hopes & Dreams: Likes & Dislikes: Clothing Style: Pet Peeves: Those are most of the big ones I worry about. Ultimately, if it doesn’t impact the story, character development, or truly help you understand who this character is, it’s not really important.

I hope that helps! <3

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Have a question? My inbox is always open, but make sure to check my FAQ and post master lists first to see if I’ve already answered a similar question. :)

He fell quietly from her arms. He was a king.

i'm @ imjenndove on instagram! I post more regularly there<3

Can you hear your characters?

I have a whole lot of trouble making my dialogue sound natural if I don’t know what my characters sound like. Having a strong sense of their voice can help distinguish your characters from each other, show their personalities, and make them more engaging to readers. 

Here’s some details to think over if you’re trying to nail down a character’s voice:

Speed

Pitch

Volume

Accent

Vocabulary

Amount spoken

Willingness to speak

Stutters

Hesitations

Repetitions

Quirks 

Common phrases 

Other questions to ask:

Do their voices or the way they talk change depending on who they’re talking to or the situation they’re in? 

How can their personality come through their voice? Their sarcasm, empathy, awkwardness, etc. 

What in their backstory contributes to the way they talk? 

When they make a statement, how often does it come off as unsure or questioning, versus confident and factual? 

How does their voice relate or coexist with their body language? 

ᴛɪᴘꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀꜱ [ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴀ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀ]

don't let your skill in writing deter you. publishers look for the storyline, not always excellent writing. many of the greatest books came from mediocre writers—and also excellent and terrible ones.

keep writing even when it sucks. you don't know how to write this battle scene yet? skip ahead. write [battle scene here] and continue. in the end, you'll still have a book—and you can fill in the blanks later.

find your motivation. whether it's constantly updating That One Friend or posting your progress, motivation is key.

write everything down. everything. you had the perfect plot appear to you in a dream? scribble down everything you can remember as so as you can. I like to keep cue cards on my nightstand just in case.

play with words. titles, sentences, whatever. a lot of it will probably change either way, so this is the perfect opportunity to try out a new turn of phrase—or move along on one you're not quite sure clicks yet.

explain why, don't tell me. if something is the most beautiful thing a character's ever laid eyes on, describe it—don't just say "it's beautiful".

ask for critique. you will always be partial to your writing. getting others to read it will almost always provide feedback to help you write even better.

stick to the book—until they snap. write a character who is disciplined, courteous, and kind. make every interaction to reinforce the reader's view as such. but when they're left alone, when their closest friend betrays them, when the world falls to their feet...make them finally break.

magic. has. limits. there is no "infinite well" for everyone to draw from, nor "infinite spells" that have been discovered. magic has a price. magic has a limit. it takes a toll on the user—otherwise why can't they simply snap their fingers and make everything go their way?

read, read, read. reading is the source of inspiration.

first drafts suck. and that's putting it gently. ignoring all the typos, unfinished sentences, and blatant breaking of each and every grammar rules, there's still a lot of terrible. the point of drafts is to progress and make it better: it's the sketch beneath an oil painting. it's okay to say it's not great—but that won't mean the ideas and inspiration are not there. first drafts suck, and that's how you get better.

write every day. get into the habit—one sentence more, or one hundred pages, both will train you to improve.

more is the key to improvement. more writing, more reading, more feedback, and you can only get better. writing is a skill, not a talent, and it's something that grows with you.

follow the rules but also scrap them completely. as barbossa wisely says in PotC, "the code is more what you'd call 'guidelines' than actual rules". none of this is by the book, as ironic as that may be.

write for yourself. I cannot stress this enough. if what you do is not something you enjoy, it will only get harder. push yourself, but know your limits. know when you need to take a break, and when you need to try again. write for yourself, and you will put out your best work.

50 WORDS TO USE INSTEAD OF “SAID”

Do you ever find yourself over-using the word “said” in your writing? Try using these words/phrases instead:

stated

commented

declared

spoke

responded

voiced

noted

uttered

iterated

explained

remarked

acknowledged

mentioned

announced

shouted

expressed

articulated

exclaimed

proclaimed

whispered

babbled

observed

deadpanned

joked

hinted

informed

coaxed

offered

cried

affirmed

vocalized

laughed

ordered

suggested

admitted

verbalized

indicated

confirmed

apologized

muttered

proposed

chatted

lied

rambled

talked

pointed out

blurted out

chimed in

brought up

wondered aloud

(NOTE: Keep in mind that all of these words have slightly different meanings and are associated with different emotions/scenarios.)

How to Improve Your Dialogue

As an editor, one of the biggest problems I see in beginning fiction writers’ dialogue is a lack of conflict.

(Come to think of it, one of the biggest problems I see in general is a lack of conflict, but that’s another post.)

Good dialogue, like a good story, should be rich with conflict. There are exceptions – most notably in a story’s ending or in brief, interspersed moments when you want to slow down the pace. But as a general guideline, dialogue without conflict gets boring very quickly. Here’s a classic example:

“Hi,” Lisa said. “Hey,” José said. “How are you?” “Fine. You?” “Doing all right.” Lisa handed José a turkey sandwich. “Would you like a sandwich? I made two.” “Sure, thanks.”

Okay, that’s enough. I won’t continue to torture you. Not only is there no conflict between the two characters who are speaking, but there’s no conflict anywhere to be seen.

The bad news is that if you write something like this you will bore your reader to tears.

The good news is that there are lots of ways to add conflict to dialogue. Once you know how to do it, you can make just about any scene pop with tension.

Of course, you don’t want to add conflict just for the sake of conflict. Whatever conflict you choose should be relevant to the story as a whole, to the scene, and to the characters.

Here’s my first tip: Have your characters say “No” to each other

One of the easiest ways to give conflict to a scene like this is to have your characters say No to each other, metaphorically speaking. In other words, to push back against the first character instead of just agreeing with them and refuse to have the conversation on the terms that the other character is proposing.

This is sometimes called giving characters different scripts.

Doing this creates an immediate power struggle that not only creates a more interesting story but can be really fun to play with. Here’s an example of how this idea could improve the scene between Lisa, Jose, and the sandwich:

“Hi,” Lisa said. “You forgot the mustard,” José said. Lisa thrust the turkey sandwich across the counter. “I’m fine, thanks. How are you?” “I don’t want it.” “I already made two. You should’ve said something earlier.”

Did you catch all the “No”s in that dialogue? Here it is again with my notes:

“Hi,” Lisa said. [Lisa is offering a friendly exchange.] “You forgot the mustard,” José said. [José refuses the offer and changes the subject.] Lisa thrust the turkey sandwich across the counter. “I’m fine, thanks. How are you?” [Lisa refuses to change the subject to the mustard, offers the sandwich as-is, and – bonus points – answers a question that hasn’t been asked.] “I don’t want it.” [José refuses to take the sandwich that’s been offered. Interestingly, though, he doesn’t try to take the power back in the situation by offering a new proposal, so he opens himself to a power grab from Lisa.] “I already made two. You should’ve said something earlier.” [Lisa acknowledges what José has said, but refuses to give into him by, for example, offering to make him another sandwich, add the mustard, etc.]

A big improvement, right? Dialogue like this makes us lean in and ask: What’s happening? Why are Lisa and José so testy with each other? What’s going to happen next? Will they make up? Will they come to blows?

If a scene like this comes midway through a story, we might already know that José is mad at Lisa because she didn’t come to the opening of his play last Saturday, and that Lisa, let’s say, has a bad temper and a history of throwing punches at José, in which case the dialogue becomes a great example of subtext.

Instead of having Lisa and José talk directly about the issue at hand (also called on-the-nose dialogue), we watch how the tension surfaces in their everyday interactions.

We get to become observers – flies on the wall – to their dramatic experience. In classic terminology, we are shown and not told the story.

Another thing to notice about this example is the use of gesture to enhance the dialogue’s conflict. Notice how when Lisa thrusts the turkey sandwich across the counter, it gives us information about her emotional state and implies a tone for the rest of her lines that we can hear without having to resort to clunky devices like “Lisa said sarcastically,” “Lisa said bitterly,” etc.

I have a few more tips about how to add conflict to your dialogue, but I will save it for another post. Hope this helps!

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@theliteraryarchitect is a writing advice blog run by me, Bucket Siler, a writer and developmental editor. For more writing help, download my Free Resource Library for Fiction Writers, join my email list, or check out my book The Complete Guide to Self-Editing for Fiction Writers.

Vale, ¡es el tiempo de chisme! Tengo un novio :)

we’ve been dating for like 8 months but we’ve known each other for like 5 years as friends which I really like since we know we enjoy being around each other a lot!

we actually first became friends because we were both story people who liked talking about fandoms and such before we even knew fandoms were a thing. So pretty much every time we see each other we’re like “do you have any new story ideas?”

also he’s like one of the nicest most considerate people I know which is really nice :)

Funny story, we met just around when I was first thinking I might not be entirely straight and discovering the queer community. He was like “I’m straight but I support you!” and then we both discovered he was not actually straight which I think happens a lot to gay people

anyway this wasn’t actually very gossipy but it’s romantic so I’ll share it :D . I’m honestly really happy in our relationship! He’s super thoughtful and gives me cool gifts related to my fandom interests and has a really nice fashion sense. We had a little Valentine’s Day date which mostly involved going to the library and doing duolingo and eating chocolate strawberries and watching frozen 2. (oh another thing is I’m always like “have you done you duolingo??!?” every time we see each other because he somehow has a crazy high streak idk how he does it)

he is also very into making physical crafts too! He makes Halloween costumes every year and has this whole crafty corner with a leaf drying rack made of sticks and cloth and bottles of ink and flowers and it’s very pintrest esque

sorry this may have become Rosie rambles about their awesome boyfriend hours but I hope you enjoyed <3. Wishing you the best!

TIENES UN NOVIO?? VERDAD?? HELLO??? New Rosie lore!! This is so sweet my god. I'm so thrilled for you! You can't see it but imagine me doing lil claps rn, because that's what I'm doing. I am very much enjoying the rambles.

this may be the aromantic in me but friends to dating always just makes so much more sense to me than trying to start with a stranger romantically. of course no judgment to anyone who does that, i'm just a different kind of person. for exactly your same reasons!! you get to know them and you know you like spending time around each other. chef's kiss !!

and the mutual self-discovery!! my partner and I did a similar thing where we started as the lesbians of the friend group (neither of us ID'd as lesbians but it was a lil joke thing they called us because we were, at the time, two girls dating), then both went hey. not a girl. also aromantic. qpr time? qpr time. (this was over the course of several years). it's a level of mortifying ordeal of being known i hadn't experienced before

also that valentines date sounds so sweet. libraries and language and movies?? it sounds like you two are quite happy together, and i'm happy for you!! here's to much more sweetness to come <33