I Made A Character Sheet. Free To Use As You Wish, Feel Free To Change Whatever You Want XD Open Source

I want all the bats to wake up in a world where Jason never died and Tim never joined the family and it just…absolute chaos. I’m talking like, competent Lex Luther but it’s Tim Drake.

Idk how but he was still trained by Shiva (was going to visit his parents at a dig over holiday and took a wrong turn). And it’s not like he’s a villian. he’s an anti-hero. Morally grey at best. He never stopped with the night stalking, he just expanded it to more than the bats. He is *the* info broker of Gotham City. Nothing happens in his city without him knowing.

The key thing here is that Tim never adopted Bruce’s mission. And as a kid with too much money, too much time, and a penchant for being where he shouldn’t be, Tim grew into the most feral of gremlins.

I’m talking chaos for chaos sake. Pulling one pin out of a well crafted plan by either the bats or the rogues just to see it all fall apart and watch them rush to improvise on the spot. I’m talking blackmailing a boardroom of executives because they voted against creating a skatepark in a lower income area of the city (kids deserve safe places to play). I’m talking catching a wiff of the League of Assassins in his city, tracking down all info on them back to their main HQ finding out about Damian, and calling in Mama Shiva to do a two person wipe out of an entire base to abduct who Tim has officially claimed as his little brother (aka Damian).

And yes, Damian does eventually make it to Bruce, but not before Imprinting on Tim, which is how Tim *finally* gets dragged into the family. Because despite his general ruthlessness, he has not, and probably never will be able to, say no to Damian when he flashes his puppy eyes at him.

Bruce is exasperated. He doesn’t know how to fix this. Jason is kinda impressed. Dick is wallowing because where’d his cute baby brother go. Who is cleverly disguised, feral trash panda.

Meanwhile in the other room Damian and Tim are sitting together sharing a secret smile.

“How long do you think it will take them to realize we’re the same Damian and Tim from their dimension?”

“Depends on how good your acting is Drake.”

“Plsss. I give it 6 months.”

“A year,” Damian challenged. Because it was a challenge.

“Deal.” Tim agreed, because this time around he gets to be a bit more chaotic and also dote on his baby brother without the threat of being assassinated. Oh yes. The younger brothers are going to have fun with this one.

Alas Dick Grayson, you would love human by Christina Perri. Those crashouts would be legendary.

(click for better resolution)

Fanart for @caffeinatedflumadiddlebutpjo ‘s Son of Sea Foam AU! I love this fic and I can’t wait for the sequel. Fic link down below, for anyone interested:

A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad

Me: trying to do anything

My cat: 🥺

reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead

Ok, I shall report back soon

Me: wow. I feel really sick and terrible right now, I should watch my confort movie

My friends: BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN IS NOT A COMFORT MOVIE

Me, delusional: maybe it will be this time :D

Somehow Dick manages to actually lock Tim up in Arkham after Bruce “dies,” and it results in the longest period of no breakouts in Gotham history.

Don’t misunderstand. Tim’s not like standing at this revolving door of a prison entrance intimidating people into staying. He’s just being he’s weird self. He’s not Robin anymore after all, Damian took that mantle, but he’s still Timothy Drake and if you think this little twink of a boy with too much Information on everyone and to many random ass skill sets is not the most entertaining thing to show up in those halls then you are wrong.

Dude walks in with a suitcase half his size and wearing a pair of shades that cost more than the building housing him. He has a cell to himself that’s??? Fully furnished what the fuck? How did he get a laptop in here?

Someone approaches him in the canteen thinking they could extort or threaten him and Tim reflexively flips and pins them to the ground. He then sits in the guy and starts telling his captive audience about a cold case from 87 that he’s absolutely positive would be solved already if the police were competent in collecting evidence but also holy shit the uncle was so obviously guilty I can’t believe he somehow managed to get away with it.

Tim and Dent regularly hold mock trials. They’re not serious. Someone from the audience usually comes up with some random scenario and the two argue over it and site sources they have memorized and they go back and forth until there’s a vote by a preselected Jury.

Somehow Tim and Riddler started a “Pun-off.” That roped in like….half of the inmates. They had to cool it after someone got stabbed for a particularly bad pun though.

PowerPoint nights were implemented and the therapist thought it was a great idea because it allowed the patience an outlet for their obsessions. Most showed up because Tim was a bottomless well of cold case information and obscure conspiracy theories. This man has shown up every night with a new PowerPoint to present. No one talks about the number of note takers when he was presenting the PowerPoint on cloning.

People start showing up to group therapy on the off chance they’re in a group with Tim because there is something entertaining about listening to him dramatically wax poetic about how if he’d “ever felt the true touch of his mother’s love then he likely wouldn’t have spiraled down mentally when all his closest friends died so close together.

Once, Tim wanted Alaskan Crab so he ordered it and had enough shipped in for all the inmates and the staff. Hired a private chef to come in and cook it all too.

Meanwhile, in one on one therapy, Tim kinda just laughs with his appointed therapists about everything that’s going on. Talking about his friends does help, and playing up his intelligent eccentric billionaire is cathartic in a way Tim’s never really expected. “How sad is it that I’ve had more fun around these people than I have with my own family?” He asked one day.

Dick shows up one day to check on his baby brother because all he hears from Arkham is “Tim’s doing great!” Also he’s trying to check up on why there haven’t been any breakouts recently. When he’s brought to Tim’s cell he’s super confused. Again, this is a fully furnished Cell and Tim’s “smuggled” in a super computer essentially and what looked like a very expensive bed. There’s a shelf of books and a number of other electronics and oh? Are those WI financial records? Is Tim still running the company out of Arkham?

Anyway, Dick is checking in and Tim beams at him. “Dude, you basically sent me on Sabbatical! No fighting, no Damian or Jason! I don’t have to submit patrol reports. I’m not always bruised up from fights. No Damian or Jason! And when my fellow inmates aren’t being psychotic they’re entertaining as shit! I’m having more fun here than I have had in the last decade.”

And Dick doesn’t really know how to handle this, especially when Tim slips him a tablet and says. “By the way, I called in a favor with Slade (or other mercenary of your choice) since that Bitch owes me for that one stunt in the Caribbean, and had him check out some locations I thought Bruce might have left clues. Turns out I was right. Our cruddy father was in fact not dead and lost in the Time Stream. This tablet has everything you need to bring him back assuming you don’t think I’m still losing my sanity, which by the way, I’ve seen future selves where my sanity was lost and you better pray that never happens. Apparently the world burns. Killed that version of me already though, it’s somewhere in the YJ archives along with Gun Batman, Joker Batman, and Demon Head Tim. That last one is still possible though.”

“There’s at least two ninja’s here who have been tasked with keeping an eye on me on Ra’s behest. Wouldn’t put it past that man to abduct and try to brainwash me, but also if he tried Dent and Riddle would team up and systematically tear his organization a part to get me back. Apparently I’ve brought in enough intellectual stimulation and  entertainment that if anything happened to me they would ‘kill everyone involved and then Themselves.’ Their words not mine. I mean, I haven’t seen hide more tail of the Joker and wouldn’t be surprised if someone shot him dead in his cell to keep him from ruining our fun.” It was Tim actually. Figured he’d give patricide a go since all of his father/father figures keep dying. Figured he’d let Joker Junior complete the set.

“Anyway. Go save Bruce. When’s he’s back, tel him to come pick me up. Ask him if he’s proud that I’m following in his footsteps. Oooh tell him they stuck me in his old room I bet he’d love that!”

Dick end up leaving wondering if he somehow made a problem worse.

A month later Bruce shows up in a suit. Tim is drinking something out of a pineapple, sitting around a table with Dent, Nigma, and Harley playing a game of poker. Tim looks up, smiles, and asks if he wants to be delt in. Bruce sighs heavily but pulls up a chai, nods at the the other’s at the table and lets his son deal him into the game.

Somehow, Bruce is still surprised every time he learns that Tim is the most like him out of all his children.

God please, the world need to hear this

Please please please please please put paragraph breaks between each new line of dialogue. I physically cannot get through your fic if it’s all in one giant paragraph. And use commas, PLEASE.

Thus is amazing

(◡‿◡✿)

(ʘ‿ʘ✿) “what you say ‘bout me”

(ʘ‿ʘ)ノ✿ “hold my flower”