Good Afternoon Girl, I Am Being Harassed By Bot Accounts

me, looking at the villain who has gay vibes and the robot they made, both drawn by a queer animator: You’re telling me a queer coded this?

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you're welcome

Sero: I have some concerns

Kaminari: Take a number

Some responses for when someone asks your gender

“What’s a gender?”

“You can’t trick me into doing math!”

“And now I’ve thrown you off your rhythm!” (Courtesy of John Mulaney)

*just laugh*

“Oh! You got me good there!”

“wouldn’t you like to know weather boy?”

Kaminari: Dumbest question you’ve ever been asked?

Aizawa: If pikachu could get electrocuted

Kaminari: I see how it is

Kaminari: Someone just tried to pay me to charge their phone. They were like ”You’re Chargebolt right? I’ll give you 5 dollars to charge my phone” First of all it is nice to be recognized second of all sure.

btw the thing she couldn’t ignore was someone calling her out for saying anti-depressants/hormone therapy are only perscribed by lazy doctors

Peoples' desire to burn the Gävle goat isn't about them hating it. It's a "my son loved your drawing so much that he ate it" sort of a deal.

We’re hilarious you’re just a rat. Rats don’t get a sense of humour

do you ever laugh, or at least chuckle, at someone else's post but then you decide to say something cynical or cryptic to cover up the fact that you were somewhat entertained by someone other than yourself ??

tldr; ur a tsundere

You guys got weird assumptions about me - you guys make me smile, sometimes even chuckle, even GIGGLE sometimes. Sometimes.

Today’s Adventure is that I, after an unintentional 13-hour power nap,

Got woken up at 6AM by a phone call from a friend stranded in Montana because of the heat wave and almost no cell service because of their crap provider.

OhSoThat'sHowIt'sGonnaBe.jpg

Ok.

I somehow summon a week’s worth of spoons and in less than 30 minutes and 5 phone calls, get them

A hotel

An appointment with a mechanic from 2 states away

A perscription refilled from 2 states away

and A Pizza

Go me.

But then it’s 8AM and there are unscheduled live humans at the door and while EVERGENCY MODE is still on, I have already blown through a ton of spoons, and also probably shouldn’t meet whoever it is wearing just a pair of bootyshorts that say “CRYPTID” in Gothic Font on my ass.

So I greet them in those shorts and a T-shirt that I manage to put on both inside out and backwards

#nailedit

It is, Fortunately, not the mormons.

it is, Unfortunately, two UPS guys trying to deliver my other in-house friend’s new phone except the new guy doesn’t know how to operate the “sign for package” device, and the old guy that’s supposed to be mentoring him is like, 92, deaf as a post, and doesn’t actually know how to operate the device either.

by the way

it is already

over 100 out

it takes almost 30 minutes to sign for the phone

when i get back inside, i discover that apparently the Corgi has learned how to open his kennel from the inside because he is now out of the kennel and waiting for me to come in.

he also has cat litter all over his face because while he was waiting for me he also learned how to open the baby gate to the cat’s room and help himself to a cat shit breakfast.

He’ll be fine

He’s a cattle dog, they’re legally required to have at least 1 really disgusting snack they love.

but

more to the point

i have no idea at what point he learned to open his kennel from the inside

has he been staying there out of politeness this whole time??

And

I got other shit to do today.

namely.

I’m seeing a realator

The Devils most pathetic yet effective demons

I get a reminder text that I have an appointment with her

at least

I think that’s what it is because what she sends me is: “🏡⏰12:00 ❔”

With the time typed in the middle like that.

She is, according to her profile, at least 80.

so I reply “😎👍”

and then she sends me a string of GODDAMN POST-MODERN EMOJI HEIROGLYPHICS THAT TAKE UP MY ENTIRE SCREEN.

She’s on an iPhone so half of them don’t even translate across platforms

It takes me half an hour and three different software programs and goddamn wingdings to translate, but she has sent me the address and rules about masking and not wearing shoes inside.

in emoji

instead of like

literally any other format

I am

FASCINATED

and simply must meet the woman so if I don’t come back to update I got stolen by the fairies but I’m taking the Corgi with me as protection so I’ll see y'all later.