I Could Never Be A Protagonist Because I'd Just Never Move The Plot Along. "You Have Free Reign Of This

THROUGH A RAPIST’S EYES” (PLS TAKE TIME TO READ THIS. It may save a life, It may save your life.)

An Article from Neena Susan Thomas

“Through a rapist’s eyes. A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interview…ed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:

1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is grocery store parking lots.

5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three is public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.

POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:

1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.

2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.

FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ….

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping,eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side,put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:

a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB) .

b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.

c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.

If u have compassion reblog this post. ‘Helping hands are better than Praying Lips’ – give us your helping hand.

REBLOG THIS AND LET EVERY GIRL KNOW AT LEAST PEOPLE WILL KNOW WHATS GOING ON IN THIS WORLD. So please reblog this….Your one reblog can Help to spread this information.

THIS COULD ACTUALLY SAVE A LIFE.”

I'm blogging this cause this is genius

There’s a trope known as “What You Are In The Dark”, and it’s really useful for showing your audience what kind of person a character is.

It’s essentially where a character, usually- but not always- the protagonist, is in a uniquely tempting situation. They have the opportunity to do something they want to do, something that’s selfish and usually, objectively wrong. They WANT to do it on some level, it’s a benefit, and there won’t be any negative consequences for them. And the cherry on top: Nobody who’s opinion they care about will ever know what they’ve done.

Sometimes, it’s something like not saving someone who was horrible to you. Sometimes it’s a little more active, like an alter ego they can use to express their desires. But it’s always, metaphorically speaking, “in the dark”. Nobody sees, or anyone that sees doesn’t know it’s them, or nobody they care about sees and knows it’s them.

What the character does in that situation tells the audience who that character really is. What they’re like under any facades or pleasantries they may put up. What you are in the dark defines you. You are at your most YOU when nobody is looking.

Usually, if the character is a hero, they’ll throw away this opportunity. They’ll face the little voice whispering, “No one will ever know,” and tell it, “I’LL know.” Because they know whatever they have the chance to do is wrong, and they know they’d be torn up about it. Even with no external restrictions, there’s a little guiding force telling them to do good, or at the very least, NOT do evil.

If the character takes the opportunity to do something bad when no one is looking, they’re not a good person.

And yes, this trope CAN be invoked accidentally.

Happy International Women’s Day!

“The women we honor today teach us three very important lessons. One, that as women, we must stand up for ourselves. The second, as women, we must stand up for each other. And finally, as women, we must stand up for justice for all.” ― Michelle Obama

Ok, but is it just me who wonders, with this whole pandemic going on, are their some smart teens trapped in a maze trying to escape so they can find a cure?

*removes headphones to make sure random ass noise was part of the song and not psychosis*

MADD GUIDE

Please reblog so more people who need to see it get to see it :)

This may be MADD focused, but anyone having trouble with focusing and arranging their life, mental illness or not, can read and find this helpful!

Please skim through the different options that are color coded, but read through the normal text under the bold text questions :), they are important. Please read through this entire post, trust me you’ll need to see everything.

- what is MADD?

It’s an abbreviation for maladaptive daydreaming disorder! It is a coping mechanism many people have (usually developed during childhood but doesn’t have to be) causes by childhood stress, loneliness, and/or trauma. This leads them to daydream excessively to the point where they disassociate and lose track of time. There is no “official” cure for it, hell it’s not even recognized in the DMV, but professionals have heard and treated it before.

-…. so what do I do if I have it?

1. Realize it is out of your control to have this coping mechanism and, it doesn’t reflect on who you are. it reflects who or what did something that caused this to happen

2. Get professional help if you can! I know it’s embarrassing, but you don’t deserve to suffer silently purely because you are too ashamed of your daydreams. Therapists and psychologists are there to help you by understanding you, if you hear judgment from them then they aren’t a good mental health professional and you should get someone else!

-ok but??? I don’t see this as a problem??? Literally can’t live without it and it makes me feel great???

It makes you feel great because it’s a coping mechanism, but you don’t feel as great when you focus out of a conversation, when you miss work, and you miss events. It feels great in the short term, but it’s disastrous and stressful in the long term and makes those prioritize a imaginative life instead of your real life. It’s all fun and games until the procascination catches up to you and you feel so defeated and frustrated.

-….. so what if I’m young and/or I can’t get help?

There is a possibility that you can “cure” it by yourself and with nothing else, but please recognize if it’s caused by a deep rooted issue like it often is, you will not be able to fully get rid of it. MADD from my personal observations and professionals acts like a mask as those who often have MADD also have ADHD, depression, and or anxiety. This is why it’s hard for a lot to force themselves not to daydream, it often leads them to deal with those mental illnesses and disorders that are heavy.

Note: even with professional help, you may get it again due to whatever reason or continue to have it for a while, for a lot of people, it’s not completely gone from their life! But those who do have it and don’t have any professional help and those who do have and have professional help can definitely do the following suggestions bellow! ^^

There are however ways to cope with it (yes coping for a coping mechanism lol)

1. (Necessary) Self love, self care, self confidence- nobody really thinks about self care when they think of how to handle this coping mechanism, but it makes sense when you think it through. Daydreaming this much leads to losing track of time, it means you don’t have a schedule which also means you don’t have a time where you take care of yourself. This leads you to feel stress and overwhelmed by the amount of things you didn’t do, pushing yourself, daydreaming, and repeating a cycle where you neglect yourself and hate yourself and are more miserable. Self love is a journey you take by yourself, and you can get there a million different ways. It can be telling yourselves affirmations everyday, or wearing clothes that bring you joy so you feel good about yourself. This is an absolute necessary everyone needs in their life regardless of whether they have MADD or not.

2. Meditate!- many find meditation helpful, and it is! Meditation helps you be aware of your surroundings, therefore keeping you grounded therefore keeps your head from going up in the clouds! ⛅️

ALL OF HEADSPACE MEDITATIONS BUT U DIDNT HEAR IT FROM ME: https://href.li/?https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1sZ7Rev2ownSl-JlUn2VhE87RBwW9ZX9n

3. vision board!!- vision boards are a collage of photos which visually tell what you want achieved during the year, it is a great way to keep track of what you want and and remind you of what you really want and what your end goal is. You can either do a digital, or physical version, or both!

Digital how-to: https://youtu.be/kTYE3ZvXfXU OR https://youtu.be/TcXm7R3BUdU

Physical how-to: https://youtu.be/qXsYKpnBrF4 OR https://youtu.be/0TD48nEjd6U

4. Write a story or make a comic about your daydream!- tell your story! It doesn’t have to be your entire daydream timeline universe (idk what to call it) but you can make short stories or tell about one of the adventures your characters have gone on! This is a great way to invest in something productive instead of pacing around and daydreaming! You don’t have to be a good writer, but it is a good way of improving your writing skills which is always a helpful school (especially when writing high school or college essays)

5. (Highly suggested) clean yo room- I cannot explain how great it is to see your bedroom all nice and clean, that’s filled with furniture and items that are what you want and love seeing. In other words, clean and rearrange yo room. Some people like to have many bright things in their room, others literally have a closet rack which has their most worn items on it that they reach for. You can be both, you can be neither! The most essential thing is that you have a bedroom where you feel like you can breathe and you feel at peace in. Arrange your room to the best of your abilities, you may not be able to buy new furniture, but it doesn’t hurt to throw old items out and buy new ones, or fill with more things. A tidy room is a tidy mind!

6. Get artsy!- whenever I feel upset or like I daydream, I do art! You can draw, paint, sculpture, or all three and more! This is a great thing to use to channel negative emotions and make you focus. It’s very relaxing and really l it s your energy in soemthing productive! There are so many options you can do, you can find whatever is best for you! Arts and crafts is just as relaxing as painting to some!

Different ways to change up and arrange your room: https://chocolates-and-roses2.tumblr.com/post/642164018760581120/a-deep-room-cleanse

Marie kondo is also a great help in organizing your room! She makes sure you clean your room, and it forever stays that way! She has a series on netlfix as well as a book, you can choose either option though I think the book explains more.

- ORGANIZATION (not an option!)

Nobody (especially students) have gotten away with not writing down and memorizing everything that a teacher has said or that needs to get done. Especially MADDers (yes I’m calling y’all out 👀). Here’s a few options that you can try out, got certainly aren’t expected to do all.

1. BULLET JOURNAL BULLET JOURNAL BULLET JOURNAL- bullet journaling gives you complete control on how to organize your tasks, future events, and important things you need to write down etc… your bullet journal can be completely right down to the bone and simple, or more on the creative aspect. This option will definitely hold you a little bit more accountable considering it’s not all set up for you, you are the one setting it up.

more simple, down to the bone: https://youtu.be/fm15cmYU0IM

For the more creative and/or artsy ones: https://youtu.be/VQUH8VLE0YE

Note: you don’t have to do everything that the people in the videos above have done. Some people may need to put in calendars, others do not. Make sure you cut some things out if you need to to fit your life.

2. Agenda/planner- this is the same as a bullet journal, the only difference is that an agenda/planner has all the months and days laid out for you. It has already laid out everything for you and while some planners give you more content than others, they in general allow to write down events on the calendar provided for each month, write down the task u have for each day, and give you space to write down anything else you need on the sides. Some planners have broken each day down to an hour, so you can write down what you need to do in that time. These are available at your local Walmart and target and there’s tons of cute options :).

More creative way: https://youtu.be/OlDuxRmgWVY

More simple and clean: https://youtu.be/fRTaOqiTq9c

A whole ass system: https://youtu.be/NrVl9468Q_s

If you still don’t understand the difference, I’m sorry for not explaining well, and here’s a vid that explains it well! : https://youtu.be/zSVVdVFMc9E

3. TO DO APPS- these apps range from just the digital version of your average task sticky paper you put on your fridge, to turning your tasks into a whole-ass game which you can level up your character!

To do lists, but make it fun!: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.reviewgeek.com/2319/these-5-apps-turn-your-to-do-list-and-productivity-into-a-game/amp/

Good ol’ to do list (with neat features): https://zapier.com/blog/best-todo-list-apps/

4. Literally just Canva- Canva has templates that are daily planners, you can print it out with all the stuff you need typed out, maybe use it as a guide to whatever design you want on your journal, or print it out and write on it, you can do whatever.

Templates: https://www.canva.com/planners/templates/

5. Block scheduling- you literally turn living hour by hour to living block by block, this system makes you do certain tasks during each block, before focusing on other tasks, this is said to work for everyone, so try it out!

Blog that explains it with video: https://funcheaporfree.com/the-block-schedule-system-what-it-is-how-it-works-and-how-it-will-change-your-life/

There are probably many many many many more ways to organize your life and daily schedule, but I’ve already given you five that, as you go deeper, branch out into different versions, so this should be good enough to start at the very least.

-Help can’t focus while trying to do work and daydream instead :(

Ah yes, the age old issue for MADDers. I myself have trouble with focusing and when things get too stressful us MADDers bounce and just daydream instead. I don’t have many options for this but here are some:

1. FOREST APP- I love this app so much because you set a timer to how long you want to do something, and if you can actually go through with the whole time and not scroll on your phone or daydream, it plants a tree irl! There’s also a non free version of it which I would say: if you got a couple of dollars get the 1.99 one (I think it’s that much)

2. Fidget toys- great way to keep your hands busy while you do your work!

3. Apps that make you set timers and not look at other apps- pretty self explanatory, they are great apps.

https://www.mothermag.com/screen-time-limit-apps/- apps that set limit

4. Take a break???? (Essential, not an option)- You are not a robot, you are a human being with complex emotions and you need love and care just as any other human being does

Other options that are in the first section can also help with focusing, not just these three (but really 2) options ^^

-I literally feel like poop because I am so behind on work and what if I don’t follow through everyday on these different things and let my sadness and MADD get the best of me?

As I mentioned earlier, you are not a robot, you are a human being that needs attention and love. That is why self care is so important and must be in your schedule and in ur fricking life, you need to take care of yourself mentally (self care) and physically (working out, can literally be just jogging). Some days you will not get things you need to get done. Some days you will have mental breakdowns and have nothing done. We are human, we are not perfect. Take a breather and forgive yourself. It is not your fault you have this, but you are much more than MADD and you will accomplish more than this thing is letting you. MADD will never, control you. You control it. Take a deep breath and remember, I would not be typing this so late at night if I didn’t give a damn about any of you. Take dare of yourselves and come back and read this whenever you need to.

With love,

Rose.

my last polaroid of 2020