Any Adhd Kids Out There That Loved Long (3+ Hour) Car Rides Because It Gave You An Acceptable Excuse

“The ones who notice the storm in your eyes, the silence in your voice and the heaviness in your heart are the ones you need to let in.”

— Steve Maraboli

If someone falls overboard on a cruise ship, and there is a life preserver on the wall next to you, you throw them the life preserver.

Yes, it would be great if the ship had better railings so no one fell overboard to begin with. Yes, it would be awesome if everyone knew how to swim well enough to save themselves even in such a wild event as falling off a ship, but that's not a standard thing that's taught most places right now.

Yes, it probably is a good idea to know how to swim before you go on a ship, but even if you know how to swim, the act of falling into the water can startle anyone into panicking, so you don't really have time to ask them if they can swim or not before they need the life preserver. Yes, being careful around the railings is a good idea, but you have no way to know right now whether they were doing it for the Vine or someone just tried to murder them, and either way do you actually think they deserve to die for not being 100% careful 24/7?

No, you should not be expected to jump in and try to rescue them yourself when you aren't trained and don't know them, but that's not what anyone's asking you to do. They just want you to grab the life preserver off the wall and throw it towards them, or even to just hand it to someone who can aim well if you're worried about being held responsible if you miss, or hell, you can just get out of the way so someone else can grab it off the wall.

Don't deprive someone of help right now just because in your ideal world, they wouldn't need it. People asking for accommodations within the current system aren't trying to uphold it, they are trying to survive and improve their lives, so don't deny them those because in the system you want to have in place they wouldn't need that accommodation.

Don't deprive someone of help right now just because you're morally inclined to believe they "deserved it". You don't know anyone else's situation, you can never have full context, and quite often, the time and effort it takes to pass judgement on someone's worthiness is more burden on everyone than just giving them the help. And even if you earnestly feel you don't want to help them, why would you stop someone else from doing it? After all, even if your excuse is "to keep them from helping someone who doesn't deserve it", you felt the first person got what they deserved, so why would you think the person trying to help them doesn't deserve any results too?

Put down your swim class brochure and either grab the life preserver or get out of the way so someone else can.

This honestly deserves a whole post but it requires reliving some... past memories soo I'll probably post that later

MADD GUIDE

Please reblog so more people who need to see it get to see it :)

This may be MADD focused, but anyone having trouble with focusing and arranging their life, mental illness or not, can read and find this helpful!

Please skim through the different options that are color coded, but read through the normal text under the bold text questions :), they are important. Please read through this entire post, trust me you’ll need to see everything.

- what is MADD?

It’s an abbreviation for maladaptive daydreaming disorder! It is a coping mechanism many people have (usually developed during childhood but doesn’t have to be) causes by childhood stress, loneliness, and/or trauma. This leads them to daydream excessively to the point where they disassociate and lose track of time. There is no “official” cure for it, hell it’s not even recognized in the DMV, but professionals have heard and treated it before.

-…. so what do I do if I have it?

1. Realize it is out of your control to have this coping mechanism and, it doesn’t reflect on who you are. it reflects who or what did something that caused this to happen

2. Get professional help if you can! I know it’s embarrassing, but you don’t deserve to suffer silently purely because you are too ashamed of your daydreams. Therapists and psychologists are there to help you by understanding you, if you hear judgment from them then they aren’t a good mental health professional and you should get someone else!

-ok but??? I don’t see this as a problem??? Literally can’t live without it and it makes me feel great???

It makes you feel great because it’s a coping mechanism, but you don’t feel as great when you focus out of a conversation, when you miss work, and you miss events. It feels great in the short term, but it’s disastrous and stressful in the long term and makes those prioritize a imaginative life instead of your real life. It’s all fun and games until the procascination catches up to you and you feel so defeated and frustrated.

-….. so what if I’m young and/or I can’t get help?

There is a possibility that you can “cure” it by yourself and with nothing else, but please recognize if it’s caused by a deep rooted issue like it often is, you will not be able to fully get rid of it. MADD from my personal observations and professionals acts like a mask as those who often have MADD also have ADHD, depression, and or anxiety. This is why it’s hard for a lot to force themselves not to daydream, it often leads them to deal with those mental illnesses and disorders that are heavy.

Note: even with professional help, you may get it again due to whatever reason or continue to have it for a while, for a lot of people, it’s not completely gone from their life! But those who do have it and don’t have any professional help and those who do have and have professional help can definitely do the following suggestions bellow! ^^

There are however ways to cope with it (yes coping for a coping mechanism lol)

1. (Necessary) Self love, self care, self confidence- nobody really thinks about self care when they think of how to handle this coping mechanism, but it makes sense when you think it through. Daydreaming this much leads to losing track of time, it means you don’t have a schedule which also means you don’t have a time where you take care of yourself. This leads you to feel stress and overwhelmed by the amount of things you didn’t do, pushing yourself, daydreaming, and repeating a cycle where you neglect yourself and hate yourself and are more miserable. Self love is a journey you take by yourself, and you can get there a million different ways. It can be telling yourselves affirmations everyday, or wearing clothes that bring you joy so you feel good about yourself. This is an absolute necessary everyone needs in their life regardless of whether they have MADD or not.

2. Meditate!- many find meditation helpful, and it is! Meditation helps you be aware of your surroundings, therefore keeping you grounded therefore keeps your head from going up in the clouds! ⛅️

ALL OF HEADSPACE MEDITATIONS BUT U DIDNT HEAR IT FROM ME: https://href.li/?https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1sZ7Rev2ownSl-JlUn2VhE87RBwW9ZX9n

3. vision board!!- vision boards are a collage of photos which visually tell what you want achieved during the year, it is a great way to keep track of what you want and and remind you of what you really want and what your end goal is. You can either do a digital, or physical version, or both!

Digital how-to: https://youtu.be/kTYE3ZvXfXU OR https://youtu.be/TcXm7R3BUdU

Physical how-to: https://youtu.be/qXsYKpnBrF4 OR https://youtu.be/0TD48nEjd6U

4. Write a story or make a comic about your daydream!- tell your story! It doesn’t have to be your entire daydream timeline universe (idk what to call it) but you can make short stories or tell about one of the adventures your characters have gone on! This is a great way to invest in something productive instead of pacing around and daydreaming! You don’t have to be a good writer, but it is a good way of improving your writing skills which is always a helpful school (especially when writing high school or college essays)

5. (Highly suggested) clean yo room- I cannot explain how great it is to see your bedroom all nice and clean, that’s filled with furniture and items that are what you want and love seeing. In other words, clean and rearrange yo room. Some people like to have many bright things in their room, others literally have a closet rack which has their most worn items on it that they reach for. You can be both, you can be neither! The most essential thing is that you have a bedroom where you feel like you can breathe and you feel at peace in. Arrange your room to the best of your abilities, you may not be able to buy new furniture, but it doesn’t hurt to throw old items out and buy new ones, or fill with more things. A tidy room is a tidy mind!

6. Get artsy!- whenever I feel upset or like I daydream, I do art! You can draw, paint, sculpture, or all three and more! This is a great thing to use to channel negative emotions and make you focus. It’s very relaxing and really l it s your energy in soemthing productive! There are so many options you can do, you can find whatever is best for you! Arts and crafts is just as relaxing as painting to some!

Different ways to change up and arrange your room: https://chocolates-and-roses2.tumblr.com/post/642164018760581120/a-deep-room-cleanse

Marie kondo is also a great help in organizing your room! She makes sure you clean your room, and it forever stays that way! She has a series on netlfix as well as a book, you can choose either option though I think the book explains more.

- ORGANIZATION (not an option!)

Nobody (especially students) have gotten away with not writing down and memorizing everything that a teacher has said or that needs to get done. Especially MADDers (yes I’m calling y’all out 👀). Here’s a few options that you can try out, got certainly aren’t expected to do all.

1. BULLET JOURNAL BULLET JOURNAL BULLET JOURNAL- bullet journaling gives you complete control on how to organize your tasks, future events, and important things you need to write down etc… your bullet journal can be completely right down to the bone and simple, or more on the creative aspect. This option will definitely hold you a little bit more accountable considering it’s not all set up for you, you are the one setting it up.

more simple, down to the bone: https://youtu.be/fm15cmYU0IM

For the more creative and/or artsy ones: https://youtu.be/VQUH8VLE0YE

Note: you don’t have to do everything that the people in the videos above have done. Some people may need to put in calendars, others do not. Make sure you cut some things out if you need to to fit your life.

2. Agenda/planner- this is the same as a bullet journal, the only difference is that an agenda/planner has all the months and days laid out for you. It has already laid out everything for you and while some planners give you more content than others, they in general allow to write down events on the calendar provided for each month, write down the task u have for each day, and give you space to write down anything else you need on the sides. Some planners have broken each day down to an hour, so you can write down what you need to do in that time. These are available at your local Walmart and target and there’s tons of cute options :).

More creative way: https://youtu.be/OlDuxRmgWVY

More simple and clean: https://youtu.be/fRTaOqiTq9c

A whole ass system: https://youtu.be/NrVl9468Q_s

If you still don’t understand the difference, I’m sorry for not explaining well, and here’s a vid that explains it well! : https://youtu.be/zSVVdVFMc9E

3. TO DO APPS- these apps range from just the digital version of your average task sticky paper you put on your fridge, to turning your tasks into a whole-ass game which you can level up your character!

To do lists, but make it fun!: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.reviewgeek.com/2319/these-5-apps-turn-your-to-do-list-and-productivity-into-a-game/amp/

Good ol’ to do list (with neat features): https://zapier.com/blog/best-todo-list-apps/

4. Literally just Canva- Canva has templates that are daily planners, you can print it out with all the stuff you need typed out, maybe use it as a guide to whatever design you want on your journal, or print it out and write on it, you can do whatever.

Templates: https://www.canva.com/planners/templates/

5. Block scheduling- you literally turn living hour by hour to living block by block, this system makes you do certain tasks during each block, before focusing on other tasks, this is said to work for everyone, so try it out!

Blog that explains it with video: https://funcheaporfree.com/the-block-schedule-system-what-it-is-how-it-works-and-how-it-will-change-your-life/

There are probably many many many many more ways to organize your life and daily schedule, but I’ve already given you five that, as you go deeper, branch out into different versions, so this should be good enough to start at the very least.

-Help can’t focus while trying to do work and daydream instead :(

Ah yes, the age old issue for MADDers. I myself have trouble with focusing and when things get too stressful us MADDers bounce and just daydream instead. I don’t have many options for this but here are some:

1. FOREST APP- I love this app so much because you set a timer to how long you want to do something, and if you can actually go through with the whole time and not scroll on your phone or daydream, it plants a tree irl! There’s also a non free version of it which I would say: if you got a couple of dollars get the 1.99 one (I think it’s that much)

2. Fidget toys- great way to keep your hands busy while you do your work!

3. Apps that make you set timers and not look at other apps- pretty self explanatory, they are great apps.

https://www.mothermag.com/screen-time-limit-apps/- apps that set limit

4. Take a break???? (Essential, not an option)- You are not a robot, you are a human being with complex emotions and you need love and care just as any other human being does

Other options that are in the first section can also help with focusing, not just these three (but really 2) options ^^

-I literally feel like poop because I am so behind on work and what if I don’t follow through everyday on these different things and let my sadness and MADD get the best of me?

As I mentioned earlier, you are not a robot, you are a human being that needs attention and love. That is why self care is so important and must be in your schedule and in ur fricking life, you need to take care of yourself mentally (self care) and physically (working out, can literally be just jogging). Some days you will not get things you need to get done. Some days you will have mental breakdowns and have nothing done. We are human, we are not perfect. Take a breather and forgive yourself. It is not your fault you have this, but you are much more than MADD and you will accomplish more than this thing is letting you. MADD will never, control you. You control it. Take a deep breath and remember, I would not be typing this so late at night if I didn’t give a damn about any of you. Take dare of yourselves and come back and read this whenever you need to.

With love,

Rose.

inspired by this post

🐧 he thinks I'm a penguin????🤣💀

Your fifth most recent emoji is what your soulmate thinks about you

You can insult me, but insult my Hogwarts house and it gets personal

Spoiler warning

TL;DR horrible adaptation, but very enjoyable on it’s own

(Also just wanted to say I was so sure I was going to hate this bc of what’s different but they changed so much the cartoon and the live action are barely connected in my head)

Okay my review will be split up into two parts: fate: the winx saga as an adaptation and as a standalone work

As an adaptation:

0/10. Maybe 0.5 if I’m being generous.

The things that were unchanged from winx club:

There are characters named Bloom, Stella, Musa, Aisha, Sky and Riven

Aisha, Bloom, Stella and Sky resemble their cartoon counterparts

Riven is an asshole

Bloom is a dumbass

Magic exists

The specialists exist

Main characters go to schools for magic and specialists respectively

The dragon flame is a thing

Witches exist

Other than that it’s a completely different show. The plot vaguely resembles season 1 of winx club only in that Bloom is trying to discover her true heritage. Musa, who is supposed to of East Asian descent is not, Flora was not included and in her place is a different character with similar powers, Tecna was excluded entirely ( I believe this was to distance the show from the futuristic elements of winx club and focus only on fantasy, which doesn’t make sense since they changed Musa’s powers ).

The magic system was changed. Fairies don’t on the regular transform since in the show the know-how to do so was lost, though Bloom does unlock the ability in the finale. Instead of each being a fairy of an individual concept, everyone’s powers ale element based, with Musa’s powers being changed to her being an empath. While this does feel more generic, it makes more sense from a world building perspective and I can see why they changed it.

The fashion is horrible. You will never be able to convince me teenagers dress like that. One of the reasons the original cartoon was enjoyable was all the colourful, fun clothing. The clothes feel dated and too mature for the characters, like I can see a twenty-something person in 2013 wear some of those outfits. It especially feels like a missed opportunity since 2000’s fashion is coming back into style.

The characterization of some of the characters compared to winx club was hit and miss. Riven was an ass and Bloom was impulsive and naive, which is accurate, but Stella, oh Stella was a disappointment. Stella was a jealous, manipulative bitch, which in context of her character backstory makes sense, but is so far from her original portrayal. Cartoon Stella was spoiled and at times self centered, but she was also genuinely kind, helpful and bubbly. To see her character take a 180 and become the all too familiar jealous ex archetype was upsetting.

Now, aaaaall that being said, I don’t believe we should judge this as an adaptation. They changed so much that it is quite literally a new story. So let’s see how it stands up on it’s own.

Summary, taken from the wiki

The series tells the story of Alfea, a fictional boarding school where teenagers study. The world inside this universe is not only magical and full of monsters, but it is also a world of real teenagers who do the most common things: make friends and enemies, go out and of course... fall in love. They are eager to find their place in this world. This universe is different from the one we have all known for a long time.

The attention is focused on a group of proud teens, also well-designed female characters. Sometimes they are heroines, sometimes weak girls. Sometimes they are friends, sometimes rivals. Of course, they are not perfect, but they are real. A group of girls who did not know each other until they are included in the same team inside a school that is strange to them. They will meet forces that are beyond their control and things they do not understand. But, throughout the series, they will find themselves, form an indestructible bond, and transform into powerful and strong girls, ready to change not only the supernatural world, but also ours.

Character summary:

Bloom is a newly discovered fairy from the human world who is attending Alfea college in the otherworld. There she meets her new roommates: chatty Terra, athletic Aisha, uptight Stella and stand-offish Musa. She also meets Sky, Stella’s ex, who is training as a specialist.Shortly before coming to Alfea, Bloom discovers she has magic powers by almost burning her house down and killing her parents. She is distraught over this and it is why she is eager to gain control of her powers.It is discovered that Bloom is a changeling, a barbaric practice where a fairy baby is exchanged with a human one. This leads Bloom on a quest to discover her true heritage.

Musa is an empath, she can feel the feelings of everyone around her. To shut them out and escape she listens to music through her headphones. This leads to her initially coming off as uncaring when Terra tries to get to know her better.

Terra is an earth fairy with a particular talent for making plants grow. She is very nice and chatty, eager to make friends, but not afraid to stand up for herself. She struggles with finding someone to like her and compares herself to “cool girl” Beatrix who has boys following after her.

Aisha is a water fairy who swims twice a day every day. She comes off a a good person who wants to make friends and do the right thing. She also tries to do everything in her power to protect her friends.

Stella is a light fairy and princess of Solaria, the realm in which Alfea resides. She is repeating her first year due to an event prior to season one where she lost control of her powers and blinded her best friend. She is very uptight due to her perfectionist mother and tries to exert control in every other area of her life, when this doesn’t work, e.g. when someone flirts with her on-again-off-again boyfriend she gets jealous and causes trouble. She is also generally rude to the people around her.

Sky is a specialist legacy and Stella’s on-again-off-again boyfriend who has an interest in Bloom. His father was a famous specialist and he was raised by his father’s best friend.

Riven is Sky’s roommate, best friend and a genuine asshole. He insults and antagonizes everyone around him and gets involved with Beatrix. He seems dissatisfied with the life of a specialist.

Beatrix is an air fairy with a lightning powers. She seems mysterious and looks to be the villain of the season. She has enlisted the help of Riven and Dane.

Dane is a first year specialist who first seems to be friendly with Terra but gets sidetracked after spending time with Riven and Beatrix.

What I didn’t like:

The world building is sparse and the magic system is generic. I feel like things could have been better expanded upon. Throughout the show they bring up archaic fairy magic but it’s never really explained how that’s different from current fairy magic.

The interactions between Riven and Dane come off as a bit queerbait-y although they could be setting things up for a second season.

Everyone is constantly so rude towards Terra. Even her supposed friends are mean to her. What gives?

Stella was constantly rude to everyone but by the end they are all the best of friends when she really hasn’t changed much. Also Stella being the jealous controlling ex archetype and not enough people calling her out on her bullshit.

What I did like:

For a Netflix teen drama there is surprisingly little sex between the teenagers. This might be subjective but it was refreshing for me.

Again subjective but I could definitely relate to Bloom’s antisocial teen flashbacks

Beatrix was a fun villain

Though the story might be a little generic, I felt it was compelling throughout. I genuinely wanted to know what happened next.

The story was well paced. It never felt like anything was dragging along

Overall:

The show was definitely enjoyable to watch. There is a lot of room for improvement. It sometimes felt like different plot lines were unconnected and the costume choices leave a lot to be desired. Aside from that they set up a solid story and likable characters (some of whom I love love and love to hate) which I very much want to see further developed in the future. As a stand-alone work 6/10