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What to do if you meet a toxic “professional”

I met a shit doctor today. They shamed me and blamed me for my illness, treated me like a drug addict for needing anti depressants, refused to give me enough to last til next appointment… Made us cry, gave me a panic attack and shamed me for being an adult with special needs and dependent on my parents. Aggressively gave bad information. I will be reporting them to the psychiatry board, but in the meantime, I want to tell people what I learned.

If someone makes you uncomfortable, professional or not, tell them and if they continue just leave! You can walk away!

You don’t owe anyone apologies for who you are or for having an illness

Read online reviews before seeing someone, check for red flags. I wish I had! They had similar experiences! Almost exactly the same.

If someone constantly interrupts you when it’s your turn to talk, they are out of line.

I’m a trauma survivor. It’s hard for me to say no. You can say no. You don’t have to sign things against your will.

Take a friend or family member who will have your back.

Please don’t give up hope on finding treatment from a bad experience, try again when you are ready.

Prepare some phrases if you need help to walk away. “I don’t think we are a good match, I will be leaving now.” Is more than acceptable.

In hindsight, I could have called the police or someone, don’t be afraid to step out and do that. Especially if they hurt you physically, that’s assault!

I hope this helps someone.

“and the universe said…”

there are people in this world you haven’t even met yet who are going to love you so much, so please just hold on because the people who are right for you will find you

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there’s comfort in the grasses and trees. nothing is ever as good on the heart as the way the winds and flowers are. every day the dirt is calling, this is home. this is home. this is home. don’t be afraid to get dirty.

good things to pay attention to more often

the color of trees

clouds and how they look different throughout the day

the different colors the mornings can have. sometimes it's an orange hue and sometimes pink and sometimes it's too misty to tell

pretty color schemes in random places (the trees and your neighbors wooden patio and the color of their car)

the states of the vehicles passing you by, dents and scratches and the different trinkets suspended from their rearview mirrors

the sound of silence

the shadows the lights cast in your home, like how sunset looks different than sunrise, and the shadows the sun casts look different than those of your lamps and candles

pretty details in buildings and houses like certain types of windows or doorknobs or archways

the movement of things in the wind. flags, leaves, flowers, people's hair and coats

“Part of maintaining your energy is limiting other people’s access to it” - carajojo // isuperbloom.com

If you lost your teenage years to mental illness and/or trauma, I just want you to know that you did not "miss out on the best years of your life" and that it isn't actually too late for you to have fun, explore yourself and grow into the person you want to be. There's still plenty of time for all of that. I promise.