Chapel Neumann, Bavarian Forest

Art Nouveau architecture of a house built in the 1880s in Brussels, Belgium

the thing is that childhood doesn't just end when you turn 18 or when you turn 21. it's going to end dozens of times over. your childhood pet will die. actors you loved in movies you watched as a kid will die. your grandparents will die, and then your parents will die. it's going to end dozens and dozens of times and all you can do is let it. all you can do is stand in the middle of the grocery store and stare at freezers full of microwave pizza because you've suddenly been seized by the memory of what it felt like to have a pizza party on the last day of school before summer break. which is another ending in and of itself

Costume. Chitons.

Coping 101 - a masterpost of down to earth resources

This post doesn’t contain links to many professional resources - it’s a list of coping tips from people who are mentally ill/disabled themselves and who all decided to share what has worked for them here on tumblr. In the last 7 months I have been sharing content created for and by mentally ill/disabled people on this blog - and to celebrate reaching 5000 followers, I have decided to collect all the best coping tips I’ve come across in one easily accessible place. Enjoy!

Managing emotions:

Letting go of emotional suffering via mindfulness.

DBT strengthening statements

Handling negative emotions

The “emotions are signals” method

The “mindfully recognizing emotions” method

Healthy perspectives on emotions

The “emotions are like hiccups” method

The “healthy outlets” method

Managing anxiety:

Coping statements for anxiety.

Breathing exercise gif

Breathing exercise gif 2

Things to remember when having an anxiety attack

The “just show up” method

The “panicky friend” method

Grounding techniques 

The “I can survive the next 10 seconds” method

The “distract your brain” method

The “you will be able to cope” method

Managing depression:

7 depression tips and why they work

Depression tips

21 tips to keeping your shit together when you’re depressed

Managing executive dysfunction:

The “might as well” method.

The “one step access” method.

Why self-discipline isn’t always the answer. 

The “use whatever works” method.

The “taking care of someone else” method.

The “june-bugging” method.

Tricks for pushing through executive dysfunction

The “do several things at once” method

The “accept your limits” methods

The “turn it into a game” method

The “anything worth doing is worth doing poorly” method

The “tricking your brain” method

The “untangling the spaghetti” method.

The “smaller steps” method

The “emergency cleaning” method

The “letting go of should” method.

The “my body is an animal I need to care about” method

The “fork theory” method

The “remove the barriers” method

The “half-ass things” method

Managing negative thinking:

Challenging cognitive distortions.

Finding alternative thoughts.

Challenging negative thoughts

How to get over past mistakes

Toxic positivity vs hope and validation

How to improve your self-esteem

Negative and positive cognitions

The “self neutrality” method

The “separate your negative qualities from your identity” method

Self talk to help end obsessions

Ten forms of twisted thinking + ten ways to untwist your thinking

Managing self care:

How to practice balanced self care.

Why hands-on hobbies are important

Ways to self-soothe

A list of mental illness workbooks 

Ways to start feeling again

How to get back on track after a breakdown

How to self-soothe and treat yourself

Types of healthy coping skills

The “parenting yourself” method

An interactive self care guide

The “don’t ignore your needs” method

Online self care

Making the most of therapy

Free worksheets for people who can’t access therapy

The “add good things to your life” method

Showering for spoonies

The “do what you can” method

The “it isn’t a waste of time just because it won’t cure you” method.

Self care cheat sheet

The “create something” method

Managing school:

Studying with anxiety and depression

Studying with mental illness

Coping with dissociation in school

Managing exam periods when you’re mentally ill

The “done is better than none” method

How to survive college

Managing urges to harm yourself:

What to do to when you’re suicidal

Questions to ask before giving up

Alternatives to self harm

Coping with suicidal thoughts

Jour de brume

Popular Hades & Persephone "retellings" are, rightly, getting dunked on all over the socials right now and, as a Pagan who has an altar to the Queen, I could not be happier. But also, I feel like a lot of people miss WHY they're bad - aside from just plain bad writing and lazy tropes. Which are, yeah, also REALLY bad.

Pretty much all retellings try to wave away, or excuse, or twist the whole kidnapping bit. And I actually do have sympathy and understanding for why, when speaking from a modern perspective.

But honestly...you gotta get over it. There are other stories to play fix-it with, not this one.

The Abduction is The Thing.

Were I a little more sober I could bring up chapter and verse of the Hymn to Demeter but frankly, if you know even the middle school mythology curriculum version of the story, you SHOULD know the themes. The story of Persephone was one mothers and daughters in the ancient world held dear, because it was a reality: you will, one day, be swept away from your home to go cleave to a man you most likely know nothing about. You will miss your mother, but chances are very good that he will be a good husband, once you get to know him, certainly better than Zeus or Ares, and he will make you a queen of his home.

Leaving home to marry was often scary, and violent (look up the history of the tradition of Bridesmaids, if you don't already know it - they were originally decoys on the marriage road). Centuries later we'd have tales like Beauty & The Beast serving the same function: comfort, hope, you are leaving your safe loving home to figure life out with a (often older, powerful) stranger. Your trauma over this sudden ending of your childhood made manifest in a Beast, or a God of The Underworld.

It's wonderful that we don't NEED stories like this anymore to comfort us (here, at least, in this culture). But if you try to force them into modern vernacular it just will not work, not really, because you're gutting out the whole point just to have a more tidy romantic male hero.

I have read MANY very good ...novelizations? fanfic(? however you would frame them, but they're certainly not "retellings"), etc. that simply take advantage of the blank spaces in the myth, and there are many!

It's not explicit that sexual assault happens - "The Rape of Persephone" as a title was coined in much earlier eras, when the word was just as often used to simply refer to abduction.

"She was starving!" the gods didn't need to eat. So it's easy to read her eating the Pom seeds as a deliberate choice on her part. Like, shit, people, scholars have written whole papers on the symbolism of this moment, between marriage rites and even yeah, Seph choosing both worlds with her husband's knowing consent.

And that, I think, is the real heart of the thing. People want an utterly mundane, spelled-out story here, as opposed to what it really is, has always been, just like any other myth or religious parable: IT'S A METAPHOOOOOOR.

They don't need to be destined, or meet at a goddamned BALL and then CONSPIRE to fake her kidnapping, or shit, I once saw one where Hades got MIND CONTROLLED by Zeus?! Jesus.

Persephone was yoinked into the Underworld against her will.

That's how it went.

I don't mean this in a "stay out of my belief system!" way, shit I'm a white American chick with delusions of witchery. I mean this in a "stop stressing yourself out trying to make things palatable" way:

This is a very real, very precious myth to many people, BECAUSE for at least that one event, Persephone had no autonomy, BECAUSE for thousands of years most women had no autonomy. Erasing that, sanitizing the fact that a girl is ripped out of the spring, from her mother's arms, is erasing the thing that gave comfort to women for centuries. And people can and should still find power and healing in it now!

Fill in the blanks the story leaves in whatever manner seems fit to you, there's plenty of room, but. Come the fuck on.

Goofy in “For Whom the Bulls Toil” from 1953

A few years ago, when I was living in the housing co-op and looking for a quick cookie recipe, I came across a blog post for something called “Norwegian Christmas butter squares.” I’d never found anything like it before: it created rich, buttery and chewy cookies, like a vastly superior version of the holiday sugar cookies I’d eaten growing up. About a year ago I went looking for the recipe again, and failed to find it. The blog had been taken down, and it sent me into momentary panic. 

Luckily, I remembered enough to find it on the Wayback Machine, and quickly copied it into a file that I’ve saved ever since. I probably make these cookies about once a month, and they last about five days around my voracious husband - they’re fantastic with a cup of bitter coffee or tea. I’m skeptical that there is something distinctively Norwegian about these cookies, but they do seem like the perfect thing to eat on a cold day. 

Norwegian Christmas Butter Squares

1 cup unsalted butter, softened

1 egg 1 cup sugar 2 cups flour 1 tsp vanilla ½ tsp salt Turbinado/ Raw Sugar for dusting

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Chill a 9x13″ baking pan in the freezer. Do not grease the pan.

Using a mixer, blend the butter, egg, sugar, and salt together until it is creamy.  Add the flour and vanilla and mix using your hands until the mixture holds together in large clumps. If it seems overly soft, add a little extra flour. 

Using your hands, press the dough out onto the chilled and ungreased baking sheet until it is even and ¼ inch thick.  Dust the top of the cookies evenly with raw sugar.

Bake at 400 degrees until the edges turn a golden brown, about 12-15 minutes. Remove from the oven. Let cool for about five minutes before cutting the cooked dough into squares. Remove the squares from the warm pan using a spatula.

by Dmitriy Shustikov