Why Is There Not An Ice Cream Delivery Service?

“She forgot her knife that morning.” Some things come out pretty fucking ominous when I narrate my day.

This ant and I are the same level of smooth.

Always unsure. [Via @nathanwpyle]

Not being able to afford your drugs is a hell of a drug.

"Pretty pretty rainbow!" -Me "YOU'RE a pretty pretty rainbow!" -My S.O.

The truth will s̶e̶t̶ y̶o̶u̶ f̶r̶e̶e̶.̶ make you uncomfortable; it's still the truth.

Revenge Utopia

Where diurnals have to keep the noise level down during the day so nocturnals can get some friggin sleep.

Where the housed have a sunset curfew to keep the houseless safe.

Where various public servants are treated "like servants."

Where it's widely considered weird and gross to force someone to eat in a bathroom - including infants.

Where being attracted to someone regardless of their genitals is the default you see depicted, and not liking someone because of their genitalia is something you're fine with, you just don't want it influencing the children.

Where the common myth is that gay or het exists only as a phase before they grow out of liking one gender.

Where Duck Dynasty was cancelled after one season, and Firefly was renewed for ten.

Where the phrase "but they're your family" emphasizes how fucked up something is, not how much more "forgivable."

Monogamy never works out. I have a friend who tried a monogamous relationship, and they broke up.

Just because people don't like a thing doesn't mean they're snobs who are shaming others for liking the thing. Let people not like things.

Getting a hard on looking at skincare I can't afford.

Change ≠ Failure

When a couple or polycule decides to be friends, we call it a “failed relationship,” yet when friends decide they want a romantic relationship, we don’t call it a “failed friendship.” Because outside of the overly-regulated are of romantic relationships, we understand that the presence of a status quo is not success.