James: *holding Up His Smudged Glasses* Reg, Darling, Can You Get Me Something To Clean My Glasses With?

sirius: i feel like i absorb the positive energy from the people around me.

remus: so you’re kind of like a dementor?

sirius: no, i don’t suck the joy out of people.

remus: debatable.

sirius: WHATDOYOUMEAN?!

james: what’s the shadiest thing you’ve ever seen someone do?

remus: turn a bunch of kids into werewolves, just to start an army.

lily: being prejudiced against half-bloods and muggle borns whilst being a half-blood themselves.

sirius: try to conceive for years, then become abusive to the very kids they were dying to have.

james: o-oh, i was just gonna say nick my sweaters right after they said that their fashion sense is nothing like mine…

regulus: i never said, nor did such a thing.

modern-day era hc:

james potter and sirius black would definitely be co-owners of a meme page.

james: sirius is about to come home from his third date any minute now.

regulus: third date? with the same guy? did he talk during the first two?

james: yeah no, i’m as shocked as you are.

lily rejected james for the 700th time, and he ran out of tissues to cry into.

james: *tears out a page from ‘the song of achilles’ and wipes his tears*

remus, only noticing the book cover and james’ crying: yeah…i get why you’re crying, that book is pretty fucking sad.

james: my love life is pretty fucking sad too, moony.

sirius and remus are texting.

sirius: can we break up for 1 hour, 6 minutes and 11 seconds?

remus: no, but what for?

sirius: i wanna listen to adele’s new album from another perspective.

remus: as tempting as your offer sounds, it’s still not a valid excuse for me to dump you, sirius.

sirius tricked james into telling him about his relationship with regulus, regulus isn’t happy.

regulus: first things first, james here is a fucking idiot, and if he tells you anything fucking different he’s a liar and a fucking snake.

regulus: *smacks james on the forehead*

regulus: fuck you.

headcanon:

sirius black’s nervous tick is chewing on the tip of his middle finger, but his rbf makes him look like he’s purposely flipping everyone off.

sirius: *places a newly rolled blunt on the street*

sirius: it’s a highway…get it? highway? cause blunt and road…y’know?

james: *throws his shoe at sirius*

lily: *hexes him bald*

remus: *takes off his wedding ring and places it in sirius’ hand*

regulus: *updates his insta bio to ‘only child’*

plot: sirius got dumped.

james: do you feel like you weren’t enough? is that why you feel so choked by your emotions?

sirius: i know i’m not enough, otherwise he wouldn’t have left me.

marlene: did you get the weird breathing trouble yet?

sirius: what, asthma? i’ve had that for ages.

james and marlene: *burst out laughing*

sirius: *gives in and starts laughing through his tears*