"Daddy, Why Do You Only Have One Leg When Mommy Has Two?"

"Daddy, why do you only have one leg when Mommy has two?"

Hello! This request was written by @astrid-foreverythingelse! Hope you enjoy!

“Daddy, why do you only have one leg when Mommy has two?”

Hiccup looked up from the vegetables he was chopping into the curious eyes of his daughter across from him.  A piece of parchment with a crude drawing of sheep in a pasture lay forgotten in front of her.  However, the charcoal remained in her hand as she absentmindedly fiddled with it, waiting patiently for her father’s response.

Hiccup glanced down at his prosthetic and then back to his daughter.  “I have two legs!  See?” he said, stepping around the table and dancing in a small circle.

Zephyr laughed.  “No, Daddy!  How come Mommy has two normal legs and you have a metal one!”

“Well, I’d hardly call your mother’s legs normal,” he joked, earning him a punch in the arm from his wife.  She scooped up some of the vegetables and playfully glared at him, crossing the room to the firepit as Hiccup massaged his sore arm.

“Daddy,” Zephyr insisted through giggles.  “Uncle Tuffie said a troll took it ‘acuz you wouldn’t give him a buckle off your s’irt.  Is that true?”

Astrid snorted over by the firepit, and Hiccup rolled his eyes.  “You’re absolutely right Zephyr,” Astrid said before Hiccup could say a word.  “Your Daddy loves his shirt buckles so much that he let a troll take his leg instead of losing one.”

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More Posts from Sir-gwaine-of-camelot and Others

3 months ago

In regards of the Trump government scraping all trans inclusion in its queer information portion of its websites I have made this thing. Spread the word. Don't let them pretend we never existed.

text: "IT'S NOT LGB IT'S LGBTQ+" image: shows a digitally drawn intersex inclusive progress flag made with a paint like texture. Shows three kittens in front made in the colors light blue, white and pink.
text: "FUCK TRUMP" image: shows a digitally drawn intersex inclusive progress flag made with a paint like texture. Shows three kittens in front made in the colors light blue, white and pink.
top text: "IT'S NOT LGB IT'S LGBTQ+" image: shows a digitally drawn intersex inclusive progress flag made with a paint like texture. bottom text: "WE WILL NEVER FORGET OUR TRANS SIBLINGS" with the word "never" underlined in red.

P.S: Don't like! Reblog! <3

EDIT: Well this got a lot of attention! I got a few users asking to print or repost my art and I am unimaginably grateful to everyone's interest, especially since it's a really simple drawing I made on a whim haha! Anyone who is looking to print these out to hang or hand out or repost on another platform is free to do so, although I ask you to credit me and let people know it's from my Tumblr profile! If anyone wishes to do anything else with my art or post and wants to clarify what I consent to then they can message me privately and I'll explain! <333 all my love to my queer siblings

3 months ago
Screenshot of a tweet that reads: Yknow what I’d like to see as an illustrator?

A database of cultural clothes/items submitted by people within those cultures with info like how often its used and reference photos

It would make diversity in art so much easier

Is there something like that??

tweet

Something like this would be so colossally helpful. I'm sick and tired of trying to research specific clothing from any given culture and being met with either racist stereotypical costumes worn by yt people or ai generated garbage nonsense, and trying to be hyper specific with searches yields fuck all. Like I generally just cannot trust the legitimacy of most search results at this point. It's extremely frustrating. If there are good resources for this then they're buried deep under all the other bullshit, and idk where to start looking.

4 years ago

Merlin fic ideas/prompts

I’ve had so many ideas for fics since getting active in the fandom, and while I’ve written pieces of things, I haven’t finished anything yet. So, I want to release some of these ideas into the wild for anyone interested to run with. If it ends up inspiring me further later, well, the more the merrier, right?

“I would not allow Merlin to be executed under any circumstances,” Arthur said. “I mean it. He could practice magic under the king’s nose, and I would still see no harm come to him.”

Uther tells Arthur to reward Merlin after he publicly saves his life again. Instead of giving him money or some other minor gift the king might recommend, Arthur decides to give him an education worthy of a noble, which carries implications.

A blizzard overwhelms Camelot while Arthur, Merlin, and the knights are on a patrol. The life-threatening weather forces them to seek refuge, and the nearest sanctuary turns out to be a magical temple. After learning Arthur’s identity the temple guardians/priestesses intend to refuse them shelter. Merlin reveals himself as Emrys to ensure their entry.

KNUCKLE KISSES

2 months ago
Rare Vent Art From A Few Months Ago
Rare Vent Art From A Few Months Ago
Rare Vent Art From A Few Months Ago
Rare Vent Art From A Few Months Ago

rare vent art from a few months ago

2 months ago

I’m so excited for this!! Maybe I’ll actually finish some of my Mercelot fics this time 😅

✨mercelot Week 2025✨

✨mercelot week 2025✨

✨starting MAY 25th to MAY 31st✨

FOR FANFIC WRITERS - prompts and/or themes:

Day 1: “it took you almost 4 years to fully trust me, and it took you all of one minute to stop.” + Lancelot Du Lac episode AU

Day 2: “do you not get it? we don't ever get a happy ending, we don't ever go home!” + hurt/comfort

Day 3: “whether you like it or not, i’m not giving up on you” + pre-season 4 AU

Day 4: “i will be the greatest loss of your life” + humor

Day 5: “what about me?” + the darkest hour AU

Day 6: bamf!lancelot + angst

Day 7: free day + au of your choice

there is an ao3 collection under the name which can be found here “mercelot week 2025” - if you wish to add your fics

please put the day and prompt in your summary if posting to ao3.

reminder: merlin/lancelot do not need to be the one to say the line or be the things exactly! and the + means and/or. these are mostly for inspiration alone. if you would like to just write the quote for day one, for example, and not use the au, then that's perfectly fine.

FOR GIFS/ VIDEO/ ART CREATORS - quotes and/or themes:

Day 1: “somewhere between the night we met and the day you left, there was love, so much love.” + red

Day 2: parallels + orange

Day 3: au + yellow

Day 4: “it’s strange. i felt less lonely when i didn’t know you.” + green

Day 5: song lyrics + blue

Day 6: favorite poem + purple

Day 7: free day + rainbow

rules:

must be posted on tumblr so i can reblog!

please tag your posts as #mercelotweek2025 and/or tag this account directly.

NSFW is allowed, just please tag appropriately.

have fun and enjoy yourself! this week is all about supporting each other and sharing your work!

questions, concerns, or just wanna talk? you can dm or send asks at this account or my main @bellamyblakru

2 years ago
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings (Movies) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Éomer Éadig/Faramir (Son of Denethor II), Aragorn | Estel/Éomer Éadig/Faramir (Son of Denethor II) Characters: Faramir (Son of Denethor II), Éomer Éadig, Aragorn | Estel Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Post-War of the Ring, Aragorn is King of Gondor, Éomer and Faramir are married, Éomer and Faramir are the Kings of Rohan, Minas Tirith, Burns, Chronic Pain, Because his father tried to burn him alive, Caring Éomer, Bold Éomer Éadig, Flirting, Embarrassment, Soft Éomer Éadig, Men Crying, LOTR men are the best, Bathing/Washing, Scars, Faramir has Chronic Pain, no toxic masculinity here!, Magic, The hands of a King are the hands of a healer, Kissing, Anal Sex, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Smut, POV Faramir Summary:

Faramir has chronic pain after being burnt alive by his father. When Aragorn finds out, the King insists on trying to help heal him. This leads to Faramir and Éomer telling Aragorn their feelings for him, and the three of them end up in bed together.


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5 months ago

I absolutely LOVE this idea of other races not quite understanding exactly how much of these things it takes to effect a human and thus taking their precautions to an extreme.

The part about the dwarves got me thinking. Have you ever been to one of the Colorado skiing towns? The ones that are at a much higher elevation than most of their visitors are used to? Last year, when I went skiing, I remember seeing several “oxygen bars” where you could go and (from what I understand) just breathe a high content of oxygen to help combat altitude sickness. So, in relation to this post, what if the dwarves started developing little “sun cafes” where visiting humans could go to get their fill of sunlight, generously provided by local clerics/wizards? They could even have plants from the surface, because some humans don’t do well when they haven’t been around any type of greenery for an extended period of time.

I just feel like Sun cafes would be a really adorable addition to a fantasy world :)

Reading fantasy again, I've started thinking about how odd it is how in books like that, the non-human races invariably scoff at human frailty and vulnerability, even those that they'll call friends. Like that's mean?? Why would you be a dick to your friend who you know is not capable of as much as you are, and it's not their fault they were born like that. That's mean.

Like consider the opposite: Characters of non-human races treating their human companions like frail little old dogs. Worrying about small wounds being fatal - humans die of small injuries all the time - or being surprised that humans can actually eat salt, even if they can't stomach other spicy rocks. Being amazed that a human friend they haven't seen in 10 years still looks so young, they've hardly aged at all! And when the human tries to explain that they weren't going to just unexpectedly shrivel into a raisin in 10 years, the longer-lifespan friend dismisses this like no, he's seen it happen, you don't see a human for 10 or 20 years and they've shriveled in a blink.

Elves arguing with each other like "you can't take her out there, she will die!" and when the human gets there to ask what they're talking about, they explain to her that the journey will take them through a passage where it's going to be sunny out there. Humans burn in the sun. And she will have to clarify that no, actually, she'll be fine. They fight her about it, until she manages to convince them that it's not like vampires - humans only burn a little bit in the sun, not all the way through. She'll be fine if she just wears a hat.

Meanwhile dwarves are reluctant to allow humans in their mines and cities, not just out of being secretive, but because they know that you cannot bring humans underground, they will go insane if they go too long without seeing the sun. Nobody is entirely sure how long that is, but the general consensus is three days. One time a human tries to explain their dwarf companion that this is not true, there are humans that endure much longer darkness than that. As a matter of fact, in the furthest habited corners of the lands of the Northmen, the winter sun barely rises at all. Humans can survive three weeks of darkness, and not just once, but every single year.

"Then how do they sane?" Asks the dwarf, and just as he does, the conversation gets interrupted by the northland human, who had been eavesdropping, and turns to look at them with an unnerving glint in her colourless grey eyes, grinning while saying

"That's the neat part, we don't."

3 years ago

Knights of the Round Table Found Family Head

Canon

(Does this fit with historical context? No. Does this fit with the show? Maybe but unlikely. Did I have fun thinking about it? Absolutely.)

One of the first knightly shenanigans the round table boys did together when they got back to Camelot was to basically just set up in whichever rooms were closest to eachother (besides Leon, who would later regret not joining these shenanigans) and just not moving. There was so much uproar that it didn't even register as an issue, especially because Lancelot and Percival were sharing one because neither wanted to be the one to shuffle someone out of the rooms next door.

But also, none of these men were overly used to having rooms of their own, so it just turned into a common room type place? Like two rooms eventually got all the beds and thats where sleeping happens but the other room just kinda... became their own version of a home?

Because if you think about it, the commoner knights were commoners, who had a very different version of living to nobility. And I can see these guys trying to be proper nobility but hating how... isolating it is. And while they can go to the tavern every night for company, it's really far and people look at them like they're different now. So it starts out with them all congregating together after meals in one of the rooms so that they could be themselves for a little while(and Merlin, Arthur, Gwen, or Leon would join them because honestly, it was nice to just exist around eachother as equals) And thats obviously not very efficient because it was never the same room and sometimes one of them would be trying to sleep because they had an early patrol, so it was really just a matter of logic to move the beds into two rooms and have one common room, so Elyan moves his bed into Gwaine's room but eventually musical beds happens until everyone is happy with the arrangement (I always like to put Gwaine with Percival even if I'm not shipping them because their dynamic makes me happy but like, it's up to you who goes where).

Then eventually things have calmed down and the Steward is like "what... the fuck?" But in polite speak. And goes to Merlin, who everyone goes to for things regarding the Round Table people because he's the only one who understands the dynamic fully, and he goes on about how this isn't how it's supposed to be and they're going to make scandals and everything is terrible and he has to fix it. And Merlin listens to his grievances and eventually just says, real politely, "listen, I know they're unconventional, but they're knights and it's been approved by Prince Regent Arthur, but I will make sure that your worries are addressed to him." Because he's at the point where he's #TiredOfEverything. And he does bring it up to Arthur, who mulls it over for roughly 2.45 minutes and basically just says "ehhh, it isn't hurting anything and it makes them happy" and there's A Look that translates to "and I enjoy it too" so they end up just letting them and it becomes one of those things that happens in Camelot that everyone knows but now it's just a thing.

And the absolutely chaotic energy of the boys living together lends itself to some pretty baller shenanigans, but also some pretty fucking good bonding.

Fanfic is a free hobby.

It's one of the last few things we can have as a society that's free. You can engage, for free. People give you things (art, stories, etc), for free.

Don't buy into the consummerism just because it's everywhere else.

You don't have to consume everything you interact with. You don't have to use things, just because they exist.

You're allowed (still, for now), to have things that are enjoyable for free.

Do you realise how insane the world is? We don't have many places where we can just be, for free anymore, but ao3 is. Did you notice we don't have ads in ao3? We don't have pop ups? Where ELSE do we not have that?

Where else can you just go and not have to wait for a commercial to be over or for ads to be on the sidelines?

I don't think the younger people understand, but the whole of internet used to be like this. YouTubers would do Youtube for free, just because. You couldn't monetise your internet presence before.

Ao3 is like a little preserved corner of the internet where the old internet used to be, and it's being attacked by people who do not understand that free things are allowed to exist without judgment.

Please don't ruin this for us.

Some of us need it.

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