Going All Willy-nilly On That Dick

The door door to door salesman and the door knob door to door salesman ahould be required to have an oiled up testicular torsion-off to the death in my living room in order to fairly decide who gets to install the door into the frame (they keep the hinges and screws behind their little ears)

Markiplier in the reverse bear trap

if you're gonna mock psychosis, consider this:

1. you are a cunt

2. you're a cunt

3. you're a fucking cunt

4. you're a cunt

5. you are, in fact, a cunt.

Who is this jersey Mike and why’s he got so many subs

I’m the type of guy who likes jokes and fun. Holler if you want me 🤑

feels weird being like. yeah i think boobs and ass and penis are cool, no i do not want to physically interact sexually with a person, but also i'll like platonically honk your boob or hog or whatever with the same level of seriousness as like giving you a high five

they should make weight loss ads illegal and I’m not kidding

sorry to have to tell you this but if a stranger comes to your inbox or slides in your DMs asking you for your money with some sob story, no matter how tragic and convincing the story is, they are a scammer — especially if the story is obviously copied and pasted, formatted in the exact same way as the other 100 bots in your inbox

Nothing will radicalize you faster than asking the people whose job is to help (like therapists, the police, etc) for help

the police budhget should be one dirty old penny that smells & is cursed