Hiiii :3

im not tall. tou're just egregiously short

look at me. listen. you need to take that six foot something transfem and you need to lay her on your chest and stroke her hair gently and rub her back and hold her tight like a beloved stuffed animal. do you understand me. you need to hold the tall girls in your life like you would anyone else. LISTEN to me

forcing my transfem puppygirl to shower but rewarding her by letting her see my soapy boobs.

new pfp!!!!!!!!!!!!! yippie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"the magnus archives sounds cool! what are the content warnings?"

PENIS

COCK

just sleep on it right next time silly

i slept on my leg wrong im in hell

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

THEY KILLED HIM :(((

and the shitty ass litmus paper I conjured from my rock pocket

What did y'all do on valentine's day because I started a chemical leak

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits