I Think "take A Hike" Is Like The Funniest Response To Someone. Like Dude Just Get Outta Here. And Go

It’s a breezy summer day and the rustling from the leaves outside sound like whispers from my small apartment. I’m sitting in front of my laptop, silently studying the 1.6 billion faces speaking simultaneously in front of me. It’s Monday, the day of the weekly conference call between all Muslims. We have been required to attend this Skype meeting from the the tender age of fetus, but I had never spoken in one of them before. 

That changes today. 

“Hey guys, what if…” I start to say. 

Nobody hears me, but I refuse to be silent. How could I show my face again on Tumblr if I couldn’t even save my mayonnaise friends from death? How could I expect to earn their respect? Anon was right; why hadn’t I done this before? Thousands of lives had paid the price for my ignorance, but not anymore.

“What if you guys….. stopped killing people.“ 

Suddenly, silence. 

1,643,398,023 pairs of eyes are on me. My heart is in my throat as the ISIS leader gives me a blank expression. 

A single tear rolls down my cheek. "Please.” I say with a broken voice. 

He is moved. 

“Aight”.

being meguca is suffering kermit-san

he was actually right about this btw

sonicfox deserves to fucking win i dont care about any of these other bitches

I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOUU I LOVE YOU SO MUCHHH

Me, while watching a critically acclaimed film that was well received by audiences: why did no one tell me this film was so good

welcome to the void

there is nothing here

tumblr has erased

all that you hold dear

yet there is one thing

that still hasn’t changed

today is still fingers in his ass

Sunday,,,,,,,

I hate explaining jokes but this fucking scene from Kung Pow makes me lose my shit every time: 

The children screaming “We’re children!” like they’re Pokemon

Cans of Pringles in the background 

Shopkeeper’s voice breaking the microphone levels 

“Babe-y”! 

The shitty cgi hand with the phone

He doesn’t even dial the phone

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭INEED TO GET GROCERIES AGAIN😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭