[video By Soupygarbagejuice. Original Caption: Stuie]

Official: We’re looking for a dangerous fugitive from the Dynasty by the name of Essek Thelyss, have you seen him recently?

Caleb: I’m sure I don’t know who you’re talking about

Essek, hiding under the table: *using mage hand to rotate all the jars labelled “Essek” to hide his name whenever the officer glances away*

guys guys guys, fellow critters, oh my god, everyone please go listen to ‘Strawberry Wine’ by Noah Kahan and think about Caleb and the blumentrio while you do. it’s so sweet and sad and it’s so perfect for them, my heart can’t take it

like? do you hear?? these lyrics?? they so perfectly encapsulate how Caleb thinks of him and Astrid and Eadwulf. they loved each other deeply. they were forced together due to circumstance. he misses them dearly every day. he could never be with them again.

“If I could lose you, I would”

“Strawberry wine, and all the time we used to have/Those things I miss, but know are never coming back”

“If I was empty space and you were a formless shape, we’d fit/But love leaves little runway, and every time we run/Straight over it”

and “No thing defines a man like love that makes him soft” followed by “for a moment, I see you” reminds me so vividly of drunk Caleb mistaking Jester for Astrid, and it makes me wonder how many other times his new family reminded him of his old one.

did Fjord ever laugh like Eadwulf? did Molly have the same taste in drinks as Astrid? did Caduceus and the Wildmother remind him of Eadwulf and the Raven Queen? did he ever give Astrid the same wildflowers that Yasha had pressed in her journal? did he ever wake up curled beside the Nein in the dome and think, for just a brief moment, he was somewhere else, huddled against a different band of ragtag wannabes?

Spreading my Demiromantic Jon agenda one doodle at a time.

He’s thinking about Martin…

widomauk is heartbreaking to me because it truly feels like Molly always had a little soft spot for Caleb. But I think Caleb was trying to stay distant and didn't really let himself get attached like that, and he just. Didn't realize how much he actually cared about Mollymauk until his Circus Man was gone. And then, in his grief, he just held onto Molly even more, with all his heart.

Burying Mollymauk with his letter, asking Jester if she can bring him back, dropping to his knees to dig up Molly's grave with his own hands. The memorial in stained glass. Making sure there's a bedroom for when the last of the Nein finally comes home.

Caleb trying to convince himself to run, that night before Mollymauk dies. "Look at this one. He's like a walking rainbow. What is this? Why are you with him? It makes no sense. He's a circus performer. He's not going to help you."

And then in Eiselcross, Caleb asking himself why he should stay. Holding the Magician card in his hands, the card Molly drew for him, and admitting, "I know that we're supposed to go where Molly is. Otherwise we wouldn't have seen the things we've seen, we wouldn't be the Mighty Nein." Heading into Cognouza with every intent to save the friend he lost.

And it's this fascinating contrast of Molly falling for Caleb fast, but never taking things further than a little playful teasing. Because he knows how terrified Caleb is of intimacy, is still working out his boundaries, isn't ready to open up like that again. And then he's gone--too sudden, too soon. And in that absence, Caleb starts to spiral and just realize, Oh, I do love these people, this team, this little family.

And maybe he loved Molly, still loves Molly, and nurtures this growing fondness for him in quiet moments, worrying at the lucky stone in his pocket and daring to hope for reunion--

ive also come to the conclusion that "laziness" is probably the stupidest, most hurtful, least useful, deliberately cruel concept in the world

Instead of apologizing for liking "trashy" media, consider: what is it doing well? If you like it, if it's making you feel pleasure and interest, then it must be succeeding at something. Is it shaping a set of emotional beats that you find satisfying to watch play out? Did it craft a character you find really compelling? Is something in the styling and aesthetics speaking to you? Did it unexpectedly resonate with a mood or experience you needed to see reflected right then?

However shallow or flawed a piece of media is, if you like it, it's because of something it did well - at least well enough to affect you, on the day that you encountered it.

There are a lot of good reasons to acknowledge this. One is about gratitude and manners: someone worked hard on that thing, and if they provided something that gave you happiness and pleasure, it's nice to honor that. Another is about breaking down the insidious habit of sorting everything into simple good/bad boxes. A piece of media, like a person, can do a lot of things wrong and a lot of things right, and the things on one side do not magically erase the other.

But the most important reason, I believe, is to get in the habit of celebrating what brings you pleasure and happiness. All your life there have been and there will be people telling you that you find joy in the wrong things, that if a particular thing makes you feel good it shows that there's something wrong with you. I reject that utterly. If a particular thing makes you feel good then there's something right, about you and about that thing. I'm not saying that pleasure is the only important thing or that every pleasure should be indulged indiscriminately. All I'm saying is that pleasure is in and of itself a good thing, and deserves notice.

a comic about fix-it fanfics

Co-signed

may his pussy haunt the narrative forever

the point of art is not to be great but to make it transparently obvious that there is something wrong with you