Here’s To The People With Disabilities That Aren’t Talked About Often. People Who Don’t See Tumblr

Diego and Allison: Hey let's go beat the shit out of racists

I haven't seen a warning for it going around so TUA S3 EP10, a warning for trypophobia at about the 32:30 mark and a quicker moment at about 34:20

klaus has this habit of searching for answers and purpose in the same place he lost them. his autonomy was stolen from him as a child, and he lives with that loss every day. it’s quite common for people with that experience to live with dissociative symptoms, and i actually think klaus is a realistic portrayal of that. while it’s never outright said that it’s dissociation he deals with, i think a lot of survivors could probably see it in him. he’s always seemed to feel a disconnect with himself, with his own body (for example – and this is a small one – when he told ben “you’re not getting in this body,” rather than my body). his identity is something transient, something that shifts drastically sometimes depending on the situation he’s in, which is a common experience in people with dissociative symptoms – we’re like “chameleons.” 

he forgets key things regarding his trauma: that, or his brain will twist the events to make them more palatable to himself. he didn’t remember being killed as a child, even though it happened multiple times. and despite not remembering anything, he still has visceral reactions when it comes to being confined. he may not consciously remember every event, but his body does, and so he reacts accordingly, as if the threat of being killed again were a present one. because the body remembers the loss of control, it remembers the autonomy that was once stolen. then there’s “bus ball.” obviously, it was an objectively shitty, terrifying thing, being once again murdered, multiple times by your own father and abuser – and as an experiment, no less. despite that, the events were portrayed as something that was for the most part fun, almost. and when he vaguely recounted said events later on, he referred to it as “bus ball.” like it really was nothing more than a game. that’s another common dissociative symptom, and a common trauma symptom: being so disconnected on a certain level from your own trauma that you’re able to talk about it like it’s nothing. that you’re able to remember a skewed version of it so that you don’t have to internalize any of the real terror.

touch is another one. klaus is a very tactile person. he communicates well through touch. but he often doesn’t like being touched, unless it’s from someone he knows, loves and trusts.

he startles easily, too. will jump back at sudden movements or words, gets frightened by loud noises and will cover his ears.

his need for connection is relevant here, too. he has a hard time being alone with himself, and so he finds people to cling to, or finds people that will cling to him, just to stave off those feelings and to ground himself, almost. sometimes it spirals out of control, like with the cult. but his constant need for connection stems from feeling disconnected.

one of his passing comments to luther in s1 (”I remember my first time… oh no. i don’t”) hits hard, too. it’s not uncommon for trauma victims to experience hypersexuality as a result of this loss of autonomy. and then, to not even remember some of these encounters (obviously, the drugs/alcohol likely play a role in this not remembering. but hey, what’s addiction often a symptom of? oh yeah. trauma.)

this disconnect he feels from his own body is also why he was able to have certain encounters even with people he didn’t like. keechie comes to mind. he didn’t like keechie, that was made clear. but it sounds like he still had no problem having sex with him, despite this. it’s common, when you have dissociative symptoms, to feel this sort of disconnect. you don’t always care what happens to a body that doesn’t feel like yours, hell, you can enjoy it, sometimes – even if you don’t like the person you’re doing it with.

it’s why he gets off on torture, too. klaus being a masochist was clearly portrayed in episode four, but then was referenced again two other times. (”if i see a boner, i’m out” when he was being tied up, and, “i’m going to beat you, and not the way you like it.”) when you grow up tortured and become accustomed to it it’s easy for the brain to say “hey, this is unbearable so actually we like this thing now. that’ll make it bearable!” i mean, obviously it’s a little more complicated than that, but that’s the gist of the situation. 

you often find comfort – or even pleasure – in familiarity, even when familiarity isn’t safe. we see that in klaus.

and that leads me back to my main point: klaus searches for answers, he searches for purpose in the same places he lost them. if he can give up his body to anyone who will take it, then maybe he can take back autonomy, is what he might think. if he can have a say in his own destruction, whether it’s addiction or reckless behavior, then maybe he can take back control. 

but that’s never truly how it plays out. a trauma survivor will never find what they’re looking for this way. i believe that klaus is starting to realize this, even if he does run into setbacks, and even though he will continue to run into setbacks. if he wants to find control, and if he wants to find purpose, he will have to reroute that energy into a path of recovery rather than destruction. it’s a hard hill to climb, but we know he can do it.

i could say more about this, but i think this says enough, for now.

Klaus : In my defense, I simply don’t vibe with the law.

Instead of asking your SO where they wanna eat, try asking them, “Guess where I was going to take you to eat?” Their first response is usually where they wanna go. Works for gifts too.

ACE FEI IS CANON WE WON

The Umbrella Academy S3 + Text Posts Part 1

Polytheist asks!

To spice up the end of your Yuletide season ^^

Were you born into your faith? If not, how did you discover it?

What draws you to your Gods? What do you like about them?

Is your practice more ritualistic or casual? What does it look like?

How do you picture the universe? What is your idea of its cosmology?

Do you believe in spirits, angels or demons?

Are there Gods you willfully don’t follow? What are the reasons behind this choice?

What does your ideal altar look like?

What are some of your stronger UPG’s?

Do you have a patron/matron? How did you choose them?

If you could have a direct conversation with your deity/deities right now, what would you tell them?

Do you pray? If so, what do your prayers look like?

How important is mythology in your practice? How much credit do you give it?

What are some devotional acts you actively engage in?

How would you define your Gods? (have fun with that one)

Are you faithful to one specific pantheon or is your belief more eclectic?

How do you communicate with your deities the best?

Do you associate certain Gods with specific songs? Share them!

What are your thoughts on godspousing?

How have your Gods affected your life?

List a few of the deities you worship and associate each with a quote your think represents them best!

Feel free submit any of these questions in my ask box too, I do want to share in the fun! 🥺

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