I Just Want Someone To Be Soft With Me And Cuddle Me And Call Me Baby, Is That Too Much To Ask For :')

Trying so hard to be a person who accepts other people's (difference in) pov without feeling ehem, but don't think it's for me 😳🥺😖

But like always, Imma fake it till I make it or else I'll have no friends hahahahaha

um so we have a group assignment and a person I already hold bias against (despite being a friend *sigh* splitting sucks) suggested a topic after I did and people liked that more + when I said it's all interconnected and could be a common one topic, another friend said ooh yes but then former she was like ya but let's not make it complicated and then everyone agreed and now I feel pissed and annoyed and I feel like I wanna tell them to fuck off and that I leave the group and that I'm not going to say anything else if they're not taking anything I'm saying (even if their points are a lil valid) and I'm taking it all personally and I wanna rage against all of them fuckers eventhough one of the other people in the group is a best friend and I feel sick with anger and I hate bpd fuck this fuck everything

What do you mean by “normal”? I, personally think of it as an aggregate of various definitions.

Normal is what we’re used to. Normal is the societally accepted way of behaving. Normal is uniformity, in the bad way. Normal is heteronormative, ableist, cissexist and sanist. Normal is a wand of control and power weaving mockery and shame; it is nothing but small minded, judgmental hypocrisy.

Spend your entire life listening to people normalize hetero relationships and that becomes your normal; spend your entire life being exposed to the humiliation of those who’re considered “different” and following the code of behavior which does not incite mockery becomes your normal; spend your entire life watching people with psychological illnesses be called ‘cr*zy’ and ‘ins*ne’ and the avoidance of being labeled the same and in the process, behaving according to society’s rules and regulations becomes your normal; spend your entire life learning about dichotomies and binaries and that becomes your normal. Thus, to put simply, normal is more than the societally accepted way of behaving, it is something we’re conditioned to - a spiral sucking you in down to the dot at the center, suffocating and hindering you and your mind’s expansiveness.

 When I think of “normalcy”, I think of what my family and friends, and even I at one point of time, used to refer to as being “normal”. I think of the clothes worn by actresses and dancers, that wasn’t normal, it was indecent and something worn only by the people in the film industry; people who were loud or flamboyant or funky or just indifferent to what society thought of them weren’t normal, they were cr*zy and those were the sort of people you found in a “mental hospital”; gay people weren’t normal, they were freaks of nature; thankfully, since being trans had a scientific explanation, that wasn’t not normal, but this condition could be applied to only people who were of the binary genders, non-binary was definitely not considered “normal”.

Apart from all this, “normal” is also a term used in place of “majority”. This may come as a shock to most, but what you assume to be a majority can in no way be called “normal”. Hence, teachers can’t generalize their students and assume that they’re all cishet, neurotypical and have no psychological illnesses.

 I do not condone calling people “normal”, it’s the same as the whole “most girls” rhetoric – redundant and narrow-minded.

 I’ve experienced humiliation and name calling for acting like a “cr*zy” person. I’ve been told to not “act like a r*tarded child” by my aunt. My uncle once told me I was, in fact, mentally challenged for he had met a lot of kids my age and none of them acted the way I did. One of my relatives told my cousin sister of age 7 to stop acting like an ins*ne person and proceeded to tell her how those people - who acted the way she was acting - were “locked up in a mental hospital because everyone thought they were mad people”.

  I’ve seen and heard people calling gay people “abnormal” and unnatural just because they were gay. In cishet people’s eyes, queer people aren’t normal because-

 A)    The majority of the population were thought to be cishet

B)    That was what they were used to and queer people were considered a “trend” or fad

C)    Society had conditioned them that way .

 Normalcy is a fallacy, it does not exist, it is the biggest scam ever after organized religion – but it still holds power, it can still break people, still make them drown in the feelings of insecurity and rejection, and if that isn’t enough for us to disown the entire concept, please tell me what is, for the last thing I want to do is be associated with something as disgusting as “normal”.  

difference between shipping and queerbaiting, you ask?

Drarry = Shipping

Sterek = Queerbaiting

something I'm proud of myself for : I have learned to ask for the things I need. A person to sit with when I study. Words of support when I'm freaking out over public speaking. Words of reassurance when I feel alone. Without shame, without guilt, without self criticism. and that's something.

I'm sad.

*Warning* for sanism - super hurtful/offensive stuff about people with mental illnesses

um, I just had this huge argument with my uncle about mental illnesses and terms used to refer to people with mental illnesses (in our native language - an offensive word), which are offensive and have a negative connotation and he treated the entire thing like a joke, spoke over me, said people with mental illnesses don't know best for themselves because they're not in their senses/not normal and then when I said you should use compassionate tersm, he said that no matter what words we use to refer to "them" it doesn't change the fact that they're cr*zy (translation of a Malayalam term), and then he walked away in the middle laughing and saying that I can say whatever I want - and right now I'm shaking with anger, my enthure body is vibrating and my eyes are tearing up and fuck my fingers are shaking it takes so much effort to type and I don't know how to deal with thjs. When I asked him if he's the one learning for psychology or I am, he said he knows the same things I do because he talks to people who're crazy for his cases (he's a lawyer btw) and he kept repeating that split personality is the same as bipolar disorder and when I said people with bipolar disorder don't agree with it/it isn't the right term, he did and said the above things and duck. He's treating it like a fucking fun debate topic while I'm shaking and trying not to cry in my room

I couldn't even make my argument properly because I kept shaking and I was speechless and my heart was on overdrive

And then then my grandma to came to ask me if I wanted to come out and I told her how I didn't and how it wasn't a fun topic that he was treated it like one and that it's something that affects people and its serious, she kept backing away and saying ya ya I was just asking, it's okay, it's okay and then she left without even acknowledginh what I saying like fuck

Knew Tumblr would not post it again, so I took screenshots like a genius 👀

what is harm reduction in simple, everyday terms? (because i like applying social justice approaches to my daily life for authenticity)

harm reduction is "here are some ways you can do *insert something with drawbacks/something that could be harmful/something that might cause health issues* safely" instead of "don't do this"; harm reduction "come to me, don't do it alone" instead of "stop doing this"; harm reduction is "you know yourself best, if you're doing something with full information, then it must mean something to you, so instead of judging you, I'll trust you and support you" instead of "if you know it's problematic/unhealthy just stop doing it"; harm reduction is "I'll meet you where you're at" instead of "you should be here instead/I'll bring you here/you should work on yourself and change where you are"; harm reduction is "you don't have to stop doing or start doing *insert above mentioned particular thing* to deserve unconditional acceptance and positive regard/help when you need it etc" instead of "you need to change *insert thing* to be worthy of aid".

this can be applicable for drug and alcohol use, sexual/reproductive health, eating disorders, self harm, and so on. harm reduction is a principle, a social justice approach, and an evidence based practice.

cw : mention of death/s*icidal ideation; original content, based on prompt idea by @writingprompts365

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Sunshine meant people; sunshine meant people, chatter, and moving about, forced to be a functional human being who had to survive in proper society. They hated how looking after their beloved pet had been turned into a chore by their family, how helping around seemed more like being ordered around; the injustice of never having a moment of peace and quiet, never having a moment of respite to themselves, the dread of having to be extraverted when the only thing they wanted to do was learn and write and read and goddamnit- be alone. But moonlight. Moonlight meant everything holy, precious, and hopeful. It meant dancing in the living room, eating cold chicken, listening to music on full blast, infinite creativity. Alas, nights were too short to fit one’s entire life into. Sleep was for the strong – for the ones who could manage time and socialization, for those who could live with people, for those who didn’t fall apart when denied solace in their own arms. They were weak, they did not sleep; if days were for existing, and nights were for living, had they not dreamed of dying for far too long to deserve to want to live?  

A character knows they should go to sleep but they purposefully do something else instead