Before You Say “Duh,” Remember They Are Using The Social Contagion Lie To Make Life Saving Health

Unfinished Cherik Fic

Hello, dear readers. I am tired, have been working on this fic for ages, and want validation and beta-readers—so I’m forcing y’all to beta read part of my (very unfinished, 3000 words of foreplay, Cherik fic.

"I'm gay, Erik! I like men! I like cock! Quite frankly, I like you just a bit more than 'friendly' would warrant!That's what everyone in this fucking house has been making fun of me over for the past week or so—probably longer. That's why you weren't let in on my secret, and that's why I didn't want you to know."Charles was well and truly angry, but simultaneously, he was petrified. He felt nauseous—and not in the good way—and heartbroken all at once. Erik was going to leave and never come back.

Erik ponders this for a moment, before sitting down across from Charles. He takes a deep breath before speaking. Oh, god, he was gearing up to reject Charles wasn't he? Yes, you could tell by the slight crease in his brow—the least he could do is make it quick, right? Just rip off the band-aid.

"I don't want to belittle the courage and bravery that it took you to come out. I have no intentions of taking away the significance of this moment, which is why I'm going to choose my next words very carefully." Erik takes another breath. Oh god here it comes! Charles braced himself.

"I think that might be one of the hottest things I've ever heard." Well, that's a strange way of rejecting somebody—what game is Erik playing at?

"What?" Charles said, brilliantly.

"I mean, it would be—the hottest thing, I mean—if you weren't so torn up about this. You've obviously been holding on to this for a while, and I just hate to see you in pain."

"Erik, wh-" he sounds so genuine it hurts. Charles has rarely seen this side of Erik, and when he has previously, words always failed him. He is in love with Erik—the trenches—no, the Mariana Trench, of love; the mere thought that his object of affection could, and would, reciprocate...it's a wave of joy, confusion, anger, and (most of all) hope.

"I like you, Charles. I like you quite a lot. I find you very alluring. Ich bin bis über beide Ohren verliebt. In your words, I 'like cock,' specifically yours." Charles was stunned speechless; he was over the fucking moon, and his face couldn't help but show it. Erik had the privilege of bearing witness to the most beautiful fucking smile ever seen. All of the positive emotions Charles thought gone, suddenly came rushing back. His blood was making whirlpools in his ears, his heart was beating like a kick-drum, butterflies were racing around in his stomach,

"...and," Erik continued—he probably said more, but Charles couldn't hear it over the sound of his blood. "I really hope you wouldn't be opposed if wanted to kiss you. Right now." His mind adds on a 'please,' which Charles melts at (just a bit).

"I..." Charles can't even comprehend what is happening. His heart is doing somersaults in his chest, his thoughts are rushing by at one million miles a minute, and—oh, Erik asked to kiss him.

"You're right, I'm sorry that was insensit-“

Charles smashed his face against Erik's, and placed himself atop the older mutant's lap. Erik was fucking surprised, to say the least. He froze for a short breath, his arms turned to stone around Charles' body, before his brain kicked into gear. Erik clawed at the telepath's face, in like of grabbing a particularly beautiful sculpture. Charles' grip proved much rougher, (at least compared to Erik's appreciative caress), as his fingers scraped through Erik's hair. Erik never had the pleasure of witnessing Charles lost in pleasure—hunger—and, he's now decided that it's his favorite thing.

One of his hands moved on to Charles' neck, holding him softly. He held Charles with such wonder; disbelief, maybe. Erik just couldn't believe that Charles was kissing him—Charles. Charles was kissing him. Beautiful, kind, compassionate, handsome, genius, Charles. He laughed against the smaller man's mouth, and Charles was hit with a sudden wave of elation, joy, and (more importantly) love. Erik loves him, him. Charles Xavier—rumpled professor, stubborn pain in the ass, mother-hen, homebody—Charles Xavier. Charles laughed back, and smiled against Erik's mouth. Charles felt his own arousal stirring, so he (painfully) breaks the connection between their lips.

"Erik," Charles panted. "Before I devour you—or before you devour me, I'm really not adverse to either—I just...you're amazing. I've been hearing your thoughts and living your feelings, but you know none of mine." Erik's expression was...perfection. There was a clear type of astonishment seeping through his eyes, elation shining through his smile, and blush coating the tips of his ears. It clearly took him a second or ten to process what Charles said.

"Charles you don't have to-" Charles silenced him with a finger to the lips. Erik found this incredibly arousing, so he allowed it.

"I... I've never been in love. Not before you. I lived my entire life surrounded by people whose love was purely two dimensional. It wasn't real, but that was all I knew. Then came you and... I've learned that love is one of the purest emotions possible. You've slowly made yourself a spot in my head, and to be quite honest, I can't say I mind all that much." Charles finally noticed the red surfacing beneath Erik's cheeks. Wow. I've never seen him blush before, but I definitely want to see it more. Erik's brain stopped working after 'I've never been in love before.' He was star-struck, and all of Charles' words were hitting him with a slight delay.

"I don't think I can explain the measure of comfort I find in the beating of your heart," Erik spoke mindlessly, his voice doused in gravel and honey. Charles flushed at the idea of Erik being able to feel something as intimate as his heartbeat, and his...y'know—it seemed only fair, since Charles had access to Erik's thoughts. Erik carefully tugged at an earlobe with his teeth, earning a surprised yelp in return. Licking an aimless trail, Erik ended his journey with his mouth resting on cartilage, and a devious smile on his face. Charles' skin flushed a pretty rouge, panting from the sampling of his ear.

"Or the hardening of your cock," Erik continued, air crackling through the fry in his voice. He made sure Charles was secured (via ass grope) before standing up, who then let out a positively filthy moan and tensed in surprise—his legs now wrapped around Erik's midsection. He found himself practically sat on Erik's prick, earning himself a moan from the metal-bender. "Jesus Christ, Charles, do you want me to drop you?" Erik asked incredulously, still stumbling over to his bed. "I mean, eventually, yes, but right now," Charles trailed off, as Erik toppled down onto the bed—telepath first—careful not to crush his partner. "Right now," he picked up, "I'm quite satisfied with the current positioning."

"Well, I'm quite dissatisfied with current the lack of nudity," Erik quipped, tugging at any and every metal fastening in Charles' clothing.

"Impatient, are we?" Charles smirked, feeling the loosening of his jeans.

"Xavier," he said with heat, "I'm not sure if you're aware, but I seldom have attractive men in my bed, and there is no way I'm not taking advantage of the one I've managed." Charles assisted Erik in the removal of both his cardigan and trousers, but stopped Erik in the removal of his pants before they went further. "Ah-ah-ah, not until we're on equal standing. I want to see you too," and fuck if that wasn't the hottest thing Erik had ever heard. "Shit, okay" he panted, quickly disrobing himself down to his pants. He gave Charles a second to appreciate the goods, then began to explore the pale chest laid out in front of him. It's toned plains were sparsely dotted with auburn freckles, porcelain skin overrun with soft hues of pinks and reds.

"Gött, you're beautiful...like you walked out of my dreams," Erik softly hissed, his hands grasping Charles' pectorals, and positioning his thumbs right above a set of pert nipples. Charles thrashed lightly against Erik, and a pleased whimper had managed to escape the confines of his throat. It was then that Erik noticed his own length positioned directly on top of Charles'; Erik then decided to shift his hips up and down lightly, making Charles cry out in ecstasy, his eyes screwing themselves shut. He also bit down on his lip beautifully, leaving a shock of pure white against the near magenta color of his lips. Suddenly, it became absolutely imperative that Erik kiss Charles right this second—and why shouldn't he, anyway? Erik did exactly that—and with impressive finesse for a man who could, as of now, barely remember his own name—pushing more of his weight against Charles, and incidentally, moving the flesh of Charles' nipples. Charles then responded with what could only be described as a mewl, and Erik took the opportunity to utilize his tongue and explore Charles' mouth.

Erik would usually have more self-control, especially since he felt that Charles deserved to be ravished properly. But, Charles made Erik feel things that he never felt before. Erik was selfish with Charles, gluttonous was a better word—perhaps indulgent. Charles was meant to be savored, yes, but Erik had lost his self-restraint the second he felt Charles' lips on his. As he pulled away, Erik tugged on Charles' bottom lip with his teeth. He'd always wanted to try that, and yes, he would love to do it again. Then, Erik had noticed something.

"Charles."

"What?"

Charles.

By the way he'd jumped in surprise, Erik knew he received his message. "Erik, are you sure-" he began, and was cut off by a (surprisingly sweet) kiss. "Libeling, I know. The reason I wanted you out of my head was because I thought you wouldn't like what you found in there. My head is not a happy place to be, but around you...around you it's not too bad. Also, there's this embarrassing school-girl crush I have on a ridiculously handsome telepath, but you wouldn't happen to know anyone like that, would you?" Charles giggled—giggled—and quite adorably, too.

And at that, Charles let his powers off their leash. Contrary to what one might expect, telepathy is not being a 'mind-reader' in the literal sense. It's similar to reading someone's energy, as many thoughts aren't actually articulate—hell, half of them aren't even cognizant. Often times, they're muddy, and different people think in different ways. Charles thinks in feelings (or vibes) and he reads in feelings as a result. This makes it a bit complicated when reading someone who thinks in other methods; for a while, it was like trying to move a muscle that wasn't there. Now, it's simply like translating a second language, i.e he can do it if he wants, but it also expends energy—if he doesn't have that energy, then he can't translate the language, but that doesn't mean he can't hear the language. It's still very intimate to read someone's mind, obviously, and Charles is feeling a bit prudish for blushing like a nun in a sex shop. Although, Erik doesn't seem to mind much.

"What, does he go to another school?"

"Yes; I draw his name in the margins of my notebook," Erik said, as he began traveling down Charles' body. Charles let out a near maniacal laugh, and was far too amused by the joke to notice Erik's movement, until he felt the tongue on his nipple. All laughter was soon forgotten and instead cut off by a wanton moan. Charles nestled his fingers in Erik's hair, gently enough so he could still move freely. Erik continued to lick his way down Charles' lithe body, giving special attention to the few freckles he came across. Suddenly, Erik was being dragged upwards, then flipped onto his back. Charles sat atop him in triumph, seeming to have expected a fight. He began to inch downward, toying with the waistband of Erik's pants. "I'm sorry to cut you off, but I've been wanting this for longer than you can imagine," he drawled, sliding his boxers off torturously slow. "I've been imagining this since you pulled me out of the water," Erik replied through a moan, as his cock was exposed to the cold air.

"I've been imagining this since I read your mind," Charles stated before promptly sucking the ever living shit out of Erik's dick. His head was enveloped in the warmth of Charles' mouth, and Schieße was it good.

Before I pulled you out of the water, Charles added, as if that would change anything. His tongue worked skillfully, and Erik could have sworn that Charles was put on this earth just to drive him mental. Without any prelude, Charles took all of Erik with startling ease—his nose buried in Erik’s auburn nest of wiry hairs. “Schieße…ist gut”, Erik sagte als seine Stimme unglaublich niedrig fiel—and his thoughts fizzled out entirely as Charles moaned around his cock. Erik speaking German? Hot. Charles understanding German? The best decision of his high-school career.

TBC

“never use this word because it’s common, instead use all of these things that i’ll call synonyms even though they carry different connotations and will change the meaning of your dialogue if you use them” — very bad and unfortunately very common writing advice

Summary: "If we can go one week with no lies, then we will go on a field trip, only the winners, of course."

That was Charles' idea...to be completely honest, Charles only made this bet so Erik would flirt with him...Charles' plan was working out to be spectacularly terrible.

There had been a bet going around the school, among the staff, mainly. Charles had been preaching the importance of honesty and transparency, but he quickly realized that his colleagues needed more incentive.

"If we can go one week with no lies, then we will go on a field trip, only the winners, of course."

That was Charles' idea and so far, it was quite fun. To be completely honest, Charles only made this bet so Erik would flirt with him -unintentionally, mind you. Two days in, and Charles' plan was working out to be spectacularly terrible. Erik was seemingly avoiding Charles, which was a valid strategy, but still.

Charles had walked into the lounge room, hoping to catch Erik and a cup of coffee. Erik was indeed there, likely on his way out of the lounge. Erik wore that borderline sinful black turtleneck along with a tight pair of pants.

"Erik, fancy a game of chess during our 30 minute break?"

Erik had finally taken note of Charles' presence and became extremely nervous for some godforesaken reason. Erik knew the reason: he likes Charles, it's as simple as that. He loves those piercing blue eyes, the kind smile, the soft, untouched hands of Charles Xavier. He won't deny it... okay, well, maybe he will. Everyone seems to know this fact besides Charles. 

" I would love to Charles but I have tests to grade," he said with an obviously fake smile. Technically, that wasn't a lie; Erik would love to play a game with Charles and he did have tests to grade. Charles sighed, "oh, I see...well, perhaps next time then." Erik gave a genuine smile this time.

"Perhaps." On the way out, he brushed past Charles, both of their faces reddening madly. Oh, if only they could see each other from an outsider's perspective. They are so obviously in love even a blind man could see it and a deaf girl could hear it.

***

Charles was walking down one of the school's many corridors, in search of one Erik Lehnsherr.

"Charles," Raven spoke from behind him. "Yes?" He queried, turning to see her. "Have you seen Hank?" So Raven had the same idea as Charles it seems.

"That depends, have you seen Erik?"

"Ooh, are you trying to seduce him or something?"

"I won't tell if you won't."

"Deal, Erik is by the fountain reading."

"Lovely, Hank is in the tennis court."

Charles immediately turned around and began pacing to his destination. 'Of course Erik was reading' Charles thought to himself. He strolled over to one of the many exits of the building.  Charles wandered lost in thought . Maybe I'll have a romantic moment with Erik by the fountain, like in all of those Rom-coms that Raven keeps telling me about. Maybe we could be like Bella and Edward—less cliche of course... Unbeknownst to Charles, he was about to walk face first into his Edward. This realization came with the audible thud of Charles' face colliding with the muscly chest of Erik, Erik's book now on the floor as a result.   Charles looked up to find a very flustered Erik—not that Erik looked flustered, but the bar of flustered for the (usually stoic) Erik is very low. 

"Erik, hello again.  Sorry, let me-"

Charles bent down at the exact same time Erik did.  Their foreheads met with a (less audible, but still) very painful thud, sending both men backwards on their asses. 

"Fuck" Erik muttered.  Erik looked up to see Charles: his legs bent upward and nearly sprawled out with his hand against his forehead.  For some reason (again, Erik knew the reason), Charles seemed to be the most captivating creature on earth, far more interesting than Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere.  Charles had looked up about four seconds before Erik realized he was staring.  Erik's eyes quickly darted away from Charles' strikingly blue ones.  "Well, I had been meaning to run into you, but this was not what I had in mind." Erik chuckled at this.

"I would hope." Charles smiled at Erik.  On the outside, Erik simply sat in nearly the exact position of Charles, mouth slightly open but still with a calm demeanor.  On the inside it sounded more like this:

Holy shit, Charles' eyes are piercing through my fucking soul.  If we were back in about 400 b.c I would think this man is Jesus and confess my sins to him...

"Well, Jesus was actually brown—likely with dark eyes. He was born in Nazareth, which was in the Middle East.  The only reason we think Jesus is white is because DaVinci was commissioned to paint a picture of Jesus.  He, of course, modeled it after his boyfriend at the time." Erik was hit with an abrupt sense of confusion.

"Hey-"

"I can't help if your thoughts are loud, Erik!"

"Right..."

Erik and Charles sat in the same spot, simply staring into each other's eyes for an unreasonable amount of time.

"Would you like to go back to the fountain?" Charles propositioned with a tint of uneasiness.

"S-Sure, Charles" Erik babbled.  Charles' own name falling off of Erik's lips hit him like a freight train.

Fuck, I wish I could hear that more... "Need a hand, Schatz?" Charles looked up to see Erik standing above him, hand outstretched.  Charles grasped Erik's hand and found that Erik pulled him up much harder than Charles pulled Erik down. This resulted in both men's faces being much closer than platonic allowed.  Erik quickly turned to the side, a very subtle blush dusting his cheeks.  For a split second, Charles could feel Erik's breath on his lips, Erik's slight stubble scraping against his chin, Erik's cologne filling his nostrils. Charles was going to ride this high for months.

"C'mon, let's go" Erik spoke with a hint of nervousness. Charles, still spaced out and on cloud nine, mindlessly followed Erik to the fountain.

***

"And then he sees door..." Charles was sitting on the fountain next to Erik, listening to him go on a passionate tangent about the book he had been reading.  Listening is a bit generous though, rather, Erik's words were hitting Charles like water across a creek floor.  "And then-"

"Erik?" Charles asked, creating an abrupt end to Erik's sentence.

"Charles?" he mimicked.

"What do you think about my eyes?"

"What?" Erik panicked internally.

"You keep thinking about them."

"I-" Erik took a moment to compose himself, trying to calculate the weight of his words.

"Your eyes are...beautiful" Vorefreud his mind was screaming.

"What does that mean Erik? 'vorefreud'?" Erik's cheeks reddened.

"Uhm...it uh, it means..." Erik closed his eyes, and took a deep breath, his eyes now meeting Charles'.

"Vorefreud pretty much means the pleasure of waiting for something pleasurable."

"And why do my eyes bring that word to mind?" Charles said with a grin that he simply couldn't hide. Erik was silent, his eyes never leaving Charles'.  Erik slowly lurched closer to Charles, his left hand coming up to Charles clean-shaven jawline and his right coming to rest atop Charles' hand on the smooth stone of the fountain.

And just like that, Erik was kissing Charles and Charles was kissing Erik. Both men felt this heavy weight suddenly lift off of their shoulders.  The pining, the sexual tension, the unspoken feelings, all of that was paying off.  Erik noted that Charles' lips were unreasonably soft, and Charles found that Erik's lips were slightly chapped.  The kiss was not ravenous, rather a soft, passionate, admission of love.  Charles brought his hands up to Erik's sides, his thumbs slowly moving up and down against Erik's sweater.  Erik pulled away, but not before hitting Charles' bottom lip and dragging his teeth across it.  At this, Charles let out a sharp gasp, his eyes pointedly meeting Charles. 

Erik looked passionately exasperated, eyes boring into Charles.  Charles brought one of his hands up to touch his lips, rubbing across the part Erik had just bit.  Erik smiled at this, the widest smile Charles has ever seen from him. A slight chuckle escaped his lips. The urge to, once again, kiss Erik washed over Charles, who decided to listen to it.  He lunged forward, one hand clasped itself against the underside of Erik's chin and the other flew to the back of Erik's head, roughly gripping his hair. 

Erik cursed against Charles' mouth and kissed back, this time ravenously. Erik's hands found Charles' back, his arms looping underneath Charles'.  Erik nibbled on Charles' bottom lip, this time, making him groan.  Erik took this as an opening and gracefully slid his tongue into Charles' mouth.  This kiss was no longer an admission of their feelings, but now a declaration, an announcement.  Charles now pulled away, his forehead resting against Eriks'. 

"Erik," Charles softly spoke.

"Charles," Erik said with an audible smile.

"I'm glad you think so loudly."

"Me too."

WC: 1482

A/N: Thanks for reading, babes!

Prompt: "Do you plan on kissing me, or just staring at my lips like they're your dinner?"

Summary: just the gay mutant road trip. This is mostly a Drabble.

Charles lay sprawled out on the couch, headache buzzing at the back of his mind. Recruitment today was...well, a 'shit show' in no uncertain terms. Charles had been in the city for most of the day, which (for a telepath), meant a killer headache. Once the pain had finally subsided enough to form coherent thought, he'd realized what little food he actually had today, finally noticing the festering hunger by the pit of his stomach. Erik had just entered from the bathroom.

"Erik," Charles beckoned from the couch.

"Yes?" Erik turned to see Charles splayed out on the couch. He wore only a robe—motel issued, of course—and white briefs. Erik put massive amounts of effort into not looking at Charle's dick, which you could vaguely see the outline of.

"I'm hungry."

"And?" Erik raised a brow, now standing in front of Charles.

"Food. I want it." Erik smirked a little at the way Charles was acting. 'Cute' was the word bouncing around in his mind; he would never admit it though. Erik could see the desperation in Charles' eyes, almost a pout. He promptly decided that it was a matter of national importance to annoy the ever-loving shit out of Charles.

"What's the magic word?" Charles shifted to lying on the couch now, head propped up by one hand.

"Erik you're amazing, wonderful, handsome, and I love you?" Charles looked up to see a visibly nervous, startled, bumbling, blushing, Erik.

Okay, maybe it's a matter of local importance?

In reaction, Charles' mouth slightly opened, eyes wide, eyebrows raised for only a fraction of a second. Because, fuck, that's hot, but also, he can't know that.

Still flushed, Erik coughed and said "that will suffice." Erik then grabbed the hotel phone, calling down room service—while also, actively paying no mind to Charles. About a minute later, Charles piped up.

"I can flirt too, you know." Erik raised a brow and snapped to Charles' eyes.

"Yes, I've seen it in action. I often watch it with abject horror."

"You weren't staring at my ass in abject horror," Charles mumbled, breaking eye contact with Erik (who is, once again, a mess).

"No, I was staring at your ass with uncertain lust. Your ass isn't you flirting though, Charles. Your flirting is 'oh, hello attractive person, may I unzip your genes?" This time, Charles went red in the face, and let out a scoff.

"Erik, I purposefully shake my ass in front of you. I bite on the tip of my pen, I walk around half naked more often then normal, I leave the door open when I shower."

"I... I thought that was just you."

"It is, it's me when I'm around you"

Suddenly, a knock on the door breaks the trance both men were looped into. Erik shuffles around to open the door and mumbles a "thanks" to the worker. Charles loses himself in thought and Erik sifts through the food. He brings Charles his lava cake on the couch, where he sits down next to him with his coffee. Erik has to push around Charles' legs to make room. Once settled, Charles just places his legs on top of Erik's—both men sitting on opposite ends of the sofa, facing towards each other. Charles finally begins to dig into his lava cake, making aggressive eye contact with Erik. After a while, he shifts his fork around on the empty plate, still staring at Erik. Charles’ eyes landed on Erik’s lips; a shot of anticipation went up his spine. He’d thought about this many times before, and his thoughts began to spiral, replaying old fantasies. I don’t know where I want his lips first. Maybe we’d make out a bit first, then he’d kiss down my neck. Maybe he’d find that spot right behind my ear. Maybe I’d get to see his lips wrapped around my-

"Charles, are you still hungry?" Both men now sat 'pretzel style' still facing each other, when they got there remains a mystery. Charles now met Erik’s eyes, blood rushing up to his cheeks.

"No, I'm plenty full, why?" Charles leaned in slightly

"Okay, then do you plan on kissing me or just staring at my lips like they're your desert?"

Charles' eyes go dark with lust; his body stills. He nearly throws the plate down, muttering something along the lines of "bastard," and surges forward to meet Erik. Erik's hands frame the sides of Charles' face; Charles' hands grasp the older man's hair. Their noses were touching, breath burning each other's skin, mere inches away from kissing. Charles' eyes frantically searched Erik's, as if attempting to commit the moment to memory.

"Do you always play with your food, Charles?" Erik asked, and Charles could feel the question against his mouth. Charles let out a soft "fuck you" before finally closing the distance. As their lips met, they began to slowly devour one another. Their kiss was surprisingly... non-aggressive; sweet, even. Still full of passion, lust, and desire, but it was clear that neither of them were in a rush. Both men savored their (now) lover's taste. Erik let out a breathy laugh, and Charles did the same. Words left unsaid, declarations of love, and pure adoration were confessed against each other's lips.

Charles tugged against Erik's hair, and Erik groaned. Erik, in retaliation, shifted his hands down to Charles' ass, making him yelp. He lifted Charles closer, placing him atop his own lap. The couple broke apart for air, now panting in to each other's mouths. Erik's hands found Charles' face again, thumbs stroking softly.

“You taste like chocolate," Erik rasped, because honestly, he has no clue what to say. Charles placed a chaste kiss on the corner of Erik's mouth. He responded, in a similar tone, with "you taste like bastard."

Erik laughed, and oh god, that's one of Charles' favorite sounds.

"And, pray tell, what does bastard taste like, Charles?" Oh fuck, he's never said my name like that before.

"It tastes like the idiot who agreed to travel with me." Both men leaned back slightly, now looking into one another's eyes. "Tell me more about this idiot," Erik purred, one hand now roaming across Charles' neck. Charles released Erik's hair, and instead, wrapped his hands around Erik's arms.

"Well, he's stubborn," Charles began, Erik contenting with a mhm. Charles contemplated his next words, before trying again.

"He's stubborn, handsome… probably my best friend, and has these piercing, stormy eyes. He speaks five languages, and I swoon every time he speaks his native tongue. To be fair, I swoon every time he speaks period. His laugh is one of my favorite sounds in the world, and he's the only person I enjoy arguing with. He's a beautiful masterpiece of passion, even though he can't see it. Sometimes it scares me—how honest I am with him. He's very vocal about mutant rights, he's a wonderful addition to my life, and I think I might be a little bit in love with him." Erik's thumb stopped moving, and his body stilled.

"I think that idiot is a little bit in love with you too."

Please send me requests if you have any! I do !x reader’s too, I just haven’t had a good idea for one.

Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

Nas has been spitting nothing but facts this week

Someone: And then the punchline is a cute little mouse pun!

Absolutely deranged terf about to elevate this post to meme status at light speed: OH so you wanna FUCK THE MOUSE GIRL, you pervert?! This could have been cute if it weren’t so blatantly horny!! Obviously if the first thing I pictured was a hentai boobblob, that was rotten OP’s intent and has nothing to do with me. 

Like I can’t believe this is a subgenre of post now. For how long will it go on?

Close to You

Charles Xavier x non-mutant!reader

Word Count: 699

Summary: Charles Xavier just wants to get closer to his significant other.

~~~~~

Okay so I was up last night reading a bunch of x-men fanfics and this cute lil story came to me and I couldn’t just ignore it, so yeah I guess I write for fictional characters now 😂

~~~~~

Mutants. They weren’t a new thing, they’ve been around for ages. Some humans of course were afraid, as most are when they see something different. You on the other hand we’re quite familiar with the concept. Your father was a mutant, as was your sister. However it seemed the x-gene had skipped you. Some call it a good thing, others a bad thing. To you, it didn’t matter if you were a mutant or not, you were happy with just being who you were.

However, what you were grateful for, was meeting Charles Xavier. It was almost straight out of a movie. You had been out grocery shopping and humming a song you’ve been obsessed with, and from out of nowhere, there he came joining in with your little tune. You stopped, slightly embarrassed you were humming out loud, but he just mentioned how he loved that song. You two chatted about it, both sharing how it was such a feel good song. After that, you two conversed some more while continuing shopping and by the time you left the store you had each other’s contact information.

That had been a couple months ago. Now, you were quite familiar with the man as well as the other mutants he hung around with. And your face was no stranger to the others.

This particular date night you were spending in Charles’ room. You two were having a lovely evening, first filled with dinner and now you were enjoying one of your favorite movies. The lights were off and you were cuddled close to Charles on the floor. It was a simple yet romantic date.

A romantic scene had just come on screen and as if on cue, Charles tilted his head to look at you and picking up on his movement you turned to him. You two meet in the middle, bringing your lips together and as always, fireworks go off in your head.

You lean close, resting your palm on his chest, while he lovingly wraps his arms around you. With no space between you two, you kiss until you have to break apart to catch your breaths. Once apart he leans his head against yours, staring warmly into your eyes. He let out a content sigh, “I want to feel you closer,” he said.

The edge of your mouth went up, giggling at the statement, “we’re literally right against each other, how much closer can we get?” You joked.

There was silence on his end, spare for an uneasy expression on his face. “I want to enter your mind.”

Now this was new to you. You obviously knew of his powers but the thought of someone in your mind seemed slightly invasive. In the few months that you’ve been together with Charles, you’ve made it clear that you didn’t want him in your mind without consent and he’s respected this. But now, sitting here beside him, the concept was quite compelling. So finally after some thought you agreed.

The look on Charles’ face when you agreed, was ecstatic and you couldn’t help but mirror his expression. Before he began you had to ask, “is this going to hurt?” He shook his head, “no, I would never do anything to harm you.” He said and you had no doubt in your heart, so without further ado, he leaned his head against yours again and in the next moment you felt it. You shut your eyes as a slight throb filled your head before you felt a presence.

Once opening your eyes you saw Charles smiling at you, hi, he said cheekily.

Hi, you thought back. It was…odd sitting here and just thinking to each other, but it was actually quite…soothing.

So how’s this? Not scary at all, huh? He mused.

No. I like it, it’s like our own private meeting.

You two sat there, engaging in simple discussion. And you had to admit after time it felt warm and intimate having him in your head.

That night was by far the best night you’ve ever had. And although that date eventually had to come to an end, that wouldn’t be the last time Charles Xavier was in your head.

~~~~~

I hope you all liked this little imagine and have a wonderful day ✨☀️✨ 

STUFF NOBODY EVER TOLD YOU ABOUT TEETH (and how to take care of them if you are poor and/or depressed)

Contrary to what the US health industry would have you believe, your teeth are NOT luxury face bones. You need them. Healthy teeth are a cornerstone of good health in general for a lot of reasons. You can’t eat well without them. You need them to speak. And tooth bias is real.

This makes me very sad because I love teeth. I am not a dentist. I’m a biological anthropologist whose expertise is oral disease and the evolutionary anatomy of teeth. My dad’s an oral surgeon and I worked in his office from the tender and illegal age of 8 to the ripe old age of 18, which is when I went to college. At 12, I was assisting with the disposal of biowaste, aka packaging up the teeth to send them to dental schools. I live, breathe, sleep, and occasionally eat teeth. I found a human incisor on my floor this morning and wasn’t even surprised. I study how teeth go bad partly so that I can help living people protect the teeth they’ve got. It’s my goal with this post to teach you about a couple of different types of procedures and oral injuries, as well as what you can do to help keep your teeth functional. So in this post, what I am going to do is outline a few common things that can go wrong with your teeth, how they happen, and how to catch them before they get bad. A lot of the advice in this post is for people who maybe can’t get to the dentist for a cleaning and checkup every six months. This post is also gonna be LONG AS HELL and there is going to be a separate post called “luxury face bone hacks for the busy/broke/b’mentally ill” or something like that, so like. If you don’t like super long posts, just hit this one with a like and actually read through that one.

First, let’s talk about dental anatomy.

What Are Teeth?

Teeth are extremely cool. They’re these amazing little packages of dentin pulp, protected by enamel, nestled into the jaw like truffles in a box of chocolates, held in place with a teeny tiny ligament. They’re gorgeous– enamel is a beautiful substance, translucent and opalescent. Teeth are also extremely weird when you think about them. You have these weird not-bone things emerging from holes in your jawbones. They’re snapped into place with a biological bunjy cord and you can actually SPRAIN THEM if you put too much pressure on them.

Here are some important things to know about teeth!

First, the nerves in your teeth were never meant to be exposed to the air. They only process stimulus one way: pain. This means that when you get a cavity or do anything else that exposes the nerve, it is going to hurt like a bitch.

Your teeth may come loose! Usually they stay put and go back to normal in a day or two. Don’t panic. This is usually the result of you spraining your dental ligament that holds the tooth in place.

Root canals suck but they can prevent dental abscesses. Dental abscesses can kill you. If they spread and get into your sinuses, they can cross the blood/brain barrier and you will die. This doesn’t happen much any more, but in rare cases… it can.

The phrase “like pulling teeth” is a misnomer. Pulling teeth is extremely easy if you know what you’re doing. Extractions are usually a very simple procedure. What’s complicated is things like root canals and setting up implants, which, in the case of implants is the literal opposite of pulling teeth.

Pregnancy will fuck up your teeth because a.) the fetus is leaching your vital essence and other nutrients and b.) your hormones are telling a lot of ligaments in your body to loosen up to get ready to give birth. Sometimes wires get crossed and other ligaments at non-mobile joints get the loosen up message, too. Just be sure to keep up your dental hygiene regimen during pregnancy and you’ll be fine.

Your gum tissue isn’t just weird wet skin. It’s a mucous membrane that protects the mouth. It can get diseased and inflamed, so pay attention to it! Also, there’s a lot of blood vessels so if you poke yourself with something, you’ll bleed like a stuck pig for a minute. The kind of bleeding you should be worried about is prolonged bleeding, where you see blood welling up around your teeth for no apparent reason.

Now that you’ve been equipped with some fun facts, lets talk about diseases and procedures.

Braces: if you’re reading this, you probably don’t need them

First: Pediatric orthodontia is largely a scam. People who put standard braces on their child before that child has lost all of their baby teeth are stupid and causing their child needless pain because those teeth are going to fall out anyways and the alignment of the adult teeth was decided long, long ago. The kids who NEED orthodontic intervention are kids with bad crossbites/underbites/overbites. This requires specialized headgear most of the time and is more intense than the standard braces because they are made to solve a much bigger problem. The standard bracket-and-wire braces? Don’t put those on a child. They won’t help. Also, your kid doesn’t have their third molars yet, and those are the molars most likely to come in twisted anyways.

As an adult, you may want braces for cosmetic reasons or for comfort reasons. This is a CHOICE that is YOURS TO MAKE. If your dentist suggests you need braces, ask why. You don’t have to get them. Now,If you have certain kinds of dental overlap- like, your lateral incisors have been pushed behind your frontals- then yeah, you should get braces. But is it the end of the world if you don’t get braces? No.

Wisdom tooth removal: you might not need it

The human jaw is in a state of evolutionary mismatch right now. Basically, our last molar, the third molar, doesn’t come in until we’re an adult. Unfortunately, thanks to ten thousand years of agriculture, give or take a few millennia, we have much more gracile jaws than our ancestors. There’s not always enough room for it. Now, this isn’t true for everyone, because no two skulls are identical and all, but sometimes there is a condition where you really should get those suckers out. If they are impacted, or coming in sideways, they can push your other teeth out of alignment and cause jaw issues down the line. If they come up straight, don’t worry about it.

Cavities: you need to get these taken care of

Cavities are a pain in the ass and are honestly the main reason you should go to the dentist for checkups, so that they can take the x-ray of your mouth and see how any potential trouble zones are progressing. You should call a dentist and seek help if you notice pain that persists over three days, as that’s an indicator of something more serious than just a sprain.

Tooth Grinding: this is a problem

If you grind your teeth, your dentist may recommend a night guard. Actually listen to them about this. Grinding your teeth can cause major jaw alignment problems that are a pain to fix, so just bite the silicone and suck it up. Also maybe talk to a therapist if you can, because grinding can be a result of stress/anxiety.

Whitening your teeth: bad idea

First off, your teeth ain’t supposed to be white. Enamel is not white. Enamel is translucent and pearlescent, so its actual color is very hard to pin down. Your teeth are naturally going to look more ivory-colored over time. That’s just part of being human and having teeth. Embrace it. You are a badass omnivore with thirty-two gorgeous enamel teeth. They weren’t put in your mouth to look pretty, they were put in your mouth to feed you.

Second: Whitening your teeth weakens your enamel. Once your enamel’s gone, it ain’t coming back, baby. There are some gentler whitening methods, like whitening toothpaste, but these are only going to give you about one to two shades worth of improvement. If you have extremely stained teeth and you want to whiten them, make sure you talk to your dentist about all the risks. Unfortunately, there is no truly safe and effective home-style (read: not a million gotdang dollars) remedy for whitening teeth.

There are a few that are kicking around, but seriously, some of them are dangerous. Do NOT rub wood ash on your teeth. That’s lye. Don’t put that in your mouth. Do NOT use actual bleach, hair dye developer, or non-dental peroxide gel. They are poisonous. DO NOT PUT ACETONE ON YOUR TEETH i have seen this exactly once and the person came into my dad’s office with chemical burns on their gums and lips. I do NOT want to see this again.

It is a misconception that brushing your teeth keeps them looking white. Brushing your teeth removes plaque and biofilm, but those buildups don’t actually stain the enamel itself. Instead, really the only way to keep your teeth looking light is to pay attention to what you’re putting in your mouth. If you’re a tobacco user, vape! Tar is a major staining agent. Coffee’s also a major stainer, and the big trick there is to put a little milk in it. See, enamel staining doesn’t come from the color of the food. It comes from chemical properties. Acidic foods stain because acid damages enamel. Food with high levels of tannins, like coffee or tea, stain because the tannins change the PH of the mouth. So what you should do to avoid staining is balance your mouth PH by eating something basic after eating something acidic. Add a lil milk to your coffee or tea to weaken its acidity just a bit. Swish with water afterwards to help clear the acid. Don’t eat lemons or any other acidic food after drinking coffee. Why would you want to eat lemons after drinking coffee, anyways? Seems like a weird flavor combo to me.

And while we’re on the subject…

MOUTH CHEMISTRY

What’s in your mouth? Your teeth, your gums, your tongue, your spit… yeah, your spit. Saliva’s important. It’s probably THE most important thing in protecting your teeth because salivary production constantly washes the teeth, clearing off as much bad bacteria as possible. If you have an issue with saliva production, you should drink as much water as you can throughout the day, and get a bottle of dry mouth tabs for nighttime. Or daytime, if they don’t bother you. This is really important because dry mouth is a major side effect for a lot of drugs, like anti-depressants. This is actually a huge part of my research- the population I study used a natural painkiller, but in the end its use caused them more pain because the way it works, it decreases the efficacy of the salivary glands. They stop making sufficient saliva, the teeth dry out, the mouth PH changes, and the bacteria that destroy enamel go buckwild. If you can’t make your own spit, store bought is fine. Water for the day, tabs for the night.

Now, you might think that ok, acid isn’t great, let’s eat more basic foods to balance that out. You can, but it… isn’t great. Your saliva is naturally acidic for a reason, and if you neutralize it completely, that ALSO messes with your teeth. You should be drinking plain water as much as possible.

Seltzer and Soda

Some people think seltzer may hurt your teeth, but it really won’t… unless it’s citrus-flavored. Reason: citrus seltzer uses citric acid as a flavoring agent, and that messes with your teeth. So if you want to drink citrus seltzer, drink it with a meal or with food. Don’t sip it slow over the day.

Soda, on the other hand is a goddamn nightmare. The acid’s kind of a problem but the sugar… dear god the sugar. So. your teeth are covered in a bacterial biofilm. Some of these bacteria excrete acid, and that’s what gives you cavities. This is another part of my research- looking at how cavity prevalence changes as sweetening agents and sugar availability changes. As different carbohydrates enter the diet, populations’ disease responses change. I know more about this than probably anybody else in the world, and here is what I know: the best thing you can do for your teeth is stop drinking American soda.

It’s the corn, you guys. The chemical compounds in corn make the cavity-causing bacteria kick into overdrive. Sodas sweetened with high fructose corn syrup create the perfect environment for these dudes to excrete out a storm. Sugary beverages in general promote cavities, but NOTHING does it like sodas sweetened with high fructose corn syrup or any other corn byproduct. Try to limit your soda and juice consumption and if you can, make sure that when you do have them, you’re getting some food,too.

Other Acids

Ok this next part is going to deal with eating disorders. I’m going to be talking about some of the side effects of bulimia, what they can do to your teeth, and how you can take care of them. Eating disorders are serious business and I hope if you need this section you are in supportive recovery and have the love and support and resources you need. If you don’t want to read about what this can do to your teeth, scroll real quick until you seen the big green text.

If your teeth are in frequent contact with stomach acid, acid etching can be a real problem. Your enamel is tough but stomach acid is gnarly, and your gums don’t have that same protection. If you find yourself vomiting frequently, for whatever reason, try to swish water around in your mouth afterwards to help clean it out. I know that’s not the thing that’s likely on your mind after that, but a lot of what we’re doing here is damage control. I’m not here to judge you in the slightest. I’m just here to help you with your teeth.

Do not brush your teeth immediately after vomiting. The enamel is weaker, and you can cause even more damage by brushing too hard. Wait for at least an hour until after you’ve rinsed your mouth to avoid spreading the acid around.

You can also add some (1-2 tsp) baking soda to the water you rinse with, if you feel ok with doing that. It will taste gross and salty but it will help neutralize the acid. You just rinse with this, you don’t swallow.

ok that part is over

TOOTH HACKS

This is the funnest part, I get to tell you good ways to take care of your teeth that require very few spoons and very little money!

Brush ‘em twice a day. Once when you get up to clear out whatever happened the night before, and once before you fall asleep. You can brush more but you don’t have to. Use a soft-bristled brush and whatever toothpaste you like. If you hate mint, kid toothpaste that tastes like bubblegum or berries is totally fine!

Don’t want to get out of bed? totally fine. Use a finger toothbrush! these are designed for babies which is actually great because they are SUPER soft. If you have sensitive gums, these are going to be really helpful.

Don’t have access to a finger toothbrush? honest to god you can just dip your finger in water (though a mix of water and baking soda or water and salt is better) and brush your teeth with just your finger. The point of this isn’t to freshen your breath or anything, it’s just to get the biofilm off of your teeth and protect them.

Floss. This gets the biofilm out from between your teeth and promotes good gum health. Don’t just run it between the teeth- you need to floss below the gumline a little bit to help clean out plaque.

If you don’t have the spoons to do your whole mouth, floss between your molars if you can.

There’s lots of products that are great for people who can’t go through the whole flossing routine. Pre-threaded flossers are ideal because they’re designed for minimal effort and maximum gain. These are also killer for people with physical disabilities that affect hand dexterity.

If flossing hurts because you have sensitive gums, a water flosser can really help. This is more expensive but will last a very long time.

You can also get topical numbing gel that you can smear on your gums when flossing. Just be careful that you’re not flossing too hard because you can’t feel it. This brand is kind of expensive but it has a nice minty flavor. If you have a dollar and a way to get there, I saw Orajel at Dollar Tree yesterday… when I was buying a bunch of those pre-threaded flossers to throw in my car. I oughta do a Dollar Tree field trip to show you like, what products are available at the absolute cheapest in the US. Dollar Tree has a LOT of good dental options.

There’s a tiktok that says you can use a strand of hair to floss. This is a bad idea. A single strand of hair is likely to break and can cut into your gums. If you want to use hair as floss, you need to use a couple of strands twisted together. Go slow and gentle if you’re using hair. Obviously actual floss is better but this isn’t “perfect dental tips for perfect people,” this is “life sucks but your teeth don’t gotta.”

If you can’t floss or can’t brush, gargle. Put two tsp of baking soda in a glass of warm water. Swish it around, spit it out. If you can do that, you’ve helped clear out biofilm and bacterial waste.

Prioritize your teeth. You only get two sets and you lose the first one by the time you’re twelve. If you can only do one hygiene thing today, make it be your teeth.

Eat some pineapple. Bromelain, which is only found in pineapple, is super good at protecting enamel.

That’s… all I got for you now. Take care of your teeth!

Rush Hour bloopers.