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Arrangements

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugo x f!Reader

Warnings: SMUT. Minors DNI. TW: Cheating, Loveless Relationship, Verbal Abuse, Emotional Manipulation, Toxic Parents

Contains: Arrangement relationships, Dom/Sub dynamics, nicknames/pet names (Princess, Sir, Dummy -but in a loving way-), Oral (F Receiving), Begging, Rough-ish Sex, Some Spanks, Instructed Masturbation, Bakugo gets possessive...

Summary: Bakugo finds out your parents set you up in a quirk arrangement with Monoma of all people. Not long after, you and Bakugo enter a bit of an arrangement too, of the more fun variety. Things start up in your final year at UA but graduation doesn't put an end to things for you two.

WC: 4,837

A/N: This is basically smut with some plot to it. A vague sort of idea that I'm considering making into something more but I also could just let it end here. It's been in my head for quite some time and I needed it out lol. Characters start off at 18 and are 23 by the end of this piece.

The idea of dating and relationships ever appealed to Katsuki Bakugo. Even in high school, he considered it all to be a distraction, something that took focus away from his main goal in life of being the number one hero. It was never that he couldn't date, it was simply he didn't want to.

And then there was you. Because you were different. Because he couldn't actually have you.

In the exact same classes for three years, sitting just a row away from him, you seemed like just another ordinary student, that's what he thought at least. You had a strong quirk that you had very good control over and were good with course work too. It wasn't until third year that his impression changed.

You'd become friends with Kirishima, close friends, to the point whispers started about the two of you being a thing. But, Bakugo was never one for rumors, he paid them no mind. What did piss him off was what he heard after class one fall afternoon.

"You're not better than me, never forget that, Y/N." It was Monoma, "Don't bother getting close with anyone in that damn class, not that rock for brains idiot especially. It'll be bad for our image." Bakugo stayed hidden but he heard the shuffling of fabric and you gasp. "You're mine, remember that."

Another shuffle before a single set of footsteps casually went off down the hall.

He shouldn't have care, he didn't really know why he did. But, you're mine, what did that even mean? Were you dating him? You acted like you despised Monoma just as much of the rest of the class did...

Then Bakugo heard it, just a single sob. Only one. He'd never heard you cry before, hadn't seen it either and you'd been through a lot, your entire class had.

He rounded the corner without thinking about it and you hadn't even noticed him. Head hung low, your shirt had come untucked from your skirt and the collar was rumbled.

It might have been a slow process but, Bakugo had grown a bit in the last three years. Enough that he offered you a hand, "Come on." You looked up at him with startled eyes, "Don't think you wanna have a break down in the hallway. So come on."

You took up your bag and grabbed his hand, letting him lead you into an empty classroom. "The fuck was that about?"

"N-no one at school knows... 'Sept Kiri does."

Bakugo was a little surprised the redhead was able to keep a secret like this, especially from him. "That you're dating that pretentious jack ass?"

"'S not that exactly."

"Then what is it exactly?"

Your hands strangled the strap of your bag, unable to make eye contact with him. The fuck was goin' on? You were usually so confident, lighthearted, this wasn't anything like you.

He grabbed your hands. "Talk, Y/N. If he's forcin' you into something I'll blow his ass to pieces-"

"No, you've got it sorta wrong. It's not Monoma. It-it's our families. We're in a quirk arrangement. We're supposed to be married, you know, all that stuff..."

"What are you, a damn princess?" A quirk marriage? Those were still a thing? How fucking archaic. Todoroki was the product of one but he didn't actually think people still used them.

"Very funny. Monoma, he just, he wants our image to be spotless. Completely perfect. And that means nothing can be assumed about either one of us being with anyone prior to our own time. We aren't expected to marry until we're 25, thankfully." You let out a bit of a chuckle. "If he found out I was in here alone with you though, ha, he'd have a fit! Our families probably would too."

"So, you're not supposed to be involved with anyone? Either of you?" He had to clarify and sure enough, you nodded your head. "Tsk, he probably shouldn't have been makin out with fuckin' horns then."

You choked. "A-Ashido?"

"Wha? Fuck no! And not shitty hair either! I mean the one in class B!"

He watched to color slowly drain from your face. "How do you know?"

"Saw 'em myself. Probably shouldn't try to fuck in the locker room if he wants to not be caught."

Damn. You looked like you were about to pass out. Maybe he should have told you when you had a chair to fall into. But, as quickly as it had come, it passed. You were, holy shit, you were hugging him!

"Thank you! Bakugo, you have no idea how great this is! Thank you! I might be able to get out of this now!"

There was no time for him to even react before you were pulling away and running out the door.

>>><<<

The noose around your neck, the same one that had been there since were ten years old, tightened ever more on the train ride back from your parents.

You begged them to listen. Begged them to take Monoma's actions more seriously but they didn't care. It wasn't you that messed up. It wasn't their daughter out sleeping around. You had to be loyal. You had to be perfect.

And you were so done with being perfect.

But you couldn't leave the arrangement either. They made it clear that if you did, they'd just simply promise your little sister off to Monoma's brother instead and there was no way in hell you were pushing this on your sweet baby sister.

>>><<<

It was after ten when you got back to the dorms. You knew he'd been in his room, maybe even asleep, but you didn't care. You were livid. And there was exactly one person you knew who could match your level of anger.

"Train with me." You insisted when Bakugo opened his door. He was in sweats and a tank top but he didn't look drowsy.

"No."

"Bakugo."

"Y/N."

You folded your arms over your chest. Not in the mood. "Fine, fuckin whatever. I'll go get Kiri then..."

You already started walked to the neighboring room but Bakugo leaned on his door frame. "Shitty hair's gonna make you talk about it."

"You're probably right."

"You don't look like you wanna talk."

"I don't want to talk. I wanna kick someone's ass!"

Bakugo stepped out of his room. "And you thought to ask me? You think you can kick my ass?"

"I've done it before."

It wasn't easy by any means to best Bakugo, but you weren't looking for an easy fight. You didn't want someone to coddle you or try to make you feel better right now. If you did, you would have gone straight for Kirishima.

He stood in front of you now, hands on his hips, looking down with piercing red eyes. "Fine. Training yard. Ten minutes. No quirks though. Beat me without yours."

Now that was going to be challenging but you accepted.

You hadn't wasted any time going out to the yard. Slipping by the rest of your classmates to avoid any questions. Bakugo was right on time, hands in his pockets look about as disinterested as he usually did.

"I'm only doin' this on one condition."

"And what's that?"

"If I pin you three times, you gotta tell me what happened when you ran off."

"What if I pin you three times? Then what?"

"Whatever you want."

Whatever you wanted? That was a lot of power but then you realized, he didn't think there was any way you would win.

"Fine. I wanna kiss you. No, no no. I wanna make out with you, yeah." You'd get even with Monoma. And with someone, he hated no less.

Bakugo shrugged as if it was no big deal, but it was obvious the slight widening of his pupils, you'd caught him off guard.

"Fine by me, Princess. Three pins for a win. No quirks."

"Deal."

You each took your stance, and you weren't waiting any longer. Temper boiled over and you charged at him but all he did was dodge out of the way. Dodge and then grab you by the back of the shirt before you could spin around. With a strong thrust, he had your back slammed into the ground.

Before you could even think about scrambling away, he had both your wrists pinned above your head and shins over both ankles.

"Fighting angry doesn't work for you, Princess. Gotta use that damn brain of yours."

You writhed and tried to thrust your hips into a bridge but his grip was too good. As soon as the eight-count was up, he returned to his starting spot without another word.

Letting him come for you was the easiest way to get Bakugo on the floor. Out-smarting him was another way to throw him off his game. You shook off the rage from your parents. Exhaled slowly, and dropped back into your stance.

This time, he came for you. Throwing two quick punches in succession and then a third landed against your rips. You recovered quickly by ducking slow and working his torso, aiming for the points you remembered Kirishima hitting him during training in class earlier that day. They had to still be sore.

It might have been a cheap way to play but it was effective. You landed three hits and a kick before he grabbed your ankle in mid-air, sneering for just a second and then flipping you back on the ground. But, you wouldn't be taken so easily this time.

Bakugo's shirt had ridden up and you could see the purplish bruise along his right side. Before he could trap your legs, you wound them around his middle, squeezing tightly, "Fuck." He bit out but didn't relent.

Tight your snared your legs and tighter he gripped your wrists. You were hurting him, you had to be but you wouldn't give in. You had payback to win and you were going to use Bakugo to get it. He gave out, tipping forward and you jerked your wrists hard using his sweat-slicked hands to your advantage and slipping free.

A knee to his lower back, you pulled his arm behind him and started the count while he chuckled. "That's more like it."

You worked his injuries to earn you another point. Tougher a second time since he picked on your weak leg where Sero had grabbed you earlier making you fall.

The fourth match went to him. Bakugo no longer playing around, he went right for the kill as if to remind you how easily you were to best. He sprinted forward and went for your thighs. Lifting you in the air and then taking you down to the ground in one swift motion. Counting down while you struggled, sweat dripping off his nose and mingling with your own.

You were two for two. The next match would decide it.

One more time, you stood apart from each other. You weren't ready to talk about it. You weren't ready to explain how your parents practically gave Monoma permission to do what and who he pleased while you had to be loyal and faithful for the rest of your damn life. No. You just wanted to win. And have Bakugo kiss you until you forgot about everything.

That was why you ran for him, sliding low at the last second between sturdy legs and kicked with everything you had. He went down to his knees and you tried tackling him forward but he reached behind him, finding a good hold, and hauled you over his shoulder.

The world spun and then slammed to a halt leaving you looking up at a sweaty, smirking Bakugo.

Cocky bastard.

You flipped your legs up hooking him in your hold and finally twisting until he was back down. "Got you now." You had him between your thighs while his hands helplessly pulled against you for the remaining countdown.

Your legs relaxed and Bakugo gasped, resting his head against the fat of your thigh while you both caught your breath.

"You fuckin' won."

"Damn right I did. Where's my prize, blasty pants?"

For a moment, you wondered if he was gonna back out. Scoff and walk off. You wouldn't have really blamed him because it wasn't like you were gonna force him into something he didn't want... you knew exactly what that was like and you wouldn't have wished that upon anyone.

He rolled off you, sat by your side. "That's really what you want?"

You nodded. "Don'tcha wanna ask someone else?"

"Nope. I'm askin' you."

"ButIhaven'tkissedanyonebefore."

"Excuse me? I think you might have sneezed."

Bakugo shoved your shoulder before repeating, "I've never kissed anyone. I'm sure I'd be good at it! Don't worry about that! But, if you wanted someone, you know, who knows..."

You broke out laughing. "I've only kissed Monoma. My expectations aren't exactly sky-high." Your fingers brushed against his in the dirt. Both of you looked a wreck but that didn't stop Bakugo from pressing his lips against yours with entirely too much force making your teeth clash when he landed on top of you.

"It's not a competition, Bakugo."

"Yeah, it is." He grumbled with his lips still on yours. "I gotta be better than him."

"Then you gotta relax." You placed a kiss on his cheek, and then his jaw, and a soft one against his lips, "See? Already better."

He was a fast learner. Actually listened to what you liked and applied it quickly. Bakugo grew bolder as the minutes passed, fingers warm on your skin when he ventured under your shirt and kisses wandering down your neck. He also learned he like you kissing the junction of his neck, the way you sucked at the skin there.

There were breathy little gasps he could get you to make and you sounded so soft for him.

You could have stayed there all night, the comfortable weight of him on top of you but any later and Iida was gonna send a search party.

You left the training yard with him, parted ways to shower, and then go off to your rooms as if nothing had happened. But, Bakugo laid atop his sheets unable to stop his mind from reeling. He pulled up your contact info on his phone and opened a new message.

You: If you need someone to take out your frustrations on, don't bother askin' shitty hair.

A response came in minutes later,

Y/N: I'll come to you first.

And you did. For the next five years...

>>><<<

Sneaking around was half the fun. Wigs, pretty dresses, and fancy suits. Hotel rooms booked under different names, in different cities. You and Bakugo grew together, we're closer than you and Monoma had ever been!

You'd fallen in love with a man you could never have but you didn't care.

Every time Monoma was caught with a new woman or tried belittling you, you remembered Bakugo. And tonight was no different.

You normally tried to plan meetups away from personal residences, it was easier that way but tonight had been especially bad.

You see, a man had asked for your number after you saved his daughter. He explained buying you a coffee was the very least he could do to show his gratitude. And you stupidly accepted his offer.

"That's why you became a hero, isn't it? Flirt and get guys to notice you because you need all that attention, don't you? You're never going to get it. Not from them. Not anyone. Not ever. Hell, I'm not even going to give it to you." His face inched closer, "Unless you beg me for it. Bet you wouldn't be so annoying if you were on your damn knees for me."

You closed your eyes while he spat his venom, let him rant until his words ran out and he left you outside the agency you worked for. Izuku asked if you were alright when you walked back in the office and you painted on your happy face, assuring him everything was fine before going to change into civilian clothes.

But, you didn't go home. You drove straight to Bakugo's place, his penthouse that he absolutely loved that overlooked the shining city lights.

You: I'm outside. I need you.

Blasty: You know the code.

He never gave you crap about coming over no matter how risky it was. He'd given you the code for the employee's entrance to his building and the service elevator. And, just like always, he was waiting for you the very moment you stepped off.

You sprung on him, leaving him to stumble backward with you in his arms until his back hit the wall. Fingers running up his front until you found the little silver zipper of his hoodie and pulled it down, reveling in the warmth of his skin, littered with scars of battles pasted underneath.

"Damn, Princess, what'd he do this time?"

He brushed your hair back meaning to kiss your neck but instead saw the wet streaks along your cheeks. "Seriously, Y/N, what'd he do?"

There was no use hiding it from him, Bakugo wouldn't let this go any further until you told him at least a hint of the truth. "Told me I'd never get attention from anyone, not unless I begged."

It'd become almost too easy to tell him the truth of things. He never pried but would talk if that's what you wanted. Usually, though, he was good at taking Monoma's shitty words and turning them into something so much better.

Rough thumbs cleared away your angry tears. "We'll see about that." He spun so you were pinned between his body and the wall. Bakugo's hand ghosted over your leg, dipping under your skirt to find the thin panties you wore.

"'M gonna make you wanna beg for me," A hard yank, and they were gone, Bakugo on his knees before you right in the entryway nudging your legs further and further apart to accommodate him, pressing wet kisses against soft flesh. "Beg for me to start," He shoved up your skirt and vanished under it, "Beg for more," Warm breath fanned out over you making your legs squeeze around his head, "Beg me until you just can't take it anymore."

"P-please." The pitiful plea fell from your lips. Because if it was Bakugo, you'd gladly beg. He put on a tough exterior, had many layers to break through, but he'd never leave you anything less than completely satisfied.

He nipped at your thigh, "Do better."

"Katsuki, please. I need it so bad. I need you. I wanna feel you, please, can I have you?"

"Good girl." You felt his words reverberate against your core just before his tongue rolled against your clit.

Five years gave the two of you a lot of time to get good at many things together, learning what the other likes, coming a long way from late-night, sloppy makeout sessions in the training yard.

Bakugo could have you coming undone in a matter of minutes now or he could drag it out of you for hours. And, judging by the slow, methodical licks he was giving you, this wasn't going to be a quick evening.

You whining when he resumed kissing your inner thighs, leaving you breathless and wanting so much more from him. "But why, Katsukiii, why'd you stop?"

"You stopped begging. Show me how needy you are and maybe I'll keep going."

There was no maybe about it. He didn't have all the power here. You grabbed the back of his head, a fist full of that light blonde hair, kept shorter now than in high school and pulled him from under your skirt so he'd look up at you. The right words were all Bakugo needed to lose control.

"Please, sir, I need you to make me cum. I need you to make me forget his name. I don't wanna remember it. Please, please, sir, fuck me until I can't remember Monoma, only you."

Slowly he stood until he was looking over you with a wicked snarl. "What's my fuckin' rule, Princess?"

You had to fight back a smile. One word. Just one name and he was all fired up. "I- I'm really sorry!"

You weren't, not at all.

"No one fuckin' says his name in my house. Damn, I really am gonna have to fuck you senseless, aren't I? Bed. Now."

Bakugo landed a smack right on your ass as you made a b-line right for his bedroom.

And, just as it did every single time you made your way into his private room, you gravitated to the floor to ceiling glass windows. Once you'd seen it, there was no doubt in your mind why Bakugo loved this place as much as he did. It took your breath away every single time.

You'd dreamed about him screwing you against the glass or sucking him off on the balcony beyond it but the risk of being caught had always been too great, even this high up.

"I said bed." His voice was low in your ear while he took your jacket off your shoulders. "Better listen."

He pulled your blouse up and over your head, removed your bra all before tugging his own pants down just enough to free his half-hardened cock.

Gods, you knew how it felt inside you, every vein and that upward tilt he had, it had you clenching at the very thought. "You want my cock? You know what to do."

He wanted a show and you'd give him one. One hand running down your body while the other stopped to tease your pebbled nipple. He sat in one of the highback chairs meant for TV watching after he spun it around. Legs stretched out while he gave himself slow, languid strokes.

Red eyes roamed your body. The way your fingers teased little circles before slipping one inside, a soft sigh going straight to his cock. Picking up the place, he watched the way you pinched and pulled at your nipples. You had every ounce of his attention.

"Remember his name?"

"Yes, sir."

"Add another finger then."

You did as you were told.

"Curl 'em up inside you. You can push them deeper than that."

Moans fell from your lips more freely, spurring him on further.

"That's it, princess. Still remember?"

"Yes, sir, I think I need your help, sir."

"I am helping. Add another. And don't stop messing with that pretty clit either."

Your third finger slid inside, pumping them in and out while your wetness gathered between your thighs. Your hips were rocking, abandoning your tits so your other hand could rub on your clit.

Higher you climbed, "Faster now," you couldn't even keep your eyes open to watch Bakugo stroke his fully erect cock anymore but damn did you wanna feel it.

"Please, sir, I need you!"

"'Course you do," The chair creaked and then you felt quirk-warmed hands on your legs, "Move. Both hands on your tits, now." Two of his own fingers filled you up just as much as three of yours had felt. Just longer, able to push in deeper, making your back arch up off the bed, head going fuzzy when his tongue found you again.

Harder you squeezed your chest, hips wiggling, desperate to reach your release. "Remember?" He grunted from between your legs.

A strangled, mhm, was all you could manage being so close. Crying when he added another thick digit with the others but it was exactly what you needed.

Wet fingers slid out just as you started to shake, both his hands slammed your thighs down on the bed, spread wide, while his tongue took you through your orgasm.

"And now?"

"Wha?"You mumbled still coming back down.

"Now we're getting somewhere."

Before you had a chance to fully calm down, Bakugo yanked you to the edge of the bed. Spinning you onto your stomach with ass perked up in the air. Smacking it just a little before taking his tip and running it against your still dripping folds.

You pushed back wanting more but he pulled himself away, "Ah-ah, what's his stupid fuckin name?"

"Um, Mon-"

Bakugo entered you with a single hard thrust, pulling out completely while you gasped. "But-But you asked!"

"Because I need to know-" Another thrust, "Just how hard-" Another, "I gotta go!"

His grip on your hips was bruising, bring your ass back, smacking against him each and every time until it was his name you were moaning. "Yeah, hah, that's it, princess. My fuckin' name. Not his."

He bent over top of you, hand against the back of your neck pinning you down. Bakugo picked up the pace, balls slapping against you with a steady rhythm.

"K-Kat Katsuki! Fuck, more, more, please. Yes, sir, please!"

He twitched inside and you kept begging. Anything to get more of him. His grip on your neck tightened and pulled you up, back against him while he fucked deeper. You were facing the windows, your reflection in the glass with tits bouncing and Bakugo's arm wrapped around your middle. His face buried in your neck.

"Want them to see you, don'tcha?" He knew exactly what you wanted, you'd talked about it enough, "Yeah, mmm, squeeze me tighter, naughty fuckin' woman!" You cam again at the thought of the cool glass on your tits, how it'd contrast with the very heat of him. "Fuck!"

He shoved you back down, relentless now, "Fucking hell, Kats, yes!" Tiny explosions released against your shoulders just seconds before he shot ropes inside of you.

Bakugo carefully laid you flat on your stomach, hips trusting lazily as he worked every last drop into you. He kissed between your shoulder blades and then each red mark he left on your shoulders. One at the center of your back, another just above your tailbone, and finally a playful smack of your ass before he pulled out.

"Remember?" He muttered, kissing below your ear.

"Nu-uh." Of course you did but Monoma was now in some very distant part of your mind. Completely overtaken by Bakugo.

"Good." He flipped you over and scooped you up into his arms, not giving a single damn about your combined releases currently leaking out of you and onto him.

He held you in his arms, while the bath water filled. Waiting for it to be warm enough to set you inside. When he finally did, you gave him a questioning look, why wasn't he joining you like he usually did and instead just using a washcloth.

"Dinner." He stated plainly.

"I haven't eaten yet."

"Yeah, I know. I heard your fuckin' stomach growling when I was eating you out." He tossed the soiled rag into the hamper.

"Well, that's embarrassing."

Bakugo placed a kiss on the crown of your head, "No, it's just you, you dummy. Now, sit here, fill it up with some bubbles or whatever and I'll come get ya when it's ready."

"Yes, sir!" You gave a mock salute but he cocked a slender blonde brow.

"Call me that again and dinner's gonna fuckin' wait."

You smiled, seriously considering it, but you did need food and Bakugo was the best cook you knew. "Maybe for dessert."

"Dummy..." He left with a laugh.

>>><<<

Bakugo had started food and changed the bedsheets while he heard you humming quietly to yourself in the bathroom. Ignoring the tug in his chest, reminding him how much he actually liked having you in his space no matter how much he tried denying it.

He returned to the food now sizzling in its pan when his phone rang.

"What's up, Shitty Hair?"

"Is Y/N with you! Been trying to call her but she's not answering me!"

Kirishima was the only person who knew yours and Bakugo's relationship was more than friends.

"Yeah. She's in the bath, why?"

"Put on the fuckin' news, now!"

"Fuckin' hell. What's so damn important! I'm tryin' to make some damn dinner..." He complained while he found the remote and flipped to one of the news stations.

"Just do it! And get Y/N too!"

He turned up the volume so he could hear what the reporter with yellow eyes was saying, "... It is official, legislation has just passed a law that quirk arrangements going forward that do not have both parties explicit consent will be void! Both parties must still be a minimum age of 25 to marry but now both must have verbal and written consent. If parents or guardians are found to be forcing their children into these relationships, forging documentation, and or tampering with the arrangement in any way, the penalty will be a minimum of 15 years jail time and..."

Bakugo dropped his phone with Kirishima still on the line.

You were free. They had nothing over you anymore. The one person he wanted that he was sure he could never fully have was free.

He sprinted for the bathroom calling your name.

"Let me grow old with you and I promise to be wiser," took my whole damn breath away 🫠 got me melting.

Uh-oh! I think you're holding the heart of mine!

Synopsis ! You should have known better than to love someone so cruel.

Content and warning: Ao'nung x Reader! Ao'nung is a mean IDIOT, his friends too. BULLIES >:[ he comes around tho (2.6k words of angst to comfort hahah)

You’ve been in love with Ao’nung since you were little kids, always trailing behind like a second shadow and mimicking even the smallest gestures. To you, he was the sun; so bright and achingly alluring, but like the sun, he was cruel— oh so cruel. He’d burn you every chance he gets and you’d take it willingly, grateful for even the slightest touch of warmth. 

You never took it to heart. Never. This was a challenge that you’ve accepted with great pride thinking that you could crack his mean demeanor; you were convinced that the reason he had this seemingly tough exterior was because he was future clan leader— of course he needed to be strong. It would be bad for his image to falter, let alone to a girl who held no title whatsoever. You were nobody. 

Tsireya would say otherwise. though. She was your number one supporter; always urging you to do better and to continue with your cute antics towards his brother. She knows you’d be great for him— heck, you were the only one she deemed suitable for Ao’nung. How could she not think so? You were a great hunter, always quick on your feet and vigilant. On top of that, you were resilient. You never knew when to give up. 

You were believed to have been loved, regardless of his very actions. You remember crying to Tsireya one afternoon, showing her the graze on your forearm. The sight of it alarmed her— anything bloodied, even in the smallest of form would worry any kid so she rushed you to her mother. 

Ronal cooed while she tended to your wound and you unconsciously poured your heart out about how Ao’nung had pushed you harshly down the sand, scraping your skin on scattered rocks in the process. His friends had laughed at you, pointing their fingers to your fragile form, cowering. 

“Maybe he’s being aggressive because he likes you back!” Tsireya reasons, oblivious to what really was the case— but you were only kids, rough housing and games like these were normal so you didn’t know any better either. You wiped your runny nose and took a deep breath. 

“You really think so?” and still you were hopeful. 

Tsireya nodded enthusiastically, taking your hands near her chest. Ronal softly smiled, rubbing your back in soothing circles. “I’m sorry about Ao’nung, ma __. I’ll be sure to give him a good scolding later when he gets home.”

“And who knows, maybe he does like you. Boys just don’t like to talk about their feelings.” What Ronal said only burned your hopes higher— encouraging your heart to push for a longer run.

It wasn’t always like this. You and him were best of friends, inseparable and kind. You were a trio along with Tsireya and you absolutely loved spending time with them; swimming, exploring the ocean– being kids. Ever since, you knew he was the one, almost like it was the great mother’s own will. The feelings blossomed every spent time with him and you cherished it wholeheartedly. 

“You should eat plenty so that you grow up to be strong, Ao’nung!” You’d force bits of fish near his lips, urging him to open up. He was throwing a tantrum after being scolded by Ronal, arms tightly crossed and refusing to eat anything. “I don’t want a lanky mate!”

And of course it had been a joke. You’d love him regardless of what he looked like and you knew it, but it was so forward of you and it would always catch him off guard. His cheeks would burn bright red and he’d turn into a stuttering mess. 

“Mate?” He asked incredulously which you returned with an eager nod. ”That’s grown up talk! Don’t say things like that until we’re older.” 

“You’re gonna have so many pretty children!” Tsireya would comment and you both would squeal, oblivious to the frantic young boy. 

After he had started to train, Ao’nung was naturally introduced to other warriors. He fit in perfectly. As much as you were happy for him, that was also when things took a turn and before you know it, it was only you and Tsireya left. 

Ao’nung thought that what you had for him would be harmless– a silly crush your young heart couldn’t comprehend yet, but you had now grown into a fine woman and the said love had developed just as much. The people weren’t blind to see how you’ve matured so beautifully– but the men your age knew better than to even try to talk to you. Everyone knew you had eyes for Ao’nung and him only, and the way he grew himself had women dote for him. 

It drove him crazy; the sly comments, the lingering touch, the gifts– your very presence. He didn’t know how to handle it, so when his heart beat turned frantic everytime, he’d call it frustration. How his face would burn, how his chest would tighten. Ao’nung was conflicted and his mother was right– boys don’t like to talk about their feelings and he never will. 

He’d push you away harshly. Snapping the countless bracelets you’ve carefully crafted for him, embarrassing you regardless of eyes watching, and belittled you any chance he gets. Every woman would cry there and then, immediately running off in embarrassment– but you stayed everytime and it infuriated him. Ao’nung couldn’t shake you off, even if you weren’t around. You were everywhere he went, even in dreams. 

You sat with him as he sharpened his fishing spear, not even sparing a glance at your presence. “Oel ngati kameie, Ao’nung.” 

The silence didn’t falter you. In fact, it was inviting you to continue. You were surprised he hadn’t even got up to leave so you gratefully took the opportunity and handed him a present wrapped in leaves. He dropped his weapon and begrudgingly took it, opening it in one go. 

It was a pretty tie with various beads along the strings. His hair was sometimes unruly and he disliked braiding it, so you figured you’d make him something to wear. For a minute, he stared, admiring it– but the way your smile grew every second had embarrassed him. Ao’nung snickered, throwing it carelessly on the ground and you immediately scrambled to look for it.

“I’m not interested.” He emphasized every word as if he tried to make you understand, harshly kicking the sand towards your kneeling body. Ao’nung left and you could only stare with a sigh.  

So maybe this time, you were to blame. After all the years he’d push you away, embarrass you in front of his friends, you were still the same stupid shell of a girl who thought he had finally changed– he had finally cracked and you were confident. It was afternoon when they approached you, asking for your presence while they hunted further the reefs. Ao’nung had asked you– Ao’nung.

Nothing else mattered, not even the obvious snickers from the background. You nodded enthusiastically, tripping on your heels as you hurriedly ran back home to get ready. They had already mounted their Ilu when you returned and without a word, you followed them. 

So maybe this time, you were to blame. You should’ve known better than to be so trusting– so gullible and naive. Night was approaching quickly and Ao’nung or any of his friends were nowhere to be seen. The thrashing waves would unmercifully shove your small body on the very rock that helped you keep afloat, its harsh and sharp edges scratching your skin. The ocean was reprimanding you, you’ve concluded after trying to hold on for hours– the blame was yours and yours only. Stupid, stupid girl.

They had left you and this time, you knew well enough it had been their intention. 

They were laughing back at shore, applauding themselves for a successful prank. You were to return later all disheartened and the sight would be the cherry on top, but Ao’nung grew restless every minute. This was wrong and he knew that well. 

His friends had already bid their goodbyes but he stood there, waiting. He started to walk in circles while fidgeting his fingers– something was wrong. Perhaps it was a sibling thing for Tsireya to start feeling uneasy as well, so she excused herself from her mother and seeked for his brother. It wasn’t hard to find him and when she did, her panic only worsened as she approached him. 

“What’s wrong, brother?” Tsireya asked, eyebrows knitted together. 

“__” He immediately answered, “__ is outside the reef.”

Tonowari and a few warriors immediately ventured out to search for you. Tsireya couldn't even be enraged at his brother as she was busy worrying herself– but Ronal was a different case. She had been biting his ear off the very moment he told her what happened but Ao’nung easily tuned her out, only hearing his rapid heartbeat. 

It felt like forever, but the moment his father had returned, he ran towards him straight away. There you were, a warrior propping you up gently as you limped. You were bloodied and out of breath– he winced at the cuts coating your skin. Before he could even approach you, you had flinched. 

The look you gave him made him shudder. It was so unlike you to look at him differently, so empty and void of any admiration. Suddenly, his throat was awfully parched and he was entirely unmoving– all the apologies that were begging to be spat out from the tip of his tongue, gone. You stood there, staring with your teary doe eyes. 

His presence made you nauseous and you would’ve cowered in instinct, if not for the warrior’s hold on your shoulders. You could’ve died– you almost did; you were already slipping and numb.

Your parents had immediately ran to you, crying as they held you near. They rushed your weary body to Ronal in a heartbeat. The clan spoke in whispers as Tonowari dispersed the growing crowd. 

Ao’nung could only watch at your retreating figure. He visibly gulped. This was it, he thought, this was what he wished for. 

And it had only hurt him terribly.

He stayed near the hut regardless and heard how you whimpered– how you’d sniffle and cry. The paste burned against your skin and you couldn’t help but squirm. You felt so ugly, so humiliated and little. 

Ronal finally walks out, the sound of the flap waking Ao’nung’s drowsy state. “Mother, how is she?” He receives only a scornful glare as she walks past him. 

“Mother, please.” 

“I am deeply disappointed in you, Ao’nung” She said, clearly holding back. The tsahik sighed, “but for her sake, I will save you from any more scolding. It is what she asks for.” 

And it was so like you to think of him before yourself. It applied more pressure on his already beaten heart and he could only drop his head in shame. This was his fault and he had to face the consequences he so begged for all these years– so where did this sickening desire to hold you close come from? It was bittersweet on his tongue and no water could get rid of the taste. 

“I know that look, brother.” Tsireya didn’t have to glance to see his troubled state. It’s been days– no, weeks. He couldn’t get to you; skilfully blending in with your surroundings and out his sight, scurrying quickly towards another direction– it was clear you wanted nothing to do with him. 

It pained him– absolutely shattered him to pieces. 

“I can’t reach her, Tsireya.” His frown deepens as he frustratingly tugged on his hair. 

“And you will never again!” Ao’nung flinched. As much as Tsireya enjoyed the torment of his brother, she still rooted for the both of you– still standing firm with the fact that you’d do good for him, but she thought of you and knew you also deserved better. With a dejected sigh, she whispers,  “If.. you don’t hurry.” 

“Her hideout. Now. Go make things right.” Tsireya hoped she was doing the right thing.

Ao’nung darted in a heartbeat– disrupting the busy clan and accidentally bumping into them. He couldn’t waste any time anymore, he had to get to you or else he’d forever hold his peace. Every step he took was an image of you with someone else; someone else willing to make you happy, someone else to be your mate. 

And he hated that. It only fueled him to go faster, eventually reaching a pond surrounded by trees. The place was hidden and only the three of you knew where it was located– it was your safe place.

There you were, relaxed and unknowing. It was cruel like this; for Eywa to strikingly illustrate you in a different light– in a different point of view, or perhaps it had never changed and he just chose to never look at you the way he’s staring now. You were absolutely beautiful, basking in the glow of the dusk. The water swayed you gently and the calm on your face was inviting. 

This was his only chance. 

Ao’nung approached you, allowing the water to swallow him near you. He called out your name in a whisper and you immediately turned to him in surprise. Before he could even get another word out, you tried to hoist yourself up to escape, but he was quick to grab your wrist. 

You hissed in return, his touch burning the healing cuts on your skin. “You don’t get to be sorry.” 

You had turned your back on him and only then did he see the same tie that you tried to give him around your hair. It was gut-wrenching– the taste of his own medicine. 

“I knew you wanted me off your skin, but I didn’t realize you wanted me gone.” And he knew what you meant, immediately wincing at the thought.

“I’m sorry, __” The apology came out almost in a desperate manner. Ao’nung was aching to touch you– to hug you close. He was willing to apologize forever, if it meant that you’d finally turn around and look at him, but when you did, his body went rigid and he wanted to swallow his words. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

You were crying and you looked everywhere but him. He took a step forward and when you didn’t retreat, he took the chance to hold your cheek, caressing it with his thumb. You absolutely hated it– hated him. Even after everything, he was warm. “You don’t get to be sorry.”

“How could you be so,” You hit his chest harshly, the water splashing along your movements, “How could you be so mean?”

“I am young, __” Ao’nung softly said, his eyes on you unmoving. “Young and absolutely stupid.” 

“Damn right you are.”

He let out a breathy chuckle. “I never had anyone love me the way you do. Anyone who paid me any mind wanted me for my status– they only wanted the olo'eyktan’s son.” 

You turned your head with a click of a tongue, only for him to grab your chin to look at him again. Of course you never wanted him because of his or his parent’s title– you loved him genuinely and he was a coward to not see that. His expression was nothing but sincere and you hated it.

“I am young and stupid, __, so please.” He takes another step forward and you were sure the small gap between your bodies had cut your inability to breathe. The water had gone cold and you couldn’t move. You stayed there, looking up at him. “Let me grow old with you and I promise to be wiser.” 

“I see you, __.”

☆ mauve here! FINALLY DONE W THIS AO'NUNG PIECE, JESUS CHRIST. this was actually the first thing i've originally written prior to making this account because the lack of aonung content was >:(((( so here i am, giving him my long awaited attention. finding pictures of him were so hard as well! i enjoyed writing this though, i love aonung and his sibling dynamic w tsireya

i left this in a cliffhanger, i think, BECAUSE personally i wouldn't let that slide. i wouldve left aonung to beg FOR DAYS but eh

© avatarkv, do not repost.

I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS PAIN

💔

Android AU where you purchase a discounted and broken Bakugo model.

He’s got limited movement in his right arm, a faulty ocular system and a series of burns that cover one side of his face and have made the middle of his chest all melted and tacky - the synthetic skin warped like scarred flesh, but he works well enough.

It’s nice, having him around. You cook together. Watch movies. Go on picnics. Hike. Dine out. Visit aquariums and museums. It doesn’t take long for people to start assuming…

Husband. Boyfriend. Fiancé. It’s all thrown round. An endearing misunderstanding that never garners more than a blush, or at least it was, until the feelings started.

It’s a growing debate, if the androids can feel like humans can, but you find yourself at his mercy anyway. You fall for him slowly, but definitely, lost to him in all of the ways you’d never thought possible.

You bottle it, lock it in your chest even when it becomes too much taking you in a choke hold and then one day, you just… Burst.

Ducking under the rail of the park, you cross the wood-chips and toss yourself to the curved rubber seat of the swing. Beyond the small park is the ocean - a small slither of wide open blue that crashes against the walls of the sea barrier before you.

This was your place, just your place and now, now you’re sharing it with him.

He sits on your left, pushing himself with the balls of his feet. In the shadow of the street light with his synthetic blonde spikes spilling over his forehead, he almost feels like a lover - like something more than he can be. ‘I like it here.’

‘I know.’ Bakugo turns, smirks. The social module downloaded into his brain makes it look perfect, tells him the exact angle his lips should stretch to for the chosen effect.

‘There’s something about the sea being so close, it’s…’

‘Calming.’

‘Yeah.’ You sigh, glancing over to Bakugo careful not to look too long. ‘It’s calming.’

‘You wanna know why?’

‘Sure.’

‘My search says it’s due to the broad nature of the sound, as it hits your ear...' He taps your tragus. 'It creates a deep tonal noise, which due to its processing ease in the brain creates a soothing effect.'

'Huh.' It’s strange, hearing him talk like this. Usually, he’s so informal, so blunt and matter of fact it’s strange when all of that wiring in his head kicks back in and has him talking like… Well like a robot.

‘Did it again, didn’t I?’

You chuckle. ‘Sometimes you just talk like we’re worlds apart.’

‘Sorry. I -.’

‘No, no…’ You smile, softly, before reaching over and resting your palm on his thigh.

Bakugo blinks, looking down at the hand wrapping his leg. Gingerly, he accepts it. Entwining his fingers with yours, he squeezes. ‘I…’ His voice is a whisper. ‘I don’t want to hurt you.’

‘Katsuki.’

Squeezing softly, Bakugo doesn’t lift his gaze when he talks. 'I don't love you.'

You laugh, the cold air stinging your teeth. ‘I don’t love you.’ It’s a half-truth, the emotion caught in your chest might not yet be love, but it’s too close to it for comfort. ‘You don’t have to love me.’

Bakugo breathes deep despite not needing to. ‘I - I don’t feel -.’

You cut him off, eyes wide, a softeness already burrowing into your expression. You can’t imagine what’s it’s like, to be filled with a thing you were born never to have - to be coming alive for the first time. ‘Katsuki… You do. I know that you’re more than just a robot… More than -‘

‘No.’ Bakugo tightens his grip on your hand, flicking his eyes up to meet yours. ‘I can - I do feel…’ He corrects. ‘I just don’t feel for you what you feel for me.’

Nooo my heart 😭 in my dreams we wait for him, he's helped us, now we help him by waiting for him 💔❤️❤️

ice hockey player bakugo x figure skater reader who try to teach eachother their different ice skating related crafts.

showing up to each other's events. bonding over similar past injuries made when falling on the ice. reader wearing bakugo's old / past hockey jerseys as a pajama shirt / dress.

bakugo having reader sign his hockey stick as a form of good luck. or they sign each other's skates !!

i am melting.

You made this super soft and cute but imagine Bakugou’s in a low level hockey league and he’s trying to make it into the big leagues. He spends all his free time practising and your town only has one local ice rink that you’re able to use to practise.

It’s open to the public most days but you have it hired out in the evenings to practise your dancing, and he has it for his team to practise hockey. You’re both constantly fighting over the ice— the hockey team often overrunning their allocated time and it eats into yours, so whenever it’s your turn before theirs you deliberately overrun your slotted time just to be petty.

So it has the team watching you on the ice while they wait for their turn to come out. Bakugou will never admit how beautiful you look dancing on the ice, how he could sit and watch you for hours because you look so ethereal. How worried he gets whenever you take a tumble, as he watches to make sure you get back up. Knowing firsthand how much those falls onto the ice hurt— but he doesn’t care about you. You’re just the reason why he can’t book the rink out full time, you’re constantly annoying him and acting like your stupid little hobby is better than his sport.

But there’s one evening where the team leave the ice after practise and he lingers, slowly packing his gear away as he’s left alone in the changing rooms as he stops near the top of the bleachers, dumping his bag on the floor as he sits and watches you— really watches you. The look of determination on your face as you swirl around the ice, the cries of pain when you fall which even make him flinch, but the way you’re so quick to get back up.

He doesn’t realise you can see him as you call out to him from the ice, asking if he’s enjoying the show— clearly embarrassed that you’ve fallen down so many times during this session. You’re not normally this bad… but you’ve just been having a bad day.

He picks up his bag and walks down the steps towards you, leaning over the wall as you skate towards him. This is probably the first time you’ve actually spoken to him like normal— without all the shouting and sarcastic remarks. When he’s this close he can see the tear streaks that stain your cheeks— the fresh ones clinging to your lashes as they threaten to fall. He wants to know what’s wrong, he wants to know everything but he doesn’t think it’s his place.

So you both stand there talking to each other, the rest of the evening. Bakugou even puts his skates back on so you can glide around the ice together just talking— and you find out more about each other. He finds out your goal is to hit the big leagues, just like him.

You tell him about a qualifying event you have coming up and to your surprise he’s there, sitting at the top in the corner as you perform. A small smile on his face as he nods his head in greeting to you from where you are on the edge of the ice. Smiling back as you prepare to start your set.

The last thing you’d expected was for the rough, brash hockey player you’d been fighting with for weeks to show up at your qualifier and yet here he was.

He wonders why you’re dancing alone when everyone else has a partner, wonders why you look far more determined to succeed than all the other couples waiting to perform (because clearly you have to work twice as hard when you’re performing alone), and he wonders whether there’s anyone else here supporting you— because he’s never seen you with anyone else.

Awe my heart feels all mushy 😭❤❤

i. KIRISHIMA EIJIRO RECC LIST

credit to the owner ( lmk if you know who made it )

kiri’s list is growing so much ( and will continue too ) as he is indeed best boi — if you did not know, u know now — and i thought it was time he got his own list!

— the fics are separated by one-shot’s, multi-chaptered ( ones that have short and/ of a few chapters or one-shot’s in the same universe ), and series.

— most of these are fluff, but please read the warnings that are added by the author. i don’t want anyone to feel uncomfy or triggered

— if you have any kirishima ( or other mha/ bnha, hq, jjk, blue exorsist ) reccs let me know, we can share fics together!

ONE-SHOT

▸ the manliest man | @burnedbyshoto

▸ i do adore | @oikawasass

▸ more than friends | @katsushimaa

▸ crazy | katsushimaa

▸ summer love | @cafedanslanuit

▸ never a bad time | @kageyeaman

▸ in the kitchen | @moxie-elle

▸ soft mornings | @ultimate-astridwriting

▸ promise | @hazel1618

▸ ring pop | @kirishimaswife2819

▸ jealous | @kittykei

▸ are you jealous? | @bakublossom

▸ crush culture | bakublossom

▸ write me a cliche | @kaistarus

▸ disconnected | burnedbyshoto

▸ the pizza delivery guy | @myherowritings

▸ never a bad time | kageyeaman

▸ just a moment | @bnhaworld

▸ workout whispers | @technicallyflamey

▸ ten times happier | @justanotherperson

▸ heartless | @bnhaficswriter

▸ an unexpected matchmaker | @arigatouiris

▸ i’m not like her | @aphroditeparadisesstuff

▸ all the time you need | @akaa-keijis

▸ asexual | @expresstheobsession

▸ happy little accidents | @honniebears

▸ mornings | @dabiwrites

▸ unpredictable chemistry | @lovinkiri

▸ confession | @bakubabes-hatake

▸ better late than never | @bnhascribbles

▸ mosh pit | @kingkatsuki

▸ sparks | @croomdoom

▸ my hero | @once-upon-a-scenario

▸ a worthy life purpose | @whitplague

▸ love festival | @ohdeersthings

▸ endgame | @insomniacbitxxh

MULTI-PARTER

▸ to love and to love again | @mulier-indomita

SERIE

▸ kiripima | @dolliedarlin

▸ please, let me take you | @nyxdelanuit

OTHER RECOMMENDATIONS

i. MHA/ BNHA | STUDENT RECC LIST

ii. MHA/ BNHA | PRO’S & VILLAINS RECC LIST

iii. RECC LIST NAVIGATION

iv. HAIKYUU RECC LIST

v. JUJUTSU KAISEN RECC LIST

vi. ATTACK ON TITAN RECC LIST

vii. MATURE RECC LIST

I DONT NEED THESE TEARS

Twin Flames

pairing: adult!Ao’nung x fem!metkayina na’vi reader

contains: angst with underlying bittersweet fluff, slight infidelity, no smut but a very brief, vague rehashing of events wc: 3,124

“Honestly I’m better as your boy, I’d be kinda shitty as ya man, let’s go back to only being friends. I’m sorry girl I hope you understand it’s just, I don’t wanna fall in love.” - KYLE

You and Ao’nung were written in the stars. Twin flames. A love so fierce among two souls that it’d be impractical to think you could come out unscathed. Like night and day, never one without the other, but never meant to be together.

He never intended to hurt you, really, he didn’t. But somewhere in all the gold that glittered and the feeling of something fresh and exciting, he simply lost sight and forgot what he really wanted.

Love and Ao’nung were two words that never should have been in the same sentence. You wished you had listened to those around you, to those who noticed the two of you growing far too close for the relationship to remain platonic.

You wished you had listened to those who recognized the familiar gleam he’d get in his eyes when he wanted something he knew he wasn’t supposed to have; to those who warned that he would break you into a million pieces like he did with the others. But what you felt in your heart and saw with your own two eyes, you couldn’t deny. He was different with you, you swear he was.

A friend was what you called each other. Bestfriends. Growing up in Awa’atlu, you were stuck to his side like glue as a child, always begging to go hunting with him and his friends. You wanted to go everywhere he went, do everything he did. Disgruntled and annoyed at first, a little Ao’nung had eventually taken a liking to you, much to his own surprise. And from then on, your presence in each other’s lives was as normal as breathing.

And somewhere along the line, Ao’nung had become gentle with you, contrary to his usual irreverent personality. He stopped treating you like you were just another one of his knuckle-headed friends, but instead something more than that. He found himself staring at you longer than he used to; captivated by the details about your features or personality that he never cared to relish on in the past.

The way your face would light up every time you heard his voice call for you. How you’d beam when you sat with him on the beach and raved about your day. He’d simply watch you, humming in response every now and then to let you know he was listening, on his face a smile so love-sickeningly drenched in admiration while you gesticulated animatedly.

He would have puked had someone held a mirror up to him to see his own besotted expression, but he loved how excited you were to talk to him about the smallest of things. How even while he’s studied the distinct map your starred freckles project along your body over and over again, for some reason, he still finds himself getting lost in them.

He doesn’t want to fall in love.

It’s what he tells himself every time a mention of your name has his ears perking attentively, listening in on the conversation regarding his newfound fascination. Every time a waft of your scent in the salt-laced breeze sends his mind reeling with thoughts he can’t seem to mute. But it’s too late.

Hell, how couldn’t he have fallen for you? You’re always perched on the dock outside his mauri before eclipse, swinging your legs as you patiently await his return from training so the two of you can spend some time alone before dinner.

Genuinely happy to see him regardless of how grumpy he can be, because you like him for him. And you’re completely unaware of how his mind battles with his heart as he admires you from afar, wondering how he’d let himself tumble face first into an irreversible fondness for you.

He doesn’t want to fall in love, but one can’t stop the inevitable.

Snarky teasing turned into transient observations that scarily resembled compliments. Chummy roughhousing morphed to playful touches to the most ticklish parts of you, just so he could hear your pretty laugh cascade through his ears like his own songcord. He had half the mind to add a bead, just for you.

And for a while, he felt it too, honestly he did. But Ao’nung wasn’t familiar with love, had pushed the thought of it away for so long that now he had no idea how it was supposed to happen. The things you were and weren’t supposed to do. He never knew that the fluttering feeling of butterflies swarming in his stomach were good, that he shouldn’t run from them, but embrace them.

Sure he’d grown up watching his parents display their affection to one another; grown up hearing the stories of an adamant, smitten Tonowari pining after a hard-to-get Ronal, despite her apparent aloofness. How he fell first and she fell even harder. But he never actually thought he would end up head over heels for a girl. It was usually the other way around, girls pining over him while he let the attention boost his ego.

He was a no strings kind of guy— utterly terrified by the thought of being responsible for breaking a girl’s heart. Breaking your heart, like he knew he would because he fucks everything up and he wanted no parts of it.

But he’s conflicted. Deep down he does want what his parents have. Someone to call his own, someone to come home to. Someone who means more than a stupid hookup that would leave him regretting his decision afterwards and wondering why the hell he went through with it. But like always with the metkayina boy, pride trumps what his heart already knows.

He’s well aware that it’s too good to be true. The thought that he could ever experience what it truly means to be happy, by letting himself be loved by you, is all that it will ever be. A thought. An unattainable aspiration. He knows you’re too good for him. Compassionate, thoughtful, kind. Everything he’ll never be, coupled with a heart much too pure to be polluted by his indecision.

But maybe, just maybe he could enjoy the reverie while it lingered, and pretend like he could really have you all to himself. Just for one night. Selfishly disregarding his issues with commitment, all he could think about while he laid in bed was how badly he wanted to see you, how badly he wanted to be with you.

Leading you on was the last thing on his mind that late night he’d snuck out from his Mauri and to yours, determinedly pitching small shells he’d collected on the way there between the flowing tulle curtains of your open window to get your attention.

And for some reason you couldn’t sleep, as if that was fate’s way of setting the two of you up for failure from the beginning. You’d already spent an hour staring up at the intricate weaving of your Mauri’s roof, wishing your eyelids would hurry up and become weighted, when the small disruption of something clattering against the floorboards had you sitting up almost instantly.

You smiled keenly, already having an idea of who it was. He told you he’d come for you later, sometime after eclipse, and he always kept his promises. At least, you thought he did.

The both of you waded by the shore beneath the light of the moon, legs brushing against the other from the effort of treading once you swam further out. Childishly splashing the other with small waves of cool, salty water and trying your best to keep your laughter quiet; the village long asleep but your hearts awake.

It was when he bundled you closer, when strong arms lagged through the calm waters to wind around your waist and pull you into him. That, was when you knew nothing would be the same.

You should have pulled away, should have called it a night before things could progress, like the voice in the back of your head was telling you to do. But just like always, those ocean eyes held you in a trance, a smug grin on his face in response to how deeply you blushed and it only made matters worse.

You wonder now if he knew what he was doing when he brought a hand up to caress your dampened cheek, his gaze undeniably tender when he told you he’d always thought you were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen.

You see now that you were stupid to fall for it. But in that fleeting moment, with your arms around his neck and your hearts beating as one, his lips moving against yours felt so right. It felt like that was where you were always meant to be, in his arms, pressed against the warmth of his skin as he set your soul ablaze.

You’d spent the rest of the night on the sand, the comfort of your bed long forgotten. He was all you needed. Entangled underneath the moonlight as you let him see so much farther into you than you had with anyone. He kissed broken promises upon your skin, lust-drunken words slurred from his mouth swaddled in the crook of your neck and you can’t believe you trusted him.

Your ability to see the good in everyone ultimately played the role in your downfall. You took pride in being someone who went off actions, and not words. Because it had never failed you before, but since then you’ve learned to never say never.

Curse your aching heart. You really should have listened when everyone told you to run, that behind all the kind gestures and longing glances and saccharine kisses to the forehead— it was all a game to him.

Things weren’t official with the two of you but you had planned to change that. Flung so deep into the intensity of your own feelings, everything about the way he treated you let you know that he must have felt the same.

Surely it’d be impossible to do all that the two of you had done with someone and not catch feelings. It’d be unimaginable to let someone peer so extensively into what makes you you, and somehow not fall in love with them.

“Meet me by the mangroves at noon, our spot.” You’d murmured between a parting kiss, just the day before, and he can’t believe he forgot.

He was enjoying his time with you too much to notice that he let things go on for too long, too busy reveling in the feeling of what it felt like to truly be loved. To be cared for.

He never intended for it to go this far, constantly having to remind himself to break the news to you that he wanted to remain friends, so he wouldn’t lose you all together. To let you go before he could do something to hurt you.

Ao’nung knew he was in too deep the moment he realized you were the last image playing behind his eyelids when he fell asleep, and the first thing he thought about when he woke up.

The idea of him loving someone so profoundly shocked him to his core, scared him into submitting back into his old habits. He needed to be with someone who couldn’t see him, someone who if he were to mess things up, the sight of them in fragments due to his actions wouldn’t cause him to endure that same agony. So subconsciously, he did what he always does when he has a good thing going for him. Fuck it up.

The sound of his laughter in the distance carried your feet along the buoyant netting that served as walkway between the homes of your village. A hopeful grin plastered on your face and a freshly woven armband clutched between your hands. A gift from him to you, and though not very traditional for you to give the first courting gift, nothing about your situation was, so you found it more than fitting.

The sight in front of you halted your movements, leaving your mind to try and make sense of the scene before your eyes could confirm what you feared to be true. What everyone had tried to warn you of.

The man who succeeded in making you feel a way no other had, stood a little ways in front of you, with a girl. Her back leaned against the rocks while she batted her lashes and gazed at him as if he’d hung the stars in the sky himself. The same way you’d found yourself doing every time he so much as looked in your direction.

A mere conversation between the two of them would never have been enough to upset you, you liked to think you were more secure than that. But you’d be lying to yourself if you claimed you didn’t see the way his hand cradled her cheek, and how his eyes flitted over her features, as if she were the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen.

Your insecurities didn’t have much work to do, as it was the words that left his own mouth that confirmed your fears. The same thing he had confessed to you— all those nights ago when you laid intwined under the stars— he swore to her. With that same glint in his eye, that same longing look that you were foolish to ever believe would be reserved for you.

A fire surged up the column of your throat and a dreadful weight settled in the pit of your stomach that almost had your knees buckling. Your lips parted to speak, to ask him what the hell he was doing with her when he was supposed to have met you here.

But the words never came, they remained lodged between the confines of your heart-wrenched vocal cords. Your fist tightened around what would’ve been a lovely moment between the two of you, and the sound of it thumping against the ground, paired with the cloud of sand it brought up in its wake was enough to peel his attention from your giggling contender.

His startled, turned guilt-ridden expression would’ve rendered comical to you, but the rush of hot tears that bubbled over your waterline and stained your seafoam cheeks were far too impatient to wait for you to get a laugh in.

You staggered back with a denying shake of your head, a string of curses inaudible as you threw your hands up once he made a move to get to you. The girl he had been so enamored with just moments ago conveniently forgotten the second he witnessed your heart fall through your chest.

He called out for you in a panic, hurriedly sifted his hands through pale golden and swiftly scooped the disheveled accessory from the sand before his feet took off.

Ao’nung chased you through the village until he was nearly winded. Ignoring your hisses for him to leave you alone and brushing off the harsh shoves you sent to his chest as if they weren’t actually starting to hurt.

“Please, wait!” Another plea for you that went ignored, your ears only filled with the painful ringing of betrayal.

Blinded by the moisture in your eyes, you realized he’d cornered you. Chased you all the way to a secluded clearing behind the palm trees so you would stop running and just talk to him.

A strong hand gripped your forearm, turning you around rougher than intended to meet the frantic look in his eyes. “Please,” He implored breathlessly and his chest heaved from his efforts just moments earlier. “I never meant for it to go like this.”

You twirled from his grasp and swatted his hand away in the process, your face screwed up with hurt and he watched every conflicted emotion pass through your eyes at once. You didn’t even know how you were still standing.

“I gave myself to you!” Your voice wavered as you thrusted an accusatory finger to his chest. His lips moved, but no words left them as he clutched the forgotten gift in his hands. “I can’t believe I was so stupid.” You whisked your head away, shielding your face as another round of tears threatened to make themselves known, as if you weren’t embarrassed enough.

“I’m- I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking. I-“ His head dipped to the side to match his drooping shoulders, and you felt the rough pad of his thumb graze your cheekbone in an attempt to fix what was already broken. “Tahni, please, I was going to tell you. I swear-“

“You did this on purpose, didn’t you? Was this all some kind of sick game to you?” You choked out and backed away from his touch with your arms crossed over your chest, suddenly feeling exposed in front of the man who had already seen you so much barer than you stood now.

But with your feelings worn on your sleeves and so obviously unreciprocated, you felt more naked than you’d ever been regardless of the coverings you were wearing. Completely vulnerable in front of him, so naively gullible to think he’d ever put aside his immature desires and feel the same way you did.

“What- No! I’d- I’d never-“ He sputtered an answer vehemently, his expression almost wounded as he immediately denied your claim. “I just, I can’t give you what you need. You deserve better than me.” His hands found yours despite your efforts to avoid them, and he quickly realized why you didn’t want to be touched.

A stark contrast from your pained stature, the affliction he had caused, your body relaxed the second he touched you and your composure crumbled before him.

Sobs racked through your body and you weakly tugged your hands from his grasp to no avail, your words shaky as you begged for him to let you go. And without another thought he pulled you into his embrace, firmly caging you between the arms that once comforted you.

But they failed to replicate that same feeling, the image of what once was completely tarnished by his own actions. The words that left your lips were enough to make his eyes well with a wetness foreign to him. A deep-seated feeling he’d never forget. Remorse.

“You’re cruel, Ao’nung.”

The sound of your heart shattering drowned out his incessant, anguished apologies and your body slumped in his arms. You let him hold you, allowed your forehead to fall into the dip of his chest as large hands caressed into the curve between your trembly shoulders.

You mindlessly permitted his attempts to console you as you knew you would never let him close to you again. The two of you stood like that for a few minutes, until your weeping reduced to jagged inhales while you struggled to catch your breath.

“Did it mean anything to you at all? Any of it?” You squeaked hopelessly, and the sound of your broken voice sent daggers to the heart you were almost certain he didn’t have.

With his chin rested atop your head, his eyes squeezed shut and he exhaled unsteadily before he spoke.

“More than you know.”

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I am on my knees

High Infidelity II

Adult!Neteyam x (f)Metkayina!Reader x Aonung

Warnings: cheating, aonung being an absolute dick, cursing, 18+ minors dni

Word count: 5.6k words

Notes: besties, you ate this up and i love you for it. seems we all love neteyam mr steal-yo-girl, and i get it, i get it so much. enjoy x

previous part (x)

Lock broken, slur spoken, wound open, game token I didn't know you were keeping count

Your picket fence is sharp as knives I was dancing around, dancing around it

“One day, you’re going to beg me to fuck you. And I’ll do it so well, you will never be able to get me out of your mind, never be able to touch yourself again without an image of my cock slipping in and out of you ingrained in your brain.” 

His words lingered in your mind as much as the aftershocks of the pleasure he took out of you lingered in and on your body. You were shaking, shaking with guilt and fear, at what you did, at what just happened, at thoughts of how you could possibly fix this, or hide this, but worst of all, at how much you wanted more. You needed more. You were shaking because it wasn’t enough. Reeling because, right now, even as fear and guilt pooled in you, they held no candle to the desire that settled deep within your soul, that seeped into every facet of your being, into every cell of your body. 

You wanted him. You needed him. You wondered briefly if there were any lengths you wouldn’t go to in order to feel this feeling again, to get him to do to you everything you knew he was capable of, everything you couldn’t even imagine, but wanted to find out. As you made your way back to your tent slowly, face flushed and weak knees, trying to adjust your disheveled figure and your wrinkled loincloth, you knew the answer was no. There were no lengths.

You were excited to be able to go to sleep tonight, excited to be able to leave your mind and soul to rest and weigh in the calamitous actions that have transpired in this fateful day, and felt anxiety fill you up as thoughts of the consequences of your actions started bearing down on you. What were you going to do? How would you ever be able to look Aonung or his family in the eye ever again? You were angry at him, so angry, so bitter and hurt at the way he has treated you for so long, at the way it felt like he almost pushed you into this scenario, pushed you to a point of breaking, a point you never thought you’d reach. You were a good girl. Kind, and happy and empathetic and understanding. That’s why you and Tsireya have always had such a strong bond - two girls with no ulterior motives, no underlying agenda, no mean spirit or facetious intentions. Just pure light, emanating and spreading around you to everyone you touched. You stood by Aonung his whole life, you allowed him to change and grow while he shrunk you into a shell of yourself, of who you were, who you could have been if he actually loved you enough, actually cared enough. 

Your tent was cold and desolate as you entered it, just like you felt. All alone. The longer Neteyam’s presence and his warmth and his words were removed from your own, the worse you felt, the worse the feelings pooling in the pit of your stomach, nagging at your mind and cursing you, admonishing you for your thoughtless actions and irredeemable mistakes.

“I fucked up again, didn’t I?”  

You jolted violently at the voice coming from deep within your tent, enveloped in a blanket of deep, unflinching darkness. You turned towards it, and as your eyes adapted slowly, you could make out Aonung’s body, and the tiny bioluminescent freckles glistening dimly and increasing in size as he moved closer to you.

Your heart thumped in your chest as the one person you didn’t want to see, the one person you couldn’t see without fumbling into a mess of broken heartedness and misery, stood in front of you, shoulders hunched and a forlorn look on his usually peppy and unencumbered face. 

“I can’t seem to be able to stop myself from hurting you, from making a mess of a good situation, a good person.”

You gulped silently at his words, trying to push the lump that formed in your throat, that didn’t allow you to speak or to acknowledge his presence, so you just watched him and waited. Waited, as he reached over and took your hand in his, his soft hands a striking difference to Neteyam’s calloused ones, and you cursed yourself for thinking of the Omatikaya boy even in this moment, when he should be pushed away from your thoughts, so far away he should be a dot on the horizon of your mind. His other hand found your cheek, that he was caressing carefully, softly, like you were a doll or a feather that would be blown away at the slightest push or breeze of the wind, which, in this moment, it felt like you were. 

“Please look at me. Please.” 

He willed your face upwards, putting pressure on your jaw as you refused to meet his gaze, and eventually you had no choice but to see his eyes, those beautiful sky blue eyes that you used to get lost in as a child, that used to shimmer and glow with childlike wonder when they looked at you, eyes that were now red and sad. You winced as you took them in, took him in, as the regret and sorrow almost rolled off of him and into you, amplifying your own pitiful emotions and your ever-growing self-loathing. 

“I’m so sorry. I know the words mean nothing coming from my mouth, I know that. I know that no words could ever make it up for the way I’ve been treating you all this time, and how much I have taken your love, your kindness, for granted. You know, you are the only one, the only person in my life that has always stood by me, that has seen me for more than I was, but who I could one day be. I’ve always felt like a failure. My whole life, I have lived in the shadow of my parents, who I have continuously let down by not being who they wanted me to be, who they thought I could be. I have lived my whole life knowing I was a disappointment to them, a stain on their immaculate track record, that was partially erased only by Tsireya’s presence, but was still there, no matter how hard they tried to hide it. But you, you’ve always seen me, you’ve always believed in me. I have loved you my whole life, but when they both ordered me, told me I had no other choice but to be your mate, that you were the only way I could redeem myself in their eyes, you became something else. A burden, another reminder of all the things I’ll never be, all the ways I’ll never be enough for my family. I blamed you for their shortcomings, and my own, and I am sorry.”

The tears were falling flawlessly down your face, like there was no other place for them to be than on your cheeks and on your chest, on his thumbs as he was brushing them away gently. 

“I’ll be better, I promise. You deserve better.” 

I don’t, you thought miserably. Not anymore. 

You barely got out of your tent in the next few days, dread filling you as the marui shook with every person who walked the common pathways that connected all the homes together, as you imagined it was Aonung or Neteyam, or Tsireya, or anyone else who you would have to look at and talk to and lie to. Your mate-to-be was busy, busier than usual with the Omatikaya, who were all getting better in time and as a result, needed more attention with more complicated matters, matters which took effort and patience, and you were glad. In a sick part of your soul, you hoped Aonung would have continued treating you like dirt, like he had for so long, as that would have diminished the guilt eating at you, guilt that now engulfed your every happy thought, every ray of light in you and replaced it with dark thoughts and heavy resentment for everyone involved. You tried so hard to stop thinking of Neteyam, of his hands and his lips and his words, and hated him for doing this, hated him for the effect he had on you, for turning you from an innocent soul into this, an adulterer, a liar, a mess of depraved thoughts and desires, pulsating through your body and settling in your core, that ached to be filled, that was dying to feel him, to be ruined by his touch, that was so powerful that it took everything in you, every ounce of focus and self-restraint to drown it, instead of letting it drown you. 

A few more days passed and you knew it was time to face the world, and face your fears. Your eyes settled on the new bracelet now adorning your arm, crafted by him with some of the most beautiful beads, pebbles and shells you have ever seen. An apology gift, he called it. As you thought about it, and about him, a revelation hit you, spreading its gleam all around you and bringing new breath in your lungs.

A new beginning. You both deserved a new beginning. You both deserved the chance to start over. You made mistakes. A big one in particular. But so did he. So many of them. You both screwed up, but you could move past. He wanted to, why shouldn’t you want to? He was your mate-to-be, he was your chosen one, your betrothed, your friend since childhood. You both deserved a second chance. You wanted to try. You had to try, you owed it to yourself and to him to try to give this a chance. 

And now was the best time to do it, as you knew from Tsireya that she was taking the Sullys to the Cove of the Ancestors today, which meant Aonung was most likely training with his father. 

“One day, you’re going to beg me to fuck you. And I’ll do it so well, you will never be able to get me out of your mind, never be able to touch yourself again without an image of my cock slipping in and out of you ingrained in your brain.” 

Neteyam was a mistake. A mistake you wouldn’t make again. You had to try. 

You had to try. 

As you suspected, Aonung was deep in training with his father, who looked up and smiled widely as his eyes fixated on your approaching form. You liked Chief Tonowari. He was kind and gentle, and he was excited about the prospect of you joining their family. You wondered briefly if he could ever understand, if he knew how much his excitement on the matter inadvertently caused you grief, and put strain in between you and his son and made the bond that much more difficult to deal with, the idea that much harder to swallow.

You greeted him, smiling in his direction and the smile faltered slightly as you and Aonung made eye-contact. He was still embarrassed about his actions, and still thought you were distant because you hadn’t forgiven him yet. You hadn’t, but your need for distance had dark undertones he could never even imagine, and you didn’t want him to. 

“Are you here to train with us?” The Olo’eyktan chuckled a little at his joke. You were no warrior and he knew that. You didn’t have the stomach for such things, preferring to keep to yourself and to help from the sidelines, the gift of the Tsahik running through your veins from a young age.

“Not quite, just here to see your son.” 

“If your parents don’t come back in time, you should join us for the celebration of the tulkun returning. We’d love to have you, and I’m sure my children would, too.”

“I’d love to. Thank you for the invitation.” 

Elation enveloped you as the horn that announced the return of the tulkun was blown, and you immediately left your tent and dove straight into the warm, clear-blue water and called for your trusty ilu, your good friend, hurrying towards your spirit sister, that you knew was waiting for you. It was a day of bliss, of celebration, of happiness in the clan, the most important day of the year, that marked the beginning of days of festivities and rituals, and you couldn’t wait. It was like the universe, like Eywa was giving you a chance, a clear sign that the tides were changing, and you could be changing with them, embracing the new and discarding the old. 

You heard her sooner than you saw her, her indistinguishable voice propelled through the water straight to your ears and through your body, filling you with relief and light. Her trills and stories allowed you to relax for the first time in so long, and you listened as she told you tales of her travels, of all the memories she’s made in the year you’ve been apart. When it was your turn, you did the same, stopping at the story you wanted most to tell, but knew you couldn’t, even to her. 

“There’s more that you want to say, isn’t there? I know you’re keeping something from me, something important, something life-altering.”

You winced and scowled in her direction, upset at how well she knew you, at how connected you were. You looked around you, trying to see if anyone would be paying attention to you, and noted all Metkayina were too busy with their own stories, their own reunions, for you to matter in the slightest. 

“I met someone. He makes me feel things I have never felt before. He makes me question my life, and everything in it. He treats me well, and says all the right things, but it’s wrong, it’s a mistake. He’s a mistake. I’m trying to fix it, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to.” 

“Sometimes, people come in our lives as mirrors to ourselves. Mirrors to our soul, allowing us to see the truth in who we are, the truth of what we want. To shine a light on the darkness within, on the deepest parts of us we would have never seen without them. Sometimes, that’s the only way for light to enter in places it would have never reached otherwise.”

You had no answer to that, and you hoped whichever mirror Neteyam held to your soul didn’t lead to so much darkness it would overtake you and the people you loved, the people you never wanted to hurt. 

The celebrations were as beautiful as they always were, surrounded by music and cheering, dancing and good food, love and friendship. You were happy if not a little nervous to spend this time with your soon-to-be in-laws, and that happiness quickly vanished as you realised you were to be joined by the Sullys. 

Aonung had a small smile on his face as he spotted you, and you tried your best to focus on him and not behind him, at the man staring at you with such intensity it was making you acutely aware of your own heartbeat, that now sounded painfully in your ears and against your eardrums. The whole world drowned around you, as it always seemed to when his presence was near yours, and Tsireya had to shake you, in order to bring attention to herself and back to the present, back to them. 

“Sister, are you alright?

“Yes, Tsireya. I am fine, sorry. I got lost in my thoughts.” 

She laughed a little at you, but then took your hand and guided you to the strangers who were eyeing curiously. 

“Sister, these are the Sullys. My dad invited them for the celebrations, as it is their first return of the tulkun. This is Jakesulli, the former Olo’eyktan of the Omatikaya and Toruk Makto, Neytiri, the former Tsakarem of the Omatikaya, and their children, Neteyam, Kiri, Lo’ak and Tuk.” 

You tried your best to force a natural smile out. 

“It’s nice to meet you. I have heard a lot about you all, about some of you more than the others.” You eyed Tsireya playfully and your eyes briefly moved towards Lo’ak, who you knew Tsireya took a liking to. The entire family laughed at your joke, and at Tsireya and Lo’ak’s bashful and embarrassed looks. You felt a small twinge of jealousy for Tsireya, who was able to freely choose her mate, to freely love a Sully without contention or judgement, or pressure, and was obviously loved the same in return, as the Sully looked at her like the sun rose in her eyes. You didn’t know what that felt like, at least not until you met Neteyam, a man who you couldn’t have, a man who you couldn’t keep your thoughts from gravitating towards, a man who was eyeing you like he was undressing you with his gaze alone. You swallowed harshly, trying to contend with his presence and the wetness gathering in your beaded loincloth.

After dinner, the adults dismissed you, knowing deep down you all would much rather go and enjoy your time with the rest of the Metkayina youth, who knew how to celebrate, especially on nights like this. You were young adults now, and young adults got to go off on their own, and got to have their own kind of parties that the adults could no longer prohibit you from enjoying. That’s where you were headed. It was wild, and it was hot. It was everything you were afraid of growing up, and everything you craved now, more so by the day, it seemed. Mates and prospective mates were dancing sensually with each other, cups filled with alcohol made of the plants growing in the mangrove jungles deep within the island and spilling on and around them with each undulation of their bodies. You loved it, loved your traditions that were unique within the Na’vi people, that no other clan knew about or experienced quite the same way. You smiled as Tsireya handed you a cup and watched as Rot’xo poured some of the drink into everyone’s cup, and you all signalled an I See You to each other before taking a small sip, enjoying the way the warm liquid left burning traces as it made its way down your throat. 

You watched as the rest of the your companions did the same, and chuckled a little at the way Kiri and Lo’ak and Tsireya reacted to the drink, clearly their first time trying something like this. 

“That’s all you get, youngsters. I don’t want to have to drag any of you back home in a couple of hours and have to face the wrath of either Olo’eyktan.” You heard Aonung say, as he removed the jug from Rot’xo’s hands and kept it for himself. “Now go, enjoy yourselves. Show the forest people how we, Metkayina, do things.” 

There it was again, that mischievous glint in his eyes, and you pondered how will the alcohol affect your mate-to-be this time. It was always a surprise, ranging from kind and sweet and loving, to aloof and despondent, to angry and wanting to pick fights with whomever was unfortunate enough to be close by. He took your hand and pulled on it gently, willing you away, away from sight, away from the others. You followed him, unable to stop yourself form glancing behind you one last time, and wishing it was someone else doing it instead. When your eyes met Neteyam’s, you knew he felt the same, and you tried to remove the image of the hurt flashing across his face from your memory, knowing he wasn’t yours to care for, and you weren’t his to take away. 

You and Aonung sat down on the warm, golden sand that now glowed with bioluminescent plankton whenever the water hit it, and you felt your body relax at the calming, rhythmic sound of the waves that cleared your mind and soul of the anguish that seemed to constantly plague it recently. A constant tug of war lived within you, between what you wanted, what you needed, and what you felt was the right thing to do. You didn’t know which was going to win, but you knew it was a lose-lose situation regardless. You either lost your innocence, and the trust of the people you loved, or yourself. You didn’t know which was worse. 

The Metkayina young man poured more alcohol in your cup and you welcomed it, welcome the opportunity for your mind to quiet, no matter how that was accomplished. You felt the alcohol going to your head quickly, making a mess of your thoughts and lifting your spirits. You and Aonung stayed like this, talking comfortably, just like you used to do when you were younger, and you felt grateful for the memories, and grateful that the drunk Aonung you got was this, the nice and charming version of himself you have always loved, you have always hoped for. 

“Remember when we were fifteen and I convinced you to sneak out and go outside of the reef to Three Brothers Rocks? It took forever for me to talk you into it, but I think you were happy once we arrived and you found pebbles and shells you never could on the beach. I remember looking at you admiring them, telling me how beautiful they are, and all I could think of is how beautiful you were.” 

You smiled at his words, and how slurred they were the drunker he got, and giggled when he let out a small hiccup. 

“You’re just saying that because you’re drunk.”

“Maybe, but I don’t think so. You’re still so beautiful, even more beautiful. M-more beautiful… every day.” 

Your back was laying on his chest and a warm feeling cloaked you as you lowered your head on him and looked up at the stars. Maybe you could do this. Maybe you could forget about Neteyam and allow yourself to remember what it was like to love this man you’ve known all your life, the man you may not be in love with, but you could be one day, if he continued speaking to you the way he was, the way you’ve dreamt about all your life. 

He started peppering kisses down your throat, sucking on your soft skin and licking where you could feel he left marks. Heat pooled in between your legs as he did, and so did the hatred in your soul when the only face that came to mind was not the one currently on you, and you pulled yourself away from him, trying to put some distance in between your bodies and some thought back into your head. 

“Not now, Aonung. Please. We’re so close to the Iknimaya.”

“Exactly, we’re so close. Why wait anymore? I want you. I need you, I have for so long, I need to feel your body on me, around me. Nobody has to know.” 

“Except we will know. I will know. If I am to be part of your family, to be your mate, I want to do this right. You’re drunk, very drunk, and I’m getting there, and this isn’t the way to do it, not the way I want to remember this moment for the rest of my life.” 

He scoffed and pulled you by your queue back on his chest and you yelped as the action sent pain through your entire body. 

“Can you just lighten up for once in your life? You have always been such a fucking killjoy. Do you think your friends aren’t fucking their mates to be? Do you think they’re all prudes like you, waiting and waiting until you’re good enough to pass your Iknimaya?”

The pain of his actions and his words overtook your entire existence, warped itself around you until there was nothing left of you but its echoes ringing in you and out of you, in the form of sobs and cries you wish you could drown in. 

“Let me go.” 

You got up and forcefully removed your queue from his grasp, trying to ignore how badly the pain combined with the alcohol was making your head spin, and started walking away. You didn’t get very far, as he ran in front of you and put his body in between you and your path, and you hissed loudly at him, the sadness blossoming into anger so powerful, you have never felt it before in your life. 

“I’m sorry, alright? That came out wrong. Just… let’s not let this ruin this beautiful evening. I feel like I’m just getting you back, you can’t leave me.” 

“Get away from me, Aonung.” 

You watched in your hazed state as Aonung’s body twirled like an underwater current, and you struggled to understand what was happening, until a deep voice filled your ears and your senses, the way it always did, the way it always will. 

“You heard what she said. Leave her alone.” 

Neteyam’s navy blue body was barely visible in the dark of night, but his eyes gleamed with fury and intensity and so did his freckles, and it was enough to know that he was furious, and he was ready to fight. 

Aonung could barely stand up straight, but laughed mockingly in Neteyam’s direction. 

“Oh, the tree hugger is coming to the rescue. She’s my mate, she doesn’t need saving from you. Isn’t that right, yawne? Tell him you’re fine, we’re just playing around.” 

As he reached his hand over to grab you, you flinched and put even more distance in between you, getting so close to Neteyam that you felt the warmth of his body on yours, making you feel safe again. 

“Come back here, you -“ 

One finger is all it took, one finger against Aonung’s chest for him to be pushed back to his place, back away from you. 

“Back off. Now.” 

Neteyam’s voice was menacing, and you knew Aonung felt it too, as a quick look of fear flashed in his eyes and he stayed put, unable or unwilling to push the Omatikaya, who you both knew would win this fight by a landslide. 

“Smart choice.” 

His warm hand found your lower back and you shivered at the contact. “Let’s go, I’ll take you home.” 

There were no words as you walked on the beach that was still beaming with life and laughter, no words that could ever describe the feelings you felt inside, each of them stronger than the other, all of them threatening to overtake you. You saw the village come into view and knew you couldn’t bear it, couldn’t bear the thought of your tent where he could find you, where even if he didn’t, you would be all alone again. 

“I don’t want to go home. I want to go to the beach.” 

The tears were rolling down your cheeks mercilessly and Neteyam’s eyes softened as he nodded and motioned for you to lead the way. You were grateful for his presence and his silence, grateful for how he was barely touching you so as to not make you more uncomfortable or remind you of the man you left behind, grateful that he knew exactly what to do and what to say, grateful that he was everything Aonung wasn’t and nothing that he was. 

You were dizzy still as you arrived to your beach and dizzier still as you fell on your ass unceremoniously. The amber of Neteyam’s eyes reminded you of the liquid the brought you here, that made you this way, and you knew you couldn’t look into them for too long without feeling nauseated. 

He sat besides you, but left space in between you, which you appreciated. 

“I’m sorry this happened. Are you alright?” 

You laughed bitterly, unable to help yourself. 

“Am I alright? Well, let’s see. I have been treated like dirt for years by the guy I thought I loved and that I am meant to give myself to forever, then I met a guy that makes my entire body convulse the second he comes close to me, I allow him to do things to me only my mate should ever be able to do, and I love it, and I can only think about more, about his words and the way I only feel the way I feel when I’m with him…” you took a deep breath and sighed, allowing every dark thought and secret, everything you’ve kept shackled within you come to light. 

“Then the first guy comes and apologises, and says all the right words, which makes me feel even worse, makes me hate myself and hate everything around me, hate that I’ve allowed two men to drive me to this point, but still, I think that I should try. I should try to do this, be the good girl I’ve always been, keep my promise and my word to him and his family, to the clan. And then this happens.” 

“So no. I am not alright. I’m so far from alright, alright isn’t even on the same planet as me.” 

“I am sorry. I’m sorry I made your life harder than it needed to be. But I want you, I’ve wanted you since the moment I laid my eyes on you. I’ve watched you in the clan. You’re always kind, and helpful. You always have a smile on your face, a real, authentic smile. You’re a good person, and you deserve better. I did what I did because I want you to be mine. I thought you should know there are options out there. That you don’t need to confine yourself to someone just because you feel like you have to, that it’s expected of you. I know all about the pressures of expectations, and while I'm forced to shoulder them, I don’t want you to have to.” 

Your breath caught in your throat and there was nothing to say in regards to the power with which this man controlled every fibre of your being, the pull that his voice and his words had on you. He so quickly managed to become the sun your soul orbited around. You felt your body slowly inching closer to his, even as whatever little conscious mind you still had available was screaming for you to stop, that this was wrong and two wrongs don’t make a right. It took everything out of you, but you eventually listened. 

“I need to go. I wanted to come here, I wanted you to take me here, but I can’t be around you. Not anymore. Aonung is an asshole, and I will deal with him tomorrow, but what we did was wrong. What I did was wrong. I should have broken up with him, I should have told him that it’s over, that he’s treated me wrong one too many times. But I didn’t. And regardless what he’s done, I’m no better, not if I do this again. Once is a mistake, twice is a choice. I’m going home.” 

Neteyam sighed and you saw there was hurt in his eyes, on his face. He didn’t say anything to you as you left him and whatever it was you had behind. 

You needed to clear your head, clear the hurt and drunk thoughts swirling in your mind. You knew of a secluded spot to which Aonung used to take you when you were younger, that you thought would be perfect to wash this night away from your body and hopefully forget it ever happened. You pushed through the tall greenery surrounding you in order to reach it and stopped in your tracks when sounds of panted breaths and mixed moans filled your ears. 

“Aonung, fuck. Right there!” 

“You feel so good, baby. So good.” 

You ran as fast as your feet could carry you, praying and hoping they didn’t hear you, and when you knew you were far enough, you stopped and curled your body forwards as you threw up on the ground in front of you, groaning as the alcohol tasted much worse on your tongue coming out than it did going in. You were having trouble breathing as this night, that was horrible to begin with, was now bordering on unbearable, as the lewd sounds floated in every corner of your mind, powering the next round of sickness that felt like it was being expelled from deeper within you than just your stomach, from the unsightly parts of your soul. 

He was fucking another girl. You told him no, you told him you wanted to wait, and so he fucked another girl. Was this the first girl? The only girl? The first time? The only time? 

So many questions, so few answers, so little time to think, so much grief to swallow. So much anger, and vindication, so much thirst for revenge, a thirst that you’ve never felt before, that consumed you until there was nothing left but it. You spent so much time feeling horrible about yourself, about what you did. And you didn’t even do the thing you wanted to do, the thing you were desperate to do. But now, there was no hesitation in you anymore as you ran towards the beach that you hoped Neteyam was still on, relief so powerful a drug it cleared your senses and focused them on the man you wanted, that you had to turn away, that you now got to have, that you hoped would claim you, would show you everything Aonung never could. 

He was there. Of course he was. His back was to you, to the forest, and he was looking at the beach, looking at how the waves crashed into the sand, and you couldn’t help take a second to admire him, admire his beauty and poise, admire his strength and character, admire the way he was everything you weren’t, everything you wished you could be. You wanted him to show you, and to teach you, you wanted him to help you see there’s more to this world than what you’ve known, there’s more to this life than what you’ve been confined to feel. And you knew he could, you knew he would. All you had to do was ask. 

“Neteyam. I’m here to beg you to fuck me.” 

three parts it is, besties x

taglist (thank you ily xoxo) : @strawberryclouds22 @yeosxxx @bewbz2110 @loaksbaby @taleiak @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @littlexscarletxwitch

Spells Fired

"WHY CANT IT BE ME GOD DAMMIT" 😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

Pro hero Bakugou crashing into a building from a villain flinging him across the block. “Damn,” he grunts, sitting up from the rubble and smoke with his back aching from the impact.

And he looks around to gather his surroundings only to see you shivering in the corner of your apartment because your living room suddenly imploded while watching tv. You’re wide eyed and dumbfounded, covered in soot, in your homewear that’s just a tiny top and panties- and your confused call of Bakugou’s hero name bounces right off his head as he follows the little happy trail under your belly down into your panties’ hemline.

“Damn,” Bakugou says again, and sounds more breatheless than when he smashed through fucking concrete.