Noodle0180 - Noodle!

Hi

We lost a great man, a hero. We will never forget what you did for us Mandela RIP #RIP #mandela #Love #family #lost #country #Africa #hero #photos #memories ಥ_ಥ

Is it okay to want to die?

I’ve fucked up enough, it only seems fair

I don’t want to hurt anyone I love anymore

I thought I was doing okay

I thought things were okay

My mind makes it feel like everything is fine even when it’s obvious that things aren’t

I struggle so much with trying to survive

I focus too much on what makes me happy because keeping me happy keeps me here

But doing that hurts the ones I love

I neglect them

I hurt them

Over

And over again

I don’t want to do it anymore

I don’t want to hurt them

I don’t want to hurt me

If I die I won’t hurt them

I’ll only hurt them once more

One final time

And then it’ll be over and I’ll never hurt them again

It’s becoming a more welcoming thought

A thought I wish to indulge

Make it reality

But I’m afraid

I’m a fucking coward

Is it okay to want to die if it means I won’t hurt them anymore?

Why can’t my style be goth and cute girly girl next door and lazy🤦🏻‍♀️

#emo #dead #scary #gore #blood

I don’t really have anywhere else I can confess this and I feel bad because I’m going to therapy but I’m still so goddamn sad. But what I wanna say is that I fucking hate who I am, I feel like my friends could easily move on if I died. And it’s got a lot to do with the fact that they don’t ever message them first. SB is being so off with me and it’s fucking hurtful because we were like closer than family and I don’t know what I did wrong. If I didn’t message my friends first they likely wouldn’t message me of their own volition, the only one I think who really puts in the same effort as me is Hakuna, she’s literally the only one who puts in effort to message me first and care. I know that my friends are adults and that they do care for me and they’re busy with their lives, but I can’t remember the last time someone (one of my friends) messaged me first or asked if I was okay or told me they loved me or that things would be okay. I’m such a pathetic mess and I hate who I’ve become. I used to have such a spark in myself, I was happy and bubbly both inside and out. Now I’m just bubbly outside and a fucking broken, ugly, disgusting mess on the inside. I’m not posting this to gain sympathy or attention or whatever the fuck, I’m posting this so that if I’m alive in a year I can look back and laugh at how low my life was and be thankful that it got better. Please please get better I can’t live like this anymore I’m fucking tired.

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this is the offical ‘i care’ symbol this is how it works: basically you reblog this and your followers know that you care and that they can message you about anything anon or not and you will reply back or at least look at there message. if you care about your followers please reblog