Mivamoonlights - 🌹The Witch You Couldn't Burn🌹

Elastigirl: I’m sorry that she’s going to prison

Violet: I’m sorry that she’s rich and will probably get off with just a slap on the wrist

Peter: How do you ask a girl out? Tony: It’s simple. Bucky: Exactly. You just open the door and say, “Get out, you are bothering me.”

youngblood (deluxe) // firsts + lasts 

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Y/n: My boyfriend is too tall for me to kiss him on the lips. What should I do?

Daemon: Punch him in the stomach. Then, when he doubles over in pain, kiss him.

Rhaenyra: Tackle him.

Luke: Dump him.

Jace: NO TO ALL OF THOSE. JUST TELL ME TO LEAN DOWN.

#Him

#he really said we cope through humor

i love my sporty boys

and people say women don’t have hobbies 🙄

Okay but alienrry seems like softest person ever. He goes to the library to ensure his partner is fully satisfied during sexual activities, eats anything and everything apple and knits. I want to give him the biggest hug ever but I also want to choke on his dick. Pls

He’s top tier boyfriend 🥺🥺🥺 very soft, very pure, very golden retriever vibes 🥺🥺

He’s cute and cuddly and touchy because he never realized how satisfying and comforting touch could be and he stole Y/N’s Snuggie for himself because it’s soft and warm and she constantly has to parent him into wearing clothes beneath it because he wants to be naked all the time since, “Clothes are so restraining. What’s the point? Humans already know what each other’s anatomy looks like; why would you feel the need to hide something that’s public knowledge?”

“Because indecent exposure makes people uncomfortable.”

“Then why is there so much nudity on television?”

“Good question! Don’t know! Now please put on some boxers under my Snuggie so you’re not flashing the window when you manspread on my couch.”

“You like it when I manspread.”

“That’s not the point—”

“No underwear also means easy access. I figured you’d appreciate that.”

“Stop trying to seduce me into getting what you want.”

“Is it working?”

“No.”

“Then why are you clasping your legs together?”

Aemond and (Y/N) curled up together in their bed asleep:

Aegon: Guys… I had a nightmare…

(Y/N) patting the space beside them: Get in