Please, Let Him Be Soft.  I Know You Made Him       with Gunmetal Bones      and Wolf’s Teeth.

oh gods it was parents evening again tonight..

other parents: how did you do that?

Me:do what?

Other parents: your teenager is eating a salad..

Me:i never forced him eat, now he will pretty much eat anything…except chicken casserole which we both agree is gross

Other parents:we don’t get it.

Me: our only rules are bed at eleven on a school night and don’t hack any important government agencies.

Other parents: you don’t restrict screen time?

Me: you know 95% of kids will self regulate, given the chance?

Other parents: thats not true

Me: have you tried it?

other parents:…but, now he’s reading 1984

Me: he has had a university reading level since he was 12, what am i going to do censor his reading material?

other Parents: what if he reads something you don’t approve of..

Me: i fail to see your reasoning…

Me: you know he cooks too..it’s our mother/son time, we talk about his friends…

other Parents: he talks??

I think the best piece of character design advice I ever received was actually from a band leadership camp I attended in june of 2017. 

the speaker there gave lots of advice for leaders—obviously, it was a leadership camp—but his saying about personality flaws struck me as useful for writers too. 

he said to us all “your curses are your blessings and your blessings are your curses” and went on to explain how because he was such a great speaker, it made him a terrible listener. he could give speeches for hours on end and inspire thousands of people, but as soon as someone wanted to talk to him one on one or vent to him, he struggled with it. 

he had us write down our greatest weakness and relate it to our biggest strength (mine being that I am far too emotional, but I’m gentle with others because I can understand their emotions), and the whole time people are sharing theirs, my mind was running wild with all my characters and their flaws.

previously, I had added flaws as an after thought, as in “this character seems too perfect. how can I make them not-like-that?” but that’s not how people or personalities work. for every human alive, their flaws and their strengths are directly related to each other. you can’t have one without the other.

is your character strong-willed? that can easily turn into stubbornness. is your character compassionate? maybe they give too many chances. are they loyal? then they’ll destroy the world for the people they love.

it works the other way around too: maybe your villain only hates the protagonist’s people because they love their own and just have a twisted sense of how to protect them. maybe your antagonist is arrogant, but they’ll be confident in everything they do.

tl;dr “your curses are your blessings, and your blessings are your curses” there is no such thing as a character flaw, just a strength that has been stretched too far.

TRAYVON MARTIN (Walking home with iced tea and Skittles. Shot by George Zimmerman, who was found NOT GUILTY)

KEITH SCOTT (Sitting in car, reading. Shot by police officer, who was NOT CHARGED)

ATATIANA JEFFERSON (Looking out her window, shot by police officer, who is STILL UNDER INDICTMENT for murder)

JONATHAN FERRELL (Asking for help after auto accident. Shot twelve times by police, case ended in MISTRIAL)

JORDAN EDWARDS (Riding in a car. Shot in the back of the head by police officer, who was found GUILTY of murder ⭐)

STEPHON CLARK (Holdng a cel phone. Shot 8 times, 6 in the back. Officers NOT CHARGED)

AMADOU DIALLO (While taking out wallet, officers fired 41 shots by four officers, who were all ACQUITTED)

RENISHA MCBRIDE (Auto accident, knocked on door for help. Homeowner was found GUILTY of second-degree murder ⭐)

TAMIR RICE (Playing with toy gun, shot by police officer arriving on scene. Officer was NOT CHARGED)

SEAN BELL (Hosting a bachelor party, 50 rounds fired by police officers, who were found NOT GUILTY of charges)

WALTER SCOTT (Pulled over for brake light, shot in the back by police officer, who pleaded GUILTY to CIVIL RIGHTS VIOLATIONS *NOT* MURDER)

PHILANDO CASTILE (Pulled over in car, told officer he had a legally registered weapon in car. Officer ACQUITTED of all charges)

AIYANA JONES (Sleeping, accidentally shot by officer in a raid on wrong apartment. Officer CLEARED OF ALL CHARGES)

TERRENCE CRUTCHER (Disabled vehicle, shot by police officer, who was found NOT GUILTY of manslaughter.)

ALTON STERLING (Selling CDs, shot at close range while being arrested. NO CHARGES FILED)

FREDDIE GRAY (Beaten to death by officers while being transported in police van. All officers involved were ACQUITTED)

JOHN CRAWFORD (Shopping at WalMart, holding a BB gun on sale, police officer was NOT CHARGED)

MICHAEL BROWN (Shot by twelve times by officer, including in the back. NO CHARGES FILED)

JORDAN DAVIS (Killed because he was playing loud music. Shooter found GUILTY of first-degree murder ⭐)

SANDRA BLAND (Pulled over for traffic ticket, tasered and arrested. SUSPICIOUS SUICIDE while in jail. NO CHARGES)

AHMAUD AUBREY (Jogging, shot by two men who claimed they suspected him of burglaries. Both men charged with murder and aggravated assault ⭐)

BOTHAM JEAN (Shot at home, which police officer mistook for her own. Officer found GUILTY of murder ⭐)

OSCAR GRANT (Handcuffed and face-down, officer shot him in the back. Officer found GUILTY of involuntary manslaughter ⭐)

COREY JONES (Waiting by his disabled vehicle, was shot three times by police officer, who was found GUILTY of murder ⭐)

Remember them all. ✊🏻✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿

Also note, these are only the stories caught by the media and/or on video.

There is something to be said about how victims of abuse identify with Jason Todd.

Queer kids, most often specifically trans people, victims of violence and sexual abuse, domestic abuse and manipulation. Victims of sects and religious fanatisicm.

I think we find comfort in Jason because we find solidarity. We too know what it's like to suffer. And then have people turn around and tell your story like you didn't. Tell your story like it was your own making. Or inevitable.

To me, Jason will always be a patron saint of silenced victims. A voice that has been cut off by bloody murder and came back screaming. And then a righteous rage surpressed and distorted by the author.

How easy to see how that experience reflects our own pain.

wee snaw

como se dice….. oof

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

you think adam driver looks 38?

Adam Driver looks differant every damn time I look at him, I don’t know what I think

^ 17 and a half year old trying to look cool with his water in a wine glass with his older sister and her friends

^ A 38 year old lumberjack from Alaska who got on the news for winning the lottery

^ a 25 year old who regrets not finishing highschool as he resents his bus driver job

^ this middle aged man wrote a self help book about how to succeed in the corporate market