Also, A Friendly Reminder, The World We Live In Now Consists Of An Active Genocide.

anyone else want a queerplatonic relationship or is it just me

You can help an aroace this Valentine's day for the low low price of 1 billion dollars sent to me.

All 36 hospitals in Gaza have been destroyed by Israel. ALL 36. DESTROYED.

And Israel has the nerve to claim it doesn't bomb hospitals and is "careful not to target civilians".

Fuck you.

I will never forgive and I will never forget how the world allowed this to happen. If you are silent about this, you are complicit. Keep talking about Gaza!

This Christmas keep speaking up for Palestine, don’t stop educating and don’t stop advocating.

if I say I love him, you might think my words come cheap

let's just say, I'm glad he's mine

awake, asleep

Let's repeat this again

Asexual people can read smut

Asexual people can have sex.

Men can be asexual

Straight people are asexual.

Aroace people can be all of the above.

Not all Aromantic people are also ace.

You can be sex repulsed and still make sex jokes.

“ACES BELONG AT PRIDE”

a PSA for the naysayers and encouragement for those who need it. mostly the latter rather than the former, but for those who needed the PSA:

you’re welcome.

※ photos taken May 2018 at Tokyo Rainbow Pride. see more at queerascat.com.

queerness under apartheid

This pride month, let’s remember to never forget the life of Nex Benedict that we lost this year, in 2024. If you don’t know his story, I’ll tell it below. (CW for hate crimes, targeted attacks on LGBTQ+ individuals, suicide and self-harm, drug usage/overdoses. All sources used are linked.)

Nex was a 16-year-old trans nonbinary student who according to friends, used mainly he/him pronouns. He was also an indigenous person, which could potentially be another reason why he was targeted. He was in the girl's bathroom (i.e., the bathroom he was legally required to be in per the state of Oklahoma, where he lived) on February 7th, 2024 in Owasso High School. He was with friends, and after a brief altercation, was attacked by several girls whose identities have not been released, and beaten badly.

According to body cam footage of police’s discussions with Nex before he died, he was recorded of saying about before the attack: “I was talking with my friends, they were talking with their friends and we were laughing. And they had said something like, ‘Why do they laugh like that?’ And they were talking about us in front of us.” In response to this, Nex threw a water bottle at the girls, who proceeded to attack him and his friend. The altercation was broken up by faculty. It was recorded that ‘all students were able to walk to the nurse’ and that they didn’t have severe injuries. However, the next day, Nex passed out at home, and died at a pediatric hospital. While the initial cause of death was thought to be blunt force trauma from his injuries, with “numerous areas of physical trauma over Nex’s body that evidence the severity of the assault”, his death was later ruled as a suicide; a drug overdose. [Source.]

According to the full autopsy report: “The report listed a probable cause of death as “combined toxicity” from two drugs, one of which is available over the counter and the other by prescription. However, it didn’t provide any additional details regarding why the medical examiner believed the overdose was suicide. The full autopsy report notes that Benedict was involved in a physical altercation and had injuries to his head, neck, torso and limbs. These injuries, it found, were not lethal. The medical examiner also noted that Benedict’s medical history included bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety, self-harm, and chronic tobacco and marijuana abuse.” [Source.]

Whether Nex’s death was a suicide or a murder, his life was still lost. Whether he took it himself out of grief and trauma and pain, or whether those girls took it from him in an act of hatred and violence. His life IS LOST. We as a community seemed to move on from mourning him far too quickly. We should never forget the name of Nex Benedict, just as we should never forget the names of Brianna Ghey; Jean Butchart; Camdyn Rider; and far too many more.

I'd like to take a moment to honor Nex not from his death, but from his life. He was a beautiful soul, and that is what should be the focus. His death should not be the tagline of his life. After Nex's death, there were many rallies at the high school, with staff and students alike. Nex's best friend spoke there, and his words deserve to be highlighted here.

“Good evening. My name is Robin Ingersoll. I am a 16-year-old, also sophomore student. I want to start off by saying that Nex was transgender, and he used he/him pronouns. But he was so much more than his transness.  Tonight, I want to talk about who he was as a person and not just how he identified. I lived in Owasso my whole life, but I was homeschooled until eighth grade. When I first started school at the Eighth Grade Center. I didn’t know very many people and Nex was one of the first friends I’d ever made. Nex, and I dated kind of on and off over the span of the school year. As an individual, Nex was one of the strongest and toughest people I’ve ever met, but he often hid behind (that) to gain respect from people. And because of that, he built a lot of walls. And he didn’t let them down very often. But when he did, he can be one of the funniest and sweetest and most thoughtful people. And he would have done anything for someone that he cared about or loved." [Source; the article is continued here, I STRONGLY recommend that you read the rest, as there are many more testimonies.]

Another testimony was given by Eli, and her words highlight not just the death of Nex, but the death of another of her close friends due to their non-binary identity and indigenous roots.

“It feels like I’m just moving past the grief of Max Birdwell, which might be a new name to some of you guys. Max Birdwell is someone who passed by suicide due to bullying in 2022. And now, I have to go through this trauma all over again. [pause] Something I’ve said a lot in the past few days is that I feel like the state is failing us. Whether you feel like being part of the LGBTQ+ community is wrong, we still are people and they’re failing us. I feel like Oklahoma acts as if they are accepting of all. We have safe places, but [Oklahoma] is not a safe place. It’s crazy because both Max and Nex were Indigenous, nonbinary people. They were just kids. We are just kids. I just want people to speak out and make sure we feel safe to go to school. Some of us are homeschooled now because of the crazy amount of bullying that we are going through. Thank you so much for being here tonight. Seeing all of this and knowing who Nex was they never deserved this and thank you.” [Source; the article is continued here, I STRONGLY recommend that you read the rest, as there are many more testimonies.]

These are just kids. I myself am just a kid. So many trans kids feel unsafe to go to school, because they don't know if it will be their last time they do. Because we are not safe. We aren't safe from hate crimes, and we aren't safe from the debilitation of suicidal thoughts and thoughts of self-harm due to people's unrelenting hatred and cruelty just because we are who we are.

According to the HRC and FBI, “anti-LGBTQ+ hate crimes were up sharply from the prior year [2021 to 2022], with a 13.8% increase in reports based on sexual orientation and a shocking 32.9% jump in reported hate crimes based on gender identity.” [Source.] More than 1 in 5 hate crimes in the US are recorded to now be motivated by anti-LGBTQ bias, as well as especially anti-black bias. As said by HRC president Kelley Robinson: “The constant stream of hostile rhetoric from fringe anti-equality figures, alongside the relentless passage of discriminatory bills, particularly those targeting transgender individuals, in state legislatures, created an environment where it was sadly foreseeable that individuals with violent tendencies might respond to this rhetoric.”

As for suicide and self-harm amongst LGBTQ individuals, “The Trevor Project estimates that more than 1.8 million LGBTQ+ young people (ages 13-24) seriously consider suicide each year in the U.S. — and at least one attempts suicide every 45 seconds, and The Trevor Project’s 2023 U.S. National Survey on the Mental Health of LGBTQ Young People found that 41% of LGBTQ+ young people seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year, including roughly half of transgender and nonbinary youth.” [Source.] I myself have seen this first hand, both with myself (though to get a bit personal, I am nearing 100 days clean of self-harm), and with friends and family around me. And I believe that the biggest factor to that is lack of support AND increasing violence; therefore increasing HOPELESSNESS.

This rise in both statistics, for violence against us and violence against ourselves, is heartbreaking. Utterly heartbreaking. And with this year’s pride, it is very easy to feel disheartened. But we must remember that we are stronger than them. We have survived for hundreds and hundreds of years DESPITE THEM. Despite the hate, despite the violence. Because we remember the lives lost in the fight, and we honor their memory. From Stonewall to now; never forget that pride started as a RIOT.

It is easy to feel hopeless. To feel like you’re stuck the way you are and nothing will ever change. To feel like we are not advocated for, or not enough, and never will be. But when you find yourself sucked into that hole: remember the people who showed up for Nex. Remember the 174,000 dollars raised for his family's GoFundMe (warning: it does contain his deadname, though from testimonies given by family members, it seems that for the most part, he was accepted at home, or they were getting there). Remember that there is hope. There always is. And there will always be someone there who accepts and loves you for WHO YOU ARE.

As said by Nicole McAfree, Oklahoma’s leader of their LGBTQ advocacy group: “Nex should be alive, and the very least we can do in Nex’s memory is demonstrate our commitment to building a better world that makes it impossible for this heartbreaking tragedy to happen again.” [Source.]

So remember Nex Benedict. Don't let him be forgotten. Don't let him just become another statistic. Don't let anyone, any single person killed for their LGBTQ+ identity, become 'just a statistic.' Remember their names. Remember their faces. Remember.

I'd like to link resources for you if you're struggling like Nex was. The Trevor Project is the main resource for all LGBTQ+ people, where you can call, text, or chat someone. The Trans Lifeline is a 24/7 hotline available in the U.S. and Canada staffed by transgender people for transgender people. The Crisis Text Line is not strictly LGBTQ+ but is for anyone in crisis. And here you can find a list of LGBTQ+ organizations and programs, as well as where you can find LGBTQ+ friendly counseling.

Your life matters. You matter.

Happy Pride, and remember Nex Benedict.

from now on your tumblr nickname is whatever you get from this sexual identity generator  ☆