The Strongest Man And His War With Sleep :

A Pawn or a Player? { 3 }

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"Do you know what the most dangerous piece on the board is?

A pawn that refuses to stay one."

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Petyr Baelish never told me I was shaped.

He didn’t have to.

The thing about growing up in the shadow of a man like him is that you begin to understand silence better than words. You learn the meaning of a glance, the weight of a pause, the way power curls itself around a room like smoke, barely visible but impossible to ignore.

I was ten the first time he let me sit beside him while he played cyvasse against a visiting merchant.

It was not a lesson, not officially. Petyr never wasted time on things so direct.

But when the game was over and the merchant had left, my father turned to me and asked, as if it were nothing, “Did you see how I won?”

I hesitated. “You trapped his dragon.”

He laughed, shaking his head. “No, sweetling. I let him believe he was winning. Until he wasn’t.”

---

I learned quickly after that.

Petyr never told me to watch. But I did.

I watched the way he spoke to lords, all soft smiles and careful charm. I watched the way he moved through a room, unassuming yet ever-present. I watched the way people underestimated him, the way they dismissed him as nothing more than a minor lord with a sharp tongue and sharper ambition.

I watched the way he let them.

And I watched the way he won.

---

The first time I played cyvasse against him, I lost.

I was eleven, and I had thought myself clever. I moved my pieces with confidence, mirroring the strategy I had seen him use before.

He beat me in seven moves.

“Why? I asked, frowning at the board. “I did everything right.”

His fingers traced the edge of a pawn, thoughtful. “Did you?”

I looked again.

And then I saw it—the mistake. The opening I had left without realizing it.

The moment I had lost, before I even knew the game was over.

Petyr smiled, reaching out to smooth a hand over my hair, his touch as light as his voice. “You learn quickly, Rowan. But so do your enemies.”

---

I did not trust my father.

I respected him. I studied him.

But trust? No.

Petyr Baelish was not a man who inspired trust. He inspired awe, perhaps. Caution. Admiration, in the way one might admire a well-forged blade.

But never trust.

And he knew it.

Which was why, I think, he never asked me to.

---

I let him shape me. But only so far.

I let him teach me how to speak, how to smile, how to make a man believe I was harmless even as I unraveled his secrets.

But I also watched.

I watched him as much as he watched me.

Because if he was making me into a tool, then I needed to know what kind.

A dagger is not the same as a key. A shield is not the same as a lockpick.

And I did not intend to be used blindly.

-----

“You are too clever for your own good,” he told me once, when I was twelve.

I only smiled. “I wonder where I got it from.”

He laughed at that, shaking his head.

But he did not answer.

Because he knew.

And so did I.

—End of Chapter Three—

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Greetings, Dreamers and Readers ✨🌸

This chapter focuses heavily on Rowan and Petyr’s dynamic—the push and pull of power, trust, and manipulation between them. She plays the role he expects, but beneath it, she’s always watching, always learning. It’s a complicated relationship, built on something that resembles loyalty but is laced with too much calculation to be love.

I wanted to explore that tension—how much of her father’s influence she accepts, how much she resents, and how much she quietly resists.

---

Let me know what you think! Does their relationship feel as layered as I intended? Feel free to comment, share your thoughts, or ask any questions about Rowan!

✨Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨

okay so ngl I’m probably not gonna write these as good as I do for Gojo, Geto, or my sweet bbg Kento (character analysis just hits different with them), but I’ll try my best to ruin your emotions anyway. So, which one do I attempt next hmm ?

: The Language Of Flowers :

"People trust what is beautiful, what is soft. But flowers can poison, too." – Lily Calloway

---

"When I was little, my mother told me that good girls are loved, and bad girls are left behind. But I watched the world, and I learned—good girls get nothing. Smart girls take everything."

-----

Tucked away in the heart of Birmingham, Calloway’s Garden is a charming little shop where the air is thick with the scent of lilies, violets, and roses. People walk in for fresh-cut flowers, never questioning why some bouquets come wrapped in whispers and secrets. A flower shop is a good place for business—the real kind. The kind no one talks about.

---

"She’s a liar, but a useful one." – Thomas Shelby

---

Lily Calloway is not the woman people think she is. A social butterfly, warm and disarming, she knows exactly what to say to make people lean in, listen, trust. But beneath the charm is a mind that sees, calculates, and survives. She’s not cruel—cruelty is too messy, too blunt. She prefers subtlety, making people think they’re in control when she’s already three steps ahead.

-----

Theo Carter : He was her brother’s best friend. Now he’s hers. He came back from the war when Charles didn’t, and she doesn’t know if she keeps him close out of loyalty or something heavier.

Janifer Smith : Her partner-in-crime, her best friend, and sometimes the devil on her shoulder. They are two sides of the same coin—one soft-spoken, the other bold, but both dangerous in their own way.

---

Tommy Shelby?— She respects him, and he sees potential in her. But she knows what men like him do to people who get too close. And Lily Calloway? She wasn’t made to be anyone’s pawn.

-----

Writer’s Note:

So, this is my first-ever OC, and honestly? I have no idea what I’m doing, but we’re rolling with it. Lily Calloway has been living in my head rent-free for weeks, so it’s about time I let her loose into the world. She’s manipulative but not cruel, charming but not harmless, and definitely not the kind of woman you want to underestimate.

I’ll probably be dropping the first chapter in 2-3 days (if I don’t get distracted by life ). I have the whole story outlined—25 chapters, slow-burn, morally grey choices, and a whole lot of drama. So, if you’re into that, stick around.

--

Also, I’d love to hear your thoughts on Lily! Is she giving femme fatale or just a girl trying to survive in a man’s world? Maybe both. We’ll see.

✨ Bye and take care, Hope you all have a good day ✨

The Hands of a God-King :

Sukuna’s hands were never meant to be touched.

They were carved by power, molded for violence. Fingers meant for destruction, palms that know only the heat of blood, the crack of bone, the sharpness of steel.

And yet, they are scarred.

Not from battle—no one has ever been strong enough to leave a lasting wound on him—but from himself. From the weight of his own strength, from the countless times he has torn himself apart and stitched himself back together with sheer will alone.

His body is a temple built and rebuilt from ruin.

And his hands are the proof of it.

-----

The scars are strange things. Some thin as hairline cracks, others jagged, deep—memories of a power so vast it could not be contained, even within his own skin. He has felt his bones fracture under the pressure of it, muscles split, skin burned away, only to heal again, over and over, as if his body has long accepted that it will never truly be whole.

He doesn’t think about it. There’s no point.

It is what it is.

And yet—sometimes, when the world is quiet, when his hands are still, he can feel it. The ghosts of old wounds, the echoes of destruction.

The knowledge that his body is both indestructible and deeply, deeply broken.

-----

He doesn’t know when you first noticed.

Perhaps it was the way his fingers curled absentmindedly when he wasn’t using them. Perhaps it was the way he flexed them, as if reminding himself they were still there. Or maybe it was the way they traced over things—absent, almost thoughtful—when he thought no one was watching.

Whatever it was, you had noticed. And that was a problem.

Because people who noticed things about him usually didn’t live long.

And yet, there you were.

Watching. Thinking. Understanding something he did not want to be understood.

One night, as his fingers drummed idly against his knee, your gaze flickered down to his hands. The movement was so slight he almost didn’t catch it.

"Does it hurt?" you asked.

He had half a mind to ignore you. To dismiss it with a sneer, to tell you that pain was beneath him. But something about the way you said it—calm, certain, like you already knew the answer—made him pause.

And for just a moment, his hands stilled.

Then he laughed. Low, sharp, edged with something unreadable.

"You think a god suffers from something so trivial?"

But you didn’t back down.

"Gods suffer more than anyone, don’t they?"

And he should have struck you down for that. Should have reminded you of what he was, of what you were, and of how your words were nothing but fleeting air against the weight of his existence.

But he didn’t.

Instead, his fingers twitched.

And in that moment—so small, so insignificant he almost didn’t notice it himself—his hands curled, just slightly, as if remembering something they were not supposed to.

-----

Sukuna does not think about his hands.

Not in the way you do, with your quiet observations, your thoughtful little remarks.

But sometimes, when your gaze lingers on them—when your fingers brush against his in passing, when your touch lingers for just a second too long—he thinks about what they would have been in another life.

If they would have held instead of taken.

If they would have been human.

And then he laughs, because the thought is absurd. Because that life never existed, and never will.

But sometimes, when the world is quiet, when he lets his hands rest against you without thinking—when they do not tighten, do not wound, do not take—they do not feel like weapons.

If they would have built instead of destroyed.

They feel like hands.

And that is the cruelest trick of all.

-----

Greetings, Dreamers and Readers ✨🌸

Here I am—stupid little me—trying to make this walking catastrophe feel a little human again. Like that’s ever going to work.

If Sukuna knew I was sitting here, dissecting his hands like some tragic metaphor, he’d kill me before I even got to my second sentence. No hesitation. Just a flick of his fingers, a scoff, maybe an "Tch. Foolish human," and then—nothing. I’d be gone. Reduced to a smear on the ground, utterly irrelevant to a god-king who has never needed to justify a single thing he’s done.

But I don’t know. I keep coming back to it. His hands—scarred, precise, brutal—feel like they tell a story he has no interest in acknowledging. They’ve taken everything, ruined everything, but they’ve also rebuilt him over and over again. He’s been unmade by his own power more times than anyone else ever could, and yet, here he is. Still standing. Still undefeated. And if there’s one thing Sukuna hates, it’s the idea of anything having power over him.

So what does that mean for the hands that have both created him and destroyed him?

---

Anyway, those are just my thoughts. Maybe I’m reading too much into it. Maybe I should shut up before Sukuna manifests just to personally smite me. But hey, feel free to comment and share your thoughts—I’d love to hear what you think. And if you’ve got headcanons, send them my way. I might try writing them too.

Until then, I’ll just be here, waiting for the inevitable divine wrath.

✨ Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨

Greetings, Dreamers and Readers 🌸✨

so—wanna know where i’ve been all this time?

Well. school started. and it’s been exactly as soul-sucking and exhausting as you'd expect.

i’ve been floating through days like a ghost that didn’t even get a tragic backstory. just assignments.

but in between the mess, i ended up writing a few jjk meta pieces. not planned, not polished—just… thoughts that wouldn’t shut up. little rants. poetic breakdowns. trauma essays disguised as fandom content. you know the deal.

i’ll be posting them all by this evening—there’s like 2 or 3 for now. they’re less “analysis” and more “me yelling into the void about how the jujutsu society is evil and i would physically fight god to protect every broken, bloody, emotionally-damaged character in that show.” so yeah. feel free to read, scream, cry, or argue with me in the tags. i’m down for it all.

they’re not perfect. but they’re honest.

and weirdly enough, they feel like the most me thing i’ve written in a while.

see you in the ruins.

✨Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨

The Taste of Memory :

Sukuna does not eat because he needs to.

Not in the way humans do.

His existence is beyond such trivial things. He is a curse. A god, a monster, a thing carved out of legend and blood. His existence is not bound by mortal needs. He does not hunger the way humans hunger.

He has long surpassed the fragile demands of a mortal body.

And yet—

He still eats.

Not out of necessity, not even out of hunger, but out of something older. Something deeper.

Because the body remembers what the mind does not.

And though he may have forgotten what it is to be human, his tongue has not.

---

The first time you notice it, it almost seems insignificant.

A meal placed in front of him, a casual thing, something to pass the time. He looks at it, considers it, and then—

With an expression of pure disdain—

Pushes the plate toward you.

“Trash,” he says. “Eat it if you want.”

You blink. “You haven’t even tried it.”

“I don’t need to.” His mouth twists in something between disgust and condescension. “The smell alone tells me enough.”

You should have expected it. Should have known. Sukuna does not tolerate mediocrity, does not entertain anything that does not meet his impossible standards.

He holds himself above the world, and the world has never been worthy.

Still, you roll your eyes and take the plate.

It is not the first time.

It will not be the last.

---

He does this often.

Rejects food without hesitation, discarding anything that does not meet his unspoken, unreasonably high expectations.

Too bland. Too dry. Too greasy.

Too human.

It is not that he cannot eat. It is that he refuses to eat something unworthy of him.

He takes no pleasure in mediocrity.

He does not need to, does not have to, does not want to.

But then—

Sometimes, very rarely, something changes.

-----

It happens without fanfare.

A dish placed before him. The same routine, the same look of practiced indifference. He lifts his chopsticks, takes a bite, chews.

And then—

Nothing.

No complaint. No insult. No dramatic dismissal.

Just silence.

You glance at him, waiting, expecting the usual disapproval. But he keeps eating, slow, measured. And when he finishes, he sets his utensils down with the same detached carelessness as always.

“...Not bad,” he mutters, almost as if to himself.

And then, in a voice quieter, that is more grudging—

“Make it again.”

---

The second time, it is deliberate.

He does not shove the plate away. Does not scoff or sneer. He eats, and when he finishes, he leans back, watching you with something unreadable in his expression.

“Do you remember how you made this?” he asks.

There is something strange in his tone. Not interest, not curiosity—something else.

You nod.

He exhales through his nose, thoughtful, almost irritated at himself. “Good. Do it again.”

Not an order.

Not a demand.

A request.

Something he cannot take, only accept.

And that knowledge unsettles him more than anything else.

-----

Sukuna does not remember his last meal as a human.

That life is a blur, a ghost too distant to reach.

But his body remembers.

Remembers the feeling of warmth in his chest after something good. Remembers the weight of a meal that satisfies more than just hunger. Remembers the distant echo of something familiar, something lost.

It does not come often. But when it does—when a dish reminds him, however faintly, of something he cannot name—

He does not know what to do with it.

Does not know how to exist in a moment that is not about power, or blood, or war.

Does not know how to want something that is not destruction.

So he says nothing.

But the next day, he asks again.

“You’re making that thing.”

And you do.

-----

Greetings, Dreamers and Readers ✨🌸

Another Sukuna piece for you all—this one feels like tasting something from your childhood. You know, that one dish you used to eat all the time, only to have it again years later and realize it doesn’t just taste like food—it tastes like a memory. Like a time, a place, a feeling you can’t quite name.

Except here, it’s Sukuna, and nothing is ever that simple. It’s not just nostalgia—it’s something buried, something almost forgotten, something he probably doesn’t want to remember but does anyway. And of course, because he’s him, it’s a whole lot more complicated (and God-King-like) than just reminiscing.

---

Anyway, let me know what you think! I’d love to hear your thoughts on this one. Feel free to comment or send me ideas—you know I love them.

✨ Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨

The Loneliest Person in the Room Always Talks the Loudest :

Gojo Satoru talks like the world will stop spinning if he shuts up.

You noticed it the first time you met him, back when he was just your classmate, your friend—before you realized that being near him felt like standing too close to the sun. He had this way of making noise like he was afraid of what would happen if there wasn’t any. A running commentary on things that didn’t matter. Complaints about the cafeteria food. Arguments over what counted as a dessert. Long, convoluted rants about how nobody appreciated his genius.

At first, you thought he was just like that. Loud. Annoying, even. The kind of person who didn’t care if people were listening, as long as he was the one talking.

It took you longer than you’d like to admit to realize that he only filled the silence because he was terrified of it.

Because silence meant thinking. And thinking meant remembering. And remembering—

Well. That wasn’t something Gojo Satoru liked to do.

-----

Somewhere along the way, you learned how to read between the lines.

How his voice was always just a little too high-pitched when he was lying. How he made fun of things when he wanted to pretend they didn’t matter. How his laugh was just a little bit too loud, a little too sharp, like he was daring you to believe he was as happy as he sounded.

How, sometimes, when he thought nobody was looking, he would get this look in his eyes—something far away, something quiet.

The first time you saw it, you thought maybe he was just tired. Maybe he wasn’t sleeping well. But then it happened again. And again. And then, one day, in a moment of rare honesty, he said something you weren’t expecting.

"It’s funny, y’know?" he’d said, tilting his head back against the wall, the light catching on his blindfold in a way that made it impossible to tell if his eyes were open or closed.

"I can hear everything. Every heartbeat, every whisper, every single sound in a mile radius. And still, sometimes, it feels like I’m the only person in the room."

---

You don’t know when you started seeing him for what he really was.

Not Gojo Satoru, the loud-mouthed idiot with a god complex.

Not Gojo Satoru, the strongest sorcerer alive, the untouchable, the unkillable.

Just Gojo Satoru.

The boy who talked too much because silence was unbearable. The boy who smiled too much because frowning would make it real. The boy who laughed too much because, if he stopped, he wasn’t sure if he would ever start again.

Gojo Satoru, who could kill a god but couldn’t hold onto the people he loved.

Gojo Satoru, who had spent his whole life outrunning grief, only to realize that no matter how fast he moved, it would always be waiting for him at the end of the road.

---

"Do you ever get tired of it?" you asked him once.

"Of what?"

"The act."

Gojo grinned. "What act?"

You rolled your eyes. "The one where you pretend none of this matters. The one where you pretend you’re not—" lonely "—carrying the weight of the world on your back."

Something flickered across his face, there and gone in an instant. If you hadn’t been watching for it, you wouldn’t have noticed it at all.

Then he laughed.

"Oh, please," he said, stretching his arms over his head. "You think I do all this for fun? I’m naturally this charming."

"Liar," you said softly.

Gojo Satoru looked at you then, really looked at you, and for a second, you thought maybe he was going to tell you the truth. Maybe he was going to say that, yeah, sometimes it was exhausting. Sometimes, when he was alone, he didn’t even turn on music because the silence was better than hearing his own voice echoing back at him.

But then he smirked.

"Yeah, well," he said, standing up and stretching. "If I talked less, you’d miss me."

He left before you could tell him that you already did.

---

But sometimes—sometimes—you wake up in the middle of the night and find him still asleep.

And he looks different, then.

Gojo Satoru, who is always moving, always talking, always on, is finally still.

And in that stillness, he looks almost human.

Almost breakable.

You never wake him up.

Because you know that as soon as he opens his eyes, the act will start all over again.

---

"You know," you say one night, when the city is quiet and Gojo Satoru is sitting on your couch, blindfold pushed up, staring at the ceiling like it holds the answers to a question he hasn’t figured out how to ask. "You don’t have to be on all the time."

He hums. "I don’t know what you mean."

"Yeah, you do."

Gojo tilts his head, a slow, lazy movement, like he’s thinking about something too big to fit inside words. "If I stop," he says finally, "then what?"

(You don’t answer.)

Because you don’t know.

Because maybe he doesn’t, either.

So you sit beside him instead, close enough that he could touch you if he wanted to. Close enough that he could feel you there.

And maybe that’s enough.

Maybe, for once, Gojo Satoru doesn’t have to fill the silence.

Maybe he can just exist.

Maybe, for once, he doesn’t have to be alone.

---

You never say it out loud.

But some part of you thinks that Gojo Satoru talks so much because he’s trying to drown something out.

And maybe, just maybe—

He’s waiting for someone to listen.

-----

Greetings, Dreamers and Readers ✨🌸

You ever look at Gojo in that Toji scene and feel something uncomfortably close to pity? Not the kind you give to someone weak, but the kind that comes when you see someone who should’ve had a chance to be something else. Because that kid—that Gojo Satoru—was raw. Serious. The kind of serious that a boy his age shouldn’t have been. His face wasn’t blank, but it wasn’t guarded either. He was just there, fully present in the moment, taking the world in as it was. And maybe, back then, he still thought he was a part of it.

But fast forward a few years, and suddenly he’s the loudest guy in the room. A boy who never really grew up, at least not in the way that mattered. A boy who talks too much, laughs too hard, makes a joke out of everything—because the alternative is what exactly? Silence? Reflection? Feeling?

It makes you wonder. —What did he suffer, to look at the world and decide that maybe it wasn’t worth his real emotions? What did he lose to become someone who only lets himself exist through noise?

And the worst part? —Nobody even asks. Because Gojo Satoru is fine, right? Because he smiles. Because he jokes. Because he’s the strongest, and people like that don’t need to be understood.

But if you look closely—if you really pay attention—you’ll see it. He’s been holding the world at arm’s length for a long, long time.

--

Anyways I'll love to hear your thoughts on this one shot and do you too know people who like being the center of attention but for a complete different reason

✨ Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨

Gate, Gate—

(gone, gone beyond)

They brought him to the temple like people leave things at riverbanks.

A last attempt. A gentle abandonment dressed in incense.

“He has something wrong in him,” the mother whispered.

Or maybe it was the aunt.

Or maybe no one said anything at all. Maybe they just looked.

The monks accepted him like they accepted stray dogs and dying birds.

With open hands and quiet eyes.

He was six. Or seven. Thin. Quiet.

Too quiet.

He didn’t cry when they shaved his head.

Didn’t flinch when they poured the cold water down his spine.

He just stared at the stone floor like it had spoken to him in a language no one else could hear.

-----

The temple was kind. In theory.

They rose at dawn, washed in silence, chanted in circles.

Everything smelled of sandalwood and routine.

Things were clean here. Predictable.

But Sukuna?

He was not a creature of clean things.

He learned fast. Too fast.

By the second week, he was sitting longer in meditation than boys twice his age.

By the third, he had the Heart Sutra memorized.

By the fourth, he could mimic the chants with a tone so exact it felt mocking.

Not cruel—just empty.

One of the older monks said, “He’s gifted.”

Another muttered, “He’s hollow.”

(Both were right.)

-----

They named him Reien. (Distant Flame.)

He never used it.

When called, he looked up slowly, like surfacing from somewhere deeper.

He didn’t smile. Didn’t play.

Didn’t cry when the others whispered things like witch-child or thing with teeth.

He once told another boy during chores,

“I think people hope temples make monsters polite.”

The boy blinked.

Sukuna shrugged, soft and almost gentle.

“But I was never rude. Just honest.”

-----

The monks thought perhaps routine would save him.

Structure. Compassion. Years of stillness pressed into his ribs until something softened.

But it never did.

He lit the incense with perfect fingers, poured tea without spilling a drop.

He knelt so still he looked like a statue left behind by an older god.

And when he whispered the sutras?

They sounded like elegies.

Like grief recited backward.

-----

There was one monk.

Old.

Kind.

Tired in the way that made you trust him.

He brought Sukuna extra rice on cold mornings.

Helped him adjust his robes when no one else would get too close.

Once, he said,

“You remind me of a bell before it rings.”

Sukuna looked up.

“You’re waiting for something,” the monk said. “I don’t know what. But I hope it’s peace.”

Sukuna didn’t answer. But later that night, he buried the monk’s prayer beads under the snow.

Not out of malice.

He just didn’t want anyone to believe too much in rescue.

-----

Years passed.

Sukuna grew. Not into someone better. Just someone more.

More silent. More watchful.

His eyes started to scare people.

He never raised his voice.

Never raised a hand.

But once, when a boy shoved him during chores, Sukuna whispered something into the boy’s ear.

No one knows what was said.

But the boy never spoke again.

-----

Sometimes he would sit under the Bodhi tree at night, alone.

Whispering pieces of chants.

Not the full sutras. Just fragments. Broken syllables that didn’t fit together.

“Form is emptiness…” he’d murmur.

“…emptiness is form.”

Then laugh to himself, soft and cruel and tired.

It wasn’t joy. It wasn’t madness.

It was a boy telling a joke no one else understood.

-----

Once, a traveling girl came with her father, a rice merchant.

She sat beside him at lunch and offered him a peach.

He stared at her.

“You don’t talk much,” she said.

He blinked.

“Are you sad?” she asked.

He didn’t answer. Just took the peach and held it like a thing he’d never earned.

She grinned. “I think you’re pretending to be a monk.”

That night, he didn’t sleep.

He just stared at the peach pit in his hand for hours, wondering why it made him feel anything at all.

She never came back.

And that was the first time he realized—

Even kindness leaves.

-----

The breaking didn’t happen all at once.

Not like a sword through the ribs.

More like water over stone.

Small cracks.

Soft erosion.

A boy watching compassion become something quiet and useless.

-----

One winter, he found a bird dying in the courtyard.

It was shaking. Mouth open. Tiny heart fighting too hard.

He sat with it for an hour. Just watching.

Didn’t touch it.

Didn’t help.

Didn’t look away.

When it stopped breathing, he buried it with his bare hands.

And whispered the full Heart Sutra over its grave.

The first and only time he ever said it with feeling.

-----

Later, when the elder monk was dying from fever, Sukuna sat beside him.

The monk wheezed, clinging to prayer beads with pale hands.

He said, “Do you believe in rebirth?”

Sukuna stared.

“Maybe you’ll come back as something… softer.”

Sukuna leaned in, voice gentle and cruel:

“This is my second life. I think I was something softer before.”

(The monk wept.)

-----

He left soon after.

No one remembers how.

Some say he disappeared into the snow.

Some say the temple doors opened and never closed again.

Some say he burned it all.

But here’s what’s true:

He carried the chants with him.

Not because he believed.

But because belief was the first lie anyone ever told him.

-----

And now?

Now he walks like a God who doesn’t want worship.

Kills like someone remembering something ancient.

Speaks in riddles and old truths.

Sometimes, before a battle, when the wind is just right,

he mumbles a chant to himself :

“Gate, gate, pāragate…”

Gone. Gone. Gone beyond.

He always pauses after that.

Not out of reverence.

Out of memory.

Out of the sound of snow falling on temple roofs.

Out of the soft weight of a peach in his hand.

Out of the silence after a dying bird stops shaking.

He doesn’t say the last line.

Not anymore.

Because it was never for him.

And he knows, with a kind of terrible peace:

Not everything is meant to be saved.

-----

Greetings, Dreamers and Readers ✨🌸

I don’t think I meant to make this version of Sukuna. It just… happened. I kept circling this quiet idea of a boy left at a temple like an afterthought—like maybe someone thought peace could be taught into him, like sutras could smooth out what was already unraveling inside.

This isn’t about battles or glory or blood. It’s about stillness. About a boy who memorized all the sacred words but none of them saved him. About silence, routine, ritual. About being watched, studied, never understood.

I didn’t want him to be tragic in a loud, dramatic way. I wanted the ache to be quiet. Familiar. Like bruises you don’t notice until someone touches them.

There’s something that haunts me about characters who know how to sit still but not how to be comforted. Who learn everything except how to ask for help. Who are full of language but empty of meaning. I think some part of me understands them too well.

So yeah… this version of Sukuna? He’s not softer. He’s just more human in a way that hurts.

---

Anyway. If you made it this far, thank you. Feel free to comment and share your thoughts—I’d love to hear your opinions. You guys always see things I missed.

✨ Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨

Sukuna’s Reflection :

Sukuna does not linger in front of mirrors.

It is not because he fears what he sees. Fear is for lesser things—mortals who cower before their own shadows, kings who wake in cold sweat at the thought of losing their crowns. He is not them. He is not afraid.

But he does not look for long.

Because there was a time when his face was different. A time before he had four eyes and a mouth that split his body like a curse.

A time before he became something whispered about in the dark.

And though he does not regret it, there are moments—quiet, fleeting—where he wonders.

What would he have been if he had chosen differently? Would he still be feared?

Or would he simply be forgotten?

---

Once, long ago, he had a face that belonged to a man.

He remembers it only in fragments. A glimpse in the still water of a river. The shadow of it in dreams that do not belong to him. A sensation—muscles stretching over bone in a way that no longer feels familiar.

It is a strange thing, to forget your own features. To remember only the weight of them, the absence of them, rather than the thing itself.

But that is what he is now. A body made and unmade by his own hands. A temple built from ruin.

And temples are not meant to be beautiful. They are meant to be worshiped.

---

There are no mirrors in the places Sukuna calls his own.

Not because he cannot bear to see himself—no, that would be too human, too weak—but because he has no need for them. He does not need a reflection to know what he is. He can see it in the way people look at him. In the way they refuse to meet his gaze, as if to do so would invite death.

He is written across history in the blood of the fallen. That is proof enough of his existence.

And yet.

And yet, sometimes, he catches himself in the polished steel of a blade, in the dark glass of a window, in the eyes of those who do not yet understand what they are looking at.

And for just a moment, he sees not what he is, but what he was.

Not the King of Curses. Not the monster.

Just a man.

---

"You look like you’ve seen a ghost," you say one day, and he nearly laughs.

Because he has.

Because in every reflection, in every ripple of water, there is something half-familiar staring back.

The remnants of a boy who was born in blood and grew into something worse.

The bones of a man who once might have been kind, if kindness had ever been an option.

The shadow of someone he no longer recognizes.

And isn’t that the funny part?

He has spent centuries carving his name into the world, forcing people to remember him, fear him, and yet—

He is the only one who cannot remember himself.

---

Sukuna tilts his head, studying his reflection with a faint, unreadable expression. He watches the way his second mouth curls into a sneer of its own accord. The way his extra eyes blink a fraction too slow, out of sync with the rest of him.

It is a face made for terror. A thing meant to be seen and feared, not understood.

And still—there is something missing.

Not regret. Never regret.

But a question.

Would he have been happy?

If he had chosen differently, if he had not become this, would there have been joy? Would there have been laughter, something real and full instead of the sharp, cruel thing he lets slip past his lips now?

Or would he have faded into obscurity, just another nameless fool in a world that does not care?

Would he rather be a forgotten man or a remembered monster?

The answer should be easy.

It should be.

But in moments like this, when he stands before a mirror and sees something that does not belong to him, he is not so sure.

-----

Greetings, Dreamers and Readers ✨🌸

Look, I know I write Sukuna with a lot of philosophy, but I don’t think I’ve fully understood him yet. Every time I try, he ends up a little too lost, a little too weighed down, and I know that’s not quite right. Sukuna isn’t the type to sit in a corner and sulk about the meaning of his existence—if he ever caught me writing him like this, I’d be dead before I could even start explaining myself.

Like, picture it: I’m standing there, notebook in hand, ready to argue about his inner demons, and he just looks at me—amused, vaguely disgusted—before shaking his head and flicking his wrist. Ah, foolish little woman. And then I’m gone. Just a thought, just dust.

But hey, he’s not here to do any of that, so here I am, rambling away.

---

And that’s where you come in. Tell me—am I getting him right? Or am I making him too introspective, too… human? Is there something in Sukuna that justifies this angle, or am I just trying to squeeze meaning out of something that doesn’t need it? Let me know. Let’s figure out this god-king together.

✨ Bye and take care, hope you all have a good day ✨