It’s 2022 And I’m Writing A Political Theory Paper On Self-determination Only To Realize This Is

Achilles: Hey Briseis, I heard u wanted to marry my boyfriend

Briseis: Yes, do you have a problem with that?

Achilles: I believe the way i should describe it is, finders keepers.

I wish I fit into college major boxes as well as this cat.

-A Public Health Interdisiplinary Major (who really just wants to be an appreciated member of a theatre cast AND CANT FUCKING JUST CHOOSE A THING AND BE OK WITH JUST LIKING YHE ONE THING)

To the dads we found along the way

Father's Day

Zagreus (according to patzagchilles shippers): omg i wanna bang Achilles and Patroclus

Me: HAVE YOU LOOKED AT THESE MEN YOU’RE THIRD WHEELING SO HARD

no seriously ship what u want im just confused

more silly hAAdes stuff ... promise its out of my system now 🫶

lmao line diagrams

biologists will be like this is a very simplified diagram of a mammalian cell

chemists will be like this is a molecule

i think ive been the victim of queerbaiting to the point were the couples i care about never kiss so its never been like…a thing i check off on the ship bingo card if that makes sense

kissing has never been expected out of any of my ships and now AZIRAPHALE AND CROWLEY WALTZ IN LIKE OOOO IMMA BOUT TO END THIS GIRLS CAREER (and bingo card)

Hades II headcannon

Melinoë: Zagreus! What are you doing at father’s desk!? *He still refuses to sit down on chairs*

Zag: WHY DOES FATHER HAVE SO MUCH PAPERWORK?! am i supposed to sign something- or like decree a new rule? how does one make a pact?!

Mel: …are you running the underworld while father’s in prison?

Zag: is thiS ShAdE SUEinG mE FoR all THE pOTS I’ve BROKEN?!?!

Mel: I’m just going to uhm…go now

in which phoenix gets addicted to hades for a bit. guess who his favourite character is

Plato: "My deal justice system would have made all pre-marital sex, heterosexual or not, illegal." sounds kinda incel to me ngl