You Are Just As Beautiful As The Moon. If You Say You’re Not Beautiful Then You Would Also Be Saying

Dad: I'm dragon

Mom: dragon? I hardly know her?

anyone: what state are you from?

me: plasma

i am a straight female but there is a really cute girl in my womens studies class. is it appropriate to tell her that i think shes hot as hell?

I’m writing a Harry Potter au in my head. So far my favorite change is that There was no Battle of Hogwarts. Instead, a couple years later, when Harry in an auror, he gets an assignment to track down Voldemort. Since he’s so magic dependent when they find him the break his wand and set him on the muggle world. (This is before Hermione is in office). And a couple days later he’s arrested for running around a public park screaming about “why can’t I kill that stupid child!” He later gets shanked and killed in prison after molesting a fellow inmate.

ive seen a bunch of things where its like “murder is not the answer. its a question and the anwer is yes.” but how about murder is a rhetorical question. murder? we’ll never know. theres no real answer. 

stealing peoples limbs is not very christ like

I just wanna come back to this later I know gosh said don’t but I’m doing it anyways

please learn how to code

like, if you're bored today, and not doing anything,

learn a little bit of coding please

In case anyone was wondering I really hate guns

So I got home and my brothers friends are over and one of them was like “want a pumpkin spice cookie I made?” And it took me a second to think about it because it caught me off guard and I was spacing out and she goes “it’s not laced” and like, I didn’t expect it to be but now I’m kinda sus of it.

Im not planning on going to hell but if I end up there I’m gonna find Satan and ask “did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” I just wanna know his reaction.