The One Where Bruce Is The Asshole (again)

Danny, a young and burgeoning Ancient of Space, has a hobby. He eats universes.

Which isn't as bad as it sounds!

He finds universes on the verge of destruction, about to be destroyed by faulty timelines or world ending events that managed to effect the entire universe, and devours them.

One quick swallow, and they're a part of his core, separated from the dangers of the destabilizing event, safe and sound and guarded, and able to grow and thrive.

This is why multiversal travel is possible for some DC universes-because they're all in Danny's core.

To save them, he ate them.

Once they are absorbed into his core, his own nature helps shape them as they heal. He has hope, he is protective, and he is separate from the medium in which all universes are held, making his core less rigid to the rules of the Speedforce.

Of course, he also holds some bad apples that snuck their way in, but he can't really do anything about them. That's up to the residents of the universes those bad apples threaten. Danny already did all he could.

At least there's a universe for those heroes to try to save.

And when he sleeps, he gets to explore those universes within himself.

Unfortunately, the Justice League in one of those universes has heard of an ancient being that eats entire universes, and that's the extent of their knowledge about it.

They don't realize they've already been eaten, and that said being is protecting them.

Danny has a vacation house on the Moon. So far, it's been a nice, quiet place to hang out.

He just...moved a small portion of his Haunt in the Ghost Zone to the Moon. There's some spectre deflectors to shield it from the sun whenever the suns rays beat down mercilessly on the house, as well as keep heat in during the cold when the sun isn't there, but it's pefect!

In fact, he's altered the spectre deflectors so that they make it a perfectly habitable area around his house. Breathable air and everything.

Also, small mention, but he can listen to Justice League transmissions this close to their Watchtower. Not that he does.

Except maybe he does.

Just a little bit.

And one day, there's a desperate cry for help.

A human Hero, one who cannot handle the nothingness of Space, has a cracked helmet and is losing air.

Danny...really doesn't want to do this. He likes his little hidey hole!

But.

Fuck.

"Hey, so I've been listening-wait don't block me! I have a weird question; how close are you to the moon?"

(Got a brain worm that I had to write. No plans to continue so feel free to take for yourself)

Batman was responding to reports of Harley Quinn running around Gotham. Joker had been put back in Arkham several months ago so there was a chance she was making a move to set him free again.

But apparently Harley was expecting him.

"Well finally! You sure know how to keep a gal waiting Batsy. Ive been running around all night waitin for ya."

When Harley turned to face him his eyes were immediately drawn to her stomach.

"You're pregnant..."

"Yeesh your manners are bad ya cant just say that!" Harley rolled her eyes before pausing with a sigh and a serious look that almost seemed out of place on her, "But yeah... I am."

"Joker?" Batman asked softly.

Harley nodded, "Thats why I was runnin around tonight. Wanted to get your attention." She looked down before continuing, "I was in denial about it at first. I was always careful with that birth control stuff ya know? And I didn't want it to be real. Before I knew it it was too late to... you know... but. But I dont think I coulda anyway. I know its selfish but I love em too much already. Thats why I need your help."

"I'll help in anyway I can." Batman told her, "I can set up a place for the two of you where Joker won't find you."

Harley shook her head, "No can do Batsy. Mista J wouldn't let me go that easy. Specially if he knows about my little puddin. And if I'm honest I love him too much to leave too.

"I need someplace to have 'im that won't tell. And... I want you to look out for him. Not like, take 'im in or nothing. If I see my baby runnin around as one of your birds in ten years I'll let you have it-" She sighed, "But find someplace away from Gotham and all this. I don't want this for my little puddin. I don't want him to turn out like me or Joker and his best chance is someplace else.

"Please Batman."

-

Bruce kept his promise to Harley. She gave birth in secret and Daniel was taken to the other side of the country to be left at a firestation with nothing but his name and a note from Harley saying she loved him.

When Daniel was adopted Bruce ran a background check on his new parents. Inventors who seemed to be researching some sort of renewable energy and already had a child. Seemed safe enough.

He checked the area when they moved to a small town in Illinois and it seemed safe enough even with the likely tourist trap of "most haunted town in America"

Daniel, or Danny as he seemed to prefer, got decent grades and had a few close friends. His grades dropped suddenly for a time but eventually they returned to their previous state so he didn't worry too much.

But when the boy applied to and was accepted into Gotham U, Bruce started to worry.

They had left Danny as far away from Gotham as possible. So what were the chances he should return?

Tim woke up after a very overdue nap to a see a toddler playing minesweeper on his supercomputer in one of his emergency bunkers in gotahm.

"You're awake! I got that coffee you wanted." Said the literal adopted bait in a hospital gown. He push aside the rolling chair and pick up a plastic cup tray with four Death Coffee from the Cafe that he literally banned off from Bruce bribing them all.

Tim look like he could cry as he snatch the coffee mug and inhale the sweet sweet scent of caffeine addiction. Sipping it every now and then as he speak to the kid.

"Um.. so how did we met again,..?" Tim asked cause his deprived coffee brain doesn't remember yesterday trauma of going to every Cafe in Gotham that told him he was banned from then until Bruce said it was OK.

"It's danny, and you look like you were going through obsession deprivation near the abandoned warehouse next to that fancy car, blabbering about dam- dang interventions, they can't stop me from having coffee and I asked if I can get you some coffee?

Then you shoved 3000 dollars in my face with the second crazed yet scariest look I ever seen, but i did got your coffee and you cried, but told me not to tell anyone then pick me up as a anti-intervention accompline, you drove us into this cool bunker then passed out after drinking 3 of the 6 coffee, and I started playing minesweeper on your computer, though weak password by the way." Danny said going back to playing minesweeper, nibbling on a chocolate muffin from that Cafe.

"So far 10 outta 10 kidnapping experience though, at least you didn't try to adopt me like the previous Fruitloop before, plus I got money out of it to last 8 months out there." Danny continued saying as he had literally beat Tim's minesweeper record.

Feral Bruce Wayne clone meets scared ghost child locked under max security.

You see, this clone is technically about a probable three months old, but is physically an 18-year-old. Why was he made? His creators wished to test and perfect their cloning technology before moving onto their prime subject, as for how they acquired the DNA of a Bruce Wayne he'd never know.

For some odd, odd reason, he had a plethora of fighting skills under his belt ingrained in his muscles, only really held back by his mind that didn't know how to use said skills to their highest degree. But it was apparently enough to break free, steal their most prized 'material' from under their nose, and escape.

They should've just got good tbh.

So now he had a kid (who was actually older than him) under his belt that he decides to take care of. Said kid was pretty good at making things, didn't want to go outside, or interact with other people if he could help it when they decided to occupy a warehouse they managed to buy for cheap (Cough, cough, Reuben may or may not have threatened them, slightly.) and it was up to Reuben to acquire both money and items to renovate the warehouse.

Fun.

Easy way to get money? Rob people. Easy way to get money without making his... friend? Judge him is to rob people who tried to rob him first.

Isn't much, but it is easy money.

That, and a lot of odd jobs here and there, usually goes out wearing a mask to hide his face. Really only to hide from his creators if they ever decided to go looking for him and, let's face it, he literally stole their most prized subject without their knowledge, of course they're looking for him.

Unfortunately for him, while his fighting skills are top-notch, his judgement getting better from the number of fights he partakes in. His emotional understanding and social skills are basically almost null and void, so most of his interactions with everyone- especially Danny, is pretty awkward when he isn't threatening people.

And he would never threaten Danny.

Anywho, he's been racking in a steady flow of cash, then got himself involved in an underground fighting ring and, well, it just expanded from there, with his being regarded as a 'Dark Horse' (whatever that is) and then quickly overthrowing the champion and becoming a good undefeated so far.

At least he now has money to buy furniture, food, clothes, and parts for whenever Danny got a bit too twitchy so he can build whatever his heart desires. Best thing about the underground fighting ring? They don't give a shit about what kind of weapon he brings, or if he has armor.

And lucky for him, he has himself a little genius who would very willingly make him such things while also being his test subject for them.

Ya'll remember Ace? Bat-hound?

No WAY Cujo became a Ghost and He did not.

Is he a little lost? Maybe. This is not his beautiful home. This is not his beautiful, maladjusted, Bat Family. Who are you people!? Where IS he!? This place is FAR to cheerful and green to be Gotham!

But he is Bat-Hound. A PROFESSIONAL. A HERO. He can handle this. He just has to track his humans down... through... whatever this is. If Krypto can fly, bless his mostly empty, hyperactive head, then so should he! It can't be THAT har-*Thwonk!*

.....no one saw that.

But what's this? A helpful young pup? Cujo you say. Ah, he too, was once a gaurd dog. Cujo, lad, he seems to be lost. Could you...? You WILL! Fantastic. But wait? You're worried about your Young Human?

*Bat Concern Rising* *Doggy eye squint*

WHY?

*cujo spills the frankly horrifying beans about Danny's home life*

.........ha ha, NOPE! We can be having THAT! He's coming too! Bruce LOVES young humans! Especially sassy ones. He'll adopt him in no time! You grab the older one's, I'll grab the baby. Then we can head home, yes? You'll love gotham! Plenty of scoundrels to chase!

Cut to the Bat family. Damian is training Titus in the yard. Rare sun-ish day. It's a cook out. The Kent's are over. When?

Titus and the Supers both perk up. You hear that? Somethings about to-

*reality RIPS* *Ace the Bat Hound, dead for over a decade, jumps through... THE SIZE OF A HORSE. He is holding a struggling small preteen girl in his mouth* *Splat*

He dropped her. Eeeeeeew! She is loudly protesting. There is a SECOND dog. Green. Two more teens, clearly related to the first. Dumped on Bruce's lawn.

Ace looks proud of himself. Shrinks to normal size and pads over. Plops down in front of Bruce like he'd never left, tail wagging. Still in costume. He's glowing.

The burgers burn on the grill. No one can bring themselves to notice or care. Damian is elated. Krypto is fly wrestling is bestest buddy. Bruce is having a nervous breakdown over his dead dog.

Clark is calling their co-workers and trying to STOP the nervous break down.

Lois is just feeding the strage kids the dogs brought. Asking some casual "I'm totally not an investigative reporter" type questions. Who wants chips? Have a towel.

Ace? Is a Good Boy. 🐶

@hypewinter @hdgnj @nerdpoe @ailithnight

I finally have a title!!!

I’ve been rolling a Danny adopted by Martian manhunter fic around in my head but I couldn’t figure out a good title!!!

Eventually I’ll post it but it’s gonna be called “Legally a Martian”

Sneak peak:

Danny rummaged around the cabinets searching for something to eat. The first cabinet he found was full of Oreos, while tempted to snack Danny was hoping to get something a bit more filling. However after the third cabinet of off brand Oreos he began to worry about his hosts sanity (though who was he to judge?)

He was staring into the freezer full of cookies when he heard his host enter the room.

“Do you have anything other than Oreos????” Danny asked, clearly befuddled.

“Chocos, and no. I had melons but you killed them.” J’onn grinned

Danny mourned the melons he so brutally murdered as he pulled out a pack of chocos to munch on.

That’s all for now!!

Haunting Heroes DPxDC. December 22: Baking

Right before Christmas movie night, the power went out at the Manor. Dick was hysterical. Yeah, Tim's laptop still had enough charge for at least one movie. The real problem was that the Traditional Xmas Bat Cookies weren't ready. And Nightwing wasn't going to accept that they would have to spend that evening eating store-bought ones. Dan adjusts his Santa cap and indignantly hurries the birds and bats. "Leave the poor dough alone. Bruce will soon sort out the breakdown anyway. Go watch the Grinch or I'll turn on Saw and drain your laptop's battery so you'll just be staring at the wall for the rest of the night." Jason, with the confidence of a man who has come up with a brilliant idea, grabs a strand of Phantom’s hair that has escaped from under the red cap and pulls. "You! You are a solution to the problem."

~~~~~ Dan: Auch, I prefer to be part of the problem, thanks. Jason: Come on, take off your sweater and give us some warmth. Dan: First take me on at least one date, brat. Danny: Actually, that's a great idea. You can warm up your core to the desired temperature, right? Just lie there with a sheet of biscuits on your chest for about twenty minutes and Dick will leave you alone. Dan: I refuse to act as an oven! ~~~~~ Also Bruce, who an hour later comes into the kitchen and sees the children sitting in a circle near lying on the floor Dan like a sect: “..You all know that we have a backup energy source, right?” Tim, who is tired of trying to persuade Dan to warm up another cup of coffee: Mother of f..

Soooo this hit me earlier-

Phantom and Robin (Dick) being friends, maybe meet during a Teen Titan mission and Robin never told the Adult Leaguers about Phantom and his city cause Phantom asked him not too? Perhaps not wanting someone to get possessed or just Jaded Amity from someone not taking their calls seriously.

Anyway- Dick doesn't hear from Phantom for years, possibly both accidently drop out of contact due to hectic lives on both sides, Dick jut getting started as Nightwing and Phantom is dealing with the GIW.

Not until Tim is Robin and both YJ and TT are thrown off by this strange glowing entity shows up at the Tower bleeding Lazarus Water and asking for Nightwing.

Dick is surprised over how much Phantom had changed. Gone was the hazmat suit and short frame. Now his old friend was nearly taller then him, still built for aerial flight yet it was as if his limbs were just a tad too long the more he looked. Especially when he noticed the ragged claws that poked through his ripped gloves...

Which makes him realize the hazmat suit wasn't gone, it was simply ripped and torn to rags and Phantom had patched it with other materials or simply wrapped bandages around the exposed parts and was wearing a tattered purple cloak over the rest. It also drew his attention to how inhuman Phantom now looked, how wide and feral his eyes were-how now they were fully radioactive green swirling with electric blue, how his skin was stretched tight over muscles and cracked in some places which were blackened with frostbite, how his smile was filled with sharp teeth and stretched just too wide to be normal, his face now wrapped in bandages partially as if to hide how inhuman he had become, the bandages blending in with his long white hair that crackled like electricity and flaked like snow or the tail of a comet. How he was only shorter then Nightwing due to standing hunched over and how twisted his legs looked when not a ghostly tail.

Something had happened and it had drastically changed the protective Ghost.

Nightwing: Phantom-

Danny: *grimace* I go by Wraith now...

Nightwing paused as he realized that his friends voice now sounded like the shattering of ice mixed with the howls of mountain winds.

Nightwing: ...Danny why are you here?

Wraith sighs and hands him a cloth covered bundle which Nightwing unwrapped to reveal a glowing dagger made of green metal that would look like Kryptonite if not for the darker green.

Wraith: The GIW...they wiped Amity off the map...everyone is gone

Nightwing: Danny...we can help

Wraith: *shakes head* No...I need you to only do one thing...after I take them down..

Nightwing: No

Wraith: *closes Nightwings hands over th dagger ignoring how his own skin sizzles from being so close* I need you to end me.

Wraith leaves as Nightwing protests: I'll be at our spot once it's over.

Ghost are dragons.

Except.

Danny gets dropped into the DC universe, how I don't know nor care really to figure out, in dragon form and the first person he runs into happens to be one Billy Batson.

Who adopts him.

Kinda tried to hide his Shazam thing at first, something about a secret identity but it didn't work out too well so Danny just knows he's Shazam but doesn't care.

Danny has never come out of dragon form before.

Danny is a tiny dragon.

Billy has a sense of humor.

So does Danny.

Shenanigans.