The End Will Justify It All - Chapter 3
The End Will Justify It All - Chapter 3
A Negan Series
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Warnings - not too much in this one. Adult themes and some language.
Feedback is always welcome! This series is challenging me for sure, and I'm loving it. Every time I work on it it gets a little longer and starts heading a direction that was unexpected even to me. I hope you'll hang in with me! I think it'll be worth it in the end.
Three days. That’s how long she’d been here. Three days of watching, waiting, learning. Three exhausting days of pretending to want to be one of them and taking advantage of every second alone to search for Daryl, which hadn’t been many. Between the dinners with Negan, and being stuck in the wives’ room, she had only had a few hours yesteday and today to explore. Three damn days in the enemy’s home and all she had to show for it was a wedding ring. Married to a monster.
She had searched every hall she could reasonably claim that she’d gotten lost in while looking her room, or the bathroom, or the kitchen, or whatever else she could think of. After three days, that excuse was losing merit - she should be more familiar with this place by now. Her heart was racing as she tiptoed, barefoot, down another empty hall of closed doors, quietly trying each doorknob. Locked. Locked. Locked. Leaning her ear against the doors, she couldn’t hear anything or anyone inside.
She tried the next. Another locked door. She was starting to lose heart; this hall was yet again a dead end. Would she ever find where they were keeping him? She twisted the next knob – locked. She sighed, glancing at the next door, when something caught her eye. Light. Two doors down at the corner of the corridor, streaming into the hall from…an open door? She flattened herself against the door in front of her, quieting her breath and listening for any sound of someone in the open room. After several minutes frozen there, she tiptoed closer, stopping every few steps to listen again. As she approached, she noticed a red chair against the opposite wall. It sat empty, facing the open door. Flattened against the wall at the edge of the door she paused one last time, before slowly creeping around to peer in.
The apartment before her was small. There was a sink and counters against one wall, a single bed, a chair, and a metal rack of clothes – mostly flannel button down shirts. No people. She ducked inside to get a better look. The apartment was well stocked. A toaster oven, a tv, lamps, a bookcase full of books, and she noticed a few potted plants. The furniture was well used, but slightly dusty. There was no evidence of anything personal in this room, nothing bought or collected like the other rooms she’d snuck into. No evidence anyone had been here recently. This room was waiting for an inhabitant, she realized. She was about to turn and leave when she heard footsteps coming around the corner. Low voices, male, were growing closer.
Her heart racing, she quickly surveyed the room again, this time searching for the best hiding spot. Under the bed wasn’t an option, the mattress was laid on stacks of wood crates. There were not enough clothes on the rack to hide behind. The cabinets on the wall were too small for her to fold into. The footsteps were getting closer, she only had one option.
She ducked behind the solid door just as she heard a voice greet the approaching steps. “Dwighty boy” she heard, and dread filled her. That was Negan’s voice. He instructed someone to leave so he could speak with Dwight, and she heard rustling of steps outside the door. She squeezed in close and peeked through the crack of the open hinged door. Her heart stopped.
There he was. Daryl. Three days, not even a hint or whisper of him, and now here he was, less than four feet away from her.
---
She’d hoped when Negan had agreed on her first night to let her try out for the Saviors that she’d be able to ask someone about Daryl. Or that she’d be able to talk to any of them at all, learn anything about the place. She’d had no such luck.
She awoke on her second day in the Sanctuary hopeful and eager to start exploring. She dressed in the most practical clothes she could find in her wardrobe, and even asked the guard at the wives’ door for some boots. He’d obtained them for her, just in time to dawn them before… sitting. And waiting. And waiting. She asked him if she’d been sent any instructions on where to go or who to meet with about training or a job. He told her that her orders would come. So, she’d continued to wait.
The wives had pulled her into different activities in the meantime. Scrabble was a favorite of Frankie’s, and they introduced her to their “spa day” ritual, which she gathered was every day. Homemade face masks, manicures, makeup before dinner. It seemed expected of them to be beautiful, and at least it was a way to pass the time. Her impatience grew, however, with every hour that passed. Each wife often left the dorm to walk around the compound, getting some movement and some air, or smoke a cigarette. They seemed to have unquestioned access to wherever they needed to go. She took advantage of that when it was obvious that she wouldn’t be missed. She’d come up empty handed on those brief searches, and each time she returned, she’d asked the guard if her orders had come. He’d just shook his head.
By the time the instructions came for her to join Negan for dinner a second night, she was fuming.
She stomped into his apartment with as much attitude as her high heels would allow, her arms crossed, demanding to know why she had been cooped up in that room all day when he’d agreed to let her be part of a Savior team.
Negan’s answering smile didn’t meet his eyes, and it made her uneasy.
“Good evening to you, too,” he drawled, holding out her chair at the table for her. “Would you like to eat before you continue to rip me a new asshole, or should we do this on empty stomachs?”
She huffed as she sat and began piling her plate with the potpie in front of her.
“We’ve only been married for a day and you’re already angry with me?” Negan teased her.
She willed herself calm and forced an apologetic smile on her face. She needed to stay on his good side, throwing a fit this early might raise questions or make him change his mind about her access. She needed Negan to trust her.
“I’m sorry,” she began, “I have always had a quick temper. I told you, I’m not great at sitting around. I got impatient. I apologize.”
Again, his answering smile didn’t meet his eyes, but he seemed satisfied with her apology.
“I’d like to play a game to start our evening,” he said after a quiet few minutes of eating. “To get to know one another a little better. We are married now, after all.”
“What game?” she asked around a mouthful.
“A drinking game,” he replied, standing and walking to his bar cart in the corner. When he returned, he brought two shot glasses and a decanter of an amber colored liquid. “I’ll ask you a question, and if you answer - honestly - you get to ask me a question in return. If you don’t answer, or if I think your answer is unsatisfactory, you take a shot and I get to ask another question.”
“I see. And do the same rules apply to you?”
“Sure,” he replied, mischief dancing in his eyes. “I take the rules of games very seriously.”
This made her nervous. She had no way of knowing what he would ask. She could always skip the question if she didn't like it, but too many questions skipped would certainly raise suspicions. She steeled herself as she took her last few bites of food, preparing for the worst.
When she raised her head, she found Negan watching her. She nodded and plastered a smile to her face.
“Sounds sexy. Let’s play.”
He grinned as he poured two shot glasses of the drink and slid one across the table to her.
“My first question,” he said, “is how long were you part of Rick’s group?”
She silently released a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. She felt a little relief at how simple the question was. She recounted the basic story of coming upon Rick's group in a small church in Georgia several weeks before they found Alexandria, and traveling with them to Virginia, looking for the family of one of their guys.
“How did you all find Alexandria?” Negan asked as her short story came to an end.
“I think it’s my turn for a question,” she teased him, “unless you want to skip that do a shot?”
He grinned in response and gestured for her to ask her question.
This was more pressure than answering. It was a good opportunity to get information, maybe even find out where Daryl is, if she could ask casually enough... She would have to be very careful how she approached it. She decided to start slowly, not too eager to get telling information from him.
“How many communities do you have working for you?” She asked, after some contemplation. Maybe a train of questions that make her seem curious about his operation would seem less suspicious when she got to Daryl.
“A lot,” he answered proudly, “I won't waste time counting them all. It’s a lot though. It has to be, to feed all our people.” A lot. There were a lot of other communities nearby. Potential allies. She filed that information away for later.
“How did your group find Alexandria?” He asked again, now that it was his turn.
“They found us. Their scouts had been watching us on the road. All but starved to death, desperate, and nearly feral. They took us in and gave us jobs. Have you always been the leader of the Saviors?”
Negan’s dark eyes stared at his glass for a long minute. She wasn’t sure he was going to answer, when he finally said, “No, but the guy before me was weak, he didn’t know what he was doing. It’s been me for long enough, and we’re all better for it. You’ve seen what we’ve become. I got us here.”
There was a pause as she took in what he said. He wasn’t wrong. She didn't really want to be here, but she had to admit that it worked. People were safe and fed, and there was a sense of order. Had she found this before Rick’s group, she wouldn’t have hesitated to become part of it.
“If you only got there a month ago, how did Rick end up in charge?” Negan asked.
“Who said Rick was in charge?” she countered.
Negan gave her a pointed look.
“It wasn’t on purpose, necessarily. There was an attack from some crazy outside group – not your guys. A bunch of walkers got past the walls; lost a lot of people - including the town’s leader. Rick is just the sort of guy that others follow, so the natural option was for him to step into the role.”
She hesitated a moment. “What’s your plan for them?” she asked, risking the question. Hoping it felt like an organic follow up. Negan drained his shotglass, not giving anything away. Damn. “What’s your plan for Daryl?” she was risking even more, now, but she wasn’t sure she’d have an opening again.
“I lost a lot of good fighters,” he answered. “I need more, and I like his spirit. He’ll make a great Savior once I wear him down.” She buried the dread that rose in her at his words and willed her heart to stop pounding.
Now his turn, Negan asked her “Who is Rick’s secondhand man?”
Realization hit her like a slap to the face. She should have guessed sooner his purpose for playing this game. She’d been blind, too focused on her own agenda to bother considering his. She’d have to be more careful about her answers now. If she revealed too much about Rick or Alexandria, she could put her friends in even more danger.
“All these questions about Rick…” she said, with a raised eyebrow and a hint of seduction in her voice, “I’m starting to feel a little jealous…” She took her glass and threw the shot to the back of her throat. She coughed a little as she swallowed. Whiskey had always done that to her.
Negan searched her face before grinning and continuing, “I would hate to have my new wife feeling neglected this soon. Tell me, what did you do before the world fell?”
“That's more like it,” she said with a slight curl of her lip. “Although a little difficult to answer. I worked a lot of jobs; I was putting myself through grad school. Took as many part-time jobs as I could. I had two semesters left, and was already working on my thesis when the outbreak began.”
“Psychology,” she added, as she saw him start to speak again. He confirmed that was his next question with a slight nod of his head. “Same question to you,” she asked, settling back in her chair to keep the room from spinning. She hadn’t done a shot in ages, and her time on the road left her smaller than she ever was during her college partying era. Another shot or two and she wasn’t sure she could trust herself to answer anymore questions.
“I worked with kids,” Negan responded. “Gym teacher and coach.”
She didn’t try to hide a look of surprise, which made Negan chuckle. “I get that a lot when I answer that question.” She would have to work through that information later, figure out what that said about him as a person. The types of people who chose teaching positions… well, it begged the question what had happened to form him into... this? She didn’t have time to flesh that thought out as Negan launched into his next inquiry.
“You studied psychology, and you spent some decent time with him… if you were me, what would your next move against Rick be?”
Shit. She walked right into that one. How was she so off her game tonight?
She searched his face for a minute, took the decanter of whiskey and filled her glass. She met his glare as she gulped the shot down, stifling her cough this time. As she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, she said, “I left their group to join you, but I don’t hate them. I’ll follow orders out there, but you can’t expect me to plot against them in here.”
Negan chewed his lip as he studied her, narrowing his eyes. She waited for his next question or her dismissal. She hoped for the latter.
“If you were me, what would your next move against Rick be?” he asked again, a malicious tone encroaching his voice.
She filled her glass again, but Negan’s hand appeared on its rim, pressing it to the table as she tried to lift it. “I’d like you to answer this one.” He said, threat in his voice despite the polite smile he wore.
As she made to protest, he cut her off. “You see, you asked to be more than just my wife - which stung a little, I won’t lie. But I am a generous husband, I like my wives to be happy. They always did say, ‘happy wife, happy life.’ I’m not one to argue with an age-old adage, but in order to do that for you, to make you happy… give you a job, if that’s really what you want… I gotta know what value you bring. I gotta know if you can do more than just take orders - I have enough obedient dogs out there. You’ve seen the way they bow to me. I don’t need another dog. What I need… is a wolf. A wolf, or a wife. The choice is yours.”
She stared at him, working to keep the rage she felt from burning through her glare. Bastard.
“I’ll give you until dinner tomorrow. Come back with something good, and I do mean something impressive, or settle in as a stay home wife, dear. You asked what I’ll do with Daryl – I guess you get to make that decision. I’d like him to become one of us, but what I need is information, and if you don’t give it, then I’ll get it from him however I have to."
"You’re dismissed.”
---
She’d played that conversation over in her head too many times to count since returning to her room last night. She worked through all her options, even options that weren’t options. How could she live with herself if she gave him all her friends’ weaknesses? How could she live with herself if she didn’t?
Seeing Daryl now, slumped in that red chair, staring into the room she hid in - her heart broke. He was filthy, his hair a level of greasy that was bad even for Daryl. His eyes were cloudy, dark bags hanging under them like he hadn’t slept in days. She shuddered to think what could put him in such a state - her strong, tough Daryl. She knew he wasn’t breaking, but she couldn’t tell how much he had left in him. He was so ragged, so run down.
Her decision was made. She wouldn’t be the cause of more pain for him. She could never forgive herself for that. For him, she could turn into whatever she needed to be. For him, she could be a wolf.
They’d see just how much of a wolf she was.
More Posts from Itsscatballou and Others
Y/N: Relationships should be 50/50.
Carol: I’m glad things are good with you two.
Y/N: Mhm. Daryl cooks us dinner while I sit on a stump and look pretty.
Carol, glancing over where Daryl is prepping a rabbit: Really?
Daryl, continuing with his task: Ain’t complainin’. You tried to eat ‘er cookin’?
Y/N: And I’m pretty.
Daryl, nodding: An’ she’s pretty.
This was heartbreaking 💔
He’s so tender. I just want them to hold each other!
Look for the Light - 5
Masterlist
Summary: Four years ago, Joel saved you from certain death. In return, you followed him faithfully. Always ready to do and give him whatever he asked, despite the hurt it inflicted on you, body and soul. Agreeing to go with him to deliver Ellie to the Fireflies… this would be the last time you’d follow him… After this, your debt would be paid.
Relationships: Reader x Joel Miller, Joel Miller & Ellie, Reader & Ellie
Warnings: Like AO3, I choose to give none. Read at your own risk. 18+ (So excited to share this with you. So much to come folks! 🙊😍)
Series Masterlist - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
You watched Joel from your seat beside the fire. The stone wall at your back does little to keep back the biting cold. You knew you must be close to where Tommy's last known location was and your mind started to wander as to what the plan was once you found him. Joel was so certain that his brother would lead them to the fireflies and yet believed that unlikely. The man had left them for a reason.
"You two ever going to speak again?" Ellie piped up, pulling your attention away from Joel.
"Ellie." You warned but the teenager scoffed.
"You two have barely spoken a word to each other since..." She trailed off, knowing the subject was still raw for you "You can't keep going on like this."
"I have his back when he needs it and he has mine... we don't need to speak to each other to achieve that."
"He's hurting too." Ellie pushed and you rolled your eyes at her "He is."
"Drop it, Ellie." You grumbled "Get some sleep. Early start ahead."
The teenager didn't push and you were glad of that. The two of you pulled out your blankets and settled down for the night, knowing Joel wouldn't allow either one of you to take the watch. Your eyes drifted to the man whose eyes scanned the darkened landscape, heart aching a little at the thought that he felt even a small semblance of pain to what had happened.
Little did you know, Joel was heartbroken. That day haunted his dreams and robbed him of his ability to sleep. Your tear-filled eyes and bloody hands were permanently seared into his memory, forever torturing him.
Joel fought to keep his tears at bay as he stripped away your soiled jeans. There was so much blood. He feared for your life if you lost much more. He knew that miscarriages could be dangerous when heavy bleeding was involved and this... this he felt fit those symptoms. Your skin was pale and your eyes looked sunken. Like you'd not slept in days and he supposed that to an extent, you probably hadn't.
"Is she losing the baby?" Ellie asked, her eyes wide as she watched the man throw the ruined garment away.
"Fetch me some water." He asked, knowing that the taps still worked in the abandoned motel.
"Joel-"
Just do as I ask Ellie." He snapped, voice wobbling a little as he looked at the teenager with an expression she found hard to read.
She didn't argue then. Rummaging through your pack, she grabbed one of the tins and ran to the bathroom, filling the vestibule with water before grabbing an old towel hanging beside the sink.
"Here." She said when she'd made her way back, handing the water and towel to Joel before sitting down on the bed beside you "You're okay." She said softly as she stroked the hair out of your face "Joel's gonna clean you up and then we'll move you to my bed so you can get some sleep."
"Ellie-" You choked but the girl just hushed you, cradling your head in her arms and pulling it to her chest.
Joel watched out of the corner of his eye whilst he worked to clean away the blood that painted your thighs. He was unable to stop his hands from shaking as he worked. His heart was breaking. Despite how he'd reacted when you'd told him the news, he had since come around to the idea that he was to have a baby with you.
He had started to picture what they would look like. He'd imagined another daughter. His curly brown hair and your eyes. He'd started to picture you, round with his child and how you'd glow. It was a picture that now had burned away. Disappearing in a puff of smoke. He knew you were never going to be the same after this.
And neither was he.
When he was done cleaning you up, he lifted you into his arms and carried you into the room Ellie had slept in that night. He was glad you'd fallen asleep or you would have seen the bodies of Henry and Sam still laying there.
Once you were settled in the bed, he went to work burying the boys. Needing some time away from the devastation inside. Ellie had gone in search of some clothes that might fit you. Your jean were beyond saving. He knew that eventually, he'd need to speak to you about what had happened but he would wait until you were ready.
However long that was.
"Here." Said Joel as he handed you a mug, coffee steaming within.
You nodded your thanks then returned to starting at the landscape beyond, bringing the mug to your lips so you could blow on its contents. Joel lingered a moment, looking at you longingly, praying that you would spare him at least one glance but you didn't. You just sipped your twenty-year-old coffee and paid him no heed.
You had barely spoken to him at all since leaving the motel two weeks ago. He didn't push you to speak to him. Your interactions with Ellie had remained the same but with him, they had ceased completely. He was in agony. The longer you froze him out, the more his heart cracked. He was sure that if this went on much longer it would shatter completely and he would surely bleed out.
You noticed him walk away from the corner of your eye and you breathed a sigh of relief at his retreat. You weren't sure what he wanted from you. He got what he wanted. The baby was gone. Did he expect you to want to talk about it? Join him in his relief? All you wanted to do now was achieve your mission so you could be rid of him. The reminder of what you lost.
"You gonna be pissed at him forever?" Ellie asked as she plonked herself next to you.
"Maybe." You replied curtly, eyes remaining fixed ahead.
"It's not his fault you know." She stated and this grabbed your attention "You losing the baby isn't his fault."
"That's not-"
"You can't blame him for what happened." Ellie pushed and you sighed "You'll need to talk to him eventually."
"I know." You grumbled, scrapping a hand over your face before sipping at the coffee Joel had made you "I will. I just... I need some time."
"Understandable." Ellie replied, giving you a warm smile "Just don't leave it too long."
It was later that night when Ellie had fallen asleep that you had decided to break your silence. Joel was perched on a fallen tree trunk, gun in hand as he scanned the woodland that surrounded you. You sat yourself down at the other end, not wanting to be too close to him, and then you spoke.
"I can take the watch tonight." You piped up, taking Joel by surprise "You could do with some sleep."
"It's fine, you go ahead." Joel replied, shaking his head at you "Don't sleep much these days anyway."
"Joel, you can't keep going on like this." You argued and this grabbed his attention "You have to let us help you."
"You know, that's might rich of you to say." Joel grumbled, turning his body to face you "Seein' as you don't seem to want to speak to me anymore."
"Joel-"
"I know you're hurtin' and I understand but-"
"Understand?" You spat, eyes growing wide in disbelief "How could you possibly understand this?"
"I lost a child once before... remember?" He said, his voice lowered in an attempt to keep this conversation out of Ellie's ears "I understand how much you're hurtin' but you have to let me in."
"You didn't even want it." You growled, eyes cold as you stared back at him "I bet you're relieved!"
"I'm not." He growled, his face hardening at your accusation "But we both know that it was probably for the best." He continued "What sort of life could we have offered them?"
"I would have loved them." You sobbed "Nurtured them. I would have given all I had to give them a good life but that opportunity was taken away from me."
Joel stared at you with wide eyes. His heart ached to tell you that he was just as heartbroken as you. That he had hoped, after delivering Ellie to the fireflies, you and he would find somewhere to settle to raise your baby together. Instead, he watched you as you cried, hand resting on where your child had once rested and he found himself unable to say anything. You scoffed at his lack of response, cementing your belief that he was relieved you had lost the baby.
Watching you walk away, sobbing, his heart broke all over again. He had lost you once and for all.
You admired the river that carved its path through the landscape on your right. The landscape was something you'd read about in the books that had survived the apocalypse.
"Look at that river. It's crazy blue." Said Ellie as she too admired the wilderness surrounding you all "Hey, Joel... what if this is the River of Death?"
This made you a Joel pause. The words of that couple echoed in your brain as you share a look with the older man.
"What's past the river?" Ellie had asked and she had replied
"Death."
Horses whinnying, made you jump from your skin and you grabbed your gun as Joel pushed Ellie back.
"Get behind me." Joel ordered, studying their mounted foes and coming to the conclusion that fighting them wasn't an option "We ain't lookin' for any trouble. We're just passin' through."
"Drop the guns." One of them ordered and both complied, raising your hands above your head once you had "You... take five steps back."
"How 'bout we just talk this through?" Joel said calmly, desperate to placate the situation.
"How 'bout you shut the fսck up?" The man spat and you flinched at his tone, heart thumping wildly in your chest.
"Okay, easy. You'll be okay."
"You been near Infected?" The man demanded and you scoffed.
"There's no Infected out here." You piped up and the group all looked at you.
"The hell there ain't." The man replied before whistling, a dog barking then it trotted into view "Last chance for a bullet. If you've been infected, he will smell it, and he will rip you up.
The dog sniffed at Joel's legs before moving on to you. The animal grunted when it was satisfied that neither of you was infected.
"Like I said... we'll just move on." Joel said as he looked from the dog to the man that owned it.
"Now her." He said, motioning at Ellie and Joel felt his heart start to race. Low growling echoed in his ears and yet he found himself glued to the spot. Unable to do anything but wait for what came next.
"Hi. Hi." She giggled, the dog licking her face and Joel turned to see the girl grinning at him.
The man whistled, pulling the dog back to his side and Joel felt his heart slow again. His eyes returned to the leader of the group.
"You just bought yourself 10 more seconds. What are you doin' out here?"
"I'm just lookin' for my brother. That's all, nothin' more." Joel replied, his expression almost pleading.
"Hо! What's your name?" Asked a woman, pulling down the fabric that covered her face.
"Joel."
"Get them on some horses."
"But-"
"Just do it." She ordered "They're coming with us."
You mounted the horse given to you, Ellie joining you on yours as Joel gets on his own. The three of you then followed the group for a short while. Not a word was shared between anyone until you reached a set of tall wooden gates, flanked on either side by a wall just as high.
The gates opened. Revealing a bustling town that looked like it had never been touched by the tragedy that had torn the world to shreds. It reminded you of where you'd grown up. Just on the border of Canada. The wooden buildings felt familiar to you and you felt safe for the first time in years. Children laughed around you. People sang Christmas carols as they gathered around a tree that stood proudly in the square.
"TOMMY!" Joel's shouting pulled your attention away from the town and you watched the man leap from his horse and sprint towards a man you recognised as Tommy.
He didn't appear to have aged since you'd seen him last, unlike Joel.
"What the fսck you doin' here?" He asked, pulling back from his embrace with his brother to look at him better.
"I came here to save you," Joel replied, the two brothers sharing a look before he pulled him into a hug again.
The sight stirred something you'd thought long dead.
Affection.
The three of you were then led to a canteen-like space where you were served a piping hot meal and the cleanest water you'd tasted in years. Then, after Joel scorned Ellie for her manners and you'd all learned that Tommy was now married to the woman who'd brought you to town. A woman who went by the name of Maria. She then proceeded to give you a tour of the town before Maria took Ellie to the house they'd allocated them and you and Joel went to the town bar to catch up.
You weren't sure why Tommy had insisted you come. You weren't family. You suspected he hoped it would soothe over the grilling he knew he was inevitably going to receive from Joel. You knew differently.
"Been a long time." Chuckled as he stroked the polished wooden bar.
"I've never been in a bar." You teased, surprised at how relaxed you now found yourself.
"Shut up." The brothers replied in unison, making you smirk at them.
"Doesn't seem like you aged much." Joel said as he returned his attention to his brother, watching as he poured you both a glass of amber liquid.
"You, on the other hand." Tommy said, winking at you before pushing the glasses towards you and Joel "Thanks for still givin' a shit about me." He toasted, smiling at Joel before sipping his drink.
Joel's mouth formed a pouty 'O' as he looked from the glass to his brother. A silent conversation passed between the two men.
"Workin' on raisin' some hogs, too. Once we get bacon, I mean, what's even left?"
"Pshoo." Joel laughed "Christmas trees and bacon? Pretty decent setup." Joel said as he stood and walked over to the fireplace across from the bar. Studying the pictures sat on the mantle.
"So, how's Tess?" Tommy asked as his gaze flitted between you and Joel.
"She's fine. All right." Joel replied, taking you by surprise so you opted to keep your mouth shut. The man knew what he was doing.
"Good then. And the kid?" Pushed and Joel once again answered before you had a chance to open your mouth.
"Oh, yeah. She’s the daughter of some Firefly muckety-muck... Try'na find her family somewhere out here. I was headin' in this direction, so..."
"Really? Goodness of your heart?" Tommy scoffed, his gaze drifting to you.
"There's a payment." You replied, watching as his eyes squinted at you. "So you know where they might be? These Fireflies?" You asked, taking a sip of your drink.
"Well, they got a base down at the University of Eastern Colorado. It's, uh, a week's ride south. But it is severely fսckеd up between here and there. Infected... raiders." Tommy stated, his gaze returning to his brother "It’s not exactly an easy trip."
"It’ll be easy for us, seeing as how you can headshot Infected from half a mile away, which is a bunch of bullshit, by the way." You chuckled at Joel's statement, remembering how good a shot Tommy had been back in the day.
"Yeah, I can’t go."
"Oh, come on." You chuckled, sure that Tommy was having you both on. "I made it across the country."
"The two of us can make it from here to Colorado." Joel pushed, brows pulled together as he studied his brother's boy language closely. "What, ’cause your wife won’t let you?"
"They’re good people." Tommy argued "They didn’t have to take me in, but they did. And all they ask is that I follow their rules."
"I’m your brother." Joel growled, unable to believe what he was hearing.
"Yeah, I’m aware." Tommy scoffed "They’re very protective of this place, and for good fuckin’ reason." The younger man continued, sipping his drink again "I mean, folks find out we’re up here…"
"No, we heard." Joel interrupted and Tommy sighed.
"Wrong people might show up."
"So is that what we are? Are we the wrong people?" He asked, motioning between you and him.
"Joel…"
"Those things I did, Tommy, those things that you judge me for, I did those things to keep us alive." Joel spat, edging closer to his sibling.
"We did those things." Tommy snarled "And they weren’t 'things.' We murdered people... And I don’t judge you for it." Tommy paused, letting out a sigh as he looked between you and Joel "We survived the only way we knew how. But there were other ways..." He trailed off "We just weren’t any good at ’em."
"If you knew the shit that we've been through... Tommy, tryin’ to find you these last few months…"
"I’m gonna be a father."
This news hit you like a freight train.
You saw Joel glance at you. Felt his eyes on you as you started down into your drink. Desperately trying to keep yourself together.
"Maria’s a few months along now." Tommy continued, smiling as he played with the glass in his hands "So I just gotta be more careful..." He paused, glancing at you and Joel "To be honest, I’m scared to death. But I don’t know. Uh… I feel like I’d be a good dad."
A pregnant pause hung over you all. Joel looked at you before returning his attention to his drink. Downing the last of it before speaking.
"Guess we’ll find out." He said as he poured himself a drink.
“I guess we’ll find out?" Tommy spat, angry at his brother's response "That’s all you got?"
"What else am I supposed to say?" The older man asked, looking at his brother who was now squared up to him.
"Just because life stopped for you… doesn’t mean it has to stop for me." Tommy snarled and you swear you could hear Joel's heart shatter.
With tearful eyes, he glanced at you before downing his drink and grabbing his coat.
"We’ll grab some supplies and be outta your hair in the mornin’."
You watched Joel leave. Tommy called after him before slamming his hand on the counter of the bar.
"We lost a baby." You said numbly, grabbing Tommy's attention.
"What?"
"Joel and I... We found out three months ago that I was pregnant." You replied, eyes locking with the man's as you continued "We lost it after escaping from Kansas City."
"Shit I'm-"
"I'm happy for you Tommy." You continued "But don't expect us to be jumping for joy."
You finished your drink and then grabbed your coat, wanting to be out of this place as soon as possible.
"I'm sorry you lost your baby." Tommy piped up, stopping you in your tracks "But life goes on. You can't live your life bitter because other people have what it is you want... It'll poison you."
You didn't reply. You simply left, your tears streaming by the time you stepped outside.
You managed to find the house Maria and Tommy had told you about. You'd decided to take a walk on your own for a few hours and before you'd realised, the sun had set and the town was now blanketed in the soft yellow light. Stepping inside you could hear talking coming from upstairs.
"I’m not her, you know?" Ellie said as you came to a stop outside her room "Maria told me about Sarah and…"
"Don’t." Joel warned, his voice low "Don’t say another word."
"I-I’m sorry about your daughter, Joel." Ellie pushed on, ignoring the man's warning "But I have lost people, too."
"You have no idea what loss is." Joel growled, his tone making you shiver.
"Everybody I have cared for has either died or left me." Ellie spat "Everybody, fucking except for you!" She yelled "So don’t tell me that I’d be safer with somebody else because the truth is I would just be more scared."
"You’re right." Joel piped up after a short pause "You’re not my daughter and I sure as hell ain’t your dad..." He paused a moment, and you wondered where he was going with this. Your question was soon answered.
"Now, come dawn… we’re goin’ our separate ways." You felt your blood boil.
You didn't even flinch when he opened the door to see you standing on the other side. The two of you then just glared at each other before you stormed off, leaving a frustrated Joel in your wake.
The words his brother had spoken to him less than an hour earlier after he'd pleaded for the man to take Ellie still swirled around in his head.
"I know you lost another child Joel... and for that Brother I am sorry but you can't keep shutting her out. I know you're grieving... Don't bottle it up."
Making his way downstairs, he placed himself down on the couch and threw his head into his hands. Memories of Sarah flashed in his mind. Of him decorating the tree with her. Making Christmas cookies to hand from its branches. Not that many made it onto the tree.
His mind then drifted to you. How he could have shared that with you one day. How he still wanted to. He knew he had to make things right with you.
He just wasn't sure how.
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The Shower
a/n - I am nearing the end of season 6 in my rewatch, and this idea has been stuck in my head since ep. 12 in season 5. I am hyper-fixated on Daryl right now, and I am hoping writing these will get him out of my system!
Daryl x reader (female anatomy described)
Summary: Daryl needs a shower, and you encourage him to take one... with you.
Warnings: smut, 18+ only, m x f, p in v, fingering, stroking, unprotected sex, mentions of loss, killing, hunting
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Daryl had not said much to you, or anyone really, since you joined the group. They took you in a few weeks back, when you stumbled across an old church they were hiding in. You'd learn to read them all pretty quickly (you were good at that), trying to figure out how to fit in this tight-knit group. It was clear they were all hurting. They’d lost a safe place recently, you’d been told. They’d lost people when it fell and they got separated, and since joining them, you’d seen them lose more. Sasha had lost her brother and her boyfriend; Abraham had lost a mission (you still needed to figure out what that was about). You were there when Maggie learned she’d lost her sister. That one seemed to hit hard for everyone in the group, especially for Daryl, you’d noticed.
You didn’t mind that Daryl didn't talk much, it was nice in the moments you found yourself alone with him (which seemed to happen more than not). It was not expected that you'd talk about your past, nor did you expect him to talk about his. You both liked it that way. It seemed to gravitate you both to each other – this silent understanding that you’d both lost people, and keeping to yourself was protection. So, you didn’t fully understand who Beth was to Daryl, but you did understand that he was hurting. For some reason, you could not shake the desperate urge to help him - to fix the hurt - or at the very least distract him from it. And now, seemingly safe in this miraculous compound, safe behind the big walls of what they called Alexandria, he seemed more on edge than anyone. Even Rick - which was saying something. You needed to help him. Watching Daryl sulking in a corner on the front porch while everyone dispersed to explore and get to know our new home, you overheard a conversation that gave you an idea.
“Have you taken a shower yet?” you heard Carol ask him.
“Mmhmm,” you heard him respond, obviously a lie. You could write “wash me” in the dirt and filth accumulated on his skin.
“Take a shower. I’m gonna wash that vest. We need to keep up appearances, even you,” Carol firmly suggested to him as she walked away to meet neighbors and begin her assigned job in the community. You heard Daryl mumble a response; you assumed he declined the shower when you heard Carol retort that she would hose him down in his sleep.
The house was empty now, as you made your way to the porch. This was a bold plan, you knew that. Your heart was pounding in your chest just thinking it through, but you had little doubt it would work. You’d had weeks on the road with this crew, and as time marched, you’d found yourself with Daryl more and more, both of you finding excuses to be alone. Excuses like scouting ahead together, or hunting together when you were all desperate for a meal. You’d become almost friends, and you were confident you could read him well enough to know how he’d respond to this. You hoped.
“Hey,” you drawled as you approached the archer on the porch, cleaning his crossbow. He looked up at you in a silent greeting. “Can I show you something?” you asked, tilting your head toward the door to indicate it was inside. You saw Carol look back at both of you as he put down his weapon and followed you inside.
You lead him upstairs, and through what was presumably the primary bedroom of the house, into the large attached bathroom. “Ya need ta show me somethin’ in the bathroom?” he asked suspiciously as you took his hand and lead him further in.
“You trust me, right?” you asked him, looking in his eyes, not letting go of his hand. He held your stare for a moment before responding, “yeh, I guess.” Your eyes traveled to his lips and lingered there for a moment, and you could feel tension building in the room. You moved in slowly, meeting his eyes again as you got closer, and lightly kissed him on the lips. He tensed. You pulled back just a hair, searching his eyes for what he could be thinking, your breath mingling with his, and went in for a second kiss. This time, he returned the kiss. Both of you gentle at first, and then both seeming to get hungrier for it. You pushed your tongue against his lips and he opened, letting you in. He pushed your tongue back with his and made his way into your mouth, his hands moving to your waist and pulling you in close as he devoured you.
Yes. This was going to work.
You smiled a bit against his mouth, and teasingly pulled away from the kiss, backing up toward the large walk-in shower. You opened the glass door, and leaned in to turn the water on. Returning to Daryl, you ran your hands up his chest from his abdomen, slipping your hands under the shoulders of his vest and removing as it as your mouth found his again. Your hands moved to his shirt, slowly unbuttoning each one from the top. He pulled back from the kiss to look at you, searching your face for a clue as to what you were thinking. A sultry smile made its way to the corner of your mouth as you grabbed your shirt at the hem, and took your shirt and bra off in one sweeping motion. He stared at your breasts for a moment, taking in the way they heaved as you breathed in and out quickly, the humidity from the steam and the passion of the moment quickening your breath.
That was all he needed – he quickly removed his shirt, shoes, and pants while you did the same, and then he nearly ran to close the distance between you and cover your mouth with his again. You could feel his length pushing against your stomach as your kisses grew sloppy. With one of his hands wrapped around your waist, and one tangling his fingers through your hair, you could already feel the heat growing in your core, wetting you. You smiled against his mouth again, and moved away from him. “Hang on a sec,” you said, a bit out of breath, as you bent over and collected the discarded clothes on the floor. You moved toward the door, tossed the clothes out, and shut and locked the bathroom door behind you. As you turned, you saw a discouraged look leaving Daryl’s face, and changing his expression to a ravenous one.
You grabbed his hand again as you moved past him into the shower, and standing under the steaming stream of hot water, pulled him against you again. You both quickly resumed your hungry kisses, and as the water washed some of the dirt away from Daryl’s face and neck, you followed the clean path with your mouth. Moving to his chin, then his neck, and slowly to nibble his ear. He groaned, and it was all you could do to keep from jumping on his hard member right then, but you wanted to make this last. You kept nibbling as you reached your hand down and found his shaft, and gently began pulling and stroking it. He responded by pushing you toward the wall and finding your lips with his again. You bit his bottom lip slightly and you stroked longer, and watched as his eyes rolled back in his head slightly. He moved his kisses down your neck and lingered there as he lifted your leg and placed it around his hip.
He held your leg there with one hand, gripping and kneading your thigh and his other hand slowly swept down your side to the front of your stomach, and further. He slowly cupped his hand when he reached your opening, and began sliding his fingers up and down, and in circular motions within your folds. He grunted deeply as he felt the slick that had built for him there. Slowly, he inserted a finger and began rubbing your clit in and out of your opening. You moaned, and then again, as he inserted a second finger, still sucking and kissing your neck. One of your hands slightly clawing his back in response, the other combing through the hair at the base of his neck, you pulled his hair slightly until his head titled backwards and you could feel the water of the shower soaking through his hair. He groaned as you pulled his hair again, and you could no longer stand it. You needed him inside you. Now.
You pulled his hair with one hand as your other hand pushed him backwards, until his legs touched the built-in, tiled bench at the other end of the shower, and he sat. With the warm water streaming down your back, you placed your knees on either side of his thighs, and looked down. His member at its full length now, you gulped at the size of him. You looked into his eyes, and grinned wickedly. He raised an eyebrow in question at you, as you used your hand to guide his tip to your entrance, and slowly sank down onto his cock. He filled you completely, and you had to take your time moving further down as you adjusted to his length. When you had him sheathed to the hilt, you met his eyes with yours again, tangling your fingers into his hair, and began rocking your hips back and forth. You watched as his eyes rolled back in his head again, as you rocked deeper. Your eyes never leaving his, you picked up the pace and felt your orgasm building already. You closed your eyes, throwing your head back and groaning as you ground your hips more and more. You felt his head lean forward and his mouth find the top of your breast. He slowly made his way down your breast with his lips until he found your nipple, and began sucking hard. Your moan was deep and loud in response. He nipped a bit with his teeth, and you felt the build of your orgasm reaching its peak. He sucked again, and thrust upwards with his hips, hitting a spot inside you that you weren’t expecting, and you felt your release shatter you. You gasped and cried out as you came, your arms shaking as your hand stroked his hair.
You felt him grin against your breast as he slowly stood, raising his mouth to yours again, and turning you until your back was pressed against the glass shower wall. He held your thighs around his waist as he began pumping into you, his movements becoming harder and faster, frantic as he chased his own orgasm. He leaned his head against your neck, and you felt his hot breath and he gasped and moaned. You clawed your fingers down his back as he continued grinding into you, making you see stars as the length of him hit every wall inside you. You could hear the wet sound of him thrusting in and out of you, in and out, slamming into you and making the glass wall shake. You felt his movements stutter a bit, and felt him twitch inside you as he let out a low roar, pumping hard two more times before spilling his seed inside you. You both froze there, panting and grinning, both coming down from your orgasms.
When he finally set you back down on your feet, your legs wobbled a bit as you moved to the shampoo, and offered it to him. You spent the rest of the shower cleaning yourselves and trying to get your breath back, shyly stealing glances at each other. When you were both done and drying yourselves with the soft, fluffy towels you found in a cabinet, Daryl broke the quiet.
“Wha’ was that for?” he asked you, not meeting your eyes.
“What do you mean?” you asked back.
“Ya brought me straight up here an’ started that outta nowhere. Why?”
“You mean other than because I wanted to?” you replied, “I guess because I knew you needed it. A release, I mean. You’ve been pent up and tense since...” you trailed off, not wanting to mention Beth’s name, “and it seemed like letting you blow off some steam might help.” And after a beat, you added, “and I didn’t want Carol to hose you off in your sleep.”
You heard him let out a breath like a chuckle, before adding, “I needed it, too, Daryl. I needed you.”
You met his eyes and you could read it there, a thank you. And something else behind it, was it affection?
He moved toward the door and peaked out. “Wha’ the hell? Our clothes ‘er gone.”
“Good. I was hoping Carol caught on and would grab them,” you reply back with a sinister smile.
“What ‘er we ‘spose to do now?” he asked, indignant.
“Well, you can sit in this bathroom wrapped in your towel until she comes back with clean clothes, or you can leave the towel in here with mine, and we can go into that bedroom and find some ways to pass the time,” you said with a wink, dropping your towel and sauntering past him into the bedroom.
He watched you for a moment, his eyes raking up and down your naked form, before dropping his towel and following after you.
I cackled
gif by @daryl-dixon-daydreams
Commonwealth diner Waiter: What would you like?
Y/N: A chocolate milkshake with two straws, please.
Daryl, blushing: I—
Y/N, putting both straws in her mouth: Watch how fast I can drink this!!
Daryl: …
Justified - Chapter 7
A Negan Series
Chapter 6 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 1
Warnings: smut - detailed and implied. Language. 18+ only.
A/n - Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me on this journey! There's one more little wrap up to this series coming (Daryl reunion, anyone?), but this piece feels good to finally finish. As always, feedback is welcome!
Her days bedridden passed lazily and slowly. Negan woke her with long, sensual kisses each morning before leaving her for most of the day.
She read to pass the time, sometimes reading aloud to Negan when he joined her again in the evenings. She liked making use of her vocal muscles, any way to release some of the energy that was returning to her more each day. He liked the sound of her voice, never really paying much attention to the subject of her reading. She noticed this, of course, and began sneaking in some smutty romance to see if he’d notice.
He did.
The IV and the pain of her wound still prevented much physical activity, but they found plenty of ways to work around that. The more time they spent together, the more they seemed to crave it.
In her moments alone, she found herself thinking of Daryl and did her best to push the thoughts away. Often unsuccessful, she sat in self-loathing, remembering the person she was with him. In the months they’d shared, they’d easily fallen into a rhythm of teamwork. Their runs together took longer than any other runs, not only because they enjoyed the time with one another, or because they liked to take advantage of the alone time with stolen kisses (and often more than that). Neither would openly admit it to the other, but they both brought with them a list for others in the community. Items Tara would request, or something that might make Carl smile, or a snack or drink Daryl had overheard Rosita reminiscing about. Anything one of their family would enjoy having. They both loved watching the faces of their people light up when they saw their treats. Both she and Daryl had figured out the other was doing the same thing, but neither wanted to call attention to it. It was an unspoken quest they were both happy to be part of.
On the days they were working apart, sometimes with schedules so opposite they’d only see each other in passing, they had developed a secret code to signal the other for a secret rendezvous. A hideous turquoise and zebra print scarf - found in the bottom of a closet in the room they shared in the Grimes’s Alexandria home - spotted tied around a post, or tree, or car mirror, meant they’d find the other waiting for them at their claimed spot in the woods. It was a small clearing, wildflowers blooming across it in the spring, bordered on one edge by a large, downed tree that was great for sitting, but more importantly hid them from view from anyone who might be wandering from the community. They’d return home together half an hour later, smiling conspicuously, their clothes in disarray and often picking leaves and twigs off each other, before separating again to the tasks they’d been assigned. It was good. He was good, and she was good. They were happy.
The thought of returning to that now left her heart torn in two; she longed for it, for him to look at her in that trusting, happy way; and she knew without doubt that she could never have that again. When Daryl learned what she’d done, who she’d become…she imagined his face, what would simmer in his eyes when he looked at her, and she couldn’t bear it. Pushing the image deep within herself, she’d pick up another book and force herself to focus on the words.
She couldn’t deny that things had changed here in the Sanctuary. The people were mostly the same, though many of the Saviors she’d come to know would send her gifts and cards to wish her a speedy recovery, many stopping by to say hello and offer help. The place seemed brighter, somehow. Lighter. Like everyone was breathing easier. Even Negan seemed to have softened some. He was brooding less, and his jokes not so dark. It was nothing like Alexandria had been, but she couldn’t deny it felt… comfortable. Happy, even.
She almost kissed the doctor on the mouth when he informed her that her infection had cleared up and she could stop the IVs and begin light activity to strengthen her leg.
Negan turned his grin toward her as the doctor left the room. “So, would you like a walk outside or a shower?” he asked her, knowing both were on the top of her list of things to do first. She slowly stood, taking his outstretched hand and limping toward him.
It took a frustratingly long time to reach him. Finally in front of him, she lifted to her tiptoes, putting most weight on her good leg to do so, and planted her lips firmly against his. When he returned her kiss, she began unbuckling the belt of his pants. “I can think of something else I’d like first,” she mumbled against his mouth.
He pulled away to look her in the eye. “Are you sure?”
“The doctor said light activity was good for me,” she replied seductively.
He lifted her off the floor and she wrapped her legs around him and returned her lips to his.
“Not the bed,” she said against his mouth when he started moving her backwards. She’d spent too much time in that bed lately. He pivoted and instead made his way to the couch with her. He sat, her straddling his lap, and their kisses got more heated. Their tongues in a playful dance, her occasionally biting his lip in the way that drove him crazy. She felt his growing erection pressing into her core from within his jeans.
She made her way to his neck, sucking and kissing the tender spots, eliciting deep growls of pleasure from him.
She slowly moved to put her knees on the floor before him, careful not to flex her thigh too much, and finished the job of undoing his belt. She looked up at him with sultry eyes, biting her lip as she worked on his jeans, the heat in his eyes immediately making her wet between her thighs.
His jeans undone, his member sprung free of its cage, and she felt a tingle deep between her legs. The thick shaft, hard as a rock, beckoned for her to consume it. She conceded to its call, taking his tip into her mouth and flicking it with her tongue. She varied between a light suck and massaging it with her tongue, and raising her eyes, watched as he held her eye contact with every gasp she drew from him. She moved her mouth further down his length, working her tongue underneath his shaft. His head rolled back as she took him as far into her mouth as she could, coughing when he reached her gag reflex. Her hands moved to the area of shaft that remained exposed as she worked him up and down with her mouth, massaging and pumping him. Continuing with her mouth pumping and her hands massaging, she heard his moans and sharp breaths, and knew he didn’t have much further to go before he found release.
She withdrew from him, carefully and timidly standing, and met his eyes as she slowly dropped her pajama shorts to the floor. Stepping out of them, she pulled her shirt over her head and threw it haphazardly in the direction of the bed. Now bare before him, he could not help but reach out and touch her. She let him trace her shape with his hands from her hips to her breasts, where he cupped each in one hand. She moved to straddle him while he massaged her, and lowered herself until she felt his hardness pressed against her. She raised just slightly, enough to place his tip at her entrance, and she paused there. She leaned in, kissing him passionately. She began rocking her hips back and forth, feeling his slick tip rub up and down her center. She moved her mouth to his neck again, continuing the movement of her hips. She wanted him inside her, but not yet. She leaned back to look in his eyes as she continued teasing him and saw a plead in his eyes. He made to push into her, and she pushed his abdomen back down, preventing him.
“Y/n,” he moaned out, the plead moving from his eyes to his voice.
Her lips curled upward in a devious smile, she savored the power she held over him.
“Y/n,” this time a deeper growl, laced with demand.
She grinned wickedly at him, then holding his cock with her hand, moved him to her entrance and lowered herself onto him, fully sheathing him in her tight warmth. She leaned further away from him as she rolled her hips, savoring the way he filled her. He gripped her hips, steadying her with each roll. Negan began pumping up into her, finding her rhythm and matching it. They held eye contact as they rhythmically moved together. She picked up the pace and he groaned as his eyes rolled back in his head. She moved her hand between her legs, but he pushed it aside to replace it with one of his own. She felt her orgasm building as she continued to ride him, feeling him hit every wall within her, while he rubbed her clit in circles. As her moans grew louder and her eyes closed, she felt him pump up into her more vigorously. She shattered, leaning into him and crying out. When he was sure she’d ridden out her high, Negan lifted her and placing her on her back on the floor, quickly pumped back into her. He worked her fiercely, removing his cock almost completely from her and then pounding back in. Out and in, out and in, grunting with each insertion. She couldn’t stop herself from crying out in pleasure at every pump. A second orgasm was now verging on release. His pumps became more frantic, animalistic and he shoved in and out of her, her hands gripping the hair on the back of his head, and she gasped as her second release exploded through her. He followed immediately, erupting within her with a cry of his own. He stilled as he finished, pumped into her a few short times as she rode out her high, and then collapsed on the floor beside her, both panting.
“Fuck, y/n,” Negan said in a breathless voice.
The floodgates opened; they could not seem to get enough of each other after that. Not half an hour later, they were at it again in the shower. Her energy depleted quickly in her recovering state. Following the shower, she climbed back into bed, exhausted and sore. She smiled as she drifted into sleep. She awoke to Negan between her legs again, eager and demanding. After dinner, she did attempt a walk outside, but couldn’t get down more than three stairs before having Negan help her back to his room. Her leg throbbing from all the movement, the doctor gave her something strong for the pain. She slept a fitful sleep, dreaming of Daryl throughout the night.
-------
As she continued to recover, she did not return to her own room. There was no mention of it from either of them. The sex didn’t slow. They found themselves hungrily attaching to each other with every spare minute Negan could find. It did not matter where they were, and soon she was sure he’d had her in every room of the Sanctuary, and even places that weren’t rooms. Each day she got stronger and able to walk further, until finally she was limping around the border gates unsupported.
She was finishing one of those such walks, heading back toward the stairwell entrance where Negan had disappeared - giving her a suggestive nod to follow him inside - when she saw it. It was a brief flash of color in the corner of her eye, causing her to look again. Just another walker chained to the fence, she turned to walk to the door and froze. That was just another walker, but what it was wearing stopped her heart. She slowly turned to look again, hoping she imagined it. She hadn’t.
Draped around the walker’s decaying neck was the familiar black, white, and turquoise scarf.
She scanned the perimeter, panic rising in her. He couldn’t be here; it would be so stupid to come back here. A flash from the corner of a rundown building caught her attention, she squinted to see a figure half hidden there, rotating a small mirror to catch the sun. She moved closer to the fence, and the man stepped out from the building. Aaron. She relaxed a little, selfishly grateful it was not Daryl putting his life in danger. She shook her head at him as if to say, not now. She tapped her wrist where a watch would be, and held up three fingers, then shifted them into a circle. Thirty minutes, she willed him to understand. He nodded and disappeared completely behind the building.
Thirty minutes later, she was hobbling away from a disappointed Negan through the gates and toward the buildings across the street from the Sanctuary. He had been expecting a hot and heavy round in the stairs with her when she told him she’d seen something suspicious in the town. She suspected just a loose walker but wanted to check it out. He protested, but she’d made a solid argument for needing to get her sea legs back. She needed the practice. As she veered left, heading toward an alley two buildings away from where she’d seen Aaron, she heard light footsteps behind her. She grinned to herself as she picked up her pace and ducked around the building. She moved as quickly as she could around buildings, down alleys, seemingly lost and wandering, until she found the cracked door of the building Aaron had been hiding behind. She was met with stairs, and took them to the first landing, where she found another door cracked open. She had just stepped through it when she heard the outside door squeak open behind her.
She located Aaron in the second room on the right and as quickly as possible whispered “We are not alone. Speak carefully.”
Aaron squinted and blinked at her as he processed what she’d said. She began the conversation in a hushed voice, “What are you doing here? Are you trying to get yourself killed? Because that is what will happen if they find you sneaking around out here.”
“Are you okay?” he replied. “Some Saviors came looking for Daryl, said he’d run away. We wanted to see if you were still here, are you okay?”
“I’m fine. You shouldn’t have come here. Don’t let them see you when you leave.” She turned to leave.
“Come with me,” Aaron said. She halted and turned to face him again.
“Why would I?” she asked coldly.
“Why would you stay here? These people… Negan…,” Aaron searched for the words, “you’re better than this. Better than them. You belong with us.”
She scoffed. “I’m right where I should be.”
Aaron searched her face, and she softened it a little. She had quickly liked Aaron; he was such a genuine person. “I’m not going back with you,” she said, more gently this time.
As she turned again to leave, Aaron grabbed her by the arm. Their eyes met, and she saw fierce warning in them. “We’re going to fight, Y/N. Soon. We will not hesitate to take down anyone on his side. You should come back.”
“Aaron,” she gave her own warning, “You can’t fight him. Numbers are not on your side, and you’ve lost enough people. Don’t lose more for no reason.”
She pulled her arm from his grip and made for the door. When she got to the threshold and saw no one in the hall, she turned to Aaron one more time, with a plea in her eye.
“Give me a couple of days. To talk to him, try to convince him to negotiate with Rick. I don’t want anyone else to die.”
Aaron gave her one short nod. She left.
-------
She found Negan and Dwight talking in low voices in the courtyard when she came through the gate. She should have guessed that little weasel was the one following her, now giving a full report of what he’d heard from her meeting with Aaron. Negan gave an order and Dwight nodded and disappeared inside the building, leaving her limping toward Negan alone.
“I don’t see any walker blood on you,” Negan said, giving her a once over.
“I don’t appreciate you having me followed. Especially not by him,” she replied, jerking her chin in the direction Dwight had gone.
“I don’t like being lied to,” he replied shortly.
“What did he tell you?”
“That we’re going to war,” he replied as he moved to the door and held it open, indicating she should join him inside. She saw a couple of guys hanging around a few feet past the entrance. She stopped as she entered the building, and faced Negan as he entered behind her.
“You don’t have to go to war, Negan,” she said, sincerity flooding her voice. “You could meet with Rick, find a solution that works for all of us to keep the peace. Work out a trade deal with him. Not everything has to be a fight.”
“This does.”
“Negan,” she touched his arm, “aren’t you tired of this? Aren’t you tired of losing our people?” The term struck her as odd – our people. But they were her people, too. They had become her people. She knew the guys here, knew their families, where they’d come from and what they’d been through. She’d spent months getting to know them, and she even liked a good number of them. “He kills our guys, you kill his, is it going to go on and on forever?”
“No, I am not tired, and no it will not go on and on forever. We are going to end this, for real this time.”
“No.”
“Excuse me?”
“You can’t just make that decision; you can’t just ignore other options because you and Rick aren’t done measuring your dicks. We’ve lost too many people already.”
Negan looked at the guys standing nearby, who had not even tried to hide that they were eavesdropping. When they saw him looking at them, they immediately found themselves needed somewhere else.
“In private,” Negan looked at her, furious, “you can say whatever the hell you want to me, but you question me in front of my guys again,” he looked pointedly where the men had been standing, then moved in close to her as he said “I will shut. your. shit. down. Are we clear?”
She did not break his stare.
“I’ll take that as a yes. Now, move your ass. You have an assembly to join.”
She entered the large warehouse area and proceeded down the stairs to join the large group of Saviors and workers gathered there. She noticed the two guys who’d heard her conversation with Negan gathered with a group of other guys, talking lowly and watching her as she passed them. Telling them what she’d said to Negan, no doubt. One thing about the Saviors, she could count on them all to be busybodies and gossips.
Negan began from his place on the platform above the assembly, briefly explaining that Rick and his “merry band” were planning on coming for them, and it was time to put an end to them. She waited patiently, watching the crowd as they began whispering and grumbling amongst themselves. The mood of the room shifted - the dissatisfaction was almost tangible. Those busybodies had done fast work.
She raised her hand, willing herself not to shake, not to show the overwhelming sense of fear she felt. This is what she’d been working toward for months.
Negan saw her hand, his eyes found hers, and he could have burned holes into her with the look behind them.
“I am not currently taking questions,” he said curtly. Everyone turned to see who he was speaking to.
“I don’t have a question,” she said, her voice miraculously unshaken. “More of a statement – I think we should take a vote.”
“A vote?” he answered in surprise.
“Yes. You and Rick have been at each other for months now. He’s killed way more of our people than we have of his. We should vote if we want to continue fighting him.”
“We don’t vote here,” Negan said, at a near laugh. “In case you are confused, this has never been, and never will be a democracy. If I say you are going to fight, you are going to fight.”
“Why are we even doing this? They don’t have a food source, they don’t have any weapons, we already took those. They aren’t really giving us anything. This is about nothing but you and your pride. He doesn’t want to keep kissing your ass, and you’re pissed off about it. If you won’t let us vote, then I won’t sit by and watch these people, my friends, die for your sick games and your pride.”
She could hear the murmurs growing in volume around her, felt the tension as everyone waited to see what Negan would do.
“You know where the door is,” he said as he gestured behind him. “No one is forcing anyone to stay here. But if you want to continue living the lovely, easy life you’ve seemed to grow accustomed to, you will fall. in. line.” Each word of his dripping with rage and threat.
“I’m not being unreasonable, Negan,” she pressed, “I just want you to consider less drastic options. I just want the bloodshed to end.”
Negan stared at her, rage nearly visibly radiating from him. Low agreements began filling the room.
After what felt like several minutes of a hate-filled staring contest, she began pushing through the crowd toward the exit.
“I can’t be part of it,” she said as she passed under his perch on the bridge, “I can’t watch you get us all killed.”
She left the building and began walking toward the vehicles parked outside. She heard the doors open behind her and turning, saw three women rushing toward her. “We want to go with you!” Tanya all but yelled at her as Negan’s remaining wives caught up to her.
They hadn’t made it to a vehicle yet when the doors opened again, and men began trickling out - a few at first, then more and more -all heading for their own bikes and trucks and muttering and griping. By the time the wives had loaded into the old SUV she pointed them to, the yard was filled with what looked like every Savior from the assembly, all preparing their own vehicles.
She did not try to hide her grin as she drove through the gates of the Sanctuary, and watched as the yard emptied behind her, following. She was almost giddy - it had worked so perfectly.
-------
No one was there when Rick and the small army he had gathered came to take Negan. They rounded each corner confused, finding every hall, every room, completely empty. Even the workers had abandoned the place, gathering supplies and food, first.
They found Negan sitting alone in his room, sipping his whiskey on his couch. He put up no fight as Rick tied him up and brought him back to Alexandria, locking him in the cell Morgan had built.
The End Will Justify It All - Chapter 2
Chapter 1 here
Warnings - there are some adult themes here and some language. 18+ only.
Nothing too crazy in this one, though. Its a bit long, and hopefully it's not a complete snooze, but I think the next couple in this series will pick up the pace. Feedback is welcome!
“No,” was all Daryl said, barely more than a breath, as she climbed into the back of the empty van and sat across from him. It was dark in the back of the van, but she could feel Daryl’s eyes boring into her. She could feel the anger pulsing off him. She didn’t know if he had heard what she’d said to get Negan to take her, if he understood why she was here, or if he was simply angry that Negan had taken yet another one of his people. She didn’t try to find out. She didn’t speak at all for the duration of the ride. It was too risky to try to let him in on the plan, with Savior ears just a few feet away in the front seat of the van, and anything else she would have wanted to say to him would have given their relationship away. She did risk one well timed touch of his hand, as the guys exited the van and walked around to the back. She squeezed tightly for a fraction of a second, as if she could transfer everything she was doing, or her promise to save him through her grip. A couple of guys ushered her inside before she could see where they hauled him.
“You’ll be in this room,” her less-than-friendly tour guide said, after leading her up 4 flights of stairs and into a large room that looked like it was once a break room. The far wall was lined with cabinets, a countertop midway up the wall, and an industrial looking sink embedded into its center. There were several saggy couches and chairs arranged comfortably in the center of the room, and a small refrigerator tucked into a corner near the cabinets. Each side wall held two doors, one of which her grumpy guide was holding open expectantly.
“Who is she?” a small, black-haired woman appeared in one of the doorways across the room. A taller redhead approached from behind the dark-haired woman, both examining the newcomer with scrutinizing eyes.
“New girl. She’s bunking in here, Negan expects you all to be accommodating,” Grumpy replied before nodding and heading for the hall. A moment after he exited the room, the unopened door beside her opened and two more women came out into the shared common room – a blonde and a tall brunette. Now that she could see all four women, she could see that across the gambit of physical differences – height, body type, hair color and length – they all had one very apparent thing in common. Every one of them was undeniably and objectively gorgeous. It didn’t take a whole lot of thought to guess who had collected them here.
“I’m y/n,” she awkwardly waved to the four pair of eyes that had not moved from her face since they entered. “I guess you all live here too?”
They blinked at her. No one spoke for what felt like five minutes, and she was just about to turn and acquaint herself with her new room when one of them – the small, raven-haired beauty – finally spoke. “Why are you here?”
Something about the way she asked the question, not gently but not threateningly, told her the question was not a challenge. She wondered what that meant for why each of them was here.
“I was with an outside group,” she answered, “when Negan and his guys found them and… had a discussion. I joined up and came here, and this is where they brought me. I didn’t really expect gender separated dorm-type housing, if I’m being honest. Is the whole compound housed like this?”
“No,” the one-woman welcome committee replied curtly. She’s fun.
“Has anyone talked to you about your role here with the Saviors?” the tall brunette asked, gently.
“No, they brought me straight up here and pointed me into this room. You’re the first people I’ve talked to since we drove away from my old group.”
The women exchanged looks she didn’t understand, like her answer explained everything. They all seemed to relax a little and moved to different seats around the room.
“I’m Sherry,” the brunette offered with a shy smile. “This is Amber,” she pointed to the leggy blonde stretching on the couch nearest Sherry’s chair. “Frankie,” she pointed to the redhead settling into a comfy armchair and picking up a worn paperback book on the table next to it. “And Tanya,” Sherry said as she pointed to the dark-haired one who had welcomed her so warmly, perched on the arm of the sofa next to Frankie. “We’re Negan’s wives.”
Oh. Oh.
Sherry kindly gave a short tour of the common room and their bedrooms. She explained that they had opted to share two to a room - Frankie and Tanya in one and Sherry and Amber in another – because none of them liked being alone at night. She showed her the bathroom through the door beside Frankie and Tanya’s room, and then into what would be her own room. The room was large enough to hold a queen-sized bed, a small makeup table, and a wardrobe. Though the space was clearly corporate before, it was almost homey with a large, plush rug and huge frosted windows letting the afternoon sun in to fill the room in diffused, warm light. Opening the wardrobe, she found a small collection of short, black dresses, stacks of black leggings and tops, and a pair of black high heels.
“If anything doesn’t fit, just take it to one of the guys out in the hall and tell them what size you need. They’ll get it for you,” Sherry explained. “Since you’re new, he will likely want to see you tonight. You’ll want to make sure you’re in one of the dresses.” Sherry gave her an apologetic look. “You’ll also want to bathe right before. It’s one of his requirements.”
---
She was brought to Negan’s room at dinner time. She’d taken Sherry’s advice and bathed. It took two baths to get all the grime of the night before off her. She still felt dirty, but her skin had been a light pink and was a little sore from scrubbing – as if she could scrub away the memory of what she’d seen, what they’d all lost – by the time she got out of the second bath.
She’d chosen the most modest dress in the wardrobe – a short spandex dress with a boatneck neckline, no sleeves, and leather pockets on both hips. She looked good and considered taking this with her when she and Daryl got out. He’d like her in this.
Evidently Negan did, too. He did not hide his predatory smile as he took in every inch of her in the tight dress and the high heels.
“Well, now, if I’d known out in those woods you could look like this,” he drawled, “I would have grabbed you up with the other guy to begin with.”
Never mind. She’d burn this dress if she got the chance.
“Please, have a seat and join me for dinner,” Negan continued, pulling out a chair for her at the small table in the kitchen area of his studio apartment. She could see a king-sized bed under large windows from where she sat, and had seen the sitting area behind her, with a couch, reclining chair, and coffee table, as she’d come in.
The table was set for two, a small roast on a serving dish in the center, and a large bowl of salad beside it. She realized as she took in the decadent scent that she had not eaten in over 24 hours. Her stomach growled loudly as evidence.
“You must be starving,” Negan said as he took his seat across from her. “Please, help yourself.”
“Do you invite all of your new recruits to a one-on-one dinner?” she asked him with a raised eyebrow and a side smirk.
Ew. Was she flirting with him? She knew she had to play nice but… maybe not that nice. Had he brought that out in her? She pushed the thought away and loaded her plate with the food, though she seemed to have lost her appetite.
“Unfortunately, not all of my new recruits look like you,” he replied with a devious grin. “Nor do they all come from Rick’s group…”
“Is that why I’m here?”
“Partly. We’ll get to that later.” As she forced her first bite of food down, Negan asked, “how are you liking my Sanctuary?”
She smiled sweetly at him as she answered carefully. “Truthfully, I haven’t seen much of it. I was led straight to my room and spent the rest of the afternoon settling in there. I did, however, meet your wives…” she gave him a knowing look as she continued, “I am apparently sharing a living space with them?”
“Ah. We’ll get to that, too. But first, how about an official tour, with the boss himself?” Negan rose from his seat and came around behind her to pull her chair out.
Negan offered her his arm as he guided her all over the factory. She hated to admit it, but he smelled good. Like minty soap, and bourbon. They walked for what felt like an hour, him showing her the living spaces for leaders, soldiers, and workers on each level, the large open warehouse area where he said gatherings and announcements happened. She nodded and asked a few minor questions as he showed her the open floor marketplace and explained the point system his people used as currency. She smiled sweetly at the cooks in the kitchens and oohed over the bikes and vehicles in the garages. Whatever she could do to make it look like she cared about any of this. Anyone they passed kneeled as they approached and didn’t stand again until Negan had well passed them. There was no sign of Daryl during any of the tour, no obvious holding cells for prisoners. Of course not, she thought, I’ve just hiked for an hour in five-inch heels with nothing to show for it…
Once again seated at Negan’s small dining table, a piece of frosted chocolate cake that had materialized in their absence now in front of her, she asked the question she dreaded the answer to. “So, what exactly will my role be here?”
“You haven’t guessed yet? There’s a reason you’re bunking with the rest of my wives.” He answered with a wicked grin. “Of course, if that’s your choice. Women get a choice here; nothing is forced on them. But I would hate for you to start your life here in debt. You see, my wives have everything they need or want. They have access to the whole compound, a queen in a palace. But if someone were to come in, take advantage of those things and refuse my hand… well, that person would need to pay for my generosity.”
Shit. The clothes, the bedroom, the bath she’d taken… this meal she’d forced down… she could only guess how steep the price would be. Her stomach turned again, she swallowed it down and pushed the thoughts away. She got herself here, she had to play the game. Somehow, thrown to the masses, fighting for her space there, and working off a debt to Negan didn’t sound like the easiest way to do what she came here to do.
She said after a moment, “does a wife ever get the chance to be…more?” She needed a reason to be out and about, a reason to be among the guys and walking the halls. “Like in addition? A working wife, so to speak.”
Negan rubbed his chin, contemplating. “What did you have in mind?”
“I can be useful. I can hunt, I can fight. I’m a decent shot, and I don’t mind getting my hands dirty. In fact, I prefer it. I’ve never been much good at sitting around.”
Negan thought for a moment. “Well now, we just met. I can’t go giving you everything all at once… but I am a reasonable man… I can be persuaded. You prove yourself good enough to be out there with my guys, while keeping up with all…wifely duties,” she had to fight back a shudder at his words, “then I’d say we might have a deal.”
Not ideal, she thought. But surely being both could get her access to places and information she could use. Access to Daryl, if she played it right. This could work. At the very least, it would give her plenty of access to Negan, which is helpful when you’re planning to kill someone.
“So… is there like a ceremony or something?”
---
Her whole body felt heavy as she returned to her room. She was someone's wife now. Not by any legal means, and certainly not from any religious ceremonies. She told herself with each step down the hall, through the common room, and to her bed that it didn't count. It wasn't real. It was all just a means to and end - a means to him. To Daryl.
Her bedside table caught her eye as she collapsed onto the bed. A bottle of water, a piece of paper, and were those pills?
"To help you sleep," the note read, "and not dream."
She knew it was from Sherry, though she didn't know how. What hell had Negan put them all through that their escape was a dreamless, drugged sleep?
She felt it then. Something stirring in her that told her Daryl wouldn't be the only one she would save from this place.
I typically don’t care for the unplanned pregnancy trope - but honestly I’m living for it in this story.
Can’t wait to read more!
Look for the Light - 3
Masterlist
Summary: Four years ago, Joel saved you from certain death. In return, you followed him faithfully. Always ready to do and give him whatever he asked, despite the hurt it inflicted on you, body and soul. Agreeing to go with him to deliver Ellie to the Fireflies… this would be the last time you’d follow him… After this, your debt would be paid.
Relationships: Reader x Joel Miller, Joel Miller & Ellie, Reader & Ellie
Warnings: Like AO3, I choose to give none. Read at your own risk. 18+ (So excited to share this with you. So much to come folks! 🙊😍)
Series Masterlist - Part 1, Part 2
You glanced in the back seat and smiled when you noted that Ellie had drifted off. You'd been on the road most of the day and you supposed that once the initial wonder of being in a car had worn off, the teenager had succumbed to sleep. None of you had slept much since setting off on this journey. The teenager had rattled on about things she'd heard at FEDRA school and asked questions whenever something unusual popped into view. The teenager had been quiet for the last hour however and you had relished the quiet at first.
Now it was choking.
Joel hadn't spoken a word to you since leaving Bill and Frank's. You knew he was struggling to come to terms with losing the two men. He had considered them friends in a messed up sort of way and to find out they'd killed themselves had been a huge blow. Especially so soon after losing Tess... And the journey continued that way until you came across an old service station, littered with cars.
"We need gas." He announced, pulling in and parking up.
Ellie was quick to jump out of the car and you chuckled at the teenager's enthusiasm.
"Where you goin'?" Joel called out when the teenager sprinted towards the building.
"I need a piss man." She grumbled and Joel nodded.
"I'll make sure the building's clear." You stated and Joel nodded at you, watching as you and Ellie disappeared inside.
You were quick to ascertain that the building was free of infected and people and left the girl to relieve herself in privacy. You pulled out your pack and rested it on the counter of the derelict cafe, pulling out the box you'd managed to find at the store a few days prior. Your hands were shaking as you pulled out its contents and stared at it, almost willing for what you were looking at to be different. scraping a hand over your face, you let out a shaky breath, willing yourself not to cry but finding yourself losing that battle.
"What are those?" Ellie asked as she sprinted up behind you, grabbing one off of the counter before you could stop her.
"Two dashes -Pregnant... One dash - Not pregnant..." She spoke as she studied it.
"Ellie please give that back." You pleaded but the teenager didn't listen.
"Well this one has two dashes so..." She trailed off as the realisation dawned on her and then her eyes drifted up to you "Wait are you pregnant?"
"Ellie-"
"Is it Joel's?" She interrupted as she glanced out the window before looking at the test again "It is isn't it!"
"Ellie please-"
"Man, he is gonna freaaaaak."
"I know okay!" You snapped, finally managing to snatch the test away from her.
"Where did you even find those?" She asked as she watched you stuff the tests back into your pack.
"The shop we had shit stashed in." You stated as you leaned against the counter and took a deep breath.
"You going to tell him?" She asked and you let out a long sigh before answering.
"Well, I'm going to have to." You grumbled, "Not something I can exactly hide from him."
"What you gonna do though?" She asked "You going to keep it?... Only I can't see Joel playing happy family."
"I don't know Ellie okay!" You choked "I don't know what I am going to do but I would appreciate it if you could keep this to yourself until I tell him."
"Sure... Course." She nodded and you released the breath you hadn't even realised you'd been holding.
"Thank you." You replied with a small nod "Come on. Should get out there before Joel comes looking."
Outside, Joel was leaning against one of the many abandoned cars that littered the area, fuel pumping from inside the tank into the can he had sat on the floor beside him.
"Good?" He asked and you nodded.
"Fine." You replied plainly, unable to miss the slight wince that appeared on his face when you spoke.
"We have to do this every hour?" Ellie asked as she watched Joel feed the pipe into another car's gas tank.
"Gas breaks down over time." He replied, eyes still focused on what he was doing "This stuff's almost water."
"Back in the day, we'd drive 10, 12 hours on one tank." You piped up and Ellie looked at you in awe.
"You could go anywhere." She stated and you nodded "So where'd you go?"
"Pretty much nowhere." Joel grumbled and you smirked at the man's reply.
He wasn't wrong.
Joel blew air through one of the pipes in his hand and you watched as the gas started to travel through the other one, the liquid pattering against the gas already in the can.
"Nice! How does that work?" Ellie asked, her interest piqued.
"It's a siphon." Stated Joel as he looked up at the teenager "It's when liquid... travels against gravity... because pressure..."
"You don't know." Ellie needled and you choked back a laugh at the girl's statement.
"I know it works." He replied, eyes wandering to you and your smirk soon disappeared.
Something Ellie keenly picked up on.
"You two gonna be fucking miserable around each other the whole way?... Cus I'm not sure I can handle much more of this sexual tension."
"There's no sexual tension." Joel grumbled and the teenager rolled her eyes at the man's reply.
"Sure there isn't." She mumbled as she turned around.
"No wandering." Joel called out and glanced at Ellie.
"Okay." The teen replied before pulling something from her pack "This is your fault then."
Joel look almost worried.
"It doesn't matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery."
You barked out a laugh that took not just Joel but yourself by surprise. You can't remember the last time you heard a joke. It had been a long time, that was for sure. Not much to joke about anymore.
"No Pun Intended, Volume Too, by Will Livingston." Ellie announced as she showed you both the cover of the book in her hands "Volume Too."
You rolled your eyes at the girl's enthusiasm before looking over at Joel who was shaking his head.
"Look. You get it? 'Too'? Like, T-o-o."
"Jesus." He grumbled.
"What did the mermaid wear to her math class?" Ellie continued and Joel's expression was one that almost looked like terror.
"An algae bra." She chuckled "Like, algae bra."
"Ellie-"
"I stayed up all night...
"No." Joel almost pleaded and you couldn’t not chuckle at the man's obvious discomfort.
"wondering where the sun went... and then it dawned on me."
"Feel free to wait in the truck." Joel growled, shutting the teenager up for the time being.
"Ugh, okay." She groaned " But just know, you can't escape Will Livingston." She warned, looking at you both as she stuffed the book back in her pack "He'll be back... There's nothing you can do to stop him."
Joel managed to get a decent amount of gas from the cars to last you a little while longer. You took the back seat so you could sleep a while, whilst Ellie took the front. She silently studied the landscape as it flew passed the window, careful when she spoke not to wake you. You made one more stop, swapping places with Ellie again so that she could sleep a while if she wanted to. Instead, the teen decided to rummage around in the back.
The girl found a tape that had filled the car with music and for a while, it felt like it was any normal road trip. Like the ones, you'd had with your parents as a kid.
"Oh, man." Called out Ellie "Got somethin' else."
Ellie was silent a while as she analysed what she had found, her eyes growing to the size of saucers at the images she saw.
"It's, uh... light on the reading, but it has some interesting pictures." She stated and that grabbed both your's and Joel's attention.
"Oh. No, no, no. Put that back." Joel ordered but the teenager didn't listen, snatching the mag bag when you tried to grab it from her "That's not for kids. Ellie." He warned but still, she didn't listen.
"How would he even walk around with that thing?"
"Please get rid of it." Joel pleaded and you once again found yourself smirking.
"Hold your horses." Ellie grumbled as she continued to flick through the pages "I wanna see what all the fuss is about."
Joel gave you a pleading look and you shrugged. You'd get the item from the teenager without endangering them all.
"Why are all these pages stuck together?" Ellie asked and suddenly Joel looked like a fish out of water "Uhh... the..."
"I'm just fuckin' with ya." She chuckled, swatting him with the magazine before sitting back and rolling down the window "Bye-bye, dude!" She chuckled as she threw the magazine from the car.
The music continued to play as Joel drove. The conversation between you and the child flowed easily as you talked to her about what she was seeing. She was a curious little thing and it warmed your heart. Your hand unconsciously rested on your stomach as you imagined what the child inside might look like. You imagined a little boy with dark eyes and wild curls. The perfect balance of you and Joel. The image took away the fear you'd been feeling since you learned about them. You still didn't know what you were going to do. This was no world for a baby but there was no safe way of getting rid of it either... and truth be told.
You didn't want to.
When the sky started to darken, Joel glanced at back Ellie before looking over at you and decided that it was probably time to call it a night. He could tell that you both were exhausted and he was too.
"All right. That's enough for today." He piped up and you looked over at him a moment before nodding at him.
He abruptly turned the truck and drove it across a field towards some woods. Driving a fair way in before parking the truck and pulling out some tins of food. After getting the gas stove going, Joel opened up some tins and started to heat them up in a metal tin pot, the smell making your mouth water.
A short while later you were eating the meal Joel had prepared, savouring the flavours. It was the meal you'd eaten in a long while. You knew the diet of jerky you'd been on couldn't have been giving the baby the nutrition it needed so you hoped a few days of decent meals would help it grow. The more your mind dwelt on the baby, the more attached to the idea of being a mum you became. So you decided you were going to keep it... Whether Joel wanted it or now.
"Slow down." Joel grumbled, pulling you from your thoughts.
"This is slow." Ellie mumbled around a mouthful of food.
"What am I even eating?" She asked as she forked another mouthful in.
"That is 20-year-old Chef Boyardee ravioli." Joel replied.
"That guy was good."
"I actually agree."
The three of you ate in silence a while before Ellie asked what you too were wondering.
"How long we staying out here?"
"I figure I sleep tonight... and drive tomorrow, all day, all night, get us to Wyoming by next mornin'."
"So can we start a fire? I'm freezing."
"Now, why am I gonna tell you no?" Joel snapped and Ellie rolled her eyes at the man's tone.
"Because Infected will see the smoke."
"No. Fungus isn't that smart." You piped up, grabbing the other's attention.
"She's right." Joel conceded "This is too remote
for Infected, anyway."
"People?" Ellie asked and you both nodded in unison "So what are they
gonna do? Rob us?"
"Oh, they'll have way more in mind than that." Joel grumbled and Ellie nodded. No more need be said on the matter.
You set up your sleeping bags for the night, one single light illuminating the camp. You said nothing whilst Ellie and Joel muttered things between the two of them. Your mind was going a million miles an hour whilst you stared at the box just visible inside your pack.
Your mind drifted back to the conversation you'd shared a little earlier with Ellie. The girl needled for clarity on what you were going to do about your situation.
"You need to tell him." She said as she glanced at the man who'd been unpacking the truck "Sooner rather than later."
You'd not said anything. Just nodded at him before graciously accepting the sleeping bag Joel had handed you. You'd set yours up a little away from theirs. Wanting space to think about how you were going to approach the subject. As you lay there staring at the sky you heard Ellie speak, the tone grabbing your attention.
"Can I ask you a serious question?" Her tone sounded almost frightened and your heart ached to reach out and comfort her.
"Yeah."
"Why did the scarecrow get an award?"
Your eyes instantly rolled but you stayed silent. Waiting for Joel to tell her off again.
"Because he was outstanding in his field." He replied and you guffawed at his reply.
Joel Miller had a sense of humour. You be damned!
"You dick!" Ellie laughed as Joel rolled back onto his side. "Did you read this?"
"No." Joel grumbled, pulling his sleeping back higher "Now go to sleep."
Silence settled in the camp for a while and you closed your eyes, willing sleep to come but Ellie's voice pulled you back, just as you felt rest tug just a little.
"Those people you said..." She trailed off, tone again a little frightened "There's no way anyone knows we're here, right?"
Your stomach dropped at her question. You'd be lying if you said you weren't frightened of being found. Especially now.
"No one's gonna find us."
"No one's gonna find us." Joel repeated.
"Okay."
With that, the girl allowed herself to close her eyes and you envied how quickly she fell into a deep slumber. You too allowed sleep to take you and you fell into a dreamless slumber. When you woke, the stars were still twinkling above you and you sighed, looking up to see what it was that must've woken you.
Joel was standing guard, gun in hand and you scraped a hand over your tired face before getting up from your bed.
"Can't sleep?" You asked quietly as you came to a stop at his side.
"Something like that." He replied, eyes scanning the darkness.
"What me to take over?"
"I'm fine." His tone was short and it snapped whatever patience you had left in half.
"God, you're an asshole." You grumbled and this grabbed his attention.
"What?"
"I'm sorry it was me instead of Tess." You grumbled as you turned your back to him "I know you'd rather have her here at your side but I can't change what happened."
"I don-"
"I shouldn't have come." You sobbed, wiping your tears with your sleeve "I keep following you around but you clearly don't want me around. I keep inflicting this hurt on myself and I can't do it anymore."
Joel grabbed your arm and turned you to face him. His expression was impossible to read in the dim light of the camp.
"I don't wish it had been you instead of Tess." He uttered, his face not inches away from yours "I have always wanted you around... Since the day I met you."
"What are you saying, Joel?"
He didn't answer with words. He kissed you hard and your hands instantly tangled in his hair as he walked you back. His lips travelled to your neck and you glanced at Ellie a moment before allowing yourself to succumb to the pleasure he was bringing you.
"Got to be quiet ." He whispered as he opened your jeans and pulled them down over your hips.
You nodded eagerly as you helped rid him of his own jeans before opening his shirt and running your hands over his warm flesh. He dropped to his knees, pulling you with him and you straddled his lap, whining at the feel of his erection rubbing against your folds. Your hand snaked between you and grabbed it, positioning it at your entrance before sinking down. Gasping at how well he filled you. Then you kissed him, the two of you swallowing each other's moans as you stayed there a moment, adjusting to his length.
"We haven't got long." Joel uttered against your lips and you nodded, glancing again at Ellie's back before you both started to move.
"Fuck." You choked as he hit that perfect spot over and over again.
The two of you moved in perfect sync. You met each one of his thrusts, noting how he was wincing. This couldn’t be good on his knees.
"Lay down." You uttered but he shook his head, increasing his pace when he felt you start to squeeze him.
"You close?" He asked and you nodded "Cum for me."
And you did. Your heat squeezed him so tight that he came without warning, suddenly racing to pull out but it was too late.
"Shit." He grumbled as he scrambled to get dressed again "Shit, shit shit!"
"Joel-"
"I shouldn't have cum in you." He growled, berating himself under his breath "Fuck."
"Joel, calm down."
"Calm down??" He growled "Do you get what this means?"
"Yes." You spat, keeping your voice low.
"You could end up pregnant." He growled and you threw your head back, letting out a long sigh as you glanced over at your pack.
He watched as you got up, carefully pulling something from your bag before heading back over to him. Your hands were shaking as you knelt down opposite him, clutching the truth in your hands tightly.
"We can't let that happen." Joel uttered, his brows drawn together "We can't bring a baby into our situation."
You let out a sigh before holding the tests out so he could see them. His eyes drifted from you to what you were holding out to him, his eyes widening as he studied the items carefully.
"It's a bit late for that Joel." You replied plainly, pulling his gaze back to you "I'm already pregnant."
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Michonne: I dare you to kiss the next person who walks into this room.
Y/N: Screw that, I’m not kissing any of you.
*Rick walks in*
Y/N: Fine, I’ll do it. Rules are rules you know
Birthday Girl
Mikey Berzatto x Female Reader
Summary: You show up at The Beef on your birthday, a bit earlier than Mikey was expecting you. But that’s alright, you’ll still get your birthday gift, dont you worry.
Warnings: explicit language, explicit sexual content, oral sex, unprotected sex, public sex, creampie, teasing, praises, pet names
Word count: 4.1k
A/N: Hi hellooo! So, this is a late birthday gift for my sweet @chelseasdagger because I know how hard she fell for Mikey, especially with how he looks in season 2? The beard?! I mean we all love it right? Thank you @suitsofwo3 for proofreading this mess and I hope those of you who choose to read it will enjoy it. This is my first time writing for Mikey so I hope I did him justice but if I didn’t…dont tell me, thank you.
@chelseasdagger Pea I hope you’ll like this, this is all written with you in mind, and I know we talked about a lot of different ideas for birthday fics over the year and this is I guess a bit different but I hope its still okay. I love you, happy birthday!
You straighten up the dress one last time and clear your throat, mentally preparing yourself for the chaos that’s about to ensue the moment you step through the door of the Berzatto restaurant. You loved The Beef, of course you did. You enjoyed most of the time you chose to spend helping around the sandwich shop, but you also knew how overwhelming it could get.
Pushing the designated staff door on the back of the building, you step inside.
“CORNER!”
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Early 30s, happily married mom, and also happily obsessed with my TV and book boyfriends. Writing is new for me. Hope you like what you read!
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