Do You Think Of Me As Often As I Think Of You?

all this effort for what?? im still fucking disgusting, ugly and pathetic. i feel so fucking useless. what’s the fucking point of trying anymore? i can’t see it.

i dont know if i ever could really.

i was born weird and i will die fucking weird

my insides feel rotten, i dont feel like a real person

Paranoia is crazy cause when i sh its fine but the second it's someone I care about I have to know every time and everything about it or I'm going to assume you bleeding out on the bathroom floor

SH culture is wanting to rip out your own gvts and bleed out on the sidewalk or just completely mutilate your body beyond repair but also being horribly afraid of death as a concept 👍

.

I feel like we both like each other but I don't want to be wrong and say something first cause I don't think I could live knowing I like her and she doesn't like me but at the same time I want to say something but I'm to scared to

I don't understand this feeling I care for this person so much and I want them to be happy and have everything they want but I need there validation I just want them to be happy and when there happy I'm happy

I’ve been engaging in behaviours not beneficial to my wellbeing

I can't cry, I can't eat. Mentally, I'm numb; physically, I feel sick. I’m slowly deteriorating.