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Am I the only one who noticed this? I think Mao Mao also fits in on the aroace part, what other characters fit in?

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Ryoko Kui saying that Mithrun is living happily doing his hobby post-canon is so important to me

Like I have a whole fic to write about this, but I adore Kui’s redemption arcs, so to speak. And that’s not even the right word, imo, like the point isn’t that Mithrun had to redeem himself (despite what he himself might have thought); the point is that he deserves to be happy just like anyone else. That he accepts himself and starts to heal and can achieve a fulfilling life.

(source: Korean Q&A signing event)

If you can’t think of anything to say about a fic, writers also like to know:

- what time it is

- how long you’ve been reading

- how many chapters you’ve covered in the last 24 hours

- what you were late for because you were reading

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- the emotional outbreaks you’re experiencing

- the inappropriate place you’re having said outbreak

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Nowhere, Black Sorrow and an interpretation of Ivan's love

Gonna talk a bit about Ivan's emotional state in Nowhere and how it… is mostly right there in Black Sorrow too, just in a slightly more matured manner. I've got some similarities and differences I wanna highlight!

(It'd be good to read my lil initial impressions on the release of Nowhere first, tho!)

Firstly, the key thing about interpreting the content of Nowhere is that it's a private song. Written for Ivan himself, composed with no outside input, never meant for public performance. Therefore, in it, we can trust that Ivan is expressing himself as freely as he can (through the lens of his stunted emotional development yet strong ability to look inward and rationalize, but still), which is a very rare occurrence, given that one of his biggest traits is being private and cagey. The song Nowhere is raw emotion for a change, an open display of his head and heart.

And it sounds like just that. We hear the result of Ivan trying a romantic, ballad-like love song, starting with that and presumably just scrapping it for the subsequent melodic, hopeless freestyle rap session about his loneliness, pain, sense of being fundamentally unlovable/unwanted, belief that his existence is devoid of value and his pessimism.

But the love he knows he feels for Till IS there, fantastically represented by the ballad-like part that stays in the background for the rest of Nowhere. And it's recognized for what it is. 

… which is a big deal in itself!! Ivan talks down on his capacity for love a lot and would later call it a "shallow emotion", but he's way too analytical and knows himself too well to be avoiding that love is what it is. He damn well knows he's in love. And this song, the earliest song in his musical timeline, is pretty much the only place he says it out loud. 

Followed, of course, by all those verses about his meaningless and inconsequential life, being overwhelmed yet persisting calmly/numbly, the light he can't look at and dreams/hopes that are unreachable from the beginning because everything (and himself) is stained. And yet, the recognition of his emotions stays running in the background; to be literal about it, his feeling of love stays present and sung no matter how deep he dives into his bleak outlook. Constant, steady, never drowned out. Two things that are truths to Ivan. It feels to me like precisely the two factors that govern his inner emotional life: the belief that he's not built for it and the knowledge that he loves, regardless.

And "this always happens to me" is the sentiment that results from all that, taking the spotlight as the general mood and baseline of Nowhere. 

His belief that that the boy he was in the slums - a human who didn't feel like he belonged anywhere, neither an equal existence in relation to the segyein nor feeling part of humanity, a type of existence that's stained and rejected - is the same person he is in Anakt Garden and the ame persona he will continue to be. Of course, that applies to his love too. Not gonna work out because that's just how it is for someone like him, another piece of the "this always happens to me", destined to be unwanted. 

(We've gotta remember that Nowhere was written at the time he was living in Anakt Garden [source: official post], the time where he developed his feelings for Till and tried to be close to him in ways that neither Till nor Ivan himself could understand properly - so, is it surprising at all that he'd continue to feel mismatched with other humans, stained, wrong and hopeless? My personal belief here is that what he experiences with Till echoes with what he experienced in the slums, all contributing to sustain his view and thoughts about himself as an individual. It's all the same. Again: this always happens to him.)

Now here's the thing: that defeatist attitude about loving Till is honestly the same one he carries over to Black Sorrow and is guided by throughout all of the main Alien Stage storyline.

Another thing that's very important to remember in regards to THAT is that Ivan never told Till how he felt in any type of way, he also didn't intend to show it or let it be known in way Till could interpret, understand and give an answer to [source: Vivimeng Q&A at the 2024 GAF event of which we only have attendee records]. He mostly fought, made up, played and spent time with Till. The most straightforward example of "acting upon his feelings" we could refer to is when he asked Till if he wanted to kiss [source: official comic], which was absolutely not framed as a confession of romantic inclinations, but just as "something some kids in Anakt are doing". It was neither expressed nor understood for its true human meaning. Ivan never says anything because he has simply assumed that he's unlovable, considers himself rejected by default (he's aware Till likes Mizi, but it's been made clear that this is mostly irrelevant to him, Till could love anybody or no one at all and he'd still have his pessimistic outlook because he considers himself the problem [source: GAF event Q&A again]) and leaves it at that. Around the segyein, he even goes out of his way to protect either Till, the privacy of his own feelings or the nature of love (as one of the few freedoms pet-humans have) by giving the impression that they're not that close and Till is not that important to him [source: Ivan interview from the Alien Stage Patreon, specifically these bits].

With that said, let's recall Black Sorrow.

It's inevitably different because it's not the raw and fully honest Ivan, but a song meant for performing, for an audience and for the competition. Still, it's his character introduction song and it's the one that tells us his viewpoint on Till. And in it, his definition of love is already, well, that it's "his black sorrow". A feeling surrounded by darkness, love for someone unreachable, the knowledge that it ends in a "cold spot stained with blood", not meant to work out for him in any way. Just as he thought at the time of Nowhere. 

Because that always happens to him. He thinks that way in Black Sorrow, he thought that way in Nowhere, he still thinks that way in Cure.

But there's one thing that's extremely different between Black Sorrow and Nowhere! And I think it's an important aspect of Ivan that the new song and the new opportunity for character analysis allow us to bring forward.

It's in this little moment, the prelude to the climax of Black Sorrow:

When the first point tally is coming, no matter when you pause the video, Ivan's points are gonna be the same as Marty's. Unlike in Blink Gone, with Luka shown to be leading and Till falling in second place, Ivan and Marty don't know how it's going. But they'll get their final count soon, so this is the point where things need to get real serious. And it's the point when – as he watches the set's falling stars – Ivan dives into his most painful but also very important memory with Till. Through which we reach the song's climax, his performance turns much more emotional and he ultimately crushes Marty's score by a great margin.

What I'm trying to say is: in Black Sorrow, Ivan is in a very similar place as he was in Nowhere, in regards to his emotions and his love. We can assume he's more accustomed to it. But most of all, he's purposefully tapping into his feelings (both his love and his pain), drawing strength from them to deliver a winning performance. It's like opening his chest up and reaching into his heart, yes, but it's also done in a very controlled manner, because as soon as he's able, Ivan composes himself. When he finishes performing, he's his usual calm self again. 

(Writing this I realize I'll need another post to dive deeper into Black Sorrow alone to cover some more points that are unique to the song, so I'll leave that for later.)

And that's the aspect of his character that I think is so important to highlight, the fact that he just… know himself so well. And how, despite viewing himself negatively in some ways, he also greatly accepts himself.

Nowhere is a very downbeat song, of course we're all face down in puddles of tears for Ivan, but him? I think it'd be… in a way, misjudging and underestimating him to settle on a very depressive or fully self-loathing view of him. Because he's pessimistic, but in a rational, "that's exactly how things are" kinda way. He looks down on what he considers his bad sides, but also keeps them close and doesn't hesitate to use all of his skills and traits. He's hurting, but he remains collected and undefeated by his various pains. He's emotionally vulnerable but also SO full of sentiment, determined, clever, capable of great acts of gentleness and dedicated as few will ever be. 

And, when it comes to his love for Till, his belief that it's doomed to be unrequited doesn't stop him from continuing to feel that way, continuing to look after Till, drawing strength from his love when needed and ultimately do what must be done to push for Till's victory in Cure.

That's all for now! Please remember that these are only my views and that for this piece I focused on interpreting Ivan's love in particular in the context of Nowhere tied to Black Sorrow, so other themes are not as covered (not because they're not important in Nowhere or his whole character, of course) and even most of the nature of that same love is also not covered. I'll continue to write more analysis posts if possible.

I hope it's been an interesting read!

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current mantra

Want to know everything that's ever happened in Project Sekai but don't have time to read all those stories? Guess what! For the low, low price of "it seems fun", I'll be summarizing every single event!

I'll be using official or trusted fan translations whenever possible. If none exist, I'll then rely on Google Translate as a last resort.

Please be patient with me as I build this blog! This is a passion project at heart, so other priorities can and will come first. However, if there's an event you'd really love a summary of, feel free to request it and I'll put it first on the priority list! Otherwise, events will be summarized chronologically. (I'll also do occasional card stories!)

If you have a question about any of the stories as well, feel free to ask and I will do my best to answer!

Masterpost below the cut. All summaries will be tagged by unit, character appearances, and special type, if applicable.

Leo/need Key Stories

Main Story

Stella After the Rain (Saki1)

Don't Let Doubts Hold You Back (Honami1)

Twilight Parade (Shiho mixed)

Singing Among the Cherry Blossoms (Ichika mixed)

Resonating with You (Shiho1) (ARC1 ENDER)

Unnamed Harmony (Saki2)

Knock the Future!! (Ichika1)

Putting feelings into words (Honami2)

That day, the Sky was Far Away (Shiho2)

Live with Memories (Ichika2)

No Seek No Find (Saki3)

Don't lose faith! (Shiho3)

Echo My Melody (Ichika3)

Little Bravers! (Honami3) (LATEST EN EVENT)

get over it. (Saki4)

Connected by our Stellar Song (Ichika4) (ARC2 ENDER)

Stick to your faith (Shiho4)

The Courage to Lead, the Kindness in my Heart (Honami4)

MORE! MORE! JUMP! Key Stories

Main Story

Time to Re:Start! (Airi1)

Color of Myself! (Shizuku1)

Hear Me! HOPEFUL SHOW! (Minori1)

You deserve it! Break Time! (Haruka1)

Happy Lovely Everyday! (Airi1)

MORE MORE Making Christmas (Minori2) (ARC1 ENDER)

Cast a Spell on You! (Shizuku2)

Tied By Painful Hope (Haruka2)

Chasing The Sparkle Beyond the Blue Sky (Airi3)

Dear Me, From Back Them (Minori3)

Beyond The Dream of That Day (Haruka3)

At The End of The Unraveled Thread (Shizuku3) (LATEST EN EVENT)

Re-Tie Freindship (Airi4)

Step by Step! (Minori4) (ARC2 ENDER)

The Warmth that Guides Us (Shizuku4)

The Scars Left Behind, With Time (Minori5)

Vivid BAD SQUAD Key Stories

Main Story

Singing in Sync (An1)

NOCTURNE Interlude (Toya1)

STRAY BAD DOG (Akito1)

Awakening Beat (Kohane1)

Bout for Beside You (An2)

Same Dreams, Same Colors (Toya2)

Legend Still Vivid (Kohane2)

POWER OF UNITY (Akito2)

The Vivid Old Tale (An3)

Walk on and on (Toya3)

Find A Way Out (Akito3)

Kick it Up a Notch (Kohane3) (LATEST EN EVENT)

Light Up the Fire (An4)

On Your Feet (Kohane4) (ARC2 ENDER)

Burn My Soul (Akito4)

BREAK DOWN THE WALL (WORLD LINK)

Wonderlands x Showtime Key Stories

Main Story

It's On! Wonder Halloween! (Rui1)

On This Holy Night, I Sing (Nene1)

Smile of a Dreamer (Emu1)

Wonder Magical Showtime! (Tsukasa1) (ARC1 ENDER)

Mesmerized by Mermaids (Nene2)

Revival my Dream (Rui2) (Skipped in EN)

Pop! In My Heart! (Emu2)

On this Stage of Dazzling Light (Tsukasa2)

Desperate Times?! Island Panic! (Nene3)

A Sorrowful Farewell at the Curtain Call (Rui3)

Happy New Year! Lion Dance Robot's New Year's Show! (Tsukasa mixed)

To The Gleaming Stars Halfway Through a Dream (Emu3) (LATEST EN EVENT)

Towards the Phoenix in the Distant Sky (Tsukasa3)

The Canary Sings in a Quagmire (Nene4)

Our Happy Ending (Emu4) (ARC2 ENDER)

A Story where You are the Star (Tsukasa4)

Backlight Lens Flare (Rui4)

Nightcord at 25:00 Key Stories

Main Story

Imprisoned Marionette (Mafuyu1)

Insatiable Pale Color (Ena1)

Secret Distance (Mizuki1)

What's on your mind? Exciting Picnic! (Ena mixed)

Carnation Recollection (Kanade1)

Mirage of Light (Mafuyu2)

My Footsteps, Your Destination (Mizuki2)

Someday, From the Depths of Despair (Kanade2)

On This Blank Canvas, I Paint (Ena2)

What Lies Beyond Guiding a Lost Child (Mafuyu3)

And Now, This Ribbon is Tied (Mizuki3)

At This Festival Bathed in Twilight (Mafuyu mixed)

Hope Will Someday Go Beyond the Morning (Ena3) (LATEST EN EVENT)

Immiscible Discord (Kanade3)

Our Escape for Survival (Mizuki4)

Saying Goodbye to my Persona (Mafuyu4) (ARC2 ENDER)

Searching for a Reflection Underneath the Water (WORLD LINK)

The Tone Played on That Day (Kanade4)

MIXED EVENTS

Run! Sports Festival! Committee Rush (Emu, Miyajou)

Kamiyama High Festival! (Mizuki, Kamikou)

SEKAI Happy New Year! (Miku, all) (New Years)

Twilight Parade (Shiho, L/n and Wxs)

Doll Festival at the Tenma's (Saki, L/n, WxS, Toya)

Singing Among the Cherry Blossoms (Ichika, all units) (0.5 anni)

What's on your mind? Exciting Picnic! (Ena, n25, MMJ, WxS)

An Ode for the Pure of Heart (Toya, L/n, VBS, WxS) (Wedding)

The Sounds of a Summer Festival! (Akito, MMJ, VBS, n25)

The BEST Summer Ever! (Honami, Miyajou)

The Moon Rabbit & Us (Shizuku, L/n, MMJ, n25)

Scramble Fan Festa! (Minori, all) (1 anni)

Time to hang out (Kohane, MMJ, VBS)

The Warmth of Intersecting Melodies (Mafuyu, L/n, n25)

The Tomorrow We Hope For (Haruka, all) (New Years)

Secret Operation Valentine's Day (Airi, L/n, MMJ, WxS) (Valentine's)

A Gentleman Theif's Thrilling White Day ?! (Tsukasa, all units) (White Day)

Connected through SEKAI's Cherry Blossoms (Miku, all) (1.5 anni)

The Climax! Kamiyama Cheer Squad! (Rui, Kamikou)

Wishing to the Blue Sky for Your Happiness! (An, MMJ, VBS) (Wedding)

Let's Enjoy Together! Spojoy Park (Kanade, L/n, MMJ, VBS, n25)

CLOSE GAME OFFLINE (Nene, VBS, WXS)

Paint What I Love, Rainbow Canvas! (Ena, L/n, WxS, n25)

At This Festival Bathed in Twilight (Mafuyu, all) (2 anni)

Screaming?! Welcome to the Forest of Wolves! (Kohane, all units)

Raise Your Bow in a Snow-White World (Shizuki, Miyajou)

Happy New Year! Lion Dance Robot's New Years's Show! (Tsukasa, all) (New Years)

Memories that Come with the Scent of Candles (Ichika, L/n, WxS, n25) (Valentine's)

Never Give Up Cooking! (Toya, L/n, VBS, WxS) (White Day) (LATEST EN EVENT)

In the Corner of a Resonant Town (Shiho, all units) (2.5 anni)

One-Day Trip Before Setting Sail (Haruka, Miyajou)

Standing Next to the Kind and Gentle You (Honami, L/n, WxS, n25) (Wedding)

A Once in a Lifetime Pandemonium?! (Rui, 3rd years)

Slapstick Cafe REC (Airi, L/n, MMJ, n25)

Let your song resonate through SEKAI! (Miku, all units)

Weaving Precious Memories with You (Saki, Miyajou)

Let's Study Hard! (An, Kamikou)

Hello Good Day! (Ichika, all) (3 anni)

The Best Picture Wrap! (Nene, VBS, WxS)

Over Here! Over There! The Zookeeper Experience! (Minori, Miyajou)

Next to the Unchaning Warmth (Mizuki, all units) (New Years)

Take the Best Shot! (Kohane, MMJ, VBS, n25) (Valentine's)

Relax Teatime (Kanade, L/n, MMJ, n25) (White Day)