𝚁𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝙾𝚗𝚎 𝚁𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚢 𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝

Heyyaaa Mousey! How are you feeling right now? Hope its well. (◍•ᴗ•◍)

Okay soooo remember that one headcanon you posted its about that how would the spouses react if Mr. Qi threatened them to divorce the farmer… because I think the blue dude is practically bored and his only entertainment is the farmer going action but since farmer is busy with his family life. And Mr. Qi thinks that romantic feelings or family life are “distracting” to them. And since you wrote a headcannon with the vanilla marriageable npcs. Then how about a reaction from the SVE & RSV marriageable candidates. Imagine the chaos this brings. And sorry about my english. 😅

Hey hey Hime 👋 I'm doing fine, thanks for asking 😃

Another headcanon about Mr. Qi kidnapping Farmer's spouse? Hell yeah :) Funny, while I was writing again hedcanons about this topic, I remembered that one of the most important conditions for achieving Perfection in game is the wedding/getting a roommate, so that Farmer gets a Starfruit in 12 ❤️ And now Qi is like no no no, that's it, I've changed my mind, you have lived a married life a little bit and that's enough, go back to perform my tests. And he shouldn't be threatening Farmer's spouse/neighbour in general... just increase the reward for the test and Farmer will come running, lmao.

Oh well, I got a little distracted... Anyway, good to see you again, thanks for the ask! Have a great day ☺️

I'll take Qi's speech from the previous headcanon with vanilla characters, so we'll skip that part here!

_________________________________________

Stardew Valley Expanded:

There was no sight of terror on Lance's face after Mr. Qi's ultimatum. He kept his composure, confidently clutched the hilt of his sword with his right hand, in case anything happened, but was in no hurry to pull the weapon. The pink-haired adventurer carefully considered his future move, calculating the chances of winning the fight or chances of escape. The situation was complicated, but in the name of protecting his family, Lance had no right to panic.

"Nice to finally meet you... Mister Qi." Magnus knew that the mage community would sooner or later encounter this... person (was he even a person?), but he didn't think that this 'honour' would fall to him. And the immediate threats, of course... Qi may have taken Rasmodius by surprise, but he's underestimating the talent of the wizard, who is ready to instantly disintegrate the insolent man who dares to threaten Magnus' spouse. He's not about to back down...

"W- what?" Victor stood stiffly, unable to digest all the information that had been dumped on his head. This man was claiming that Farmer owed him something? To perform some kind of test? And Victor is getting in the way of all of this way?! Victor don't understand... but he's not about to let someone force Farmer to do it and threaten them and Victor. But at the same time he's scared, for there is definitely magic involved, and he doesn't know what else this Qi can do...

Mr. Qi was a little amazed that Claire was practically calm. Too calm. Naturally, surprise splashed in her eyes, but nothing more. Qi even got curious, so he asked the cashier if she was scared at all. Claire replied that "this is one of the most strangest dreams ever" and pinched herself on the arm. The unpleasant sensation made her twitch... and quickly her calm was replaced by horror. "No, my dear. Not the dream," Qi replied, "should I repeat everything I've said all over again?"

Olivia will be confused to the core of her being that she won't immediately respond to Mr. Qi with such a bold ultimatum. However, after the meaning of his words reach her, the former Joja accountant will be overwhelmed with anger. How dare this creep kidnap her and threaten her and her spouse! Her family! A fraction of fear is present, but more Olivia will be angry and demand to take her back, or else Qi himself will have consequences.

Sophia fell to her knees and covered her face with the palms, holding back her screams and tears. This person was slowly approaching her, the clomping of his heels echoing in the room. Sophia clutched her eyes harder and began to mutter something. Only when Mr. Qi got close enough to her, he heard what the pink-haired young woman, who was scared to death, was whispering. "Wake up, wake up, please.... it's just a nightmare..." "Are you sure about that?" And then Sophia screamed as hard as she could.

The frightened Scarlett didn't say anything to Qi, took a few steps back, trying to get as far away from him as possible, but afraid to make any sudden movements. The urge to run far away, anywhere, just so she wouldn't have to feel someone else's gaze on her, was overwhelming, though. "You're not going anywhere until you choose-" "I DON'T WANT TO CHOOSE! LEAVE ME AND FARMER ALONE!" Scarlett interrupted Qi with scream, shivering and trying to figure out where to run to find Farmer, Sophia, her parents, anyone who could help.

Ridgeside Village:

The muzzle of the gun pointed at Qi gave Bryle some confidence in this strange and frightening situation. Though after this mysterious blue man had laughed at the Governor bodyguard's 'toy', Bryle's confidence began to slowly evaporate. Shit, what is going on, who is this creep and how does he know Farmer? 'My warrior,' what the hell is this!? "Fuck you." He probably shouldn't have snapped at him, but the desperation was making him start to panic a little. Fuck, he need to warn Farmer...

"Whatever it is, I'm sure we can come to an agreement," in truth, Zayne didn't want to negotiate anything with this man and his brash demands, but he realised that the situation wasn't on his side. Qi himself had to give Zayne credit - the young head of a wealthy family didn't chicken out, didn't beg for mercy by bargaining for his life, and clearly loved Farmer enough. Impressively... But not enough for him to leave the 'problem' of Farmer's abandoned trials unresolved.

Jio didn't reply anything to Mr. Qi, only lightning-fast drew his katana from its sheath, getting into a fighting stance. He realised that the person before him was a dangerous opponent, the very one his Lady had been trying to find for a long time. Not a human, an anomaly. But the elf would not allow anyone to threaten those dear to him, his soul, his mate... His spouse and children... If fate has decreed it so - so be it, but Jio will protect his family to the last drop of blood.

"Or you could ask them politely to fulfil, uhhh.... your challenge?" June tried to find a way out of this difficult situation, trying to convince this... stranger not to make any hasty decisions. But truth be told, the pianist doesn't want Farmer to perform any (most likely - dangerous and illegal) tests of this weirdo at all. Aloud, of course, he will not say, because what if the threats of this "Mister Qi" are not empty....

Anton almost gave his consent to Qi's ultimatum, when the mysterious blue man began not only to manipulate the architect, but also began to humiliate him. The phrase 'you don't deserve someone like Farmer anyway,' definitely left a huge crack in Anton's heart. But only he wanted to open his mouth to agree to the divorce, at that moment remembered the moment when Farmer handed him the Mermaid pendant that now hangs around his neck. No, he couldn't betray them that easily... "Screw you." He's already prepared for the worst.

"Ahahahahaha, great joke, very funny. So, where's your hidden camera?" Oh, Sean was scared for a minute at all of this, but realised it was just a prank (a bit dumb prank, by the way) and waited for the lights to come back on and everyone to come out shouting "Gotcha!" Who ever came up with this stupid idea for this prank in the first place..... With a snap of his fingers, Qi made Sean fall to his knees from the sharp pain in his chest. "Still think this is a joke?" Now the handyman believed him.

Shiro remained silent and didn't want to agree to such an ultimatum . But he's not going to say something not very decent either, as unfortunately his current state of health won't allow him to defend himself against the attack of this deranged man. His mind says that he should give his consent to save Farmer and himself, but his heart screams refusal. Still have to listen to the voice of reason though. Even if he agrees, Farmer will still be in danger.

"Okay, now let me go!" Yoba witnessed, Jeric didn't want to agree to any demands, but realised that the chances of escaping or defeating this Qi were very slim. Agreeing to anything, just so he can warn Bryle and Farmer about this madman. "Then sign it." Some paper with finely written text and a pen formed, hovering right beside the young farmer. There was no way he dared to take that pen. "I'm waiting." Damn, what should Jeric do...

Philip only laughed nervously and took very slow steps backwards. The situation was bizarre to the point where he even thought for a moment that this was some kind of horrible nightmare and Qi was a sleep paralysis demon. "You're not leaving until you file for divorce," and dozens of pairs of eyes glared at the physiotherapist, forcing him to stand still. "I'm still waiting," Mister Qi's voice became more impatient, making Philip shake all over. He didn't want to, but he feared for himself and his spouse.

Rivers of tears were running down Ian's face, it was all too much for the poor man. "Why are you doing all thi?! Why?! What have we done to you!" His voice trailed off into a scream that echoed throughout the dark room. Just his life was starting to get better, he'd found his soulmate, everything was great, and then - fate handed this man who was ruining his and Farmer's lives just because he was bored. Ian falls to his knees and begins to sob quietly.

"If you care so much about Farmer, you'll have to go along with it. You'll save both them and your own life. You're smart, kid, sure you would do the right thing," Qi is definitely right about something: Kenneth is indeed smart. Smart enough to realise that Qi won't just leave him and Farmer alone, even if Kenneth divorces his spouse. Maybe the electrician himself won't interest Qi anymore, but Farmer... Kenneth hates to think what the bastard has in mind for Farmer with his "trials." But he still has to agree to Qi's demand - if he doesn't save himself, he won't save Farmer either.

This Mister Qi is greatly deluded since he thinks he can scare Corine so easily. She and Farmer aren't puppets for someone to play, toying with their lives like it's all just a game. The waitress won't be able to defeat him, that's for sure - she can feel Qi's strong, dark aura. But she's not going to give up either. In the left pocket of her work apron is a miniature totem, a small relic given to her by that elf she met recently. Who, by the way, she's also going to ask for help before she escapes from this place.

It's impossible to imagine the effort it took for Daia to suppress the urge to spit some insult or sarcasm in Qi's face after his words. Because the ninja realized that she wasn't in a position to be frivolous and arrogant. She had a very dangerous opponent in front of her, the same one her Lady had mentioned earlier. Daia is not going to abandon Farmer, but she definitely needs to play along with Qi in order to get out of this situation alive and warn her spouse and the Cult members.

"I'm not afraid of you," but Blair's teeth chattered, showing her fear. She held her fishing rod tightly, preparing to swing it like a weapon. Except that didn't give her much confidence. Only a minute ago she was fishing in peace and preparing to go home to Farmer, and already this stranger is demanding her divorcing her spouse or face the consequences of refusing. The fisherwoman wants to attack Qi first, to take him by surprise, but.... she's terribly afraid.

Mr. Qi didn't even have time to say anything to his 'guest' before Alissa interrupted him with a heartbreaking scream, terrified of her being kidnapped straight from the Ridgeside Village to this, this... dark and strange place. Qi even cringed at the high notes of the girl's scream, Farmer's partner really did have... a striking voice. Alissa didn't understand what Qi was trying to say for the second time, she was gripped by terror.

"You... You... How dare you, you brute!" Faye, out of anger, threw her fan with all her might right into the face of her insolent captor, hoping that the thrown object would hit his eye or nose. The fan hit Qi's face, but the mysterious blue man didn't even flinch, just continued to stare at the waitress. His smile slowly slid down, giving Faye goosebumps. Perhaps it was a rash act, because this Qi was angry and would hurt her and Farmer.

"Is this what you do for a living? Destroying people's lives just because you feel like it?" Kiarra's words were full of bitterness and hatred for the man who stood before her in dark space. The graphic designer felt absolutely defenceless, broken, unable to somehow resist this evil man who stood there smiling contentedly, guessing what she was about to say to him. Kiarra could only hope that Farmer would forgive her for breaking their heart, but she needed to save their life. And she definitely needs to survive to find someone who can help her.

Letting out a cry, Maddie threw her bag at Qi, and when the blue man dodged, clenched her fists and started throwing punches. Miss, miss, miss, miss again, but Maddie, cornered, was gripped by rage and fear. Until unknown threads tied her hands behind her back, and Qi, completely unaffected by the lab assistant, stood by while she calmed down. There was nothing left for the poor girl but to fall to her knees and start sobbing.

Irene thought her past kidnapping for her further ransom from the Amethyne family had been the worst experience of the cook's life. The mere bandits that got her caught up and thought they would get their money's worth, but ended up getting justice, as messing with Maive wasn't good. Qi on the other hand was demonstrating magic, a power unprecedented to Irene that she realised: not even the head Amethyne and Farmer would find her here. She would either die or have to leave Farmer for good. Yoba, why it's not just the bandits again, why...

"Tsk, you're smarter than that, kid." Mr. Qi shook his head disapprovingly as Paula pulled out her army knife and prepared to hurl the weapon at her captor. He could have guessed that the doctor wouldn't listen to him so easily, this stubborn girl. "I'll have to take your toy," and after these words the knife, as if it had a will of its own, was yanked from the hands of the shocked Paula. "Now back to our problem-" "You're the only one with a problem, scum!" Sigh, Qi will have to quiet Paula down before threatening her.

Flor tries her best to read Qi, tries to see if he's bluffing or not when he promised very unpleasant consequences to her and her spouse if she doesn't do as he demands. If Farmer is, as this stranger himself claims, his "hero," "the chosen one," what's the point of him harming them? Logically, carefully, she tries to change Mister Qi's mind. Because she realises that, at this point, words are her only weapon.

Ysabelle looks at Mr. Qi with horror, turns around and runs away. Wherever the girl's eyes look, there is almost total darkness, and immediately in that darkness forms the silhouette of a blue man, smiling mockingly at the frightened girl. "Where are you going?" Poor Ysabelle runs in different directions, but in the end the outcome is the same. There is no way for her to escape, but she runs anyway, to find a way home. "Lea-" *pant* "Leave me alone!"

Holy shit! I can't believe this mod has a cutscene of Sebby proposing to you. 😳😍😭

I clicked the 2nd option. Don't want my character be dramatic if I click the 1st option. (˘･_･˘)

Seriously?! Right infront of the whole town. Tbh Farmer Aleia much prefer a private proposal, but oh well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The writing is good though.

Sheeesh Seb, with the amount of spicy scenes I've seen with you and my Farmer Aleia. I wouldn't be surprised if its more than riding on a bike is what you guys do. 😂

Mod: "Maggs Immersive Sebastian Dialogue and Custom Events Spicy or Sweet" by MaggPlays

Me: *spots a ridiculously hot elf man* Ooooh, a new NPC to add to my collection.

Brain: *sighs* You do realize this means making another farmer OC, right?

Me: *eyes sparkling* I don’t care. He’s so hot. Like Jio with tattoos. Approachable, mysterious, and an elf who seems like he’d hold a conversation instead of just brooding. But hey- Jio’s still my ultimate elf man. Loyalty matters. This guy’s just... bonus content.

Brain: Ma’am. You already have six farmer OCs. SIX. It took you an hour to make your last one just because you wanted to romance that gridball player for that immersive mod!

Me: *shrugs* Yeah, but I haven’t made a farmer with jet black hair or brunette yet.

Brain: And you’re forgetting you’ve got perfectly good farmer designs reserved for a certain mean cold adventurer.

Me: *glaring* Shut. Up. I’m taking this elf man.

Brain: *deadpan* You should really download that Free Love mod.

Me: *thinks* Nah, I’m a one-romance-at-a-time kind of player.

Brain: Uh-huh. You do realize you’re about to create a whole new OC backstory, right?

Me: *staring into the distance, deep in thought* Shuuush... already thinking of a new farmer design.

Brain: Unbelievable. Truly, unbelievable.

Tohtalem OC: Progress!

I finally got our Elf to load in game with a custom map/location and a couple of events! My friend and I will be filling in more dialogue and events over the next few weeks, I'm just so happy the base character is done!!

First week, no-heart dialogue

Just had this unhinged crossover headcanon about my FOM farmer, Isaria, she's the cousin of my two SDV farmer sisters, Cerise and Rosemary. Now, imagine a family reunion where they introduce their lovers to each other. If you're confused, here's the lineup: Isaria is with Caldarus, Cerise is with Jio, and Rosemary is with Lance.

Now, picture how awkward that would be.

Caldarus is a dragon guardian of Mistria, Lance is a combat mage from the First Slash Clan, and Jio is not only an assassin but also an elf and a member of the Cult of the Lady with the Red Tail. Lance would probably be thrilled to meet an actual dragon, while Jio ever the cautious one would find Caldarus intimidating. Meanwhile, Caldarus though outwardly polite for Isaria’s sake, would remain on high alert, sensing the intense auras between these two men… and even those of Isaria’s cousins, especially Cerise.

Still out of respect for his farmer, he keeps his composure. But oh boy, the tension in that room would be off the charts.

[𝙵𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚢 𝚁𝚎𝚞𝚗𝚒𝚘𝚗 – 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚈𝚎𝚝 𝚂𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝙲𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚣𝚎𝚍 𝙶𝚊𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐]

[Cerise, Rosemary, and Isaria stand together while their partners linger nearby. The air crackles with unspoken tension.]

Lance: *grinning, composed yet intrigued* A dragon guardian… Quite the rare sight. It is an honor to meet you.

Caldarus: *soft-spoken, yet watchful* And you must be the mage Isaria spoke of. The honor is mine.

Jio: *arms crossed, unimpressed* A dragon, a mage, and an assassin in one room. Sounds like the start of a bad joke.

Rosemary: *muttering* More like a disaster waiting to happen.

Lance: *chuckles* Oh, I assure you, I mean no trouble. Though I must admit, meeting a dragon is… fascinating.

Caldarus: *calmly observing both men* Likewise. It is rare to stand among those who carry such powerful auras.

Jio: *lowers voice, glancing at Cerise* I don’t trust him.

Cerise: *calmly sips tea* You don’t trust anyone.

Isaria: *forcing a smile* Okay! Let’s all just sit down and eat, yes? No battles, no tension, just a nice, peaceful meal.

[Caldarus offers a polite nod, ever the composed guardian. Jio remains wary, and Lance though clearly intrigued respects the unspoken boundaries. Out of respect for their partners, they all (reluctantly) take their seats.]

Rosemary: *whispering to Cerise* Ten gold says something breaks before dessert.

Cerise: Make it twenty.

Summary: After stumbling upon a mysterious stone on Ginger Island, Rosemary unwittingly activates a portal to an unfamiliar realm, Terraria. Pulled into a bizarre and perilous world, she must navigate its dangers while searching for a way back home. All while acquiring an unusual collection of souvenirs, including a rather explosive pet. Meanwhile, her sudden disappearance throws her loved ones into chaos, sparking a frantic search across the world to bring her back.

A/N: This story was inspired by a tumblr post from @studentinpursuitofclouds about the Farmer opening a portal to Terraria for the Meowmere and ending up stranded. I couldn’t resist turning it into a full story! I love the idea of Rosemary getting isekai’d into Terraria, unfazed, while everyone in Stardew Valley panics. Expect adventure, chaos, and dramatic reactions when she returns. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it!

The story is a bit long, so you can read it on my AO3! That’s right, I finally have an AO3 account after what feels like a thousand years!

Humbly asking for your horny Jio rant (≧ω≦。)!!!!

(I am ravenous for even the smallest of crumbs)

Summary: [RSV] Jio NSFW Alphabet (I pick my favorite letters so nothing's in order!) Warning(s): 18+ filth (Im not holding back, y'all have been warned) Kinda nothing tbh I'm literally just spitting from the mouth and hoping it makes sense. Rough Sex + Dub-con(?) (In letter D but it's Jio's imagination), Side note(s): Oh girl/boy/sibling...ANON BUCKLE UP. I struggled writing this ngl, I could write a fucking essay about how much this man means to me but I didn't want to use a ask to just rant away so...this is like a normal NSFW ABC fic but with some humor (my horny rantings) sprinkled in so lol, be on the lookout for those.

quick side note ; to the poor unfortunate souls that may come across this post don't have a single fucking clue who Jio is. This is Jio from the RSV mod aka the man I'd willingly slut myself out to.

extra note alert ; Before we begin though, I want to make one thing really clear.

I'm biased as all hell toward Jio because I have the biggest thing for elves. Woman, man, doesn't matter to me. If they have pointy ears and are unusually attractive and tall, then I'm all in dude. So with that being said? Please believe me when I say that stars shot from my eye sockets when I learned this man was an elf.

AND THAT'S NOT EVEN THE BEST PART.

A = Aftercare (What they're like after sex)

Jio would be the king of aftercare. His dialogue already implies that him and farmer get freaky on the regular so he'll definitely ask you if you need any water or if anywhere is a little more sore than the usual (in which case, he's giving you a massage that puts professionals to shame). But if you say no to any of these and state that you'd rather just cuddle, he's pulling you closer to his body immediately and whispering sweet words to you as he pets your head until you go to sleep.

♡ - "Drink," The soft-spoken word made you steadily crack your eyes open before, through your hazy vision, you saw Jio standing over you with a cup of water in his hand. You snickered quietly to yourself as you propped yourself on your arm to take it, the crispy refreshing taste of the liquid going down your throat both hydrating you as well as giving your body a jolt of awakeness. And as a delicious ache ran through your body, particularly in-between your legs after you and Jio's love-making session.

Your cheeks started to darken and warm a little at the memory of what you and your husband had done only a few minutes ago. Something that Jio quickly picked up on as he smirked at the alluring sight of you growing more and more embarrassed from your own thoughts. "Something on your mind, my love?"

B = Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

Jio would definitely be proud of his muscles. There's a scene where the farmer openly gawks at him when he's meditating in his spouse area so I think after seeing his spouse so openly drool over him. He'd become more focused on his muscles when he trains and would definitely give the farmer a little show every now and again. As for the farmer, though? As cheesy as this response is, I think Jio would love every part of you, there's no part that he favors really because he thinks your literal being is a blessing in his eyes. This means there's definitely a lot of body worship during sex.

♡ - You felt like you were on cloud nine right now as Jio kissed every available surface area of skin on your body.

Each time his lips would ghost over your skin. The more your thighs twitched with the urge to clench if it weren't for your husband situating himself between them, his hand teasingly petting at your soaked cunt much to your dismay. "J-Jio..." You begged, the sound of your whiny voice making the elf throb in his pants before he looked up at you through hooded eyes. He placed one last kiss on your hand before he responded with a throaty "Yes"?

"Please..."

You hated how you felt yourself throb at the sight of him smirking at you, almost as if he were a fox who just an inch closer to capturing his prey. "Please what, my star?" He turned your hand over to press a kiss in the middle of your palm before he moved down to your stomach, kissing down and closer and closer to the area you wanted him most until he stopped again. "You have to be more specific, begging aimlessly won't get you anywhere."

You pouted. "T-There." You tried gesturing to your aching pussy by grinding forward against his clothed dick, eliciting a sharp hiss from him. Yet, as quickly as you tried to seduce him into giving up on reminding you of his manners, he moved back a little to avoid any more of your tempting ministrations.

"You know how to ask properly, not by acting like a tempting vixen." He pinched your thigh lightly as a warning, a whine escaping your lips as you ran your tongue over them.

"Please...touch my pussy, I-I need you."

His praising smile felt like it could light up your very soul. "As you wish, my star."

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically)

Okay so— I feel like when it comes to Jio himself? He's not big on cumming on you. Since he sees as no less than a goddess basically, in his eyes? Cumming on you is degrading, no matter how much you try to convince him that you're into it. However, cumming inside of you is definitely on the books, he loves it. As for you though? This man is a total Munch Master 365 days out of the year. Want to ride his face until he squirts on you? He's into it. When he fucks you and he sees your slick beginning to drip from your hole and onto the floor, he has to resist the urge to eat you out in order to continue stuffing you full. Your cum is essentially ambrosia to him, he could go hours drinking you down and he's never going to be fully satisfied.

♡ - He couldn't get enough of your sweet nectar.

Your delicious slick that dripped from your needy cunt after just a few minutes of foreplay. Jio would've had a mind to laugh if he weren't so focused on sucking on your clit right now, his arms locked around your thighs to keep you from closing them as you moaned and pulled at his hair, the stinging pain encouraging him to keep going in his ministrations whilst he struggled to try and keep a close eye on you.

But, from the combined fact that his head was swirling from both your taste and his growing lust, as well as his bare cock twitching against the bedsheets, the little friction it had from his grinding against the sheets only did enough to make him needier and needier for your warmth rather than actually getting him off!

Then again, in the face of your pleading eyes looking down at him in a silent bid for him to keep going until you came...

How was he able to deny such an expression?

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He definitely would've had a dirty imagination about you once or twice before you two even started dating. However, they would mostly be along the lines of "Yoba, this farmer is so annoying because they say hi to me every day...let me fuck them to take my frustrations out on them". Now, when these thoughts would pop up, he would definitely try to bury them, to the point no matter how hard his dick if after thinking about it. He's not going to falter and touch himself. But oh boy, does it cause him to start to see you in a new light after starting to think about what you look like under your clothes.

♡ - Typically, Jio was in control of himself much more than this.

He wasn't aware of a single thing in this world that could shake his foundations or make him waver in his beliefs. But...it seemed that you were a unique exception because, for the last few nights since the night the two of you began talking since your victory in the Spirit World. His mind has been...plagued, with certain imaginations that is.

Imaginations that focused on the topic of how annoyed he was of you.

It was infuriating how you didn't understand the words 'Go Away'.

So, in the deepest reaches of his mind, he knew the perfect method to make you understand how much he disliked you. He'd approach you in a forest, perhaps you would already be on your way to talk to him one-sidedly once more, and he'd pull you towards him before smashing his lips against you.

His cock would twitch inside his pants at the sound of your needy moan, eager and possibly elated at the fact that you were finally getting the attention you were seeking from the very beginning as Jio swiftly pressed you against the bark of a tree and flip up your skirt.

"Tch," He click his tongue at the sight of your soaked panties, lightly pinching your backside when you wiggled your ass to tempt him into giving you more. "...Such a needy thing, hold still. I'll give you what you so eagerly want." He'd whisper, more to himself rather than you as he quickly freed his cock and wasted no more time to pull your panties to the side before he stuffed you full in one thrust.

Yet the second he'd begin to move...he'd snap himself of his thoughts.

Now the elf was faced with a new task. To find a way to calm his raging hard-on, he refused to fall into the pit of temptation that he was so certain you were trying to lead him into.

extra note ; Continuing on my last point—

He's. A. Tsundere.

He's. Mean (with that hidden sweet side to spice it all up)

And not to expose myself but I fucking love mean men. And to be honest? I'll go a step further. THEY DON'T EVEN HAVE TO BE NICE??? During the Ridgeside quest line, the first two years of my playthrough revolved around J I O, and with every single mean dialogue he dished my way, I licked right up.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

I think of Jio as a half-in-half case. On most nights, he's super romantic and likes to treat your body as if it was gifted to him by Heaven itself (i.e If you're not confusing the moment for a Wattpad scene then he's thinking he hasn't done enough). On the flip side though, he'll ditch the romance if he's super pent-up or if you're explicitly asking for him to treat you a lil' more roughly.

♡ - His heart felt like it was close to bursting.

Within the dimly lit room of your shared bedroom, the soft sounds of your sexes meeting could be heard as he trusted up into you as you sat on his lap, the two of you sharing a hugging embrace as his cock twitched inside of you at the sound of your moans.

But, his orgasm was steadily becoming an afterthought as all Jio could focus on was you. After all that he had been through in his life, all the sacrifices he's made—

How could he be so lucky to be with you in this moment?

To have your love and attention?

"My love," He panted out, his voice uncharacteristically breathless and whiny as he nearly pleaded for your eyes to be on him. Shakily, you took your face from the crook in his neck to look at him, your hands sliding up his body until they cupped his face. And from that simple action alone, the elf had fallen deeper in love with you.

"Y-Yes" You responded to him, your face somehow warming even more as you looked into your husband's lovesick eyes. A small smile was on his smile and his cheeks as well as the tips of his ears appeared flushed.

Jio smiled as you caressed and held his cheeks before his face fell to rest in the valley between your breasts. "You're so pretty." He sighed dreamily.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation Headcanon)

He doesn't jerk off much, to be honest. (And to be honest? I feel like his libido doesn't really "activate" unless you're around him) Even when you two are in a relationship and I fully believe it's because 1. He's usually too busy/focused on his missions to think of rubbing one out or 2. He has you so if he's in the mood then he'll just go to you. But should you not be in the picture at the moment? He'll just get himself off to a piece of clothing that smells like you or his imagination.

♡ - "Fuuckk..." Jio whispered to himself as he sat on the edge of the bed, his hand slowly stroking his cock as he breathed in the smell of your scent from a shirt you left behind on the bed. The combination of that plus the imagination of your hands being the one on his dick rather than his own...it made for a pretty convincing moment that led him closer and closer to his orgasm.

It wasn't often that the elf masturbated. It wouldn't ever compare to the real thing.

But...when you said you'd be on Ginger Island for the next few days to attend to businesses there, he was expected to uphold the task of keeping things here on your farm in order.

And he'd do just that.

However, he didn't expect that his body would react so strongly to your absence. Even as his ministrations on himself slowly got faster and faster on his cock, going so far as to even spit on his dick to try and poorly imitate your slick and how it'd make your movements faster.

It was dull in comparison.

So dull that as his hands slowed and he came to a stop. All he felt was boredom. "...Yoba," He hissed in frustration.

He'd simply wait until you returned.

final note alert ; I saved my biggest thought bubble for the end so here we go-

Jio is the best-modded husband hands-down. Literally fight me on this. It's hard to convey my thoughts fully without giving concrete evidence (+ the fact that I'm going based off my memory since I haven't done a playthrough of the RSV questline in a lil' bit) but I think that anyone who's on the fence of RSV needs to give it a shot, even if it's just for Jio 💀. Like deadass, the whole reason I started this blog in the first place was to have a reason to rant about this man every now and again before it became a place for me to rant about hot people in general.

To reiterate, I'm biased as hell because I have a thing for elves and mean guys but seriously to anyone who reads this.

GIVE RSV A TRY.

Hot elf guy aside, the character stories in the mod are super good. Like I'd recommend Shiro, June, Ian etc. ANYDAY OF THE WEEK. I can't imagine my modded Stardew without Ridgeside Village so-

YEAH PLAY THE MOD SO I HAVE MORE PEOPLE TO RANT ABOUT THE HOT MEN WITH <33

Summary: Aleia, a farmer with vibrant magenta hair, approached the carpenter's shop in the mountains. Little did she know her visit would lead to a surprising adventure.

Fall had settled upon the land like a colorful blanket and it seemed almost alive with the rustling of leaves dancing in the wind. Aleia, the farmer with her distinctive magenta hair, briskly walked through the mountains, heading towards the carpenter's shop. Little did she know that this visit would lead to an unexpected adventure, and not just in terms of renovation plans.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a crisp breeze that carried the distant scent of a wood fire from a nearby hearth. She shivered and continued her trek, feeling the leaves crunch under her boots.

Aleia finally reached the carpenter's shop, situated among the trees. She pushed open the door, the creak sounding loud in the quiet air. The room was warm and cozy, filled with the scent of cut wood and sawdust. Robin, the carpenter, greeted her with a smile. After exchanging pleasantries, Aleia asked about the renovation plans for her farmhouse. Robin began to lay out the diagrams and sketches, explaining the different options they had. However, despite Aleia's attempts to pay attention, her mind kept wandering to Sebastian, the carpenter's son and the emo boy who had captured her heart.

As she was about to leave, Aleia decided to go downstairs to Sebastian's room. She opened the door and found the room empty, the only sound coming from the creaking of the old floorboards. A pang of disappointment shot through her. Sebastian was not there, as she was about to turn and leave, something caught her eye, a small piece of paper lying on Sebastian's desk. Curious, she picked it up and at the top, written in Sebastian's neat angular handwriting, was her name.

Aleia was surprised and intrigued, she unfolded the piece of paper and saw that it was a riddle. It seemed that Sebastian had gone to the trouble of leaving her a game, like a scavenger hunt. The farmer only chuckled, feeling a flutter of excitement in her chest. She'd always found Sebastian's secretive and enigmatic side endearing.

The first clue led Aleia to the mountain lake. The water shimmering like a giant jewel in the sun. Pinned into the bark of one of the trees, she noticed a piece of paper. She pulled it out and unfolded it to reveal the next clue. It directed her to the saloon. Aleia strolled towards the town, her thoughts filled with anticipation.

When she reached the saloon, it was quiet, save for the low hum of conversation. She spotted the next clue resting on top of the pool table. She glanced around the room but saw no sign of Sebastian. The only patrons in the saloon were a few old regulars, who paid her little attention as they sipped their drinks and played cards. Aleia carefully retrieved the clue without drawing any attention. The paper indicated that the next clue could be found at the beach. She folded it carefully and placed it in her pocket then left the saloon and began walking towards the beach, the wind toying with strands of her hair.

When she reached the beach, Aleia immediately spotted a trail of rose petals leading towards the dock. She followed them, her boots crunching softly in the sand. The sun was lower in the sky now, the long shadows of the trees stretching out like fingers across the beach.

Finally, she reached the end of the dock, where Sebastian stood, his back turned towards her, looking out over the water. The setting sun cast a golden glow over him, making his dark hair even more intense against his pale skin. As if he heard her footsteps, Sebastian turned and smiled, his eyes seeming to light up at the sight of her. The rose petals swirled up from the dock around her feet, the fragrance of roses mixing with the salty smell of the water. One petal floated away, caught by the gentle breeze and landing on Aleia's cheek.

Aleia caught it with her fingers, feeling the velvety softness as it fluttered against her skin. She looked up at Sebastian, her heart skipping a beat at the sight of him standing there alone on the dock, waiting for her.

Sebastian took a few steps closer to her, the deck creaking slightly under his feet. He reached out and took her hand gently, his fingers intertwining with hers. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver through Aleia, and she found herself wondering what was going through his mind. For a moment, they stood there in silence, just looking at each other. Sebastian seemed to be working up the courage to say something, his fingers playing nervously with the hem of her sleeve. Aleia waited, her eyes never leaving his face.

Finally, Sebastian spoke, his voice soft and low. "You found all the clues." he said, trying to sound casual, but unable to keep the slight tremble out of his words. Aleia nodded, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "I did." she said, squeezing his hand gently, "And they led me here."

Sebastian blushed slightly, the pink creeping up his cheeks. He swallowed hard and opened his mouth, but no words came out. He looked down at their hands, still joined together, and then back up at Aleia. His expression was a mixture of nervousness and determination. "I had this whole sappy speech prepared." he said suddenly. "But now that you're here, I can't remember a single word."

Aleia chuckled, her eyes growing soft as she looked up at him. "I don't need a speech." she said, her voice gentle. "Just tell me what you wanted to say." Sebastian took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts. He looked deep into her eyes and, without letting go of her hand, "Aleia, you're the most important person in the world to me. I've been holding back for too long, afraid of what might happen, afraid of messing things up. But I can't hide my feelings any longer."

Aleia felt her heart skip a beat as she heard his words. She'd known that Sebastian felt something for her, but hearing it out loud made her feel giddy and light-headed. She moved a little closer, her fingers tightening their grip on his hand.

Sebastian continued, his words coming out in a rush. "I want to be with you." he said. "I'm tired of waiting and pretending. I want to be your boyfriend. You're the sun to my night, the light to my dark, and I can't imagine my life without you anymore."

Aleia felt tears pricking at the corners of her eyes, but she held them back, not wanting to ruin the moment. Instead, she closed the distance between them in one stride and ran her fingers through his hair. Sebastian's eyes widened in surprise, but he didn't pull back. Instead, he leaned into her touch, his lips just millimeters away from hers.

For a moment, neither of them moved, the silence between them thick and full of expectation. Then, Aleia spoke. "You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to say that." she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. Sebastian's eyes flickered with hope and relief. "So...does that mean-!" he began, but Aleia cut him off with a kiss.

Sebastian was taken aback by her unexpected move, but he quickly recovered and kissed her back, his free hand sliding around her waist and pulling her closer. Aleia wrapped her arms around his neck, their bodies pressed firmly against each other. The kiss was tentative at first, a gentle, soft press of lips, but it quickly deepened, becoming more urgent and passionate. The air around them seemed electrified, the only sounds their laboured breaths and the gentle lapping of the waves against the dock. Aleia's heart was racing, her mind a whirl of emotions as their kiss continued, neither one of them willing to break the connection between them. She lost herself in the sensation, the feeling of Sebastian's lips on hers and his arms around her, pulling her even closer.

Eventually, the need for air became too overwhelming, and they pulled apart, gasping and panting. Sebastian rested his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed as he fought to control his breathing. Aleia laughed softly, the sound breaking the silence between them and making Sebastian's eyes flutter open.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that." Sebastian said, his voice rough with emotion. Aleia smiled, her fingers tracing the lines of his face. "I think I do." she whispered, her own voice shaking slightly. "And I'm guessing that it's been as long as I've wanted you to do it." Sebastian returned her smile, and the two of them fell into a comfortable silence, standing on the dock surrounded by the peaceful sound of the waves and the setting sun.

Finally, Sebastian spoke again. "You know, this wasn't exactly how I planned this." he said, looking a little sheepish. Aleia chuckled and leaned her head against his chest. "I like it better this way." she replied. "Spontaneous and heartfelt. Just like you." Sebastian let out an embarrassed chuckle and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.

The sun was sinking lower now, the sky ablaze with purples and oranges as the day gave way to night. Aleia and Sebastian stood there on the dock, wrapped up in each other's arms, not wanting to let go. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

"Thank you for waiting for me." Sebastian whispered. Aleia looked up at him, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "It was worth it." she replied, her voice thick with emotion. "Every second." They kissed again, their lips meeting in a gentle, tender kiss, sealing the promise of a future together.

As the sun sank below the horizon, the sky turned a deep, inky blue, and the stars began to twinkle. Sebastian, reluctantly, pulled back from Aleia, his hands still resting on her waist. "We should probably head back." he said, his voice laced with disappointment. "It's getting dark."

Aleia sighed but nodded her agreement. However, she had a different idea in mind. "You know." she said, her tone casual. "You could stay the night at my place."

Sebastian's eyes widened at her suggestion, his cheeks turning slightly pink. He hadn't expected her to say that, and the thought of spending the night with her alone, made his heart race faster. "Are you sure?" he asked, his voice cracking a little.

Aleia smiled, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Of course, I'm sure." she replied, leaning against him. "I have a comfy bed, plenty of blankets, and we can make breakfast together in the morning."

Sebastian tried and failed to keep a straight face. The thought of sharing a bed with Aleia, even just for one night, was both thrilling and a little bit scary. But he couldn't say no to her.

"Okay." he said, his voice a little shaky. "I'll stay the night." Aleia's smile widened, and she gave him a quick, triumphant kiss on the cheek. "Great!" she said, taking his hand. "Let's go then."

They walked together in silence for a while, their footsteps crunching on the dirt path. Sebastian's mind was racing, thinking about what the night might bring. He glanced at Aleia, who was walking next to him with a small, satisfied smile on her face as they reached the farmhouse, the warm, inviting light from the windows spilling out onto the path, Sebastian couldn't help but feel a mix of nerves and excitement. He was about to spend the night with the girl he adored, and he couldn't wait to see what the night would bring. With one last squeeze of his hand, Aleia led him inside, leaving the quiet night air behind as the door quietly closed behind them.

(Here's a bunch of screenshots that inspired me to write this oneshot.)

Ngl this cutscene was just perfect. The fall leaves gently drifting into the wind, and the dock surrounded by those rose petals, making the scene super romantic. Perfect setup for a real heartfelt talk under the sunset. 😍

Mod: "Maggs Immersive Sebastian Dialogue and Custom Events Spicy or Sweet" by @maggplays (I apologise for tagging you everyday. 😣 I just really love your mods and each cutscenes I encounter during my playthrough its giving me writing inspiration. You deserve to be mentioned.)

Since 1.15 now released, I was looking through the Stardew Valley Expanded changelog hoping to find new updates and particularly any new marriageable NPC options. However, to my disappointment, I discovered that only Scarlet has been added as a marriageable candidate. Where are the other desired NPCs like Isaac, Alesia, Jadu or Camilla? It's quite disappointing to see they're still unavailable for marriage in the game. Damn it! •́ ‿ ,•̀

Plot twist: Unknown to the mages and adventurers. Farmer was just acting the entire time. Despite all their prized possessions being removed from their person. They still have access to their CJB Cheats. Farmer simply stands up dusting their clothes despite being surrounded by monsters but their not showing any pain. The spectators finds this shocking. The Farmer flips off their (soon to be ex) lovers and teleports away. Decides to reset the day and avoid that encounter again or maybe break up with them.

I'm calling it now: there's going to be a group-ten heart cutscene with every Castle Village marriagable where they all confront the Farmer if they're dating all of them in the next update. Any thoughts on the idea? 😛

*Rubbing my hands together in anticipation* Oh-ho-ho-ho, I want to believe that they'll add this event in update 2.0. Well, I think so at least because in the vanilla version of the group 10❤️ event only Victor was added, but not Lance and Magnus. So there is a suggestion that there will be a separate group event for the two of them and the other residents of Castle Village.

About my thoughts.... Hehehe, it would be funny if the resourceful adventurers didn't just give Farmer the cold shoulder, but punished them somehow. Make them look like an idiot in front of everyone, use magic, or something along those lines.... Quite deservedly, btw, since Farmer played with their feelings like that, they'll play with Farmer's feelings too.

I don't know, however, what role Camilla will play in this. Because I think she's going to have a special event about it, or at least a special role. She likes to pry, so she'll definitely be keeping an eye on Farmer's love affairs. And either Camilla will tease them or punish them harder than all the adventurers put together if Farmer cheated on her.

𝙶𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚁𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝚂𝚊𝚖'𝚜 𝙳𝚒𝚊𝚕𝚘𝚐𝚞𝚎

Ever since I installed the Maggs Sam Immersive Mod, I've been trying to woo this cute rockstar for the past couple of in-game months, but I hadn't checked his dialogue during some specific events, like the Green Rain event. But today, I toggled the CJB Cheats menu and switched the weather even though its Fall Season. And wow, his dialogues are downright adorable! He showed so much concern, it was incredibly sweet.

Mod: "Maggs Immersive Sam Romance Dialogue and Events (x)Spicy or Sweet 1.6" by @maggplays