Just An Extremely Normal Thing To Say

I'm pretty sure that it's perfectly normal to sometimes have an occasional, random, vague little worry that you were molested as a kid and completely blocked out any memory of it, and now have no way to ever find out. Everyone thinks about that sometimes.

JOINTS IS PAIN

my problem is, i dont give a damn when random folks say this shit to me because there are no emotional stakes -- i have no clue who the fuck u are and vice versa so i dont give a damn telling u to fuck off all the way to the deepest depths of the ocean.

its when ur friends and family says this shit to u.

because u know most of the time, they're trying to understand. they're not TRYING to be transphobic, meaning their intention is not to make me feel badly about my identity nor my decision to medically transition. it still makes a pit drop in my stomach every time i have to defend myself in a gods-be-damned debate about my personal autonomy; and i have no idea how to tell friends and family and people i love that they're pushing a negative stereotype without realizing while also begging for the eradication of discrimination and oppression within their own marginalized communities -- essentially acting hypocritical without meaning to because they don't fucking know any better which is why they're talking to me about it.

i love teaching. i love informing people and having discussions and learning from anyone i can, even kids -- i guess im just tired of being a walking example to teach people about how to interact with queer or disabled folks. im a normal human being who's grown and who's made their own decisions for the past decade.

people have invented so many different ways of rephrasing "don't transition" to sound plausibly progressive enough to bystanders that they'll think trans people are over-dramatic for reacting negatively to it.

medical transition is permanent so you should really consider it thoroughly and put off trying it unless you know for sure. yes, just keep second guessing yourself. 6 months, 3 years, 20 years...

you might not like how you look. other people might not like how you look. you might not look cis. don't you want to be desirable? do you want to risk feeling worse and more insecure? you look so good now! we think you're so hot right now, and you wouldn't want to change your body and make it not hot to us, right?

you are so valid if you don't transition. you don't need to transition. no one needs to transition. it's just cosmetic, it's just aesthetic, it's all optional and means nothing at all. (no, of course this is unrelated to arguments used for insurance not covering transition, or doctors denying care.)

why do you even want to transition? are you trying to look cis? are you trying to adhere to beauty standards? are you doing this to look hot? that's regressive and outdated and assimilationist. (if you want us to take your politics seriously, you shouldn't transition)

it's a waste of resources/privileged/bourgeois to transition. it's kind of morally suspect that you would transition and still ask for help ever in your life. why should we support someone who's transitioning if they're obviously not oppressed anyway.

DIY HRT is too dangerous. you could hurt your body. you could get arrested. your life will probably end if you take HRT. if you can't access HRT legally, you just shouldn't take it. not for transphobic reasons!! just for your own sake <3

like when will it end

At their core, these people are bullies. The cruelty is the point.