„take Me To Snurch (snail Church)”

yikes and here I thought I had problems

Imagine internalising that guns are the solution to your sensory problems

I'm trying to write a story. What if there was an autistic character who grew up around violence due to living in an area with gang warfare and has frequent experiences with bullying at an inner city school? Also their parents are very neglectful or abusive towards them.

That sounds like it could be a ver interesting story.

I don't want a fancy grave, but if I got one, I'd want my tombstone to be a realistic, life-sized statue of me. Not in any particular position, but the key feature of it is that it doesn't have a head. My comical goose neck just ends in a perfectly even, stable platter, whereupon anyone who visits the grave can place whatever object they think would be funny to put there to be my head.

Make it the city's longest ongoing joke, people visiting the grave and sharing on social media whatever my head currently is. Usually it's a seasonal fruit, or something goofy. Sometimes in the winter it's just a snowball, made into a snowman's head. One year a particularly brave or stupid bird couple makes a nest there. Nobody dares to disturb that one for a long while, but once it's clear the birds are gone, the empty nest is gone one day, replaced with the kettle part of a broken electric kettle.

Most people don't know, remember or care whose grave this originally even was. It's just the Headless Man of the Cemetery, whose head is frequently replaced with a completely new and random piece of nonsense, in death just like it was in life.

Wider community benefit to not experiencing adult relationships the way other people do, and not having a line between "acquaintance" and "friend" — If I do interact with others, tend to make people feel "included"... by accident?

When someone says, "pass this gift along to a friend", I immediately think of everyone in my neighborhood I've ever had a friendly interaction with.

I don't experience an "in-group" and an "out-group". i just... interact with people. So when I think of doing something nice for people from church for Christmas, I don't think of it as "outreach" vs "visiting friends". It's all equal to me.

Sometimes it means being overly friendly to someone who wonders why I'm acting "like we're friends" when we're not. Sometimes it means thinking of someone who's desperately lonely and is glad I remembered them. I never know unless they tell me.

refseek.com

www.worldcat.org/

link.springer.com

http://bioline.org.br/

repec.org

science.gov

pdfdrive.com

Ok, God, I am fucking wheezing, I got trained to work with mice today since I’ll need them for some experiments and the guy who trained me was like, “Yeah ok so if there’s a day where you just absolutely cannot get your mice to cooperate you can always do this” and picks up this cone-shaped bag and just put the mouse face-first into it and shows it to me and I lose my shit because deadass it was a piping-bag of mouse. Like, the whole mouse was pressed into this cone, fur and ears and feet all pressed up against the plastic, tail sticking up absurdly out of the top of the thing. It was so unimaginably fucking funny but like the mouse was perfectly ok with it, there’s a hole for air at the bottom so she could breathe and all but it was genuinely the most absurd thing I have witnessed in months

This is the best post!

Depictions of autistic characters in media almost always fall into the "insanely rude but somehow tolerated" -type, or more rarely into the "innocently pure sweet cinnamon roll who's oblivious about everything uwu"-cathegory, but I think it would be great to have a character somewhere who is very clearly on the spectrum, and also this dude fucks. Like, a lot. You start out assuming that this guy's remarks about how much he regularly gets laid are some sort of a self-deprecating, sarcastic joke, but as the story goes on and you get to know the characters better, it becomes evident that not only are women drawn to him everywhere he goes, clearly the ladies also keep coming back for seconds.

And when someone wonders how in the fuck does he do that when he literally can't look people in the eyes he just goes "they are enthralled by my pure animal energy and unfathomble autism" and isn't joking. And when asked why nobody else has managed to replicate that he just goes "skill issue." And throws out the note that a woman just handed to him - with her number clearly written on it - right in front of her because talking to two people at once is overwhelming and he is not in the mood for that now.

Pain?

You mean spicy daytime?

Source ~ Neuroclastic

[Image IDs: Ten slides from Neuroclastic. All descriptions from Neuroclastic.

All images have a black background with candy-colored rainbow text and graphics

Slide 1: image features a rainbow silhouette with a brain full of talk bubbles that have insults in them. Insults include crybaby, sensitive, freak, weirdo, suck up, snowflake, idiot, stupid, loser, boring, try hard, histrionic, gross, etc.

From the silhouette is a talk bubble that reads, "This is not my voice"

Image is titled, "On Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, Codependency, & Identity"

Slide 2: Titled "Stages of losing contact with the core self"

There is a 5-point zig zag graph with the following stages

Early Relational trauma: Needs are ignored, punished, or shamed. Authentic expression feels pointless or even dangerous.

Rejections accumulate: As authentic attempts to meet needs fail, the rejections begin to wall off access to core self Masks form: Person survives by experimenting with various masks as reactions to volatile or unresponsive people. Core self is further distanced: Masks shield Core Self from abuse, scorn, & neglect, but the person becomes a mirror of others

Codependency: Only the reactive masks have access to others, so a person's existence is defined by the behavior, moods, & acceptance of others.

Slide 3: Titled "Formation of Identity Masks"

An animated character with rainbow coloured hair peeks over a brick wall, each brick containing different words and symbols, while some bricks remain empty. Text above the character reads: "Identity masks are worn to shape the behavior of others. Even if an identity is true to the Core Self, masks make a person seem more or less:

[Words and symbols in bricks]

Popular, amused emojil, fun, smart, heart eyes emoji, educated, disabled, oppressed, dedicated, social, sad emoji, neuroclastic, angry, magical, religious, fashionable, heart icon, normal, stable, mature, political, angry symbol, responsible, smirking emoji, rich, independent, sad emoji, fit, brave, seductive, masculine, heartbreak icon, qualified, vulnerable, skilled.

Slide 4: Titled "Disconnection from our Core Self"

Text below reads: Eventually, we lose contact with our Core Self so that no identity feels real. Identities become more like outfits to put on & wear in different settings the same way we change clothes.

Different bubbles each read:

We mask as someone new in every situation & context

Who we are in the moment depends on the moods & behaviors of people around us

We do not realize that others are not also wearing identities as clothing

We have learned that boundaries get us in trouble, so we don't set them

We are then shocked & feel rejected when others set boundaries

We think people who know themselves are performing and boundaries are rude

Slide 5: Titled "Identities as masks are Identity Cages"

A circle has various bullets emanating from it, each occupying its own oval.

Text within circle reads: RSD is a disconnect from your Core

Self & identity

Bullets are numbered below:

We think our masks are identities, so rejection of masks feels like loss of self

We shop for & borrow other people's identities like they are others flattering clothes

We have perfectionism & are hypercritical of ourselves & others

Because masks are fragile like clothing, mistakes feel like a torn or ruined self

Relationships feel fleeting & fall into toxic patterns of codependency

Slide 6: Titled "Markers of Codependency"

Different shapes with similarly shaped wiggly lines arranged in a 2x3 arrangement, outline different markers of codependency, as follows:

Obsessive about others' and & own behavior Sees, own & others' worth as conditional

Tries hard to be needed & to fix others because love feels like a reward for good behavior

Falls in love quickly, but also can immediately hate someone others to feel worthy

Feels empathetic because identity masks rely on others' emotions for minor offenses

Needs a lot of reassurance, attention, & validation from others to feel worthy

Slide 7: Titled "relationships and Codependency"

4 rectangles, each with different representative graphics and unique titles, leading to the one after them.

The first is titled "Dangerous Relationships" with a one character confidently speaking to/advising a seemingly downcast character.

Text reads: Often exploited by people who see them as an easy target because they are afraid to set boundaries or say "no"

The second is titled "Martyrdom and Resentment" with an uncertain looking character holding an unbalanced balance scale.

Text reads: Taking a passive role of servitude & giving too much, then feeling like a martyr when others do not reciprocate

The third is titled "Other-directed life" with a signpost, one sign reading @NeuroClastic while the other remains blank.

Text reads: Goals, feelings, & desires are responses to others & not reflections of own identity or needs

The fourth is titled "Chaos & Drama" with one character with their finger up, walking away from a confused looking character.

Text reads: Criticizes & blames self or others for minor problems, harshly judges self & others, & manipulates to make self the victim

Slide 8: Titled "Reconnecting To The Core Self"

A circle is divided in quadrants, each describing ways to reconnect with one's Core Self.

The first quadrant is titled: Locating the Core Self The Core Self is not lost, just disconnected. It is the internal voice asking, "Who am I?" and the source of grief beneath the masks. Try to focus on that voice and connecting with your Core Self..

The second quadrant is titled: Dropping the Masks Identity is the whole tree - the roots, trunk, leaves, and fruit. Masks are the parasitic vines of unhealthy relationships and trauma. Begin to remove the vines one at a time when it's safe to do so.

The third quadrant is titled: Losing Value Judgements Dissociating from the Core Self means a person sees the behavior as identity, then strives to be perfect and push others to never make mistakes. You are not your behavior.

The fourth quadrant is titled: Learn to Set Boundaries Boundaries are more effective than masks at protecting the Core Self and prevent you from focusing externally to depend on others to meet your needs and maintain your autonomy.

Slide 9: Various stone shapes containing text are linked by a curving line. The topmost stone reads: Claiming Your Identity

Other stones follow, respectively reading:

No one tells you who you are. You tell them who you are. Who you are does not depend on others.

Know that you do not have to accept harm for the comfort of others.

Ask yourself, "Am I doing this because I want to do it, or because I am afraid of rejection?"

Take small risks, gradually, that allow you to be who you are & build the courage to be disliked.

Work on discovering your Core Self without an audience until you know what you love & who you are.

Slide 10: A comparison between Co-dependence and Interdependence.

The co-dependence pointers remain on a black background, whereas the inter-dependence pointers are enclosed in pencil shaped boxes, which in turn are placed against a rainbow coloured background.

The co-dependence pointers read:

I never develop my own passions or refine my skills because I am living for others

I am jealous & resentful of other people's joy, success, & material possessions

I do not make decisions without people-pleasing & say "yes" when I want to say "no"

I cannot make mistakes because other people will reject, hurt, & abandon me

I become like the people around me & agree with them to fit in & avoid conflict

I manage relationships by controlling or submitting, giving too much or taking too much

The inter-dependence pointers read:

I take the time I need to discover my passions & develop my skills to be fulfilling to me

I do not need to win or be cenetred in order to find value in experiences

I set boundaries & decline to participate if something feels wrong to me

Mistakes are a healthy part of growth & an opportunity to learn & evolve

I do not lose my values or reduce myself to be accepted & don't need others to approve

I give & receive in mutual ways that benefit both me & the people in my life

End ID]

Further Reading from Neuroclastic:

NeuroClastic

On Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, Codependency, & Identity: How to get out from behind the masks

Being forced to mask as a matter of existence pushes people into codependency and rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) and causes them a life

Look at em