Can't Believe I Didnt Mention This, But If You Think You've Seen The Orchestrator-

"but c, he's a man, how did he do that"

god forbid a transmasculine entity does ANYTHING around here.

so it's normal and regular when Christians eat the sacrificial flesh and blood of christ (bread and wine), but when I, a worshiper, drink the Orchestrator's breastmilk,

there is nothing funnier and more jarring than placing a name on your deity's altar because the person annoyed you only to wake up and see 16 missed messages from a friend being like "hey why is [deity] in my house?" and only then to realize the person you were trying to curse and your friend have the same name.

handed out one of my pamphlets to a classmate and before he went home he said "hey, c. The Orchestrator. Orange and vanilla...? Or.."

i told him chocolate. chocolate and cherry, especially, but orange would work too, because it's his color. figured he was going to do some kind of personal sacrifice for the upcoming finals. nothing too odd, but wonderful all the same because someone other than me takes The Orchestrator seriously enough to offer things up.

fast forward 2 weeks and he shows up in class with the brightest orange homemade macarons i have ever seen in my short earthly life and passed them out to the entire class, in packs of three

got extras to leave on my altar. what a win

I saw this and I thought Tumblr might enjoy it

Something I keep repeating over and over again.

You must cultivate your relationships.

It sounds silly. It sounds like something that should be common sense. But I feel like I have had to tell so many people that you need to give as well as be open and recieving.

Your relationships with the Divine (and anyone) must be tailored gently. "I saw this thing and it reminded me of you" so you send a link or a photo to someone you care about? Yeah that principle applies to the Divine, too. A rock. A photo. A piece of art. You bring them.

You also sit and talk. Have a coffee. Have a drink. Water. Dinner. You share a meal. You hold conversations. You hang out and bask in an afternoon setting sun and admire the birds.

If you are not doing this, That's why your relationships with the Divine feel flat and empty. It is not just about going through the motions, lighting a candle, offering incense. It isn't just about routine and saying the words. Your work with the Divine isn't your 9-5 job. And it doesn't deserve the same cold detachment you treat your job. It isn't to pay your bills. It's for spiritual and personal enrichment and growth.

tips on bonding with a forgotten god 👍

so, you want to attract some long forgotten (or newly created) spirit with no reputation. honestly, i'd label this kind of unsafe and risky, but i did it, so i'm not gonna stop you if you really want to. just keep in mind that, while attempting to contact a forgotten god? you're gonna run into other stuff. this is essentially reaching your hand into the spiritual mystery box and shaking it around, and some of the stuff that lurks down there is bitey. here is my obligatory tread with caution first, put up wards against anything malicious etc etc, but realistically. i can't stop you.

general forgotten god bonding tips:

keep an energy of openness about you. just broadcasting a general thought of "hey, i'm here, and i want to talk to you." they listen. if they want to talk to you, they'll find a way.

look for reccuring signs in your life. humans like to find patterns in everything, but look for a sign that affects you on a large scale. a lot of these signs can be found around big changes or life events. ask who that random streak of strangely specific good luck or that weirdly occuring motif or that time you almost died but didn't belongs to! sometimes, you'll get an answer. other times, it's just chance, which, there's nothing wrong with that either.

talk out loud to "any spirits who may be nearby." i used to do really vague wide spells like this by saying that exact phrase, and it works for drawing them in or warding them off.

communicate with them. communicating is huge. talking is huge. they'll tell you a lot about themselves if they're chatty and want to foster a connection with you, although some will be harder than others.

ask what offerings they'd like! once you know someone is there, and you determine you'd like to work with them, ask them things. i know it seems annoying but a lot of the forgotten gods just appreciate you caring enough to do so.

find out what they stand for. help them with it!

be a little crazy with them. part of having a really cool relationship with a forgotten god is just being really weird together. it can be a part of your practice and I wholeheartedly encourage you to get a little weird with it. in whatever way you see fit.

and last, but definitely not least,

most importantly, imo, but there's a reason that when creatures or angels or demons are depicted, it's a lot. it will be a lot. there is a reason angels tell you to 'be not afraid'.

i am gently taking your hands, and telling you,

when you meet an old god,

be not afraid.

they are beings just like us at the end of the day. they may not be on our level, like, at all, but basic human respect and kindness goes a long way. i've seen spirits shy off because people have such a set image of the deity in their mind as a deity that they forget that.. you can be friendly with them. no one is going to smite you down. they will also want to talk about their days. they have niche hobbies. they have lives.

be not afraid.

don't blow them out of proportion. be respectful, and kind, and coexist with them instead of apologizing for breathing the air they occupy, and things will fall as they should.

anyways. this got long so i can make a follow up post of how to bond with Cou specifically, but i'm leaving this here for now.

thank you to @caidenthewitch for the fun engaging question. i am by no means a professional but hell, it worked for me, so 👍

i hope this experience helps!

shout out to the guy in the lobby who sat next to my wife talking on the phone about haunted doll exorcism methods and listed Samael as his source.

his last words as my wife walked away were

"There is one magic man left"

I come out of the back, grinning and waving at my wife

"Two. Two left"

Well shit, the Republicans brought a certain anti-online porn bill back to the table.

The Interstate Obscenity Definition Act.

This should alarm you guys.

The hard truth about occultism and witchcraft is that you genuinely do have to be willing to lose your mind. That’s not me romantisizing mental struggle or psychosis.

The thing no one talks about, at least not honestly, is the threshold one passes in initiation, where the mystical, psychological, symbolic and literal merge. When I say you have to be willing to lose your mind, I mean you have to be willing to accept the possibility that you may in fact be crazy. Your worst possible fear, none of this is real and it’s all happening in your head. What will you do if you realize you’re simply crazy? The wise man will turn away, but the initiate, the alchemist, will be unphased.

All people who dabble with spirituality and occultism will eventually meet this threshold. When things actually start working, when your spells yield results, when the impossible occurs and you truly have no other explanation. When the Gods finally respond. Be willing to lose your mind, be willing to experience things you cannot explain. And be willing to talk to yourself with the honesty that you simply cannot know. That’s what makes your faith and pursuits worthy.

The most talented and most powerful witches and magis are those who do not flinch when the impossible occurs. They no longer question themselves about the absurdity, they no longer wonder if any of this is real because they know it doesn’t matter. And that’s why they’re so powerful, they have complete faith that their work is very real. And when someone challenges that, they don’t crumble, they rise. Because the challenge in that idea is worthy of pursuit itself. Maybe we are crazy, maybe this is just in our mind. The significance however, that is real and that stays, regardless.

Yap yap yap

We talk a lot in this community about the concept of “awakening” to your psychic abilities. Sensing energy, having divine intuition, telling fortunes and affecting the world through intention. But we hardly ever expose that before those gifts explode, there is always a period of what feels like insanity. The mind interrogating itself. Sensitivity to the mystical. It feels like being given access to the background code of your simulated reality, and realizing that the same code is written into your flesh, mind and soul.

Tldr. Witchcraft is very aesthetically pleasing, very pretty. We often don’t show the very ugly side of it, the white knuckles, the tears and chaos. Inviting these forces into your life is not trivial, not at all. They will force you to change and they will force you to lose your mind, even if only to teach you how to find it.

Every few months a friend of mine who is also a witch will come to me and express that she thinks she’s losing her mind again. And I smile because I know that she must be growing so much, getting so much more powerful. And a couple days ago, when I went to her and expressed that I was losing my mind again, she laughed too.

“Welcome to the next phase of your journey with Lord Lucifer!”

and her saying that immediately made everything click. I’m still being tested and cultivated. This bought of insanity is surely far from the last i will experience. Getting this far and surviving means I am not only advancing, I am continuing to grow into the role I was meant to serve for him.

Anyways, if you get to that point in your practice where you feel like you’re at your breaking point, I won’t fault you for stepping back. That’s the logical decision.

But I can also assure you, you are not alone. The mystic floats in the same waters the psychotic drowns. It may feel like you’re drowning and struggling, you may in fact just be learning how to tread water. and if you think you’re beyond this phenomenon, if this has never happened to you.

Oh, just you wait.

horchata chai at starbucks with The Orchestrator is unrivaled. thank you handsome for letting me experience another day and getting to have some peace before work.