Now I'm Being Distracted By Thoughts Of Renner's Sweet Round Baby Cheeks. (I Wanna Pinch 'em!.........

Oh for fuck’s sake....

Why is every sci-fi game I play always end with having to sacrifice yourself, or everything was pointless and humanity as whole gets fucked over or be forced to watch as the main character fucks over humanity because they’re being duped or just because they can’t think rationally for 1 minute and realise they’re being total idiots.

Okay, as technology improves, things get easier- but why is it that the biggest morons always end up in space, deciding the fate of all life on Earth?!

And now for the actual reason I logged in...

My email got hacked. Now sorting through over 8,000 mail delivery system responses to the crap that got sent out via my hacked account. Looks like it was mainly “Singles in your area” posts going out and maybe some free movie or whatever spam. Did have one good response- a definitely manual unsubscribe post, in caps, very angry. I would have responded manually about the hacked account, but I decided not to, just out of security fears. So Andrew H, sorry I got my email hacked (and I hope he gets a better spam filter). Anyway, ran all existing scans, updated, restarted, ran the scans again, added a new malware scanner, ran that. Ran the other scanners again, then talked to what I call “in-house tech support” and had my password changed. Hopefully that ends my other laptop’s career as a bot-net member.

Okay, let’s post something.

The Longest Journey. The first game I stopped playing because I couldn’t stand the main character.

Obtuse puzzles, slow movement speed, pointless areas that only serve to extend the playtime. Please, I’ve played King’s Quest III before Australia had the internet and the benefit of internet walkthroughs. I can handle clunky. What I can’t handle is playing a character with nothing resembling coherent thought.

So the game opens in a strange fantasy setting, cliffs, a talking tree, then a dragon. Then the main character wakes up. She’s an art student, but she has no inspiration. .... Bitch, you just had an apparently recurring dream  set in a fantasy land with a sweeping vista- PAINT THAT, a big head acting as the spirit of a tree PAINT THAT, and a freaking *dragon* PAINT THAT.

Okay, we’re in her bedroom in a boarding house. Small, cramped, but there is a view of a canal out the window PAINT THAT. We get dressed and head out- a somewhat run-down area that used to be a manufacturing area, all canals and strange collections of pipes PAINT THAT, the small cafe where she works PAINT THAT, with a mysterious door nearby that she wonders what’s behind it, SPECULATE SOMETHING AND PAINT THAT, and another odd collection of pipes with an unknown purpose behind them PAINT THAT.

Oh, gotta get that ring she lost back so she can use it to fix some mysterious machine outside the building. PAINT THAT. Eh, fuck it, can’t figure it out right now.

But really, we need to head to the art school and work on her painting, there’s an exhibition coming up that she has to submit a painting to, and she’s barely painted anything. Let’s go past the subway entrance with a guy sleeping on a bench PAINT THAT, through the park PAINT THAT with a large bridge arching overhead PAINT THAT, to the art academy.

There’s a guy inside, painting. She envies him because he seems to knock out a painting every day. (You know why? BECAUSE HE PAINTS!) And work on our painting for the exhibition (not that the player sees it) for ..... well there’s no indication how long, an hour or two at most, before she gives up and any further attempt to have her keep painting has her refusing to work on it because she’s not feeling it or something.

Anyway, let’s talk to the possibly homeless guy that just sits around on the bench outside her boarding house. He seems to know something about her dreams. The dreams of a fantasy otherland that she could paint, but doesn’t because.... apparently unless a fucking angel descends in a light show, says it’s her muse and decrees “here is what you shall paint” it doesn’t count as inspiration.

Anyway, enough of that, it’s a choice of an evening in watching tv, or heading out to the cafe with a friend. Either way, part of the fantasy world will cross over into the real world, that everyone can see, but that doesn’t count as inspiration either.

Anyway, the next day homeless guy is gone, but he’s left a message that she should meet him. Where? Well he only left a cryptic clue, not a location, so you know what, fuck him. That exhibition is coming up soon, and she needs to finish her painting. Oh wait no, I’ve gotten her to the canvas but she refuses to touch it, she’s just not feeling it.

Hey, you know that guy you envy, that produces a painting every day? You know how he manages it? BECAUSE HE FUCKING PAINTS. He doesn’t wait for a mystical muse, he picks something to paint and paints. But instead, let’s run all around town trying to figure out where homeless guy is. After all, he vaguely hinted he knows something about her dream, and really needs to talk to her, but can’t do it on the bench right outside her boarding house where he spends most of his time, it has to be at ..... well she doesn’t know where, but the message she got was that he wanted to talk to her and a cryptic clue to his location. Just tell her to meet him somewhere, or tell the person he’s left the message with where you should go. Oh, message guy? Don’t bother tracking down the person and giving them the message. Don’t even mention me when you see her. Wait until she brings me up in conversation, *then* pass along my vague “I need to talk to you.”

So, as you can see- it’s worth running around questioning everyone she knows to try and figure out where he is. After all it’s not like she has anything better to do. Like, say, finish a painting for an exhibition she’s signed up for. After all, it’s not like she’s an art student that left her small hometown to move to the city just to attend this art school. ...oh wait.

But anyway, let’s run around searching for clues. Ah, got one. He *might* be at an art exhibition of children’s paintings. Oh, we need to take the subway to get there and she has no money. Sure you don’t want to work on your painting? You did move out here to pursue your dreams of becoming an artist, and you need to work on your skills, finish a painting for that exhibition, it is your future we’re talking about here.

No? “Not feeling it” still, okay, let’s talk chase up the owner of the cafe you work at for your wages so you can buy a subway pass and go gallivanting across the city to find some homeless guy that “needs to talk to you” and you have to meet somewhere, but he can’t be bothered to tell you just where.

Okay, got some money. Oh wait, there’s a big key lying on the electrified rails. Fucking *want*! Gotta run around and find stuff to allow us to grab it, which for some reason involves fixing the whatever the hell it is outside the boarding house. Something to do with hot water? You don’t know. Sure you don’t want to work on your painting? Of course you don’t

Okay, key gotten, time for a ride on the subway. We finally find homeless jackoff at an art exhibition, lucky we scored a free ticket, or we would have had to spend even more cash just to talk to this guy.

“I need to to talk to you starving art student. It’s *super* important, here’s a vague clue to where I’ll be, no I won’t just tell you where- this is *important* ...and bring cash, because it’s 20 bucks to talk to me.” Asshole.

Anyway, we’ve found jackoff, and he rambles some vague metaphorical bullshit at us. He’ll tell us more, but tomorrow.

The next day. Ok, instead of the life of an art student, it’s time to hunt down a cryptic homeless guy. The fate of the world just may depend upon it ...possibly, *somehow*, but the fate of the world isn’t important enough that he’ll tell you where to meet him.

Oh no, the only one that might know where homeless jackoff might be, is the slimy guy you hate that also lives in the boarding house. And he’s not going to tell you shit unless you agree to go on a date with him.

So, agree to go on a date with this slime that wants to get into your pants, so you can learn the location of a homeless guy that really wants to talk to you, but can’t be bothered to let you know where he is. Sure, you’re an art student with a painting to finish, but this guy who keeps spouting bullshit at you just *might* know something about a recoccurring dream you’ve been having. That’s worth selling your body for instead of working towards the career you’ve been working towards, right?

Okay, across the city to talk to the cryptic jackoff. He’s in a cinema in the city. The cinema.... is closed. And there’s an employee out front telling you it’s closed, and a cop standing around watching the area.

Can I go back to the start here? Let’s see, I’m controlling the main character. She’s an art student, that complains she has no inspiration despite the fantastical dreams she keeps having every night, and the city around her, filled with mysterious relics of the area’s manufacturing past.

She left her small hometown to come to the city just to attend this art school, because she wants to be an artist. But she’ll do anything to avoid painting. She envies the student that can produce a new painting every single day, but she’s not going to say, talk to him to get advice, or follow his example and keep working on her painting. Yeah, she *needs* to finish just this one, for an upcoming exhibition. But she’s just not “feeling it”.

Instead, oh this possibly homeless stranger she strikes up a conversation with somehow knows about her dreams. Sure it’s creepy that he knows about them, won’t say how he knows and keeps spouting mysterious bullshit, and keeps leaving messages with your friends that he really needs to talk to you, then disappears off who knows where, despite previously doing nothing but sit around on the one bench *right outside the place you live*, but you’ve got nothing better to do instead of chasing him down.

Now, what would *you* do in this situation? Work towards the career you’ve always wanted, or run around a city, talking to everyone you know to find the location of some creep that knows about your *dreams*, picking up a ton of random crap along the way, to fix things you’re not qualified to fix just so you can get to the *possible* location of the aforementioned creep, who leaves messages with your friends about he needs you to meet him in a place, but he’s not going to tell you where, so he can babble mysterious bullshit at you.

Now a real life person that wants to become an artist so much that they left home to attend an art academy, would push through a creative block. Because the only way to improve your skills is to practice those skills, and if they had a lack of ideas would talk to friends or a teacher for help. And if they had a single creative bone in their body, could easily see that dreams are inspiration, and that mysterious objects can serve as a jumping off point for creativity.

Also if someone knows just what you’ve been dreaming about without any reasonable way of knowing so, you’d find that creepy. And if they then kept disappearing when before they were known for consistently hanging around the same place, whilst telling your friends that they really need to talk to you- but never say *where* beyond a cryptic hint, would you run around trying to figure out where the homeless guy wandered off to, instead of working on that painting for the important exhibition with the rapidly approaching due date?

NO. You’d work on your artwork and avoid the unwashed creep that knows far too much about what goes on in your head at night.

But game protagonist, April Ryan. She’ll run around looking for clues to talk to creepy strangers, she’ll collect random crap and fool around with mysterious devices and electrified subway rails. She’ll work through long conversation trees with anyone who’s willing to talk to her. She’ll waste her money on a subway pass so she trek across the city to find a guy who won’t tell her where he is. She’ll poison a cop, and vandalize city property, all to distract a guy that’s stopping her from entering a CLOSED CINEMA that she *thinks* homeless guy is in.

She doesn’t know for sure, but a guy she knows said the asshole she hates might know, and the asshole said he’ll tell her, but only if she goes out on a date with him. Not that there’s any reason to trust this jerk that obviously only wants in her pants, or the homeless creep that she’s trying to find. But what else is an aspiring painter going to do? Paint? Nah.

So talking to the cinema employee, maybe we can ask him if homeless jackoff is inside? Oh, no she’s not going to do that. The slimy asshole that wants in her pants said jackoff is inside and that’s good enough for her! This employee guy is pretty dumb, so if we tell him we’re here to meet jackoff who’s waiting for us inside, he’d probably let us in, or at least confirm if jackoff is here or not.

No? Not going to do that either? Well how do we get in this place? Wait for tonight when it opens? Oh no, this is far too important to wait. Hmm, dumbass keeps fiddling with the sign, looks like some dodgy wiring. Oh hey, there’s an electrical box that’s obviously city property, if we break that, that might just distract dumbass over here. Or it might be for the streetlight or some traffic lights close by, but who’s got time to think about that?

No our main problem now is, there’s a cop hanging around, watching everything. We start breaking the law in front of him, we’re getting hauled off. What to do? Hmm, there’s a disgusting leaking trashcan here and oh! We have a piece of candy in our pocket. Let’s move the trashcan, dip the candy in the filth and then give the candy to the cop!

And tada! We have successfully poisoned the cop! Oh spitting out that crap you gave him made dumbass loose his shit at the cop. The cop’s left to go be sick, maybe go to the hospital. Sure that’s a criminal act, but hey, there’s a *chance* that this homeless jackoff we want to talk to may be inside, and you can’t vandalize city property in order to distract someone long enough to sneak into a closed cinema if the fuzz is watching. This is all common sense.

Okay, the cop’s gone with dumbass hot on his heels, left his hat too. Score! Okay, enter the cinema? Nope, we need to enter from the alleyway, and the gate into the alley is locked.

Well we did poison the cop so we could break public property, better get on with that. So, subway key opens up the electrical box, and cobbling together some of the random junk we’ve picked up will allow us to fuck with the workings.

And the marquee on the cinema is broken! And hey, here’s dumbass back, looks like you’ve got some work to do buddy! Not that it will fix the problem, but hey, he unlocked the gate when he went to grab is tools. Now we can sneak into the alley while he works on the sign.

Ah! Guy with gun, nope just some trash casting a shadow. How odd. Now into the cinema through the fire door. Shit, it’s locked, and setting of the fire alarm will bring dumbass running.

Hm, time to look at the crap we’re hauling around. Put the cop’s hat on the garbage, and presto, the shadow of a cop brandishing a gun. But we don’t want dumbass to look for more than a second.... Oh we have a toy monkey that shouts threats and demands you dance. Perfect! Now it’s arson time.

We open up a trashcan and start a garbage fire. Homeless jackoff would be proud. The alarm goes off and unlocks the door. Dumbass comes running, but monkey toy is screaming out that you must dance or he’ll cap you, and that stops him from looking at” the man with a gun” to realize it’s just the shadow of piled garbage.

Our criminal career off to a brilliant start, we slip into the cinema, hoping that slimy was telling the truth and jackoff really is in there. Oh hey, he is! Now he can ramble at us about old movies. Important.

Oh we’re going back out into the alley? Lucky break, the fire’s out and dumbass is gone. So what next? ....Homeless jackoff is apparently a magic homeless jackoff, we have a swirly portal here. Jackoff says get going, oh and when you land, hit up his buddy.

Woo! Portal time! Where does it go? What will happen to you April? You’re just a humble art student. Oh wait, you’d rather do anything than paint, uncertain death away!

Ulp, portal travel. Blergh. So, where are you now? A catacomb? Oh wait, a temple, let’s see if the priest there will finally tell us what’s going on. And.... he does not speak english, but we can’t do anything else, so let’s just stand here and listen to what we can’t understand.

Slowly the words become english, oh wait, no we’ve gained the mystical ability to speak the language here because we took the time to listen, also it’s because April is “special”. Well depending on your definition, that’s true, but the game’s not working off the same one I’m using.

So, where the fuck are we? Priest guy is the something of whatever, and tells us we are in another world, one that doesn’t work off science and logic, but magic! Well April doesn’t work off logic either, so being trapped in a different world with no money, food, place to stay, livelihood or knowledge of how *anything* here works? Not a problem.

Still, this place is completely unfamiliar, so an explanation from someone who understands just how out of her depth would be good. Can the priest direct us to jackoff’s buddy? Nope, no idea where the dude lives, and he’s not known by name around here, just as the Rolling Man.

Okay, off into the city! Let’s wander around the market. Oh, a map maker- does he know where the Rolling Man is? Yes, but he’s not going to tell you. Fuck. His delivery boy just quit though, so maybe if you work for him you can break into his files later on. It’s low pay.... but you have zero money in this world, so the only way is up.

Okay, deliver a map to a sailor, and get his signature to confirm delivery. Simple enough, let’s find the docks. Huh, word is ship travel’s stalled in this port town because a wizard’s been fucking with the wind. How whimsical. Anyway, we got a boat to find.

Okay sailor man, here’s your map. That’ll be one coin for the delivery and sign here, or my boss will fire me. What do you mean you won’t sign?! Conversation time, oh, he can’t write. Just put anything, an ‘x’ will do. Nope, apparently writing is bad juju. But without a signature you’re out a job and the the only chance to find rolling buddy.

You want music, then you’ll sign? Great, oh and April can’t just sing, gotta get an instrument. Well time to see what’s available for the one coin she’s got. Anything? A cheap flute, whatever. So, broke once more, it’s time to play a song for the sailor. Can April even play music? She’s a painter. Whatever.

Music played, money gone, form signed, back to map maker to get the next job. Well, what do you know? It’s a map for rolling buddy, and now as the delivery drone, we’re allowed to know the directions to his place. ..... say what? Can you write that down... oh it appears on the map screen. Good, ‘cause those directions were long and not that clear.

Okay, rolling buddy, here’s your map, and btw, homeless jackoff said you’ll know how to get April back to her world. Time for a chat and a drink.... what do you mean you don’t fucking know?! Oh but here’s a watch. Yay. It’s broken. Of course.

Random junk time, and the watch is fixed. Oh, magic watch, but not really. An aid to access the world transitioning power within. Anyway a way to get home, let’s go. Wibbly wobbly away!

And back with jackoff. So just what was that all about you homeless fuck? A conspiracy, world in danger, blah blah blah. Now April has a choice, hang with her best friend for the evening or go on that date with slimy. According to the walkthrough, he’s going to be an asshole either way.

Anyway next day. Now I could keep playing, a world of science, one of magic, some big conspiracy, the fate of both worlds in danger. But the thing is, I’d have to keep controlling April. And while I’ve gone through what’s happened while I was playing, I haven’t even begun to touch on how annoying this bint is.

I mentioned King’s Quest III. Okay, that was annoying and clunky too, plus tons of death screens thrown in to boot. But the main character was so much better. Yes, he knew nothing about the world he was in, but he was kidnapped as a child and had spent all of the life he could remember as a servant for an evil wizard.

What did want? To escape and find a life for himself. As he works towards his freedom, he finds out more about his past, a place to go to, a princess in danger, wrongs to right.

April on the other hand. Her backstory has her set up as an art student, but she never works towards that. She left her small hometown to attend this art school and become an artist? She touches a canvas ONCE. She complains about repeating dreams of a fantasy otherland, then complains about how she has no inspiration.

Everything around her is inspiration. The dreams, the views of the area she lives in, the left over pieces the area’s past. The boy who produces a painting every day, oh how she envies him, but’s not going to talk to him. She’s not going to talk to her friend and fellow art student. She’s not even going to work on her fucking painting in progress. No April’s going to drift around, complaining to herself that she has no muse.

She’s a penniless art student, who is under an obligation to produce a single piece of work for an upcoming exhibition that the school is putting on. This is important to her, or at least it’s supposed to be, because she sure as hell doesn’t act like it is. She’ll drift around, talking to her friends about anything other than her troubles. Hell, she’ll talk to the homeless bum who sits around on his ass all day.

A homeless bum who somehow knows about her dreams and spouts nothing but vague bullshit at her, and that’s enough for her to throw everything out the window to chase after him so he can spout more vague nonsense at her.

He has to talk to her, but makes it near impossible for her to find him to have this talk. And why is she doing all this? Well he said he knew she was having dreams, and apparently that’s the most pressing thing in her life. She isn’t even convinced these dreams are important. She complains about having them instead of getting inspired.

This is not the story of someone who as they chase their dream, learn more about the world and their destiny. This is someone who farts around as she deliberately avoids working towards her dream. Does she have a destiny? It looks like it, but it’s not something she’s been searching for, and neither is it something being thrust upon her. She’s certain of nothing, everything in her life is vague and unfocused. No fighting for something, nor fighting to escape something. Someone she barely knows mentions dreams, and she’s going to comb the city, picking up junk and breaking the law because... she doesn’t feel like doing any painting today.

Adventure games, you have to jump through a lot of hoops, but most games- there’s a reason for it. It furthers the main charcter’s goals, or they’re trying to fight the system as it cracks the whip and forces them to jump. April doesn’t have either. A stranger walks over, holds up a hoop and says “jump through this”.

No reason, no pressure, no consequence. The hoop doesn’t lead to something she desires, and there nothing to stop her from refusing to jump through it. She’s not getting fulfillment out the jumping. Random people walk up to her and tell her to jump through a hoop.

How can I write so much and yet be unable to properly articulate just what it is about this stupid fool I can’t stand? It’s a directionless dumbass complaining about her lack of something she actually has in spades, as she does everything to avoid the reason she’s there in the first place.

Sometimes the randomest stuff just sticks with you.

In this case, a sentence from a stranger making a comment to himself in a supermarket. “Can’t skimp on the dunny paper.”

It was, what, 15, 20? (or more?) years ago. I don’t remember what he looked like, nor the sound of his voice, (or really, anything else about that trip), but once upon a time, on a ski holiday with the family, in Mansfield, in the supermarket while were picking up some groceries, I overhead something apparently so profound that it and the location are etched into my memory.

Argh.

And like a dumbass, I didn’t bookmark http://acetechnologist.tumblr.com and my brain can’t hold information well, so I had to spend a while finding it again. I was in the mood to re-read some of the reactioncaps, only to find I didn’t have it in my bookmarks. I like the reactioncaps, it actually got me motivated enough to finally watch through Kuuga- allthough it was something of an adventure finding the fansubs for it. Still, I’m glad it got me to finally watch it though. -Although ‘Odagiri effect’? Shouldn’t that be ‘Katsurayama effect’? Ichijo is where the real hotness is at. <3 As for lately, finally took a look at some Agito. Got through 12 episodes so far. Was thinking of looking at the reactioncaps for it to help put me in the mood to tackle some more eps, only to find out, no bookmark.

That’s the downside of keeping everything open in tabs. Circumstances happen, and everything disappears, and you realize there were a lot of things you should have bookmarked, but didn’t. Anyway, at least I’ll have more context for the fanfics. Yes, I read fanfic for series I haven’t seen yet. Some things, I do backwards. ....and some things I do in such an out-of-order fashion it goes beyond comprehension.

Circumstances.

So, back in…. May. The 17th or 18th thereof. The laptop I was using hit the loading screen singularity. It booted to an error message. I could restart, and get the same error message, or I could try to run recovery, watch it fail, then restart.

So geared up in my informal hazmat-lite disposable attire, I stepped out of the front door of my little Fortress of Crazitude, and went inside the house, where the functional human beings live, to use a laptop there.

Searching for something I liked was going to take a while. In that strange Before Time, when people went outside without being masked, Dad zipped out and kindly got for me the cheapest laptop he could find.

Now I could begin my search in earnest.

Starting with the gaming rigs. Hideous, hideous, awkard design (that was hideous). The closest to what I was looking for was an Alienware model… that was hideous, and came with something called Tobii eye-tracking. I don’t want my computer staring at me. Plus, this was a gimmick, I don’t play the kind of intense shooters where every picosecond counts.

I kept looking.

I found a laptop marketed as a ‘desktop replacement’. Just the sort of thing I wanted. Something with the power of a desktop, but without needing me to do a major cleaning job to find space for it, and/or rig up something to hold a monitor where I wanted it? Perfect.

So I looked around, a place in the US, it had them in stock, and they would even customize it. Great, a bigger hard-drive! Okay the thing needed two power-bricks to work, which would be a hassle, but I could live with that.

In the meantime, the budget laptop could just about run an older version of Minecraft… as long it was on the server my bff’s hurricane child had dragged me onto, I could make do.

I made my order. ……….

3 weeks passed. I heard nothing from them. Okay, the world is in chaos, I expected some delays. Still, I wanted at least some idea for how much longer I would be making ersatz icepacks to keep my new little laptop from overheating from the overworking I was currently giving it, even as I did my best to cut down on my usual habits to lessen strain on it’s CPU.

I sent in a request for an update. “Oh yeah, turns out we didn’t actually have one in stock”. So how long till they could get one? “Oh they’re discontinued. How about one of these?”

All the ‘these’ were ones I’d looked at and already discounted. Wait, here’s one on eBay, how I about I send it to you, and you upgrade that one? I’ll pay the extra shipping fees.

“Oh no, we wouldn’t be able to honor a warranty on that.”

My domain is the black hole of electronics. Once it’s in here, it won’t leave again. My OCD means I cant have something sent out to be repaired and have it sent back. Once it’s here, it’s here. I tried to explain this, and said I would waive any rights to a warranty. It would be the most expensive idiot tax I’d ever paid, but I was willing to pay it.

June passed and I heard nothing.

Time to look again. I had toyed with the idea of a custom rig from another place in the US, but, oh, the price tag. And the wait time. …Mainly the price tag. Okay, major purchase for me, and I was going to crack open my savings. But still, I’m on a pension.

Okay, another look, see if I can find anywhere in Australia. More cash could be spent on the laptop itself and not the insane international shipping tool.

I found a place. Custom configurations, in a shell that isn’t painful to look at.

Could it be?

I checked some reviews. Chunky…. I like a bit of heft to a device. Besides, it wasn’t going to be doing a lot of moving anyway. 1-2 metres on average at best. Fans can get loud…. that means they’re working. I can get a headset if I need it.

Ooh, and they have a sale on too. I consult with in-house tech support. I’m told I can get the hard-drives cheaper elsewhere, and another M2 memory stick, then put them in myself.

Sweet, more cash to spend on the graphics card and CPU. Not quite top-tier, but heck, I hadn’t been running any of my games on the old laptop at full graphics settings anyway. No dvd drive though, but every other maker seems to have dispensed with those as well. Oh well, it’s not like I used those much anyway, and I can always get an external one.

And it only needs the one power brick.!

Better specs than the discontinued model, I can max out on hard-drive space and have a second M2 drive just for my games, with plenty of room!

Before the end of June, I make my order.

I find a big hard-drive, a good sized M2 stick, and even an external usb enclosure for the hard drive I pulled out of the blue-screened purgatory.

July, that place in the US actually mails me back. Since I was willing to waive a warranty, they might be able to source a model off eBay. Ship has sailed, I’ve found me something nicer, and I’ve picked out the extra drives for it.

A few days later, the new place emails me. They’re having delays, but we have a new range out which will be coming in sooner, here are the stats, we can switch you over to one of those?

I forward the stats to tech support. Nope, the hard drive you got in anticipation won’t fit. New place “hmm, that’s true, we’ll do our best to keep you updated”.

They do, and and my order’s been put in priority for assemblage.

As August gets into gear, my new workhorse arrives, and the poor beleaguered budget laptop can retire to light browsing duty.

Only the big hard drive I got? Turns out it’s fat ass can’t fit in the drive bay. Oops. But with the help of tech support, I found an external enclosure that will fit it, so I have a roomy and easy to use backup device.

And then I stripped the head on the screw holding in the M2 memory. And the other slot, that requires a lot more work to get to. But I’m already wiped from the ordeal, the files on the now external drives run fine, and I still have plenty of room on the drive. I can wait for the sales, and pick up some (carefully dimension-checked) drives then. (This beast will hold 2 standard hard drives!) and get around to putting in the second M2 stick.

And that concludes this chapter of Crazy Shut-in Searches for Their Dream Laptop.

Livejournal, you’re killing me.

So, i can’t log into either of my lj accounts. I get a “password out of date - reset it” message. But it’s been like 5 years since I last used those accounts, we’ve changed ISPs I don’t know how many times since then. To be able to reset the password, I’d have to change the account to my current email address. To change my email address I’d have to log in, which I can’t do unless I reset the password. Oh, and old accounts aren’t deleted after years of inactivity (but their passwords can expire!) just how many accounts are there I wonder, where people have the password, but can’t use it because it’s “out of date”. It’s maddening. .... about the only solution I can see is finding out if we have records of who our ISP was in 2016, hoping they’re still around and signing up for a very short time, just to get an old email address back, so I can reset the passwords, change the email addresses then cancel the account with the ISP. Or, actually get a hold of someone at livejournal, have them see that the email accounts associated with the accounts don’t work anymore, and either let me log in with the “out of date” passwords so I can change the email address, or have them change the email address so I can reset the password. Does anyone even work at Livejournal anymore? For all I know, it’s all been automated, and the only human beings involved are whoever cleans rooms the servers are in. ......yeah, I’m not gonna hold my breath.

I see this combined with the post just before this  :

crystal-caper: “I’m also trying to imagine a rotten vs rivet scenario but nothing is happening all I see is two dudes falling asleep on the ground instead. “

Then Esport and Sportacus come across the two sleeping Robbies, who have slightly cuddled up to each other in their sleep. Sportacus is all "Aww, and they look so content! I'm glad Robbie's got a new friend. I'll have to think of something quiet for everyone to do so they can get some rest."

Esport: Suddenly needs to go to his airship to ... uh, get in a workout so he can beat Sportacus in their next match. Yeah. It's got nothing to do with needing a cold shower and why are you bringing up twin fantasies?! Just because that oddly charming yet annoying do-gooder he's dating is currently curled up with his identical yet naughtier counterpart, does not mean there are are any fantasies going on here! It's about making sure he beats the pants off that sickening, watered-down, goody-two-shoes fake copy of his in their next competiton!

He's going to win big, so big that even that nerd of his will act as impressed he's supposed to be! And the nerd's double! They'll come running up, telling him how amazing he is, two pairs of creamy-pale hands running over his muscles, awestrck by the power they contain and... and...

So yes, two sports elves come across a pair of sleeping Robbies. The elf in blue greets the sight with soft, fond smile. The elf in red stands shock-still for an instant, cheeks slightly reddening before whirling around announcing that he needs to bench press something.

Rivet hands rotten a bottle of melatonin. rotten cries because he can finally fucjign sleep

Finally world peace achieved. Both of them can just nap in peace and temporarily ignore their sports elves. ((Rivet is 100% sure sportacus can handle his hell goblin. ))

My brother's comment on this- "Obame-hame-HA!"

Kougami Foundation Internal Research Report: Long-term metaphysical human side-effects due to long-term bodily possession by a sentient avian-based alchemical construct. Or, How Izumi Shingo became a Disney Princess.

The first clue Ankh's possession had Changed Things was something anybody would miss. The balcony and windows of the Izumi apartment, Shingo’s car, favourite spot to eat lunch, etc. Japan was a clean place and bird droppings are only something you notice when they’re present.

The second clue was odd, but a bird attacking the robber Shingo had been chasing through the park- well it was close to nesting season- the conclusion anyone would come to is that the robber came too close to the bird’s nest. Between the adrenaline of the chase, cuffing the man, and the planning of the paperwork ahead, well, no-one ever thought to wonder why Shingo was exempt form the bird’s attack.

The third clue however, couldn’t be ignored or explained away.

It had been a long day, the latest in a sequence of long days, and it would be a long night as well. Shingo had not only missed lunch, but dinner as well, and wouldn’t be getting a break anytime soon to let him rectify the problem. A situation he lamented about out loud.

He found out that he had been overheard by more than his coworkers when not long after he spoke, a Tokyo raven- those eerily clever, oversized urban corvids- dropped off a bag of senbei, sold by a vending machine only few blocks away.

What if Ankh's title "King of the Birds" actually had some weight to it? With the King dead, the guy the King ended up posessing for a year seems as fitting a candidate for Regent until the King's ressurection right?

Honestly, even for a throw-away one-shot, I'm not that happy with this. Really needs a beta or co-author to punch it up I think.