Soup

bastille is correct. how AM i gonna be an optimist about this?

@moth-fanatic FUZZY PRETTY MOTH!!!!

Red-breasted green tiger moth, Chlorhoda metamelaena, Erebidae

Photographed in Colombia by alefox123

Wish I had a brain 😔

your brain gets head but your smart gets dumb

"You'd look cute in a collar" okay I'm handing you the leash and sitting at your feet waiting for a command

shout out to everyone who participated in the january-february mass depressive episode

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates approriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

if you had a bathtub full of water how many slices of bread would it take to absorb the entire tub. Goodnight!

I will be like "I'm fine" and then another fucking event will occur

I love bugs I love them they're so small and they have so many cool specialized survival niches a ton of them can fly and even more can just casually climb up walls they are tiny little dudes with their own individual powers and abilities and they control through hydraulics which is so. cool plus they are silly and weird and some of them are downright ridiculous and I love them so very much