First Non Hobbit Related Post Because This Is Perfect

lotr but nobody knows anything about the other races

Pippin thinks Legolas is a woman

Boromir is convinced that the hobbits are all 15 max

Everyone thinks that Merry and Pippin are twins, except for Legolas, who is convinced the hobbits are quadruplets

Sam thinks that Aragorn, Boromir and Legolas don't have to eat to survive

Legolas doesn't mention things he sees or hears because he thinks the others have noticed them too and just assumes they have a plan

Pippin complains that he is hungry and Legolas just gives him a handful of grass. Pippin is so confused that he just takes it, and now Legolas tries to figure out what hobbits can eat by just giving them random shit, like

Things the hobbits have accepted and likely eaten later (a list by legolas)

-Grass - Leaves

-Stones - a hair tie

-A feather - one of Gimli's shoes

The hobbits and Gimli just assume that this is what elves eat

Imagine if the reason that it took Bilbo sixty years to be badly effected by the Ring, was because it wasn’t Saurons voice speaking to him. Or the voice of the ring or whatever.

Imagine it was Thorin’s voice.

He spent all that time, not separating himself from it but also not doing anything evil or bad was because he was just grateful to hear Thorin’s voice again, no matter what it said to him, it was his voice.

And when he was separated from it, he was desperate and sad, but he could pull himself back because he knew the ring wasn’t him, he was dead.

Thoughts…

Freak yeah. When I get my fanfics out there… 😁😬

reblog if you’re okay with people writing fanfics of your fanfics and/or fanfics inspired by your fanfics

Saving this for later

Ch. 116 - Bait and Ghost - The Blind Burglar

“Once we have the Arkenstone and an army of my kin, the Master will be in no position to demand anything!” Thorin insisted. “We don’t have to do anything.”

“Woah. Wait. What?” Bard stopped them. “Army? What are you–” His eyes widened. “Oh, Eru. No. What the hell are you planning? I thought you were headed to the Iron Hills?!”

The Elve shared a look, and Balin shook his head.

“You’re going to the mountain.” Bard understood even without anyone saying anything. “I can’t believe I’m helping you. You’re going to bring the wrath of the dragon down on all of us!”

“Stop being melodramatic, Bard,” Bilbo said. “It’s not cute in a grown man.”

“Oh, pardon me. I suppose I should be grateful you want to stir up the embodiment of death!”

“We’re not going to let the dragon come to Laketown.”

“How are you supposed to stop a bloody dragon?!”

Shrugging, Bilbo said, “We’ll figure something out.”

~~Coming May 5th.

https://archiveofourown.org/users/DomesticGoddess/works

unless they specifically asked, you don’t get to tell a fanfic writer you think they mischaracterized the character by the way. because the second someone writes a fanfic about a character, that character becomes the writer’s own version of the character. canon is only a suggestion, but whether or not an author will follow it / how much of canon an author will take is entirely up to them. you don’t get to stick your nose in their world and tell them “hey this is not to my liking therefore I think you’re doing it wrong” when you can simply leave quietly and move on to something else you may enjoy

Imagine if Dori and Nori were both dwarrowdames the whole time and they were just there to look after their shit ass nerd little brother.

BAHAHAH I LOVE THIS

They heard a noise in the middle of the night

I love the hc that dwarves who cut their hair are either shamed or in mourning but cutting your hair is a huge part of self expression!! and I think of dwarven hair as the ultimate form of telling every other dwarf who you are and what you do in life

so I propose that ceratin crafts require cutting your hair in a specific way. you can't confuse it with shame or mourning because everyone knows what that very specific pattern is.

for example! Ori has bangs. bangs are perfect for a scribe! you never have to worry about hair blocking your immediate vision, especially when you are handling old documents where you can't afford to touch anything but the paper in front of you. so you see a dwarf with bangs and immediately know they're a scribe

example 2! Dwalin is half bald and the top of his head is tattooed which sounds pretty painful. what if that's just the hairstyle of warriors? they test your dedication to guarding and protecting and sacrifice by making you shave the top of your head and tattooing it. this also works great as a deterant, like imagine someone thinking to assassinate crown prince Fili but they see Dwalin with his shaved tatted head staring into their soul and they just. slowly back away. you don't fuck with dwarves whose soul craft is being a warrior, especially when they want you to see them coming by announcing to the world that I'm so dedicated to this, I shave the top of my head every day

Very much quite possibly almost maybe completely my favourite dwarf family idk