SAN – The Silence Before I Speak.

Emotional Border Letter - Derya's promise to herself

You don't need to understand anymore.

It's not for you to weigh, measure, question the feelings I'm experiencing.

I opened up to you, I wanted you to hear my voice.

But every time you tried to pull me into your story.

By ignoring my story.

Now I am silent. But this is not a defeat.

This silence is not an escape.

It's a limit.

It's my right to protect myself.

It's my right to choose my inner peace.

This is my determination to stand on my own side from now on.

Keep everything that is rightfully yours.

I will no longer carry burdens that are not mine.

I let go of guilt, obligation, shame.

Because I want to walk only with my essence.

I owe only my own heart.

And now I pay that debt:

I forgive, love and protect myself.

This is my inner farewell letter.

Not to you, but to myself, whom I have silenced in the past.

I exist now.

And that's how I'm okay.

-Derya

I saw a miracle today and it was this. I had already given up hope but after 2 years with only one withered leaf I get my new flower. This means a lot to me because it shows me that you shouldn't give up too quickly and just take care of it and the shoot will give you a new flower.

See what a little care made. When you care about you like you care about this flower you would bloom beautiful too

Derler ki, okyanusa kavuşmadan önce nehir korkudan tir tir titrermiş. Arkasına dönüp bugüne kadar geçtiği onca yola bakmış. Dağların tepesinden, en rüzgarlı vadilerinden, seyahat ettiği tüm köylere ve ormanlara kadar.

Ve karşısındaki okyanus o kadar kocaman, eni sonu belli olmayan, uçsuz bucaksız bir şeymiş ki içinde kaybolmaktan korkuyormuş. Çünkü onun içine dalmak sonsuza kadar yok olmak gibi geliyormuş.

Ama gidilecek başka yol yokmuş, nehir geri dönemezmiş. Kimse geri dönemez akışta. Varoluşta geriye dönmek diye bir şey yoktur. Ve nehir okyanusa akma riskini almaya karar vermiş. Çünkü başka türlü korkusunu yenemeyeceğini anlamış.

O anda görmüş ki, okyanusa karışmak diye bir şey yok. Okyanus olmak var.

~ Halil Cibran

You are free to fly wherever you want

“The bad news is you’re falling through the air, nothing to hang on to, no parachute. The good news is, there’s no ground.”

— Chogyam Trungpa

Bir tatlı kaşık huzur 🌸🌸🌸 (hier: Yeldegirmeni bungalow evleri) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRd_TAiNEa5pRbMHBDWDIgPKe2e3-XjNoRT2ug0/?utm_medium=tumblr

I am bold ❤️

I am confident ❤️

I love myself ❤️

I tell myself that every time

“What if I write it and it’s bad-”

WHAT IF YOU WRITE IT AND ITS GOOD? WHAT IF YOU WRITE IT AND ITS EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANTED? WHAT THEN????