I Hate That Every Game On Steam That Releases In Now Marked "early Access"

i miss when houses had character

now everything is gutted and flipped to look like stale white bread

why take the character out of the house? where's the charm? why did you remove all the love that went into it?

I love how MH:W has been me and my girl crew saving the world. Erik included.

I am having a very rough week mentally and physically. I've also been overeating every day and so that is weighing on me literally and emotionally. My cravings have been terrible, and I haven't gotten myself out and walking like I need to be.

This makes me really upset and depressed. I have to get myself back on track.

I don't understand why we can't have a Monster Hunter where we can just run around in the same environment and hang out. Why we can't just be bros and maybe see one another while we're doing other things. Explain.

I am starting to hate Discord.

It has so many pop ups and so many "features". Discord is over engineering itself. It's no longer a nice simple platform to chat with friends, but instead a constantly moving forum. I hate that I have to join a discord server to get information on something because that's where the information is stored instead of on a forum or just placed on the internet.

It's turning into what everyone hated Skype for. In fact, it's pretty much there.

Another successful walk today. The weather was gorgeous and there were so many people out! I didn't talk to any of them (I complimented one's dress), but it was nice to just be around them. I also saw a naked squirrel (might be a rat, but it was running with a bunch of other squirrels) and how nature can't be stopped from going where it wants to go.

I bought a scale, as well. I am now below 260 lbs and I am so excited! I am slowly getting to a healthy weight and getting away from diabetes. I know it's only been two walks, but I have to stay motivated, so sharing these moments feels good.

Remember, only you can make changes for yourself.

2020! First year of marriage to my beloved @notleriff and me doing the MOST artwork I've ever done. I had a blast this year.

My husband is playing Onimusha Warlords and we just saved a panicked boy from demons - then we give him a life lesson about the world and freedom???

Samanosuke this is not the time to dad on a child you don’t know.

I am waning.

I feel as though I am in that final phase of the moon where it begins to vanish from the sun's light and hides for a few days - as if it's recharging.

Except I'm not recharging.

I'm simply spent. I have no motivation, no sense of hope, no desire to do anything... I just want to lay in bed and not exist. I have not contributed anything to the world these last three weeks and I'm on the edge of simply wallowing. I suppose I already am.

I have met obstacles and simply given up, neither going around them or over them. I simply sit down and accept that I cannot go any further, that I can't do anything better, that I'm not making any progress.

It's in every faucet of life. I've let it leak into my main responsibilities, but it started in my hobbies, my creativity, my self-care and health. I've gone back so many steps on simple things I've been trying so hard to do better with.

Drinking water? I gave up and now I'm dehydrated.

Walking outside? I'll just sit at my computer and scroll endlessly, hoping something catches my attention.

Hobbies? No thanks, I'll just sigh and flick YouTube shorts away over and over again.

I'm unhappy with myself. I don't feel good. I don't look good. My mental health is low. I am at a loss of how to pick myself up. I'm hoping my therapy on Thursday helps.

Thanks for reading.

It is December 26th, 2024 and I have fully filled two journals I've owned since at least 2019. From front to back they are filled with random things that crossed my mind, notes of my interests, and things I never felt safe to share.

I am proud of filling them. Proud they are no longer blank pages. Excited to start in the next.

I have learned so much about myself since I started my journey of self discovery and self love in September. I am such a unique, smart, and thoughtful individual, but I am sure everyone says that about themselves. There's so much I have to learn about myself and so much I want to accomplish. I have to work on how I set and approach goals, but that's a challenge I welcome.

I am starting to slowly understand myself and I am so excited to meet me.