In My Restless Dreams, I See That Town.

Hey millennials...

Now what we aren't going to do is send anyone hate for what fandom they grew up in. We love media that helps us grow and learn. We were children.

In watching a video about photography, as I would like to learn and I'm using my phone to do so, it was mentioned by the host that photographers are often compliment with a statement similar to, "Wow, that's a nice photo! You must have a great camera."

Never, in my life, have I thought about the quality of someone's tool assisting their work. Honestly! It might be because I grew up drawing and later writing and doing digital art, but I never thought to tell anyone, "Wow! Your artwork is gorgeous! You must have a great paintbrush!"

That's so odd, to me. People have been creating art with literal trash and I believe it's all dependent on skill. It's just interesting to learn that people bring up the quality of someone's tool in a compliment.

Artists: Have you been told a similar thing? How did it make you feel? Have you ever told someone else that?

Guys new Cait Sith plush dropped!

I love how MH:W has been me and my girl crew saving the world. Erik included.

Perhaps I am starting too many things at once.

I wish to find my place in my spirituality, but at the same time I wonder if my heritage would offer me anything. I am half Mexican/half Caucasian, but I was raised Caucasian and had little to no contact with my Hispanic family after the age of 3. Because of this... I know nothing about my Mexican bloodline.

I do not know anything about the culture, the beliefs, the celebrations, very little about the food, and I can barely speak Spanish. I want to get in touch with these roots, also. Part of me feels that I am too late, however, and pushes back against it.

How do I even start? Where do I begin? Do I postpone my spiritual journey and focus on my heritage instead? I am overwhelming myself, as I often do, and these past two weeks have been rather awful... it's all compounding and I don't know what to do to get back on my feet.

when you catch yourself sitting at your computer and watching something on your phone because your attention span is so short you didn't even take time to realize you could watch the same video on a bigger screen with better audio.

me: i love songs that are deep, hold meaning, tell a story, create elaborate images in my mind and move my heart while making me consider my own existence.

also me:

I feel very overwhelmed.

While researching and trying to learn, I have discovered there are many paths in paganism that I feel would fit me. But I cannot be all of them at once, can I? I see many people saying "take what fits and work with that!" but I have always been very structure abiding. I want something that is laid out for me plainly and guides me. I need something that is set and allows me to follow a plan.

I feel a bit anxious. I do not want to cause offense, I don't want to do things "wrong", and though the community seems to believe there "is no wrong way", I am not imaginative enough to create by myself.

I am causing myself stress over trying to find peace.

Dear nerds, geeks, and fandoms,

It's my birthday, so would you please show & tell the pets you've named after your favorite character, show, book, or game?

I have two, creatively named by my husband.

Haun, named after Huan the great Wolfhound of Middle Earth. We had to adjust the spelling because people kept calling him Juan... And Rahir, which is a rough Quenya translation of "Lost and Found". Since he was a stray, it was very fitting.

Please enjoy tummies.

My husband is ill and there's nothing more I can do for him, so my mania is taking over. I've done the quiet clean ups and retried making banana nut bread with this recipe. The first time I made it I had a dumb and forgot flour... you know, the main ingredient in bread. I need more hobbies that keep my hands busy because when I run out of chores, my manic episode worsens, and I feel as though I want to crawl out of my skin and scream.

Bipolar really is something.