How Do You (“how Does One”) Shop For A Therapist?

to stay warm, advice from a canadian who deals with -40C weather to the americans in the south

blankets and sheets, get them layers in your bed. wear a loose hoodie to bed and socks too. it helps. put a blanket under you too to keep your back warm

put a rug underneath your bed, it helps with insulating your bed from the cold

drink water, like hot weather n the summer, cold weather will dehydrate you and you will get colder. so to warm up, drink water

get enough sleep. srsly, it will help you deal with cold weather

take a lot of breaks if you are going outside. like stagger how long you are outside and hydrate 

don’t burn propane indoors, or keep your oven open

if you are going to make a fire, do it in a fireplace and make sure your flume is open

share body heat with your pet or family by getting under the covers together. it helps.

hot water bottles, electric heat pads and rice bags are great to warm up the bed. 

close your blinds and use curtains or sheets to cover the windows, it will help with insulating from the cold. especially at night. you can even get some styrofoam from a hardware store or window insulation. my sister’s apartment had terrible windows and she used blackout curtains to keep the heat in

baking! do some baking. it really heats up the house. like make a pound cake, something that takes 60 mins. srsly even in -40C i had to turn off the heat in my apartment because the oven heated the whole place and also, CAKE 

going outside requires: shirt and sweater/hoodie , sometimes an undershirt if you aren’t used to the cold. keep your core covered! a scarf! the heaviest coat, socks! pants! and water proof or insulated boots. double up on socks too! and gloves and a hat. in a pinch a kerchief can make a good headband and combine that with a hood it’s a makeshift hat

give your car time to warm up, the oil needs to be at the midpoint! so start the car and let it run before going somewhere

keep two car lengths between cars, it gives you enough time to break. the road is icy! and you probably don’t have winter tires, road salt or ploughing so give your car time to stop. like srsly, also go slow! put your hazards on too to let other cars see you and if you are going slow 

soup, make some soup

also hot chocolate is also great

stay warm and i love you guys

I wanna tell you guys a story,

Not too long ago, my friend Bella came out as aromantic to me, and now I’ve got some things to say.

I was the one who told her what aromantic means, because I was explaining different sexual orientations to her. I remember saying, “Asexualiy is when you have romantic attraction, but no sexual attraction.”

Bella immedently, without missing a beat, asked, “Is there an opposite to that?”

I asked what she meant, and she asked if there was a term for sexual attraction but no romantic attraction. I told her about aromantics. She got weirdly quiet, then excused herself.

Not two weeks later I was heading to my boat. I was supposed to meet Bella and another one of our muteral friends there for a day of fishing.

As soon as I was in earshot, I saw Bella storming off the boat, and our other friend standing there like an idiot. Boi had no idea what was happening.

Anyway, Bella isn’t looking where she’s going and walks smack dab into me. That’s when I realized she was crying. Puffy red eyes, wet cheeks, the whole nine yards… And if you know anything about Bells, she does not cry. Ever.

She’s been through some serious crap in her life, and she does not cry. She’s tough as nails. Bella has a steel core. She does not not cry. I’ve seen her fall off a roof and break her arm before, not a single tear. I can’t stress this enough, Bella. Doesn’t. Cry.

So seeing her in tears shook me. I took her by the shoulders and escorted her somewhere more private where we could talk. We ended up in the women’s restroom, which was weird as fuck for me, because haven’t been in a woman’s rest room for years. Luckily it was empty, and I’m realistic, I know I don’t pass so well, so I don’t think anyone would have said anything anyway.

Before I can even ask her what’s wrong she hugs me around my middle and burys her face in my hoodie. Then, in a voice I can only describe as traumatized, she says, “I think I’m broken.”

I’ve never seen her in so much pain, and Bella and I are CLOSE. She’s one of my dearest friends. She’s like my little sister, but if she’s like my sister, our other muteral friend is like her twin. He and Bella have know each other WAY longer, they’re practically inseparable. They come as a pair. They’re a duo. They’re a package deal.

Appearently, said muteral friend asked Bella out and forcefully kissed her. She shoved him off, and told him she’s aromantic, which she only recently figured out. She wasn’t ready to be out, but this muteral friend left her no choice. She tried telling him no, and he didn’t listen. Bella saw no other option.

Quote on quote, this is what he said to Bella. “That’s okay. You just haven’t dated me yet. We’ve been like, unofficially together for years. You’re probably just freaked out that it’s finally going somewhere.”

After that I’m not 100% clear on what happened, but apparently Bella kept saying no Nd trying to explain herself, but he kept insisting he could ‘fix her.’

Eventudally she started crying and stormed away. That’s when I found her.

Keep in mind, this was her first experience coming out, and her best, closest friend insisted he could fix her and forcefully kissed her. I found out later he also implied corrective rape would ‘solve the problem.’

Bella was traumatized. She’s still traumatized. I tried to make her feel better by buying her an aro pride shirt, and taking her go a local LGBTQ+ hang out. I wanted her to be around like minded people, so she could see she wasn’t broken, and her identity deserved to be respected.

Instead of a warm, welcoming environment… The first thing someone said to her was, “This place is for REAL lgbt people. You don’t belong here.” He also implied she wasn’t human.

Just think about that for a minute. Her first experiences with being an out aromantic have been limited to;

A person she trusted more than anyone forcing himself upon her, claiming she was ill, and needed to be fixed. (Raped.)

Sobbing in my arms in the women’s restroom because she thought she was broken and defective.

Being told she wasn’t welcomed in LGBTQ+ spaces and called inhuman.

This isn’t what I want for her. Bella deserves better than this. She needs a support system, not all this crap. I’ve spent the past week trying to undo all the damage exclusionists, arophobes, and people she trusted did.

Aromantics and asexuals belong in the LGBTQ+ community. You literally cannot change my mind.

Also Remus Lupin is so bi like you can just go and cue NSYNC’s Bye Bye Bye

Watch: Kristen Bell opens up about the mental health double standard and how she manages her own struggle.

Follow @this-is-life-actually

Hi! Made an incredibly quick and easy to comprehend guide because you freaks need it tbh. Image quality kinda sucks but whatever, you get it. Stop putting yellowface on my dash.

only 5000 signatures left for this petition to reopen tamir rice's case!!! pls sign it only takes a few seconds!!!!

“ummmmm ur bra strap is showing :/ ”

Ugh, ok. I didn’t want to have to say this, but… I keep seeing those cheeky posts going around like “Tee hee, I sure hope no protesters know that-” or “It would be a shame if anyone were to-”

Guys, PLEASE STOP SPREADING THOSE. Those posts are going to get someone hurt.

You should NOT trust unverified advice from strangers on the internet. Honestly, some of the advice I’ve seen is so bad I almost have to wonder if it was created by plants to try to get people hurt. Speaking as someone who’s involved in multiple martial arts, improper self-defense techniques will get you hurt; Speaking as someone who is familiar with plywood, it ain’t going to do shit to block a heavy projectile and WILL fill you with horrible splinters. Unless you know for certain advice is trustworthy, you should be neither listening to nor spreading it.

If you see any attempt at combat or self-defense advice online, you should ask yourself:

Who is posting it?

What are their qualifications?

Where did they get this information?

Is it being explained in a clear, detailed, and easy-to-understand manner?

What are the precautions? How might this go wrong?

If you don’t have good answers to these questions, then it’s bad advice and should not be followed or spread. Sure, maybe some of it might be genuinely good advice- But it might not be, and unless you know for sure, then it’s far better to err on the side of caution than to risk getting hurt.

Be safe, be smart, and always check your sources.

My 4 year old nephew loves to paint his nails. Any time he sees someone wear nail polish he asks if he can have some too. The most difficult part is getting him to decide what color, because he he wants all of them.

Nail polish is for everyone.