Diy Lobotomy

Damien Cray: Hello private assassin of mine, I have an annoying person I’d like to be rid of

Yassen: lol ok no problem boss who is it this time

Damien Cray: This kid called Alex Rider

Yassen: OH NO MY SON

Who's the best homophobic gay character?

real talk, yassen is insane for only sleeping 4 hours every 24 hours. baby that is not enough sleep. i know you're like peak health or whatever but that's only enough sleep to live, not thrive. how are you awake and alert everyday. whats wrong with you.

*STANDING ON A TABLE WITH A MEGAPHONE ENERGY* MY DEAR FRIENDS, comrades in arms, those of us still out here in the year of our lord 2024, I make great apologies. I am late to you with this. HOWEVER this does not diminish the aggression or pressure from this EXTREMELY FRIENDLY REMINDER that Alex Rider, still 14 I guess although questionable, has never handled a gun but once went to space, thrown into situations he is not qualified for and treats them with the contempt they deserve, yacht destroyer, is out here every day hating British institutions and protesting injustice in government and showcasing that sometimes you just need to blow up a billionaire.

It’s 2024, and I know that for some of us the turning of the year is getting increasingly bleak - we have war, conflict, genocide, climate change, the roll back of basic human rights….but I want us all to go into 2024 with the energy of Alex Rider: yes it’s OK to be down about the circumstances not of your agency that you find yourself in, but there’s always a fucking way to blow up a yacht. Stay safe out there.

my bf and I have the same fucking brain

the thing about me is that I will eat an entire avocado and I do not care what you think or if it is your avaocado

“I used to have a crush on another guy who rose from the grave. But Jesus never threw a football like you Max”

googledocs you are getting awfully uppity for something that can’t differentiate between “its” and “it’s” correctly

Been working at haunt for a couple weeks now, and people are weird as shit. Like, why tf are little boys asking actors to shove things up their ass?? Why are fully grown men making feet pics jokes when they see severed legs??

!!THOR LOVE AND THUNDER SPOILERS AHEAD!!

that shit was gay