I've Been Obsessed With John Buckleys "everybody Here Wants You" I'd Love To See Your Take On It Maybe

Headcannons: professor!ellie williams x reader

masterlist

professor ellie masterlist

☆ Ellie knows she’s going to marry you long before she tells you. She buys the ring three months into living together. Keeps it hidden in her desk drawer beside annotated books and letters from you.

☆ She proposes on the floor of your shared office. Not at a dinner, not with a crowd—just soft music, ink-stained fingers, and a whispered: “Be my always. My only. My mind, my muse, my wife.”

☆ The ring is engraved with a quote from your writing. Not hers. Yours. "You make knowledge feel like coming home."

☆ She asks your opinion on “proposals in literature” a week before. You think she’s researching. She’s just trying not to cry at the idea of you saying yes.

☆ When you say yes, she buries her face in your neck and shakes. Not from nerves. From relief. From awe. From the raw ache of being loved back.

☆ She starts referring to you as “my fiancée” constantly. In grocery stores. On campus. During panels. “My fiancée’s theory on this is actually quite relevant…”

☆ She changes your contact name to “Almost My Wife.” With 3 hearts and a lock emoji.

☆ She sleeps with her hand resting over yours every night. On your ring finger. She checks it like it’s her most sacred relic.

☆ She updates her entire academic bio to include you. “Currently lives with her partner, her muse, and greatest intellectual influence.”

☆ She teaches a lecture titled: “The Intersection of Intimacy and Intellectual Devotion” She’s talking about you. The class has no idea.

☆ Ellie wants a tiny wedding—just you, the vows, and a quiet lake. But if you want more, she’ll plan a thousand-guest celebration without blinking. “You say the word and I’ll build the world for you.”

☆ She insists on writing her vows by hand. In her favorite pen. On pages she slips under your pillow the night before.

☆ She practices saying “wife” alone in her car. Wife. Wife. Wife. She can’t stop smiling.

☆ She hides love notes inside the wedding checklist binder. You find one labeled: “Stop reading this and come kiss your future.”

☆ When you choose your dress, she sketches you in it from memory that same night. Adds it to her journal. Dates it. “The day I saw her and forgot how to breathe.”

☆ Her friends throw her a chill night in. But she sneaks off to call you every hour. “I can’t even pretend to want to be anywhere you’re not.”

☆ You write each other letters to read before the ceremony. She cries through hers. Has to reapply mascara. Still keeps the tear-streaked one folded in her breast pocket.

☆ She makes a playlist of songs that remind her of your earliest days. Plays it while getting ready. One track in, she’s sitting down, hand over heart, whispering: “Holy shit. I’m marrying her.”

☆ She starts dreaming of your last name beside hers on academic papers. No hyphen. No division. Just unity.

☆ You give her a watch as a pre-wedding gift. She whispers: “I’ll count every second I get with you.”

☆ When you walk down the aisle, Ellie mouths “mine.” Once. Quiet. Like a prayer.

☆ She cries when you hold her hands. Not one tear. A whole storm. Her lips tremble when you say her name.

☆ Her vows start academic and crumble into desperation. “I thought I understood devotion—until you. You rewrote me. I’m yours now. Completely.”

☆ Her fingers shake when she slips the ring on yours. But her voice never falters: “With this, I give you everything.”

☆ She kisses you like no one is watching. It’s not performative. It’s urgent. She’s been waiting forever.

☆ She refers to you as her wife every chance she gets. Out loud. On paper. In conversation. She beams every time.

☆ She can’t stop touching the ring on your hand. Kisses it. Spins it. Holds it during dinner. “Still feels like a dream.”

☆ She hangs your wedding photo above her desk. Right beside her degrees. “My greatest achievement.”

☆ She uses your wedding date as her new password. She’ll never forget it. She couldn’t.

☆ She journals the first 365 days of your marriage. Every little thing. Every breakfast. Every smile. Every time you say her name like it means everything.

☆ She changes her legal name just to have part of yours. No one expected it. But she wanted it.

☆She introduces herself at lectures as “Dr. Ellie Williams—but more importantly, a wife.” Every time. Her proudest title.

☆ She builds a library with your last name engraved at the entrance. It’s her gift to the university. Her devotion in bricks.

☆ She keeps a framed note that says “You said yes.” Next to the ring box. Beside her bed.

☆ When you fall asleep first, she whispers: “Married you. Won.”

☆ She keeps your wedding vows on her desk at all times. Reads them when she feels lost.

☆ She starts calling you “my forever” in texts. Even to herself. Especially when you're not around.

☆ She wears her ring when she lectures. And if she forgets it? She’ll cancel class. That’s how wrong it feels.

☆ She celebrates every mini-anniversary. First date, first kiss, first “I love you.” “Why wouldn’t we honor our history?”

☆ Her phone background is a photo of your hand in hers. Wedding rings shining. Sunlight catching on your fingers.

☆ She saves every note you leave her, even grocery lists. “Married girl handwriting,” she says with a grin. She signs every card, “your wife, your fool, your scholar.”

☆ When she wins awards, she thanks you before anyone. “For keeping my soul fed while I chase knowledge.”

☆ She keeps your last name on her lips like a spell. Soft. Reverent. Yours.

☆ She reads your vows aloud every year on your anniversary. Her voice always cracks by the second paragraph.

☆ She builds you a bench at the lake where you married. With a plaque that reads: “Where I became hers.”

☆ She keeps your bouquet dried and shadow-boxed in her office. Next to a note: “Every day since has been full bloom.”

☆ She still asks you to dance in the kitchen. Same song. Same rhythm. Same girl.

☆ She rereads the proposal letters every winter. Wears your old hoodie and says: “Still can’t believe.”

☆ And when she’s asked what love is, she says: “It’s when you look at someone and think: If I never wrote again, I’d still have said everything I ever needed—just by choosing her.”

omg sorry if i explote ur inbox, its just- i have so many ideas and love ur writing

queen it's ok!! You can send as many as you'd like😭✋🏼 I love your requests

I love your Professor Ellie series, god... it's beautiful, perfect. Ellie is so soft, fine, so right(? I don't know how to say it, it feels so good to read it, I'm in love with her and your way of writing.

P.S. I'm using a translator, sorry if there's a spelling mistake.

oh my word, thank you sm!! Messages like these mean the world to me, and this motives me sm!!I love you and i appreciate it!!

(P.s it's ok your English was just fine, I understand everything)

your writing is so good :(( i would really like to see more of professor ellie

Headcannons: professor!ellie williams x reader

masterlist

professor ellie masterlist

☆ Ellie leaves post-it notes around the house with little observations or facts—like “Did you know an octopus has three hearts?”—signed “Prof. Williams.”

☆ Her morning coffee routine is sacred; she makes a second cup automatically for you, even before you’re awake.

☆ She reads peer-reviewed articles in bed and mumbles criticisms under her breath while you drift off beside her.

☆ Ellie has a very specific chair she grades in and lets no one—not even you—sit in it. But you drape a throw blanket over it to “soften her edges.”

☆ She always corrects the grammar of signs in public and then immediately kisses your cheek to make up for it.

☆ You have a running list of vocabulary words she uses in daily conversation that you make fun of.

☆ Ellie panics if she forgets her planner—it’s her life line. You once hid it as a joke and she almost cried.

☆ You make her wear blue light glasses after she complained about headaches from too much screen time.

☆ Her books are all arranged by subject and subtopic, but there’s a tiny, chaotic shelf of novels you convinced her to read.

☆ She pretends to be annoyed when you fold her clothes wrong but secretly refolds them late at night with a fond smile.

☆ Ellie buys you vintage notebooks because she says your thoughts deserve a beautiful place to live.

☆ She underlines passages in her research books with faint hearts in the margins and lets you find them.

☆ Her favorite way to flirt is through long, winding academic arguments—and she always lets you win.

☆ You once called her "Doctor Williams" during a heated argument and it turned her on. She went silent and red.

☆ She creates elaborate metaphors from her lectures just to compliment you—“If you were a research subject, I'd violate the ethics code to know you better.”

☆ You sit in on her lectures sometimes and she always smirks when she spots you in the back.

☆ She corrects your pronunciation mid-conversation—then kisses your neck to distract you from being annoyed.

☆ Ellie keeps a secret folder on her laptop titled “My Favorite Theories,” and it’s full of quotes you’ve said.

☆ Her handwriting is almost illegible but she writes you love letters on university letterhead like it’s an academic report.

☆ You once found her writing a journal article about love, and every example was clearly about you.

☆ Ellie has a habit of muttering “mine” when you wear her glasses or sweaters.

☆ She's terrible at emotional vulnerability unless it’s 2 a.m. and she’s had too much wine.

☆ She’ll never admit it, but she tracks your schedule as carefully as she tracks her office hours.

☆ Ellie’s idea of intimacy is lying in bed silently, your legs tangled while she edits a manuscript.

☆ She’s obsessed with the back of your neck—always kissing it in passing like a reflex.

☆ You leave her little annotated notes in her books, and she keeps every single one like sacred texts.

☆ She has a playlist titled “My Subject of Study” and every song reminds her of you.

☆ She’s not great with selfies, but she secretly takes pictures of you reading, working, or laughing when you’re not looking.

☆ She’s fiercely protective of your mind—hates when others interrupt you or undermine your opinions in group settings.

☆ You once wrote her a poem and she printed it, framed it, and keeps it in her office behind a stack of journals so no one sees but her.

☆ Ellie spirals if she feels emotionally disconnected from you—she’ll reread texts and reanalyze conversations like case studies.

☆ She memorizes your patterns: the way you chew pens, sigh when thinking, the exact sound of your “I’m tired” voice.

☆ She keeps a folder of your academic achievements and personal wins like she’s building a resume for you.

☆ If someone flirts with you, Ellie becomes icy professional—like a polite shark.

☆ She has intrusive thoughts about losing you during lectures and will stop mid-slide to text “Are you okay?”

☆ You once made a joke about breaking up and she didn’t speak for six hours.

☆ She gets almost religiously intense when she talks about your intelligence—like you’re the final proof of something sacred.

☆ She knows your preferred citation style and uses it when she references you in footnotes.

☆ Ellie gets jealous when other professors praise you too highly—even if she agrees.

☆ You once caught her writing your initials over and over in the margins of her personal notebooks like a lovesick teen.

☆ When you fight, Ellie retreats into silence and overthinks every word you said until she’s made herself sick.

☆ Her apologies are long, detailed, and cited like a research paper—thesis statement, body, conclusion.

☆ She’s incredibly sensitive to tone—one “fine” from you can ruin her whole day.

☆ When she’s upset, she cleans obsessively—especially her desk. You always know something’s wrong when her pens are too perfectly aligned.

☆ She once sent you a long email titled “Re: Our Disagreement” instead of texting you after a fight.

☆ She’s terrified of not being enough for you—but tries to hide it under cold logic.

☆ You’ve had to pull her out of panic spirals during her worst grading weeks when she believes she’s failing at everything, including your relationship.

☆ Sometimes she offers you affection like an apology, and you have to remind her you don’t need to be earned.

☆ Ellie reads out loud to you when you can’t sleep—dense texts, soft poems, even her own work in progress.

☆ She writes one line of a love letter every day in the back of her planner. She says she’ll show it to you in a decade.

☆ She always keeps an extra charger for you in her bag—just in case.

☆ She never starts eating until she sees you take a bite first. Always.

☆ She writes tiny love notes on your receipts, your lecture printouts, your napkins.

☆ Ellie never says “I love you” casually—when she says it, she means it. Every. Time.

☆ She keeps a copy of your handwriting taped inside her wallet.

☆ She kisses your temple like it’s an academic ritual—precision, reverence, consistency.

☆ You once told her she talk-writes in her sleep—and now she worries she says too much while dreaming.

☆ Her love feels clinical sometimes: obsessive, methodical, deeply studied—but it’s real. And it’s yours.

☆ She saves up random facts just to tell you at night, as if your curiosity is the only thing that makes her day complete.

☆ Every time you tell her you love her, she still pauses—like it’s a theory she never quite believes she’s worthy of, but is so desperate to prove.

If you’re still doing song requests I’d love if you can do bad dog by Rosie ugly it’s so loser Ellie core

Bad dog - (ellie williams x reader)

Hi anon! firstly yes this song is so loser ellie and secondly i've never heard about Rosie before and their music slaps... i hope you enjoy:)

This story is based off the song Bad dog by Rosie! if you can please listen to the song as you're reading:)

Pairing: ellie x fem!reader

requests are open again! send me your silly thoughts

warnings: angst.

Summary: in which you treated her like a bad dog

authors note: so i left again and im so sorry, anyways my person life has been kak (that's a word in afrikaans lmao, it describes my emotion the best) but I've arrived and here to spam.

masterlist

Sometimes I feel like your lover

Savor salt while I'm there

But it feels like I'm drowning in the thick heavy air

And I'm only your souvenir

You put me outside like a bad dog

And you know you're missing out

On my love

On my love

I just want another taste of you

Right there under my tongue

It gets me feeling excited

Why am I tryna hide it?

you made her feel like a fucking dog.

A dog that has disappointed it's owner and that gets sent outside to wallow in self pity.

Sometimes you made her feel loved, you made her feel like she's the only girl alive. You made it seem like you would fucking die for her but today you made her feel like a dog.

Ellie doesn't know why she feels so hurt, you did this so often. She should be used to this.

The air surrounding you, Ellie and Dina was tense.

It was suffocating.

Ellie and Dina has been friends for years, but as soon as you came into the picture suddenly all the friends Ellie had drifted towards you.

Everyone loved you.

Who wouldn't? You were perfect. There was something about you that drew people, and Ellie loved that about you.

Ellie became a shell of herself. The once loud and confident Ellie Williams became a fucking loser who follows you like a shadow.

Your laugh filled the air, as Dina told a cringe dad joke, Ellie quietly sat watching the two of you.

Your words from earlier that day made her feel sick.

"Just because we fuck, doesn't mean we're something. We're really not anything but fuck buddies. Stop trying, you're pissing me off"

stop trying.

stop trying.

stop fucking trying.

Your presence made her so excited. Just smelling your perfume had her giggling.

How could she stop trying if you were the very reason for her existence?

She couldn't focus on the what Dina had to say, your laugh was mocking her.

Your harsh words were still replaying in her mind. They were suffocating her.

stop trying.

She meant nothing to you.

She should stop trying to win your love. You literally told her to stop.

Even though you made her feel like a fucking dog, the love she felt for kept her going and Ellie wasn't willing to give up.

Remember that song that you wrote me

It wakes me up in the morning

And it feels like I'm drowning in the memories I've been avoiding

And I cannot stop destroying

You put me outside like a bad dog

And you know you're missing out

On my love

On my love

I just want another taste of you

Right there under my tongue

It gets me feeling excited

Why am I tryna hide it?

Jesse told Ellie that you didn't deserve her love. He said that you were missing out on the best relationship of your life.

Jesse was right. Ellie knew she couldn't keep following you around, she knew she should stop hoping you'd fall to your kness and tell her how much you love her.

No, she had to face reality.

He was right.

All Ellie had to do was to go to your apartment and she had to tell you to fuck off. But when she tried she suddenly lost her ability to speak.

As soon as you smiled at her and asked "what's wrong baby?"

She couldn't.

She couldn't break her heart like that.

How can someone say something so hurtful and pretend like it didn't happen? You told her she meant nothing but yet you're calling her baby?

You were a fucked up person.

She wanted to hate you, but she couldn't.

Dogs are loyal to their owners. She wasn't going to leave. She was pathetic. A loser.

A loser who believes a girl who didn't see her as more than a fuck buddy would love her.

Ellie hopes you'll fall for her.

She hopes you listen to love songs and that you'd think of her.

Maybe the memories the two of you have created would consume you. Maybe you'd finally fall for her.

She tries to forget those memories, but she can't. The thought of you kills her.

You showed her love. You fucking cared for her when she was sick.

Surely it all wasn't platonic.

Maybe deep down you love her. Maybe you making her feel like shit was all apart of your plan to suppress your feelings for her.

Everything is a possibility at this point.

I'm all fucked up 'cause

I'm missing pieces

I'm all fucked up 'cause

I'm missing pieces

Ego dying

Loner island

I untied when

We went silent

Showed my colors

Stained the carpet

Not another

Fucking artist

Ellie is a puzzle.

She's incomplete without specific pieces.

Without her guitar, she felt empty. Without Joel she was lonely. Without you she felt like she had no purpose.

No matter how complicated Ellie was, no matter how fucked she was in the head you'd always show her love. Her dark thoughts went quiet, and her once dull life was filled with color because of you.

Ellie started drawing again after she quit years ago because you convinced her to try again.

You were the reason for her very being at this point. That's why she held on for so long. That's why she couldn't let go even though you made her feel like shit.

Ellie thought that she was going to stay in this toxic cycle for the rest of her life, and yes she would've if that meant a life with you.

But one day she woke up and everything around her was dull. There was no more color. No more excitement. When she was around you she felt tired. Drained.

You showed her the world but you destroyed it too.

She hated everything.

As much as she loved you she's had enough.

She has to take Jesse's advice and do what's best for her.

Here Ellie sat in front of the love of her life, telling you that this wasn't going to work.

"Ellie please" she heard your voice plead.

"I love you" Ellie muttered

"prove it" you said, frustration building up in you.

"Stay"

"I can't"

You were almost in tears. You were losing someone who helped you. You didn't love Ellie but she was of convince, she was there when you needed a quick fuck.

If she was just a quick fuck, then why does this hurt so much?

"Ellie if you love me you would stay"

"I love you i truly do, but i love myself too much to let you treat me like a bad dog"

<3

my pookie (the taglist): @hellorai

Dina ??? Masterlist

main master list

about me!

Stories｡𖦹°‧⭑.ᐟ

- one chance: In which the popular girl asked you out

- guard dog: In which you protected her

- could've been: in which you could've been something special

- all that's left is us: in which you found eachother

can u pretty please with a cherry on top make a part 4 to the milf abby 😔🙏🏼💟

Headcannons: Milf!abby anderson x reader (part 4)

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4

Authors note: Ladies and pookies I'm back! This last week has been the worst and most painful week of my life but, I'm back and better than ever <3

☆ Milf Abby who gets your initials tattooed on her ring finger.

You felt her calloused hands grab your waist as you stood admiring the ring she got you.

“it’s pretty” you muttered

“you’re pretty” she said with a smile

“shut up Abby” you shoved her to the side as you felt your face grow hot.

The two of you stood in silence for a while, enjoying the peace and quiet you both rarely get with Aubrey

“you know” Abby started “if the bride gets to wear an engagement ring, what about their partner?”

Your brows furrow, at the thought.

“that actually makes a lot of sense Abby. We should get you a ring-“

but before you could even finish you sentence Abby lifted up her right hand revealing the tattoo.

“what the fuck Abigail”

☆ Milf Abby who refers to you as her wife long before the wedding.

“Yeah my wife and I went there”

“she’s my wife”

“my wife likes that show” “you know what they say happy wife happy life”

☆ Milf Abby who buys you white dresses as gifts just to see what you would look like in white, because she really couldn’t wait for the wedding.

☆ Milf Abby who’s literally a perfectionist and plans the wedding without a planner.

“No, you aren’t folding the napkins right” “that isn’t the right shade of pink”

☆ Milf Abby who asks her daughter to be the ring bearer and the maid of honor.

Aubrey looked at you with curious eyes as Abby placed the box onto her lap.

“dude what’s this?”

“Aubrey I’m not your friend, who taught you that word?” Abby sighed

“grandpa did” “of course he did. He really needs to stop-“

 “Abby lets focus on the box” you interrupted her, knowing this conversation wasn’t going anywhere.

“Can I open it please?” Aubrey asked you, with a polite smile.

“of course she’s nice to you! You little gremlin-“

“Abby!”

Abby felt Aubrey pinch her arm at the gremlin comment

“why would you-“

“ok” you said with a stern voice “lets open the box, you guys can fight later”

sometimes it felt like you were living with children.

Aubrey’s small hands grabbed the box, eagerly tearing away the wrapping paper. In the box lay a simple white dress, with paper rings. The little girl gently grabbed the fabric, inspecting it. She saw the rings and it took her a while to get it.

“I’m carrying the rings?!” she yelled

“and we were hoping you’d be our maid of honor too” you pulled out a basket from behind you and the girls smile grew.

☆ Milf Abby who begs you to let her go with you when you go wedding dress shopping.

“please”

“Abby its bad luck”

“fuck the bad luck”

☆ Milf Abby who sends you thumbs down emoji’s the whole time you were gone.

☆ Milf Abby who doesn’t want to sleep in separate houses the night before the wedding.

☆ Milf Abby who sends you cringe Facebook minion memes and jokes because she misses you. This was your first night apart in months, but she knew after tonight she would be waking up with you next to her for the rest of her life.

☆ Milf Abby who barley slept that night. She wasn’t sure if she was nervous or excited.

☆ Milf Abby who gets ready extremely early. Her hair was out of her normal tight braid, and the hair fell to her shoulders. Her black suit hugging her in all the right places.

☆ Milf Abby who starts at herself in the mirror too long, and she suddenly notices her wrinkles, she suddenly notices the grey hairs.

☆ Milf Abby who gets cold feet.

☆ Milf Abby who starts crying because you didn’t deserve this.

You needed someone younger, some who doesn’t have back pains and complains about their joints hurting. Someone who wasn’t turning 50 soon.

Someone who won’t die soon.

You needed more than Abby.

Abby’s loud sobs filled the room as she looked at herself in the mirror.

She should call this off.

“Abby?” her head snapped to the direction of the door. It was her dad. She quickly wiped her eyes, and she sniffed a couple of times. “hey dad” he slowly walked towards her, and he gently sat next to her, putting his hand on her shoulder he muttered “you okay?”

The blonde sitting next to him broke out in sobs, her head fell to his shoulder “oh honey” he breathed as he held her close.

“Abby what’s wrong?” He felt his daughter tremble next to him. “i- I’m keeping her back in life” Abby started, and Jerry just sat and listened to her.

“I’m so old I’m probably going to die soon. Who wants to be married to a grandma? One of these days I won’t be able to get out of bed without complaining. And she’s so pretty and young- she-she deserves everything, and what can I give her? My future dentures?”

“have you ever thought that this is what she wanted?”

Abby lifted her head to what her father said.

“The fact she’s marrying you proves that the love she has for you is endless. She’s willing to look after you when you do get those dentures. She wants you as much as you want her Abby, don’t let your insecurities stop you from being with the love of your life. And yeah, you’ll get old, but she’ll be with you”

☆ Milf Abby who goes to the venue earlier than everyone to make sure everything is ok.

☆ Milf Abby who stood at the altar with sweaty palms, waiting for your arrival.

☆ Milf Abby who started crying as soon as you start walking down the aisle.

 ☆ Milf Abby who couldn’t take her eyes off you the whole ceremony because she realized that this was it. She was marrying you.

☆ Milf Abby who shed more tears than you did during your vows and she cried even more when Aubrey came with the rings.

☆ Milf Abby who practically jumps on you when they said she could kiss you.

You felt her hands grab your face, and she brought you in for a rough kiss.

The crowned screamed around the two of you and you heard the clicks of all the cameras. You felt Abby’s lips smile against yours before she pulled away putting her head against yours.

She whispered “I’ll love you forever”

“I love you too abs, forever and always”

Okay so kinda a old song butttt it’s my favorite can you do something with laugh it off by Chelsea jade it’s kinda a breakup song to me

Laugh it off - (ellie williams x reader)

Hi anon! Firstly the intro of this song is so fucking good, and also real! I thought it was a break up song too.... I hope you enjoy&lt;3

This story is based off the song, Laugh it off by Chelsea Jade! If you can, please listen to the song as you're reading:)

Pairing: ellie x fem!reader

requests are always open, feel to send me one or a song and I'll take it from there:) Just a reminder that if you request something and you want something specific to happen you should indicate it in your request.

Warnings: meantions of cheating and sex

Summary: In which Ellie tries to fix your relationship after she was unfaithful

wc: ???

about me the request playlist

You're coming in hot, but not so bright

Making a meal of any appetite

Just take it easy

'Cause if I held you up against the light

I could see clear enough to cut right

To where you're weakest

"just take it easy" Ellie spoke to you as she reached across the table to grab your hand.

You felt a shiver run down the spine, at the small contact. You and Ellie have not touched each other for months, and you weren't going to lie, you've felt empty and cold without her.

Ellie hesitantly interlocked her fingers with yours. A surprised look overtook Ellies features.

You let her hold your hand? For the last 6 months you made her life a living hell, depriving her from touching your and finally, finally you let her touch you.

It's crazy to think that the person you once knew so well, became someone you don't recognize.

The Ellie sitting infront of you wasn't the girl you fell in love with two years ago. And the way you were acting right now wasn't the sweet girl Ellie met and once loved.

The Ellie you fell in love with would never cheat on you.

It's crazy to think the person you once knew from the inside out wanted nothing to do with you.

Ellie knew your hopes and dreams, she knew your fears and she knew what kept you up at night. But the person she was sitting across was not that person anymore.

You weren't the girl that used to scream everytime she saw a spider. You weren't the girl that looked at Ellie with so much love and care, now you stared at her with a cold and icy look. A look of hatred, and anger.

There was no love left in you.

You weren't Ellie's girl anymore and she realized she fucked up everything.

"So...." Ellie started.

The air surrounding you was tense, your hands were still interlocked. You felt Ellies hand became sweaty, you felt the table moving due to her leg bouncing up and down.

She was nervous.

The future of your relationship depends on what you had to say. Ellie couldn't take the suspense.

Were you actually going to forgive her after what she did?

Ellie believes everyone deserves a second chance. She deserves one. She made a mistake. It's not as if you've never made one over the last two years you were together.

"Are you enjoying dinner?" Ellie asked awkwardly.

She watched you look up from the plate of food and you simply replied with "no".

Ellie frowned at your response, she thought you liked spaghetti?

"I thought you loved spaghetti?" she asked, confused.

"I don't like it anymore"

"what? Since when?"

"Since you fucking cheated on me"

Ellie went quite after that. She stared at you with glossy eyes, she hated when you brought this up.

"That night..." you started "it was our anniversary and I made spaghetti, and guess what Elie?" You asked her.

"My girlfriend was fucking someone else when I decided to suprise her" you started laughing as if it was the funniest joke ever.

Ellie started sweating with embrassment.

The room felt hot and stuffy.

Ellie waited for you to keep quite before she spoke again, "it was a mistake"

"This relationship was a mistake" you replied.

Ellie looked at you with her eyes wide "you don't mean that" she said softly, as the tears glossed her eyes once again.

"You said you loved me, you said we were meant to be" Ellie spoke.

"Maybe I was lying" you answered as you removed your hand from Ellie's grip. You got up and you walked out of the restaurant, not looking back at her.

Maybe trying to fix this relationship was a mistake. Maybe she should stop trying.

But you were worth fighting for.

I can tell that

You wanna laugh it off, but you're lazy

And I've been trying to make amends with you lately

But you're difficult to reason with and maybe

Just maybe

Want my chest to keep it heavin'

On the lighter side of feelin'

I'm not going into grievin' for you, for you, for you

So i'm just gonna laugh it off

"you can't keep ignoring my calls" was the first thing Ellie said as she walked into your apartment.

She heard you close the door as you walked towards her, and all you could said was "I can".

Ellie let out a groan of frustration. She was trying. She was really trying to fix things. To earn your trust again, but you were making it so fucking difficult.

Ellie tried taking you on dates, but you leave her alone at the end of every night. She tried to call and text you but you would never answer.

"How are we supposed to fix things if you keep ignoring me?" Ellie asked.

"Who said I wanted to fix things?"

Ellie opened her mouth in suprise.

"If I remembered correctly you came to my apartment crying, literally begging for me to take you back. To give you another chance" you spat out at her.

Ellie looked down at her feet before she quietly muttered "I came back because i love you".

You let out a laugh. Ellie loved you? If she did she would've never cheated on you.

"Love is about forgiveness" Ellie interrupted your laughing session.

You stopped laughing and you just stared at her. "For fucks sake Ellie, you cant mess something up and expect everything to be ok"

And once again you left Ellie speechless. "Now get out of my apartment" you yelled at her.

How long does one fight for something before you give it up? How long does Ellie have to fight to get you back? How long was she still going to be punished before you'd forgive her?

Ellie used to think that you're trying to hurt her on purpose. But the more Ellie thought about the more she realized that she deserved it. She was the one who cheated and she needs to suffer the consequences of her actions.

Ellie went back to you because she realized her mistake. She realized that you were the only woman for her. And she fought really fucking hard to get you back, and now that she has you she realizes what she did has caused deeper problems than what she initially thought.

You weren't being difficult on purpose, you weren't trying to hurt her. You were treating Ellie this way because she hurt you.

Ellie wishes you'd just listen. That you'd hear her out, that you'd let her explain. But what was there to explain? She cheated because she was drunk? She imagined she was fucking you instead?

But she couldn't blame you, because if you did the same thing Ellie wouldn't even accepted your apology.

If she had a time machine, Ellie would go back in time, to make her not go out that night, she wish she could back and stop herself from drinking so much, she wishes she could go back and stop herself from bringing that girl home.

So many regrets, and so many mistakes, but yet she could do nothing to fix it.

I wanna be wrong, but it don't feel right

Lighting my name up with an exit sign

You got me leavin'

You're pushing me into this falling out

And the moment that I watch my mouth

I lose the feeling

Ellie went out with a bunch of coworkers that night.

Ellie wasn't stupid, she knew she was an attractive girl, and where ever she went heads turned in her direction.

That night Ellie drank more than she normally did due to the amount of stress she was under.

Her boss was breathing down her ass, giving her assignment after assignment and she just needed a break. As Ellie kept taking shot after shot, feeling the liquid burn her throat, her eyes landed on a tall brunette.

The girl winked at Ellie, and all Ellie did was give her a smirk as she walked towards her. One thing led to another, and Ellie took the girl home.

It was about 1:00am when Ellie heard her front door open, but with her head between the girls thighs she couldn't focus on anything else.

The girl put her hands into Ellies hair as she threw back her head letting out a loud moan. "You like that?" Ellie chuckled as she went up to kiss the girl.

As they were making out Ellie heard a familiar voice from behind the door.

"your kitchen light was on so I assumed I'd come say happy anniversary early even though it's 1-"

Ellies head snapped towards the door, as she heard a glass fall onto the floor. Heavy breathes fell from Ellies lips as she looked at you staring at her with tears in your eyes.

"On our fucking anniversary?" You cried loudly as the tears fell from your eyes. You ran out the house, and all Ellie did was watch you ran away.

She watched you cry. She watched you walked out.

The girl Ellie was hooking up with, was grabbing her clothes and yelling at Ellie for being a piece of shit. But Ellie wasn't paying attention to her.

The girl walked out the apartment, and Ellie was left there. Alone and half naked.

All Ellie could do was stare at the broken plate, and her floor filled with spaghetti.

'Cause I got the good sense to laugh it off, but this is crazy

You make it seem like I'm the one who's being shady

But your love is in the liminal and maybe

Just maybe

"what the fuck Ellie?" You yelled.

Ellie had shown up to your apartment, once again, drunk and saying random things.

"Hi" she slurred before she put her arm around your shoulder.

"Did you know, Jesse cheated om Dina and she laughed it off?"

"Are you saying I should pretend you never cheated, and just laughed at it like it was a joke?"

Ellie hummed.

All you could do was let put a sigh as you removed Ellie's jacket before you placed her on the couch.

You left Ellie blabbering on the couch as you walked yo her room to get her a blanket.

You felt guilty for wanting to leave Ellie. You felt like you played a part, in why she cheated on you.

Maybe you didn't give her enough attention? Maybe you didn't treat her right?

Ellie never knew this, but you blamed yourself for a long time. You felt like you were the reason she cheated. But after a while you realized that it wasn't your fault.

You knew you deserved better. You deserved to be in a happy relationship and that person wasn't Ellie.

You grabbed a soft blanket that Ellie had gotten you for your 5 month anniversary almost two years ago, and you brought it to her.

You covered her with the blanket, as you looked down at her beautiful face.

She looked so peaceful. So innocent.

"I love you" Ellie whisperered, before she fell asleep.

If only you still felt the same

Oh, oh

I'm just gonna laugh it off

Oh, ohh

'Cause the air's got a weight right now

And I can't help but feel out your heavy breathing

I'm only teasing

You and Ellie sat in awkward silence in her apartment.

You cleared your throat as you looked at her: "I've made my decision- about us"

Ellie let out a sigh of relief. Finally, you were finally going to talk to her, you were finally going to forgive her and things would go back to normal.

Ellie stared at you with a smile on her face, waiting for you to say that you'd forgiven her.

"I think we should break up"

"what? No"

"Ellie please let me go... you know this will never work out" you whisperered.

And Ellie let out a loud sob at your request.

How could you ask that from her? How do you give up someone you love so much?

Ellie started sobbing because she realized there was no going back from this because she had truly lost you forever. This was all her fault.

You got up as Ellie continued to cry. And you walked towards the door, before you looked back at her, as she sat there sobbing like a baby.

"Ellie remember when you said that love is about forgiveness?"

You heard Ellie sniffle before she looked up at you with swollen but hopeful eyes.

She nodded as an answer to your question.

"If you love me, you'd forgive me for leaving you"

And with that you walked out her apartment, closing the door behind you.

And once again Ellie was left alone. Her sobs filled the room, as she fell onto her knees.

Maybe she should've let you go the first time.

Authors note: guess who's back, back again! I hope you enjoyed! Remember my requests are always open, feel free to leave one! Remember you are loved and to always be kind!

Yours truly,

Zia <3

Idk if ur taking requests anymore, but I rly love ur stories! Could you do an Ellie x reader story based on the song together by beabadoobee? THANK UUU!!

Together (ellie williams x reader)

hi anon! thank you sm for the request, and for the compliment, i started giggling... i hope you enjoy this pookie <3

This story is based off the song Together by Beabadoobee, if you can please listen to the song as you're reading:)

Pairing: ellie x fem!reader

Requests are always open feel free to leave one! You can send me a song and I'll take it from there!

Warnings: toxic relationships, death, suicide and self harm and a little blasphemy

Summary: Your relationship was toxic, you both knew this... but yet both of you couldn't stay away from each other

wc: 1.7k

(If you want to be added to my tag list, just leave a comment so i can tag you in future work!)

Crash the car again

The same mistakes again

Don't wanna hurt you like I did

Screaming, crying, dishonesty. These were some of the words you used to describe you and Ellie’s relationship. It was unhealthy. It was toxic. Religious people would always quote that one bible verse where it says a dog would vomit and then it would go back to eat its vomit. The same way sinners would go back to sin. The same way you would go back to Ellie.

You and Ellie’s relationship hadn’t always been toxic, there were happy times too. The times she would come over and the two of you would watch a movie together, that one time Ellie snuck you out of Jackson to show you a dinosaur museum. You were happy. Very happy.

Until Joel died.

When Joel died Ellie changed. She became cold, distant.

 But you understood why. She was grieving.

And you truly did assume that eventually she’ll go back to normal. But then her obsession with finding Abby started. She left Jackson. You were broken.

Life without Ellie felt like a life without sunlight. There was no light. No joy. It was cold. You remembered the countless nights of you crying yourself to sleep. The nights you would reach over and touch the side of the bed Ellie lay on. It was always cold. The cold side of the bed was a painful reminder that she chose revenge over you.

But Ellie came back to Jackson.

You were happier than ever.  Because you waited for Ellie. You put your life on hold for her, because you couldn’t imagine a life without her.

Ellie changed. She became more aggressive. One second she would be ok the next moment she’d explode with anger. Hurtful words leaving her mouth. And that was when you decided to breakup with her, for the first time.

The breakup lasted 2 weeks. And you went back to her again. The arguments and lies got worse, and you left. For a second time. But not long after you came back. You would always come back.

That’s probably why you were standing outside Ellie’s house. The two of you had an argument 3 weeks ago. Ellie had lied to you about where she slept the previous night saying “don’t worry baby I’m going to Maria and Tommy” but you soon found out she went to her ex-girlfriend’s house.

She lied. You were hurt. You felt Betrayed. And you broke up with her again.

But you came back. You had to talk to Ellie.

But for the first time ever, you weren’t here to take Ellie back, you weren’t here to listen to her bullshit promises, you were here to say goodbye. You were her to end it all, so that you could be free from Ellie’s harsh words. You were doing this for yourself. And for the sake of your mental health.

You shakily reached for the door, your left had curling into a fist, you felt the wood on your knuckles as you lightly knocked.

The door flew open, revealing Ellie in all her glory. Her autumn brown hair is longer, reaching past her shoulders, dark circles covered the bottom of her beautiful eyes.

“Baby?” she asked softly eyes wide.

'Cause I'm not waiting for you

But I don't want to hurt you

Ellie knew Joel’s death affected her in more ways than one. She knew her mental health suffered because of his death. Out of everyone she hurt and killed the last person she wanted to cause any harm to was you. But it was as if she couldn’t stop herself from hurting you.

She couldn’t kill Abby because she knew it wouldn’t bring Joel back. She was filled with anger. Pain. Hatred and she didn’t know how to get it out. And there you were. Her soft and sweet girl, that waited for her.

In a way Ellie was jealous of you. How innocent you were. All the people she killed, everything she did to try and get Joel some justice, just made her dirty. And there you were. Ellie sometimes wondered why you wouldn’t just leave her. All she did was hurt you.

She wanted to make you feel what she felt all these months as she went after Abby. But yet you stayed. And that’s why she was so surprised to see you standing in front of her house with a small smile on your face.

“Hi els” you spoke softly; your eyes briefly fell to the floor as if you were preparing to tell her something. Something big. Something Important.

 After a few seconds your eyes met again, and you spoke once more; “we need to talk”

All alone again

It hurts my heart again

I think my blood is running thin

I'm away again

It hurts my head again

Don't wanna be away from your skin

As toxic as your relationship was, you both couldn’t stay away from each other. The countless times you and Ellie broke up, the two of you would sneak out to meet each other. Just to be in each other’s presence.

 Neither you or Ellie would never admit it: but you can’t live without each other. The two of you had built such a bond that you were both so incredibly dependent on the other for comfort. All the nights Ellie cried when you left her, all the days Ellie would plead and beg you to come back because she would change and she would be a better person. She really tried. But she couldn’t. Her past was haunting her. It traumatized her. Broke her beyond repair. When she looks at you the only thing she could imagine was all the people she had to kill. But at the same time she felt comforted by your smile.

Ellie was planning on changing but she doesn’t know how.

 How does one go back to the way they were before they watched their father figure get brutally murdered?

But you had other plans. There isn’t going to be a next time. You weren’t going to let Ellie say another word that will put you into another depressive episode. You had to end it all.

You sat across her, and Ellie felt like her heart was being ripped into a million pieces. It felt like her heart was shattered, and you were watching her bleed pout.

She had been shot, stabbed, but the pain of the words you muttered, hurts even more.

“Earth to Ellie” you said because she went silent. She zoned out thinking of all the ways she could try to get back together with you.

 “No” Ellie spoke “you can’t do this”

“I can” you said softly the room fell silent, the tension rising.

 “Ellie” you spoke again “we can never be together again” you started “you hurt me too much” and Ellie felt shame wash over her.

“I’m sorry” she said with a pleading look in her eyes “I’ll change” and Ellie watched you shake your head.

“You never fucking changed, what makes me think you’ll do it now?” you spoke harshly.

You got up and started walking towards the door. Ellie felt the tears running down her cheeks. She watched your figure walk towards the door. You didn’t even look back at her.

 “Goodbye Ellie”

Hurt myself again

I thought you'd notice it

Don't wanna fix it like you did

Your body was found on a Saturday morning. You were hanging from the roof. You had hung yourself. You didn’t leave a note. No one knows why you killed yourself. Your secrets died with you, the reason and the problems you faced, went to the grave with you. And this puzzled Ellie.

Why didn’t you tell her?

 Yes, your relationship was bad, but you could’ve told her. She would’ve helped you. She would’ve hurt those who harmed you.

Two days after your body was found your words ran in Ellie’s mind.

You keep hurting me….

It was her. Ellie was the problem. Ellie was the reason you felt so depressed that you ended your life.

 It was all her fault

She felt bad, guilty. She murdered you. She had your blood on her hands. Ellie didn’t deserve to be alive. The day of your funeral she watched as your body was lowered into the ground, Ellie’s loud sobs echoing across all of Jackson. Ellie wished that was her. She wished she was the one being buried because you didn’t deserve that. Ellie start hurting herself. She’d watch her blood drip onto her bed as she cut herself. She wishes she could give some of her blood to you. She wishes she could give life back to you. Her blood in exchange for your life. The way Jesus died on the cross to give us eternal life the same way she wanted to die. For you. To give you the life you deserved.

I think I'm okay by myself, I'm doing great

But we'd be better together, better together

Together though, together though, together again

Ellie thought your death would be good for her. Maybe if you weren’t there she’d be ok. But your death made everything worse for Ellie. She thought she could live in a world without you. She realized she couldn’t and as Ellie took her final breath as she lay on her bed bleeding out, she hoped that she would be reunited with you in the afterlife, that the two of you would finally be together.

 They say death separates people. Death rips families and relationships apart. And that’s what Joel’s death did to you and Ellie’s relationship. His death ruined the only good thing both of you had left. But now that both you and Ellie have passed away, she hoped that her death might bring you back together. For your souls to be intertwined.

Ellie hoped that if God was real that he would take pity on her and forgive her sins. That He let the two of you be together in the afterlife. That death would bring you closer. And that you’d be together forever.

Authors note: Sorry for going MIA again, life has been kinda messy rn, but I promise I’ll try and get more stories out soon, to all the requests in my inbox, I swear I’ll write your stories soon. Remember you are loved and my requests are always open!!

Yours truly

Zia <3

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

THANK YOU, I LOVE YOU GUYS SM

I'm in actual fucking tears