4/100 Days Of Productivity

Hello all, it's me again

I just wanted to give an update and to tell you why I am off of the grid all these months

I have been dealing with toxic shame a lot, and it has been exacerbated by working a job that is not related to my studies and my poor mental health. There is an irrational thought in my heart that I am undeserving of my studies, and seeing all the positive/productive posts. I know it makes no sense... I have felt this way since I was very little, and the origins of these feelings are very complex, so I don't think there is an easy solution for this...

I am not doing better when it comes to this, but I can't just give in to these feelings!!! So I will try to be more active on here and also be more honest, because I know I am not alone in this struggle 🏵️ Might help someone get out of their shell too :> I know it's hard, but I shouldn't betray myself like this

“Everything we call real is made of things that cannot be regarded as real.”

—Niels Bohr, Danish physicist and 1922 Nobel Prize winner in physics

doing your best doesn’t mean you have to work until exhaustion. doing your best doesn’t mean you have to give it 100% all of the time. doing your best can be working until you’ve hit your limit and then respecting your limit.

above and below, 2022, ig

Have to study statistical physics today... How's your day going?

ppl on here get sooo mad when someone says you should be a little bit grateful for lgbt allies like sorry but i have homophobic overbearing parents & im used to people thinking gays are freaks and “groomers” so the concept of “cishet people who are willing to ally themselves with the lgbt liberation movement” is something i dont think ill ever take for granted. but thats just me i guess idk. yeah its praising the bare minimum but receiving the bare minimum allyship is a blessing when im used to deeply entrenched homophobia. i’d rather shit talk the people who actually want me dead instead of the cishets showing up at pride to day drink with drag queens. what does ridiculing them do except ruin the vibe :|

Heiko Hellwig: Silicon Cities (2018)

sometimes you run into something that just overturns your understanding and builds a new, more coherent picture. this is one of them.

they taught us about diffraction theory at uni - Fresnel, Fraunhofer all of that, we did experiments with lasers - but it never occurred to me to analyse lenses in terms of diffraction. it makes so much sense now! i was never entirely satisfied by the ray approximation to light, so seeing what's really going on in the lightfield and how you can use a diffraction plate as a lens, with each ring contributing higher order Fourier terms to the image, is like. crazy cool.

northern lights photographed from space

So happy to finally share this shot with you: a conjunction of the ISS and the moon. This shot required meticulous planning and precise timing to achieve, and the full image (in the second post in the thread) is one of my all-time favorites. CR:AM