Idk I Just Really Don't Like Warm Food/drinks.

In a way, I'm really scared losing weight will make me look more feminine (because I always used to have broad shoulders and I have now clue what my face will look like once all the fat is finally off)

So I'm hoping that I can lose as much weight as possible on my hips, thighs and lower belly, because once I'll be able to just wear any pants without them looking ridiculous because they're either way too large or make me look curvy and more like a woman, I'll look more like a guy/androgynous, right? Right???

That's so hypothetically speaking I need to lock the fuck in first

But I'm so excited for when I'll finally have a flat chest

Gay with an eating disorder?

Nah man I go by wlwlw

(Get it? Please tell me someone gets it lol)

"i'm so bored i don't know what to do!!!" i said with 4 homeworks to do, 11 school texts to copy, a test to study for, a new subject to memorize (i'll end up doing nothing)

getting used to the hunger once again (it's literally the best feeling)

Bread. Bread is my worst enemy. I am more than convinced of its evil intentions towards me, but I will thwart this dastardly beast as well.

I feel dirty and I don't feel real

Like it seriously feels like being fat is blocking me from actually living and being someone

I know that sounds silly but I can't take myself serious like this

And I don't know who I am if I'm not skinny

Okay. Just because I've always been fat or chubby or "average" doesn't mean it has to stay this way forever.

Crazy how fast you can get on the weird side of Pinterest

Maybe locking in starts with simply logging my calories on my app, instead of trying to pretend it didn't happen or "it wasn't that bad".

Yes, I binged, yes, I feel like a piece of shit but I can always draw the line.

I may gain weight today, but I can stay determined during the week and make a realistic plan for the weekend and actually stick to it.

I shouldn't deny my mistakes or wallow in self pity, but rather use them as a reminder what I am actually fighting for and what kind of behaviours even made me (partly) start doing this in the first place, and I can learn from my mistakes. Honestly I'm motivated to take on this week, even if I completely fucked up this weekend, or maybe especially because of that.

loser idiot binges instead of starving