Imagine instead of Ms.Weems being murdered by Ms. Thornhill it was you instead and Tyler being there the whole time seeing his girlfriend dieâŠ
And yes you have my permission to use any of my imagines as a story or a oneshot/imagine!
OML THIS IS GOOD!!! Definitely DEFINITELY need a part 2!!!
Barty Crouch Jr. X Potter!Reader
Summary: after a chance meeting in the library; a whirlwind love affair between Barty Crouch Jr and the youngest Potter blossom, but neither of them were prepared for how life would go after.
AN: MONTHS. I have finally finished this after MONTHS. Sorry if the writing style is a bit whiplash, I have changed a lot since then. I can't get away from Barty he owns my whole heart
CW: not proof read, no use of Y/N, Obsessive!Barty(implied obsessive reader), sexual themes and scenes, graveling and begging, Protective Sirius and James, fighting, lying, self indulgent, cursing, Remus x reader if you squint, angst, angst with slightly happy ending, fem reader, not cannon complacent, sexual innuendo, underage drinking, major character death (unless...?)
WC: ~17k
You never felt as bold or as powerful as you did at Hogwarts, walking the halls with your older brother and his friends.Â
Shamelessly you always thought they were the coolest. The Marauders, James Potter; Head Boy, Remus Lupin; Prefect, Sirius Black; one of the most clever and strongest duelists in the school, and Peter Pettigrew; the sweetest boy you'd ever meet.Â
They had a reputation for themselves even before you came to the school a year later. Not that it surprised you, your brother had always been a moth to the limelight. You were just happy he never aimed that at you, being fiercely protective of his little sister. They all were pretty defensive when it came to âlittle Potter.â
But, there was only so much their help could do.
âDreadful! A Dreadful on my potions exam!â You groaned as you wiggled the parchment in front of you, as if shaking it enough would change the ink that was etched on the page.
âI have never gotten such a low score in my life!â You whined and hugged the paper. Giving a small sigh as Sirius ruffled your hair. âCalm it, Bambi. Itâs just a practice test. You're becoming Moony.â
Sirius gestured behind his back to Remus, who was wearing an offended look.
âI'm sorry I couldn't help you more.â Lily called over from under your brother's arm, sending you a sympathetic look. You just mumbled.
âItâs alright, Red. If even you canât save me, Iâm well and truly done for.â You groaned and Remus nudged you with his elbow.
âI could always give you a hand.âÂ
You shook your head and bit your cheek. âNah, think itâs best I crack on alone. No distractions.â You waved your hands out dramatically, full of resolve. Enough to make Sirius laugh at you and Lily to roll her eyes fondly. The redhead looked up and smirked at James who seemed to be lost in his own little world, staring at her.Â
âJamie, dearest?âÂ
He blinked out of his daze and smiled at her. âWhat's that?â
âWere you paying any mind to your little sister?âÂ
âShe was talking?â He muttered and looked over at you, greeted by a bird that wasn't under his arm, instead poking from between your index and ring finger. âAh, so Iâve finally learned to tune her out. Only took me seventeen years.â
âSod off.â You stuck your tongue out at him and he blew a raspberry back, before Lily gave him a reprimanding smack on his shoulder.Â
âYou're meant to be head boy.â She huffed and you just smirked.Â
âHow they let him get that badge, Iâll never know!â You shouted up to your brother who made a mocking face at you with his eyes crossed. Remus snickering from your other side.
âOi, James, keep it to yourself,â Peter mumbled, shuffling out of spitting range.
âIt's like watching two first years go at it.â Sirius mumbled and Remus shrugged. âI don't think they ever left that age.â
You rolled your eyes fondly at the jabs as Lily grabbed your brother's face and squished his cheeks, leaving him a smiling fool.
âOkay, I'm heading to the library.â You offered and got a variety of responses as you left. âGot to make sense of this disaster of a grade.â
Their echoes of conversation faded out as your shoes hit the path to the library. Once there, you were shocked to see how many people were studying in the now cramped hall. It was fair to say that everyone here had a poor score on their test.
What was worse is you didn't recognize a single person. Not well enough to sit with.
You walked down the long path between the aisle and tried to spot an open seat somewhere. That was, until you spotted an empty table. An entirely empty table with a few spare books shoved across the old oak. You lit up and hurried over to take the seat closest to the wall. Setting up your things to begin to study, not noticing how people had been avoiding that table like the plague.
As you set up your books and notes you were oblivious to any presence around you, until the seat right next to you was pulled out. âYou knowâŠâ
You looked up quickly and you were greeted by a pair of piercing green eyes that made your heart stop. What was it with Potters and green eyes? You'd never know.Â
âIf you wanted my seat that bad, you could have just asked.â You were suddenly snapped to your senses when you recognized the voice.
Bartemius Crouch Junior. Fuck.
You didn't talk to many RavenClaws, you hardly talked to any male classmates considering how often your brother would scare them off. Sirius wasn't much help either.
However, Crouch had a special reputation. Hanging around dangerous Slytherins, loud, dangerous, obsessive and as smart as a damned whip. You only knew what Sirius told you about him, which was nothing good, considering how both of them absolutely despised each other. James didn't like him either, but Lily spoke highly of him.
Lily spoke highly of almost anyone, though.
You only realized you had been staring at him when he arched his eyebrow.
âCat got your tongue, Potter?â He teased as he took his seat and you snapped out of your thoughts. Still just blinking owlishly at him. This made him chuckle softly, leaving him to simply shrug and get back to work.
With how he behaved around most of the students you expected him to chase you off or bare his fangs- maybe bite you. Who knows? People described him more like a rabid animal than a proper student. Yet you had sat in his seat, at his table, pushed aside and even stolen one of his books, and he was as calm as a cat.Â
âEr- sorry, I didn't mean to intrude.â You whispered and he glanced over at you. Meeting your eyes with a slowly growing smile.
âSo she does talk?â He teased and you pursed your lips.
âWhen she wants to.â
âThat's not very Potter of you.â
âIt's very me of me.â
His smile only grew as your banter continued. His shoulders seemed to relax and he became a bit more playful. You felt like you might be insane, were there two Crouchs? There is no way this is the same boy who almost beat Sirius to a pulp over a remark about his own brother.
âSo⊠do you mind if I study here?â You asked softly and he shrugged, going back to his paper.Â
âI don't mind a pretty face.âÂ
This time it was your turn to smile, rolling your eyes a bit fondly. You got back to your notes, writing down each problem you had gotten wrong and looking for the proper potion recipe, starting with Wiggenweld. You began to mutter to yourself as you looked across three different books. Rubbing your temple in irritation as you tried to understand the ingredients and grew more and more infuriated.Â
âYou're doing it wrong.â You heard Barty mumble from beside you. You snapped your head over to glare at him and it only served to make him chuckle.Â
âI don't think I've ever seen a Dreadful in my life.âÂ
You flushed a bit and moved your wrist to hide your marks. âWhat happened to you being nice to me?â
âSorry, sorry.â He chuckled and shifted his seat a bit closer to you, looking at the books. âWhat's got you confused?â
âI just..â You sighed and gestured to the books. âEvery one of these say something different! Salamander blood until it turns yellow, then orange, then green. But this one says Unicorn horn and Lionfish spines. And then this one says Sloth-â
âWoah woah woah, pretty girl, breath.â He pushed and you took a sharp breath. No one but Sirius had ever called you that, and certainly not in that tone. He lifted his arm and you got a good view of his bare forearm from where his sleeve was rolled up, showing off a tattoo, a snake wrapped around a magpie, you think. He smiled at how you took it in. âDid it myself.â
Your eyes widened and looked at him in shock. He seemed giddy with excitement at your interests. âThat and this,â He mused and stuck out his tongue, using his middle fingers to press it flat against his lip. Showing off his tongue piercing and his black nails. Your eyebrows shot up to your hair line.
Him and Sirius were scarily alike. It was almost comforting.
âWoahâŠâ You mumbled and he laughed. Smiling ear to ear.
âLook here, kid.â
âI'm your age-â
âShhh, I'm spitting wisdom.âÂ
You couldn't help but laugh and relax fully as his fingers lined the pages of one of your books. âThe reason they are so different is the one thing Professor Slug on my Horn doesn't tell you,â You laughed a bit in surprise at the vulgar nickname, âIs the potions you study under him have several different ways to make it. Salamander blood being the one taught in class.â
You looked back at the books and tilted your head a bit. âWhy wouldn't they tell you that?â
âYour guess is as good as mine. I don't even use those recipes, I made my own.âÂ
You looked over at him in shock and he just smiled at you.Â
You knew Crouch was a genius, he made sure everyone knew. But to have your own concoction for the potion you couldn't figure out how to brew according to instructions? You were baffled.
âReally?âÂ
He nodded and you furrowed your brow. âWhy Wiggenweld?â
His lip twitched and you could see as the smile left his eyes but not his lips, slowly biting his cheek. âI'm prone to.. accidents.âÂ
âYour fights.â You whispered and he shrugged.Â
âThose too.â
âTypical Crouch behavior.â You murmured, a hint of amusement creeping into your voice. Talking to him was feeling more natural by the second. âAlways getting into trouble.â
He grinned at that, leaning back in his chair with a casual confidence that was slightly charming. He had a way about it, how his sleeves were rolled up and his tie was loose. Robe discarded and undeniably handsome- âWhat can I say? Itâs a talent of mine.âÂ
You couldnât help but chuckle, feeling more at ease as you continued to chat. The tension from earlier with your potions exam began to fade, replaced by a curiosity of learning who this Barty boy really was. It was a strange feeling, considering the reputation he had, but he seemed different here, away from the majority of the school, he was so gentle and sweet.Â
âSo, whatâs your recipe for Wiggenweld?â You asked, hopeful for a bit of help. You leaned in closer, the books between you momentarily forgotten.
âAlright, but you have to promise me something,â He whispered and leaned all that more closer, a mischievous glint in his eye. âYou canât tell anyone Iâm teaching you this. Itâs our secret.â
âDeal!â You nodded, your excitement bubbling over. You didnât care about the implications of keeping secrets; you were just grateful for the distraction and the chance to understand potions from a different perspective. Definitely not to keep talking to him, not at all, he was just so damned sweet.
âWell, I use this version of it.â He gestured to your test, âBut no Salamander blood. Just Horklump and Dittany.âÂ
âWhat?â You whispered in shock and he sent you a playful wink.Â
âTrust me, yeah?â He gestured to the pages. âYou just need to stew them for no longer than ten minutes. Stir it the first two- Potter?â
âYeah?â
âYou should be writing this down.â He teased and you quickly scrambled for your quill, cheeks flushed as he found you just staring.Â
You quickly scribbled down the details, heart racing as you focused on Bartyâs instructions. The way he leaned in, so close that you could catch a whiff of his cologne, made it hard to concentrate. You tried to tune out the little voice in your head that reminded you of his reputation; all you wanted was to absorb the knowledge he was sharing. Nothing more.
âOkay, so after youâve stewed the Horklump and Dittany, you need to add a pinch of powdered mint. It has to be powdered, if you add any fresh mint the juice will wind both of us in detention.â He continued, his voice low and steady, as if he were sharing a well-guarded secret. âBut don't tell anyone that. It's just to get the color Slug likes so much.â
You couldn't help but smile at his goofy antics. âWe?â
âHm?â
âWe'd end up in detention?â
He gave a chuckle. âCan't let you get in trouble for my secrets, can I? How could I live with myself?â
âWhat a gentleman.â You cooed and he gave a playfully solemn nod.Â
âTruly, I am.â
âI would totally let you take the fall for my antics.â You countered and he put a hand over his chest with a gasp. You giggled and he couldn't help but smile at your look.Â
âYou're much prettier than your brother.â He hummed and you paused, turning to furrow your eyebrows at him with a bright smile. Clearly, he had no shame in what he said.
âWatch what you say, my brother may disagree with that.âÂ
Barty smirked, clearly unfazed by the warning. He seemed so.. shameless. âLet him. Iâve dealt with worse than a jealous Potter before.â He leaned in a little closer, his tone playful, yet there was an undertone of seriousness in his eyes. âBesides, I would hate to disappoint him. But my type is more.. about your height, your hair color, your eyes. Have to say, the only thing wrong with you⊠your name.â
You felt your cheeks flush with warmth at his compliment, the boldness of his words making your heart race. Who was this guy? âOh really? Whatâs wrong with my name?â You asked, trying to keep your tone teasing, but the stutter in your tone betrayed you.
âPotter is a lovely name.â He hummed, leaning back in his chair with a smug grin. âBut if you are looking to try out something different, I have some ideas.â
âIs this you flirting, Crouch?âÂ
âCall me Barty. And if you have to question it I might just have to up my game.â He lit up like a child and your heart clenched hopelessly. He didn't even attempt to play coy with his new found attraction, you wondered hopelessly how many people had told this boy no. Certainly not enough.
Thank Merlin for that.
You couldn't help but laugh, trying to mask the fluttering in your chest. âWell, Barty, I donât know if youâre just charming or if this is some elaborate scheme to distract me from my disastrous Potions exam.â
He leaned in closer, resting his chin in his hand, eyes focused solely on you. âMaybe itâs a bit of both.â
You rolled your eyes, fighting to suppress a smile. âYouâre insufferable.â
âAnd youâre delightful,â He shot back without missing a beat. The intensity in his gaze made you feel a little dizzy, like you were the center of an exhilarating storm. Like you were worth all his attention.
You had only been speaking for an hour and it seems he made up his mind about you so quickly.
âOkay, Mr. Charming.â You said with a smirk, trying to regain some semblance of composure. âLetâs focus on Potions before you completely derail my study session.â
âFine, fine.â He chuckled, leaning back into his chair but not breaking eye contact. âWhat's your next question?â
You spent the rest of the day with Barty, drilling on about the exam and your potion questions, falling into an easy and familiar rhythm. Eventually, even when your questions were answered and the library was empty, you two stayed. Even as it grew dark outside and the only lights came from the candles on the table. You two keep droning into easy conversation.
âYou know.â Barty hummed. âThis isn't the first time we've met.â
âReally?â You asked, your head in your arms as you leaned on the table over your books. He nodded. âMhm. We met before, when we were younger. Before Hogwarts.â
âBefore Hogwarts?â You echoed, trying to piece together the fragments of your memory. âI donât remember meeting you before then. Are you sure?â
Barty chuckled, leaning back in his chair as he crossed his arms. âOh, Iâm sure. It was at Diagon Alley.â
Your eyebrows knitted together in concentration as you tried to recall any memory of him. âDiagon Alley? I donât remember that at all.â
âYeah, it was ages ago. You were with your family, and I was there with my mum.â He explained, with such a sweet smile that reached his eyes. âYou had just gotten your first wand. You were so excited, waving it around like you were already a pro. I was upset because my magic hadn't come in yet but you and your brothers came around the same time.â
You felt a spark of recognition at his words, completely baffled he would remember something so utterly small and insignificant to him. âI do remember being really excited! I think I accidentally turned my brotherâs hair blue for a week after that.â
Barty burst out laughing, the sound bright and infectious. âSee? You were a little troublemaker even back then.â
âHey, it was an accident!â You protested, laughing along with him. âI was just a kid.â
âStill, itâs good to know youâve always had a flair for the dramatic.â He muttered and bit his cheek. Suddenly so.. thoughtful and distant.Â
â... how did you remember that? I hardly remember it and it was the day I got my wand.â You have a small nervous laugh.
âYou really don't remember?â He laughed and you just furrowed your brow in confusion.
âWoah, I'm that forgettable?â He teased and laughed as your eyes widened in horror. âI'm only teasing.â
He rolled his jaw a bit and laid his head on the table to look you in the eyes. âI was throwing a fit, you know. I wanted a wand so badly. You walked past me on the street and you pointed your wand at me. You shouted; âtears be gone and magic be strong!â And just toddled away after your mother.â
Your jaw dropped a bit before you slowly covered your face in embarrassment. Giving a low groan as you began to laugh. âI don't remember that. But that's what my mum always told us when we got hurt. Said our magic would heal our owies.â
He chuckled and nodded. âI stopped crying. When I got my magic the next year I was sure it was your doing. I'm not surprised you don't remember me.â
âIt's not that you're forgettable-â
âHeavens no, not that. Just⊠you are always doing small things like that. You don't know how much it means to people.â
You flushed a bit at his statement and looked down, unable to keep his eyes anymore. âYou're exaggerating.âÂ
âI'm not. Everyone just adores you.â He mumbled and you shook your head.
âAnd everyone is scared of you.â You challenged. âNot everyone knows what they are talking about.âÂ
âThey are scared of me with good reason.â He corrected and you shook your head defiantly.Â
âYou're not scary.âÂ
âI can be.âÂ
âI'll believe it when I see it.â
âI guess you'll never believe it then.â
You tilted your head a bit and looked up to meet his eyes. He was smiling so softly, so sweet, eyes gentle and almost suffocating. âI would rather die than scare you.â
You stared at him, a bit stunned. Struggling to catch yourself but all you could muster was. âYou could never scare me.â
âGood.â He whispered in earnest with a nod of his head. âGood.â He smiled.
Before you both could continue talking, you heard the grand doors creek open, both of you looked up like deer in headlights. You saw Remus poke his head in and he smiled at you, before giving a grimace of a look at your company.Â
You stood up as you saw Remus leave, giving a low sigh. âSorry, I kept you here so late.â
âDon't worry about that.â He muttered as he began to help you pack up. âI'll put your books away for you.â
You gave him a surprised look before you furrowed your brow. âAre you not heading out as well?â
âNot now. I have a few assignments to look over.â He mumbled and your eyebrows raised in surprise.
âWha? Oh! Oh, Barty, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to distract you.â You whispered and he shook his head, chuckling.
âIt's alright, you can make it up to me.â He muttered and you nodded vigorously. âDistract me again? Tomorrow? Same seat?â
You were stunned for a moment before you slowly smiled to match his. âTime?â
âI'll be here all day.â
âUnderstood.â You smiled and gave him a small wave. âGoodnight, Barty.â
âGoodnight, Star.â
When you made your way out of the library and noticed James, Lily, Remus, Peter, and Sirius. You tilted your head a bit curiously when you saw James with the map.
âWhat's this about?â You hummed and James pointed at you like an accusatory child.
âNuh uh! You and Crouch? Gross! No!â
You furrowed your eyebrow in confusion and looked over to Sirius who was glaring at you. Peter looked nervous to meet your eyes.
âYou upset your brothers.â Remus muttered to you and you tilted your head.Â
âIt would seem so.â You mumbled back and Lily gave a little giggle. James didn't appreciate your mellow response.
âBambi that boy is no good for my little sister.â James huffed and you could have sworn if you rolled your eyes any harder they would fall from your head.Â
âOh Merlin, here we go.â Lily mumbled.
You crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow at James, trying to keep your expression calm. âYou mean the boy that helped me understand Potions better than I ever have? The same boy whoâs been nothing but nice to me? You guys really need to relax.â
Sirius chimed in, his tone teasing but serious. âNice? Junior? He's a walking red flag, loveâ
âAnd youâd know all about red flags, wouldnât you, Sirius?â You shot back, a smirk creeping onto your face. You couldnât help but needle him a bit, knowing full well his own history.
Lily laughed, trying to diffuse the tension. âCome on, you guys, let her have some fun! Sheâs old enough to make her own decisions.â
âLily!â James huffed and gestured to you. âShe's only 17.â
â18 in two months.â You put your hands on your hips as Remus smirked. â58 days.â
âRight on.â You mused and you and Remus shared a high five.
âWha- I- no! No, I don't like it!â James whined like a child. âHe's a Death Eater.â
That killed the fun chillingly fast. The hall was silent- in truth, no one knew anything about who was truly what. The only people you guys knew to be those monsters were the ones who claimed it. Like Mulciber, Avery, and even some of the other younger Slytherins.
The only evidence they would have to that would be the company Barty chose to keep.
âYou watch your mouth.â You snapped quickly at James who looked a bit caught off guard that his usually sweet playful sister was so serious. Your blood was boiling with anxiety and inching for you to back down, you just wouldn't. To be in the middle of a war and to use that word so freely?
âYou don't know what rumors like that can do to someone! And, I'll have you know, he is the sweetest boy I've ever talked to!â You snapped at him and his jaw dropped.Â
âNot you, Remus or Peter.â You reassured and they nodded in agreement.Â
âNot me.â Peter smiled at his friends and earned a smack from Sirius. Remus had the good sense not to say anything.
âYou're such a git, James! And I won't be letting you continue to dictate my social life!â You snapped and the second Sirius opened his mouth you glared at him down. âYou either greaser!âÂ
Remus snickered and you shook your head. âI'm going to my dorm!â
Lily scurried up to follow you, giving the boys a playful âhmph!â As she passed.
Remus was about to say something before Lily grabbed his arm and dragged him along. Leaving the three older Gryffindor's alone in the hall, baffled.
~~~
You stomped right up to your bed and slipped across it with a groan. Remus was next, mocking your childish stomps before he laid the proper way across your mattress, arms behind his head. You glared at him before Lily sat beside you and patted the side near her, coaxing you closer.
You sighed and sat up, wiggling closer.Â
âBaremius, huh?â She prodded and you nodded, leaning on your palms beside your knees. Her tone was always so soft and patient. She was always so⊠peaceful.Â
âIt's not like that. But James- ugh! He just gets on my nerves.â
âNot like that?â Remus spoke up from behind you two. âHe looked like he was about to kiss you.â
âI have that effect on people.â You cheeked, quickly trying to cover up your heating cheeks. âHe was helping me with potions. Nothing more.â
âWell, that's good.â Lily muttered and you half glared at her.
âGood?â
âI can't believe I'm about to say this.â She muttered. âI agree with your brother on this one.â
You gawked at her before you looked at at Remus who suddenly looked nervous.Â
âAnd you?â
âIn my defense, putting aside the rumors and.. his behaviors. He's a guy.â He shrugged and you gave a scandalized laugh.
âAnd you're not?â
âI'm a man.â He hummed and flexed playfully, showing off his arms and making you laugh, laying back and across his stomach. Lily rolled her eyes playfully and laid her head on his chest, looking at you with a soft smile.
âAnd in my defense, honey, I know him. He's friends with those horrid Slytherin boys andâŠâ She looked away for a moment. âSnape. I know you can't judge someone on their friends alone butâŠâ
âIt says a lot.â You muttered and slowly hid your face in Remusâs stomach. He lifted his hand to ruffle your hair and you gave a loud and annoyed groan, looking back at Lily. âDo you really think-â
âI haven't seen any proof.â Lily quickly hushed you. âBut just.. be careful, yeah? May want to keep him at arm's length.â
â...â You sighed and began to pick at the cables of Remusâs sweater, earning a smack from him. âI'll keep my distance.â
âThat's our girl.â She smiled and leaned in to kiss your temple, making you laugh.
âYou have to marry my brother now.â You insisted and Lily gave a snort.Â
âOh, look at this.â Lily mused and reached behind her, the second you lifted your head she flung a pillow at your face, leaving you to fall against Remusâs stomach. He let out a sound that resembled a balloon deflating and it left you and Lily giggling like fools.
You stared up at the ceiling as Remus and Lily began to chat aimlessly. You began to pick at your nails and pause. You wondered if there was any truth to it, the rumors and his actions.Â
âI would rather die than scare you.â
His words replayed in your head over and over. What did he mean by that? Was it just you? Was his persona an act? What made you the exception?
The way his head tilted and his eyes looked into yours, it was something so genuine. Scarily affectionate. You wondered if it really was just that conversation. That day you met and that comment you made to him about magic.
Was he really not used to such simple compassions?
âEarth to bambi.â Lily called out and you looked over at her with a curious look. She smiled.
âSo you won't get tangled up in him, yeah?â She prodded and you bit your cheek. You must have missed a lot.
âYeah.. I'll be careful.â You muttered and she smiled.
âGood. I'm off to my patrols.â She hummed and sat up, grabbing her books and saying her goodbyes.
Remus looked down at you to see that distant stare again. Giving a weak chuckle and patting, giving a hum. âWanna braid my hair?â
You sat up wordlessly and flopped on the pillow next to him. âActually.. Can you read to me?â
âYeah, yeah. Whatever you want, bambi.â He mused and grabbed one of the books from your coffee table. Shifting up so you could lay your head on his chest, listening as he started the same book he's already ready you a million times.
~~~
You kept your promise and you avoided Barty. Everything went back to the status quo. At least for the first few weeks.
James had let it go a week or so later and Sirius was still weary of leaving you alone for too long. Ever since he started staying at your house in year five, he had become just as hovering and doting as your brother. But with Lily and Remus as reinforcements they never pushed it too far.
Then came the full moon. Remus would never allow you too far from the Gryffindor towers the nights leading up to it. No one, really.Â
He would sooner see you in detention then letting you out of the dorms and especially not near the dark forest the night of the full moon. However, even if you couldn't help the night of, the very next morning no one could stop you from rushing down to the shrieking shack with breakfast and water for the boys.
It was never anything complicated, just a few biscuits and water before you all were lugged back for classes. This morning was no different. As you walked with the boys out of the shrieking shack and towards the school.Â
The sun was shining bright, casting warm rays across the forest floor as you made your way back toward the castle. The air was crisp, fresh from the nightâs chill, and you felt a sense of accomplishment in being there for your friends.Â
âThanks for this, lil Potter.â Remus mumbled, his voice still a bit hoarse but warm with affection as he took a sip of water. He was leaning heavily on his crutch that he still tried to insist he didn't need. The other boys were busy sharing their own sleepy banter, but you just smiled. âOf course, Moony. I wish you'd let me help more. I feel like I've become an animagus for nothing. I can still taste the mandrake leaf, I'll have you know.â
âI told you he wouldn't let you help like, five times!â James shouted ahead as he slipped back on his shirt. Remus strayed behind in his slowed step. Sirius shook his head.
âIf we had it our way, and you weren't so spoiled, you wouldn't be one at all.â He snarked in all his grumpy morning glory and you gave a sarcastic laugh.
âWhat got up your ass this morning? Hopefully not Remus in his state.âÂ
Remus began to choke on the water you had given them and Sirius gawked at you. James let out a laugh so loud it startled a few birds from the trees.
Remus rolled his neck before he nudged you a bit and gave a low groan. âIt will keep you safe. Just in case⊠you know, anything happens.âÂ
âNothing will happen.â You assured and he shrugged, always ready to believe he could hurt you guys at any second.
âYou never know.â
âYou'd never hurt me, Remus.â You whispered and locked your arm with his. He shook his head.
âMoony would.â He challenged and you shook your head back at him.
âNo, I mean, you wouldn't be able to. I am simply getting that good at self defense magic, didn't you hear our new professor? Could wipe the floor with em.â You cheeked and Remus gave you the most sour look you had ever seen, making you giggle.
âCan I?â Peter whispered from beside you and you handed him your water easily, giving a laugh when he threw it back and chucked the damn thing.
âThirsty?â
âWe shouldn't have drank.â He muttered and your jaw dropped.
âYou four drank? That has to be illegal. More- more so illegal than whatever we have been doing so far.â You scolded and Remus just gave you a cheeky smile. You rolled your eyes, looking off into the forest with a playful huff. Only for you to pause when you saw some bit of blue behind you guys.Â
You began to slow down more, furrowing your brow at the figure you swear you saw, just following you guys. Your arm untangled from Remusâs and he paused, looking back at you. Then, you saw cigarette smoke. You trailed back a bit more before you turned sharply.Â
âI think I dropped something! I'll catch up!â You called back before you hurried down the trail. Looking along the tree line. Only then did you spot exactly who you thought you saw.
Barty looked at you with wide eyes, from the thicket of the trees. You two locked in a staring contest for a few moments before you heard Peterâs voice call out to you.
âYou okay, Bambi?â He shouted and you quickly ran into the proper tree line. Grabbing Barty by his lapels and pushing his back against the nearest tree. He gave a small âoofâ as you took the cigarette from his mouth and tossed it on the ground, stomping it out.
He didn't react much besides rolling his head in annoyance and looking up at the leaves above you as you attempted to hide him. âWhat are you doing here?â You whisper hissed, assuming the worst.
He sucked his teeth a bit before looking down at you with a quirked eyebrow, âCan't take a morning stroll?â
âWere you following me?â You asked incredulously, stepping back from him as he fixed his uniform. âNot.. initially.âÂ
âYo! Bambi, you alright?â Sirius called down and you pursed your lips, giving Barry a once over. He looked.. sad. Almost bored. Nothing like the playful boy in the library.
âUhm⊠yes. Yes!â You shouted back. âWardrobe malfunction! I have a spell for it, just run ahead!â
There was a long pause before Remus shouted back. âAlright!â
As you listened to the boyâs voices finally fade out into the background you slipped your hands in your robe pockets.Â
âWhy are you out here?â You finally asked and he looked down, rubbing the back of his neck. He walked over to a well worn log and sat down. Looking back to the path one more time you finally sat by him, hugging your cold knees.Â
He took off his robe and threw it over your lap. Before you could protest he took a letter from his pocket and handed it over to you. Taking out a box of smokes and starting another one.
You looked over the letter carefully, the envelope was beige but it had a blue stamp. Carefully, you unfolded it.
Bartemius,
I find it utterly disheartening that I must waste my precious time addressing your incessant foolishness yet again. Your childish antics are a stain on our family name, and quite frankly, I am beyond exhausted by your inability to grasp the gravity of the situation. Another fight within a week? Pathetic.
How dare you presume to send a personal letter to my office as if your juvenile escapades warrant my attention? If I sought updates on your disgraceful behavior, I would have asked your mother- though I suspect she has long since learned to ignore your antics. It astounds me that you continue to associate with those beneath you, dragging my name through the mud and jeopardizing the reputation I have painstakingly built in the ministry.
Your conduct is an embarrassment, not just to yourself but to me and our entire lineage. I expect to see a marked improvement in your behavior, though I have little hope that you possess the maturity to effect any real change. If you cannot rise above your base instincts, you will remain nothing but a disappointment. Do not insult me further with your incompetence.Â
You felt your heart clench tighter with each line you read. It was like someone had cut out the devil's tongue and used his linguistics to verbally lash the pages, and the lack of warmth in the words left you feeling hollow. It was hard to reconcile the boy youâd just been speaking with- the charming, playful Barty- with the boy described in this letter.Â
Let alone a boy as sweet as Barty could be subject to this. Your thumbs began to crease the page the tighter you held it.
You knew you were lucky to have a father like yours. He would never speak down to you like this, he was the one who begged you to write. About anything and everything.Â
âI wanted him to know I got all Oâs.â He muttered, gesturing to the letter. You looked over to him in surprise as he tightened his jaw but kept his expression unreadable. âShould of known it wouldn't have impressed him.â
âBartyâŠâ You whispered, looking up at him with concern etched across your features. You felt your eyes begin to sting and your vision blur. He was staring off into the distance, tense as he took a deep drag of the cigarette. How could someone be so cruel to him?
You schooled your expression, giving a sniff or two as you used your sleeve to dry your tears. Then, your turned to face him fully, pressing the letter firm against your lap.
âYou impressed me.â You declared in a stern tone. He furrowed his brow and looked at you curiously. You kept a straight face. âIt's impressive, Barty. It's impressive and.. I'm impressed.â
He gave a weak, almost scandalized laugh before he bit his cheek, trying to hide a smile. âYou are?â
âMhm.â You nodded earnestly and he gave a low chuckle as you began to sniff again to try and keep your tears back.
âSo.. is that why you'd been avoiding me?â He mused and your shoulders sank a bit. You have a deep sigh and hugged your knees. Burying your face in his robe still draped over your legs.
There was a moment of pause before you finally gave in. âYou're not.. you're not a bad person. I don't think you are.â You whispered. âBut my brother does. And his friends.â
âSo what?â He asked softly, no malice in his tone just genuine curiosity.Â
You hesitated, the weight of your words hanging in the air. âSo... I donât want to get caught up in whatever is brewing around you. I know there's something. They care about me, and I care about them. I canât just ignore it. And Lily she's...â
Bartyâs expression shifted slightly, his brow furrowing as he considered your words. âYou think Iâm dangerous?â
âI think you have a reputation.â You countered, trying to keep your tone neutral even as your voice wavered. âAnd itâs not just who you hang around with. Itâs the way people talk about you- like youâre some kind of monster. I've.. heard things. What you've done, I mean.â
He chuckled softly, but the humor didnât reach his eyes. âI suppose Iâve earned that.â He admitted. âBut Iâm not dangerous. Not to you.â
You felt a pang of something- so heavy and tight in your chest at the way he said it. There was an honesty in his voice that made you hesitate, and for a moment, you saw not just the boy with the reputation, but someone who seemed genuinely weary of the way others perceived him. No.
The way you perceived him. The hypothetical danger he posed to you. He was more concerned with how you felt about him then anyone else.
âThen why do you hang around with them?â You asked, trying to understand. âYou could easily distance yourself from them, you know. They are.. they are monsters, you know what they did to Mary and Lily. They are important to me.â
Barty shrugged, a nonchalant gesture that didnât quite match the tension in his expression. âTheyâre... my friends. They understand the game. Itâs easier to be with those who donât expect me to be anything other than what I am.â
âBut that's not fair.â You huffed boldly. âThat's not fair to me. I won't pick between anyone and my friends because my answer will be my friends.â
âYeah..â Barty took another long drag of his cigarette. âMe too.â
The weight of his words hung in the air between you two, a heavy silence stretching out as you both considered the implications. You had to let yourself realize that with a father like his⊠his friends were truly all he had. You watched as he exhaled a cloud of smoke, the tendrils swirling in the sunlight filtering through the trees. His face was partially shadowed, but you could see the conflict in his eyes- caught between the reputation he had and the reputation his friends built.
âSo, youâre saying that youâd rather be with them, even if it puts you in a bad light?â You asked, your brows furrowing in concern. âIs that really worth it?â
Barty leaned back against the tree, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. âNot all of us can be Sirius Black.â He chuckled dark and your lip twitched. âNot all of us have a Potter waiting to save us and I'm not leaving Regulus alone either.â
You furrowed your brow at him and he just shrugged. âWhy didn't Regulus come along?â You whispered softly and he shook his head.
âWrong question star. It's not my job to question him. I'm the one who's there for him.âÂ
You stared at him for a moment longer and Barty met your eyes. It was like a stalemate for a good few minutes.
At that moment, you wondered if the houses were truly picked properly. Because you had never known anyone braver and more loyal than Bartemius Crouch Junior. You gave a low sigh and then smiled at him. He slowly returned it and your smile only widened.
Giving a small giggle he tossed his finished cigarette and held his hand out to you. You took it and he pulled you up, tossing his robe over his arm.
âYou should run off now, yeah? Before your brother finds me defacing his sister's reputation.â
You shook your head with a bitter laugh. Taking a moment to appreciate him up close. Eventually, you gave in, getting on your toes and giving him a small kiss on the cheek. One that seemed to stun him.
âYou really are remarkable, Barty.â You whispered and he couldn't hide his goofy and bright smile from you.Â
âAnd you, Star Potter, are a beautiful experience, everytime.â He said, his voice low and earnest, a spark of genuine warmth in his gaze. You felt your heart flutter at his compliment, and for a moment, it was as if the world outside faded away, leaving just the two of you in this small pocket of time.
âNow, run along.â He whispered, his tone teasing as he stepped back, the playful glint returning to his eyes. âDonât let them catch you talking to me, or theyâll think Iâm corrupting you.â
You laughed, shaking your head as you turned to walk back toward the castle. âYou wish you were that lucky!â You called over your shoulder, feeling lighter than you had in days.
He watched you go with a small sigh. Shamelessly he put the robe to his face he could smell the faintest linger of your perfume. His eyes closing tight, as the scent reminded him you were real.Â
âMerlin, I really do.â
~~~
Sneaking around was your brotherâs bread and butter, not yours.Â
But you found it harder and harder to really stay away from Barty. His persistence didn't help.
Small things started happening. Like chocolates began to appear in your books, flowers showing up on your desk, and other small things that were undeniably Barty. You couldn't get away from him. Whether it was the shared glances or the way he looked at you with an intensity that made your heart race, it was undeniable how much you were starting to fall for him.
Youâd see him in the halls between classes, his eyes catching yours briefly before he flashed that charming smile. Sometimes heâd join you at the library, his presence both comforting and slightly thrilling. Each time felt like a secret shared in the quiet corners of Hogwarts, a world apart from the repetitive life of your friends. Not that you didn't love them- you adored them.Â
But the attention was nice.
âI got an Outstanding!â Lily sang as she held up her test, smiling ear to ear. James gave a wolf whistle to make Lily laugh, earning a shove for it.Â
Sirius looked at his parchment and gave a low whistle before carefully setting it back down, making the group laugh.
âThat bad?â You cooed and Sirius smirked at you.
âYeah? And what did you get, bambi?â
You bit your cheek and looked down at your parchment. Slowly turning it over with one eye closed, only to give a delighted gasp. âHa! Outstanding!âÂ
You flashed the paper to the group and Remus gave a laugh, Sirius playfully glared at you and snatched the paper away from you. âHorseradish! You cheated.â He insisted and you laughed.
âI did not cheat!â You protested, trying to snatch your parchment back. âI just studied really hard!â
âSure, sure,â Sirius said, grinning as he held it just out of your reach. âWhatâs your secret? Did you bribe Slughorn?â
âThat didn't cross my mind, actually.â You cheeked, and Remus clicked his tongue with a playful shake of his head. âDisappointed.â
Sirius laughed, holding your parchment a little higher. âYou could have had him eating out of your hand with some chocolate frogs, you know.â
âNext time, Iâll be sure to bring him a whole box.â You shot back with a grin, finally managing to snatch your parchment back.
âLook at my little sister!â James piped up, pinching your cheeks. âI knew you had brains in there somewhere!â
âSod off!â You huffed and he just laughed, letting you go.
You rolled your eyes, but couldnât help but smile at the actual cause of the O. As your brother and everyone began to get back to their idle chatter, you looked across the hall to the RavenClaw table, but you didn't see him. As your eyes drifted across the hall to the Slytherin table, you found your eyes trapped by a pair of stormy gray ones. Regulus Black simply nodded to you and looked down.
You wondered if he knew.
You pouted a bit before you looked back to the group. âI think I'll spend my free period at the library.âÂ
âAwe, booo.â Peter called across the table.
âCome on, Bambi, donât be a hermit!â James chimed in, trying to coax you back into the conversation. âYou just got an Outstanding! Celebrate a little, you'll turn into my Evans!â
Lily gave a scoff.
âYeah, you deserve a break.â Sirius added, leaning back in his chair with an exaggerated sigh. âHow about we all go to Hogsmeade this weekend? A little fun to reward your hard work?â
You hesitated, torn between the prospect of hanging out with your friends and the nagging feeling that you wanted to see Barty again. âI would like to. But I really should review.â
âCome on, bambi!â Sirius pleaded, leaning forward with that infamous grin of his. âYou can study later! Hogsmeade is a perfect way to unwind. Plus, weâre all going together. Itâll be fun!â
You bit your lip, glancing toward the Ravenclaw table again, half-hoping to see Bartyâs unmistakable figure. He still wasnât there. âI really should-â
âShould what?â James interjected, crossing his arms in an exaggerated manner. âYour grades wonât crumble if you take one break. Besides, youâve been studying like a madwoman. You deserve a little fun. We haven't really hung out since you started this new study obsession.â
âYeah! Whatâs the point of getting good marks if you canât enjoy yourself?â Sirius chimed in.Â
You sighed, biting your cheek. While you loved your friends and cherished the time spent with them, the thought of Barty lingered in your mind. âI just think I can study more effectively if I focus on Potions right now.â
âCome onâ, you canât keep avoiding social interactions forever!â Sirius exclaimed dramatically. âYouâll turn into a hermit! Just imagine it: âBambi, the hermit of Hogwartsâ- it has a nice ring to it, actually.â He mumbled.
You giggled despite yourself, but the thought of Barty won over. âSorry boys.â
âI think it's a good idea.â Lily hummed and you felt a bit guilty. Giving a firm nod and gathering your things and hurrying out of the hall before they could continue to protest.Â
The soft breeze from outside pushed back your hair a bit as you walked. The smell of the great hall flickered out and was soon replaced by the not entirely pleasant dampness of the dungeons. You weren't walking down the halls for long before you were suddenly yanked into a broom closet so fast you squealed.
Quickly a hand came over your mouth and you- like a normal person would- freaked out. Slamming your head back into the unseen attackerâs face. You heard a groan as he let go and spun around, only to stare at Barty with wide eyes. His hand covering his bruising nose and smiling at you.
âYou scared the daylights out of me!â You scolded quickly, pushing away your embarrassment and annoyance with him- especially since he got such a strong reaction out of you. He just smiled and chuckled at you.Â
âSorry, sorry.â He muttered. He had such a pretty smile, even when he was being an absolute moron. Oh, you owe Lily so many apologies. His hands slipped into his pockets as his shaggy hair fell a bit over his face.Â
âJust had to see you.â He whispered and you nodded.
âThere are better what's to get a girlâs attention.â You muttered and he couldn't stop smiling at you. âDoes it still hurt?â
You muttered softly and he nodded, leaning down a bit to your height. You smirked and raised your finger as if it was your wand. ââtears be gone and magic be strong.â You whispered and he gave a low hum.
âYou knowâŠâ
âHm?â
âI'm not a kid anymore.â He chuckled and you flushed a bit, rolling your eyes.Â
âYou could've had me fooled. What do you want me to do? Don't pull girls into a closet- no, don't pull anyone into broom closets.â You scolded and he just laughed, again, the most beautiful sound you'd heard all day.
âHow about you kiss it better?â He pushed and you gave a snort.Â
âSo you are a kid?â
âCome on.â He whined and gave you his best puppy dog eyes. âYou hurt me, star.â
You held back a laugh, though the urge to playfully shove him away was strong. Instead, you gently cupped his face, watching his expression soften as you leaned in, pressing a quick, light kiss to his nose.
He closed his eyes, humming contentedly at the contact. âAgain.â He murmured, barely opening his eyes.
âNeedy.â You teased, but obliged, giving him another small kiss. He muttered the same request, and you rolled your eyes, leaning in to pepper his nose with a flurry of quick kisses, each one lighter and faster than the last.
But then, just as your last kiss hovered, he lifted his chin, guiding your lips to his. You gasped softly at the unexpected move, but he only pulled you closer, hands shifting from your hips to your waist, deepening the kiss. You couldnât help but smile against his mouth, warmth flooding through you as you melted into him.
âCheeky.â You murmured against his lips.
You felt the gentle rumble of his laughter as he held you tighter, closing every bit of space between you until it felt like youâd always belonged there, tangled in his arms, with nothing left between you but the sound of his heart beating against yours.
âCongratulations on potions.â He mumbled and he stepped a bit closer to you. Leaning down to press a soft kiss to your temple.
You giggled and slipped your hands up his arms, grabbing his biceps and your laughter getting louder as his kisses became a bit more sloppy and messy. From your temple to your cheek to your neck. Devolving you both into laughter and loving kisses.
âBarty?â You whispered and he kissed from where his lips we pressed to your ear.Â
âMhm?â
âYou should kiss my lips again.â
He paused and slowly his lips curled up into a smirk against your neck. âAnything you want, star.âÂ
He slowly kissed a trail up your neck, to your chin, to you cheek. You were growing a bit impatient, but you couldn't bring yourself to be mad about it. It was slow and sweet. The opposite of him.
The anticipation built with each gentle kiss, and when Barty finally pressed his lips to yours, nothing else mattered. The kiss was everything you hoped it would be; soft, warm, and filled with all the excitement from the sneaking around you had been doing.
You both pulled back slightly, your foreheads resting against each other as you shared a quiet moment, the sound of your mingled laughter still lingering in the air. He was warm, he always was. Just quiet and content. "I've been wanting to do that for a while.â Barty admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.
You smiled, feeling a warmth spread through you at his confession. "Me too."
After a moment of pause, Bart slipped his hands out of his pockets and around your waist. You slowly opened your eyes to see he was staring at you so obviously. So much affection and.. pain in his eyes. Carefully your reached up from his shoulders to tangle in his hair.Â
âBaby.â You cooed, watching as the black pupils of his eyes grew twice their size.Â
âI love when you call me that.â He whispered and kissed you again. This time, with a bit more hunger for it.Â
The intensity of the kiss took you by surprise, yet it felt natural, as if this was where you were always meant to be. Barty's arms tightened around you, pulling you closer, as if trying to erase any lingering distance between you. The world outside the broom closet faded away, leaving just the two of you in this perfect, private moment. His lips moved against yours with a fervor that mirrored the emotions you'd both been holding back for so long.
When you finally broke apart, both of you slightly breathless, Barty rested his forehead against yours again. "I need to know.â He whispered. âYou're my girl, yeah?â
âYours.â You confirmed without hesitation. âYour girl.â
Barty's eyes softened, and a relieved smile spread across his face, as if the weight of uncertainty had been lifted. You hadn't realized that for these past few weeks, despite all the flirting and stray touches, the meetings and secret rendezvous you'd never confirmed what felt so obvious to you.
"Good.â He murmured, brushing his thumb gently across your cheek. "Good.â
The two of you stood there, wrapped in each other's arms, savoring the stillness and the shared understanding that had only deepened. It was rare to find moments like these at Hogwarts, where every day was bustling with activity and noise, but here, in the quiet confines of the broom closet, you had carved out your own little haven.
"We should probably get back before they start wondering where we are.â You whispered reluctantly, knowing that duty and friendships couldn't be ignored forever. If Remus or anyone went looking in the library for you it was over, Merlin if they pulled out that map they loved to use on you so much you were done for.
Barty nodded, though he made no move to let you go just yet. "I suppose. But weâll have more time together soon, right?"
"Definitely.â You assured him, smiling as you reluctantly stepped back, already anticipating the next secret meeting, the next shared glance across the crowded halls.
As you both emerged from the broom closet, the world seemed a little brighter, the halls a little more welcoming. And as you parted ways with a lingering look, you knew this was just the beginning of something wonderful.
~~~
You never thought Barty was capable of restraint- his affections for you were never a secret. He had been bold from the start, confessing his feelings on your first meeting as if it was the most natural thing in the world. You assumed he couldnât hold back if he tried. But the truth was, you had underestimated him completely.
You were a Potter, you were no stranger to a love that burrowed into your heart like a bug. James was a prime example, but he had nothing on your father. You knew love like you knew the sunrise, Potters were love. That still didn't prepare you for the love of Barty Crouch Junior.
The moment you became âBartyâs girl,â subtle gestures turned into grand, unrelenting declarations. Flowers appeared on your bedside in ornate bouquets, chocolates transformed into extravagant assortments, and he began slipping you old notes from his classes, annotated with messages he thought youâd enjoy. Sometimes, youâd find an anonymous love letter tucked between the pages of your books, though you always recognized his handwriting. It was a whirlwind of adoration that grew so excessive even your friends couldnât ignore it.
The rumor spread quickly: you had a secret admirer. A very devoted one.
What started as stolen glances in the hallways and whispered words in broom closets evolved into something deeper. He became a constant, pulling you into hidden spaces where heâd kiss you like you were the only real thing in his world. His kisses were desperate, his hands always seeking some part of you to hold, as if he feared you might slip through his fingers.
Your world shrank to accommodate him. It was thrilling, yes, but also overwhelming. Each secret meeting was marked by a mix of exhilaration and dread that only lended to thrive in you, every touch, every breathless encounter behind closed doors, reminded you how deeply tangled you were becoming in each other. It was intoxicating and dangerous, like standing too close to a fire.
When he looked at you, it was like he was trying to memorize your every detail, like you were his only source of light.Â
âYou donât know what you do to me,â He murmured one night, his voice rough as he pressed his forehead against yours. His hands cupped your face, thumbs brushing the curve of your jaw as his eyes searched yours with raw intensity. âYouâre everything Iâve ever wanted. Iâd burn the whole world down if it meant keeping you.â
You shivered, his words igniting a heat in your chest. âBartyâŠâ
His lips crashed against yours, swallowing the rest of your words. The kiss was frantic, a collision of need and longing, his fingers threading through your hair as he pulled you closer, like he couldnât get enough of you. Your knees buckled slightly, but his arm wrapped around your waist, steadying you, grounding you.Â
âYouâre mine,â He whispered against your lips, his voice low and fervent. âSay it.â
âIâm yours.â You breathed, the words spilling out before you could stop them. And it was true- somehow, heâd claimed parts of you you didnât even know existed. You couldn't even fathom were your breath started and his ended.Â
He sought you out in the quiet moments, trailing his fingertips down your arm when no one was looking, writing your name in the margins of his notes when he thought you wouldnât see. You began to realize that to him, you werenât just a girl he fancied; you were his anchor, his sanctuary in a world that seemed determined to tear him apart. He was becoming yours too.
Your eyes searched for him in every room. The way he flashed you that sickeningly slick smirk when he caught you staring. How he would follow you out of any room you happened to share, just to steal you away from whatever task he deemed not more important then his time with you. Shushing you in empty corridors as his hands found a spot just above your skirt. Ruffling your tie in slight frustration and marking skin no one would see but him. All while looking at you like you were his last salvation.
~~~
The fire crackled in the hearth as you sat cross-legged on your bed, your Transfiguration book open in front of you. Lily sat at your desk, rifling through her notes, while Remus lounged on your bed, one arm thrown casually over the back of a pillow. The three of you had settled in for a relaxed study session, but conversation had drifted away from studies.
"So, are we ever going to find out who it is that's got you all flustered lately?" Remus asked with a teasing grin, nudging your ankle with his foot. Lily looked up from her notes, her eyebrows raising with interest.
"Oh, Remus, give her a break," Lily sighed with a small smile, though you could see the curiosity twinkling in her green eyes. "Sheâll tell us when sheâs ready."
You felt warmth rise to your cheeks, and you gave Remus a playful kick back. "Youâre both ridiculous," you said, trying to keep your tone light. "Thereâs no one."
Remus rolled his eyes, his smile widening. "Sure, and I'm the Minister of Magic."
You shook your head, flipping open your Transfiguration book to avoid his gaze. "Fascinating. The Minister and all- and you can't even tell me which wand motion is the proper technique to transfigure my desk. Study don't pry into my very uninteresting love life."
"Uninteresting, huh?" Lily asked, her voice laced with skepticism. "I donât know, those flowers youâve been getting seem pretty interesting to me."
You opened your mouth to retort when something caught your eye; a folded piece of parchment, carefully tucked between the pages of your book. You furrowed your brow as you pulled it out, unfolding it to see the familiar slanted handwriting of Barty.
Meet me in my dorm. Iâve got something to show you.
Your heart skipped a beat, and you quickly folded the note, trying to suppress the smile threatening to spread across your face. You slipped the parchment under your pillow, feeling both Remusâ and Lilyâs eyes on you.
"Whatâs that?" Remus asked, his smirk only growing.
"Nothing," you said quickly, giving them both a bright smile. "Just a reminder for myself."
Lily narrowed her eyes playfully, clearly not buying it, but she didnât push. "Alright, fine," she said, glancing at the clock on your bedside table. "But I think I should be getting back to my own dorm soon. I promised James I'd meet him."
You nodded, swinging your legs off the bed. "Yeah, I should⊠um, Iâll be back in a bit."
Remus gave you a knowing look but didnât say anything as you grabbed your robe and made your way towards the door, feeling the folded note burning against your skin. You slipped out of the room, trying to keep your excitement in check as you made your way through the castle.
Not long after you left, James appeared in the doorway, his hair as untidy as ever and a bright smile lighting up his face. "There you are, Evans," he said, striding into the room without knocking. "Ready to go?"
Lily stood, gathering her notes, but before she could respond, Jamesâ eyes flickered to your bed, where the edge of the note youâd tucked under your pillow peeked out. His eyes narrowed slightly, and with the mischievous curiosity that had always been a part of him, he reached over and pulled it out.
"Whatâs this, then?" James asked, more to himself than anyone else.
Lily turned, her eyes widening as she caught sight of the note. "James, put that back. It's not yours."
But James had already unfolded it, his eyes scanning the words. His playful smile faltered slightly, his brow furrowing as he read the message. â... she's meeting someone. At night.â
Remus wasn't proud of himself, but he felt his body jolt forward at the idea. His brow furrowing as he looked at the handwriting.Â
âSurely not.â Lily muttered skeptical, walking closer and pouting. âJames, whose handwriting is that?â
âDon't know.â He mumbled before he glanced at Remus who grimaced a bit. âI know how to find out.â
~~~
The sun had long since set, plunging the room into shadow. The lone candle on the nightstand burned low, its golden light flickering uncertainly across the walls, casting fleeting glimpses of the intimacy shared within. You lay beside Barty on his narrow bed, his body curled protectively around yours. His hand cradled your cheek, thumb tracing gentle lines as if memorizing your face. His other hand gripped your waist, not possessively but securely, as though grounding himself in the reality of your presence.
His green eyes, bright and intent, held yours with a tenderness so consuming it made your chest ache. The world outside seemed to vanish in this space- no war, no sides, no betrayals. Just the boy you loved, smiling softly at you like you were the only thing keeping him alive.
"What are you smiling about?" You teased, brushing your nose against his, your fingers weaving through the hair at the nape of his neck. He sighed at the touch, his eyes fluttering closed briefly before fixing on you again, filled with the kind of raw vulnerability he showed to no one else.
This was your Barty. The boy who could switch so drastically between needing every bit of your skin against his own, and loving you like you were a fragile truth.
"Just you." He murmured, his voice thick with affection, his smile deepening. "Thinking about how breath taking you look right now.."
Your heart swelled at his words, at the way he looked at you as if you were his last breath. You pressed your lips to his, slow and soft, letting the warmth of his embrace spread through you. His arms tightened around you, his desperation seeping through the way he held you close, as though he feared you might disappear.Â
But even in this fragile moment, reality intruded. Your lips trailed down his jaw, leaving a line of soft kisses along his neck. As your hand slipped beneath the sleeve of his shirt, your fingers brushed against something rough, foreign. You froze, your heart stuttering as your fingertips traced the unfamiliar texture.
"Barty, whatâs this?" You asked, pulling back slightly, your brow furrowing as dread began to creep into your chest. âDid you get a new tattoo?â
His entire body went rigid. His eyes snapped open, the warmth in them replaced by something colder, darker. His hand shot to your wrist, gripping it with startling intensity, though his touch remained gentle. âItâs nothing.â He said- no, demanded quickly, but his voice cracked, and his gaze flickered away. The tension in his jaw, the way he avoided your eyes. It betrayed him.
He couldn't hide from you. Not after he'd given you every way to see him.
"Barty.â You pressed, your voice trembling now. "Show me."
For a long moment, he didnât move, his jaw clenched so tightly you could see the faint twitch of muscle. His eyes darted to yours, filled with a fear so raw it sent a chill through you. Slowly, with trembling hands, he rolled up his sleeve.
The world seemed to stop.
Etched into his pale skin, dark and stark against the flickering candlelight, was the unmistakable mark of the Death Eaters. Your breath hitched, the air in the room turning ice cold as you stared at the symbol that now defined him. The room, once warm and safe, felt suffocating, as though the walls were closing in around you.
"No.â You whispered, shaking your head, your voice breaking as tears stung your eyes. "No, Barty, tell me this isnât real. Tell me itâs a joke. Please."Â
He reached for you, his expression desperate, pleading. "Itâs not what you think.â He whispered, his voice cracking under the weight of his own guilt. "Please, just listen- fuck, let me explain."
"Explain?" You choked, the word a bitter laugh as you scrambled to sit up, the sheets tangling around your legs. âYouâre one of them, Barty. A Death Eater. The people who are trying to kill my brother, who would destroy Lily, who hate everything I stand for. How could you? How could you do this?â
He flinched as if youâd struck him, his hands trembling as he reached for you again. âI did it for them,â he said, his voice raw with emotion. âFor Regulus. For Evan. They needed me- I had to protect them.â
Your laughter came out hollow, bitter. âProtect them? What about me, Barty? What about us? Did you think of me when you let that thing be branded onto your skin? Did you think about what it would mean? About the promises we made?â
âI love you.â He pleaded, his voice breaking on the words. His eyes, wide and glistening with unshed tears, bore into yours, his desperation bleeding through every syllable. âI love you more than anything in this world. I did this for us; for you. I thought I could keep you safe.â
You shook your head, your chest tight, every word he spoke only twisting the knife in your heart. âSafe? You think this is keeping me safe? Barty, youâve tied yourself to the very people who want to destroy me, my family, my friends. Dorcas got out. She didnât need to join them. She did it for Marlene! You had a choice, Barty. You could have chosen me.â
âDonât do this.â He begged, his voice trembling as he sank to his knees in front of you, his hands clutching at yours. âPlease, donât leave me. I canât lose you. I canât- I wonât survive it. Youâre all I have.â
His raw vulnerability shattered something in you, the way he looked at you like you were the only thing anchoring him to humanity. But even that couldnât change the mark on his arm, the choices he had made. You tore your hands from his grasp, stepping back as tears streamed down your face.
âI canât do this.â You whispered, wrapping your arms around yourself as if to hold yourself together. âI canât be with someone whoâs made that choice. Picking that side. Not when it means standing against everything I believe in. I love you, Barty, but thisâŠâ Your voice broke. âThis isnât love. Not when it costs so much.â
His face crumpled, his body trembling as he clung to the edge of the bed like it was the only thing holding him up. âYou are my side,â he said, his voice barely above a whisper. âYouâre everything to me. Without you, Iâm nothing. Darling, please. You have to trust me.â
Your heart shattered at his words, but you couldnât stay. You couldnât let your love for him blind you to the truth of what he had become. Turning away, you moved toward the door, each step feeling like a physical wound.
âPlease.â He whispered one last time, his voice so broken it nearly stopped you in your tracks. âPlease donât leave me. Iâll fix it. I'll fix us, darling, my love.â
You hesitated, your hand on the doorknob, tears blurring your vision. âIâm sorry, Barty,â you whispered, your voice trembling with grief. âBut youâve chosen a side. And it isnât mine.â
With that, you stepped out of the room, the soft click of the door behind you sealing the final break between you. Each step down the hallway felt like walking through fire, the ache in your chest consuming you. You pressed a hand to your mouth to stifle a sob, the image of him- broken, desperate, lost- burned into your mind.
But you kept walking, because if you turned back, you knew youâd never leave. And that was the one thing you couldnât allow.Â
Not when his love came with a price you could no longer bear to pay.
~~~
It was well past curfew when you stumbled back into the dormitory, your body heavy with exhaustion and your heart feeling as though it had been shattered into pieces too small to ever put back together. Every step echoed hollowly in the silent hallways, the sound swallowed by the crushing weight in your chest. You didnât care about the risk of being caught; the only thing propelling you forward was the desperate need to collapse, to sink into the safety of your bed where the world couldnât reach you.Â
But the sight that greeted you when you pushed open the door wasnât the solitude you craved.
James stood with the Marauder's Map clutched tightly in his hand, his face flushed with a mix of anger and worry that twisted painfully at the sight of you. Sirius paced like a caged animal, his jaw tight, his dark eyes alight with barely restrained frustration. Remus sat perched on the edge of your bed, his brow furrowed with concern, while Lily lingered by the desk, her green eyes soft and filled with sympathy. Peter, as always, quiet. Hovering in the background.
"There you are!" James's voice rang out, sharp and filled with barely contained emotion. The sound made you flinch, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. He crossed the space between you in two quick strides, holding up the map like a damning piece of evidence. âYou want to tell me what the hell you were doing in the Ravenclaw dorms? Or should I save you the trouble? I know who you were with.â
The accusation in his voice hit like a physical blow. You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came. The fight you would usually summon to deflect his concern- the sarcasm or sharp retorts; was gone. It had crumbled under the weight of the truth you could no longer avoid. Your shoulders slumped, the tears you had tried so desperately to hold back beginning to blur your vision.
âI donât have to explain myself to you, James.â You muttered, though your voice was a faint shadow of its usual strength. It trembled, hollow and lifeless, like it no longer belonged to you.
James scoffed, his frustration boiling over. "Donât have to explain? Youâve been sneaking around with him! Donât you see what he is?â His voice cracked, the anger giving way to something far more fragile. "Heâs one of them, isnât he? A bloody Death Eater.â
His words were a knife twisting in your chest. You closed your eyes, letting out a shaky breath, your body trembling under the weight of his accusation. But you didnât deny it. You couldnât. Because James was right. He had been right all along.Â
"Say something!" Siriusâs voice cut through the silence, raw and desperate. He stepped closer, his fists clenched tightly at his sides, his pacing halted by his need for answers. His sharp gaze burned into you, searching for some explanation, some reassurance that you hadnât fallen so deeply into something so dangerous. He couldn't bare to see you follow, not after losing Regulus to it. âAnything.â
Your lips parted, but the words caught in your throat. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you whispered, âYou were right.â The words came out broken, each one heavier than the last. âYou were both right⊠about everything.â
The room fell into stunned silence, the weight of your admission pressing down on everyone. Jamesâs expression crumbled, his anger dissolving into a mix of heartbreak and understanding. He moved toward you, his voice soft and filled with pain. âOh, sweetheartâŠâ He murmured, reaching for you.
That was all it took. The dam inside you broke, and a sob tore its way out of your chest. James pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as your knees buckled beneath you. You clung to him, your sobs muffled against his robes, your whole body trembling.
âI thought he loved me.â You choked out, the words spilling from your lips in between gasps for breath. âI thought- he said he loved me. But he lied. He lied to me.â
Jamesâs arms tightened around you, his own tears slipping silently down his face. âI know,â he whispered, his voice trembling. âI know, Bambi. Iâm so sorry.â
Sirius stepped forward then, his anger replaced by an aching sadness. His hand rested on your back, tentative at first, before he let out a shaky breath. âWe were only trying to protect you,â he murmured, his voice hoarse. âWe didnât want this for you. We didnât want you to get hurt.â
Lily knelt beside you, her warm hand brushing against your arm as she looked up at you, her eyes filled with sympathy. âWeâre here now,â she said gently. âYou donât have to go through this alone. Weâve got you.â
You turned to her, your tear-streaked face trembling as you met her gaze. âI donât know what to do now,â you admitted, your voice small and broken.
Remus, silent until now, stepped closer and placed a hand on your shoulder. His touch was steady, grounding. âYou take it one step at a time,â he said softly, his calm voice a lifeline. âJust breathe for me. Ten in, ten out. Weâll figure it out together.â
You nodded, trying to follow his guidance, your breaths still shaky but slowing little by little. The sobs subsided, leaving you with a hollow ache in your chest that felt impossibly heavy.Â
âCome on.â He whispered, his voice filled with a protective warmth. âLetâs get you into bed. You donât have to think about anything else tonight.â
You nodded with a distant look, letting him coax you into your bed. You felt like a child.
âJamie, let's head back to the dorms, yeah?â Lily said quietly, her eyes flicking to James, who stood near the foot of your bed, still looking worried.Â
âBut..â James started, staring at your slightly trembling form, reluctant to leave you like this. He wanted to protect you, to make sure you were okay, but the look Remus gave him was enough to hold him back. Remusâs gaze was gentle but resolute, silently reassuring James that he would be here, that heâd stay by your side tonight.Â
James sighed, his reluctance clear, but he finally nodded. He glanced at Sirius, then back to Remus, letting out a slow breath. âRight. Letâs let her rest then?âÂ
âYeah,â Lily whispered, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the back of your head. She lingered for a moment, her hand still gently stroking your hair. âWeâll be back in the morning.âÂ
Sirius looked like he was about to protest, his expression torn between wanting to stay and knowing he had to let you rest. But Remus quietly reached for the familiar book on your nightstand. He shuffled slightly, getting comfortable next to you. Remus turned his head to look at Sirius, offering a reassuring nod.Â
âIâve got her,â he said softly, his voice calm and steady. It was enough to ease some of the tension in the room. Sirius hesitated for a moment longer, then gave a small, reluctant nod. He exchanged one last glance with James before following Lily towards the door.Â
James lingered just a heartbeat longer, his eyes softening as he looked at you. âGet some sleep, alright?â He whispered, his voice filled with love and concern. âWeâll be here when you wake up.âÂ
âGoodnight, Bambi.â Peter mumbled from the same spot he stood earlier, slowly shying behind James as he left. And with that, they left the room, the door closing softly behind them. The silence settled back over the room, and Remus turned towards you, his presence a gentle reminder that you werenât alone. He carefully opened the book, his fingers brushing over the worn pages.Â
His voice, quiet and soothing, filled the room as he began to read, his words wrapping around you like a comforting embrace. You turned slightly, facing Remus, his voice becoming a soft rhythm that helped to steady your breaths, one at a time. His free hand rested near yours, close enough that if you wanted, you could reach for it. He didnât push. He simply stayed, his calm presence anchoring you. Eventually, as his gentle voice lulled you, the weight on your chest seemed to lighten just a fraction, and you let your eyes drift shut. For the first time that night, you allowed yourself to let go, to let the exhaustion take over. The sound of Remusâs voice, the warmth of his presence, made it feel just a little bit more bearable.
~~~
You woke the next morning to soft murmurs drifting through your dormitory. The sunlight filtered through the curtains, painting the walls in a gentle glow. For a moment, the warmth tricked you into thinking everything was fine. But then the memories of the night before came flooding back. Bartyâs betrayal, the heartbreak, the fight- and the ache in your chest returned with full force.
You forced yourself to sit up, rubbing at your stinging eyes. Across the room, you saw Lily and Remus speaking quietly near the window. Lily noticed you first, her soft smile tinged with sadness. She crossed the room, settling beside you and placing a comforting hand on your arm.Â
âMorning.â She said gently, her voice careful, as though she were afraid you might shatter under the weight of it all. âHow are you feeling?â
You swallowed, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. âI donât know,â Your voice was barely above a whisper. Your body felt heavy, like every muscle was pulling you back down into the mattress, but the weight wasnât comforting- it was suffocating.
Remus moved closer, offering you a steaming cup of tea. âTake your time.â He mused, his gaze steady and kind. You accepted the cup with a small nod, letting the warmth seep into your hands even if it couldnât reach your heart.
You hesitated before asking, âJames?â The one person you were dreading facing.Â
Lily and Remus exchanged a glance. âHeâs alright,â Lily said gently. âProbably caught up with Head Boy duties. Heâs just worried about you.â
You nodded, guilt twisting in your chest. âI didnât want to upset himâŠâ
Lily squeezed your arm. âHe loves you. He just needs time to process everything. Heâll come around.â
Remus gave you a soft smile. âHow about some fresh air? It might help clear your head.â
Reluctantly, you agreed. Staying in bed wouldnât make anything better, and maybe the cold air would numb more than just your fingers. You wrapped a robe around yourself and followed Remus and Lily out of the tower, their steady presence keeping you grounded as you moved through the quiet castle halls. Each step felt like a small victory against the chaos inside your heart.
Just as you began to feel the chill of the air prickling your skin, a familiar voice shouting down the hall made your blood run cold. The words were indistinct, but the rage behind them was unmistakable. Your heart leapt into your throat, and you quickened your pace, your pulse pounding.
When you turned the corner, the scene stopped you in your tracks. James had Barty pinned against the wall, his fist gripping the collar of Bartyâs shirt. His face was twisted in fury, his voice shaking as he snarled at him. A small crowd of students had gathered, whispering and watching the spectacle unfold.
âYou think you can just hurt her?â James spat, slamming Barty against the stone wall. âYou think there wouldnât be consequences?â
Barty didnât fight back. He stood there, taking every shove, his face pale and hollow, but his eyes- his eyes betrayed him. They werenât empty; they were frantic, burning with guilt, fear, and something that terrified you when they flicked to your own. He didnât even seem to register Jamesâs words. His entire focus was on you, standing frozen in the hallway.
Sirius leaned casually against the wall nearby, a cigarette dangling from his lips, though his sharp eyes were anything but relaxed. âGo on, Prongs,â he muttered, exhaling a plume of smoke. âGive him hell.â
Your voice cracked as you shoved through the onlookers. âJames, stop!â You shouted, panic lacing your words. But James didnât hear you, his rage blinding him as he shoved Barty again, his voice trembling with emotion.Â
âYou donât get to treat her like that, to use her, and walk away like nothing happened!â Jamesâs fist cocked back, and you screamed again, louder this time. âJames!â
Sirius turned, startled by the desperation in your voice. He immediately straightened, stepping toward James. âMate,â Sirius hissed, grabbing Jamesâs shoulder. âSheâs here.â
James froze, his chest heaving as he turned to look at you. His face softened the instant he saw the tears streaking your cheeks, but the tension in his body didnât fade entirely. He let go of Bartyâs shirt with a sharp shove, his hands falling to his sides.Â
Barty stumbled back, his hand reaching up to rub his neck, but his eyes were locked on you. His voice was hoarse and trembling when he finally spoke. âPleaseâŠâ His gaze was raw, desperate. âPlease, just talk to me.â
You froze, the pain in his eyes tugging at something in your chest even as you recoiled from him. âI donât want to-â
âShe doesnât need to,â Remusâs voice cut in, low but firm as he stepped in front of you. He placed a steady hand on your arm, keeping you rooted beside him. âThat's all, Crouch.â
Barty flinched at the tone in Remusâs voice, but he didnât look away from you. âI just need a moment,â he pleaded, his voice cracking. âJust one chance to explain- she has to know that I didnât mean-âÂ
âBartemius.â Remus said sharply, though his tone never rose. His calmness was like a dam, holding back the chaos in the room. He stepped forward slightly, his hand still on your arm. âThat's all.â
Bartyâs shoulders sagged, his face crumpling as he looked at you one last time. âI love you.â He whispered, his voice so broken it sent a chill down your spine. âYou have to know that.â
You didnât respond. You couldnât. Remus gently tugged you closer to him, shielding you from Bartyâs gaze. âCome on,â he murmured softly. âLetâs go.â
As Lily took your other side, guiding you down the hallway, you could feel Bartyâs eyes following you, like he was clinging to the sight of you as his last lifeline. Behind you, Sirius muttered something sharp under his breath before stomping out his cigarette and following James, who stood frozen, his jaw tight as he stared after you.
You felt like a pathetic child. Being ushered around and babied, but you didn't fight it. You wanted this nightmare of a year to be over.Â
So when Regulus and Evan finally came, and the Black brothers shared some hateful words- and Lily dragged James away from the impending fight, you stayed hidden under Remusâs arm. The yelling and the arguments just sounded like buzzing in your ears. Leaving you to stare blankly off at the mess you had created. Watching as Evan took Barty away and Regulus glanced at you with an expression that flashed between sour, sympathetic, and careful. Turning on his heel to hurry after his friends. You wanted this year to end.
~~~
The rest of your sixth year at Hogwarts passed in a haze. After the confrontation between James and Barty, you felt like you were living in fragments- moments of warmth with your friends interrupted by long, suffocating stretches of numbness. James, Sirius, Remus, Lily, and Peter had rallied around you, protective and supportive, but the pain lingered. Bartyâs betrayal, his mark, the weight of his choices. It all clung to you, no matter how hard you tried to shake it.
The school year ended with bittersweet farewells. James and everyone graduated, leaving behind an emptiness that Hogwarts couldnât fill. On the train ride home, James gave you a fierce hug, his voice low but steady. âYouâre going to be okay.â He whispered, as if saying it enough times would make it true. âWeâll all be okay.â His determination was a promise: he would fight, protect, and do whatever it took to keep you and the people he loved safe. It terrified how how devoted to the war he became, he hated to leave you at Hogwarts alone.
But the summer brought its own heartbreak. James and Lily joined the Order of the Phoenix, Sirius, Peter, and Remus close behind- throwing themselves into the war. The house was too quiet without Jamesâs booming laugh or Siriusâs teasing remarks. Letters from James came sporadically, and the tension in his words bled through the parchment.Â
Then, not long after James and Lilyâs wedding, your world shattered. Your parents got sick and you hardly left their bed side. They died days apart and you wondered if that's what it looks like; real love. Not able to be apart for even a week before returning to one another no matter what disaster they left behind. Though, you knew it wasn't true, just your own comfort. James, crushed under the weight of his grief, threw himself further into the Order. You rarely saw him. Remus kept you company as best he could, but even he had missions that pulled him away. Sirius made sure to remind you that James just wanted to protect what little family he had left, it killed you to not be there with them. The isolation was unbearable, every goodbye feeling like it could be the last. The ache of losing your family was only worsened by the fear that the rest of the people you loved would follow.
When you returned for your seventh year, Hogwarts felt hollow, almost unfamiliar without James, Sirius, or the others. But Dorcas Meadowes was there, refusing to leave you to fend for yourself. She became your constant companion, the person you leaned on most. The two of you forged a quiet understanding- she never pushed you to talk about Barty, and you never asked about the darkness sheâd left behind. Dorcas was the girl who had escaped the worst parts of her legacy, a beacon of strength and resilience that kept you grounded.
Still, no matter how far you tried to distance yourself from Barty, he remained a presence in your life. Letters appeared on your bed, scribbled with frantic apologies. Flowers were left outside your dormitory door, wilting reminders of his desperation. He cornered you in empty corridors, his green eyes burning with longing as he begged you to listen.
âI love you,â He whispered one evening, his voice breaking as he blocked your path outside the library. âIâve always loved you- since we were kids. You have to know that. What I did- it wasnât about hurting you. I thought I was doing the right thing. I thoughtâŠâ He trailed off, his hands trembling at his sides. âI need you, star. I canât do this without you.â
You clenched your fists, your chest tightening at the raw emotion in his voice. His words always left a mark, reopening wounds you were desperately trying to heal. âBarty.â You whispered quietly, your voice shaking. âYou need to let me go. This⊠this isnât love. Not when it hurts this much.â
He flinched as though youâd slapped him, his eyes filling with tears. âIt is love,â He insisted, stepping closer. His voice dropped to a whisper. âIâve never felt this before- it's terrifying. I haven't been in this much pain before. Iâd give you anything- everything- if you just came back to me. Star I can't do this.â
You shook your head, your breath hitching. âThatâs not what I want. I don't like feeling like this either, Barty. I wanted you, Barty. But you made your choice. Your cause- what they have done to my family alone-â
Despite your protests, the line between you blurred one night near the end of the school year. He found you in the Astronomy Tower, the only place you could escape responsibility. The sight of him made your heart ache. He looked so much like the boy you had fallen for; tousled hair, eyes filled with a longing so fierce it made your knees weak. And for a moment, you forgot yourself.
âI hate what Iâve done to you,â He confessed, stepping closer until there was barely any space between you. âI hate that Iâve hurt you. But I canât stop loving you.â
The vulnerability in his voice cracked something inside you, and before you could stop yourself, your lips met his. The kiss was frantic, desperate. His hands cradled your face as though you were something sacred, something he couldnât bear to lose. For a fleeting moment, you let yourself drown in him, in the memory of what you once had.
But as quickly as it began, reality crashed over you. You pulled away, your breathing uneven as tears blurred your vision. âWe canât.â You whispered, stepping back. âThis isnât right.â
Barty reached for you, his voice trembling. âPlease, donât do this. Donât walk away again. Iâll change- Iâll leave everything behind if thatâs what it takes. Just⊠donât leave me.â
The sincerity in his words nearly broke you, but you forced yourself to meet his gaze. âIf you loved me, you wouldâve chosen me before it came to this,â you said, your voice steady despite the tears streaming down your face. âBut itâs too late, Barty. You canât undo whatâs been done. We both.. we both know if it came to me or Regulus- me or Evan.â
âThat's not fair.â He croaked.
Your eyes flicked up to his as your tears rushed down your face. âIt isn't.â
His shoulders slumped, the light in his eyes dimming as your words sank in. For the first time, he seemed to realize that no amount of pleading or promises would bring you back to him. âIâll always love you.â whispered, his voice hollow.
You turned away, your heart shattering as you walked down the spiral staircase, leaving him alone in the tower. You didnât look back. You couldnât. You knew if you did, youâd lose your resolve.
When the train pulled into Kingâs Cross at the end of the year, you were greeted by the sight of your brother and his friends waiting for you. Jamesâs grin was wide as he swept you into a bear hug, and for the first time in months, you felt like you could breathe again. Sirius ruffled your hair, Remus gave you a reassuring smile, and Lilyâs arm wrapped protectively around your shoulders.Â
Even as you smiled, as you let yourself feel the warmth of their love and support, a part of you still ached. A part of you still thought of the boy you had left behind. But as the summer sun warmed your face and Jamesâs laughter rang in your ears, you realized that some chapters had to end, no matter how much they hurt.
~~~
The kitchen was warm, filled with the comforting smell of breakfast and the sound of soft laughter. Lily twirled Harry in her arms, humming along to the radio as James danced beside them, making ridiculous faces to elicit another bright giggle from his son. Harryâs laughter rang out like a bell, pure and joyful, filling the room with a happiness so genuine it felt almost untouchable.
June 24, 1981. The day meant nothing and yet everything, because for a fleeting moment, life felt like it was untouched by war. Even without Peter, the Potter manor felt like home again.Â
Sirius leaned against the counter, a mischievous grin lighting his face as he watched James spin Harry dramatically before dipping him like a proper ballroom partner. âFancy a dance, Bambi?â Sirius asked, holding out a hand to you with an exaggerated flourish.
You couldnât help but laugh, the sound bubbling up before you could stop it. âOnly if you promise not to step on my feet, Black.â You placed your hand in his, letting him pull you into the center of the kitchen. The music was upbeat, and Sirius matched it with absurdly exaggerated movements, twirling you around with flair that made you laugh so hard you had to clutch his shoulder for balance.
Sirius finally let out a mock sigh, fanning himself. âToo much for me, little Potter.â He joked, stepping aside. âYour turn, Moony. Show her how a real gentleman dances.â
Remus chuckled softly, stepping forward with a shake of his head. He took your hand with a gentleness that made your heart ache, pulling you into a slower, steadier rhythm despite the lively tune still playing on the radio. Even with his weight pressed heavy on his crutch, and your movements small and slow, it still felt all the same. His gaze lingered on yours, his hazel eyes soft and filled with something you couldnât quite name.Â
"You deserve this.â He muttered quietly, just loud enough for you to hear. âTo smile like this every day.âÂ
The warmth of his words filled your chest, but it was bittersweet, a reminder of all the times you hadnât felt this light. You swallowed the lump in your throat, forcing a small smile. âYou do too, Remus.â
He returned the smile, spinning you one last time before James swept in with dramatic flair, lifting you off the ground. âOne more dance before breakfast!â He announced, making you laugh despite yourself. âNo sad faces allowed today. Weâre celebrating.â
It was perfect- the kind of moment you could tuck away and hold onto when the world outside felt unbearable. Lily danced with Harry in her arms, Sirius joined in with exaggerated moves, and the room filled with the kind of happiness you hadnât felt in so long. For a brief, fragile moment, it was enough.
But then the music stopped.
The radio cut out abruptly, replaced by the somber voice of a news broadcaster. âWe interrupt this broadcast to bring you an urgent update on the latest casualties in the ongoing conflict. The names of those lost in the recent skirmish includeâŠâ
The warmth of the room vanished, the light dimming as everyone froze. James set you down gently, his expression hardening as he turned toward the radio. Lily instinctively clutched Harry closer, her face pale. Siriusâs grin disappeared entirely, his hand hovering near the dial as though he could will the news away.
The list of names continued, some familiar, most not. Each one was a reminder of the growing cost of the war, of the lives slipping away like grains of sand.
And then you heard it.
â...Evan Rosier, Bartemius Crouch JuniorâŠâ
The words echoed in your ears, louder than anything else. The world seemed to stop. You couldnât breathe, couldnât move, as the name repeated in your mind, over and over. Barty.Â
The boy who had loved you so fiercely, who had been so lost, so desperate to make you stay. He was gone. Evan too, another name tethered to your past, but it was Bartyâs that struck you like a knife to the chest.
At first, you laughed. You could of sworn James looked at you like you had lost it; you wouldn't blame him. It was ridiculous. The boy you knew, the magnetic and ethereal wizard who you gave your all too couldn't possibly be dead. He was your age. He was a kid. You had both just graduated- what in Merlin's name could they possibly be on about?Â
Your laughter slowly died down into a choked gasp and a sniffle, your body stiff. You closed your eyes tight and tried to stifle your sobs. âNoâŠâ Your knees buckled, and James caught you instantly, his arm tightening around your shoulders. Sirius reached out, shutting off the radio with a harsh click, the silence that followed deafening.Â
âHeâŠâ Your voice cracked, trembling as you forced the words out. âHeâs really gone?â
Remus stepped closer, his expression pained. He placed a hand on your shoulder, steady and comforting. âYes,â he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.Â
Lilyâs eyes shimmered with unshed tears as she rocked Harry gently, trying to keep him calm. âIâm so sorry,â she whispered, her voice breaking. The sound of her grief only deepened the ache in your chest.
James pressed his nose to your temple, his hand cradling the back of your head. âIâm sorry, Bambi,â He murmured, his voice thick with emotion. âIâm so sorry.â
The tears came before you could stop them, spilling freely as your body trembled. You clung to James like he was the only thing keeping you grounded, your sobs muffled against his shoulder. The memories of Barty overwhelmed you; the way heâd looked at you, like you were his everything; the way heâd held you, as though letting go would destroy him. The thought that you would never see him again, never hear his voice or feel his touch, crushed you.
âI thought I was over him.â You whispered through your tears, your voice trembling. âI swore I was. But nowâŠâ
Sirius moved closer, his arm wrapping around you and James. âYou donât have to say anything,â he murmured, his voice uncharacteristically soft. âWeâve got you.â
You didnât respond. You couldnât. Your throat felt too tight, the lump of grief choking you. You lifted your head to look around the room, at the faces of the people who had been your family for so long. They were blurry through your tears, but their love was palpable, a steady anchor in the storm of your emotions.
Still, the ache remained, deep and unrelenting. Because no matter how much you tried to convince yourself that you had moved on, a part of you would always carry Barty. His loss wasnât just his death; it was the loss of what could have been, the love that might have saved him if only things had been different. If only he chose it. Because you and Barty were a Hogwarts fling, everyone knows they don't last forever. But even if it crashed in a blazing glory, even if you both turned bitter, if the break up destroyed you. You'd rather feel that.
The kitchen felt colder now, the warmth of the morning replaced by the sobering weight of reality. And yet, as James held you tightly, as Sirius and Remus stayed close, as Lily hummed softly to soothe Harry, you knew you werenât alone. Even in the face of heartbreak, you were still surrounded by love. And somehow, you would find a way to carry on.
~~~ Bonus Scene~~~
The house was suffocating in its silence.
Your childhood home, once filled with laughter and the chaotic warmth of your family, now seemed cold and lifeless. James and Lily were busy with their own lives, preparing for the future that everyone whispered about in cautious tones, and Sirius had left for good reason you couldnât fault him for. You were alone, and the empty hallways of the Potter Manor only amplified the echo of your own thoughts.
It had been days since youâd learned the news of what befell Barty.
After the shock ran over you it took days of Remus coaxing to get you out of bed. Then days to be able to face a mirror. Everyone was supportive, helpful, but you felt just as pathetic as you did in school.
The ache in your chest felt heavier tonight as you climbed the stairs to your old room. The moonlight filtered through the windows, casting long, pale shadows across the walls. You reached your room and pushed the door open, slipping inside and locking it with a flick of your wand. It was habit more than anything; no one else was here.
You set your wand on the bedside table and turned toward the window, intent on shutting the heavy curtains, when a hand clamped over your mouth.
Panic erupted within you, and instinct took hold. Without thinking, you threw your head back as hard as you could, the satisfying crack of impact reverberating through your skull. A sharp, pained grunt followed, and the grip on you loosened.
Spinning around, your heart hammering in your chest, you braced for a fight- only to come face to face with the last person youâd expected to see.
âBloody hell, star,â Barty groaned, one hand pressed to his nose as he leaned against the wall for support. Blood trickled between his fingers, but his lips still curled into that maddeningly familiar smirk. âThatâs twice youâve done that. Are you always this violent, or am I special?â
The air left your lungs, your body frozen in place. âNo.â You whispered, shaking your head as if the motion could erase what you were seeing. âNo. Youâre- Youâre supposed to be dead.â
Barty let out a low chuckle, straightening up and swiping at the blood on his face. âI think.. we should talk.â
Iâm the one that requested this and OMG THIS IS SO GOOD AND I AS WELL AS EVERYONE ELSE WOULD LOVE A PART 2!!! đ«¶đ»đ«¶đ»
Hello! Could you do a Barty Crouch Jr. x Fem! Potter! Reader.
Where they are both in Ravenclaw and get close and end up dating in secret because of the Slytherins and the marauders. But then something happens and they break up but Barty shows up at the readers house years later to warn her about Harry, James, and Lily. They rekindle (smut if you write it. Or leads to that?)
And I was thinking about two different endings.
Ending 1: The reader later finds out sheâs pregnant and has to raise their child on her own until the triwizard tournament where their child meets their father?
Ending 2: The reader goes to godric hollow that night to try to help them but ends up dying and Barty finds her and holds her?
Or if you like both you can do two different Barty x reader!
Love your fics by the way and I am Hooked to the series!!
Barty Crouch Junior x Potter!RavenClaw!Reader
Summary: (See above) After a horrible break up in 7th year, Barty and you haven't spoken a word to eachother. Then, he comes barrelling back into your life begging for forgiveness, will you trust him?
Wc: 16.8k
CW: Angst Heavy. Hurt/Comfort, Barty and the reader are messssy. Sexual themes and scenes. Mom!Reader, AFAB!Reader, Dad!Barty, Non canon complacent, The first part of the fanfiction is focused on the reader- second is focused on Ophelia(your daughter).
The Potter Manor, once warm and full of life, now felt cold and empty. The high ceilings and ornate decorations that had once felt grand now only magnified the silence. The vibrant reds and golds of your family crest seemed muted, much like the life that had once filled these halls.
Your brother, James, was hiding somewhere even you couldn't name- hardly able to visit outside of special occasions. Your parents had been gone for over a year. The house was far too big, far too quiet, and far too lonely. It wasnât just the emptiness of the space itself- it was the absence of the people who had made it a home. Youâd told yourself that time would help, but the grief lingered, stubborn and heavy, refusing to fade.
Even now, curled up on the couch in the living room- the one you used to complain was too cramped- you felt the space around you stretch endlessly. With a blanket over your knees, the fireplace crackling softly, and a book resting on your lap, it should have felt cozy. Instead, it felt hollow. You ran your fingers absentmindedly over the cover of your book, your other hand drifting to the necklace around your neck, the small charm resting just above your heart- a lone magpie.Â
It matched your patronus. Well, it matched what your patronus had become. Once, it had been a darling doe- calm and serene, a reflection of your regal- that's what Sirius had said. Now, it was the magpie: small, fierce, and energetic. It suited you, or at least the version of you that remained. Youâd felt yourself change, slowly but surely, in the years you knew a love so dangerous it tore off parts of you that you no longer remmebered.
Your fingers traced the delicate charm as your thoughts wandered to the person who had given it to you. Barty. The weight of his name still felt the same, a complicated tangle of emotions that hadnât untwisted no matter how much time passed.Â
You could still see his face the night youâd told him you couldnât do it anymore. The way his sharp features had frozen, the defiance and anger creeping in as soon as the words left your mouth. Youâd said you couldnât keep hiding, couldnât keep pretending that what you had didnât matter. Youâd told him you were tired of the stolen glances, the whispered promises, and the constant fear of being caught.Â
But you knew now that what had hurt him most wasnât the ultimatum- it was the fear. Fear of admitting to the world what you meant to each other. Fear of what he might lose if he dared to love you openly. Fear that his world and yours were too different, too far apart to ever coexist.Â
Now, as you sat there in the flickering firelight, your thumb brushed over the charm, the memories tugging at your chest. The book on your lap remained unopened as you stared into the flames, the ache in your heart as familiar as the necklace around your neck.
~~~
The flickering candlelight painted Bartyâs sharp features in gold and shadow as he lay beside you, his bare chest rising and falling steadily. The heat of your bodies still lingered in the cool air of the room, your skin damp against the soft sheets tangled around your legs. His fingers toyed with the charm resting against your collarbone, his touch so gentle it made your heart ache.
âCrow, can we talk?â You whispered, your voice soft but firm, breaking the fragile silence that had fallen between you.
Bartyâs hand froze, his fingers brushing against the charm one last time before he let it fall against your chest. His jaw tightened, his green eyes refusing to meet yours as he shifted slightly, feigning casualness. âWhatâs there to talk about, birdie?â He murmured, his voice smooth but unconvincing. Unsatisfied your little exercise didn't make you truly forget what you intended to talk about. âWeâre here. Together. Isnât that enough?â
You sat up slightly, leaning on your elbow as you looked at him. âNo,â You said softly, the word carrying more weight than youâd intended. âItâs not.â
He finally glanced at you, his expression guarded. âYouâre overthinking again,â He said lightly, reaching out to brush a strand of hair from your face. âCanât we just- canât we just enjoy this?â
âEnjoy what?â You challenged, your voice trembling slightly. âHiding? Pretending? Barty, we canât keep doing this.â
He groaned softly, falling back onto the pillow and running a hand through his disheveled hair. âWhy do you have to ruin the moment?â He muttered, though his voice lacked its usual sharpness. âWeâre happy, arenât we? Isnât that what matters?â
âAre we happy?â You shot back, sitting up fully now, the blanket slipping from your shoulders. âBecause I donât feel happy, Barty. I feel like Iâm suffocating.â
He sat up abruptly, his eyes narrowing as he fixed you with a desperate gaze. âDonât say that,â He snapped, his voice rising slightly. âYou donât mean that.â
âI do,â You said firmly, though your voice broke slightly. âI love you, Barty, but I canât keep pretending this is enough. I need more. I need us- the real us.â
âThis is the real us,â He argued, his voice frantic now. He reached for you, his hand gripping your arm as if holding onto you could stop you from slipping away. âThis is how we work, birdie. This is how we survive. You think the world would let us be together? You think theyâd let us have this?â
âI donât care what the world thinks,â You snapped, your own desperation rising to meet his. âI care about us. But this- this isnât sustainable. Weâre tearing each other apart, Barty.â
âOf course you donât care,â He spat suddenly, his grip tightening as his green eyes blazed. âYou wouldnât. Youâre a Potter. You come from your perfect Potter family with your perfect, golden life. You wouldnât understand what itâs like to have a family like mine- to be a Crouch.â
His words cut deep, the bitterness in his tone like a slap. But you didnât flinch. Instead, you stared at him, your voice steady as you said, âDonât you dare.â
He blinked, startled by the fierceness in your tone. âWhat?â
âDonât you dare use my family as an excuse to run from what you deserve,â You said, leaning closer. âJust because my parents loved me, just because James and I grew up with something good, doesnât mean you donât deserve that too.â
He scoffed, the sound bitter and sharp. âI donât deserve that. Not with who I am. Not with my name.â
âYes, you do,â You said fiercely, your hand finding his cheek, forcing him to look at you. âYou deserve love, Barty. Real love. Not this shadow of it weâre living in. But you have to believe that, or none of this will ever work.â
He stared at you, trying to read your expression, his jaw so tight you swore you could hear ticking. His grip on you was bruising, but you ached for it. You ached for his want, his desperate need, because without it- you felt like you were falling apart.
You leaned into him, your once hot skin chilling against the air of the room. On instinct, his hands slipped away from your arm and he wrapped them around your waist. Your hands found his chest and you moved all that bit closer. âWouldn't that be a dream, Barty?â You whispered, voice strained and tears threatening to spill from your eyes. âIf- if our kids,â You choked out and his eyes widened at your admittance of something solid. That was your dream. To be so true, so real, that starting a family was the obvious next step. âOur kids talk about us how I talk about my parents? That our son- our daughter- our little wix. They knew what a love like ours could do.â
Your words hit Barty like a physical blow, and for a moment, he looked utterly stunned. His hands on your waist tightened instinctively, pulling you closer as though the sheer force of your desperation could tether him to the dream you had just dared to voice.Â
âOur kids,â He echoed, his voice hoarse and filled with something you couldnât quite place- something between longing and disbelief. His wide eyes searched yours, as if trying to find the certainty he couldnât feel within himself. âYou really think⊠that we could have that?â
âI know we could,â You said, your voice trembling but resolute. âBut only if you let us. Only if you stop running from it.â
He shook his head, his hands trembling where they gripped you. âYou donât get it, birdie,â He said, his voice breaking. âIâm not⊠Iâm not good like you. Like your parents. I donât know how to be that kind of person.â
âYou think my parents were perfect?â You asked, your voice rising in frustration, shaking. âThey werenât saints, Barty. They argued, they made mistakes- but they never stopped trying. They never stopped fighting for what they believed in, for each other. And you can do that too.â
He let out a bitter laugh, the sound almost choking on its way out. âYou donât know what youâre asking. My family isnât like yours, okay? My father only believes in appearances, in power. Heâd never accept this- heâd never accept us. And if he found outâŠâ He trailed off, his expression darkening as a shudder ran through him.
âI donât care about your father,â You said fiercely, your hands cupping his face. âI care about you. And youâre not him, Barty. Youâre not your father.â
His eyes closed at your words, as though they hurt to hear. âI donât know how to believe that,â He admitted, his voice barely a whisper. âIâve spent my whole life trying to be what he wants, and even thatâs not enough. I donât know how to be anything else.â
âYou donât have to be,â You said, your thumb brushing softly against his cheek. âYou just have to be you. And you have to let yourself believe you deserve more than what heâs made you think you do.â
He opened his eyes then, and for a moment, you saw the cracks in his carefully built walls- the vulnerability he worked so hard to hide. âAnd what if I canât?â He whispered. âWhat if I ruin us?â
âThen we fight through it,â You said, your voice firm even as tears threatened to spill. âWe keep trying, just like my parents did. Just like I know we can. You donât have to be perfect, Barty. You just have to let yourself love me.â
His breath slowed, his hands sliding up your back as he pulled you into a desperate embrace. His head dipped into the crook of your neck, and you felt the wetness of his tears against your skin. âI do love you,â He said, his voice raw. âI love you so much it hurts. It scares the hell out of me, birdie.â
âI know,â You murmured, your hands threading through his hair. âI know, Barty. But love isnât supposed to be easy. Itâs supposed to be worth it.â
For a moment, you thought he might let himself believe you. His arms around you felt solid, grounding, as though he was holding on to you for dear life. But then, just as quickly, he pulled back, his eyes filled with an anguish that made your chest ache.
âI donât know if I can give you what you deserve,â he finally muttered, his voice trembling. âAnd I canât bear the thought of failing you.â
âYouâre not failing me,â You said, reaching for him, but he was already pulling away, retreating back behind the walls he had built to protect himself.
âI am,â He said, his voice cracking as he shook his head. Pushing you back and getting to his feet. âI already am.â
You watched, your heart shattering as he put on his clothes, back to you. Your eyes trailed the path your nails made against his back, your silent claim on him that he always begged you for. âBarty, Barty, please.â You sobbed out and you saw how stiff he grew. âBarty, my love.â
âI hear you, Birdie.â He whispered and buttoned up his shirt. Walking back to the bed, but staying out of reach from you. âAlways such a beautiful song.â He whispered before he leaned in and stole a kiss. âI'm sorry.â
âBarty-â You strained and he kissed you again. Over and over until he managed to push you back against the bed.
âI love you Birdie.â
âBarty-â
âBut I'm.. I'm not who you need.â
Your heart broke with every word that fell from his lips, each one chipping away at the fragile hope you'd tried to build between you.Â
âDonât do this,â You whispered, your voice trembling as tears spilled freely down your cheeks. âDonât say that, Barty. Donât leave me like this.â
He closed his eyes as if shutting out the sight of you would make this easier, though you both knew it wouldnât. âI have to,â He murmured, his voice thick with emotion. âIf I stay, Iâll ruin you. I canât do that, Birdie. I canât be the reason you lose everything.â
âYou are everything,â You choked out, grabbing his wrist in desperation as he made to pull away. âCanât you see that? Youâre what I choose, Barty. Youâre what I want.â
His breath stopped at your words, and for a fleeting moment, you saw the war raging within him. His body was tense, his jaw clenched so tightly it looked like it might shatter. But then he shook his head, his eyes meeting yours with a tortured finality.
âYou deserve more,â His voice breaking as he leaned in to press one last kiss to your forehead. It lingered, soft and agonizingly final. âYou deserve a love that doesnât hurt like this.â
âI donât care about perfect,â Your hands clutching at his shirt as though you could physically anchor him to you. âI care about you.â
He pried your hands off of him gently but firmly, his touch reverent even as it was devastating. âAnd I love you,â He said, his voice barely above a whisper. âBut love isnât always enough.â
You shook your head vehemently, trying to reach for him again, but he stepped back, his retreat like a knife slicing through the air between you. âBarty, please,â You begged, your voice breaking entirely now. âPlease donât do this.â
His gaze lingered on you for a moment longer, his own tears threatening to spill, but then he turned away, his movements slow and deliberate, as if each step was a battle.Â
He paused at the door, his hand on the frame, his back still to you. âYouâll always be my song, Birdie,â He said quietly, the nickname a bittersweet ache on his tongue.
And then he was gone, leaving you alone in the room that still smelled of him, your heart breaking in the silence he left behind. The only sound was your sobs, muffled by the pillow you clutched to your chest, the magpie charm pressing cold against your skin- a painful reminder of what youâd just lost.
~~~
You gave a low shaken sigh. Trying to still your shattering heart and gather your voice before it all became too much again.Â
You looked up at the mantle above the fireplace, unable to stop the smile that curled on your lips. The photos, of your parents on their wedding day, of Jamesâs first birthday, then yours. Then a photo of Lily and Jamesâs wedding, of Harryâs first birthday- just three months ago.Â
You stared at the photographs for a long moment, your fingers tightening around the magpie charm at your neck. The smiles in the photos were so vivid, so full of joy, that it felt almost cruel. Your parents, James, Lily, even baby Harry- they were all looping so present in the frozen moments captured by the camera. Yet here you were, alone in the vast emptiness of the manor, the weight of their absence pressing down on you.
The photo of Harryâs first birthday caught your eye. His tiny hand reaching for the cake, Jamesâs laughing face as Lily leaned in to kiss Harryâs cheek. You could almost hear the sound of their laughter echoing in the back of your mind, a memory you clung to desperately.Â
Your lips quirked into a faint smile, though it didnât reach your eyes. âJames would tell me to get up and stop being so dramatic,â You muttered to yourself, shaking your head. âHeâd probably say something ridiculous like, âYouâre a Potter, we donât mope, we plot.ââ
The thought of your brotherâs mischievous grin brought a pang of longing. You missed him fiercely- his energy, his unrelenting optimism, and even the way he teased you mercilessly. James had always been your anchor, the one person who could pull you out of your darkest moments. But now he was miles away, hiding with Lily and Harry, fighting a war you couldnât see but could feel in every corner of your being.
Your gaze drifted back to the fire, the flames dancing and crackling softly. The silence in the room felt deafening again, the weight of your solitude settling back over you. You tried to distract yourself by opening the book on your lap, but the words blurred together, meaningless against the storm of thoughts raging in your mind.
You closed the book with a frustrated sigh, setting it aside as you leaned back against the couch. Your fingers traced the magpie charm absently, your thoughts inevitably returning to him.
Barty.
His name echoed in your mind, and with it came a flood of memories- his rare, boyish smiles that he reserved just for you, the way his green eyes softened when he thought you werenât looking, the way he held you like you were the only thing tethering him to the world.Â
You closed your eyes, letting out a shaky breath as the memory of his voice played in your mind:
A tear slipped down your cheek before you could stop it, and you quickly wiped it away. Crying wouldnât bring him back. Crying wouldnât change the way heâd walked out of your life, no matter how much it hurt.Â
But Merlin, did it hurt.Â
The knock at the door startled you from your thoughts, the sound sharp and sudden against the heavy silence of the manor. You froze for a moment, your heart leaping to your throat as dread washed over you. The wards. You reminded yourself of the countless layers of protection James and Lily had insisted upon. No one with ill intent could step foot near the manor. Still, it took you a moment to move.
Your fingers tightened around your cardigan as you approached the door, peering cautiously through the window. Relief and confusion mingled as you saw Remus standing there, holding a bundle of flowers and looking chilled down to the bone.
You couldnât help the way your lips curved into a smile, the first genuine one in what felt like weeks. Remus always had that effect on you, with his quiet strength and steady presence. You opened the door without hesitation, the chill of the winter evening brushing against your skin as you pulled him inside.
âRemus!â You laughed, wrapping your arms around him tightly before he could say a word. The flowers in his hands crinkled against your shoulder, and he let out a low, startled chuckle.
âHello to you too,â He murmured, his arms coming around you after a brief hesitation. His embrace was warm and grounding, and for a moment, you let yourself rest in the safety of his hold. He cradled you like you were something fragile, something he was afraid might break if he squeezed too tightly.
When you finally pulled back, his sharp eyes roamed your face, scanning for any cracks in the mask you hadnât realized youâd been wearing. âYou didnât have to bring me flowers,â You hummed softly, trying to inject some lightness into your tone as you gestured to the bouquet.
Remus gave a sheepish smile, shrugging slightly. âI thought it might brighten your evening,â he admitted. âBut if Iâd known the hug was part of the deal, I mightâve come sooner.â
You let out a laugh and furrowed your brow further, unable to help how the cheeky comment brightened up your night that little bit more. âI see Sirius has gotten into you. Come in, let's go to the kitchen.âÂ
The kitchen glowed softly, the warm light reflecting off the polished wooden counters and copper fixtures. The steady hum of the kettle was a comforting backdrop to the quiet conversation you and Remus shared. You busied yourself preparing tea, your back to him as he leaned against the table, his long limbs relaxed but his eyes watchful.
âYouâve redecorated,â He remarked, gesturing to the new curtains hanging over the window. âIâm not sure the maroon suits the Potters, though. Sirius would call it RavenClaw overkill.â
You smirked over your shoulder, a hint of genuine amusement breaking through the lingering heaviness in your chest. âSirius would call anything not leather or black an abomination,â you retorted, setting two mismatched mugs on the counter.
Remus chuckled, a low, pleasant sound that filled the room. âTouchĂ©. Though I do think the blue adds some warmth. This place could use it.â He glanced around, his expression softening. âIt feels different without⊠everyone.â
You paused for a moment, letting his words hang in the air. The truth of them settled deep in your chest, an ache that had grown all too familiar. âItâs been a bit lonely,â you admitted, your voice quieter now. âIâm not used to all this space- just me.â
He nodded, his gaze heavy with understanding. âI think theyâd hate to see you like this. Especially James. Heâd insist on dragging you to some ridiculous Quidditch match to cheer you up.â
You smiled faintly at the thought, a flicker of warmth chasing away the cold for just a moment. âHe would,â You agreed. âHeâd bribe me with chocolate frogs and promise not to embarrass me in front of the team, only to shout louder than anyone else in the stands. Calling us the seeker twins.â
Remusâs lips quirked into a small smile, but there was a flicker of something else in his expression- something that felt out of place. Nostalgia, yes, but also something deeper, something almost... reverent. His fingers drumming against his cup as he sat down at the table.
âYouâve always been good at making people laugh,â He said softly, his tone different now. His gaze lingered on you in a way that made your fingers hesitate as you poured the tea.
âYou give me too much credit,â You hummed lightly, though his words sent a faint blush creeping up your neck. âJames is the funny one. Iâm just the stubborn one.â
He tilted his head, his smile turning crooked- letting his fingers graze your wrist and fixing your cuff as you poured him his tea. âIt's a Potter trait. But I think itâs more than that.â
You turned to face him fully. âWhat are you getting at, Remus?â You narrowed your eyes, your tone teasing but your curiosity piqued.
He took the mug, his fingers brushing yours briefly, and for a moment, he didnât reply. He just studied you, his hazel eyes unusually intense. âYouâve always had this way of making people feel seen,â He said finally, his voice softer now. âLike they matter. Even when they donât think they do.â
His words caught you off guard, and for a moment, you didnât know how to respond. âThatâs⊠kind of you to say,â You managed, looking down at your tea as you tried to gather your thoughts. âI donât think Iâve ever been particularly good at- â
âYou're selling yourself short, Birdie.â He chuckled. The nickname slipped from his lips so naturally, so casually, that it took you a moment to process. When it hit, your breath caught in your throat, and the air between you seemed to still.
You set your mug down slowly, your mind racing even as you fought to keep your expression calm. You turned back to the sink, gripping the edge tightly to ground yourself. â...What did you just call me?â
Remus stiffened, and you felt his gaze burn into your back. âWhat do you mean?â He mumbled, his voice suddenly cautious.
You turned around, your heart pounding- only one person called you by that name. âWhy are you here?â You crossed your arms, your voice steady despite the storm building in your chest. âAnd donât tell me itâs for tea.â
His expression faltered for just a second- just long enough for you to see through the carefully constructed façade. âIâm here because I wanted to see you,â His tone was measured. âTo make sure you were all right.â
âNo,â You scoffed, shaking your head as the pieces clicked together. âNo, you know I'm not a fool.â
He opened his mouth to respond, but you didnât let him. âWhy are you here, Barty?âÂ
His eyes widened, and for a moment, the mask slipped entirely. The careful demeanor, the warm smiles, the familiar quirks- it all fell away, replaced by a raw, vulnerable intensity that made your breath stop.
âYou always were too clever for your own good,â He muttered, leaning back in his chair with a resigned sigh. âGuess thereâs no point pretending now.â
Your chest tightened as the truth settled in. You gave a disbelieving scoff before you ran your fingers through your hair. Pacing slightly before you paused, a scary truth settling over you. âHow did you do it?â
Barty rolled his neck and leaned further into his seat to face you again. His expression neutral- the natural arrogant energy coming from him felt horribly wrong coming from Remusâs stolen face. âWhat exactly, birdie?â
âDon't play coy.â You snapped. âHow did you get as piece of Remus for the potion you used to lie your way past my wards and into my home, Crouch?â
â... I hate when you call me Crouch.â Barty's response was almost petulant, his lips twisting into a pout as he sat back in the chair, fingers tapping rhythmically against the porcelain mug he had barely touched. He tilted his head to the side, his green eyes narrowing slightly as he studied you, the faintest ghost of a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth.
âYou always know how to wound me,â He continued softly, his tone a mockery of vulnerability. âBut then again, you've always been too good at that, haven't you?â
Your stomach churned at the way he looked at you, like you were something to be admired and consumed all at once. It was too much, too familiar, and yet so far removed from the boy you once knew. You crossed your arms tightly over your chest, grounding yourself against the onslaught of emotions threatening to overwhelm you.
âAnswer the question, Barty,â You said sharply, your voice cutting through the heavy silence of the room. âHow did you do it?â
He sighed dramatically, as though the act of explaining himself was some grand inconvenience. âRemus has always been predictable,â He snarked lazily, his gaze never leaving yours. âHe's a creature of habit, like clockwork. It wasnât exactly difficult to collect what I needed.â
Your blood ran cold at the casual way he spoke about violating the trust of someone you cared for. âYou stalked him. You used him,â Your voice trembling with anger. âYou used him to get to me.â
He smiled then, a slow, deliberate curl of his lips that sent a shiver down your spine. âI did it for you, Birdie,â he said, his voice dropping to a low, honeyed murmur. âFor us. You donât understand how much Iâve missed you, how much Iâve needed you. Every single day without you has been... agony.â
âAgony?â You repeated incredulously, your voice rising as your anger boiled over. âYou donât get to talk to me about agony, Barty. You left. You made that choice, and now you want to waltz back in here, pretending like nothingâs changed?â
âBecause nothing has!â He shot back, rising from the chair so suddenly that it scraped against the floor with a harsh screech. He moved toward you, and despite yourself, you took a step back. âYou think I stopped loving you? You think I ever stopped thinking about you? Every second, every breath, itâs always been you.â
âStop,â You said firmly, holding up a hand to keep him at a distance. âYou donât get to do this. You donât get to waltz in here, steal someoneâs face, and act like youâre some lovesick hero.â
âBut I am lovesick,â He said, his voice trembling as he closed the space between you. âIâm sick, Birdie. Sick. Youâre the only thing that makes me feel alive, the only thing thatâs ever made sense. Donât you see? Iâm here because I love you.â
âLove?â You scoffed, shaking your head in disbelief. âYou donât even know what love is, Barty. Love doesnât manipulate. It doesnât lie. It doesnât use people. Get out.â
His expression switched to one of complete shock. As if he didn't expect to actually be sent away. You turned on your heels and walked down the hall, ignoring the stunned boy for a moment before he began to follow after you, taking a heavy breath. âBaby, birdie, don't walk away. Princess.â
Merlin, you hated to hear that coming from Remusâs mouth. It made your skin crawl.
His voice followed you like a shadow, echoing in the high ceilings of the manor. âBirdie, please,â He pleaded, a mixture of whining and anger that grated against your already frayed nerves. You didnât turn around, your footsteps quick and determined as you ascended the stairs. âDonât walk away from me!â
You didnât answer. You couldnât. Every part of you screamed to keep moving, to put as much distance as possible between you and the man who was once everything to you. Your grip tightened on the banister as you climbed, trying to block out the sound of his voice.
âStop ignoring me!â He shouted, his tone sharp with frustration. He was right behind you now, his steps uneven and frantic. âDo you think this is easy for me? Do you think I want to be like this?â
At that, you stopped abruptly, your heart pounding in your chest as you turned to face him. âDo I think this is easy for you?â You snapped, your voice trembling with barely contained fury. âYouâve made it abundantly clear, Barty, that youâll do whatever you want- no matter who it hurts.â
He flinched at your words, the rawness of them cutting through his desperation. But instead of backing down, he stepped closer, his expression a twisted mixture of anguish and determination. His face flickered again, the remnants of the Polyjuice Potion struggling to hold as patches of his sandy hair and pale skin replaced Remusâs softer features.
âIâm not trying to hurt you,â He said, his voice breaking. âIâm trying to fix this. To fix us.â
âThere is no us,â you spat, your hands shaking as you stepped back. âThere hasnât been for a long time. And that was your choice, Barty.â
âNo,â he said firmly, his green eyes blazing with an intensity that sent a chill down your spine. âYou donât get to put this all on me. You think I wanted to leave? You think I wanted to-â His voice cracked, and he clenched his fists, his body trembling with barely restrained emotion. âI didnât have a choice, Birdie. You donât understand-â
âYouâre right,â You interrupted, your voice rising. âI donât understand. I donât understand how someone who claimed to love me could leave me to pick up the pieces of a life we built together. I donât understand how you can come back now, pretending like you didnât shatter me.â
He took another step forward, his hands outstretched as though reaching for something he couldnât quite grasp. âBecause I had to,â he whispered, his voice hoarse. âDonât you see? I had to protect you. From my father, from the world we were in. I-â
âStop,â you said sharply, holding up a hand to cut him off. âDonât stand there and pretend you were some kind of martyr. You werenât protecting me, Barty. You were protecting yourself.â
His jaw tightened, and for a moment, he looked like he might argue. But then his shoulders slumped, and the fight seemed to drain out of him. âMaybe I was,â he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. âBut it doesnât change the fact that I love you. That Iâve always loved you.â
âLove?â You echoed bitterly, shaking your head. âYou call this love? Breaking into my home, stealing someone elseâs face, manipulating me into letting you in? Thatâs not love, Barty. Thatâs obsession.â
At that, something in him seemed to snap. His entire body tensed, and he closed the space between you in two long strides. âFine,â he hissed, his voice low and trembling with barely contained anger. âCall it what you want. Call me a monster, call me obsessed- but donât you dare tell me I donât love you.â
Before you could respond, his knees buckled, and he sank to the stair landing at your feet, his hands clutching at your covered thighs as though it were a lifeline. His chin pressed against your skirt, looking up at you with those eyes a young girl you knew once spent hours of her time lost in. Those brilliant and calculated eyes. Here he was; Bartemius Crouch Junior, with an ego to rival the gods and the mind and skill to back it up- on his knees. Looking up at you like an obedient dog. âHow can I not love you?â He whispered. âBirdie. My beautiful song bird. How?â
Your chest heaved as you looked down at him, his once-imposing figure now crumpled before you, hands gripping your skirt like you were the only tether keeping him from falling apart completely. His words, dripping with desperation, clawed at your resolve.Â
âBarty,â You whispered, your voice trembling, a mixture of anger and grief thick in your throat. âYou need to leave.â
His eyes shot up at your words, his green eyes wide with disbelief. He stared at you as if youâd just struck him, his lips parting slightly, searching for something to say. âNo,â he said softly, his voice unsteady but growing firmer. You watched as the full potion effect dropped away. âI canât leave. Not like this. Not when I know you still love me.â
You flinched, his words cutting deeper with his true voice, but you didnât waver. âThis isnât about love,â you said firmly, though your voice cracked. âThis is about you not knowing when to let go.â
He rose slowly, his movements deliberate, careful, like a predator trying not to spook its prey. He hovered over you now, his height casting a shadow that made the grand staircase feel suddenly small. His hand reached out, trembling as it moved toward your cheek, and you instinctively stepped back, pressing yourself against the banister.
âDonât,â You warned, your voice sharp.
His hand froze mid-air, his fingers curling slightly before he dropped it to his side. He exhaled shakily, his breath warm as it ghosted over your skin. âBirdie, please,â He murmured, his voice barely audible, his lips forming words you couldnât make out. His shoulders hunched as if the weight of his own need was too much to bear. âPlease donât send me away.â
You shook your head, tears threatening to spill over as you fought to keep your composure. âYou donât get to do this,â You hissed. âYou donât get to break into my home, throw yourself at my feet, and demand I fix you. Youâre not my responsibility, Barty. Not anymore.â
His hands twitched at his sides, his jaw clenching as he fought some inner battle you couldnât see. Then, in a single motion, his hands reached for you again, his movements quick but not violent, desperate but not forceful. Panic surged through you, and before you could think, your hand flew up, striking his cheek with a sharp slap.
The sound echoed in the hollow silence of the staircase.Â
He staggered back slightly, his hand flying to his cheek, but instead of anger, a strange expression crossed his face. His lips curved into a slow, almost delirious smile, his chest rising and falling as if heâd just surfaced from drowning.Â
âThat,â He murmured, his voice rasping with something unhinged, âfelt real.â
Your stomach churned, the unease twisting tighter as he stood straighter, his demeanor shifting. His hand dropped from his cheek, and he let out a low, almost relieved laugh, shaking his head. âThatâs the Birdie I know,â he said softly, his tone dangerously gentle. âThe one who knew what our passion meant- I miss her. Can I talk to her?â
Your chest heaved with the weight of his words, the deranged calmness in his voice sending your heart into overdrive. His smug, unhinged smile made the bile rise in your throat as your fingers curled into fists at your sides.Â
âYou miss her?â You snapped, your voice sharp and trembling. âThe Birdie you claim to miss is the one you destroyed, Barty! Sheâs the one you left behind when you decided to join them!â
The smile faltered slightly, and for a fleeting moment, you saw something like regret flicker across his face. But it wasnât enough. It could never be enough to erase what he had done.Â
âYou made your choice,â you continued, stepping toward him now, your fury overriding the trembling in your hands. âYou chose to follow him. You chose to become a monster, to fight against everything I stand for, everything my family stands for. You donât get to waltz back into my life and pretend none of it happened.â
âI did it for you,â His voice rising, his green eyes blazing as he stepped closer. âEvery single thing Iâve done was for you, Birdie! To protect you, to keep you safe, to make sure youâd never have to know what itâs like to be weak. You think I wanted to join them? You think I wanted to-â
âDonât you dare,â You cut him off, your voice trembling with rage. âDonât you dare try to make this about me. You didnât join them for me, Barty. You joined them because youâre too much of a coward to stand up to your father. You wanted power. You wanted to prove to him that you were more then him. But you didnât care who you hurt along the way, did you?â
He flinched as though youâd struck him again, his jaw tightening as his hands clenched into fists at his sides. âYou donât know what youâre talking about,â He hissed through gritted teeth, his voice low and dangerous. âYou donât know what itâs like to live with the weight of that name. To have no choice but to-â
âYou had a choice!â You screamed, the words tearing from your throat as tears stung your eyes. âYou always had a choice, Barty! And you chose them. You chose power. You chose to stand against me, against my family. Against James!â
He froze at that, his eyes wide and his breath hitching as though youâd struck a nerve. But you didnât stop. You couldnât stop now, not with everything bubbling to the surface.Â
âYou think I havenât thought about you every single day?â You demanded, your voice breaking as tears began to spill freely down your cheeks. âYou think I havenât wondered if there was something I could have done, something I could have said to stop you? To save you?â
âDonât,â He whispered, his voice trembling now, the bravado in his tone beginning to crack. âDonât say that.â
âYou donât get to tell me what to say,â You spat, your voice trembling with a mixture of anger and heartbreak. âYou donât get to tell me anything anymore. You lost that right the moment you turned your back on me.â
He stared at you, his chest rising and falling unevenly as the weight of your words pressed down on him. And then, suddenly, he moved.Â
Before you could react, he closed the distance between you in a single stride, his hands gripping your face with a desperation that took your breath away. His lips crashed into yours with a force that stole the air from your lungs, the kiss searing and frantic, as though it was the only way he could express everything he couldnât say.Â
For a moment, you froze, your mind racing as the heat of his mouth overwhelmed your senses. You wanted to shove him away, to scream at him, to remind him of all the reasons this was wrong. But then something in you broke.Â
Your hands flew to his chest, not to push him away, but to pull him closer. The kiss deepened, raw and terrifying, a collision of anger, grief, and longing that neither of you could control. His hands slipped from your face to your waist, his grip bruising as he pulled you against him as if he could fuse you together.
The kiss deepened, and soon words no longer mattered. There were no more accusations, no more pleas, just the raw, unfiltered intensity of everything youâd both been holding back for far too long. It wasnât tender or sweet- it was desperate, filled with the kind of longing and pain that made it impossible to think about anything else. His hands mapped out every inch of you as though he was trying to memorize you, to hold onto something real in a world that had been slipping away from him for years.Â
And you let him. You let yourself forget, if only for a moment, what heâd done, what heâd become, and the mess heâd left in his wake. You let yourself feel, because Merlin knew you couldnât stand the ache of silence anymore. Â
It wasnât long before the tension gave way to something more, something equally terrifying and exhilarating. Clothes were discarded hastily, his lips tracing paths of fire along your skin, and for the first time in what felt like forever, the silence of the manor wasnât suffocating. It was electric.
You didnât speak a word to each other the entire time. The only sounds being your soft gasps and his inaudible murmurs- ones that sounded more like pleas than anything else. You couldnât give him more then that. Words would have only reminded you of the impossibility of it all, of everything youâd both lost. Words would have shattered the fragile bubble youâd created, where nothing else mattered but the two of you. Â
When it was over, you lay side by side in the fading moonlight, your bodies tangled in the sheets as the world slowly came back into focus. His breathing was uneven, his hand still resting on your waist as though he couldnât quite bring himself to let go. But you didnât look at him. You couldnât. You stared at the ceiling instead, your mind a chaotic storm of emotions you werenât ready to unpack.
~~~
The morning light filtered in through the heavy curtains, painting the room in soft hues of gold and grey. You stirred slightly, the ache in your body a reminder of the night before, but you kept your eyes closed, willing the world- and him- away. Â
You heard him moving about, the rustle of fabric as he dressed. For a brief, fleeting moment, you thought he might leave quietly, that he might spare you the agony of facing him after everything that had happened. But then he spoke, his voice low and hesitant, as though testing the waters. Â
âIâll come back later.â Â
You scoffed softly, rolling over to face the wall, your back to him. You didnât say a word. You couldnât trust yourself to speak without breaking, without letting the storm inside you spill out. Â
âBirdieâŠâ His voice was softer now, almost pleading, but you didnât move. You kept your breathing even, your expression neutral, even as your heart clenched painfully in your chest. Â
The air felt heavier as the silence stretched, broken only by the soft creak of the floorboards as Barty lingered by the door. His shadow loomed across the threshold, hesitant, like a ghost caught between staying and vanishing.Â
âBirdie.â He whispered, his voice raw and strained, as though dragging each word out of his chest cost him a piece of himself. âOne last thing.â
You didnât respond, your body curled away from him, but he knew you were awake. He always did.
âYou have to tell James.â He sighed, the words tumbling out in a quiet rush. âAbout his Secret Keeper.â
Your breath stopped, but you didnât move. Every muscle in your body tensed as his words settled over you like frost, cold and unforgiving.
âBarty, what are you talking about?â You finally whispered, your voice hoarse as you turned just enough to glance over your shoulder. He looked so different in the pale morning light, the shadows on his face accentuating the cracks in his armor, the boy you once loved bleeding through the man he had become.
âJust promise me,â He cut you off, his tone suddenly sharper. âYou'll.. warn him not to trust them.â
You stared at him, searching his face for answers, but all you found was that same haunted intensity youâd seen last night. He wasnât lying- at least, not about this. But that didnât make it any easier to believe.Â
â... okay.â You muttered. âI will.â
Barty stared at you like he wanted to say a million different things at once. Instead, he turned, the door closing behind him. You hugged your knees to your chest and willed away as much of reality as possible. Begging for any sense of normalcy to return; even the painful loneliness.
But nothing truly worked.
~~~
As the days went on, the weight of Barty's absence hung over the time that followed like a storm cloud. He hadnât come back, and you werenât sure if you were relieved or heartbroken. The last words heâd said lingered with you, haunting your every quiet moment: Tell James. Warn him.
Youâd followed through on his warning, albeit reluctantly. It had been difficult to convince James without revealing the entire truth, but the grim look in his eyes had told you he believed you, or at least enough to act.Â
Nothing happened at first, but Peter was monitored. It didn't take long for everything to come to light; Peter was working against you. It all worked out. James was ready for him that night, the night he came for Harry, surprising the monster before he could act. Peter tried to run after the news came out, but a furious Sirius tracked him down for a confrontation. One with an explosive end for their former friend, nothing left of the boy but a finger.
It did take a few hours of wrestling with the Aurors, but after being proper witnesses and all of your evidence of treason- Sirius was released. Walking out of the holding cell with a smile that could blunt the sun. Lily and James were safe. Baby Harry, too. Relief and disbelief were all anyone seemed capable of, but you couldnât bring yourself to celebrate. Not fully. Because in the same breath that the Dark Lord fell, Barty was taken to Azkaban.
You hadnât dared to ask about the details. Not from James, not from Sirius, not from anyone. Knowing felt like it would only make it worse. But the knowledge of him locked away, cold and alone in a place that stripped people of everything, clawed at your chest in the silence of the manor.
You had lost him all over again, and this time, you knew there was no coming back.Â
The days that followed felt like a blur of motion and noise, a sharp contrast to the oppressive stillness that had once consumed you. You refused to let Barty- or the ghost of him that lingered in your mind- define you any longer. He was gone, and you couldnât afford to let his absence drag you down any further. Not when there was work to be done.
You didnât go to his hearing. You couldnât. The idea of sitting in that courtroom, of listening to them talk about him as though he was nothing more than a monster, was too much. It wasnât that you disagreed. Heâd made his choices, and the world would see him for what heâd become. But for you, he was still the boy who had once traced your blemishes like constellations and whispered that you were the only light in his life.Â
Even now, looking back, you had always known what that young boy was capable of. The signs were there; and the raking guilt of knowing that you were possibly the only thing keeping him from becoming what he seemed so keen on being, taxed your self worth.
So, you pretended that night didnât happen. That he didnât exist. The magpie charm around your neck was tucked away in a drawer, along with the pieces of your heart that still ached for him. You buried it all deep, focusing on what you could control, on what you could fix.
Joining the Order to help clean up the aftermath of the war felt like a natural next step. It was what your parents would have done, what James would have done if he wasnât busy. Saying he wanted to be a proper father to Harry and a good man to Lily. Lily still stayed close, there wasn't many healers with her talent. But James stepped down. It was what you needed to do. The world hadnât stopped turning, and there were still Death Eaters to hunt, still innocent people to protect, still so much damage to undo.
The first few missions were grueling, physically and emotionally. You worked long hours, tracking down the last of Voldemortâs loyalists and dismantling the remnants of their operations. It was dangerous, messy work, but you thrived in it. The chaos kept you moving, kept you from lingering too long on the memories that threatened to pull you under.
You found solace in the chaos of the Order. Sirius, always protective, tried to keep a close eye on you, though he seemed to understand your need for space. Remus was steadier, offering quiet support when you needed it most, though you often pushed him away. And James- when he wasnât with Lily and Harry- was your anchor, his unrelenting optimism a reminder of the person you used to be.
But there were moments, late at night, when the world went quiet, and you couldnât escape the weight of it all. When you lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling, and his voice echoed in your mind. When you caught a glimpse of something out of the corner of your eye that reminded you of him, and your heart clenched painfully before you forced yourself to look away.
And then there were the whispers. The Order didnât really talk about Barty, he was just another cog in the operation, but you heard the murmurs. About his trial, about Azkaban, about how someone so young and clever could have fallen so far. You kept your head down, pretending not to hear, but the words cut deep.
The recklessness came on slowly at first, creeping into your choices like an insidious shadow. You pushed yourself harder on missions, volunteering for the riskiest tasks, throwing yourself into danger with a desperation that bordered on self-destructive. It was easier to focus on the fight, on the rush of adrenaline and the sharp edge of survival, than to confront the gaping void Barty had left behind.
Sirius and Remus noticed, of course. They werenât blind to the way you flinched at certain names, or how you worked yourself to exhaustion. Sirius tried to laugh it off at first, making quips about how you were channeling your inner Gryffindor âunder all that Ravenclawâ. But Remus, ever perceptive, wasnât fooled. His hazel eyes lingered on you with quiet concern, though he said nothing outright. Not until the mission that changed everything.
It was supposed to be a straightforward raid: infiltrate a suspected Death Eater hideout, gather intel, and get out. But things rarely went as planned. The ambush was swift and brutal, spells ricocheting off walls and sending debris flying. You and Remus were in the thick of it, your wand moving instinctively as you deflected curses and fired back.
Then it happened. A flash of green light, too close, too fast. It was aimed directly at Remus, who had his back turned while shielding a fallen comrade. Without thinking, you moved. You felt the spell hit you like a freight train, knocking the air from your lungs as a searing pain ripped through your side.Â
You barely registered Remusâs horrified shout as you crumpled to the ground, your vision blurring. The sounds of the battle faded into a dull roar as your consciousness slipped away, the last thing you saw being his anguished face hovering over you.
~~~
Remus paced the length of the ornate carpet, his fingers raking through his hair repeatedly as though he could scrub away the memory of what had happened. Sirius sat slumped on the sofa, uncharacteristically silent, his dark eyes fixed on the fireplace. The flickering flames did nothing to ease the tension in the room. Â
Remusâs chest tightened with guilt, each second that passed driving the weight deeper. He could still see it- the flash of green light, the way you had thrown yourself in front of him without hesitation. The moment felt frozen in time, looping endlessly in his mind. Â
âMoony, sit down,â Sirius huffed finally, his voice low and hoarse. It was an order, but not a harsh one. Â
âI canât,â Remus replied, his voice taut as a wire. âShe- she couldâve-â Â
âBut she didnât,â Sirius interrupted, his tone firm. âSheâs alive, and Lily is better then any healer we have.â Â
Remus halted mid-step, his jaw clenched tightly. âShe shouldnât have had to save me,â he said, his voice cracking. âShe- sheâs half alive, Sirius. If anything happens to her-â Â
Siriusâs gaze darkened, and he stood, crossing the room in a few long strides. He placed a hand on Remusâs shoulder, squeezing it tightly. âYou listen to me,â His eyes were sharp but his voice was steady. âSheâs as stubborn as James, maybe more so. Thereâs no way sheâd have stood by and done nothing, and you know it. Blaming yourself wonât change anything.â Â
Remus opened his mouth to respond, but the sound of the front door opening cut him off. Both men turned toward the entrance just as James entered, his face pale and tense. Harry toddled in after him, clutching his fatherâs pant leg with wide, curious eyes. Â
âWhere is she?â James asked immediately, his voice sharp with worry. Â
âSheâs upstairs,â Sirius said quickly. âLilsâ with her. She hasn't come back down yet.â Â
The tension in the room was suffocating, the silence broken only by the faint crackle of the fire and the occasional creak of floorboards as Remus paced. Sirius watched James carefully, noting how his hands trembled ever so slightly as he held Harry close. It was subtle, but for someone as unshakable as James Potter, it was telling.
âI need to go to her,â James said abruptly, his voice sharp and breaking the heavy stillness. He passed Harry to Sirius, who took the toddler without protest, his dark eyes wary. âSheâs my sister. She shouldnât be alone.â
âYou canât,â Sirius said firmly, standing up to meet Jamesâs gaze. âLily said we need to give her space. Sheâs working.â
âI donât care what Lily said!â James snapped, his voice louder now, desperation seeping into his tone. âThatâs my little sister lying upstairs, Sirius. If something happens- if she-â He cut himself off, swallowing hard as he fought to steady his breathing. âI canât just sit here.â
âYou think I want to?â Sirius shot back, his voice rising to match Jamesâs. âYou think Remus wants to? Merlin, Prongs, weâre all going mad down here, but Lily knows what sheâs doing. Sheâll call us if- when- thereâs news.â
James ran a hand through his hair, his frustration palpable. He knew if anyone could understand even a fraction of what he was feeling it was Sirius- you had endeared yourself to him in a way not many people could. And those people were in this house. âShe doesnât get to keep me from her,â He muttered, his tone dangerously low now. âNot her. Not anyone.â
âJames, listen to me,â Sirius snapped, stepping closer, his hand gripping Jamesâs shoulder tightly. âYou storming in there isnât going to help her. Itâs not going to help anyone.â
Before James could respond, the sound of light footsteps descending the stairs cut through the room like a knife. All three men turned toward the staircase as Lily appeared, her face pale and her expression unreadable. The sight of her made James freeze, his words dying in his throat. Siriusâs grip on Harry tightened, and Remus stopped pacing entirely.
Lilyâs hands were clasped tightly in front of her, and her eyes darted between the men before finally settling on James. âCan I speak with you alone?â She asked softly, her voice calm but heavy with something that made Jamesâs stomach churn.
âWhat is it?â He demanded, taking a step toward her. âLily, just tell me-â
âPlease, James,â She interrupted, her voice breaking just slightly as she glanced toward Harry, who was still nestled in Siriusâs arms. âCome with me.â
James hesitated, his body rigid with tension, but the look in Lilyâs eyes left no room for argument. He turned back to Sirius and Remus, his jaw clenched tightly. âIâll be back,â He said, though his voice wavered.
James followed Lily just a few steps into the hallway before she stopped, her back to him as she hesitated. Lilyâs words were hushed and inaudible, even to Remusâs keen ears- or maybe, he just wasn't willing to know just yet.
Jamesâs expression shifted from tension to something unreadable, his brows drawing together as he processed Lilyâs quiet words. The weight of whatever she had said seemed to hit him all at once, and his jaw went slack, his eyes widening in stunned disbelief.
Sirius and Remus exchanged a quick glance, their concern growing as they watched James stagger back a half step, his hand running through his already disheveled hair. His lips moved as though forming a question, but no sound escaped. Whatever Lily had told him, it had shaken him to his core.
Sirius shifted Harry on his hip, his protective instincts flaring. âWhat the hell did she just say to him?â He muttered under his breath to Remus, his dark eyes narrowing.
âI donât know,â Remus replied quietly, his voice tight with unease. James finally looked at Lily, his wide eyes searching hers for confirmation.Â
James didn't hesitate after Lily's nod. He took the stairs two at a time, his worry and confusion pressing heavily on his shoulders. His hand gripped the banister tightly as he moved, the wood creaking faintly under his weight. Sirius and Remus exchanged uneasy glances from their spot by the fireplace, the tension thick enough to choke on. Â
Lily lingered at the base of the stairs for a moment, watching James's retreating form before turning back to the room. She mustered a soft, reassuring smile, though it didnât quite reach her eyes. Â
âSheâs fine,â she said quietly, addressing Sirius and Remus. Â
Sirius raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. âFine? You call that fine?â He gestured toward the staircase with a sharp nod, where James had disappeared moments before. âProngs looked like he was about to keel over.â Â
âShe is,â Lily insisted gently but firmly. âBut James.. they just need to talk.â Â
Remus frowned, his sharp hazel eyes darting between Lily and the stairs. âIf sheâs fine, why is he in such a rush? What arenât you telling us, Lily?â Â
Lily hesitated, her smile faltering slightly as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. âItâs not my place to say,â she said finally, her voice soft but resolute. âYouâll have to ask her yourselves when sheâs ready.â Â
Sirius let out a low growl of frustration, running a hand through his hair. âGreat. Love a good mystery. Just what we need after all this.â Â
Remus, however, wasnât so easily placated. His gaze lingered on Lily, his instincts screaming that there was more to the story than she was letting on. But he didnât press her. Not yet. Â
Instead, he leaned back against the arm of the couch, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. âWhatever it is, itâs obviously got James in a state,â he muttered under his breath. Â
Lily offered him a small, almost apologetic smile before excusing herself, taking Harry from Sirius, as she headed toward the kitchen, leaving Sirius and Remus to stew in their unease. Â
~~~
James reached the door to your room, his breath coming in shallow bursts as he paused to gather himself. He wasnât sure what he was expecting to find on the other side. The worry twisting in his chest was relentless, and the weight of Lilyâs cryptic words only added to his unease. Â
He knocked softly, his knuckles brushing the wood. âItâs me,â He called quietly, his voice trembling slightly. âCan I come in?â Â
There was a moment of silence, and then your voice- weak but steady- drifted through the door. âItâs open.â Â
James pushed the door open and stepped inside, his eyes immediately searching for you. You were propped up against a pile of pillows on the bed, your complexion pale but no longer deathly. A soft blanket was draped over your lap, and a steaming mug rested on the nightstand beside you. Â
Relief flooded through him at the sight of you awake, but it was quickly tempered by the shadow of exhaustion that lingered in your eyes. Â
âHey,â he said softly, his voice breaking the quiet. Â
You managed a faint smile, though it didnât quite reach your eyes. âHey, Jamie.â Â
He crossed the room in a few strides, pulling the chair closer to your bedside and sinking into it. His hands fidgeted in his lap as he searched for the right words, his gaze flickering between your face and the mug on the nightstand. Â
âYou scared the hell out of me,â He sighed finally, his voice barely above a whisper. Â
You looked down, your fingers picking at the edge of the blanket. âI know. Iâm sorry.â Â
James shook his head, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. âDonât apologize,â He said firmly. âJust⊠talk to me. Please. Whatâs going on? Lily said youâre fine, but-â Â
âLilyâs right,â You cut in gently, meeting his gaze. You were able to see all the true overbearing nature of James Potter. When you were younger his protective nature used to irritate you- he was always on, all the time, brash and loud- a proper lion. Now? You wanted nothing more than to curl up against him and cry. But that's the last thing you could allow yourself to be- weak. âIâm fine, James. Or at least, I will be.â Â
He studied you for a long moment, his hazel eyes filled with a mixture of concern and doubt. âLily said.. you needed to tell me something.â
James tilted his head slightly, his brows furrowing as he studied your expression. There was something guarded in your eyes, something that made the air between you feel heavier. His concern deepened when you let out a soft, shaky breath and slowly ran your hand over your abdomen.
The motion was small, almost absentminded, but it struck James like a thunderclap. His eyes widened, his lips parting as the realization sank in. For a moment, he was utterly still, his mind racing to catch up with what youâd just silently told him.
âNo,â he breathed, the word barely audible as he leaned back in his chair, his face pale with shock. âNo.â
You didnât say anything, didnât move, didnât breathe. You simply held his gaze, your fingers resting lightly on your abdomen.
James swallowed hard, his voice trembling as he asked, âBambi, when?â
The nickname, soft and familiar, broke something inside you. But you held firm, your eyes flickering away from his as you shook your head. âIt doesnât matter,â You whispered, your voice barely above a murmur.
Jamesâs leg began to bounce, his eyes flickering from you to the door a few times before he shot up from his seat and began to pace. âWhen did you find out?â He demanded sharply, his voice tight with tension. Â
âTonight,â You admitted quietly, your fingers curling around the blanket on your lap. Â
James stopped mid-step, spinning on his heel to face you. âTonight?â He repeated, his voice rising slightly. âAnd you didnât think to tell me immediately? Merlinâs sake!â Â
You flinched as his voice raised, but you held your ground, meeting his gaze with a calmness you didnât entirely feel. âI was a little busy almost dying, James,â You hissed, your voice firmer now. Â
He opened his mouth to argue but then snapped it shut, his jaw tightening as he resumed pacing. âFine. Fine,â He muttered, more to himself than to you. âBut youâre leaving the Order.â Â
You let out a sharp, humorless laugh, shaking your head. âAs if theyâd want me back after that stunt,â You shot back. âIâm not exactly in peak condition for fieldwork, am I?â Â
James ignored your sarcasm, his hands balling into fists as he continued his relentless pacing. âGood. You shouldnât be anywhere near this madness,â He said firmly, his tone brooking no argument. âNot now.â Â
Your heart clenched at his words, the overbearing protectiveness youâd come to associate with him hitting harder than ever. But before you could respond, he stopped abruptly, his hazel eyes narrowing as a new thought seemed to strike him. Â
âWho is it?â He demanded, his voice sharp and almost accusatory. âWho?â Â
You swallowed hard, the weight of his question settling over you like a lead blanket. âIt doesnât matter,â You pushed, though your voice wavered slightly. Â
Jamesâs expression darkened, his jaw tightening as he began to pace once more. âDoesnât matter?â He echoed incredulously, his voice rising. âIt absolutely matters, Bambi. You canât just- Merlin, you canât drop something like this and expect me not to-â He cut himself off with a growl, shaking his head as he muttered under his breath. Â
James's pacing came to an abrupt halt, his hazel eyes narrowing as the pieces began to fall into place. He turned to you, his expression shifting from confusion to a dawning realization that made your stomach drop. Â
âThe wards,â he said slowly, his voice low and dangerous. âThe ones Lily and I put up for you- someone wouldâve had to get past them. Someone who knew how to.â Â
You froze, your heart pounding in your chest as his gaze locked onto yours, sharp and unrelenting. Â
âWho was it, Bambi?â he demanded again, his tone deadly serious now. âWho the hell got past the wards?â Â
Your throat tightened, and for a moment, you couldnât find your voice. You looked away, your fingers gripping the blanket tightly as if it could shield you from the weight of his question. Â
âAnswer me!â Jamesâs voice cracked, a mixture of desperation and anger bleeding into his tone. Â
You took a shaky breath, your gaze fixed on the wall as you whispered, âYou donât want to know, James.â Â
âThatâs not your choice to make,â he shot back, his voice trembling. âTell me.â Â
You finally met his gaze, your eyes brimming with tears as you whispered the name that had haunted you for weeks, for months: âBarty.â Â
The silence that followed was deafening, the weight of your admission hanging heavy in the air. James stared at you, his face a mixture of shock, anger, and something deeper- betrayal. Â
âBarty Crouch?â He asked slowly, his voice barely above a whisper. Â
You nodded, your throat too tight to speak. Â
âBarty Crouch Junior?â James pushed and you gave a weak scoff.
âJames- yes Junior.â You huffed, your anger boiling over.
James stared at you, his chest rising and falling with the effort of keeping his temper in check. His jaw clenched so tightly you thought it might shatter, but his eyes- those familiar, warm hazel eyes- betrayed the storm inside him. He was angry, yes, but the anger wasnât directed at you. It wasnât even directed at Barty. It was directed at himself.
For a moment, the room was silent, the only sound the faint beating of rain against the windows. You could see it, the way his hands trembled slightly as he tried to decide what to say. Finally, he spoke, his voice low but sharp enough to cut through the silence.
âHow long?â He asked, his tone controlled but strained. âHow long were you seeing him?â
You swallowed hard, gripping the blanket in your lap. âJames-â
âHow. Long.â His voice cracked, louder this time, the control slipping for just a moment. He was trying, you knew he was trying, but the weight of everything was too much for even him to hold back.
You took a shaky breath, forcing yourself to meet his gaze. âIt started fifth year.â you admitted quietly. âIt ended seventh. And he.. he showed up here. He told me about Peter.â
Jamesâs face twisted, and he turned away, his hands dragging through his already-messy hair. He let out a low, frustrated sound that was somewhere between a sigh and a growl. âFifth year?â he muttered to himself. âMerlin, Bambi, how did I not see it? How did I-â He cut himself off, pacing again.
You bit your lip, tears stinging your eyes. âJames, please-â
âI..â He started but stopped- as if your tears alone tore apart at his flimsy heart. Closing his eyes and taking a steady breath. âSo he made it past the wards. He came and told you about Peter and what? You-â
âJames please just drop it. He's in Azkaban for life! It doesn't matter.â
James froze mid-step, his fists clenching tightly at his sides as his back remained turned to you. His shoulders heaved with the weight of unspoken words, his frustration palpable in the charged silence that filled the room.
"It doesn't matter?" He finally repeated, his voice low and filled with a quiet, simmering rage. "It doesn't matter?"
You flinched at his tone, gripping the blanket tighter as you tried to steady your breathing. "He's gone, James," you said softly, your voice trembling. "There's nothing left to fight over. There's no point in dragging this out."
James spun around to face you, his hazel eyes blazing with a mixture of anger, hurt, and disbelief. "No point?" He hissed, taking a step closer. "You think Iâm angry because of him? Merlin, Bambi, I couldnât give a damn about Barty Crouch. Iâm angry because you didnât tell me. Youâve been carrying this- this secret- alone, and now youâre trying to push me away again."
"I'm not pushing you away," You shot back, your voice rising slightly. "I'm trying to protect you! You have Lily, Harry- your family. You don't need to be dragged into this mess, James. Itâs mine to deal with."
His expression softened for a fraction of a second, but the anger quickly returned. "Youâre my family," he said fiercely, his voice breaking slightly. "You always have been. And if you think for one second that Iâm going to stand here and let you face this alone, then you donât know me at all."
You stared at him, the raw emotion in his voice cutting through your defenses like a blade. Your chest ached, torn between the desire to let him in and the fear of burdening him further. "James, I-" you began, but your voice faltered as tears welled in your eyes.
He closed the distance between you, dropping into the chair beside your bed. His hand found yours, warm and steady despite the tremor in his grip. "Listen to me," he said softly, his tone losing its edge as his thumb brushed over your knuckles. "I donât care how messy this is. I donât care how much it hurts. I just care about you."
The dam inside you broke, and a sob escaped your lips as you clung to his hand like a lifeline. "I donât know how to fix this," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "I donât know how to move forward."
James squeezed your hand tightly, his gaze unwavering. "You donât have to figure it out alone," he said firmly. "Weâll take it one step at a time, together. You hear me, Bambi? Youâre not alone in this."
The weight on your chest eased ever so slightly as his words sank in, the overwhelming love and determination in his voice a balm to your fractured soul. You nodded, unable to speak as the tears streamed down your face, and James pulled you into a tight embrace.
For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you allowed yourself to lean on him, to let the walls youâd built around yourself crumble. And as James held you, murmuring reassurances that you would face whatever came next together, you felt the smallest flicker of hope begin to bloom in your chest.
After you recovered, you faced the daunting task of telling Sirius and Remus. Their reactions were nothing like youâd expected. After weeks of being stuffed up in that dingy room.
Sirius, ever the one to surprise you, turned softer than youâd ever seen him. It reminded you of the day Lily announced she was pregnant with Harry. He was standing in the kitchen when you told him, fiddling with a mug of tea. The moment the words left your lips, his eyes widened, and he nearly dropped the mug onto the countertop.Â
For a moment, you thought he might pass out, but then his face broke into a beaming smile that almost seemed out of place for the weight of what youâd just told him. âYouâre joking,â he said, his voice barely above a whisper. When you shook your head, tears welling in your eyes, he stepped forward, his hands gripping your shoulders firmly. âMerlin, youâre not joking.â
âIâm sorry,â You began, your voice cracking as the apology spilled from your lips. âI didnât mean for this to happen, I-â
âStop,â Sirius interrupted, his tone so warm it took you aback. He let go of your shoulders and instead pulled you into the tightest hug youâd ever received. âDonât you dare apologize,â he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. âYouâll be a good mum, do you hear me? A bloody brilliant one.â
Tears slipped down your cheeks as you clung to him, his words washing over you like a balm. âBut Sirius,â you tried again, your voice muffled against his shoulder. âThe father-â
âI donât care,â he said firmly, pulling back to look at you. His gray eyes were intense, but not with judgment- only love and determination. âI donât care who he is, or what heâs done. This baby is going to have the best mum in the world. And theyâre going to have me too, whether they like it or not.â
You let out a shaky laugh, his unwavering support lifting some of the weight off your chest. He grinned at you then, that mischievous, boyish grin you thought youâd lost after the war. âMerlin, James is going to lose his mind when he meets them,â He said, his voice laced with humor. âBut Iâm going to be the favorite uncle, just you wait.â
But then there was Remus.
You found Remus later in the sitting room, a book in his lap, though he wasnât reading it. His eyes were distant, his fingers absently tracing the edges of the pages. He looked up when you entered, and the small smile he gave you faltered slightly when he caught sight of your expression.
âRemus,â you started hesitantly, sitting down on the sofa across from him. You fidgeted with your hands, unsure of how to begin. âThereâs⊠something I need to tell you.â
He didnât say anything, but the corner of his mouth quirked upward ever so slightly. His gaze flickered to your stomach for a moment, then back to your face. His expression was calm, almost amused, but there was a glint of something in his hazel eyes- something knowing.
âI-â you faltered, feeling suddenly uneasy under his gaze. âItâs⊠itâs important.â
He hummed softly, setting the book down on the armrest. âGo on, then,â He said, his tone light but laced with curiosity. He leaned forward slightly, resting his elbows on his knees as he studied you.
You took a deep breath, the words caught in your throat. âRemus, I-â You stopped when he lifted a finger to his nose and tapped it lightly, the gesture so quick and casual it took a moment to register.
You frowned, your heart skipping a beat as realization slowly dawned on you. âRemus,â you said again, your voice sharper this time. âYou already know.â
His smirk grew slightly, the mischievous tilt of his lips catching you completely off guard. âI might,â he said nonchalantly, leaning back against the couch with an air of smugness. âThough itâs much more fun watching you squirm.â
You stared at him, your mouth opening and closing as you tried to process his words. âHow?â You finally managed, your voice a mix of shock and disbelief. âHow do you know?â
He shrugged, crossing one ankle over his knee. âIt wasnât hard to figure out,â he said casually, though there was a teasing lilt to his tone. âThe scent changed a few days ago.â
âThe scent?â You repeated, utterly baffled.
His smirk deepened, and he tapped his nose again, his hazel eyes sparkling with amusement. âEnhanced senses, remember? The subtle shifts, the hormones- itâs all there. Just like Lily. Didnât think Iâd notice?â
You stared at him, utterly dumbfounded. âYou could smell that I was-?â
âPregnant?â He finished for you, his tone softening slightly. Hearing Remus be the first to break- to finally say the word properly- it brought a smile to your face. âYes.â
You buried your face in your hands, groaning softly as the embarrassment washed over you. âMerlin, Remus, you couldâve said something!â
âAnd miss this moment?â He teased, leaning forward again. âNot a chance.â
You peeked at him through your fingers, narrowing your eyes. âYouâre insufferable.â
âOnly because I care,â he quipped, his smirk turning into a warm smile. He reached out, his hand resting gently on yours. âI knew youâd tell me when you were ready.â
His words melted some of the tension in your chest, and you let out a shaky laugh. âWell, Iâm telling you now,â you said softly. âIâm⊠Iâm having a baby.â
His smile grew, the teasing glint in his eyes giving way to something softer, something warmer. âI know,â he said simply, his voice steady and reassuring. âAnd youâre going to be amazing.â
Tears pricked at your eyes as his words settled over you, their sincerity hitting you squarely in the chest. âThank you, Remus,â you whispered.
~~~
Even after everything, it was as smooth as it could possibly be. James, Lily, and Harry all finally packed up from their safe house and moved back into the Potter Manor.Â
Sirius and Remus finally stopped torturing everyone and confessed to their little run around of affections.Â
The years passed like a dream, each one carrying its own triumphs and heartaches. The war faded into history, though its scars remained etched into the lives of those who survived it. Life moved on, not always neatly, but with a resilience that surprised you.
Sirius and Remus opened a small library nestled on the corner of Diagon Alley and a quiet cobblestone street. It was cozy, with tall shelves of books that seemed to reach the ceiling, a perpetually warm fireplace, and a small reading nook tucked into the back. The name on the window read Padfoot and Moonyâs Rare Reads, though it quickly became known simply as âThe Den.â
Remus spent his days writing accurate, unbiased Defense Against the Dark Arts books, ones that became staples in Hogwarts classrooms. His name grew to rival even Gilderoy Lockhartâs (though, unlike Lockhart, Remus didnât need embellishments to sell books). Sirius, of course, claimed full credit for every ounce of their success, though he spent more time charming patrons and hosting wildly popular storytelling nights than actually working.
Your daughter, Ophelia, was the light of your life. She had her fathers eyes- but carried a quiet intensity in her gaze that reminded you of a young girl you once knew. Sirius adored her, and James, ever the doting uncle, took it upon himself to teach her everything he could about Quidditch, much to Lilyâs dismay. Harry, now only 6, had taken on a brotherly role, often sneaking her chocolates or helping her catch frogs in the garden when no one was looking.
But it was Remus who seemed to understand Ophelia in ways even you sometimes struggled to. He noticed the way she retreated into her own thoughts, the questions she asked that were far too insightful for her age. He never pushed her, always waiting patiently for her to come to him with her thoughts, her worries, or her triumphs. It was Remus who first noticed how much she loved books, spending hours reading to her in that steady, soothing voice of his.
One quiet afternoon, while Ophelia played on the rug with a stack of enchanted building blocks, you stood at the counter of the library, watching Remus as he worked on editing a draft of his latest book. The sunlight streamed through the windows, catching the streaks of silver in his hair, and you couldnât help but smile.
âIâve been meaning to ask you something,â You said softly, your voice breaking the comfortable silence.
Remus looked up from his notes, his hazel eyes warm and curious. âWhatâs on your mind?â
You stepped closer, your hands resting lightly on the counter. âI wanted to ask if youâd consider being Opheliaâs godfather.â
His expression froze for a moment, his pen hovering above the page. Then, slowly, a smile broke across his face, wide and genuine in a way that made your chest ache with affection. âAre you serious?â He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
âDead serious,â You teased lightly, though your voice trembled with emotion. âShe adores you, Remus. And so do I. Thereâs no one else Iâd trust more.â
He set his pen down and rose from his chair, crossing the short distance between you in a few strides. He hesitated for only a moment before pulling you into a tight, warm hug. âIt would be an honor,â He murmured, his voice thick with emotion. âThank you.â
~~~
It was late summer, and the warm golden light streaming through the windows of the Potter Manor made the room feel alive, even as you worked through the seemingly endless task of packing Opheliaâs trunk for another school year at Hogwarts. She sat nearby, perched on the edge of the armchair with her dark hair falling in loose waves over her shoulders, her head bent over her meticulously written list.Â
She was elegant without trying, a quiet sort of grace that seemed inherent in her very being. Even now, as she frowned slightly at the parchment in her hands, the faintest furrow of her brow betrayed her focus; her fingers fiddling with the magpie necklace you gifted her on her eleventh birthday. You couldnât help the soft smile that tugged at your lips as you watched her. She was so much her own person- intelligent, curious, and brimming with quiet determination- but in her moments of focus, you could see glimpses of her father in her too. It made your chest ache with a love so fierce it almost hurt.
âMum,â She said finally, her voice gentle but tinged with that signature note of exasperation. She didnât look up from her list as she spoke. âI told you- I need new potion vials. The ones from last year cracked.â
You folded one of her robes carefully and placed it into the trunk, glancing over at her with a soft chuckle. âAnd I told you, my love,â You hummed, your voice calm and warm, âthat youâll get them when we go to Diagon Alley. Harry and the Weasleys are meeting us there, remember?â
She let out a dramatic sigh, finally lifting her head to meet your gaze. Her sharp, inquisitive eyes- so much like his and yet so uniquely her own- sparkled with that combination of pride and determination that seemed to define her. âI donât see why I canât just go by myself,â She challenged, crossing her arms over her chest in that effortlessly regal way of hers. âIâm not a baby, you know.â
You raised an eyebrow at her, the corners of your mouth lifting into a knowing smile. âYouâre thirteen,â You countered gently, pausing in your task to give her your full attention. âAnd while I have no doubt that you could navigate the alley on your own, Iâd prefer to keep you in one piece. Humor your mother, will you?â
Ophelia rolled her eyes dramatically, but the faint smile that tugged at her lips betrayed her. âFine,â she relented, her tone light but tinged with mock indignation. âBut only because you insist.â
You laughed softly, reaching over to brush a stray strand of hair from her face. âThank you, darling,â you murmured, your voice soft with affection. âI donât know what Iâd do without you to keep me on my toes.â
She tilted her head slightly, her expression softening as she studied you. âProbably live a very peaceful, boring life,â She sighed in faux aspiration, her words playful but her tone warm. âNo dramatic letters about professors or requests for obscure potion ingredients.â
âDonât forget the long rants about Magic Theory,â You added with a smirk, resuming your task as you carefully folded another one of her robes. âIâd be lost without those.â
Ophelia gave a delicate shrug, her lips curving into a smile that was pure mischief. âWell, someone has to keep you informed,â She said lightly, glancing back down at her list. âYouâd be dreadfully out of touch without me.â
âPerish the thought,â You mused, your tone laced with mock horror. But as you reached for another item to pack, you couldnât help the warmth that bloomed in your chest.Â
Despite her pride and sharp wit- or perhaps because of it- Ophelia had a heart so full of love and passion that it left you in awe. She was your miracle, your everything, and the reason you had fought so hard to build a life worth living after everything youâd endured. And though she sometimes tested your patience, you wouldnât trade a single moment with her for the world.
As you worked together in companionable silence, the house around you buzzed faintly with the promise of the day ahead. Soon, the Floo Network would carry her off to join Harry and the Weasleys, and you would meet James and Lily later at the Leaky Cauldron. But for now, in this moment, it was just the two of you, and the quiet love you shared was enough to fill the room with light.
âOphelia,â You called softly, breaking the silence as you tucked the last item into her trunk. She looked up at you, her expression curious. âYou know I love you, donât you?â
Her sharp features softened instantly, and she set her list aside, crossing the small space between you to wrap her arms around your waist. âOf course I do, Mum,â She murmured, her voice quiet but sure. âAnd I love you too.â
You held her close, your heart swelling with a love so fierce it threatened to overwhelm you. No matter how many years passed or how independent she became, she would always be your little girl. And in that moment, as the sunlight streamed through the windows and the world felt soft and safe, you were reminded once again of just how lucky you were to have her.
~~~
The cobbled streets of Diagon Alley buzzed with life, the chatter of families mingling with the clink of cauldrons and the rustle of shopping bags. Children darted between storefronts, their excitement infectious, while parents called after them, juggling lists and parcels. But Ophelia paid the lively scene no mind. She moved with purpose, her steps elegant yet determined, weaving through the crowd with a quiet confidence that belied her thirteen years.Â
âHonestly, Harry, itâs just a bookstore,â sheâd said earlier, rolling her eyes at her cousinâs protests. âIâll be fine.â Her tone, a perfect blend of exasperation and poise, had left little room for argument. Sheâd dismissed him with a wave of her hand, her pride unwilling to entertain the notion that she needed an escort for something so trivial.
Now, her prize- a hefty tome on advanced magical theory- was clutched tightly under her arm, its worn leather cover radiating the promise of knowledge. She moved briskly, her dark hair swaying as she navigated the bustling street, her mind already racing ahead to the countless possibilities the book would unlock. The noise of the crowd seemed to fade as she glanced down at the book, her lips curving into a satisfied smile.Â
It wasnât just the content that thrilled her- though the promise of unraveling complex magical concepts certainly did- it was the independence of it all. Sheâd insisted on going alone, had chosen the book herself, and now, with it safely in hand, she felt a sense of accomplishment she wouldnât admit to anyone.Â
With her head held high and a quiet pride radiating from her, Ophelia turned her steps back toward the group, determined to reunite with Harry and the others before anyone could begin another lecture on responsibility. For now, though, the world felt bright, the possibilities endless, and she relished the brief moment of freedom.
That was when she heard it.
The cheerful hum of Diagon Alley faded into the background as a sharp, panicked cry reached Ophelia's ears. She froze mid-step, her heart skipping a beat as her gaze snapped toward a shadowy alley just ahead. The sound came again, muffled but unmistakably distressed. Her fingers instinctively tightened around the book she carried, and she shifted her weight forward, craning her neck to see.
In the dimness of the alley, two figures stood locked in a tense struggle. The taller one had the smaller pinned against the brick wall, his grip tight around the otherâs collar. âYou've got nerve, Pettigrew.â The smaller figureâs pale hair fell in messy strands across his face as he squirmed against the hold, his voice trembling.Â
âPlease,â the blonde figure gasped, desperation lacing every syllable. âIâm sorry! I wonât look for you again. H-he wonât hear of your escape- not from me!â
Opheliaâs breath hitched. Her heart hammered against her ribs as she took in the scene. The smaller figureâs voice cracked with panic, his pale blue eyes wide and darting frantically. The taller figure, shrouded in shadows, stood silent and imposing, his wand raised. A faint, menacing glow illuminated the tip, the threat unmistakable.
She didnât think. She didnât pause. Her wand was in her hand in an instant, and she stepped into the mouth of the alley, her voice cutting through the tense air like a blade.
âOi! Let him go!â She shouted, her tone sharp and commanding.Â
Both figures froze, their heads snapping toward her. The taller manâs wand lowered slightly, his body going rigid with hesitation. The smaller figure twisted his neck, his gaze locking onto hers, and for a fleeting moment, Ophelia saw a flash of something in his pale eyes- hope? Relief?
It didnât last.Â
The blonde manâs lips parted, and before she could speak again, his body jerked unnaturally. The sound of cracking bones and tearing sinew filled the air, a grotesque symphony of transformation. Opheliaâs stomach churned as she watched the manâs form contort, shrinking and twisting. Within seconds, he was gone, replaced by a scruffy, dirt-streaked rat.
âWhat the- ?â The words barely escaped her lips before the rat lunged forward, its sharp teeth sinking into the taller manâs hand.Â
The man let out a hiss of pain, his grip faltering just enough to allow the rat to squirm free. In a blur of motion, it darted down the alley, disappearing into the shadows with a faint, scuttling sound.Â
Ophelia stood rooted to the spot, her wand trembling slightly in her grasp. Her wide eyes flicked from the spot where the rat had vanished to the man now turning toward her, his movements deliberate, his frustration radiating like heat.Â
As he stepped into the dim light filtering from the street, his features came into view. Sharp, angular lines carved a face that was both striking and unsettling. His dark hair fell messily across his brow, and his green eyes burned with a mixture of irritation and something else- something far more dangerous.
Ophelia squared her shoulders, her heart thundering in her chest but her chin lifting in defiance. She clutched her wand tightly, the poised elegance of her posture belying the unease bubbling beneath the surface. Every lesson her mother had taught her about composure echoed in her mind, steeling her nerves.
âWho do you think you are?â she demanded, her voice cold and cutting. âPicking on someone smaller than you in an alley? How pathetic.â
The manâs lips quirked into something that might have been a smirk, though it didnât reach his eyes. He took a step closer, his tall frame casting an intimidating shadow. âAnd who,â he said, his voice low and measured, âdo you think you are to interrupt something that doesnât concern you?â
âIâm the girl whoâs about to hex you into next week,â she shot back without missing a beat, her wand steady as she pointed it at his chest. âBack off, or youâll find out just how much trouble a thirteen-year-old can cause.â
The man hesitated, his head tilting slightly as he studied her. His gaze dropped from her face to her neck, and his sharp eyes narrowed, honing in on the small magpie charm resting just above her collarbone. The faint light caught the delicate metal, and for a moment, his composure faltered.
âThat,â he murmured, his voice strained, âisnât yours.â
Opheliaâs brows furrowed, her hand instinctively rising to the charm. Her fingers brushed over the familiar metal as her mind raced. âWhatâs it to you?â she retorted, her tone sharp, her grip on her wand unwavering. âIt was a gift.â
The manâs jaw tightened, and for a fleeting moment, something flickered across his face- recognition, anger, and a hint of something she couldnât quite place. âWho gave it to you?â he demanded, his voice rougher now, almost desperate.
Her lips pressed into a thin line, and she straightened her spine, her wand tip glowing faintly as she met his intensity head-on. âThatâs none of your business,â she said firmly.Â
He took another step forward, his green eyes blazing with an intensity that made her breath hitch. âIâll ask you again,â he growled, his voice a dangerous whisper. âWho gave you that charm?â
Ophelia didnât flinch. Instead, she tilted her chin higher, defiance sparking in her gaze. âMy mom,â she said clearly, her voice carrying an unmistakable note of pride. Her lips curved into a faint, deliberate smile as she added, âYou should know her. Iâm a Potter, after all.â
The man froze. His entire body stiffened, his green eyes widening ever so slightly before narrowing again. Something shifted in his expression, a mixture of shock, pain, and anger that he quickly tried to mask. He stared at her as though he were seeing a ghost.
Ophelia arched an eyebrow, her confidence swelling as she saw the cracks in his composure. âOh,â she said lightly, her tone dripping with mock disappointment, âdonât tell me youâve forgotten about us. That would be awfully sad- we are war heros.â
The manâs lips pressed into a thin line, his hands twitching at his sides. He took a small step back, his expression unreadable as he muttered, âA Potter.â
âThatâs right,â she said evenly, her wand still raised. âAnd unless youâd like to explain what youâre doing lurking in alleys, I suggest you leave.â
He didnât respond. Instead, he turned sharply on his heel and disappeared into the shadows without another word, leaving Ophelia standing in the mouth of the alley, her chest heaving as she tried to steady her breath.
She glanced down at the charm again, her fingers brushing over its surface. Who was that man? she wondered, a faint chill creeping down her spine. And why did the sight of this charm seem to haunt him so?
~~~
The Leaky Cauldron buzzed with its usual chatter, the comforting scent of roasted meat and freshly baked bread drifting through the warm air. You sat at a large table with James, Lily, Sirius, and Remus, laughing at one of Siriusâs over-the-top tales from Hogwarts. The lightness in the room felt like a rare and precious gift, a momentary escape from the shadow of battles fought and sacrifices endured.
The door swung open with a sharp creak, a gust of cool air sweeping in as Harry entered with Ron, Ginny, and Ophelia. Their cheeks were flushed from the bustling streets outside, their movements slightly hurried. Your gaze instinctively fell on Ophelia.Â
Something was wrong.
She lingered behind the others, her usual confident stride replaced with hesitant steps. Her arms were crossed tightly over her chest, as though trying to shield herself from the world. Her sharp features looked drawn, pale, and etched with unease.Â
âOi, there they are!â Sirius called out, raising a hand in greeting. âTook you long enough. Did you stop for ice cream?â
Ron mumbled something about Fred and George dragging them into Weasleysâ Wizard Wheezes, but his words barely registered. Your focus stayed fixed on Ophelia as she slipped into the seat beside you. She didnât look up, her fingers fidgeting with the edge of her cloak, her head bowed like she was trying to disappear.
âOphelia, love,â you said gently, leaning closer to her. âEverything alright?â
Her shoulders tensed, and for a moment, she said nothing. She just sat there, her hand brushing against the magpie charm around her neck. It was a small, almost subconscious motion, but it spoke volumes.
âYeah,â she murmured after a pause, though the tremor in her voice betrayed her. âIâm fine.â
You frowned, your worry deepening. She was many things- brilliant, fiery, and determined- but never this quiet. You reached into your bag, pulling out a few Galleons, and slid them toward Harry, Ron, and Ginny. âWhy donât you three grab some ice cream for real this time? My treat.â
The three exchanged uncertain glances, but Ron was the first to shrug and stand. Harry hesitated, his concerned gaze darting toward his cousin, but eventually, he and Ginny followed Ron out of the pub.
The second they were gone, you turned back to Ophelia. âYou donât look fine,â you pressed softly. âWhat happened?â
Across the table, James and Lily shared a look, their worry mirrored in their expressions. Sirius, his usual joviality replaced with quiet intensity, leaned back in his chair, studying Ophelia closely. Even Remus put down his cup of tea, his sharp gaze focused on her.
Opheliaâs fingers twisted together in her lap, her head ducked low. âItâs nothing,â she muttered, her voice barely audible.
âOphelia,â you said again, your tone a little firmer this time. âYou can tell me. Whatever it is, Iâm here.â
For a moment, she stayed quiet, the tension in her shoulders radiating like a pulse. Then, in a gesture so small it almost went unnoticed, she leaned into you. Her head rested against your arm, her nose pressing into the fabric of your sleeve.Â
You froze for half a second before wrapping an arm around her, pulling her close. She didnât cry- Ophelia never cried- but the way she clung to you spoke louder than words. âMom.â She muffled against your side. As if recharging her spent bravado and bravery in your arms. âDo we know a Pettigrew?â
Netflix you know what youâre doing
warnings: death
slow burn Coriolanus Snow x reader, slight Felix Ravinstill x reader
Chapter 16: Aftermath
You wake up feeling dazed, disoriented. The ceiling above you is unfamiliar, high and intricate with golden detailing carved into its moldings. The bed beneath you is too soft, the sheets too smooth, like silk against your skin. You shift slightly, trying to sit up, when an arm tightens around your waist. Your body stiffens.
What the fuck?
Panic shoots through you for a second before last nightâs memories come flooding back. The exhaustion. Felix insisting you come home with him. Falling into bed before you could even think twice about it.
Oh no. No, no, no.
You groan internally. You were tired, sure, but how could you have let this happen? Felixâs house. Felixâs bed. Felixâs arms wrapped so tightly around you that escape feels impossible. And when you get homeâif you get homeâQuincy is going to have a field day. He always does. Though lately, heâs been too busy. You donât see him as often. You donât sit down for dinner together. You try to come home after everyoneâs asleep and leave before they wake. But heâll know. He always knows. And you have no explanation to give him.
You shift again, trying to pry yourself from Felixâs grasp, but he groans in annoyance and only pulls you closer.
âFelix,â you mutter, voice still rough with sleep. âI have to go.â
He buries his face against your shoulder. âNo, no we donât have to go anywhere,â he mumbles sleepily. âStay. Letâs get breakfast. Letâs take the day off.â
You shake your head. âI canât. I really canât.â
Felix sighs, rubbing at his face before propping himself up on one elbow. âWhy?â
You sit up, already scanning the room for your clothes. âI have to talk to Dr. Gaul. Sheâs going to be expecting me.â
His expression shifts, his easygoing sleepiness fading into something more tense. âWhy do you always have to leave?â His voice is sharper than before, tinged with frustration. âWhy canât you just stay with me?â
You glance at him, confused by the sudden shift in tone. âWhat are you talking about? You know Iâm busy. So are you. I canât just take a day off.â
Felix scoffs, running a hand through his messy hair. âIs it Coriolanus?â
You freeze for a second before rolling your eyes. âOh, please. Youâre being dramatic. This has nothing to do with Coriolanus.â
âIt always has something to do with him,â Felix presses, his voice darkening. âI saw it. The way you looked at him.â
You push against his chest, trying to create space between you, but he doesnât let you. âFelix, youâre blind.â
âThen prove it,â he says. âStay.â His grip tightens on your wrist. âStay with me. Stay in bed.â His voice softens. âPlease.â
You inhale sharply, heart hammering. âNo. I canât.â
Felix exhales slowly, finally loosening his hold. But even as he releases you, his fingers remain tangled with yours. He always does thisâalways finds a way to touch you. Whether itâs a hand on your knee, fingers brushing against your wrist, his presence always lingering.
He sits up, watching you as you move around the room, aimlessly searching. âWhere are my clothes?â you ask.
âI had them thrown away.â
You turn sharply. âWhat?â
âThey were filthy,â Felix says simply. âThey were torn. You werenât going to wear them again, so I had the maids bring you something new.â He gestures lazily. âTheyâll bring it to you in a minute.â
You let out a slow breath, trying not to get more frustrated than you already are. âFine.â
Minutes later, the maids arrive, carrying a neatly folded dress. You take it, holding it up in front of you. The fabric is luxurious, softer than anything youâd normally wear. The cut is modestâbut just barely. If it were any shorter, it would cross the line from refined to provocative.
And itâs white.
You frown. White. You never wear white. It makes you feel like a child bride. And you know, without a doubt, that Felix picked this. He didnât choose something youâd likeâhe chose something he would like to see you in.
You slip into the dress, brushing out your hair, trying to ignore the way it fits too perfectly, like it was tailored for you overnight. You stare at yourself in the mirror, lost in thought, when Felix moves behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. His lips brush against your neck. âStay,â he murmurs against your skin. âWe could be comfortable. Come back to bed.â
You stiffen. His kisses become sloppier, more insistent. You know exactly what heâs trying to do.
âNo,â you say firmly, stepping out of his grip.
Felixâs hands drop to his sides, his face darkening. For a second, it looks like he might argue, but instead, he lets out a heavy sigh. âFine.â His voice is flat. âCall me later.â
You nod, barely listening.
âCall me tonight,â he repeats, watching you carefully. âWeâll go to dinner.â
You exhale. âOkay.â
Felix calls your driver, and soon enough, youâre slipping out of the house, walking through the eerily silent halls of the Presidentâs mansion. Itâs strangeâso many people live here, so many servants, so many visitors from powerful families, and yet it always feels... empty. Hollow. Like the walls themselves are absorbing all the life inside them.
Finally, you step outside, into the fresh air, and climb into the car waiting for you. As soon as the door shuts, you let your head fall back against the seat and sigh.
You moved quickly through the corridors of the Capitol, your footsteps echoing off the pristine marble floor. The peacekeepers at the entrance barely gave you a glance before granting you access to the underground levels, where Dr. Gaulâs true domain lay.
The air grew colder the deeper you went, the artificial lights casting long, eerie shadows. As you descended, the scent of raw fish curled into your nose, unmistakable and putrid. A sharp chorus of squeals rang outâfeeding time. Then, silence.
You swallowed thickly, keeping your eyes forward, pretending you didnât hear, pretending you didnât know what happened in these halls. You had always done that, because fear made it easier. Fear kept you from wondering too hard about what went on behind the reinforced glass or what kind of creatures lurked in the shadows of Gaulâs twisted creations. Fear reminded you that if it ever came down to you or them, you would always choose yourself.
When you reached the lab, Dr. Gaul was standing over a steel enclosure, dropping chunks of flesh into it. A wet, slithering sound accompanied each drop, followed by quick, greedy gulps. Your stomach twisted, but you forced yourself to remain composed.
Dr. Gaul turned to you, her smile wide and unnatural. âOh, my little dove,â she cooed. âHow was your little excursion last night?â
Your spine stiffened. âEventful.â
âEventful, she says,â Gaul chuckled, tilting her head. âCome, letâs check you up.â
She stepped forward, her gloved hands reaching out to examine you. Cold fingertips brushed against your wrist, then your jaw, tilting your head side to side as Gaulâs grin stretched wider, inspecting you like you were just another one of her projects. You forced yourself not to recoil.
âI started out as a medical doctor, you know,â Gaul said conversationally, stepping back. âSterile. How awful, you must imagine, to be the first thing a baby sees in this world.â She sighed dramatically. âParents always expect reassurances, but what can I possibly tell them? How could I know what their children would face?â
You said nothing, but you knew where this was going.
âLike you, last night,â Gaul continued, voice filled with an eerie amusement. âWho would have imagined the darling daughter of Lason Royce, fighting for her life in the Capitol arena? Not him, for one.â
Your lips parted slightly, but you had no response. You barely remembered your father anymore. His face was always a blur, shifting in your memory like a phantom you could never quite catch.
âWhat was it like?â Gaul asked. âThe arena?â
You met her gaze, unwavering. âTerrifying. Just like it was designed to be.â
Gaul let out a laugh. âYes, indeed.â
You exhaled sharply.
âWhat about the tributes?â Gaul smirked. âWhat about them?â
You hesitated.
âWhat did you think of them, now that their chains were removed? Now that they tried to kill you, not because they had to, but because they wanted to?â
Gaulâs eyes gleamed. âAh. Youâve seen it, havenât you?â
You thought back to the escape, to the sheer bloodlust in the tributesâ eyes even after they were free. âI felt like an animal. Like prey being hunted.â
âBut you werenât.â
âNo,â you admitted. âBut I always am. No matter where I go, Iâm always prey.â
Gaul let out a delighted hum, as if you had just said exactly what she wanted to hear. âMission accomplished, then.â
She walked over to a counter, idly flipping through a file. âThat little one from EightâSnow beat him to a pulp. Now weâll have to fabricate some lovely tale for Flickerman to spin. What a wonderful opportunity for you.â She glanced up, her grin sharp. âTransformative, wasnât it?â
You felt the phantom sensation of blood on your skin, the memory of Coryo bashing into that boyâs face over and over again. The sickening crunch, the shiver down your spine. It brought back too many memoriesâwar, home, the never-ending cycle of violence.
Blood. Blood. Blood.
It was all you ever saw.
Gaul tapped her fingers against the counter. âWasnât it more than you couldâve hoped for?â
You inhaled slowly. âYou needed me to get Sejanus out of the arena, obviously. But you also wanted me to⊠what? Experience it?â
Gaulâs grin widened.
âEven if it killed me?â Your voice tightened.
âThat was a risk.â
âWithout the threat of death, whatâs the point of a lesson?â Gaul mused. She gestured vaguely. âWhat happens in the arena, my dear, that is humanity undressed. The tributes. And you. How quickly civilization disappears. All your fine manners, your education, your family backgroundâit all falls away in an instant, revealing what you really are.â
Your stomach twisted, but you werenât surprised. âAnd? What was the point? I already knew all this.â Your voice sharpened. âIâve always known. Iâve seen it before.â
Gaul let out a pleased hum. âI thought you might need a reminder, little dove.â She stepped closer, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. âI donât want you going soft.â
Your jaw clenched.
Gaul tilted her head, watching you carefully. âI need you to realize where you are in this world⊠and where you will stay if you donât change it.â
Your breath hitched.
Gaulâs voice turned saccharine, condescending. âYou canât stay my little dove forever.â
Your fingers curled into fists at your sides. You had nothing to say to that. Because deep down, you werenât sure if you wanted to argue.
Gaul simply smiled and turned away.
The conversation was over. But the lesson lingered.
The main student body had been told to report at 7:45, so the early arrivals consisted of active mentors and a few aides tidying up the hall. You couldnât help but throw a guilty glance at Juno Phipps, who sat discussing her strategy, knowing she couldâve just slept in. Your thoughts wandered to how they would announce Bobbinâs death and how Coriolanus would reactâbut you doubted he would care.
Everything from yesterday had already been set up, and since the crowds hadnât arrived yet, you decided to join Festus. The only thing being served in Heavensbee Hall was tea, which brought grumblings from Festus. âIf we have to be here early, youâd think they could at least feed us,â he muttered.
âYouâd think,â you replied.
Coriolanus sauntered up beside Festus, casually joining the small group. âWhat happened to your face?â
âBike accident,â Coriolanus said loud enough for everyone to hear, his eyes briefly glancing at you. He tossed a bag containing a roll to Festus.
âThanks, this looks great,â Festus said, digging in immediately.
Conversations continued around you, but you barely paid attention. Your mind drifted, replaying the events of the past few weeks. Your life had suddenly become a living nightmare with the start of the Hunger Games, and it didnât help that Coriolanus kept making eye contact with you. As the rest of the school arrived and took their seats, you chose to separate from the group, heading toward the game makersâ station to observe behind the screens.
The monitors showed little changeâexcept for the disappearance of Marcusâs body. No one seemed to question it. You assumed it was still by the barricade, where Coriolanus and Sejanus had abandoned it last night, just out of range of the cameras.
At the stroke of eight, the anthem played, and everyone stood. You werenât much of a singer, so you remained quiet as Lucky Flickerman appeared on the screens, welcoming everyone to Day Two of the Hunger Games.
âWhile you were sleeping, something pretty important happened,â Lucky announced. âLetâs take a look, shall we?â
The feed cut to a wide shot of the arena before slowly panning in on the barricade. As you expected, Marcusâs body lay nearby, but your stomach twisted when Bobbinâs battered form came into view. He looked much worse than you had imaginedâhis limbs twisted unnaturally, his swollen face barely recognizable. Coriolanus had really done that to another boyâa young boy. You stole a glance at him, but all you saw was the back of his head. Even from there, you knew he was nervous. He might have seemed like a good liar to everyone else, but you always knew better.
After a long look at the bodies, the show cut back to Lucky, who pondered aloud who might have committed the act. His mood abruptly shifted. âOne thing we do know is that weâve got something to celebrate!â
Confetti rained from the ceiling as Lucky blew wildly on a plastic horn. âWeâve just hit the halfway mark! Thatâs rightâtwelve tributes down, only twelve to go!â A string of brightly colored handkerchiefs shot from his sleeve as he swung them around his head, laughing and cheering. When he finally calmed, he adopted a somber expression. âBut that also means we have to say farewell to Miss Juno Phipps.â
A man approached Junoâs side to escort her out, but she suddenly spoke up. âSomething seems off to me,â she said. âI mean, whatâs he doing over there with Marcusâs body? Who moved it? And how did Bobbin end up dead? I canât even imagine a likely scenario.â
The reporter, intrigued, pressed further. âWhat exactly would qualify as foul play?â
âI donât know exactly,â Juno admitted. âBut I, for one, would really like to see a replay of last nightâs events.â
Good luck with that, you thought. But then the idea lingered. Maybe a recording did exist. Maybe there were two versionsâone for the public and another kept private. Youâd have to look into it later, though you doubted you could access it or that Dr. Gaul would even keep such a thing.
Juno was dismissed with a patronizing pat on the back, still sparkling with confetti. Lucky, oblivious to her frustration, leaned toward the camera with barely contained glee.
âAnd now, I suppose youâre all wondering about our extra big surprise! Especially if youâre one of the twelve remaining mentors.â
Your eyebrows furrowed. What the hell was he talking about?
Before you could dwell on it, Lucky bounded across the stage to reveal two men sitting side by sideâhis father, Strabo Plinth, whose stern expression was as immovable as the granite of his home district, and Sejanus, looking hollow-eyed and stiff.
Lucky took the host chair and patted Sejanusâs leg. âIâm sorry we didnât get a moment with you yesterday to comment on your tributeâs⊠unfortunate demise.â
Sejanus merely stared, uncomprehending. Lucky seemed to notice his injuries for the first time. âYou look like youâve been mixing it up yourself.â
âI fell off my bike,â Sejanus rasped.
Two biking accidents in twelve hours? That seemed highly unlikely.
âOuch! Well, I guess youâve had some pretty big news to share with us,â Lucky continued, nodding encouragingly.
Sejanus hesitated, while neither he nor his father acknowledged each other. A silent battle raged between them. Finally, Sejanus exhaled. âThe Plinth family would like to announce that we will be awarding a full-ride university scholarship to the mentor whose tribute wins the Hunger Games.â
A murmur rippled through the crowd. Several mentors gasped in delight. You rolled your eyes, knowing that most of them didnât need the money nearly as much as others did.
As the interview dragged on, your thoughts churned. Sejanus had been rightâhis father was trying to cover up his sonâs disgraceful behavior with a generous bribe. Not that it didnât merit damage control. You hadnât heard much gossip about the outburst with the chair yet, but you suspected stories were already spreading.
As the interview ended and the Games were broadcast once again, nothing particularly interesting happened throughout the morning. The tributes seemed hesitant to make any bold moves. Coral and Mizzen roamed together for a while, collecting food and water from their mentors, Festus and Persephone. The two mentors had been strategizing together, and it was clear that Festus had a crush on Persephone. It wasnât exactly breaking newsâheâd harbored feelings for her for a long time. Still, every time you looked at Persephone, you couldnât help but think of Coriolanus and the story he had told you about her war time stew.
Would you tell one of your close friends that their crush was a cannibal? It seemed unorthodox, even cruel. For all you knew, Persephone herself might not even be aware. But the thought lingered, unsettling you as you moved through the uneventful lunch period. At least, this time, when people sent food or water, the drones didnât crash. You had one of the other Gamemakers bring you whatever was being servedâa small sandwich, nothing remarkable.
Later in the afternoon, You had the Gamemakers reduce the mentor seats to twelve, leaving only space for those whose tributes were still in the Games. âIt makes it easier for the audience to keep track of whoâs still a contender,â you told them, instructing them to keep removing seats as more tributes fell. A grim game of musical chairs, but with real consequences. The decision seemed to make livia even more bitter, if that was possible. You felt a twinge of sympathyâbut only a small one. What caught your attention more was how this change forced Coriolanus closer to Clemencia, who remained scaley, snake-like, and entirely focused on him, her glare never wavering.
As the afternoon stretched on, your exhaustion caught up with you. Your head grew heavier, and at one point, a fellow Gamemaker had to nudge you awakeâtwice. Perhaps it was fortunate that so little was required of you today, given how last night had nearly killed you.
Tributes remained mostly hidden until late in the day when the Hunger Games finally delivered the kind of action audiences expected. The girl from District 5âa wiry, forgettable thing whose name escaped youâwas caught wandering the arena. Lucky Flickerman managed to connect her to her equally forgettable mentor, Iphigenia Moss, the daughter of the man who oversaw agriculture and the distribution of food across Panem.
Contrary to expectations, Iphigenia always seemed on the verge of malnutrition. She had a reputation for giving her school lunches to classmates, sometimes blacking out from hunger. Festus had once mentioned that it was her only form of revenge against her father, though he refused to elaborate. True to form, Iphigenia funneled every bit of food she could to her tribute. But even as the drones made their long trek across the arena, the trio of Coral, Tanner, and Mizzen emerged from the tunnels, hunting.
After a brief chase along the bleachers, they surrounded the District 5 girl. Coral ended it with a trident to the throat, making you cringe.
âWell, thatâs that,â Lucky said, unable to recall the girlâs name.
When prompted, Iphigenia had already left the dais. âHer name was Sol. Or maybe Sal,â the reporter said with a shrug.
âNot much more to tell.â
âNice job getting her to the second day, alibina,â Lucky added.
âItâs Iphigenia,â she corrected over her shoulder as she exited, not bothering to glance back.
âRight,â Lucky continued smoothly. âAnd that means weâre down to just eleven tributes left!â
Thank God, you thought. Iâm one step closer to finally going home.
The rest of the day passed without much excitement, and as you were finally being dismissedâsomething you were immensely grateful forâLucy Gray made an entrance.
You groaned aloud as she sprinted out of a tunnel, her braid unraveling, her hair flying wild behind her. In your head, you were already hoping that one of the trioâmaybe Coralâwould kill her just to get this over with. Then you could finally go home.
But before you could even guess what was chasing her, Jessup staggered out of the same tunnel. At first, you thought he was woundedâmaybe heâd been protecting Lucy Gray. They were from the same district, so it made sense that they would have formed a pact. But if they were allies, why had she run?
As the cameras zoomed in, it became clear that Jessup wasnât injuredâhe was sick. Stiff, feverish, twitching with erratic movements. He swiped at the sun, crouched, then sprang to his feet again in an unsettling cycle. His behavior made your skin crawl.
Your first thought was poison. Had Coriolanusâs little songbird found a way to get rid of her own ally? But that seemed unlikely. Jessup was a valuable protector, especially with those other tributes prowling around. Any number of things in that arena could have sickened himâcontaminated water, spoiled food.
But then, you saw the telltale foam bubbling over his lips.
Oh, God, you thought.
Jessup had rabies.
Rabies had made a comeback in the Capitol during the war, with doctors needed in the field and medical faculties and supply lines compromised by the bombings. Medical treatment had been sketchy for humans, and for a lot of people, it had become essentially nonexistent. Pampered pets were no longer a priority when people couldnât even afford bread.
How it began remained a matter of debateâan infected coyote from the mountains, a nocturnal encounter with a batâbut the dogs spread it. Most of them were starving, abandoned casualties of the war themselves. From dog to dog, then to people, the violent strain developed with unprecedented speed, killing over a dozen Capitol citizens before a vaccination program brought it under control. You remembered the posters alerting people to the warning signs in both animals and humans, adding just one more potential threat to your world.
And poor Jessup had been bittenâby what, you werenât sure. But it was on the neck. The quicker the virus reached the brain, the quicker you died. And of course, he was half-starved and weak. Poor Jessup, you thought. Even his death had to be horrible.
The recognition of Jessupâs illness put the audience on edge, setting off a wave of comments thick with fear and revulsion.
âRabies? How did he get that? Mustâve come from the district.â
âI bet heâs gonna infect the whole city.â
âA little unprecedented, but not after seeing it spread through the city once.â
âThe Capitol should just put him down. They knew he had it before he tried to spread it around like some apocalypse.â
The students seemed to draw back into their seats, not wanting to miss anything, but the murmurs of unease were unmistakable. The disease dredged up childhood memories of public warnings, and no one wanted to see its horrors play out again. You stayed silent, watching Jessup zigzag across the arena in Lucy Grayâs direction. There was no telling what was going on in his mind. Under normal circumstances, maybe heâd protect her, maybe not. But he had clearly lost his reason. If she had any sense, sheâd run for her life.
The cameras tracked Lucy Gray as she sprinted across the arena, scrambling up the broken wall into the stands. The press box occupied a midway position, somehow spared in the bombings. She stopped a moment, panting, considering Jessupâs erratic pursuit. Then she made for the debris of the nearby concession stand. The skeleton of its frame remained, but the center had been blasted to bits and the roof flung thirty feet away, strewn with bricks and boards. It was an obstacle course as she traveled until she planted herself at the top of the mess. The Gamemakers took advantage of her stillness, zooming in for a close-up.
Much to your delight, she looked like hell. You didnât know why you disliked her so muchâyou just did. And you werenât sure you were ready to tackle the whole of that dislike just yet.
An order for a bottle of water came through from Coriolanus, which you approved with little interest, sending a drone out. Jessup, meanwhile, had made his way across the arena, climbing into the stands after Lucy Gray. His balance wavered as he entered the debris field. He fell twice, with such force that he opened gashes on his knee and temple. The second wound produced a fair amount of blood. He sat, somewhat stunned, reaching a trembling hand toward Lucy Gray, his mouth moving, but only foam dripped from his chin.
Lucy Gray remained motionless, watching Jessup with a pained expression. The scene created a strange tableauârabid boy, trapped girl, bombed-out buildingâa tale that could only end in tragedy. Star-crossed lovers meeting their fate? A revenge story turned inward? A war saga that took no prisoners?
Just die already, you thought. Enough with the dramatics.
A drone carrying the water flew into the arena. Lucy Gray lifted her face, tracking its wobbly progress. Her tongue flicked across her lips in anticipation. However, as it passed over Jessup, something in him registered the sight. A shudder raked through his body. He swung at the drone with a broken board, and it crashed into the stands, the water pouring out of the cracked bottle. That was when he truly lost it.
Suddenly, five more water orders came through from Coriolanus. Then ten. You approved them absentmindedly, wondering what he was trying to do. And then it clicked. Hydrophobia. Rabies victims couldnât swallow and went wild at the sight of water.
Clever, you thought, glancing down at the screen where Coriolanus seemed to be arguing with Sejanus. You couldnât make out what they were saying.
Lucy Gray had worked herself into a tight spot. To her left was the high back wall of the arena; to her right, the thick glass side of the press box. As Jessup continued his pursuit, she made several attempts to escape him, but he kept cutting her off. When he came within twenty feet, she spoke to him, holding out her hand in a soothing manner. It stopped him, but only momentarily before he lunged again.
Across the arena, the first bottle of water began its flight toward her. The machine was steady and true in its courseâa rare feat that disappointed you, given the dronesâ tendency to crash. The small fleet that followed was more unpredictable. As soon as Lucy Gray spotted them, she stopped retreating, patting the ruffles of her skirt over a pocket, checking for something. Then she pointed at the drones, shouting, and succeeded in turning Jessupâs attention toward them.
Jessup froze, his eyes bulging with fear. The drones closed in. He batted at them but failed to connect. Then they started releasing the bottles of water. The impact of the first smacking into the seats sent him into a frenzy. When the contents of one splashed onto his hand, he recoiled as if burned by acid.
He turned to flee, bounding down toward the field, but another dozen drones arrived and bombarded him. Since they were programmed to deliver directly to the tribute, there was no escaping them. He flew toward the front row seats, his foot caught, and he tripped forwardâhurtling over the arena wall and onto the field.
The sickening crack of snapping bones filled the speakers. The audience gasped. Even you felt queasy. Jessup had landed in a rare pocket of the arena with good audio. He lay on his back, motionless except for the heaving of his chest. The remaining bottles rained down on him, his lips curled back, his eyes locked unblinkingly on the bright sun glinting off the water.
Lucy Gray darted down the steps and hung over the railing. âJessup!â she shouted.
You werenât interested. You were tired. You wanted to go home. So you did. You told the Gamemakers to keep things running until the students left, then dismissed them as well. And with that, you made your way out of Heavensbee Hall.
(Summary: Pregnancy supposed to be one of the most joyous moments in life, knowing you're going to be parents. Turns into Coriolanus's nightmare.)
Word Count: 1.3k
Masterlist : Request Info
(A/n: Working on Beauty & The Beast au rn!!)
(Warnings!: Rough pregnancy, talks of abortion, LOT OF angst but with a happy ending! Maybe slight ooc Coriolanus, he actually loves you!, cute moment with Tigris!)
~~~~
"I have something to show you." Coriolanus said taking your hand, you smile as he walked you towards a door. You stopped at the door eyebrows snitched together.
"Hey you okay?" He asked looking at her with slight concern. Y/n nodded smiling slightly. "Hmm morning sickness again?"
"Y-yeah I think- ah!" you shouted slightly as suddenly a sharp pain going through you your hand going to your stomach as you start to crumble to the floor in pain.
Coriolanus's eyes widened as he wrapped his arms around you. He held you as you gripped onto his shirt.
~~~
Coriolanus opened the door once you got home. His arm wrapped around you.
"I want to see the surprise." You blurted out. Moving his arms from around you and walked towards the room you were previously at before..
"You need to rest-" "I want to see it." You said sternly looking at him Coriolanus looked back at you his jaw clenched as you turned away from him going into the room eyes widening as you saw a nursery.
"I had the avoxes work on it all week..." Coriolanus said at the door way.
You walked over to the crib picking up a small onesie that said 'Moms the best.' You bring the onesie up to your chest. Tears filled your eyes.
"I just need a minute.." Y/n sniffed leaving the room. Coriolanus looked around banging his fist against the wall before going after her.
Coriolanus felt like he was losing control. His worst fear ever since losing his mother was now becoming a reality in a cruel twist of fate for him and his beautiful darling wife. And he'd be damned if he lost his girl to the same fate his mother had faced. He found her looking at a picture.
"We can take a day before we go back to the doctor." Coriolanus said. Leaning against the wall slightly. Y/n sat the picture down.
"For an abortion..." She whispered, looking off to the side. Coriolanus jaw clenched.
"That's not wh-" "That's what it is!" Coriolanus looked at her eyes widened a bit at her outburst. She turned around looking at him.
"If you want to say anything about it Coriolanus. Then call it what it is." She said sternly. He ran a hand through his hair.
"How did this happen?" He whispered. She looked away slightly guilt.
"I-I had some pain earlier in the pregnancy.." She admitted. Coriolanus eyes shot up face Turing into one she never wanted to face and looked at her.
"How could you not inform me of this?" He asked anger slowly rising.
"Because I went to the doctor and they said it was nothing.." She said as tears slipped down her cheeks.
"T-this isn't nothing!" Coriolanus said coming in front of you.
"M-maybe it is.." She whispered. Coriolanus eyed her in disbelief.
"What does that mean?" He asked she looked at him. "It means whatever happens.. Happens." Coriolanus backed away angrily.
"You have some nerve.." He spat. Her eyebrows stitched together "excuse me?"
"We are not continuing this pregnancy. I'm not going to lose you because of it." Y/n came up to him.
"It's not an it. Alright? You saw its heart beat and the little tiny fingers and its toes." "Stop!" "No im not gonna stop okay?!"
 Coriolanus looked at her eyes filling with tears whether it's from rage or what she's saying.
"T-this is our baby Corio. It's you and me." She said taking his hand. "Are we really going to let them place odds on us? After everything that we've been through? Kidnappings, District 12, peacekeeping, the games, my family?" She exclaimed. Coriolanus looked at her with sad angry eyes .
"I can't lose you.. not li-" Y/n cupped his cheeks "you're not going to lose me like your mother. We are going to be fine.." she said taking one of his hands and placing it in her bump. "All three of us."
"Plus if I go. I will haunt your ass to make sure you never slip." She joked.
"How the hell can you joke about this and be so calm?" He asked but more liked seethed at her. She took eyes off her bump and looked into his eyes.
"Cause I'm scared." Y/n said with tears slipping from her eyes. Coriolanus eyes softened before eloping her into an embrace.
"But I have to believe that the odds WILL be in our favor this is not where our story ends.." She whispered, forehead pressed against his.
~~~~
7 months later...
~~~~
You were now very heavily pregnant at a gala that the doctor okayed you to go to Coriolanus was by your side all night. Checking on you as you were both congratulated as people gushed over the two of you bringing a baby. Into the world.
Now, you had just gotten home and Corio was walking you to the bedroom. A peacekeeper came up to you bowing his head.
"Mister Snow sir, I'm sorry to interrupt but you have an important call." A peacekeeper said.
"What ever it is. Im sure it can wait." Coriolanus said coldly. The peacekeeper gulped before taking a deep breath and saying who it was. Coriolanus sighed as he gave you a hesitant look.
"Go, I'll be fine." Y/n said giving him a small smile. He gave you a kiss on the head.
"This won't take long." Coriolanus said you nodded as he walked off with the peacekeeper.
You continued your walk to the bedroom before you felt a sharp pain and felt something slip down your leg to see blood. Your breath hitched as your body crumbled to the ground not hearing her name being called in a series of panic.
Tigris rushed into the hospital wing seeing Coriolanus with his head in his hands. She gulped walking over to him placing a hand on his shoulder. He looked up with teary eyes.
"I can't lose her Tigris.. not like.." Tigris shushed him as she brought him into an embrace. It was the first time since before the 10th anual games that she saw the actual him.
"You're not going to lose her Corio, y/n is strong a lot stronger than we know." And she was right.
 The odds did it in fact fall in their favor a few moments later Elorie Rose Snow was born the both of you healthier than anyone could imagined. Coriolanus practically rushed into your room seeing you sat up holding the small baby in your arms looking as beautiful and alive more than ever. You smiled at him as he came closer looking at you then down at his.. daughter. He let the last tear slip as he embraced you kissing your forehead and wrapping his arm around you.
"Oh y/n she's beautiful.." Tigris cooed at the very healthy new born resting in you arms.
"Would you like to hold her?" She asked. Tigris froze for a moment before nodding her head.
"Ellie this is your godmother and best aunt Tigris." Y/n said as she handed Elorie over to her.
Tigris looked at Coriolanus surprised and he nodded. Tigris eyes welled up with tears as she held the baby looking down at her now goddaughter.
"Are you-" "I'm fine.. im more than fine Corio." Y/n said looking at him as she leaned her head on his shoulder. Taking a deep breath as she smiled looking at their daughter and Tigris. Coriolanus kiss her forehead as Tigris handed Elorie back to Y/n.
"I'll let you two have a moment." Tigris said as she left the room.
"She's perfect.." Y/n said looking down at the newborn with pure platinum blonde hair.
  Coriolanus looked at Y/n then to his daughter. She looked like the perfect mix of the two of you. His heart swelled looking at her. He knew then that he could never truest hate her even when he almost lost you but he didn't. Here you three were okay and safe.
"I wanna grab both of your Shoulders and Shake, Baby say snap out of it.."
Masterlist : Request Info
(Summary: You start Dating a guy named Lucas and Henry gets jealous.. well because you are his and his alone and he doesn't like to share.. things get steamy..)
Word count: 1.7k
(Warnings: Not PROFF read, bad writing, Jealousy, smut, possessive)
~~~~
You were 20 when you started at the lab or well was forced, so that you could be one of the nurses. You were highly trained and freshly out of college being only at a two year school that had been year round school you had no breaks except a few weekends or for special holidays. Which was stressful but got the four years you needed to become a nurse before you ended up in this hell whole.
But there was a upside you had made good friends with the other nurse close to your age Shelly Wheeler she had helped you getting to know the office space. But there was one person that helped you the most and that was Peter/Henry you had met him on your first day. He had shown you around and since you both had grown a very deep connection..
Neither you or Peter/Henry expected this to happen especially not Henry, but he could sense something different about you. You didn't treat him differently than the others at the lab.. you weren't like the others at the lab at all.
Not like the other pests of the world..
Their was connection so deep that it went as far as sneaking into each others rooms late at night when you would have to stay late, long deep conversations, lingering touches, all the way to making out in the nurses office or one of the empty closets, and well also...
For months until, Brenner was starting to get suspicious. Which resulted to you not staying at the lab and instead going home immediately after your shift for. While he even had one of the orderlies walk you out as soon as your shift was over. To having one of them walk you everywhere. He had even threatened you with both of you getting hurt and even your family as well as friends.
So you had asked Henry to meet you slipping a note in 011s file handing it to him. He had came during everyone's lunch break and you told him that you guys couldn't do this anymore. That you couldn't do this anymore. You couldn't let him or your family and friends. He had tried to tell you that he wouldn't let anything happen but you knew or so you thought he couldn't do anything about it.
He guessed he had to try and wait ever so patiently for you to snap. out. of. it..
Before, he had left you kissed one last time or so you thought . Since then your days had been lonely and boring so when your one friend Alison out side of the lab said something about her setting you up with someone. You had excepted.
You, Alison, and Shelly were all very good friends so the night before your big date they had helped you pick out a stunning dress that you could change into after work before your date. You remember that night so well.. it was after your shift and you were just about to leave.
You were just finishing up a few finishing touches. Before the door open, you looked over your shoulder to see Him.
"You look stunning." Henry said , quietly coming up to you. You turned your head away sighing.
"What are you doing here?" You asked, trying not to get pulled in.
His fingers traced up and down your arm. You had grabbed his hand softly before turning around still holding his hand, before lowering it and letting it go.
"We can't do this.." you stated, while Henry eyes were flickering from your face to your body, taking in your form.. everything about you.
He hated that you of all people couldn't trust him and that you kept denying your wishes.. he wished he could grab both of your shoulders and shake snap out of it. And That you would snap out of it.
Before you had left, you told him you had a very important dinner to get too. He had grabbed your wrist spinning back to him before kissing you possessively then bring his lips to your ear whispering.
"Don't forget who you belong too..."
His voice was so dark and sinister like. Completely unlike the soft angelic voice he has. It made you shiver before you got your purse and left.
It turns out that Alison had set you up with Lucas. You had both been hanging out with each other a lot recently lately but never got to the date part.. well until now..
After that night, you both hit it off really well it was the perfect first date. You both had started dating.
Now, it's a few weeks later and here you are on your lunch break with Shelly gushing over your relationship.
"I can not believe you are dating Lucas! I mean you told me that you had hangout but how or when did that even start?" Shelly one of the nurses at the lab asked.
"I-I honestly don't know how or even when. It just happened. We just started spending a lot more time with each other just never got to the point of a date.. well until Alison." You replied, with a slight nervous laugh. While you could practically feel a certain someone's eyes burning into you.
 Henry was furious he overheard Shelly talking about you being in love or well near enough.. He just wanted to grab both of your shoulders and shake you to snap out of it. You were his and his alone.. the thought of another guy being with you or around you. Drove him wild..
 He was going to get you back.. and teach you who you belong too and make sure this time he doesn't let you out of his web..
 Once your lunch break was over you said goodbye to Shelly and started walking back to the office before you were dragged into a room that had been abandoned that you were passing. And Shoved up against a wall with harsh possessive lips attached to yours. You pushed them away already knowing that it was Henry. You looked into each other's eyes both filled with lust and want.
Snap...
 Before, your lips attached again harshly and passionately while he picked you up legs wrapping around. Arms held up. Clothes discarded. Henry's lips went down to your neck nipping biting sucking leaving marks all over you. While one hand went down to your slit and started rubbing in a circular motion earning those beautiful sounds he loves..
"It's time to show you who you belong too.. for good." He whispered in a dark husky tone, which almost sent you over the edge.
 Henry wanted to tear you apart. Make you his. Make sure you never think about another guy. Never let another guy touch or make you feel the he made you feel. He wanted to you to know who you belonged too. He wanted to snap you out of whatever you had with this guy Lucas. leaving him. Denying him.
Out...
 He ripped you off the wall and onto the floor before removing the rest of your clothes and thrusting into you at a hard fast pace making you cry out in both pain and pleasure. You got used to it quickly. Fluttering eyes shut before he grabbed your face making you look at him then making you look down. Making your eyes go wide and blow with more lust as he made you watch he fucked you. He lifted your head back while you breathlessly moaned eyes fluttering shut eyebrows furrowed.
 While you took him in feeling as his cock stretched you perfectly feeling how far he was in you feeling him hit your cervix. He moved a hand and presses down where the bulge of him in your abdomen. You gasped, in pain while he pulled your hair.
"Yeah you feel that?." Henry asked you whined.
"That's my spot.."
"I own it..."
"own all of it..."
"I own You.." Henry growled with each thrust. Making Your eyes rolled to the back of your head.
Of...
  He went faster up till the only sound was skin slapping noise coming from both of you and panting. You were about to come before..
"Nuhuh. Tell me Y/n who do you belong too?"
 Henry knew exactly what he was doing and he wanted to make sure you knew. Exactly. Who. You. Really. Belong. Too.
"Hmm? Tell me darling." He said with a hard thrust with his hand around your neck.
"Uhh.. you.. always you."
"No I want you to tell me who you belong.." he growled while biting your spot on your neck that gets you the most. You gasped in pain and pleasure.
"You! Henry I belong to you.." You cried out.
"P-please let me cum.." you begged. He smirked while slamming in and out.
"Come for me darling.." He whispered.
 You let out a pornographic moan loud enough he put his hand over your mouth as the knot in your abdomen burst sending a huge wave of pleasure and relief. He helped you carry out your high, while still chasing his high.
"Going to cum in you. Hmm.. you that you me to fill you up? Hmm?"
 You cried out.
"God your perfect." He started to slowly slow down thrust getting sloppier. Shoving himself deep inside you spilling his seed. Marking you as his once and for all.
And he finally made you Snap Out Of It..
It...
ABSOLUTELY PERFECTION as always!!
Me because every time theirs an update:
warnings: despriction of death
slow burn Coriolanus Snow x reader, slight Felix Ravinstill x reader
Chapter 14: Slow Start
The Capitol news found short-lived relief by streaming footage of the plaza in front of the arena, where concession stands had been set up to sell drinks and sweets to citizens watching the Games on two massive screens flanking the entrance. With little happening inside the arena, most of the attention ended up on a pair of dogs whose owner had dressed them up as Lucy Gray and Jessup.
You rolled your eyes. You didnât understand why people were so obsessed with themâespecially Lucy Gray. The girl wasnât anything special. She was a glorified carnival clown who just happened to be good at singing.
Bored and having nothing else to do but monitor the Gamesâwhich werenât progressing at allâyou barely noticed the approach of one of the Gamemakers until they cleared their throat beside you. You turned to see a frazzled-looking assistant clutching a clipboard.
âDr. Gaul is busy,â they said hastily. âShe needs you to do a quick interview with Lucky Flickerman.â
You narrowed your eyes. âWhy me?â
The assistant gave a helpless shrug. âBecause youâre available.â
You exhaled sharply. Of course. You had nothing better to do. Might as well entertain the masses. âFine.â
A few minutes later, you were seated across from Lucky Flickerman, who looked a little too relieved to see you. Heâd become visibly frazzled under the strain of keeping the coverage going despite the stagnant Games, and you figured he was desperate for any content to fill the gaps. The countdown beganâthree, two, oneâand the cameraâs red light blinked on. Lucky threw up his hands in bewilderment.
âSo, what gives?â he exclaimed, forcing a smile. âWhatâs up with these slow Games?â
You fought the urge to roll your eyes. Instead, you turned directly to the camera, ignoring his performative frustration.
âSome of you may be wondering about the slow start to the Games,â you said smoothly. âBut let me remind you what a wild ride itâs been just getting here. Over a third of the tributes never even made it into the arena, and those who did werenât exactly powerhouses. In terms of fatalities, weâre running neck and neck with last year.â
âYes, thatâs true,â Lucky admitted, still smiling, âbut I think I speak for a lot of people when I sayâwhere are the tributes this year? Usually, theyâre easier to spot.â
You could almost feel a vein popping in your forehead. You inhaled through your nose, schooling your expression. âPerhaps youâve forgotten about the recent bombings,â you said icily. âIn previous years, the areas open to the tributes were largely restricted to the field and the stands. But last weekâs attack opened up any number of cracks and crevices, providing easy access to the labyrinth of tunnels inside the arena walls. Itâs a whole new game nowâfirst finding another tribute, then luring them out of some very dark corners.â
Luckyâs smile faltered. âOh.â He blinked, visibly processing the explanation before quickly rebounding. âSo we might have seen the last of some tributes?â
âDonât worry.â You smirked slightly. âWhen they get hungry, theyâll start poking their heads out.â
Lucky didnât seem thrilled by the answer, but he pressed on. âThatâs another game changer, isnât it? With the audience providing food, these Games could last indefinitely.â
You arched a brow. âIndefinitely?â You let out a short, humorless laugh. âMaybe you can pull another magic trick to keep people interested.â
Lucky stiffened. He clearly didnât appreciate the jab at his little gimmicks, but instead of acknowledging it, he forced out a chuckle. âWell, letâs hope it doesnât come to that,â he said, recovering. âWe all want a good show, after all!â
The interview wrapped up shortly after, and as soon as the camera light clicked off, Lucky shot you a quick, dirty look before standing up.
You merely smirked back at him, entirely unbothered.
At 5 oâclock, Dean Highbottom dismissed the student body, but the remaining 13 mentors with tributes stayed behind, largely because the Communicuffs only worked through transmitters at the Academy or the Capitol News station itself. This also meant the Gamemakers including yourself had to stay as well, much to your annoyance. By 7 oâclock, a real dinner appeared for the so-called "talent." Your excitement and hunger quickly vanished as you looked at the pork chops and potatoes. The meat looked tasty and fresh, but all you could think about was Marcusâs corpse. The image of his lifeless body, left for the maggots, flashed through your mind, and your appetite disappeared entirely. Felix, however, had no problem digging into the food.
He shot you a curious glance between bites. âYou okay? Youâve barely touched your food.â
You shrugged, stirring your potatoes with your fork. âNot that hungry.â
Felix leaned back in his chair, dramatically sighing. âYou know, we had dinner plans tonight. Somewhere nice, just the two of us. No blood, no bombs, no corpse-inspired loss of appetite.â He gestured around the room. âAnd now look at us. Stuck here.â
You gave him a small smirk. âYeah, well, I didnât expect the games to go on this long either. But surely, theyâll only last another day.â
Felix quirked an eyebrow. âYou never know. Might stretch overnight.â
You exhaled, shaking your head. âDoubt it.â
âOptimistic as always.â He flashed you a teasing grin before going back to his meal.
As Felix finished up, some activity in the arena pulled the mentors back to their seats, and you decided to stay with them, trusting that the other Gamemakers could handle things for a little while. The Gamemakersâ screens showed Circ, the District 3 boy, crawling out of a barricade near the entrance. He looked around before waving someone forwardâa small, scruffy girl with dark, frizzy hair scrambled after him. Above them, Lamina, still napping on the beam, cracked one eye open to assess their threat level.
âNo worries, my sweet Lamina,â Pup cooed at the screen. âThose two couldnât climb a stepladder.â
Apparently, Lamina agreed, because all she did was shift into a more comfortable position.
Lucky Flickerman appeared in the corner of the screen, dabbing a napkin at his collar where a smudge of blueberry clung to his chin. âFor those just tuning in, our District 3 tributes are finally on the move! Thatâs Circâthe boy who claims he can ignite things with his glassesâand, uhâŠâ Lucky glanced off-screen for a cue card. âTest⊠Teslee from Three?â
âSheâs being mentored by our ownââ Lucky looked off-screen again, searching.
âThat would be our own Urban Canville,â grumbled Urban from the first row. his parents were some sort of scientistsâphysicists, maybe. Urban was ill-tempered and universally resented for his perfect calculus scores. You, in particular, had a small rivalry with him, since last time you checked, he was just one point behind you in class rank.
âHonestly, could they get a professional?â you muttered under your breath.
âUnfortunately, we didnât see Turbanâuh Urban and, Tesleeâat the interviews,â Lucky said quickly, clearly flustered. âBecause she refused to speak to me.â
âSomehow immune to his charms,â quipped Festus from the back row, earning a round of laughter. Even you let out a small snicker.
âIâm sending Circ something nowâno telling when Iâll see him again,â Io announced, working her Communicuff. You noticed Urban doing the same. You shot the Gamemakers a look that silently screamed, Donât mess up the drones this time.
Circ and Teslee skirted around Marcusâs body, crouching down to examine the wrecked drones from earlier. Their hands moved delicately over the equipment, assessing the damage, probing over compartments most people wouldnât have noticed. Circ pulled a rectangular objectâyou thought it was a batteryâfrom one of them and gave Teslee a thumbs up. She reattached some wires, and the droneâs lights blinked to life. They grinned at each other.
âOh my!â Lucky exclaimed. âSomething exciting happening here?â
âIt would be more exciting if they had the controllers,â Urban muttered, though he looked a little less irritated.
The two tributes were still examining the drones when two more flew in, dropping bread and water nearbyâthankfully, without crashing this time. As Circ and Teslee gathered their gifts, a figure appeared deep in the arena. They consulted briefly before each grabbing a drone and scurrying back to the barricade.
The figure turned out to be Reaper, who ducked into a tunnel and emerged carrying someone in his arms. As the cameras focused in, you recognized Dill. She looked smaller, curled into the fetal position, her sun-dappled skin drenched in sweat. A wet cough brought a strand of bloody spittle from her mouth.
Felix leaned over. âIâm surprised she lasted the day.â
You hummed in response, feeling a pang of pity. She was already dyingâa slow death by disease. Putting her in the Games was just adding salt to the wound.
Reaper stepped carefully around the debris from the bombing, carrying Dill to a sunny patch of ground and laying her on a charred piece of wood. She shivered despite the heat. He pointed up at the sun and murmured something, but she didnât react.
âIsnât he the one who promised to kill all the others?â Pup asked.
âDoesnât look so tough to me,â Urban scoffed.
âSheâs his district partner,â Listeria reminded them.
âSheâs almost dead now. Tuberculosis, probably,â Urban added.
That quieted everyone down. A bad strain of TB still cropped up in the Capitol, barely managed as a chronic condition. In the districts, it was a death sentence.
Reaper paced restlessly for a moment, either eager to get back to hunting or unable to bear watching Dill suffer. Then, he gave her one last pat and turned toward the barricade.
âShouldnât you send him something, dummy?â Vipina asked Clemencia.
âWhat for? He didnât kill her, he just carried her. Iâm not going to reward him for that,â Clemencia shot back.
You, who had been avoiding Clemencia all day, decided youâd made the right choice. Something was off with herâmaybe the snake venom had altered her brain.
âWell, I might as well use what little I have leftâitâs hers,â Felix said, tapping at his cuff. Two bottles of water flew in by drone. Dill didnât even seem to notice them.
A few minutes later, the boy from District 7âthe juggler, Treechâsprinted out of a tunnel, his black hair flying behind him. Without breaking stride, he grabbed the water and disappeared into a crack in the wall.
âA last drink for her,â Felix mused.
âThatâs good thinking,â Vipina said approvingly. âSaves me money. I donât have much to work with.â
The sun sank toward the horizon, casting long, crimson shadows over the arena. High above, the carrion birds wheeled in slow, lazy circles, their dark silhouettes stark against the fading light. Below them, Dillâs frail body convulsed in the throes of a final, violent coughing fit. A gush of blood soaked through the front of her dress, staining the fabric in a macabre bloom. You swallowed hard, horror and revulsion twisting in your stomach as the life drained from her small, fragile frame.
Lucky Flickermanâs voice cut through the tension, his usual airy tone laced with the false solemnity of a showman. âAnd with that, our dear Dill, the girl from District 11, has succumbed to natural causes. A tragedy, no doubtâbut that, my dear viewers, does mean the end of Felix Ravenstillâs tenure in these Games.â He brightened, clearly pleased by the segue. âPerhaps we can hear a few final words from our departing mentor?â
Someone pulled Felix out from Heavensbee Hall, and a camera zoomed in on him. He didnât look particularly upset. If anything, he looked resigned. âWell, it isnât a shock, really,â he said with a careless shrug. âThe girl was on her last legs when she got here.â
âI think itâs enormously to your credit that you got her through the interview,â Lucky said sympathetically. âMany mentors didnât even manage that.â
His words made you feel sick. A girlâa child, no older than twelve or thirteenâhad just died. And not from the Games, not from a weapon or a trap or another tributeâs hand. She had died from an illness, something that had been festering long before she ever set foot in the arena. And FelixâFelix didnât seem to care.
Heâs his fatherâs son, you thought. The man who keeps the Hunger Games going. The man Felix idolizes and wishes to become.
You wondered if Luckyâs high praise had more to do with Felixâs bloodline than his mentorship. But you shook the thought away as the cameras cut back to the arena. The sky had darkened completely now, leaving only the faint silhouette of Laminia, still perched on her beam. Dean Highbottom dismissed everyone, advising mentors to bring a toothbrush and a change of clothes for the future.
One by one, the mentors approached Felix, shaking his hand and congratulating him on a job well done. Most of them meant itâtoday had bonded them in a way few outsiders would ever understand. When it was your turn, you hesitated, then finally stepped forward. âCongrats,â you said, though the word felt hollow in your mouth.
Felix grinned. âFor what? Getting my tribute killed by tuberculosis?â
You rolled your eyes. âFor making it through the day. Though, I guess thatâs a pretty low bar.â
He chuckled, but his gaze softened. âYou heading home?â
âYeah, Iâm gonna walk.â
Felixâs expression turned incredulous. âWhat? No. Itâs lateâitâs damn near nine oâclock. Iâm not letting you walk home by yourself.â
You sighed. âFelix, Iâll be fine.â
âJust let me call you a driver,â he insisted. âCome on.â
You gave him a flat look. âReally, Felix?â
His jaw tightened, and for once, there was no humor in his voice. âPlease.â
You exhaled. âNo. Seriously. Iâm walking home.â
He studied you for a long moment, then nodded reluctantly. âAlright. But call me as soon as you get home.â
âFine.â
He hesitated, then leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before pulling away. âBe safe.â
You gave him a small, almost reluctant smile before turning and heading out. He watched until you disappeared into the night, then climbed into his waiting car.
You had barely taken three steps when a voice rang out behind you. âMiss Royce! Miss Royce!â
You turned, frowning as a Gamemaker came running out of Heavenâs Hall, his face pale. âWhatâs going on?â
The arena was quiet. The tributes had all bedded down for the night. Nothing should be happening right now.
âItâs urgent,â the Gamemaker panted. âDr. Gaul needs to speak with you immediately.â
Your stomach twisted, dread curling through you. âWhy?â
âShe didnât say. Just that you need to come. Now.â
Something was wrong.
Without another word, you followed them to a waiting car. The drive to the lab was silent, save for the hum of the engine. No one explained anything. They didnât seem to know, but their nervous glances and stiff postures told you everything you needed toâDr. Gaul was angry. And that was never good.
When you arrived, you were ushered through the sterile halls, the scent of antiseptic burning your nose. The moment you stepped into the lab, you knew something was very, very wrong.
Dr. Gaul stood by a monitor, her expression thunderous. The moment her eyes landed on you, she barked, âYou need to put a leash on your deluded, demented friend.â
You blinked. âWhat?â
Dr. Gaulâs hands slammed against the monitor, and the screen flickered. Your breath caught as the image became clear.
The arena. Butâno.
A figure was inside. A figure who wasnât supposed to be there.
âSejanus,â you whispered. Your stomach plummeted.
âHow did he even get in there?â you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. âWhy is he in there?â
Dr. Gaulâs face twisted in fury. âIâm working on finding the Peacekeeper he bribed to let him in. Once I do, Iâll remove their tongue myself.â Her voice dripped venom. âIn the meantime, someone needs to get him out.â
You stared at her. âSend Peacekeepers. What do you expect me to do?â
Dr. Gaul leaned in, her eyes gleaming. âOh, I expect you to go in there.â
A chill crawled up your spine. âYou canât be serious.â
âI will not have these rebels making a mockery of my Games,â she snapped. âIf the districts see us lose control of the arena, it might as well be an invitation for revolution.â
You barely heard her. Your mind was racing. Sejanusâwhat was he thinking? And more than that⊠who else was in there with him?
Dr. Gaulâs voice yanked you back to the present. âIâll freeze the feed for an hour. Thatâs all the time youâll have.â
You didnât answer. You couldnât. The shock had rooted you to the floor.
Dr. Gaulâs eyes narrowed. âWe donât have time for this. Move.â
Your heart pounded. You couldnât do this alone.
Your hands trembled violently as you reached for the nearest phone and dialed a number you had known all your life. You pressed it to your ear, but your grip was unsteady, slick with sweat.
âHello?â
âCoryo,â you gasped, barely able to force the words out. âI need you. I need your help. Now.â
There was silence on the other end. Then, cautious, âWhat? Y/n, whatâs wrong?â
âLook at your screen,â you choked out, pacing in frantic, uneven strides. Your breath came in short, panicked bursts. âPlease. Justâjust look.â
You heard a shuffle, a pause, then a sharp inhale. âWhat the hellââ
âMeet me at the arena,â you rushed out. âRight now.â
âY/n, slow down, tell meââ
âNo, Coryo, we donât have time for this!â you snapped, your voice shrill with fear. âJust get to the arena! Please!â
âY/nââ
You slammed the phone down before he could say another word.
Time was running out.
Some Ideas/Requests I had for Coriolanus snow! (Any one can make these because Iâm not good at writing plus Iâd prefer someone elseâŠhehe) also all female reader!!
1. Coriolanus snow x fem reader: During the hunger games you and Lucy come across careers and during the amidst of fighting trying to fight them off the reader sacrifice herself to save Lucy, not only leaving behind her best friend (Lucy) but also leaving behind her love (Coriolanus)
2. Jealous Coriolanus x fem reader: where the reader and Coriolanus used to have a fling but they ended it. (You can decide the reason) and the reader ends up with one of finnick odairs ancestors and Coriolanus gets jealous (and if you do smut you can make it into smut.
3. Peacekeeper Coriolanus snow x fem reader: The night Lucy performs the reader also performs and is just as good with the guitar and has a very captivating singing voice. Which makes Coriolanus awestruck/starts falling for her.
4. Jealous Coriolanus Snow x fem reader: the reader and Coriolanus are good friends for a while and maybe heâs had feelings/has been slightly pinning after her, both of them are mentors and the reader gets a very nice hot guy as her tribute and they become attracted to each other and coryo gets jealous
5. Coriolanus snow x reader: the reader was a tribute not that long before the 10th hunger games but during her games she had unknowingly did something that the capital did not approve of and she gets reaped back into the games but she doesnât get a mentor because of the capital/peacekeepers doing the dirty work themselves they decided to put her back into the games and instead of snow falling for Lucy gray (his tribute) he falls for the reader. And during the games Lucy asks the reader what happened to her and she tells Lucy that after the games they had killed her family and sold her (like what happened to finnick & Johanna! If not comfortable yâall can leave that part out or come up with something else)
6. Coriolanus snow x fem reader: itâs when the attacks happen the reader gets hit and becomes unconscious but instead of snow looking for her (his gf?) he more worried about Lucy gray and he doesnât realize that the reader is their next to him in the wing until after he knows Lucy is okay. Maybe the reader is in a very bad condition and had to undergo a surgery.
7. Coriolanus Snow x fem reader: where sheâs in the games and she sings safe and sound by Taylor Swift to her fellow tribute, while their dying (like how katniss did with rue) and snow is just in awe and canât take his eyes off the screen. (Maybe you were part of the capital and was thrown into the games because of your family?Âż)
(I have more but all that I can think of rn!)
POV: Peter/Henry/001 has come to take back whatâs hisâŠ
âOh, Y/n I told you Iâd come back for you.. didnât I?â