Ian Telling Us The Shourtney Wedding Is Real Is Like The Snake Convincing Eve To Eat The Apple.

Ian telling us the Shourtney wedding is real is like the snake convincing Eve to eat the apple.

More Posts from Duckthepatriarchy and Others

2 years ago

By The Light Of The Second Moon

A Darth Maul x AFAB!Reader Fanfiction

By The Light Of The Second Moon

“You dream all night long. You dream of the sun, of the stars and the moons, of war-torn, far away worlds. You dream of fruit and water and light. You dream of the unknown galaxy. You dream of Maul. And finally, you dream of a place that lies beneath the deepest part of the most violent ocean, at the centre of the universe, and how freeing it would be, to be trapped there with him.”

By The Light Of The Second Moon

SUMMARY: You have spent your entire life on a quiet planet, leading a safe yet unfulfilling life as the daughter of a surgeon. The arrival of a mysterious ship threatens that safety, and you soon find yourself befriending a dark and dangerous soul. As your attachment deepens, events more monumental and complex than you could ever know unravel around you. You soon learn that the only solace you can find is in the hours spent with your dark lover, by the light of the second moon.

Female/AFAB!Reader x Darth Maul romance. Set before the events of TPM. No use of y/n. Includes smut.

RATING/WARNINGS: EXPLICIT.  This fic is strictly 18+ due to sexual content.

There is absolutely no graphic/gratuitous depictions of violence or non-con elements. The 18+ rating is for the smut! However, please see the beginning of each chapter for specific CW/TWs in case of your own personal squicks. Please take care of yourself.

WORD COUNT (SO FAR): 112k

A/N: This is a multi-part, (currently) work in progress/incomplete fanfiction - an f!reader!insert x Darth Maul romance, that includes a lot of smut. Chapters are updated as frequently as possible - this fic does have a full plan and will eventually be completed. The art featured in the above graphic was drawn by the ever wonderful @elledjarin. Thank you my darling!

Moodboards (made by me): The Ship / The Woods / The Sketchpad

MINORS, DO NOT INTERACT.

By The Light Of The Second Moon

{Read all chapters on AO3}

Each chapter will be individually uploaded on Tumblr at the same time that it goes live on AO3. I do my best to update every 2-4 weeks. All are linked below ↓

Chapters:

Summer and the Moon

The Shadow of The Woods

Beautiful, Cruel Man

In The Trees, An Electric Feel

Devastatingly Wicked

Inside Your Mind

Of The Rains and Of The Dreams

Me, Only Me

Life In The Dark, It’s Who You Are

The Broken, The Damned

You Know, You Always Knew

A Force of Truth

Fear of the Water

Never Let Me Go

Your Power

Memories and Lies

To The Eye of The Storm

All That Glitters

Lonesome Swan

Farewell

Epilogue: By The Light of The Second Moon

By The Light Of The Second Moon

By The Light of The Second Moon Playlist:

check out some incredible art and edits inspired by this fic!:

stunning artwork created by the wonderful @elledjarin:

Darth Maul / Secret Sketchpad

beautiful birthday gifts by the lovely @kimageddon:

BTLOTSM Moodboard & Maul and Reader Art

a NSFW swoon-worthy birthday art gift by the amazing @the-chains-are-the-easy-part:

NSFW - BTLOTSM

incredibly beautiful edits made by the darling @stardustbee:

BTLOTSM Edit / Feeling

such a gorgeous and fantastic aesthetic board made by @gods-and-monsterss:

BTLOTSM Aesthetic Board

huge shout-out to my gorgeous friends for these pieces!!!! thank you so much for the time and effort you spent on your fanart/edits/gifts. they are beautiful and you mean the world to me! ✨💜🌜

By The Light Of The Second Moon
4 months ago

Chalkboard Hearts - S.H (Coming Soon)

Chalkboard Hearts - S.H (Coming Soon)
Chalkboard Hearts - S.H (Coming Soon)
Chalkboard Hearts - S.H (Coming Soon)

Single parenthood is no easy feat, but you and your daughter Abbey seem to be making it by just fine. That is, until the morning that you drop your daughter off for her very first day of elementary school and meet her teacher for the year: Mr. Harrington.

Contains - strangers to friends to lovers, slow burn, early-mid 90's, teacher!steve harrington au, single!mom!reader, parenthood

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV - Coming soon!

9 months ago

rip keith sorry i thought you were a serial killer

1 year ago

There are ships & then there’s balls deep destiel

There Are Ships & Then There’s Balls Deep Destiel
6 months ago

one of my deepest darkest secrets is that the taggie x rupert relationship dynamic is literal catnip to me it hits every time. give me rakish older man who's so ruthless he scorches the ground of any place he's ever called home and then goes back to his empty life in his empty house and tries to remember how to be human, put a girl in front of him who's so genuinely good and unsullied and a little vulnerable and so sure he can be better than who he's always been that she almost makes him believe he can do it too and then - and this is crucial - make it so he absolutely cannot touch her no matter what. and then sit back and watch me implode

1 year ago

Chemical Reactions (P. 1)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy as J Robert Oppenheimer x Student Reader

Warning: Smut in later parts, Age-Gap, Infidelity 

Words: 1,867

Note: The fic is spoiler free and fantasy. 

image

It was just before Christmas when you took up a scholarship at Berkley and, since you were young woman at the tender age of twenty-two, you still could not believe your luck.

You got in to one of the most sought-after courses in the US when it came to quantum physics, which was a field so new and progressive that, to many, its attributes appeared to be rather absurd whereas, to you, it was a way of understanding the world.

Keep reading

10 months ago

THIS IS WHAT THE DRUGS ARE FOR | spencer reid

good riddance x spencer reid one shot series masterlist

summary; when no one else helps spencer’s addiction after being kidnapped — you do, and you offer him help as a recovering addict yourself

warnings; mentions of kidnapping, early seasons reid, around the time of his addiction to dilauded, mentions of suicide, mentions of being shot (pass tense during a case) mentions relapsing, addiction to opioids mentions of being addicted to oxycodone, drug use, overdoses, hurt x comfort, angst, not a lot of romance but its sweet, fem reader, normal criminal minds stuff. mentions of the team completely ignoring spencers addiction bc that was messed up.

an; honestly this was difficult to write as a recovering oxycodone addict, a little bit self indulgent.. whoopsies!! but in honour of 5 years sober 🤗🤗 (i am too open with my issues on social media) this is probably horrible

THIS IS WHAT THE DRUGS ARE FOR | Spencer Reid

‘This is what the drugs are for. Turn the lights off on the comedown I still get emotional, when I think about your old house. Hopefully, the high, works to change my mind’

You noticed quicker than you wanted to admit. It wasn’t like you could pinpoint a certain point, maybe it was when he turned back at you after standing up from the dead body of his kidnapper and you saw the way his pupils blew, something guilty behind them — maybe thats when your concern started.

You knew for certain when his focus was in and out daily. You knew everyone on the team had their suspicions, had the gut feeling that there was something more to the tiredness in Spencer’s eyes. You knew more than you wanted to admit.

Your hands twirled the pen on your fingers as your eyes stayed fixated on the male sitting in front of you, you watched as his hands came up to scratch the inside of his elbow. You knew the motion all too well, like muscle memory.

Your eyebrows furrowed as you heard Hotch ask a question to which only Spencer reid would know the answer to. You shifted your gaze slightly as you leant back in your chair, at his lack of response and focus.

It took Hotch saying his name a second time for his gaze to pull and a small apology to leave his lips. Hotch repeated the question and you watched as it took a minute too long for Spencer Reid’s all to long ramble to start about the detail.

Normally, someone would make a teasing comment about how Spencer had to think about it, but the tension stayed among the group as they all noticed the same thing — yet no one did anything about it.

You knew the feeling well, and it made your skin itch in anger.

Rossi handed out jobs, inviting you to stay back with Spencer to help with case work. You looked at Spencer noticed his eyes dropping, it made your chest ache.

Everyone else had left leaving you and Spencer in the conference room. Your gaze stayed fixated on him as his mind fell in and out of focus. You had to admit if you didn’t know Spencer Reid as well as you did, he hid it well.

“How long?” You muttered out, as your eyes pulled away from his to skim the case. You could feel his gaze on yours and you could practically feel the heavy breath that left his mouth.

His words came out snappy, but you knew he didn’t mean it. “What?”

You looked up at him again, seeing his gaze on yours, his pupils constricted and you could practically see the way his hand was twitching not to claw at the inside of his elbow.

You knew he knew what you meant, you knew he was playing dumb. You pulled the same thing for years. If he wanted to play the game you’d play, and you would outplay him every time. “How long have you been using?”

His face twisted up, he could’ve been an actor.

“Im not.” He pushed out. His voice betrayed his face, as it went an octave higher. For someone so smart you’d think he would know how to lie — but he didn’t, not well. Not to you. He could tell you didn’t believe him from the way your eyebrow quipped. “I don’t know why you’d think that.” He added, trying to sound convincing.

You hummed, “Your pupils are constricted for one. You aren’t focusing, you are all depressed. Oh and you’re slurring.. By the way” You pointed out with your pen in your hand directed towards him. You watched as his face fell for a split second. If you weren’t paying as much attention as you were you might’ve missed it.

But you were paying attention.

“Im just tired— and I have allergies ” He lied. It made you want to laugh at the familiarity of all his lies, the same ones you remember thinking you were so smart for thinking of in the moment so many years ago.

You let out an unconvinced ‘mhm’ as you nodded your head. You watched as it dawned in his eyes that he had been called out. You wondered if maybe he enjoyed the fact that no one pointed it out, until now, until you.

“I had allergies too, for a long time” You stated out simply, playing his game, outplaying him. Your goal here wasn’t to make him feel ashamed, in any way. It was purely to let him know that he wasn’t alone.

You remembered feeling so alone.

He spluttered slightly, his eyes widened the slightest bit. “What?” He breathed out, confused because he never would’ve guessed. You knew that. You knew the person you were now was nothing like the person you were a few years prior. You hid your addiction well but you were changed as a person, and you weren’t nearly the same person you were before the addiction.

You offered him a small smile, “I know an addict when I see one Reid, I know the addiction. I know your skin feels like it’s crawling right now and your head is probably spinning because you are going through withdrawals. I know all the lies, I used them all before” You said softly as you lean your forearms against the table; your eyes softened as your gaze stayed fixated on his.

You watched the words slowly process through his head. Slowly but surely he seemed to understand. He cleared his throat uncomfortably. “How- How long have you known?” He asked, his voice small, evident how confronting this conversation was for him — but he needed it. He needed to know he had someone in his corner.

“I had my suspicions for a while. I wanted to be sure before I said anything..” You muttered out as you reached across the table to take his hand in yours comfortingly, “I was waiting— hoping someone else said something, I know I’m not your first choice of a person to help you through this — but I am here” You said softly.

You weren’t not close to Spencer. You were, close in age, had similar interests and you two got along well. The childish crush you had on him remained buried in between your ribcage — that was the thing about being an addict, it made you a good actor. You could act your way through any feeling.

He almost coughed at your words, his hand tightening around yours as you gave him a supportive squeeze. “Im- Thank you. I-“ His words seemed heavy on his tongue as his head shook. “I’m glad it’s you.” He said honestly.

You offered him a soft smile. You could almost see a question weighing on his mind, “What is it spence? What do you want to ask?” You prompted him, knowing his mind was properly almost complete fog at this point, overtaken by cravings.

“What- What were you addicted to? When?” He asked, eyebrows pushed upwards as if he was trying to figure out the timeline of your addiction, it caused an uncomfortable bubble in your chest.

“I was an oxy’s girl” You said, you knew it wasn’t funny but it seemed as joking was the only way to get through talking about this no matter the unsettling feeling it left in your stomach.

You exhaled heavily, “I started taking them in college after a surgery.. and well- I got addicted, obviously.” You ran your free hand through your hair as the memory dwindled in the back of your mind. Spencer’s hand squeezed your hand softly, making a half hearted tight lipped smile line your lips.

“I was clean when I first started here.” You said, fingers fidgeting. He listened with as much focus as he could with your words — you didn’t take offence to his half out of it mind. You couldn’t. “I relapsed after I got shot and they put me on them — no one knew about my addiction and I was too embarrassed to admit it to the doctors in front of the team, I relapsed once I got out of hospital.” You stated honestly.

You remembered it clear as day, after four years sober, the day you relapsed still stayed engraved into the walls of your mind freshly. You had been shot in the shoulder on a case, you were rushed to hospital and put on oxycodone and other pain medications immediately while unconscious. When you woke up and asked what they had given you, the team was standing around your bed so all you could do was nod, the relapse happened after that.

Spencer’s hand tightened on yours as his face pulled with guilt when he realised he didn’t notice. He opened his mouth to apologise but you cut him off, already knowing what he was going to say. “It’s okay.” You said, tightening your grasp on his hand mirroring his grasp on yours. “I mastered my lies by then, after years and years of lying to everyone around me.. I knew what worked and what did it.. I did it to myself” You spoke honestly.

He chewed on his lip as his gaze adverted to the table. You held his hand tightly as you felt it twitch slightly. You knew he wanted to scratch his elbow and you knew why. Your face softened all over again.

“It’s not worth it Spence. Trust me.” You said, voice heavy with honesty and you meant it more than words could explain. “You get mean, really mean, you lose yourself more and more everyday. Its not worth losing everyone around you, its not worth losing yourself” You gaze stayed on his face even when his eyes avoided yours.

You heard the shaky breath leave his lips, and then his hand left yours as his pinched his eyelids, trying to stop the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes as he squeezed them shut. It made your stomach ache.

“It- Its so hard” He said quietly. You didn’t think you had ever experienced heartbreak like hearing his voice break. Any sort of pain you felt in your life didn’t quite compare to seeing him fall apart from your words.

“I know- I know” You instantly stood up from your seat as you walked around the table towards him, he stood up as well and before you could do anything his hands were around your waist, pressing his body against yours and his head into the crevice of your neck. You arms wrapped around him without a second thought.

You could feel his tears against the skin of your neck, they were hot and thick. Your hand ran across his back gently. You always thought you’d know exactly what to do if this moment ever came to be — but you didn’t.

Words died in the back of your throat as all you could do was hold the boy in your arms as he let out the quietest soft sobs that made a gut wrenching feeling settle in your bones as goosebumps ran over your skin.

“I- I want to stop — I want to- How did you stop?” He said, wiping his face as he stood up straight, arms pulled back by his side. Your heart ached and your skin burned.

You shook your head, “Do you remember when I had to take emergency leave for family emergency?” You asked, eyes looking up into his that gleamed wet and dreary. It pulled on your heart strings and uncomfortable amount,

He nodded briefly, after he took a long moment to try to recall. You nodded back, a sigh leaving your lips. “I- Um.. I overdosed.” You stated, trying to speak stronger than your voice allowed you to. “I was in hospital for two weeks, connected to machines and wires — forced to speak to someone everyday until they deemed me healthy. I didn’t tell anyone- no one knows” You continued to shake your head.

“Do not let it get to that point Spencer — Shaking on the floor and literally frothing at the mouth, feeling so cold but not even functioning enough to know what being cold is, is not want you want. I know it feels good now — but you are going to kill yourself whether you want to or not if you keep taking it.” You spoke clearly, wanting your point to be perfectly clear. It was not worth it.

He held guilt behind fogged eyes, guilt that he didn’t notice, guilt that he almost lost you — literally and he had no idea. That you were alone during the lowest point of your life and he had no idea. He allowed your words to cloud his mind for a moment as they worked to overpower the cravings that were working to controlling his system.

“i- I don’t- Im sorry.” He stuttered over his words as he failed to think of anything better to say. Your face fell briefly as you wrapped your arms around him again.

“Im here? Okay. We will do this together day by day. I am here and I’m always going to be here Spence.” You comforted non the less.

He needed it and you needed him

2 years ago

fuck we gotta hear a song before the match?????

i am old and tired just give me my wrassle please


Tags
10 months ago

SydCarmy Ao3 Recs

note: this is going to be a super long post, you're welcome. (you can find more through my Ao3 profile (berzattohugs) also i don't know some tumblr usernames, but if you do please let me know so i can tag them! happy reading :)

legend: ongoing | completed | multiple works

get ready for a gapers' delay if you're heading down Sheridan Road, folks! (Find an alternate route if you can) by anxiety_croissant (@anxietycroissant) and turbulenthandholding (@turbulenthandholding)

“Carmy, sorry but… this is the first day off we’ve both had in weeks, and I got Lisa to trade shifts with me so I could spend time with you. I never see you anymore,” Claire complained, sighing softly. “I know The Bear is important to you, but like, we’re important, too. Right?”

sydcarmy through claire's perspective

the million little things by peachybunnybabie (@ethxocore)

favourites: like kasama (marriage of convenience au), the constant (six things carmy loves about his girlfriend), the support (six things sydney loves about her boyfriend, our thing (sydney and carmy celebrate christmas together)

avenues all lined with trees by oysterknife (@purposechef)

“you're a lifesaver,” the mother-of-the-bride gushes. “I didn't want to go with just anyone. The groom is a bit of a foodie, so I wanted a caterer who could impress.” Syd is about to call it quits for good on Sheridan Road. But then she gets a last-minute request to cater a wedding.

yes, chef by shareece (@bootlegramdomneess)

favourites: food is a universal language (Carmy and Sydney are two peas in a pod.) you are what you eat (Some time after the grand opening. Life is lifing. Carmy is in therapy. Sydney is being a supportive partner. Richie is going to Italy and really it's all about making connections.)

rules for fake dating an italian by poorlittlegreenie (@poorlittlegreenie13)

wanted: Female, aged 20-30, to be my date for Christmas eve dinner with my Italian family. Must be willing to eat my mom’s cooking. No physical intimacy required. No strings attached—I will drive you home after. 4pm-10pm, 12/24. Salary negotiable. Call Carmen: (773) 555-0901.

a new take on faith by linascribbles (@laviejaguardia)

the fridge guy’s name was Terry. They got the lock replaced a few weeks ago. There are no more torn tapes on the containers. The pans are on the right side. They hired a new line cook that doesn’t do meth. Nat’s belly is getting bigger by the second. Carmy hasn’t mentioned Claire since friends and family. Syd and Carmy haven’t really talked to each other in weeks.

if i didn’t love you, it would be fine (I know that’s a lie) by melodicchaos (@pacinglikeghosts)

when placed in a series of events based in misunderstanding, carmy and sydney decide to start fake dating. however, when real feelings get mixed with a relationship formed on carefully crafted lies, they realize they may have bit off more than they can chew.

copenhagen (let me go home) by turbulenthandholding (@turbulenthandholding)

6 months after The Bear opens, Carmy goes to Copenhagen for a short guest stint at Noma before it closes and realizes some things about his life back in Chicago.

scraping together by mila_milax (@milamilamilax)

is it fucked up to ask out the caterer at your brother’s funeral? Probably. But today is already pretty fucked up, and he’s done it now.

a need to amuse and enjoy by sashafiercer (@sashafiercest)

Sydney and Carmy learn how to offer each other amusement and enjoyment that will last the rest of their lives.

there we two, content by puzzlepuppy (@sydneys-adamu)

carmy, sydney and the adventures of cat parenting.

do me a favor? by onlytheredumbrella

sometimes we bypass the red flags and say, "Why shouldn't I make a baby with my best friend slash business partner?"

small plates by novelsandnoodles

favourites: as you wish (Richie and Natalie notice that Carmy loves saying no. Except when it comes to Sydney.), you put me on (Carmy lends Sydney his sweater. It’s far more distracting than either planned.), I don’t wanna look at anything else (a soft morning with Sydney and Carmy leads to a life altering question.), forgotten lunches and forgotten kisses (Sydney left home this morning without her lunch or her goodbye kiss. Carmy has come to give her both.)

soul meets body by turbulenthandholding (@turbulentandholding)

Emmanuel is unable to make himself say the words to his daughter: you, somewhere, have a soulmate, and the permanent marks of their life will be written across your skin for all of yours, just as your life is being written on theirs. No, I don't know who or how to find them. No, I don't know why. It's like magic, baby, in this sad and awful world of ours where magic does not exist and bad things happen all of the time.

the mark of a lover is patience through time by 924inlegend

five times Carmy and Sydney are mistaken for a couple and the one time it isn't a mistake anymore.

in another world it’s still you by puzzlepuppy (@sydneys-adamu)

favourites: the singing of a body (soulmate au), this heart with all its changing hues (rewind in time, sydney and carmen meet at CIA. it's not an instant friendship.), wind and water; cloud and fire (soulmate au)

my stomach's all in knots by sunflowerayo

Claire isn’t dumb. She wouldn’t have gotten anywhere in life if she was. Surviving in East Chicago, becoming a trauma nurse, all of it. So Claire knows she isn’t imagining the tension between her boyfriend and his business partner.

forever by noangeleitherr (@noangeleither)

a story of Sydney and Carmy's relationship and building love and life around grief.

take care by oysterknife (@purposechef)

Ingredients: - 1 culinary school dropout - 1 recently fired CDC - 48 hours in New York City

Steps: 1. Have a panic attack; drop out of culinary school. 2. Accidentally become the head food critic of the New York Times. 3. Write a review that gets the CDC of Eleven Madison Park fired. 4. Let sit until you have an emotionally unwieldy mess.

commute by somberiety

“i love a matcha. I always try to make one at home with the-” she makes a whisking movement with her fingers, sweeping in her imaginary mug. He mirrors the motion softly at the back of her neck, curtains of black and blonde sway by his fingers. He feels Sydney trailing into his touch and seeks more. He’s so fucking needy in the middle of this packed running metal tube.

inspired by that video from the baseball game

housed by your warmth by amiera (@amieraisposting)

favourites: it's all for you, everything i do (Syd and Carmy's journey navigating pregnancy.), bubbles (Carmy and his daughter stumble upon a kitten during a rainy day.)

don't be alarmed if i fall head over feet by romancier

love is blind au

pot & kettle, hand in glove by shroooms

five times claire has a hunch, and one time her hunches are confirmed

stay with me wherever you go by puzzlepuppy (@sydneys-adamu)

carmen (emotionally balanced) and sydney (also emotionally balanced) are well equipped for long distance and handle it very very well and very very normally. not.

taking the long way home by ogigia

sydney trying to be a normal adjusted adult who doesn't have feelings for her business partner technically boss coworker maybe best friend definitely the best kisser she has ever encountered.

child with a child pretending by emilybrontay (@emilybrontay)

Before she meets Carmy, Sydney has a baby.

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