Fashion Meme With The Batfam 

You know the “Dad, How Do I?” YouTube channel? Yeah, that, but with Red Hood, and they’re unlisted videos that Crime Alley residents share with each other.

It started with goons stealthily taking videos of Red Hood ranting about shitty drug quality that they upload under the title “Boss on drug quality control,” primarily for other goons so that anyone can tell if the supplies have been cut with something and don’t need to waste time asking Hood.

Then videos from civilians start popping up too, featuring Red Hood lecturing street kids titled things like “RH on staying warm in winter” and “RH on how not to get mugged.”

Memorably, there’s a video titled “RH on classic literature (y’all did RH go to college???? Is our crime lord a lit major???)” where Red Hood imparts upon some kids the importance of reading. After a very positive reception, the uploader goes back to Red Hood, asks about a book they’re reading for school, and gets a whole lecture on themes and whatnot. It does numbers and becomes a series, and this time Hood knows the camera exists (he’s always known they exist, he just couldn’t be bothered to acknowledge them) and actually talks to it.

(Jason will do anything to help these children, whether it’s giving them a leg up in school, giving the street kids who aren’t in school some semblance of an education, or teaching them how to shank someone trying to traffic them.)

Red Hood never uploads any videos himself, but it doesn’t matter. Crime Alley crowd sourced its own version of Khan academy and it’s better for it.

Gordon meeting the 1st Robin

Batman: Commissioner Gordon, I'm here.

Gordon: Finally—

Gordon noticed the young black-haired boy next to Batman, dressed in a bright and colorful hero suit.

Gordon (pointing at the kid): Who's that?

Batman: The child next to me?

Gordon: No, the Bat-Signal. Yes, I mean the kid!

Batman looked down at his Robin, who is mesmerized by the bright lights of the Bat-Signal. Batman turned his to face Gordon.

Robin (waving): Hi!

Gordon (slightly concerned): Hey, little kid. Oh, you're so cute. I'm just going to talk to your guardian for a second.

Gordon looked directly into Batman's eyes with a judgmental stare.

Batman (unaware how odd this looks): What? Is it the costume I gave him because that was his idea.

Gordon: Oddly enough, that's not my issue; he looks adorable in it.

Robin smiled while swaying back and forth.

Robin: Awww, thank you!

Gordon (frowning): Batman, I can forgive you for many things. The numerous parking tickets that you haven't paid for your Batmobile, the fact that I had to install a giant Bat-Signal on the building and you have not paid me the rest of the money for that yet, and even the time that you hit a fire hydrant and left a note saying ‘sorry'.

Batman (interrupting): I am sorry about that, by the way.

Gordon: Doesn't fix the fact that you haven't paid me for that either! Not the point, why is there a precious child next to you?

Batman: Well... I have a sidekick now.

Gordon: You have a seven-year-old!

Robin (offended): Hey, I am 8!

Robin held up both hands with four fingers on each of them.

Batman: He's 8 and an orphan. Not as weird.

Gordon took a deep breath, trying to accept that this is reality.

Gordon: I should not have to explain to you how that is not better! That's infinitely weirder, not going to lie.

Batman (hiding his embarrassment over his bad wording): I am now becoming aware of how this looks, but he is legally adopted by me. That is all you need to know.

Gordon (taking a deep breath): I have so many follow-up questions, and as a cop, I need you to answer a few of them. I won't be mad if they don't lead me to arresting you because I do kind of like you.

Batman (taken back): Oh... Thanks. Do I have to tell you, though?

Gordon (sternly): Yes.

Batman (relenting): I didn't kidnap him. I legally adopted him after his parents died, through no fault of my own—I realize how weird that sounds, but it's true. I took the kid in, and he's my... son—ch—wa-sidekick! Yes. It's not weird! It's not. He just needed a home. He's a good fighter too. Right, Robin?

Robin (confidently): I can do flips and tricks!

Batman: Yes, he can do flips and tricks. I like him so far; he’s... he’s neat.

Batman patted Robin on the head. Robin smiled giggling.

Gordon (smiling softly): Aww... Dang it, that is cute. Just don't get him hurt, okay?

Batman (sheepishly): Mm hm... Definitely did not have to deal with him getting eaten by a Venus flytrap. Twice. Yeah, we dealt with Poison Ivy earlier this week.

Gordon removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes in frustration.

Gordon: Right... He's walking across the edge of the building, by the way.

Batman (not turning around): Yep, he has a lot of energy.

Robin: This is awesome!

Batman spotted the child flipping on the ledge effortlessly. The new father groaned.

Batman (monotone): I'll go get him.

Batman reached out to grab Robin, but the lively young boy leaped off the ledge and darted away, laughter trailing behind him. Gordon observed the scene in confusion as the normally reserved Batman sprinted after his mischievous youthful partner.

Gordon (wistful): My kid is hyper like that... I hope she got her milk tonight.

Gordon wiped an imaginary tear from his eye.

Batman (trying to grab his son): Robin, stop running!

Robin: No!

Batman: Dang it, child! Stop!

Robin: No! I want to play!

Batman: The night of patrolling isn't over yet.

Robin: I'm hungry!

Batman: I got you McDonald's earlier!

Robin (demanding): I want more McDonald's!

Gordon (chuckling): You get used to it. Tell him you'll punish him if he doesn't listen.

Batman stopped running, realizing that this could work.

Batman (sternly): Robin, if you don't stop running, I will make sure you have no cookies for dessert at dinner tomorrow!

Robin stopped running, huffed, and went back to Batman's side. The little hero crossed his arms, pouting.

Batman: Thank you, kiddo.

Batman patted the boy on the head again. Robin giggled and hugged the man's waist, surprising the adult hero.

Gordon (smiling): Okay... I'm not too worried about this anymore.

Second Robin

Third Robin

When Bruce met Bernard, he was skeptical. He respects Tim's choice of partner don't get him wrong, but something about the boy triggers his paranoia.

Bernard is on his way to getting a dual PhD in physics and biology. (Rouge gallery are mostly doctorates)

He spouts conspiracies with passion. (Some were close to the truth and contain details that a normal civilian shouldn't know)

When discussing said theories he has this manic look in his eyes. (also this child is an ex-member of a pain cult)

It didn't help that one day when Bernard was visiting Tim is the manor the boy casually said "You know Gotham's cave system are so interesting. They span across the city and from my research, bats tend to migrate here, especially in the area around Wayne Manor." (Bernard was working on a conspiracy about how Batman is actually an alien pretending to be vampire by mimicking bats and failing.)

Later that night, Bruce has Bernard's profile under the 'potential rogue list' Right next to Tim's name.

Headcanons for human!Toothless

- He doesn’t remember his parents. He only remembers that he was always used to be alone from the early childhood.

- He was the first boy raised by dragons.

- Because of his thin build, wild habits and constant dirt on himself, he looked like a dragon, which made people take him for one of them.

- By the way, dirt could hide him in the dark, so that’s why he was called Night Fury.

- The meeting with Hiccup happened as it was in the canon, only without so much animal habits. Toothless just screamed wildly in his ear and ran away limping.

- If Hiccup lost his left leg, then Toothless lost his right leg. S-symbolism ✨✨✨

- For a long time Toothless was studying habits of a man who overstepped his principles and saved him and was learning the human language. He uttered his first words terribly.

- Hiccup taught him how to be a human again and Toothless became attached to his first friend for this.

- Stoick wasn’t immediately happy with the boy who was on the side of dragons, but when Toothless saved Hiccup in the last moment, Stoick accepted and also began to consider him as a second son.

- When Toothless became a resident of the village, he was washed and his hair was trimmed as far as the young man allowed. Yes, he manages to take care of his hair.

- He still loves fish. But when Hiccup fried it for him for the first time, Toothless couldn’t touch raw again. He genuinely loves fried.

- But he’s not picky about food.

- Toothless is 10 cm taller than Hiccup and so it remains until the very end (through the ROB/DOB, RTTE AND HTTYD2/3).

- In ROB/DOB Toothless can already pronounce sentences. However, they all are similar in type “I… Not to understand… Need to think…”.

- But in RTTE he has fully mastered speech.

- As a teenager he liked long hair, so he asked not to cut it. As a result, his hair was grown hair and still, he managed to take care of it.

 I think that’s all for now. The list will be replenished 💖

Would you ever expand upon your joker junior thoughts more? I think that was such a well written idea and would love to hear what else you think about it

Oh my god yes. 100000% YES!

That post before was more of an idea vomit, didn’t cover all of what I thought, so I’m happy to hear someone wants to hear more.

So, JJ’s always been a tough convo for Tim. Obviously. But it’s not just because of how traumatizing the Joker can be, or about the shocks and psychological torture. It also reminds him of a grim time in his life. With Bruce still going through the motions post-Jason’s death, and Dick frequently spending all his time in Bludhaven, he hadn’t been watched much. Save for Babs, ofc.

That’s actually why they’re so close. She’s much more emotionally competent thanks to her dad, lol.

JJ wasn’t only a big thing for Tim, but for Gotham too. In a place like this, it wasn’t hard for whispers from the Joker’s men to travel to civilians and cops. Everyone knew why Robin was nowhere to be seen. Everyone knew why Batgirl looked the way she did, agitated and worried. Everyone knew why the cops searched that same warehouse over and over, never allowing anyone inside.

Which was also why no one was happy to see Nightwing, very obviously the first Robin, return after yet another sabbatical in Bludhaven. Of course, that stopped a little after everyone collectively realized that, oh crap, he doesn’t even know!

This begins a collective effort by the more clear-minded people of Gotham to NOT disclose anything JJ related. There has to be a reason, right? No way were they going to force Robin #3 to disclose anything he didn’t wait to. It didn’t hurt that a year or two later, a mysterious figure named Oracle began effectively making every news article or picture related to JJ disappear.

Everyone holds their breaths for the next few months. What if what happened to the second Robin happened to him? What if he was too crippled to go back out?

As the Batfamily grows bigger, it becomes way clearer that Robin #3 hasn’t said a WORD. Not even after they grow closer, when the screaming and murder attempts and arguments cease. He doesn’t say a word, so no one else does either.

Tim goes to great lengths to medicate himself against any variant of Joker venom or gas. The familiar smells just… bring things back to the surface.

He tries not to act like Jason whenever the Joker gets out of Arkham. It’s already hard for everyone to hold him back from killing the monster. Jason doesn’t need some second-rate copy of his trauma trying to get sympathy. Unlike Jason, he didn’t die. He didn’t come back differently, or lose footing on his life, his job, whatever.

It would just be better if Tim acted as aloof and concentrated as he always did. Not make a big scene, and follow Batman’s orders to a T. No need to worry anyone.

Honestly, the only reason no one notices the literal war going on in this boy’s head is because he doesn’t want to cause a scene.

Oh, and if you’re wondering what he says when one of the bats finds him the next night, still avoiding them…

Yeah, he full on denies EVERYTHING. Looks whoever it is, Jason, Steph, Dick, straight in the eye and says that what they saw was fake. Edited. Something to threaten Bruce with years ago. Tim just ran because…because…Anyway, he’s fine. Don’t worry about Tim Drake. He’s fine.

Babs groans over the comms when everyone hounds on her to tell them everything. Like hell is she gonna tell them a single thing until she has Tim’s full permission.

It's actually funny how humans decided "fuck living in caves with all these creepy crawlies", got out of caves, built houses that have all the nice parts of a cave without any of the yucky parts, and then all the little bugs and spiders and other creepy crawly creatures that used to also live in caves thought "sweet, new and improved caves" and moved right back in with us.

Since we all agree that people of the Alley of Crime adore Red Hood and believe in him, I think it is time to imagine Jason in a scene similar to the one from OG Spiderman, where his identity is accidentally outted in front of crowd of people, and they all are just choose to protect him and help him out.

So maybe Gotham is facing especially nasty trouble, and vigilantes are on the receiving end this time. So maybe Jason is thrown at the dirty Alley in his part of town, wounded, with helmet flying off, and there is just a crowd of people staring as bleeds out, astonished. And Jason thinks, oh, that's the end — he can go and shoot himself, honestly, because he just failed the man rule every vigilante have: never show your face, never reveal your identity.

But people are... helping him? His eyes are half-open, breath laboured and pained, but all he hears is gentle murmuring:

'God, he is just a kid...'

'He must be younger than my son.'

'Poor child...'

He feels soft elderly hand against his cheek as someone from the crowd, an ex nurse, comes closer to bandage his injuries, while a kid, barely with the size of his helmet, brings it back, sticking out their tongue as they try to place it back on his head, to hide his face.

'It is okay,' the old woman reassures him. 'You are safe with us, son. We hadn't seen anything.'

Jason's eyes sting, because, oh.

It is his people. He loves them. He will die for them.

And they love him just as much.

He still waits for someone to out him, though. But the week ends, the villain is out of the picture, and no one says a thing. The only proof that it ever happened is civilians, who keep waving at Jason — not Red Hood, just Jason — when their paths cross somewhere in the shops or streets.

And that's how he knows that it is them; it is them, and they keep him safe as much as he keeps safe them.

Don’t Mess with Tim Drake or his family will deal with you: Kylar

Wayne Manor - a spacious living room filled with elegant furniture. The afternoon sun casts warm shadows across the room.

Dick sat on the couch, a concerned look on his face. Tim sat next to him, visibly distressed and wiping tears from his eyes.

Dick (comforting): It's gonna be okay, Tim.

Tim (voice shaky): I usually can handle it, but… who the hell pours paint thinner on someone’s car?

Suddenly, the front door swung open with a loud bang, startling them. Jason strode in, exuding casual bravado.

Jason (playfully): Hey, assholes, how’s it—

He stopped upon seeing Tim’s tear-streaked face.

Jason (concerned): Why is Tim crying?

Dick (glancing at Tim): Somebody's been picking on him at work for being bi.

Jason’s demeanor shifted instantly, becoming serious.

Jason (intently): What?

Jason pulled out his cell phone.

Tim (sniffling): His name is Kylar. I reported him, but they say there’s no proof. I just have to wait and see what he does next.

A dry chuckle escaped Jason’s lips as he turned the phone towards Tim, displaying a photo of a frat boy type with a smug grin.

Jason (smirking): This him?

Tim (nodding): Y-Yes.

Jason (confidently): Sweet. He lives close by. I’ll be back.

Jason grabs one of Nightwing’s Escrima sticks and exits.

Dick (concerned): Where is he going?

Dick turned to Tim, who was still sobbing.

Dick (comfortingly): I’ll help you feel better.

Twenty minutes pass. Dick and Tim remain on the couch, the mood heavy.

Tim (regretfully): I should’ve never told them who Bernard was. Kylar made a bunch of homophobic jokes...

Dick (reassuring): Tim, it’s not your fault. This guy was always like that. He’s disgusting.

Tim (sighing): I’m sick of dealing with it.

Dick (calmly): Just tell Dad what happened.

Tim (defiantly): I can handle this on my own.

Dick (jokingly): What about giving him one quick bop on the face?

Tim (laughing softly): Violence isn’t going to help. I’d look bad.

Their conversation is interrupted by the front door slamming open again.

Dick (frustrated): Jason, seriously?

Jason returns, dragging a beaten Kylar into the room. Tim's eyes widen in shock.

Jason (excitedly): Timmy, I got a present for ya!

Kylar looks battered, with a black eye and bruises.

Jason (commandingly): Apologize.

Kylar (trembling): I’m sorry for what I said at work.

Jason (twisting Kylar’s arm): And?

Kylar (gasping): I’ll pay for the damages to your car!

Jason (menacingly): And you won’t bother him at work again, or I will ‘accidentally’ hit you with my car.

Kylar (defeated): Yes! Just let me go home!

Jason releases Kylar, who stumbles out, tears streaming down his face. He laughs as Kylar leaves.

Jason (turning to Tim): You good?

Tim (smiling despite the situation): Um... yes, actually.

Jason patted Tim on back then left.

Jason (over his shoulder): I’m ‘borrowing’ Bruce’s car for the day. Bye!

Dick turned to Tim.

Dick (apologetically): I’m sorry he did that—

Tim (smiling): On second thought… I’m glad he did something crazy this time.

Dick (chuckling): What happened to no violence?

Tim (light-heartedly): He’s more intimidating than both of us. Kylar got the message.

Dick (smiling): If he messes with you again, don’t worry—we’ve got your back.

Tim (softening): I appreciate that a lot.

The brothers shared a moment of laughter, the strength of their bond evident in the warmth of the living room.

more of the amnesia incident* au (first post)

these tags are from @solarkindred, thanks for the coolio headcanons my brotha 👍

also stink comic thing i unintentionally made it wasnt meant to be one

tags from @radioactiverats thanks for more coolio headcanons my guy 👍

tags kind related to this pic? like the yapping teenagers part ig yeah

(i had a fun time drawing his eyes here :D ) i think Meg is that one person thats so awkward and quiet and a COMPLETE LOSER when hes around people he doesnt know, but when he gets to know them more then hes legit unrecognisable like he goes from "oh, hi....." to "OMG HEY GUYYYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!" literally me with my school frfr

Don’t mind me, just thinking about a young, twenty-something Bruce Wayne guiding Dick’s hand as he learns to write his letters, teaching Jason how to ride a bike, putting Power Ranger stickers on Tim’s knees, leaving Tooth Fairy Money under Stephanie’s pillow, playing hide-and-seek with Cassandra, watching Damian play with dogs at the dog park, and helping Duke with his algebra homework on the kitchen counter. You know, dad stuff.