Cela Faisait Longtemps Que Je N'avais Pas écrit Quelque Chose... Mais Là J'avoue Que L'épisode 11

First kiss (Candy x Amber)

I really wanted to join in for idolcandy's Dykecember challenge, and even though we're already at the half of the month, it's better late than never! if someone wants to requests a pair for a specific day, my askbox is open ^^

Dykecember day 1: first kiss

Words: 1474

Candy's P. O. V.

My phone buzzed with a new notification.

why didn't you pick up? are you in class?

Ever since Nath left, Amber and I looked after his flat, especially Blanche. She has always been an independent lady, but her master's sudden and long disappearance didn't affect her well. It didn't affect any of us well. Even when she wasn't around, I hung out often in his apartment. I liked the quiet that I couldn't experience in the dorms, and I buried myself in my studies.

I tried to divert my thoughts. I didn't tell Rosa or Alexy what was up, but I'm sure they picked up after some time, as I continuously rejected going out clubbing or shopping with them. Rosa told me that I could talk to her anytime, but knowing her opinion about Nath, I rather kept to myself.

So who was left? Amber and Kim were the only two people who still kept in touch with Nath, but Kim was busy managing the gym. She also didn't know about Nath's ehm... business, and with Amber we didn't even feel it fair to tell her about it.

That left just the two of us, Amber and me. I still couldn't quite comprehend the change she went through. Those piercings eyes that I always found cold and condescending in high school, now they lit up when she saw me, always cheerfully greeting. The delicate fingers that carried out so many pranks on me, now I had the opportunity to watch them drum mindlessly on the tabletop while we're having lunch together. One hand would be enough to keep count of the times she behaved kind towards me, and yet now I found myself spending more and more time with her...

It feels wrong to even think about it, considering that she's my ex-boyfriend's sister, but there's something enchanting about her. When I'm with her, I cannot stop thinking about her plush lips and what it would feel like to have them on mine. When she's away, I'm nervous, waiting for the time we meet again.

How does hate turn to love?

Is it even love? I see who I want to see. I'm imagining a personality for her that maybe she doesn't even have. She has her own life, her own passions, her own problems. Hell, the only thing tying us together - Nath - didn't even use to have a good relationship with her until only recently. If she's not the cruel teenager who made my days sour, then I have no idea who she is beyond her worry and love for Nath.

I used to think we share that, but I'm ashamed to see that my heart is beating for someone else now.

My phone buzzed again.

hello?? anyone there?

The student in the row in front of me turned around to shush me. I guess he had had enough of my phone making noise...

This helped pull me out of my daydreams. Although I did spend much of my free time with studying now, I still couldn't keep track of Mr. Lebard's class. If there was a course for reading lullabies to adults, he could be the perfect professor for it...!

I muted my phone, then finally checked out the new messages. Amber has previously asked me if I was free to help her out sometime, as she's moving in to Nath's apartment. God knows when he's going to use it again, meanwhile Amber's model career isn't going as well as she hoped. To save some money, she decided to give out her flat for rent, and live in Nath's place for some time.

I offered to help her move her stuff, but due to our different timetables it wasn't easy to find an afternoon that suited both of us. I sent her a quick reply:

yes, I'm in class, but it ends in 5. I'll call you after

---

"I already found a tenant. She's moving in on Saturday, so I must leave tomorrow the latest."

"Wow, that was quick. Well, I don’t have any classes left today, so it's totally up to you. If you think you have too much stuff, we can ask someone else for help too. I'm sure Kim would be happy to join in, or maybe Castiel...."

What an idiot! I already forgot how big of a crush she had on him. It was partly the reason she was so hard on me. She misinterpreted my friendship with him as something more, and jealousy is never a good advisor.

Either the static of the phone helped hide the tone of her voice, or she was over him by now, as she replied completely unfazed.

"The two of us should be enough, I don't have that many belongings. See you tomorrow afternoon."

"That's perfect for me, alright. I'll meet you at your place. "

---

She was right, even with just the two of us we finished sooner than I expected. We talked while moving the boxes, to help pass the time. Only lighthearted topics came up, but it wasn’t the kind of small talk that makes even silence comfortable compared to it. I offered to leave once we were done with the actual relocation, to let her unpack alone, but Amber insisted I stay. She put on some music, and fished out a bottle of champagne from one of the cabinets.

"I bought this for Nath on our last birthday, although I know he’s not much of a drinker. It would be a shame if this got spoilt, am I right?"

I laughed a little while shrugging. "Well, I don’t think Nath would be mad…"

Amber unscrewed the bottle, and shook her head.

"You know what, I don’t want to talk about him. He made his own choices, whatever we think about them. I worry for him, and I know you do too, but he’s not a child." She handed me a glass, and took a sip from her own. "I’m sure two young ladies such as us can find a thousand better topics to discuss."

I couldn’t help but laugh, not missing to notice her wink in the meantime. I didn’t know what to add, so I took my glass, thankful for the "alibi" for not speaking.

"Soo… what are you going to do once you graduate? There’s not much time left until the end of your studies if I recall correctly."

"I never actually got this far when I was making plans for my future."

It was Amber’s turn to laugh, though she was more cynical than me.

"I get that, I didn’t plan this ahead either. When I started, I received two photoshoot offers for each one I did. I thought I was one of the few people who are lucky enough to skyrocket their career right from the beginning. Guess I was wrong."

Little by little, I had already finished my glass by then, and I felt a small confidence boost. I sat next to Amber, hugging her shoulders with my arm.

"I’m not speaking from experience of course, but I’m sure it’s normal to have ups and downs. The things we see in movies are romanticized, it’s never easy in real life."

I was so caught up in trying to comfort her that I didn’t even notice when she refilled both of our glasses.

"Yeah, I can second that. It’s never easy in real life…"

Maybe I was imagining things, but I had the impression that she was avoiding my gaze as she spoke.

I tried to recall all occasions we were together like this. Those late night phone talks, those seemingly meaningless strolls in the park, those "study dates" that always ended up being gossip afternoons. I never noticed until now, but sometimes she would mention her feelings of loneliness and being lost. I always thought she was the kind of social, confident, strong woman that they write motivational articles about in the newspaper. But I realised that it wasn’t only me who started spending more and more time with her; I also took up a bigger part of her life now than I did before. And while I wasn’t sure how she felt about this, I certainly knew how I did.

Mostly thanks to the liquid courage that the now three glasses of champagne gave me, I leaned in, half hopeful, half scared of her reaction. Amber didn’t pull away, and after a few seconds even put down her glass to place her hand on my thigh. Our kiss deepened, and I felt a sense of calm wash over me: whatever confusion I was going through in my life with my studies ending, my unknown future incoming, but also the consequences of Nath’s past threatening to reach Amber and me as well, now I knew I wasn’t alone with it.

Dykecember challenge

Ceci, your tags scare me

@vanillaamoursucrethings @marycecilyy I’m not even sorry

guys im not even joking i need more fanfics about castiel and armin PLEASE !!!!! Its not even funny im on the edge of ending it all 😔

I just logged in before going to sleep, and saw at least 10 mermay posts on my dash <3 immediate serotonin

is mermay still a thing?

genuinely curious, since uhhh it's already the 2nd of May and I haven't seen any mermaids yet, but I was kind of looking towards to it :c I even thought about joining, but idk what will happen about that one

or maybe I just looked in the wrong corners of the internet... hmm

(also, I think I can remember there were prompts like "storm" and stuff. but now that I think about it, I haven't seen prompt lists this year either.... damn I really hope this didn't die out, I liked it lots)

I'm thinking about having an AO3 account, and uploading everything I've written there... and also start writing there as well

it would be actually useful, because I never know how to write things in as little words as possible, and AO3 is better for longer writings

I could also just simply learn how to write properly hahah

on the other hand, I have fanfiction ideas, and Tumblr is not the best platform for those...

I can 100% relate, the writers you listed were my favourites as well (hell, they were the main reason why I even signed up on this site). steph-writes started making her own games, it’s understandable that she doesn’t want to write for other fandoms anymore (though it’s a bit still sad that she deleted her MCL writings T-T), while I don’t even know what happened to otome-aeriie?? she kind of just disappeared, I think

luckily, not everyone quit the fandom! there are still a bunch of talented writers on Tumblr, such as

Tetrakys (hehe, I won’t tag her, I’m sure you know her)

@marycecilyy

@idolcandy (she’s on AO3 as well)

@otomes-and-tears

@centralsaints (though they write mostly on AO3, as far as I know)

@melodyalanaroster (she mostly writes about her own OC, but that doesn’t mean at all that she’s not talented!)

@vanillaamoursucrethings​

I think this is all?? I hope I didn’t leave out anyone. I know some other people who write sometimes, or just used to, but these people are still active in the fandom ^^

Okey, so I have a question.

I was out of tumblr for a while and when I logged in for a first time i noticed a change. Why is no one writing any MCL fanfictions? You, steph-writing and otome-aeriie were my favourite writers, I was coming back to your stories all the time and it was my favourite guilty pleasure. And now they both wiped out all of their MCL fanfictions and you also stopped writing MCL stories. I dont want to be disrespectful but is there any specific reason why it happened? I saw that there was a time when girls got some hate for their work but I loved them so much. I miss those times..💔

Hey happy to see you online again! I hope you're doing well.

I can't speak for other people, but personally i just lost interest in writing, it was a funny experience while it lasted but it has never been 'my thing'. I've never felt like a writer but I'm really grateful you and other people liked my writing 💕 I still write short dabbles sometimes, but small things and only when inspiration strikes, which is rare. (Incidentally I made a post about it yesterday but it was buried under dozen of comments on the latest episode)

Dispair not though! There are still people who write in the fandom! I've been very busy this past year so I haven't kept track but MCL writers if you see this post feel free to comment/reblog with a link to your masterlist so people can find your works :)

it's totally okay if you can't write for all characters!

I struggled a lot with Lance as well but I was like "meh, I got this request, I'll write it, let's just see what comes out of it". and you can end up loving the character (hehe, me) or hating them even more lol, but then you can at least say you tried!

if you feel like it, you can even make a list of characters you "recommend" people to request stuff from you with, so 1. you can practice writing without the headache ("OH MY GOD WHY DO I HAVE TO WRITE DOWN YOU'RE KISSING WITH MC, I DON'T EVEN LIKE YOU"), 2. your readers get more quality stuff as well!

(also, the "must write" list is a good idea, maybe setting *slight* deadlines can help out with it as well - nothing too serious though, because you might feel like you're "failing" or something if you can't fulfil it, or at least that's what I do lol. but something like "I want to write x headcanons this summer", I think that's doable! I'm trying this myself as well right now hahaha)

I need to do a “must write” list of things that I would like to write just so I can get to them after I someday (at somepoint, whenever, please please brain) finish all the Valentine’s day requests that nobody remembers anymore that I need to finish, but I do, and ppl think now I’m full of shit, just because apparently I’m unable to write anything romantic with Hyun. 

I just recieved an ask, “ 11, 13 and 14 ^^ ”, but sadly the anon didn’t write who they want it about

so hey anon, if you see this, could you send me a new message with the character? thank you, and I’ll try to hurry with it ❤️

First of all: I saw the new Kinktober requests and I wanted to say thank you! It really means a lot ❤️ autumn break starts in the middle of the next week for me, so I’ll be able to write them soon

Second of all (and totally unrelated): how should I write an email to a game company? I want to report a bug, but I’ve never written any formal emails before and idk how to phrase it

take my uquiz???