Crystalbrain-flower Of Aerisithe NFT 1/1
crystalbrain-flower of aerisithe NFT 1/1
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check it out! there was this girl i fell in love with but it was dumb because i knew she was going to die because some motherfucker on a website called square.net from liek 1997 ruined the scene just liek i'm telling u what happens in the game, but it was a game that is forever known as FINAL FANTASY VII, and it looks bettah in caps because fuck yeah, capital letters.
but anyways this brain had its nervousity system hooked up to a tv and it was SHIT because he was playing this game and REALLY lieked this character a LOT, but he totally knew she would be KILLED. and her name was……..don't look if u haven't played the game…AERIS.
yeah i guess its a plot point that totally remaps ur psyche into thinking the girl with ancient healing powers and shit needs to totally die by some named after a bunch of spheres that grow on a tree in a mysticital tradition, but these guys made SO MUCH MONEY fucking with my little brain. i totally couldn't believe that they had this guy with a sword just come down from the sky all cool liek but then he just KILLS AERIS. what the FUCK. if i were human i'd be in 7th grade and be liek, ok, i'm traumatized.
but what else was going on besides FINAL FANTASY VII? there was a lot of popularity with STAR WARS, which is a franchise owned by disney now and they've leik totally fucked it in the ass i heard but i didn't bother to watch, but they got these dudes called SITHS. leik, darth vader is a sith. and darth vader is totally the kind of guy who would KILL AERIS i guess, but maybe not? i don't know, but what if AERIS were a sith, leik she had healing powers but she could totally CHOKE YOUR ASS WITH HER FIST IN THE AIR.
then there is absinthe which is a kind of poisonous drink that fucks your brain cells in the ass and erases ur memory, so i put an E after sith to maek it liek AERISITHE
so put it all together, u got AERISITHE. a woman who's good hearted with ancient healing powers who fucking chokes her enemies tho and erases the memory of her demise and UNFUCKS the universe. and this is my tribute to this unfucking mind bender. THERE.
More Posts from Crystalbrain7 and Others
crystalbrain-kim jong un toilet 1/1 NFT on opensea
ok. so i was in kim jong un's meth lab he uses to ship shit to the yakuza and dennis rodman shows up with like this military garb and he's liek asking kim jong un how he looks and shit. and i'm like, dude, ur in teh wrong place, ur out of ur league, if u get any farther into this shit even van damme isn't going 2 come save u from the can of stalinist whoop-ass that kim jong un is gonna unleash on u. anyways dennis rodman looks liek i hurt his feelings and so i fuckin get give him this bump of 100% pure crystal and he brightens up liek a christmas tree. anyways, i just sort of let him show all these basketball moves that kim jong un's generals pretend 2 be interested in, and then after kim jong un smokes a chunk of ice he's liek ranting and raving about how he's gonna send another bomb flying over japan……into the ocean, just to fuck with them. and he laughs and he gives me this look liek i'm expected to laugh, so i'm pretending to laugh and i can hear the basketball in the other room…it was some serious shit, man.
anyways i ask for some food and he's liek "hell naw, i gave u some meth u don't need 2 eat" liek i'm some kinda dude who just because he's just smoked meth in north korea with kim jong un doesn't need 2 eat. wtf man, i'm liek trying to think of a way 2 get out of there and i'm pissed so i used my telepathetic mind powers and take over kim jong un's mind. then i instruct him 2 put his head in teh toilet and i give him a swirly. his head is all wet and shit and i liek take his pants off and there's leik some serious gay sex going on when dennis rodman comes in teh room with his rod out and i'm liek "dude, can't u see i'm givin the old swirly screw to kim jong un" and he's liek "ok, ok whatever". anyways kim jong un drowned in teh toilet so that was a nuclear crisis averted but the yakuza were pissed becuz they didn't get their meth shipments. however one of kim jong un's body doubles just fuckin started pretendin' 2 be the dear leader again, and i'm liek, "fuck. my work is wasted." but i think this guy doesn't have what it takes 2 be kim jong un becuz he's not a preening sociopath and i think this woman who runs the secret police wants 2 kill him already. we'll see how it goes. anyways i have 2 swim across a river to get 2 china but since i have superpowers it was easy. i even caught a bullet in my teeth and spit it back at a border guard and he flew all the way from china 2 seoul, south korea and all the south koreans were liek "wtf is this dead dude doing here"?
anyways i get into china and i'm liek trying 2 diffuse military tensions between the US and china now, so wish me luck.
crystalbrain-bull mitosis
[1/1] nft on zora.co (eth)
ok, so i feel like there is a strange, strange, eerie thing about this...like a god of bullshit or something is trying to reproduce his profits after putting his sperm in a bullshit egg. is this acceptable? we have become a society of bullshit, it's not hard to imagine that bullshit itself could be a subject of art. but this isn't just any bullshit, this is a really cool looking fractal representation of bullshit which begs to be traded among investors like the nest egg of a dude who bet all his money on TwatCoin or whatever shit people came up with. Is this acceptable for us who have to live with the financial fallout of a dude with like zero ethics sticking his dick in the ass of an obscene bull? I do not know. What was I even talking about, i have like seventeen psych meds to turn loose like ballerina dancers in my neurons, so pardon me while i take a chill pill. i guess you could say that i have a love-hate relationship with bullshit. it sometimes seems like our universe is made of bullshit, but it is not so, it is only the job of the bullshitters to make u think this so they can make u drink like, mandrake tea or something like that. are you still with me? i'm not still with me...bullshit has won this round.
crystalbrain-crown prince mohammed bin salman in the cannabyss 1/1 NFT on opensea
ok, so this crown prince guy is similar to liek some dude in the west who got too involved in reading stupid satanic books and thinks he's some machivellian nietzschean superman but he can't match my powers cuz i destroyed heaven and hell and its all my show man. this guy smokes way too much pot, liek i shouldn't talk becuz half of my time is spent hitting teh crack rock but this dude thinks he's so fuckin edgy because he smokes so much weed. i was liek, "dude, ur teh crown prince, u need to smoke crack liek all teh other world leaders" and he just was liek "huh?" becuz he was so stoned. and i was liek "dude, ur not cool enough yet, here, hit this rock" and he got so cracked up and he was all paranoid from teh weed and coke mixing together and decided to attack yemen…and then he tried to think he was the ultimate edgelord becuz he'd smoked teh crack and he talked about his political manoovering and i'm liek "ok, we get it, ur an asshole, we all are dude, get over it"
i'm not sure what to think of this guy, he needs to grow teh fuck up and worship me, becuz i'm his interdimensional crack dealer who has liek a limitless supply of crack and a huge dong, and he's liek sitting on motherfucking mammoth amounts of oil so i know he can fuckin buy some from me. but then he won't pass teh pipe when u smoke with him, he tries to power trip and starts showing off by liek having a journalist executed blatantly and i'm liek "dude, u r such a fuckin dumbass, real men smoke crack, put that marijuana shit away, its makin u paranoid".
now teh thing about crack cocaine is that smokin a lot of it maeks u reallly paranoid but this guy just talks about how i'm his nietzschean superman when i fuck him in teh ass, as liek an excuse for his homosexuality that he barely conceals with his edgelord wars in yemen and syria. what a fuckin douche, i really hate this guy; i hope his ancestors come to him in a dream and castrate him and he wakes up with no balls, becuz it wouldn't make much difference, this guy already has no balls; he's just givin commands. he doesn't even liek bdsm himself, he just lieks a vanilla assfucking and that's just boring these days, i can't get these dictators to do anything original, it's all "oh, i'll tell my guys to go get these people" and then they give 'em liek a few blowjobs and a few envelopes of cash and boooooom they think they're so cool.
dickhead.
crystalbrain-l'anus de cristal
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ok, sometimes i don't know whether somethin is a mouth or an anus, but this really looks like a big anus in the sky i guess. liek maybe its made of crystal, liek etherealeum? i don't know money, i'm not too rich so i try to use cryptographickalcurrency to buy myself a demonburger at burger king. i hear a lot about a merge which is somethin crystalbrain just tries to be cool and work with, because he's a smooth criminal liek that but not liek michael jackson having kids over for sleepovers because eww forget that. i suppose if u wanted to hear something intelligent to say u could say that money is shit. actually that might not be intelligent, but money turns everythin to shit i guess, including the internet, but i need it to buy a demonburger at burger king or maybe a venus fly trap burger at some other burger joint.
this is definitely some cool shit because it is made from crystalbrain's biography being turned into a kaleidoscope which ended up looking like a crystal anus. there was a lot of tweaking (not that kind of tweaking) and then it looked more anus-like, and then a gradient was put on the background. are u with me? be birthed like a turd into whatever lies beyond, maybe a golden toilet or somethin, i dunno.
crystalbrain-seaweed75 NFT 1/1
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ok did u ever see the matrix, i guess it was a movie? there was a lot of green digital shit goin on like a bunch of zeroes and ones fucking together in a black void of weird shit, it was a good movie. but imagine seaweed; if you get possibly vegan seaweed u can cover the sides of ur sushi with it, so its like a bunch of motherfucking sushi-sandwiching green-stuff. but if u look at seaweed in the matrix maybe it would look like this. why make art about seaweed?? i dunno, there's lots of renahsahns dudes who made like bowls of fruits for dollars by the new class of people created by money changing i guess. so i guess if u can make art about fruit of the loom or whatever u can make seaweed matrix art.
but oh know something is kinda fucked up about this art; no its not jpeg corruption, there's some fucked upness to this picture, and u can rest assured that it is not ur braincells being sodomized by seaweed in the brainus but some actually really intentionally fucked up stuff. like every post i must ask what the point is about all this? and i asked myself this and i didn't get a good answer but instead of feeling despair and putting a bullet in mah brain i decided to post this and tell u about the angst i feel in not having a good reason for this existing other than…
…i need to pay for the demonburger to eat at burger king which is teh flesh of demons i guess but its plant-based demons so whatevs.
crystalbrain-freedom 666 NFT 1/1 on opensea
ok, so the fuckin thing about this is that america gives liberty to do shit. liek, i know that we manipulate teh fuck out of people and do all kinds of bad shit to ourselves and other people, and we liek, committed genocide and stole the whole fuckin country, but there's liek this other side to stuff, liek about freedom and human rights. r we embarassingly full of shit? yes! but u can have whatever religion u want, u can be a christian, a muslim, some kind of weird witch, or just a hindu or an esoteric weirdo, its all allowed even if ppl will give u shit, which they're allowed 2 bcuz of freedom of speech. u can say all kinds of nice stuff, or not so nice stuff, but lately, some motherfuckers want 2 change all this shit, they want 2 force their shit down ppls throats, and that ain't happenin'.
the statue of liberty or somethin is a symbol of liek immigrants coming in 2 get harassed by cops in cities but its also a symbol of the good shit about america, before we blew it by trying 2 force our beliefs down each other's asses. there was a time not 2 long ago where u could be liek…hey, abortion? cool! sodomy? cool! and people would call u a bitch or gay or whatever, but at least u could get an abortion or not worry about some dickhead with insecurity in their masculininity fuckin shooting up teh place where u hang out. i mean, yes, america is totally full of shit, but i'd take the chance 2 say the good stuff about it, liek about how we can say shit, and maybe the government will bust u on drug charges even though i smoked crack with ronald mcreagan, but its mostly ok, u can say shit without getting thrown in a gulag.
so anyways, i usually talk about smoking crack with bush or how we smuggled oil in the caskets of dead soldiers or somethin but this time i just want 2 say: if u want to say "fuck u" to conservative values, u have the right 2, even if they try 2 turn u into a homeless crackhead. so inverted crosses r ok, havin the number of the beast is ok, it's freedom 666, u can be a weird edgelord dude or whatever and the cops won't arrest u although u might get watched bcuz of people eroding the right 2 be an asshole.
https://undefinedlabelnoise.com
crystalbrain changes his dumb ass over to opensea.io
ok, so crystalbrain is a dumbass of teh highest order, this has already been estabablished. BUT a smart move was to start selling his NFTs on opensea.io instead of a different place. check out these NFTs for sale (which have already been posted elsewhere, there are more 2 come in the future):
crystalbrain-anaeris dorisopen NFT 1/1
ok, so crystalbrain is not too smart sometimes, maybe because of all the crystals put in there like new age dudes.
crystalbrain posted an nft that they had already posted; dumb huh?
and in the post was something like the idea that someone had taken the nft onto an an anti-nft blog and posted it as free art and welll....
crystalbrain’s response was that, yes, basically, u can do that because these are just fucking images that people specoolate on but that you can buy the nft because...
uhm....
well....
uhhhhh....
let’s seee......
hmm....
buy crystalbrain’s NFT lol
now on to the descriptive text of this one:
ok, so i have a bunch of these freaking ghosts in my head i thought for a while. like u know those scientologists? well they're dumb i guess, but they think these alien fuckwad things called thetans attach to ur body like scotch tape or ticks or something. anywaaay, what i mean to say is that i am completely a lunatic, and thought that my memories were actually ghosts in my brain, like they had just wandered in and hijacked some neurons. then i started thinking, maybe these ghosts were actually just a joke, like all this stuff i remember, its actually a fucking joke like "why did the ghost cross the road? because it was haunting the chicken!" see? i just made that shit up, and maybe a ghost told me to do it. that would be really dumb new age bullshit wouldn't it? just being made of ghosts. like your 5th birthday party? just a ghost 5th birthday party? the first time u ever jerked off right? a ghost. like imagine just ghosts everywhere. like maybe u don't even have a body, maybe its just that a bunch of ghosts tell u that u have a body. see? i'm a smart thinker, hire me as ur cult leader and i'll tell u its ok to screw a lot of people.
https://zora.co/collections/0xb8642926904C3D27566e27A515971E2eacd65f5a/1
crystalbrain-dan quayle, savior of democracy 1/1 NFT on opensea
say what u want about dan quayle, he didn't get shot by jim jones and he didn't smoke our crack cocaine either. yeah, this guy believed our bullshit. i mean, he would be liek "no, no i don't want to cheat on my wife" but reagan and bush and I would insist, saying stuff like "well, this cock ain't gonna suck itself" 2 him and i guess he'd reluctantly comply. he was a real boy scout, and belieeve me, teh boy scouts are no strangers 2 sodomy. but this guy, we couldn't believe it, after bush would pull his dick out of his ass quayle would feel guilty about cheating on his wife, so we mostly kinda kept him away from teh dark shit we were doin', liek filling heaven with crack cocaine. yeah, he was a real moral kinda guy but he wanted that power, u know, 2 be a great leader and all that…fuck that, we were just about the money, crack cocaine, and hardcore, man-on-man anal sex.
but it turns out dat this guy coulda saved the illusion of democracy in america. yeah, i know, what the fuck are you talking about? i mean we ran the show with our three letter agencies, but this guy wanted ppl 2 be elected fair and square, so when that ass-clown donald trump had his brigade of neckbeard horse-porn masturbators march on teh capitol, vice president mike pence was supposed officially say that teh president was joe biden, and donald trump was reeeeally gonna throw him under the bus for that shit, becuz even tho it was teh democrats turn to unfuck things up that we'd fucked up, quayle was at teh certification during teh capitol riot and told mike pence 2 suck it up and say that joe biden was president.
so this guy, this fuckin boy scout, is one of the reasons u don't have trump as a dick-tater. so u have to give him credit for that.
crystalbrain-rectal trump NFT 1/1 on opensea.io
ok, so the thing about this is that this is teh RECTAL TRUMP, yes, this is what teh CIA wanted to do to donald j. trump, which is SHIT ON HIS FACE. this fact which is 100% true is becuz he was such an annoying sonuvabitch, we couldn't get him to do anything right. he had his own uninfoformed opinions about everything, he wouldn't listen 2 us or smoke crack, he was such a fucking shitface and this tribute is the 100% desire of crystalbrain to put FECES ON DONALD TRUMP'S FACE. yes u see him peering into eternity's rectum, and crystalbrain ate alternate dimensional versions of trump in order 2 send a huge amount of dump at trump. if u look closely u will see that the crap is made of TRUMP HIMSELF.
the thing about trump is that he's liek teh guy at the party who won't shut up. now i don't know about you, but here at crystalbrain's organization we take great pleasure in laying a log cabin on the faces of people who won't shut teh fuck up about how great they are. no, this is definitely what donald j trump had coming 2 him, he is totally covered in shit and this is a good thing for the future of humanity. we don't liek his ass so he gets 2 get a load out of ours!! we had 2 get minions 2 tie him down but in teh end it was worth it because teh stupid sonuvabitch finally shut up once he was choking on our excrement. imagine this for teh future of mankind: donald j trump UTTERLY HUMILIATED by SHIT.
don't even get me started on what we have planned for vladimir putin lol.
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crystalbrain is deadly serious about being contemptibly stupid and also making digital art.
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