SYNOPSIS: Kazuha, a well-known tailor in Inazuma, had a spouse. It's only a shame that his spouse is known for their 'infidelity' in his eyes. [ songfic ]
TW/S: Yandere tendencies, stalking, minor and major character death/s, emotional manipulation in a way, gore, violence, fire/arson, sewing... questionable fabric, unreliable narrator, shifting POVs, dead dove: do not eat, dollification, delusional thinking, Kazuha progressively loses it till the end, beheading, oh God this fic and tws are long Im so sorryโ
NOTE: During the fic, it is recommended to listen to "The Tailor of Enbizaka". It will make sense when you read through this fic :)
(also, I apologize if this took a while for me to write. I got busy and writer's block hit me :( anyways, second work and its the best boy! Though, I hope you all don't blame me for fucking him up. Also also!! This is very much a long, LONG ficโ like 2k+ long, so ๐ซก gl soldier, I'll see if I don't need to make this to a 2 part series)
(update: this fic took 6k words, good luck y'all, this one is a WILD ride)
In Inazuma, there is a tale that is shared by many about a crimson clad man and his lover.
The others never settled on what he looked during the day before his death, nor were they sure what his prior job was before he became a tailor. However, they always complimented him for his looks and his skill, knowing that whatever he used as his own special fabric would be tailored and taken care of well.
Even with one full of holes and tears, he is gifted with the ability to patch them up till it was brand new. In the village he lived in, he was regarded for having such a talent, and he had his shop open and full of visitors.
However, the only thing that made people question him was his behavior. Despite how mild-manner the tailor was, he often comments on how his beloved darling refused to come home and continues to cheat on him.
Many those that still lived during the time said the crimson-eyed tailor acted delusional, but just how far can those delusions go?
No one knows but the man himself... And the one who persecuted him, too.
It was that year since I've seen my beloved after the accident.
A year that, when I saw them, I've longed to see them and speak to them about our time together as a married couple.
To begin with, I am Kaedehara Kazuha, orโ as the townsfolk here call me, the 'Crimson-Eyed Tailor'. Although I am highly regarded for my craftsmanship, many told me that I am odd for my adoration for my beloved maple.
Why is it that odd? I thought all married couples do this, even if some think that it feels off.
Besides that, however, my darling isn't quite aware of my... Endeavors. More specifically, their streak of getting out for hours, perhaps days and weeks, and not even coming around to speak to me.
I am bound to them by an oath when we were married: we both drank sake together under that faithful light of the moon, with only nature watching over us. However, it would seem as if they have forgotten that, and ended up cheating on me in broad daylight.
Like they had no such shame.
Alas, I am but their husband, and I can't simply get mad at my beloved spouse. I know they did no wrong, for they sometimes meet with others as an act of being 'friendly'.
So while I focused on fixing the kimono, I've began to hear something that had been passed around in the village.
Something related to my darling's little ventures.
"I have spoken to [Name] about the matters in their marriage recently," one of the ladies spoke, her voice not so soft enough to conceal who she was speaking about as I fixed the fabric in my hands.
"And from what they told me, they're getting their kimono fixed for when their lover returns home!"
I simply continued on sewing, but the lady's next words had me flinch.
"Ah, they've been married for years, aren't they? And it seems they even have their shiromuku ever since their marriage to sir Kamisato Ayato. How romantic!"
...
The blood continues to spill on my finger, with the needle that I used pricking it when I've lost focus and got too careless.
How uncouth.
From the tale shared by the folks of Narukami Island, they talked about the crimson-eyed tailor's marriage with his supposed 'spouse': an immigrant of sorts from Fontaine, traversing to Inazuma to meet with their lover.
Their relationship together is strange. From the accounts of those with prying eyes, they said that he was the only one putting an effort to their relationship, and they wished to take it slow.
However, there are those that disagreed, saying that it had been the other way aroundโ and it was he who wished for them to slow down.
No one can decide what the tailor had done, for they can't even tell if his desires were to rush or to slow down. But what can be confirmed is one thing everyone kept saying.
He doesn't like his trust being broken.
It had been days after hearing what I did.
I hadn't seen my dearest beloved in those days, and the day I saw them had been when the heir of the Kamisato clan had returned.
I had been busy as ever in sewing till I realized that I'm running out of thread. I don't have any spares, and I'm well aware that there are a few shops that sell supplies for sewing.
And so, on a lazy afternoon, I've got out of my shop in the hopes that I can catch the store to buy the supplies I needed.
The soft sound of wood hitting the pavement greeted my ears, alongside hushed murmuring and discussing with the commonfolk. I greeted a few that noticed me in passing, but they were swift to return to the people they were speaking to prior.
It was a mundane thing, really. But it was the type that felt familiar.
Turning a few corners, I managed to locate the shop I was looking for. Walking up the stairs, I waved at the lady taking care of the storeโ
โnot before my ears perked up at the soft chattering in the distance.
My eyes trailed over to the source, and then, I see them.
My beloved maple.
I saw that they were conversing with the heir of the Kamisato clan, his hand reaching over to hand them a small gift: a small box, with the ribbon being the color of purple. I spot the gleam of gold on top of the ribbon, which eludes me to think that it is the insigna of the clan crested in gold.
How tacky.
I had to hold back the urge to stop them as their conversation was hard to discern, my focus back on the woman running the shop with the supplies I require.
"Hello, madame," I greeted, making the woman smile and nod in greeting as well. "Do you need fabric again, Kaedehara?"
I chuckled, but it was only to mask the bits of instability in my voice.
"Oh, not fabric, madame. I simply desire thread. I have ran out of red and black, and I didn't want to delay the commission I had from monsieur Lyney. Do you have any right now?"
"Red and black thread, hm? I can check at the back. Please give me a moment to look."
With a bow, the seamstress turned around to leave. With that, I let go of the breath I held and turned my gaze back to the bridge, just a few ways away from where my beloved sunset was at.
Watching the two figures, I couldn't help but simply stared at the attire that the heir wore.
Montsuki Haori Hakama: that usually means black or gray. I've known that colored kimonos were not worn with this in mind, and he certainly didn't wore anything that would be too straining.
Still, that shade of black is made of high quality. I'm not surprised if he wore it so rarely, as though to preserve the detail and its intricate work from his very own seamstress.
...
I wonder if I can take it?
Watching the two descend from the bridge, my eyes wandered back to the lady as she returned with the spools of thread, all varying in degrees of color and quality.
"Here you are, Kaedehara! These are the best I can find that fit the colors you asked for."
My eyes twinkled as I took the spools to my hands, my fingers turning and nudging the thread to see just how strong it is.
Interesting. Good quality, too... Maybe I can use this to finish that outfit I've been saving for a while.
"Thank you, madame," I thanked her, making her laugh. "Oh, it's not a problem, Kaedehara! You've done so much for this little town of ours, this is but a simple thing to repay for your efforts!"
With a nod, I paid the seamstress and turned back down to descend from the bustling upper part of the town, the sight of what happened in the bridge a bit further away bothering me from within.
No matter, Kazuha, I mused, carrying the items I required as I felt myself walk back home. Even if you want to get rid of him, it will be much too complicated. You simply need to be patient and wait till the opportunity comes.
...
Although, whoever made his clothes... I wonder if I can speak to them to inquire about their techniques.
The first case that started this was a cold one.
One that is related to a person no one knew so highly about, be it by their background, appearance, and even their name. All they were known for is being the 'tailor' for one of the clans.
There had been a lack of evidence and information about this due to how many tailors had been requested all across Inazuma at the time. It was understandable that people chalked up to them being missing as nothing more than an unfortunate case, not one worthy of being dug into.
Others had suspected that it had been associated with something else, that something (or someone) had done this deliberately. There was no evidence to this, but their claims were loud as they were bold, making it difficult to ascertain its authenticity.
However, the masses have all agreed that this was a normal occurrence. It was not one worth noting, because there had been a lot more that spoke of the same tale, always eluding to their fate being that they were murdered.
It was, unfortunately, the 'norm' of the village in the legend. A norm that, if the people of Inazuma heard it today, would have turned their heads in disgust for how abhorrent it sounds.
Still, many remained curious of the biggest what if that seem to echo in their mind.
Was the tailor associated with his sins?
The Kamisato clan has had it's ups and downs, and it isn't strange to see that they were seeking out talented tailors and workers to work under them.
What was surprising (to everyone), however, was that the head of the clan hired me to work as the Kamisato Clan's personal tailor.
The reasoning behind it was quite simple, especially with what the heir spoke to me when he and I met in the morning when I was to be summoned in the estateโ due to his personal tailor (a family friend, he said) going missing for days, they were unable to track down his whereabouts and presumed that he has gone missing.
I was only hired as a "replacement" for the clan's special tailor till then, and he made it extremely clear that there was nothing else to it. Nothing that would spell the fact that I will permanently stay in that position.
Of course, to many, this may sound as an odd deal. There are so many tailors such as myself that would die to be consulted on, to work as the head of the clan's seamstress and work for their outfits. And perhaps, in their naivety, they may consider it as their efforts finally paying off in some way.
However, I have been in a clan myself before. This is nothing more if not a business deal.
A deal between one rising clan, and one whose surname has lost it's widely known heritage.
This only benefits the Kamisato Clan in the effort to save face. To save face of the potential backlash they'll deal with should any information of the missing clan's tailor be brought to light to everyone who remain blissfully ignorant of the innerworkings of the clan.
I would normally deny this kind of offer, mostly because there is no benefit for me to join and work for them. However, times have changed, and I simply reconsidered denying Kamisato Ayato's offer.
... There is a few benefits to me joining. It may be minimal, but it is better than scrounging around in the dark.
And so, I agreed to the offer.
The arrangements set for me to move was quite swift. I'm aware that that he is a man of his word, so it was quite easy for us to prepare my living arrangements and move to the estate.
With the supplies I get from the clan, it's been easy to stay put and gather information to the person I'm targeting.
... That was, until that day came.
I remember it clearly: it was the ends of fall, where the maple leaves fell more and more around the estate's grounds. This usually signified the coming of winter, so I usually savor the season by having time off to admire the scenery.
And in one of my walks, I had travelled from outside of the estate to see if things have changed.
Which, to my luck, I've encountered my darling beloved.
But just like last time, they were not alone.
In the journey of my wandering, I have seen them speak to the sibling of the older heir, Kamisato Ayaka, as they sit on the table outside of the Komore Teahouse.
From how far I am to the entrance of the teahouse, it gives me enough space to watch them interact like friends. The way that the Himegimi raised her fan to cover her face, perhaps from her eyes crinkling in amusement from what they told her...
... It was intriguing. Very intriguing.
So much so that I've felt the claws of envy grip in my chest, clutching its metal nails and making punctures on my already bleeding heart.
What a nuisance. Must you hurt me like this, darling?
I can hardly remember what happened after that. After all, my focus had been set on the two speaking to each other like they were simply companions, unknowing of what fate may bring upon them.
...
"Oh? Kazuha! I didn't notice you came to the Teahouse as well!"
My attention was swiftly pulled away from the sight of my dearest gem, and it landed on the familiar sight of olive eyes. From the appearance alone, many wouldn't think that an immigrant of Mondstadt would be a fixer.
Not even I would be able to see it happen.
However, this man had the skills to prove of his worthโ after all, being Inazuma's 'fixer', he's often the go-to man to fix any and every problem that the Narukami Island and others may face.
Which makes him a glass canonโ one that is volatile and unpredictable, even under the guise of a friendly face.
That is what Thoma is.
But this "glass cannon" has his weakness, and I know how to use it to my advantage.
Letting a smile slip to my lips, I chuckled, raising my hand to cover my mouth. "Well, I've been foretold by others about Komore Teahouse and it's history. I've been meaning to visit it, but I'm so busy fixing kimonos and making them to have time to spare."
A white lie, but then again, there are many of those that have been foretold in the waking of this world.
What does adding one do at this point? I'm already damned by the heavens the day I've seen the 'truth' of this fate of mine.
Just one lie wouldn't hurt, right?
"Haha, I can't blame you," the taller blonde seem to answer my query with his own, albeit he did seem to look more like he was at ease. Still, I needed to be weary; he can change sides if he so much as sensed that something is wrong.
"After all, with what the missing tailor in the clan circulating around the others in the estate, I'm even surprised that you manage to fill up in their position for months!"
... Oh? So he's noticed my talents, hm?
I shook my head.
"Oh, please. I'm just a humble tailor, Thoma," I reasoned, letting out a heavy sigh. "I have thought of asking them for advice on how they do their work, but since they're missing, all I can do is substitute for their absence."
He gave me an apologetic smile and nodded.
"That is true... I guess I'm just a bit too ecstatic to finally have someone that can fill in their role seamlessly. Lord Kamisato Ayato would've been panicking if we didn't have a replacement soon for his anniversary with his spouse."
... Spouse, huh?
"Hm... Is that so?"
I frowned in thought as I ponder over wanting to... Ask him for a favor. Sure, this one wouldn't do well on one's conscious mind if they knew, but it was simply for their sake.
It was all for them. I knew that.
It wouldn't hurt anyone if I asked Thoma to do this for me. At least, while I still have the chance to do so.
I can only hope the cannon does not think of shooting it's shot to me if I slipped up.
"Speaking of, Thoma, may I ask you for a favor?"
After the first missing case of the tailor, there had been more that were reported. The victims were all varied in their appearance, age, and even from where they used to live, be it in Narukami Island or even outside of Inazuma itself.
It was difficult to tell how many there were exactly, especially with how the legend is interpreted. Some said it was 20, while others said it was 50. This legend has been passed mouth to mouth, so details were not a key figure for a few to remember well.
However, every iteration has the same detail. The victims all had the same similarity as the tailor that simply went "missing".
All of them, in some way, were associated with certain individualsโ one of them being his maple, where a few commented that they were the apple of the crimson man's eye.
From the legend and how it has been told, it is safe to assume that the motive was obvious from the first missing case.
It is akin of an open secret, if said secret was twisted to fit his ideals.
"Haven't you heard?"
"What? What is it?"
"The fixer, Thomaโฆ He went missing just few days ago."
"What!?"
โฆ
Ah, so he went missing like the others?
My ears had perked up at the news that we were told. Although Thoma is one many people never thought of being a 'target', the fact he went missing is... Odd.
"Perhaps he had done something," I heard one of the servants whisper amongst themselves, looking rather cautious. "After all, he's been very privy on a few things..."
"Yes, but he isn't the person I'd expect to vanish like thatโ"
"Shhโ! People are going to hear you, you know! Keep it down!"
Hearing their footsteps echo as they take their leave, I turned back to what I have been working on. The sight of the kimono graced my vision as I raised the needle.
I began to sew the tears on it, letting out a soft hum while I fixed the black fabric from it's horrible state.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
Slip, stitch, cutโ
"Sir Kaedehara? Someone is looking for you."
...!
I felt the needle prick my finger, but I didn't say anything. With a quiet hum, I raised my head to see someone speak to me, their face grim as they shifted on their feet.
Ah.
Despite the feeling of blood pour onto the fabric, I smiled and nodded, putting down the fabric of the kimono I was fixing.
"I'll be right there. Please tell them to wait for me."
"Really? Oh, thank Archons. I'll get going."
Watching them take their leave, my eyes flit over to my scissors.
Still as sharp as ever, I mused, pushing myself to stand up before fixing my attire. Mayhaps today won't need it to be sharpened.
For now, I had to see what the client wants from me. It would simply be a shame if I leave them alone for far, far too long.
Mayhaps they're here to inquire about the kimono I made. I made sure to add my personal touch to it.
...
As I walked to where my client sought to look for me, I see a familiar sight befell in the grounds of the Kamisato Estate.
The himegimi is currently speaking to my betrothed like they are close companions, and the magician (Lyney was his name, I recall), had been listening to their discussion at hand.
His eyes seem to lit up when he saw me, offering me a welcoming grin.
"You must be the tailor that my sister assigned, aren't you?" he asked when I was close enough to hear him, making me chuckle. Taking a seat across, I simply nodded, keeping my professional smile and demeanor in fear of offending him.
"Indeed, I am that tailor. My name is Kaedehara Kazuha, it is a pleasure to meet you."
"Haha, please, the pleasure is all mine!"
The magician shook my hand with mine, and the meeting went as smoothly as one may expect. Although, I couldn't help but let my eyes wander sometimes to where my lover is.
You were speaking to Ayaka like she's a friend of yours. I shan't stop you, darling, but perhaps you aren't aware of the pain you put me through.
Still, I couldn't afford to raise my voice, nor can I think of hurting you with my actions.
How unfortunate. Mayhaps I need to teach you a lesson myself, my angel.
If there was one thing that the legend failed to elaborate, it is the state of the missing people. However, there were... Creative liberties to those that began to see if the legend was true; or, pray tell, associated with any real life events.
To the eyes of others, going missing is a serious deal. It sparks a lot of ideas for what could've happened to them, and especially if they are alive or dead.
Albeit many shrugged off the prior cases, this one was serious. After all, the one that went 'missing' is the fixer of Narukami Islandโ Thoma, the immigrant in the nation of lightning.
It is, after all, what sparked the eventual downfall of the crimson-eyed tailor and his beloved. Many had thought this was the turning point, but those that did were found to be wrong.
This, after all, was simply the beginning of such downfall. But it wasn't to his lover, the missing residents, or even his companions.
It was to himself, when he used the blades to commit a sin undeserving of forgiveness.
The news that brought upon the missing Himegimi greeted the Kamisato estate that day.
I remember how people were in a disarray. They were much more shaken as they tried to get any sort of lead to where she is, and for some, they were already thinking of quitting.
The estate is already shaken from when Thoma went missing, but now that the young heiress has up and disappearedโ especially in winterโ it was in chaos.
While I sew the kimonos handed to me, there was an obi that laid on the pile by my right. It was a bit worn, but it can still be saved.
I needed to fix it, and give it my own personal touch. That way, it wouldn't look as though it had been abandoned by it's past owner.
Alas, the noise is getting to me. I could feel the silk resting on my bandaged hand slip every once in a while, if it weren't for how tight I've been holding the fabric.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
I needed to put my focus on what I'm doing. I needed to focus on the job.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
I mustn't let blood nor dirt stain my creations.
That is what my mother taught me.
Slip, stitch, cut, sew.
Slip, stitch, cut, seโ
"I apologize if the estate is in a disarray, detective," I hear a familiar voice speak amongst the hushed and panicked whispers. "The estate hasn't been the same ever since my retainer and my younger sibling had gone missing."
"Oh, it's alright! I'm sure this matter is too serious for you and the others to keep things organized."
"Haha... You can say that it is. Now, it's just right this way..."
... A detective is in the estate. How curious.
It wasn't right to snoop, but I was curious. Curious enough to have finished the kimono I was fixing before I stood to leave my quarters.
The others paid no heed as I followed after the two to Ayato's room, too focused to do what they were assigned to even bat an eye when I got close to where they were heading.
It was only when they were inside that I've stopped and simply bid my time, my focus set on what was happening by the shoji leading to his office. And it didn't took long till I hear things from the other side.
"Ah, so you think that someone is out for you?"
"Yes. Although I am normally adept in figuring out who it could be that's causing this to happen, I can't put heads or tails with how their presence eludes me."
"Man alive... And you said that it started when they went missing?"
"... Yes, detective."
"I see... Man alive, that sounds like it wasn't just a single, one-off case, then. I can help you, but this will take a while if there's no leads."
"I see. It's fine, detective. I'll pay you enough when you figure out where my retainer and sister are. I could hardly think that someone would take them without such consequence."
"Oh, no worries. With me around, no criminal will get out unscathedโ I'll make sure to bring them here when I figure out who did this."
...
I see.
Perhaps its about time I have to settle this with him.
There was a time where I have thought that things will change.
Where these cases will be laid forgotten, perhaps even unresolved with the lack of hints.
I spent weeks on end, keeping my tracks short and erasing any leads that can lead towards me again.
I spent so, so long trying so desperately to hide anything resembling my crimes.
But alas... He found me.
It was the time where I had to dispose of those bodies. Although I had no heart to bury them under nature, I was not above treating them as though they were simply people.
Even in death, I wanted to make them feel like they look peaceful. Although, perhaps simply sewing their wounds left by my scissors was not something I can treat.
In the middle of the night, I was carrying the Himegimi outside of the abandoned houses I tend to with her retainer, Thoma. I had thought of letting her rest someplace else. Her attire has been sullied, and I needed to keep the two somewhere where no one can find them.
Corpses rot over time, and if it was possible, letting them turn to nothing in the likes of Tsurumi Island will be enough for my weary heart to rest.
With how adept I am of keeping my tracks hidden, I had thought no one would be able to tail on me. But alas, due to the missing cases I've caused, perhaps I wasn't expecting this to happen.
"I knew you'd be here, Kaedehara Kazuha."
I simply paused upon hearing his voice, my head craning back to see that it was Ayato. Despite how composed he looks, I can tell that the nights he spent trying to search for his beloved sibling and retainer wore him down.
His once flawless appearance was nothing but sullied, his attire feeling like its simply hanging off of him, and the way he staggered while looking at me without a shred of restrain is new. Raw for such a heir.
"And that body..." he murmured, his eyes glaring daggers when he found out who it was.
Perhaps it's her dress that makes her recognizable. Or the hair.
"... I thought I've erased everything that can lead back to me," I spoke, sighing as I placed Ayaka's body down. "What a shame. I was quite close to erasing any traces and signs of their whereabouts. It would be nice to only have them be marked as 'missing', not dead."
"So... You admit to it, then?" the heir asked, walking over with stride. "That you have done this, Kaedehara?"
I simply said nothing.
And I knew that was enough of a confirmation for him.
"I knew something was wrong with you," I heard him speak, which caught my attention. Turning my body to finally face him, I watched as he scoffed and continued, "After all, a man as serene as you often had the worst to hide."
"Oh? How curious. Why would you say that?"
I saw his lips curl to a smile.
"Why, I had someone tail after you," he answered, his tone sounding so blunt and his demeanor became more like he's simply 'teaching' me something. "Someone that is associated with the clan. I'm sure you know who it is."
... How uncouth.
"I see... And you confronted me now? For what?"
"A duel."
He unsheathed his blade, and raised it towards my direction.
"I do not usually participate in these, but I'd like to honor your tradition. If I win, you turn yourself in to the Tenryou Commission. Confess all of your crimes, and we shall call it even."
"... Very well."
I raised my own blade, as a sign to his own.
"I needn't state my own terms if I lose, as I can't let you get out alive. Now, let us settle this matter... To each of our graves."
Usually, such details cannot be recreated from interpretation alone.
However, this one was the few exceptions to it's inevitable fate due to it's popularity.
The legend had focused on keeping the existence and ties of the Crimson-Eyed Tailor up for the listener's interpretation. This scene, however, was directly associated to a case that had been tackled many years ago.
The case went as such: each resident of a town goes missing each week. No one knows when it happens, as the day is often random. The victims of these disappearances are also random, so no one could derive from it being a 'pattern'.
No matter how young or old one is, their gender, their living conditions, and even their past... When they least expect it, they simply vanish. Erased.
The only times where the victim was found, several eye-witnesses had different iterations. Some said that the bodies were buried, while others found it floating by riverbanks and the side of the sea.
But the most commonโ and widely known, of courseโ was that each victim were made to a doll.
Their limbs were nothing if not sewn with thread, cuts of various degrees being patched with thread of similar color to 'mask' it's oddity. Their eyes were closed, but those that were unfortunate to open it were only greeted with it being turned to the back of their heads.
In some victims, several pieces of their possession were taken. However, most kept theirs on their person, and were seen to not be tampered with.
No one knows what drove someone to this degree. No one can even comprehend such a fact that it was entirely possible.
But to someone who's mind was twisted to the point of no return... It was.
This case had a name, but every resident of Inazuma refused to speak of it. Each time one does, they were told of the legend behind this case.
They were told of the Crimson-Eyed Tailor, and they were warned of one thing.
"Do not look at him or his betrothed. If you do, you're as good as dead."
...
It had been a year since our fight happened.
I remember the chaos that occurred back when I finally erased that man. Although it did left his body in an undesirable state, I still fixed and sew him up so that he didn't look as such.
Even in death, I wish to give the heir some form of dignity. That, in some way, I wish to give him his final respects.
After all, he had simply misunderstood my intentions. He didn't knew that I was out for one person from the very beginning.
The downfall of the Kamisato Clan was imminent at that point. I've seen many flee, and witnessed the tragedy befall on the Narukami Island. Many of the people I've met had simply ran off to seek refuge, the terror grasping and choking them like they were unable to think.
However, I remain clear. And I simply continued to do my work diligently.
I have been working on something... Special. And with one last snip of my bloodied scissors, it was now complete.
My final and life-long work, all laid across and now in my hands. The fabric I chose was rather difficult to sew. I should have known that human skin would be too hard, depending on where I retrieved it from.
Dying it in black, I wrapped the obi that had been sewn with the use of the Himegimi's locks, and retrieved the crest of the Kamisato Clan. Adorning it on my person, I viewed myself at the mirror to see my handiwork.
"Finally," I murmured, feeling an odd sensation in my chest as I wore the fruits of my labor. "It is now complete."
With the chaos guiding me and masking my presence, I fled to head by the mountain.
I knew where you were bound to go.
I knew of your crimes long before you knew me.
I didn't paid much attention if anyone saw me. I didn't care if blood simply poured from my attire and to the ground that I'm walking on. I could hardly give a damn if some realized of my crimes in that blasted estate.
I had my scissors with me, and I only wish to fulfill my last wish before I leave this cursed world.
You murdered my family, [Name].
You were the one who caused that fire all those years ago.
I remember those burns you gave me. I remember just how much of a coward you were, fleeing from the scene you caused yourself.
How could I lose everything? And how can you keep your family?
No. No, that mustn't happen. I must set this right.
As your 'lover', I'll make sure you understand what you did wrong.
The culprit of the legend was caught, at least by the end.
All of the townsfolk had banded over to help the detective figure out who had caused such a stir, and it was only because of one eye-witness that said everything. That simply told the truth of the man behind it all.
It was the Crimson-Eyed Tailor, the one who was gripped with envy, that caused such a massacre to occur.
When they found what became of the last victim, his 'lover', they became a doll of his own. After killing them, the legend proceeded to speak of how he had simply 'sown' their skin alongside his, making them his perfect beloved doll.
One of the iterations even mentioned that his unnamed lover was in a Shiromuku outfit, eyes gouged so they may "never look at another man". At least, from what the tale has concluded.
Because of the severity of his crime, the tailor was sent to be on his death row. When the detective tried to get information out of him, they found out that he has lost his mind.
He became a shell of the brilliant man they knew, laughing and speaking that he has finally fulfilled his desire.
Even when he was dragged onto the guillotine, that day was marked as the end of the massacre, and those who were alive spoke of the man's chilling laughter up until his head was cut off.
...
And that was the end of the "Crimson-Eyed Tailor" and his legend.
Or, more accurately, the history of the known "Dead Man's Heart" case, and how Kaedehara Kazuha murdered the one he "loved" for revenge.
@.throw-letter-away | do not republish or repost my works anywhere | 2023
Rawrs
synopsis: what kinds of horny stuff they have in their phones and which is the favorite?
pairing and characters: Aventurine, Blade, Boothill, Dr Ratio, Gallagher, Gepard, Jing Yuan, Loucha, Sampo, Sunday (separately) x fem!reader
tw: SMUT, established relationship (marriage/dating), consensual recording of lovemaking, nudes, oral, lingerie, fingering, masturbation, public sex, breast play, shibari/blindfold, sex machine, creampie
word count: 4.3k+ words
Undoubtedly this man has a whole separate folder for intimate stuff. Of course, he demands you send him something on a daily basis - doesnโt matter if itโs a quick snap of your choice of lingerie in the morning, or recordings of touching yourself - but never enough to cum, itโs his job. Naturally he loves having reminders of you being at his mercy - thus there are also videos of you both (with primarily established consent). All that to say - he has quite the collection, so itโs really hard to pick a favorite, the most desire-arising one.
Maybe itโs a category actually - self-made media created out of bet. Whoโll cum first? Can you keep going without tearing up from pleasure for longer than 10 minutes? Is he patient enough not to touch your sexy self, while you masturbate in front of him? Who is going to be louder this time? These kinds.
โI hope you are ready to lose,โ your lover smirks, making himself comfortable between your legs. Camera floats a little, as you chuckle behind it. With a momentary adjustment, the focus is on his face again and he winks, before turning to trail a little path of kisses across your thigh. The image jumps, when he sucks on the skin, and slightly trembles as you let out a sigh. Then itโs firm, as Aventurine wraps his arms around your thighs, his nose teasingly rubbing against your clit. Suddenly there is a lick, then your breath hitchesโฆ. And then he buries his mouth into your pussy. It doesnโt take much time for the image to begin shaking wildly, almost matching your debauched noises. There is squelching, there are award-winning male moans, muffled by your heat, soon there is a hand, your hand, reaching down and grabbing his hair. Phone strangely angles, hardly supported by just one hand, until it falls camera down onto the shits. After that, there are just delicious screams of yours, chanting the name of your lover and begging him to stop, while he doesnโt listen, taking his reward for yet another win.
Yeah, he proved you canโt keep the camera focused while he is eating you out in that one. Itโs truly a pity, that more than a half of what was going on, didnโt get recorded in image. Maybe next time you'll do better - oh... That's actually not a bad idea at allโฆ Looks like you are in for another bet.
His situation isโฆ quite peculiar. First of all, he has so little care for his own phone outside using it to get info for the mission, to the point ANYONE from the Stellaron Hunters can just take it and do whatever with it (Silver Wolf and Kafka practice it a lot). Even your relationship doesnโt change it much, he messages you rarely and quite shortly, preferring to save the conversation for personal interaction.ย
However recently, Kafka has been putting a plan into action - the first step of which was banning everyone from getting into his phone (herself excluded). Then sheโd start sending her colleague an occasional picture of a set of lingerie sheโs oh so sure would look wonderful on you. Blade never answers, but he doesnโt tell her off either, and by the snooping she knows that the pictures get bookmarked, the links for the shops she attaches are visited, and sums of money are being spent.
Oh, and by checking the chatโฆ She knows you get them delivered. Does she text you to shower you with compliments? She does. At first it was a little embarrassing and you asked Blade if he could, maybe, pay better attention to his phone??? But soon, when your lover started showing the telltale signs of jealousy... It became pretty hot (plus praise from THE Kafka? Ego-boosting).
Blade doesnโt voice it, but more than seeing you all pretty for him, he loves seeing you ruined for him, and doesnโt complain when you ask him to take a picture with your phone of whatever part of you, focusing on the marks, or the torn crotch of your panties, or something alikeโฆ There are times when he would text you with a simple โsend me pictures with torn stockingsโ or โyesterday. open nipples bra. nowโ , because he knows you have them, and you deliver, because you know he loves them.ย
Has his favorites:
Depicts your thighs, bitten and opened wide, while the black panties are pushed aside to let two thick, scar-covered fingers dive into your pussy.
Your body after one of the sessions - bra roughly pushed down under the mark-covered breasts, panties missing, one stocking still on the leg, but with multiple holes in it, and the other tying your wrists above your head.
A small video you insisted on recording of the man tugging onto your garter belt whenever he wanted your hips to push towards his thrust, threatening for the thin elastic material to snap.
Even though he doesnโt save them, he knows how to get an easy access to them, so for Blade it works quite fine (and Kafkaโs plan does too, making Blade look less intimacy-repulsed and spicing up your relationship).
A cyborg, whose only human part of the body is the head, and sex lifeโฆ How can this be possible?ย
Oh, trust me, it can. Sure, his bodily reaction differs, but he still is excited to get nudes from you, finally able to express through the text what he really thinks with that foul mouth of his. A voice recording of you dirty talking to him? Awesome. A video? You can bet his engine is overheating and vents are whirring.
But in all honesty, the ones he truly loves and returns to are the recordings of him doing stuff to you. Call him self-conscious, itโs not like he can bite back with a swear, but the reminder that he can bring you pleasure even now is sometimes necessary.
The lights are intimately dimmed, not enough to bring the room into utter darkness. Two bodies are lying almost intertwined with your back turned to the camera. The metal arm of your lover has sneaked under your side and around your waist, fingers digging into the plush glob of your ass, tugging on it, to further the spread which is created by your leg thrown over his hip. Your pussy is perfectly presented to the camera, puffy and slick, with two gray plated fingers massaging it. Digits slide up and down your labia, occasionally staying on the clit, to rub tight circles on it and elicit some sweet moans out of you, only to return to their previous ministrations, dipping the tips juuust a little bit into the quivering hole. Your back arches and body deliciously shivers from the contrast of his cool and your heat, and you softly whine, when he releases your ass cheek to give it a spank and then grab it again, unwilling to let the sight of your cunt escape his phoneโs camera. You whimper something, muffled by his chest, but he remembers by heart what you were begging for. โPlease, put your mouth on me.โ He will, in a minute, but right now he pushes both fingers to the second knuckle in, making you jolt in his hold, but not letting you go anywhere.
Itโs captivating, how his inhuman digits disappear and reappear with every thrust he makes; slick-covered they look shiny, as if you polished them, and the cyborg shudders, imagining your tongue running around them. Thatโs one dangerous video, he may just give in to his want to see you and abandon the mission he was assigned toโฆ
Unsurprisingly, Veritasโ phone doesnโt contain that much stuff in general. Maybe some downloaded articles, notes to put down later, if he doesnโt have a piece of paper at the moment, and very few pictures, mainly of his writings on the chalkboard. Donโt be discouraged though, of course he has pictures of you. Some selfies you took after โborrowingโ his phone and ones he doesnโt have a heart to delete (but he will scoff at you, should you decide to tease him), and some very well-thought images he took on his own accord - he needs reference for when he decides to let his mind rest from research and focus on sculpting.
And one might think that such a reserved and cold man will not entertain storing anything explicit on his phone. Well, he indeed does not have any pictures and videos saved - if he wants, he can either find what you sent him via your chat or just demand your assistance. Howeverโฆ There is something that strangely became his way of concentrating when doing his researchโฆ
โOh! Mh- *thrust* Veri- ohmygod! *thrust*โ
โWait- Aaah! I canโt! Iโm sore! MmmmMMM!โ โNo, you can and you will. Now hold still, I canโt eat you out if you keep thrashing around.โ โOh Aeons!โ
*Slick sounds of you going down on him, gurgling and choking on his girth, occasionally gasping to catch your breath, only to have his cock buried in your throat again*
โBaaabyโฆ I miss you so muchโฆ Can I come to your office? I promise to be goodโฆ Just need to cockwarm you - nothing else I swear. Let me keep you company pleeease. Imagine how nicely it'd be to have your cock buried in my pussy, while you are workingโฆ Need to help you with stress-relief, it's gonna feel so-so good.โ
โOh fuck, o-oh, love, I'm cumming, I'm cumming, IโmcumMIN-โ โNgh, s-soโฆtightโฆโ โAaaaaaah~!โ
โVeritas Ratio, if you come home in ten minutes, I will give you a nice massage and then ride you damn cock, till the only thing you can think about is not your work, but me. If you fail to do so thoughโฆ I wonder if my threat to use some toys instead will work. Just know that your wife is very mad. And horny.โ
It doesn't matter if the audio was taken while you were intimate or it was something you sent to him and he saved - he thoroughly enjoys everything your voice has to offer to him. And if instead of concentrated it accidentally makes him horny - he'll just play the next one, while undoing his pants.
Oh, this man is a menace. And a huge ass-lover. His gallery is full of pictures of your booty: clothed, just panty-clad or bare. There are shots with your body clearly being bent, ass up and back covered in his load. Videos of him fucking you from behind, with cock sliding in and out of your pussy? Obviously. Recordings of it jiggling as he spanks you? Wouldโve been strange if they werenโt there.
However, in that vast collection of his, there is a video thatโs most peculiar - one might say scandalous. It was one of those nights when he took over the bar for Siobhan and you came over at some point, all enticing and so sexy in that little dress of yoursโฆ He could not resist taking you right there once the establishment was closed. And it got on security camera...
Moans so loud, that they are reaching the recording device, are still of the delicious kind. Your back is arched over the bar counter, arms lifted and wrists tied by none other but Gallagherโs wine-red tie, and held by his own hand for good measure. The front of your dress is pushed down, revealing your pretty breasts, jiggling with every thrust of the manโs hips, and the hem of it has ridden up, baring your stomach and mark-covered thighs. Your lover is barely unclothed, pants and boxers pushed down just enough to free his cock and the tie, obviously, missing. The hand that is not holding your wrists, is grabbing onto your leg, under the knee, lifting it for a better angle, and showing off a lewd detail - your black lace panties hanging on your shin. You are looking positively debauched, and he is no better, groaning and cursing, with an occasional exceptionally rough trust that makes you scream and whine. There are teeth-gritted โslutโs and huskily chuckled โbad girlโs with your pleading โsirโs and โGalโs, all of that deliciously seasoned with the clapping of the wet skin colliding. But nothing beats the moment of you cumming, depicted by no less than three cameras from all of the hottest anglesโฆ
Of course this footage was โconfiscatedโ by him with some dumb excuse for Siobhan (he doubts she believed it, given the knowing look and shit-eating grin she gave him), with all traces destroyed except just one copy thoroughly hidden on his phone. He thinks you two should repeat that - this time, however, heโd love to bend you over the counter with your back facing himโฆ
Gepard would die if someone took his phone and got into his gallery. Poor man has to change the password weekly to throw Serval off his case (she was only teasing, but that made her brother paranoid). There is a reason for such behavior - while he is way too sweet and gentlemanly to suggest making sexy pics or, Supreme Guardian forgive, videos, he can't help but to be too whipped for you.ย
This man dutifully saves every single photo and video of yours - nudes included.
You don't send them very often - you don't want to kill your darling husband. But sometimes the yearning is unbearable, and there is a suffocating need to show Gepard what he is missing while away on duty (you always leave a warning message though, so he could check it while alone and undisturbed).
No matter how red and embarrassed he gets, the man timidly admits that he enjoys this kind of attention. He is not beyond the earthly pleasures - he too has a favorite theme, that recently became more present in what you send himโฆ
At first you looked so absolutely cute and domestic with his huge sweater on, the one you personally knitted for him - the beginning of the video didnโt look all that different from the photos you sent him just minutes before. But soon it becomes clear why you asked if he was alone, because once you position the phone and climb onto the bed, your full attire gets revealed. White stockings are replacing your usual home pants, and as your fingers grab the hem of the sweater and tug it up, the white panties from a matching set start peaking. The view is both pure and alluring, with the way your legs are spreading wide, and the sweater being pushed further up, baring your braless breasts. The hem gets secured between your teeth and both hands teasingly run down your sides, index fingers drawing circles around the tits, before squeezing them; as one remains right there, the other slowly slides down your stomach, disappearing under the hem of those flimsy panties. Imagination paints wild images - every next is hotter than the previous, and only your muffled moans of his name and rapidly rising chest are indicators of how good you feel with fingers pushing in and out of your pussy. And that damn sweaterโฆ You are not taking it off.
The Captain of the Silvermane Guards has one guilty pleasure - you, wearing his clothes. Domesticity, longing, finding comfort in something of his touches his heart and heightens his love and desire for you, almost making him consider taking a regular day off.
This man literally worships the ground his wife is walking on, so OF COURSE he wants to have as many pictures and videos of you as possible. It gets so boring and lonely when he is at work, after all. But donโt be fooled by his sweet and innocent smile, there are not only cute shots of you both or just you, he has sexy stuff too.
Man is obsessed with your chest. Itโs his favorite pillow (thus so many pictures of him snuggling his face right between your breasts), his best stress-relief (photos and short videos of his big veiny hands cupping and squeezing your girls, with an occasional swipe of the thumbs over the erect nipples), his favorite place to leave marks on (no one can see them under the clothes, but just one tug of his finger on your collar and he is met with a delicious sight. Plus the photos he asks to send occasionally).
Loves, loves, loves, purchasing lingerie for you and when you demonstrate your bra-clad tits. He immediately wants them in his face, but there is the phone screen keeping him away.
But oh does he love recordings of playing with them.
Your body is steadily bouncing on your husbandโs lap, creating a beautiful melody of skin slapping against skin. There is an occasional peak of his thick cock, covered in your juices, that immediately disappears again, undoubtedly swallowed by your pussy. One strong arm is wrapped around your waist, supporting you, while the other hand is palming at your left breast. The right one has fallen victim to his eager mouth, lips wrapped around the nipple, sucking on it tenderly, tongue toying with the overstimulated nub. His eyes are half-lidded when he looks up at you, moaning around your breast, when you tug on his luscious locks, trying to push him away, to give you a small rest. He is drawing back indeed, planting a soft kiss to the valley between the jiggling globes, and you sigh in relief, deceived by his affectionate action. Only for you back to arch and mouth hang in a loud moan, when Jing Yuan brings your other breast to his awaiting tongue, dropping both hands to your hips to aid you in speeding up your riding, sensing your nearing orgasm.
Maybe next time you should try recording him making you cum by playing with your chest onlyโฆ Ah, just the thought makes his cock swell.
As much as Loucha enjoys your company and more often than not allows you to accompany him in his journeys, there are times when he canโt take you with him. Which means he leaves for weeks, or sometimes a couple of months, going through the days without a single touch from you. Before getting into a relationship with you, he could survive without intimacy just fine, but now, since he knows the taste of affection and being spoiled by you, itโs getting hard.
Thatโs when recordings on his phone come in handy, especially when there is no opportunity of a video call to indulge. And there is one he most frequently returns toโฆ
Your chest is rising and falling, pretty breasts with perky nipples brought together by a wrap of a rope. Red and purple marks bloom on your skin akin flowers, some fresh, some from days before. Sweat shines on your hot skin, indicating just for how long the blonde has been torturing you with pleasure and denial. There is a small shake of the video, as your lover is establishing his phone, having just started the recording, and softly making you aware of how good you look - you wouldnโt know with that blindfold covering your eyes. Once the angle is perfect - capturing your arms, tied above the head, the arch of your back and thighs pushed together for stimulation, the man is joining you on the bed. It is cock-hardening, how you lift your head to find his lips, when you sense him leaning down, needily allowing him to indulge in a kiss before the game of orgasm denial continues. His hand meanwhile is creeping down your body, starting with caressing your cheek, fingers sliding down your neck, over the swell of your breast, thumb pushing against the nipple, eliciting a moan out of you right into his mouth, and then palm splaying on your stomach, traveling even lower, before it disappears between your thighs.
Loucha is a man of foreplay. There is nothing more satisfying to him, than indulging into your body before sinking his cock into your warmth. He loves making you squirm, completely at his mercy, drawing you right to the edge, and then denying you the sweet release, just to make you yearn, just to stretch the process out.
Sampo is nasty and that is not a secret. I am sure, if you were up for it, heโd suggest filming porn just for the giggles (and extra cash, come on, you both are fucking hot). There are teasing nudes and intimate videos, and itโs not a rare occasion of either of you texting the other with some found porn with a caption โletโs try it?โ and you do, frequently recording the process to compare later, and claiming that your performance is better.
However, sometimes it tends to not go according to the script (not like you usually have one). Sampo is chaotic and itโs not hard to lose focus with a lover like him, and these exact moments are Koskiโs favorite. Despite being a Masked Fool, during these times he himself looks so sincere, itโs as unnerving, as it is exciting. Rewatching such videos and seeing how you mirror the look in his eyes, giggle with him, even crack a joke, all without ruining the mood - makes him believe heโs found his soulmate (and if you did film porn with him, heโd never share this level of intimacy with your viewers, it solely belongs to you two).
You are giggling, shaking your head with a wide smile, all the while lying on your stomach between his toned mark-covered thighs and leisurely fisting his hard, leaking cock with an angrily red tip.ย
โSampo, please, be a little serious, we are trying to be sexy here.โ
โWe are sexy! Whatโs not hot in shaping my and your pubic hairs into the lips?? They could kiss, when we fuck!โ
โYou are unbelievable,โ you snort, trying to save the last bits of your composure, and leaning forward to mouth at his tight balls. This makes your lover pornographically (how ironic) moan, throwing his head back.
โMmm, yes, right there~ Ooohโฆ If am soooo unbelievable, it must mean I am dreamy? How about I bring you to a Penacony, to a Dreamscape? I bet in your dream Iโd be as good in bed as I am in reality.โ
Your resolve snaps and you burst out laughing, letting go of his sack and pressing your face to his thigh, shaking, dropping the hand from around his cock. Sampo whines.
โCome ooooon, I was so close!โ
โShu-ah-ha-t-ah-uh-p,โ you manage through your laughter. The man pouts, but the gaze of mint green is summer-warm as he is looking down at your trembling form. Your voice is pretty, your cackles are pretty, and oh damn he is laughing too.
And these are just the first few minutes of the last video, the thing has a duration of half an hour, so, obviously, you didnโt stop there. Thatโs what Sampo Koski loves - no matter how cringe you become, itโs never a reason to stop the whole process. If anything itโs something to spark an even longer and intimacy-filled one.
Keeping personal stuff on his phone is quite dangerous, given Sundayโs position. Thatโs why he owns two phones - his work one, and one to mainly contact you, his sister, and a small circle of the most trusted people. He is extremely good at handling the owning of two separate devices, never mistaking one for another, that people are often convinced he has only one.
But itโs his personal cellphone that interests us. Oh, does he have a whole collection of photos and videos of you, one folder in particular hidden just for good measure. Sunday is a collected and regal man, yet it doesnโt mean he has a hard time enjoying your teasing. Quite contrary, sometimes he welcomes it, loving the photos you send him from an outing, shopping for clothes, or better yet, lingerie, sending him multiple shots of different sets and asking him which he loves most, and which heโd like to see on you tonight.ย
There are videos too, especially when heโs been extremely busy, and you are oh so needy, sending him short recordings of touching yourself, sighing out his name, begging him to come and help you. However, there is one he particularly likesโฆ
Big silicone cock is being pushed in and out by the machine he purchased for you to quell your need when your husband canโt be there for you. You are on your stomach, with hips slightly raised and pushed backwards, chasing the toy, and he can see the perfect outline of your pussy, outer lips swollen and puffy, covered in a sticky substance, opening and constricting in attempts to accommodate the girth. Your moans are sweet, so-so sweet, hitting a high pitch, when the dildo falls out and a thick glob of cum substitute escapes your pussy. And then another, and another, messing your thighs even more, ruining the towel underneath you. Yet you donโt stop, reaching behind, and pushing the tip back into your tight warmth, making the toy pick its pace again. Itโs squelching, itโs so dirty, but itโs so hard to look away. You give yourself creampie, after creampie, sometimes stopping to collect the substance and push it inside with your digits, fingering, moaning and whining for your husband, wishing itโs his cum sploshing between your walls, breeding you.
Yes, itโs his favorite, almost 4-minute video. Ever the neat freak, he canโt deny you look heavenly when ruined, on an equally ruined bed, begging for his attention and semen. You have to forget about the machine for some time, however, because since then Sunday has been truly devoted to breeding you.
Oh, but as much I hate those feminism-hating, men submitting trad-wives on social media, you just know a yandere would eat it the fuck up.
Like those misogynistic, tate fuckers? The gymbros? The so-called alpha males? They're lovestruck by a pretty little housewife who loves God and prances around the house in modest, yet cute clothes. They think she's adorable, makes them want to just protect her.
A reader like that, would give them a bad case of cuteness aggression. Probably for the best, honestly.
It's funny. Almost hilarious. Because a yandere like that would be so easy to manipulate. For a while, let's just entertain the idea of a trad-wife reader being two-faced. On the surface level, she's a pure, innocent little thing who just wants to stay home vacuuming and tidying up the house for her husband. But deep down.. she's really just playing it safe, you know?
I mean, she doesn't really want this life, per say. Her husband thinks it's in his nature to be dominant and doesn't believe in the government or vaccinating. To some degrees, it's bearable, but then he starts talking about how raw milk is the way to go and how his future children would surely be home-schooled.
And frankly, well, you start to think he's quite idiotic.
It was an arranged marriage. And while you were raised to be a traditional, submissive homemaker, you start to realise that this isn't what you wanted. Not what you'll ever want.
So from there? It's all manipulation and playing coy.
Just smile and bake him sweet pies. Live in to the chauvinistic fantasy he has fragmented and feed into his ego.
Now would you get spoiled? Realistically, no. But if it's a yandere? Hell, yes.
Only the most gorgeous diamonds for you, dear wife. And pretty ass dresses. If that isn't how usually dress... better change your style.
Coo into his ear as he comes home from a long day of work; rub his shoulders and press soft kisses to his jaw; call him your strong, dependable husband who you'd love forever.
1, 2, 3.. anddd, he's putty in your hands.
Tell him you'll take care of his children as he lavishes you in luxury. That new house by the seaside you wanted? Done. He'd prefer living in the countryside instead, but oh well. You're the future mother of his kids, of course you deserve the best.
And of course, discreetly continue to take your birth control pills.
This got me feeling smth
If your still taking requests, what about a story where the boys have a mate (who came to them willingly, not by force), but she's really naive and not too bright. So they take advantage of her innocence by having her fulfill their fantasies while teaching her how fun sex can be.
"Yeah baby, sucking dick is great for sore throats. Didn't you know that?" that kind of stuff. Hope thats cool!
[A/n] To the anon who requested this, I apologize profusely for the delay! I received this prompt about a month ago and completely adored it, but I didnโt know how to execute it at the time. Iโve been working on it off and on for a while, finally getting my mojo going after brainstorming with a few mutuals. Thank you, @misslavenderlady and @that-girl-who-writes-sometimes, for the help! Anon, slide into my Ask Box and let me know if you liked it. I kind of went rogue with it toward the end. Hope you enjoy! ๐
[Poly!Lost Boys x Gullible!Reader]
[Modern!AU - Not set in 1987, but 35 years later.]
[Fic Warnings] 18+ MDI (SMUT) โ Manipulation/Coercion, Dubious Consent, Dry Humping, Predator/Prey Dynamics, Violence/Aggression, Fellatio, Rough Sex, and Blood Drinking.
[Summary] Youโre a naive little bird, and you make the mistake of allowing the boys to know how infatuated you are, something youโll grow to regret.
All Rights Reserved. Please Do Not Copy, Plagiarize, or Reproduce.
The best prey was the kind that came willingly, foolishly wandering into their clutches with doe eyes. The boys loved the chase, the hunt, but they adored when prey foolishly put their trust in a predator.ย
Thatโs where you came in. You were their next victim, pure and naive.
You were smitten by their manipulative charm and their irresistible good looks. They noticed you watching them coyly for weeks, googly-eyed and wanton. You worked at the local bookstore on the boardwalk, and the register had the perfect view of where they parked their bikes by the pier.ย
You practically drooled when you laid eyes on them, the thundering quartet of their motorcycle engines blazing down the road, causing your innocent little loins to stir with life, slickening under your skirt. Even with that cacophony, they could hear your heart pound in your chest with unbridled lust.ย
They couldnโt wait to have you moaning and writhing beneath them in sinful corruption and ecstasy. They had been patient for a while, teasing you by loitering in your presence until they were ready to lure you away, never to be seen again.ย
The four hungrily slithered into your job like snakes with you in their crosshairs, intent on getting your legs open โ and your blood into their bellies.ย
You blushed and fidgeted when they approached the counter, your eyes cast down in delicious submission as they circled you with predatory precision. They hadnโt even worked their mojo, and you were already theirs.ย
It didnโt take much for them to beguile you. They whispered a few sweet nothings, calling you โbeautiful,โ โdoll,โ and โbabe,โ and you began sweating and stuttering behind the counter.
They led you to their bikes, helping you onto the back of Davidโs to whisk you away to their lair.ย
Once there, getting you undressed was easy. You were such a silly little human! So innocent, trusting, and gullible!
All it took was some deviously slick words from Paul, and you dropped your skirt and removed your blouse in a panic, thinking a spider had crawled on you.ย
โItโs okay, babe,โ Paul cooed in mock concern as he soothed you, stifling a sadistic chuckle. โItโs gone,โ he reassured as you sniffled in his embrace, wearing only your bra and panties.
He stroked your lower back, running his nimble fingers over your bottom before giving it a hefty slap. โSit with David while I make you a drink,โ Paul urged, leading you to his brotherโs chair. โIโll make you a White Russian. Itโs delicious, trust me.โ
You didnโt drink alcohol, and you timidly tried to protest as it fell on deaf ears, Paul grabbing Marko and dragging him to the tunnels, disappearing into the darkness with a bottle of Vodka, a bottle of Kahlรบa, and a glass.
David leaned forward, grabbing your hand as he patted his knee. You reluctantly sat on the toned joint as you sniffled and continued wiping tears from your eyes.ย
โItโs okay, dollface,โ David soothed as he grabbed a tissue and began to help dry your tear-streaked face.ย
โThank you,โ you whispered meekly. โSpiders are icky.โ
โYes, but donโt worry. Weโll protect you.โ David purred as he lifted you by your waist, positioning you higher so you fully sat on his lap. โComfy?โ He asked slyly.
โA little,โ you timidly responded as you looked at him with doe-eyes.ย
โIf you arenโt, feel free to get comfortable,โ he suggested with a smirk as he eagerly leaned back in anticipation.ย
You wiggled around until you found a soft spot on his lap that suited your comfort, but you quickly had to readjust because you felt a large bulge form beneath your bottom, prodding you between your fleshy cheeks.ย
โSomethingโs poking me,โ you muttered as you squirmed, causing David to groan with pleasure through half-lidded glacier eyes.ย
โAre you okay?โ You asked in concern as you watched the platinum blond voraciously eye you.ย
โHeโs just fine, beautiful,โ Dwayne silkily replied as he stole you from David, grabbing your wrist and pulling you off his lap, causing the platinum blond to hiss with displeasure before he freed himself from his jeans, stroking his length in frustration.ย
Dwayne pulled you towards him, lifting you by your waist to seat you just as David had. โThis seat is the best one in the house,โ he purred as you squirmed around to get settled again. But you nearly leaped two feet into the air when you felt the same uncomfortable bulge form beneath your rear โ except larger and thicker.
โIโm being poked again,โ you whined as you tried to remove yourself from Dwayneโs lap. The brunette wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you firmly into place as you unintentionally massaged his erection.ย
Dwayne moaned, sliding his hands from your waist to your hips as you gyrated against him. You became flushed, your ditzy squirming causing stimulation for you as well. You both became slack-jawed as heat blossomed below the belt, your little loins moist and pulsing as Dwayneโs massive dick caressed your nub through his jeans and your panties.ย
Unknown to the three of you, you werenโt the only ones in the midst of sweet stimulation. While David caressed himself and you cooed in Dwayneโs lap, Paul and Marko titillated each other in the tunnels, mutually masturbating until they were on the cusp of orgasm. They both eagerly came in your cup, spilling milky seed into a mixture of Vodka and Kahlรบa, birthing your delectable White Russian.ย
They tucked themselves into their pants, devilishly smiling, as they bounded back to the Main Cave to deliver your drink.ย
The hurricane duo arrived to see you quivering in Dwayneโs lap, the brunette smirking as you twitched from orgasm, your dry humping having thrown you over the edge.ย
You collapsed against his chest, nuzzling him as you panted from cumming. Dwayne had you spent, your innocent little body not used to such pleasures. But that was only an appetizer for their brother, Marko, Paul, and David could see that Dwayne was still ravenously hungry. They all were, but they had to tenderize you a little more before they dined on your virtue.ย
โHereโs your drink, beautiful,โ Marko cooed with a shit-eating grin as he plopped down on the couch, presenting it to you.
You stared at the concoction with sleepy eyes. โI donโt drink,โ you informed the quartet drowsily, still dazed from your first orgasm.ย
โThereโs a first time for everything,โ Dwayne muttered, jumping in to aid his brothers in tag-teaming you, something they effortlessly did when manipulating prey.ย
They always worked as a unit in their malicious endeavors.ย
You whined as Marko pushed the drink towards your face, Dwayne forcing you to sit up so you could imbibe. You took the warm glass in your hands, raising it to your lips as you reluctantly took a sip, pulling back as you made a face that showed your surprise.
It wasnโt bad; it was delicious with a saccharine zest, but it was strong, Marko going heavy on the Vodka, the alcohol burning your chaste throat.ย
โIt burns a little,โ you complained as you coughed slightly, rubbing your throat as you drank. You finished the glass after their sinister urging, the four watching you suck down vampire seed disguised as heavy cream.
โMy throat hurts,โ you complained as your bottom lip jutted out in a pout.
โWe have just the cure for that, babe,โ Paul wolfishly replied as he unzipped his pants, releasing his rock-hard dick from his tattered white jeans.ย
You stared wide-eyed from Dwayneโs lap as your eyes fell on the long, thick, pale appendage โ cherry red at the tip and swollen as it wept.ย
โWhat are you doing?โ You asked in surprise as Paul plopped down on the chair across from the sofa, his legs wide.
โIโm trying to help you with your sore throat,โ Paul purred while his brothers chuckled. โSucking dick is great for sore throats.โย
โReally?โ You asked in disbelief as your eyes fell on the appendage between his legs.ย
โYeah, baby, didnโt you know that?โ He cooed as he stroked himself, beckoning you with a crooked finger.ย
Dwayne coaxed you from his lap, whispering in your ear that he and David would โget you another drink,โ while Paul helped you with your sore throat. The brunette and the platinum blond disappeared into the tunnels with your glass, the liquor, and their erections while you knelt before a grinning Paul.
โI-I I-Iโve never, you know?โ You stuttered as you looked up at the wild-haired blond. โCan you teach me?โ You asked.
โOf course, babe,โ Paul replied with a wicked smile. โMarko and I are the BEST teachers. Right, Bud?โ
โRight, Paulie,โ Marko agreed with a smirk as he nibbled his thumb, his eyes twinkling with mischief. โJust open your mouth, babe; weโll guide you.โ
You bashfully parted your lips, flicking your pink tongue out to chase the milky dribbles that leaked from the blond before wrapping your lips around him. Paul sighed, throwing his head back as he became enveloped in the silky warmth of your mouth.ย
โWhat do I do now?โ You mumbled around his dick. It sounded anything but coherent, the sounds garbled and unintelligible. But with the boysโ pristine hearing and mind-reading capabilities, they knew exactly what you were saying.ย
โSuck it, beautiful,โ Marko urged as he toyed with strands of your hair. โPretend like itโs a popsicle โ a nice juicy popsicle. Get it all wet.โย
You did as you were told, bobbing your head up and down, using your tongue and saliva to slicken Paulโs length and sucking on him like he was your favorite ice cream treat.
โGrab it, babe,โ Paul ordered through heaving breaths. โMassage it.โ
You followed instructions, wrapping your dainty little hand around him and pumping, causing the wild-haired blond to writhe in his seat. You needed coaching, but you were a natural, your hot little virtuous mouth sending him to a frenzy.ย
He locked eyes with Marko for a moment, he and the curly-haired blond exchanging devious thoughts as they plotted on you. Before you could register what was going on, Marko had pushed your head down, and Paul had grabbed your hair, his hips jackhammering into your mouth as he fucked your throat.ย
You struggled against his groin, slapping his thighs and desperately digging your nails into his flesh in an attempt to free yourself.ย
โBreathe through your nose, gorgeous,โ Marko cooed as you moved to scratch at his hand, trying to untangle him from your locks.ย
Neither blond budged, holding you in place as Paul fucked you, wet slapping and garbled glucking noises filling the room.ย
Your eyes watered, and tears began to flow down your cheeks, pooling under your chin. You managed to get some air as you sniffled, Paul moaning and grunting as he bucked into your face with his eyes closed.ย
The act felt like it went on for ages, only ending when the wild-haired blond came down your throat, warmth blossoming in your chest as you were forced to swallow his hot seed.ย
He released you, laying back with a content smile as you whined at his feet.
Dwayne and David returned with your drink to see you sitting on the floor weeping into your hands, snotty and tear-stained, while Marko giggled like a madman and Paul smoked a joint.ย
The two exchanged glances with raised eyebrows before investigating their brothersโ shenanigans.ย
โWhatโs wrong, little one?โ Dwyane asked with his melodic baritone.ย
โPaul said sucking his,โ you hesitated, โd-dick would cure my sore throat, but it only made it worse.โ You sobbed.ย
โPoor baby,โ Dwayne purred as he knelt next to you, presenting you with your second 'White Russian,' a slightly larger serving this time. โDrink this; it will make you feel better.โ
Naively, you took the glass, drinking the sinful concoction without hesitation. You grimaced. It tasted good, but it was apparent David and Dwayne had made this one stronger.ย
Your stomach was empty besides the alcohol and their seed, Paulโs being the only seed you were aware of, and you were worried about becoming too tipsy. Your body was growing warm, your belly absorbing the liquor and sending it straight to your bloodstream, along with the proteins they donated.ย
You didnโt have a high tolerance, so shortly after drinking your second glass, your body became languid and flushed as your pussy pulsed in need.ย
David and Dwayne smirked. The first step was complete. You consumed their seed; now, you had to sacrifice your body. Dwayne passed the glass to David before gathering you into his arms, lifting you, and carrying you toward the tunnels. His brothers followed, shedding their clothing as they journeyed, leaving them nude once you arrived at your destination.
Dwayne laid you down on the bed, watching you with piercing chocolate eyes as you began to sweat and squirm โ the alcohol and their euphoria of their seed taking hold.ย
โSheโs ready, boys,โ David purred with a smirk as he crawled on top of you, looking down at you with his icy orbs. He lowered his lips to yours, kissing you deeply as you sighed in contentment, your eyes fluttering closed.ย
With taloned fingers, David swiped at your bra and panties, shredding them to ribbons, exposing you to himself and his brothers. The four inhaled as your scent wafted through the air, the smell much more robust than it was moments ago.ย
โThis is going to hurt a little, dollface,โ David warned as he mounted you, putting your legs on his shoulders as he lined himself up with your entrance.ย
You nodded timidly, closing your eyes when you felt his manhood prod at your sopping wet opening. Your face twisted in discomfort, and your breath hitched as David forced himself inside, stretching you out painfully.ย
The platinum blond surprisingly peppered your face with kisses, soothing you in hushed tones as you began to tear up.ย
But that was the extent of his tenderness.ย
David pulverized you, not bothering to take it slow because it was your first time. He took full advantage of your body, pounding, scratching, and biting you as he moaned in bliss.ย
You were in pain โ at first, but after a while, the platinum blond began to tease all of your tender spots, causing you to warble sinfully beneath him as his brothers paced around the bed like lions, awaiting their turn to devour your body.ย
David didnโt care that his brothers were waiting; he took his time with you, savoring your velvety heat as you rippled and twitched around him, whining his name as you drooled.ย
You came hard, splashing Davidโs stomach with your juices as you squirted. You collapsed into the pillows, spent from pleasure, but that didnโt spare you from the appetites of the others.ย
When David unmounted from you after his release, another boy immediately took his place, manhandling you into the position they desired before they slid inside you. You panted, begging each of them for a break, but they granted you no mercy, rutting into you from behind, from the side, or however they wished until they fell over the edge, taking you with them.ย
They fucked you for hours, the room becoming thick with the smell of sex. You could barely move when they were done with you. You were overstimulated and exhausted, laying in the middle of the bed, mouth agape in a dreamy daze.ย
The boys crawled into bed with you, cuddling you as you settled down to nap in their embrace. You snuggled against David, your head on his chest as you began to drift off to dreamland โ but he and the boys had other plans.ย ย
โDo you believe in vampires?โ David asked as he stroked your hair.ย
โNo,โ you responded as the boys chuckled around you, but you were too tired to pick up on the danger โ not that you could anyway. Your instincts were poor.ย
โTheyโre just characters in books and movies. They aren't' real.โ
David kissed you on your forehead, smirking against your brow. โSo naive, you are, little one,โ he whispered in amusement. โThat's why weโre going to keep you.โย
You didnโt know what he meant. You were nearly gone, the Sandman having beckoned you long ago. You were snoring lightly when you squealed in agony, having felt a stabbing pain in your breast.ย
You opened your eyes, screaming in fear, when you saw the boys with the faces of demons โ blazing red eyes with golden irises, protruding brows, chiseled cheekbones, and fangs.ย
They were vampires.
You wailed as they tore into your body โ Marko on your breast, Paul between your legs, Dwayne on your wrist, and David on your throat.ย
They drained you while you wept, your heart fluttering and slowing as they consumed your life.ย
But they didnโt drain you dry, they pulled back as you began to fade in and out of consciousness, David sending Marko to retrieve the bottle.
You were propped up in Davidโs arms and fed their blood as you gasped and wheezed for air, the boys forcing you to fill your stomach before you slipped away from this life.
โShhh โ donโt cry,โ Marko purred as he propped himself against the headboard, wiping your tears as David rocked you in his arms. โItโs okay. We have one more step in the ritual, and then you can rest.โ
โRitual?โ You muttered weakly, frightened and confused by everything that was going on.ย ย
โThe mating ritual, little one,โ Dwayne purred as he stroked your cheek. โWe completed four steps; we have one more to go. So, donโt fight it," he purred. "Let death come.โ
โNo,โ you mumbled as you felt yourself drifting away, unable to fight anymore because your number was up. You closed your eyes, dropping dead in Davidโs arms as your lungs released your last breath.ย
The ritual was complete. You consumed their seed, sacrificed your body, gave your blood, consumed theirs, and gave your life.ย
You were now theirs โ their mate, their wife, bound to them for eternity.ย
All because of your gullibility and your silly human infatuation.ย
FIN.
Taglist:
@6lostgirl6 @the-faceless-bride @wowisksksj @britany1997 @pixielostboy
Yandere cowboy introduction
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Yandere clinger introduction
Yandere victim introduction
Part 1 Part 2
Yandere chef
Yandere coach introduction
Part 1
Yandere damsel introduction
Part 1 Part 2
Yandere barista introduction
Yandere soldier introduction
Yandere bookworm introduction
Yandere tutor introduction
Yandere gamer introduction
Yandere creep introduction
Yandere ghost introduction
Yandere siren introduction
synopsis: kunikuzushi canโt take his eyes off of your hands while you play guitar (i.e. he wants you so bad i want him so bad)
cws: handjob, blowjob, cumshot, kinda bratty!kunikuzushi, heโs also a switch kinda, gn!reader
word count: 2300+
a/n: inspired by a c.ai bot!! i was supposed to be working on my drafts while i was shadowbanned but i didnโt LMFAO
in the comfort of his garage, the indigo-haired boy wasnโt the haughty scaramouche of the small cityโs band. in the comfort of his garage, the indigo-haired boy was just kunikazushiโthe brash yet soft-spoken boy whom youโve known since middle school. and as he sat in the comfort of his garage, drumming away at the drum set in front of him, his eyes were glued on you as you stood there, strumming away at your electric guitar, too lost in the music to feel his gaze burning into you.
the sounds of your practice was muffled to any outside ears by the numerous padding stretching over all four walls of the garageโa request from his mother when the band had first started up. practice was a lot quieter today, the lack of the other five members of the band was glaringly obvious and kunikuzushi was conflicted. the lack of ventiโs boisterous laughter and heizouโs teasing antics was a nice change in pace, however with his attention not being diverted amongst his other band mates, his full attention was on you.
heโd spent years wondering about your hands, wondering about how smooth they look despite the amount of times youโve plucked your guitar until youโve bled on stage. his thoughts distracted him one too many times, playing the wrong drum at the wrong moment and completely messing up the beat for the fifth time this session. he lets out a disgruntled sigh, shaking the thoughts from his head while he reaches up to stop the cymbalsโ mocking rings. he looked over at you with an apologetic look, his eyes wandering over your figure as you slid your guitar strap off of yourself.
โsorry, sorry.. iโm a little distracted today,โ he muttered while he watched you put down your guitar and walk over to him. he could barely look you in the eye, fiddling with the hem of his shirt and pulling it down to cover up the tent growing in his shorts. that look you gave him sent a shiver down his spine. you were always like thisโso confident and teasing and itโs no wonder why you were the second most popular member of the band, following closely after your smooth talking, blonde band mate.
โoh? sorry for what, kuni?โ your voice held a teasing lilt as you spoke his name causing him to grumble once again. you let out an amused hum, leaning against the wall beside him and crossing your arms over yourself. his eyes flickered to your hands once again while they resting on your arms before darting back up to your face. you still wore that knowing smirk that never ceases to make his blood boil and rush to his cock, โsorry for checking out my fingers?โ
kunikuzushi let out an exasperated grumble, โyou noticed? damn it..โ he slid a hand down his face with a groan, โsorry. shit- iโm so sorry.โ he felt like a loser and a complete pervert for getting so worked up over something as simple as your fingers.
he shut his eyes and ran a hand through his hair, listening as a soft snicker left your lips. of course you knewโwhat did he expect? nothing seemed to escape your eyes, especially not when it comes to him. what he didnโt expect however was your fingers gently grazing over his jaw, tracing down his jawline before firmly taking his chin between your thumb and index and guiding him to face you.
his eyes shot open at your sudden advances, pupils blown wide when he looks up to see you towering over him. you wore that same devilish grin but he swore that with the way the ceiling light was blocked by your figure, you looked like youโd just descended from heaven and his thoughts were only made stronger when you leaned closer and brushed your thumb over his bottom lip. heโs thought about this exact moment enough to know where this would lead but despite that, his breath hitched the moment you began to lean in some more.
your lips touched his for a brief moment and he swore he nearly came in his shorts, letting out a soft whine when you pulled away. his face burned a bright red as he looked up at you through half-lidded eyes, his bottom lip trembling slightly. he fought the urge to chase after your lips, taking a moment to admire your features as they sat right in front of him. the lips that just kissed him were pulled up into a smirk, the eyes that always seemed to scan over him every second of every day were looking directly into his own, and the hands heโs spent everyday for the past few years thinking of were slowly inching up his leg.
his eyes were darting all over the place, shifting from your eyes to your lips to your hands in a pattern that help playing over and over again with each passing second of you sinking down to your knees. he was already hard the moment you walked into his garage but now heโs convinced his cock is gonna rip through his shorts. god, heโs so painfully erect and your teasing is driving him insane. he swears his balls are gonna burst as your fingers lightly graze up his knee and towards his throbbing erection at a pace so excruciatingly slow. youโre such a fucking tease and heโd be scowling at you right now if it werenโt for the moan heโs holding back.
his muscles tense as your fingers get higher and higher on his thigh and his jaw clenches when you start to palm him through his shorts, causing him to throb so deliciously under the fabric. his breath is slow and shallow as you continue to tease him, hitching slightly when your fingers hook under the waistband of his shorts only to snap the elastic against his hips with a smirk. heโs about to scowl at you, only to be stopped when his face contorts into a silent moan at the feeling of your fingers firmly wrapping around him through the cloth. his hips have a mind of their own as they buck upwards into your grasp, a soft groan leaving his lips, โstop fucking teasing.โ
he scowls at you, his indigo eyes glaring at your widening smirk in irritation and lust. your fingers make their way into his waistband again and heโs half-expecting to feel the elastic snapping against his hips once more, only to be pleasantly surprised when you start tugging them down at an excruciatingly slow pace. your knuckles inch down his hips and down his thighs, grazing over his knees and over his calves until the fabric of his shorts are pooled at his ankles, leaving him in his shirt and boxers. your hands glide against his skin as they travel back up his legs, one hand resting right beside his throbbing cock while the other rubs his thigh ever so slightly.
he can feel his face burn a bright red, his eyes locked onto yours as you continue to tease him. your hand slowly inches towards his boxers until it finally grasps at him through the fabric, his body shivers at the touch and his cock throbs beneath the fabric. he bucks his hips up into your hand, a scowl on his face despite the deep blush. โstop fucking teasing,โ he huffs, only for you to snicker and hook your fingers under the waistband of his boxers and snap them against his hips once again.
โyouโre very demanding, kuni,โ you hum, smirk still evident on your lips as you begin to pull down his boxers. he lets out a sigh of relief once his cock is free and no longer straining against the fabric, slapping up against his stomach and staining the fabric of his shirt with a drop of his precum. his about to reply with a witty comment only for his words to disappear off his tongue the moment your hand wraps around the base of his cock, a groan replacing them when your hand slowly pumps up and down his shaft while your thumb rubs at the tip. he watches as your hand moves up and down, the tips of your skilled fingers that usually have no problem reaching even the hardest notes barely touching around his girth and his pretty, pink tip throbs and leaks at the sight.
he feels like heโs losing his mind, his knuckles white from how hard heโs digging his nails into the bottom of his chair. he never thought heโd be in this situation, never thought heโd have to be holding back his own orgasm either. heโs so close to cumming already, so close to painting your face white right here and now and oh god how he wants to.. heโd love nothing more than to give in and have his cum splatter all over that pretty little face and hand of yours, maybe even watch you lick some of it off your lips but heโs not sure when thisโll happen again, if thisโll happen again so instead, he holds back.
he thinks you look perfect like thisโyour face so close to his throbbing cock, kneeling in front of him with one hand wrapped around his girth while the other slowly creeps up his thigh. he lets out a lustful groan when your other hand cups his balls, his full sack twitching and throbbing against your fingers. he canโt resist anymoreโhe bucks his hips a few times, fucking his cock into your hand while he lets out a string of breathy curses. his head is tossed back, his eyes shut tightly, and his mouth hanging open as he continues to let out the most sinful sounds.
your hand picks up the pace and he sits still in his seat once again, looking down to watch the way you jack him offโskilled fingers wrapped firmly around his girth, hand moving up and down his entire shaft, thumb sliding over his tip. โoh, fuck..โ he groans, his grip tightening on his chair, โfaster.โ he scoffs when you do the opposite, rolling his eyes as your hands slow down. โyouโre such a tease, yโknow that?โ he huffs, glaring down at you, โcโmon.. go faster.โ despite his commanding tone, his expression is pleading for you to fist his cock againโteary eyes glaring down at you, scowling lips trembling ever so slightly, and his face dusted with a bright red.
โcโmon, will you- ohh, shit..โ he cuts himself off with a groan, his eyes widening when you flick the tip of your tongue over his throbbing tip. he watches you lick his tip once again before you move your face down, eyes on his as you drag your tongue up the length of his dick. a shiver goes down his spine from all your teasing licks, a low groan emanating from his throat the longer you keep running your warm, wet tongue all over him. โenough teasing,โ he huffs, bucking his hips again.
you press a kiss onto his aching cock before wrapping your lips around it and your teasing lasts for a little while longer until his self-restraint shatters. one hand lets go of his chair and resting on top of your head for a moment before pushing you down. he lets out the most sinful groan as he forces you to take the entirety of his thick cock into your mouth, his actions only spurred on as you gag and glare up at you through teary eyes. his hold on your head lets up just a bit as he groans, โi told youโenough teasing. hurry up and- ohhh, fuck..โ
you immediately started bobbing your head at a fast pace, teary eyes locked onto his as you repeatedly pulling his cock out of your throat only to send it back in just a second later. he holds a hand on top of your head, his fingers buried into your hair as his hand follows your headโs bobbing. his free hand is still digging into his chair, his nails nearly puncturing the seatโs leather covering as he lets out a short string of low groans and whines, his head falling back and his eyes rolling back to match. everytime your tongue grazed over the underside of his cockโthe tip of the warm muscle gliding over a thick and sensitive veinโhe could feel himself getting closer and closer, feel that knot in his gut getting tighter and tighter.
you moaned with him in your mouth, the vibrations shooting up his body and causing him to whine and groan louder. your hands grip at his thighs to keep yourself stable, keeping up with your rapid pace as your eyes continue to sting with tears from the many, many times youโve taken him into your throat. you keep trying to blink away your tears, only causing them to drip down your cheeks as the cock in your mouth gets impossibly harder at the sight. kunikuzushi curses under his breath and brings both hands up to guide your head up and down, using your throat as a toy for his own pleasure. you gag and moan, whine and cry as his cock continuously drives itself deeper and deeper into your throat and the noises only spur him on.
โfuck.. fuck, itโs so fucking good..โ he moans gruffly, his cock throbbing and twitching wildly within your mouth until he pulls himself out from your mouth. he chuckles deeply as he watches you wince at the salty taste splattering onto your lips and tongue, most of his cum decorating your face, โso pretty like this, so fucking pretty like this.โ he drags his fingers over your skin, gathering a bit of his cum before slipping his fingers into your mouth, moaning softly when your tongue quickly laps it all up. after a few seconds? he pulls his fingers from your mouth and wraps his hand around his stiffening cock, slapping it against your face gently before slipping it into your mouth once again.
WHAT THE FUCKK???? HOLY SHIT THIS GODLY THANK YOU FOR BLESSING US WITH THIS
android x reader | 35.6k | 18+ & dc
In this world, androids outnumber humans, privacy does not exist, and your public profile determines whether you sink or swim in society. Following the dissolution of your job and glamorizing your resume, you're invited to interview with the prestigious Hyperionโthe world's foremost in AI and roboticsโfor a position to test the newest android model. after a surprising turn of events, you're introduced to Elio, the first of the generation seven androids and the catalyst of your awakening.
warnings; dark content, dubcon, themes of lack of bodily autonomy (mc + the android), forced insemination, breeding kink, forced pregnancy (not mc), implied abortion (not mc), major "mother wound", dystopian scifi setting, extreme classism, power imbalance, emotional manipulation, gaslighting, tragedy, graphic details, graphic depictions of body horror (towards the end), physical assault, deragatory descriptions (e.g. lepers, diseased, savages, unwanteds), drug use, heavy world building, heavy details & prose, dividers used between scenes!!
reposted from 2kmps; previously proofread by @ceruleansol
this story took six months from conception to end piece to complete. I am on my knees begging, please reblog + interact with this story!! I'd absolutely adore hearing your thoughts on it!
if you'd like to hear my thoughts about the story, I have some author's notes at the very end + q&a!
Researcher Kim knew you were a liar.
Within the confines of four colorless walls and a closed door, this job interview suddenly felt more like an interrogation than it did some professional courtesy. He sat adjacent to you behind a dark brown desk that pulled the slightest red hue in a chair that was expensive and ergonomic, holding a thin tablet with a tense grasp.
One thing you noticed right away was his inclination toward long stretches of silence while he studied your resume, dissecting every piece of it and your public profile. There, he could window-shop you, peel back every layer of your history without needing you to add credence to anything, or give you the chance to defend yourself when he'd inevitably find things he didn't like.
So, you spent your time sitting in a sleek chair with flat padding, ass aching, legs and feet consumed by pinpricks and static while you dug a nail into your cuticles because the pain kept you alert.
Researcher Kim was an attractive man in his late thirties, maybe mid forties if you were being mean, clean-shaven, dressed comfortably beneath a stark white lab coat that didn't quite fit his shoulders right. What drew your eyes down were his own clean nails, hairless knuckles, and a conspicuously bare ring finger. It didn't surprise you that he was unmarried. Most people these days wereโit was a useless pursuit, an antiquated system that held no social or economic benefits.
Not anymore.
Not since Hyperion Project was funded some sixty years ago, and androids became the forefront of innovation.
In the beginning, there was doubt, fear, and violence toward the first generation of androids, most having uncanny human likeness that definitely inspired aggression because their appearance and robotic intonations were received as mockery.
By Generation Three, shortened as G3 in most casual conversations and official documents just as their predecessors, a new normalcy had burrowed its roots deep and settled with unwavering confidence that it would be there to stay.
The need for delicate human touch became obsolete in most professions. Courts were no longer solely represented by fickle suits but steadfast machines that harbored no ire or prejudices, corporations saw efficiency more than triple without employees who fell ill and needed vacations, and the death industry welcomed undaunted hands into their ranks.
Once, Retro Cityโs Metropolitan Hospital spent the majority of their staff budget on androids meant to replace their surgeons. You remembered the media coverage, the picket lines and strikes, how the hospital was forced to shut down for several weeks as a result of the doctors and hundreds of nurses walking out. Many patients died during that time from infection and negligence, laying in piss and shit with gangrenous bedsores, already four days into postmortem rigidity before the smell became too much and they were carted away in black tarps.
That entire ordeal happened before you were even thirteen, but the hospital fell beneath the scrutinizing lens of the entire world after that and began ethical and legal debates on implementation of androids into society. It became known as The Retro City Metropolitan Incident, globally recognized and considered to be one of the first human rights laws to come into creation during a time when there was question of whether humans and androids could coocur.
Only a few years after that, you just having freshly turned seventeen, united leaders reached a consensus on the Public Profiles Actโsomething you didn't realize would have such a drastic impact on your life later on, wherein any governing bodies, employers, or well-funded institutions were granted access to all of your private information regardless of relevance.
The acts of a child, a teenager, were now a consequence to the adult self.
At the start, just as with Generation One, there was complete chaos and rancor toward this theft, these stealers of privacy and identity, but people had already started accepting androids at that point and knew bigwigs no longer had intentions of sacrificing their profits to hire humans they found subpar.
There was no need to.
People backed down and became quiet, submissive, and began to follow this new order loyally so they'd have a chance to find a seat at the table.
Many did.
Mother raised you to be one of them because it was the only thing that made sense anymore. If you followed the status quo, it would be rewarded with a feast and gleaming silverware. To be emboldened and resilient meant licking chunks of meat out of vomit on the ground.
You adhered and found a job, camaraderie with others, and touched an android for the first time because your peers said it was fine, that it was normal, that it was just an android. Of course, it was unable to feel or deny you, so it pulled down your pants and indulged you the same way you expected the android Mother owned indulged her.
It had hardly been an intimate experienceโall faithful, ingrained functions built into a database in the androidโs brainโbut the sensation of hands surrounding you, a tongue stroking you, and lips pecking your flesh was real, and that's all you had wanted at the time, to know a fraction of the feelings you had read about growing up yet never knowing because people didn't want to touch each other anymore.
Not them. Not you.
โDid you read the job description in its entirety? For the auditor position?โ Researcher Kim gave a tepid smile, seeing you startle in your seat, suddenly pinned by your wide stare. โI'm sorry. I have a habit of getting carried away with the little details. Everyone's public profile is so individual, it takes some time to get to the parts that matter. I have to ask every candidate that question.โ
โYes, ahem,โ you choked on your embarrassment, trying to bide time to scrounge up whatever trivial nuggets from the job description you could. When nothing came to mind, you did the next thing and that was to just talk. โOf course. I was honestly surprised that Hyperion had put up an application. It isn't very often that you guys are hiring.
โSo, when I saw it, I knew I had to apply immediately because the opportunity to be part of such a groundbreaking company wouldn't come back around again. The position being for an auditor just makes it all the more amazing. I'm, honestly, honored that I was called in to be considered for candidacyโฆโ
โWell, thenโฆโ
Every bit of anticipation that welled up inside you crumbled once Researcher Kim rose from his chair and went to the door, the waiting room now appearing to you through the open threshold.
It was a barren space minimally furnished with hard chairs you had already sat in, a few tropical plants with leaves bowing from layers of dust, and most remarkably, a long corridor made of floor-to-ceiling windows offering an exceptional view of Retro Cityโs landscape that seemed to go on forever, limitless. You wanted to be stolen by the sights again, now especially since it was approaching the early evening, and soon the city would be aglow in neon and shimmering lights from faraway skyscrapers.
It wasn't all that bad, you found yourself thinking while walking in stride with Researcher Kim, silent as he perused something on his screenโpossibly something incriminating, possibly another candidateโs public profileโit didn't really matter to you at this point.
You had known glamorizing your resume meant risky business if you were caught: a hefty fine from Public Control, a strike against your profile that replaced the green sheen for abiding citizens with red overlay, permanently marking you for contempt until the day you died.
Back then, two glasses of lukewarm wine worked well enough to weld steel in your backbone to send off the application, whilst a third glass made you wonder just how awful life in the slums along the outer perimeters of Retro City could actually be. At the time, it seemed like your obvious future since severance packages would only get you so farโa few months if you were precious about it.
At present, the loud hum of anxiety receded into an echo that then wilted into obscurity as your gaze drifted from the final traces of a sanguine city skyline to the end of the corridor and then finally to Researcher Kim. He lifted his head as though detecting your stare.
โIn your previous position, what relationship did you have to the androids in your environment?โ Kim asked. It wasn't a strange question. Some people still held fragments of old embitterment toward androids for the way the world now was. โYou were in marketing and merchandising for several years, right?โ
ย โGoodโuh, amicable, I'd say. How I was with the androids, I mean.โ You weren't expecting him to continue talking to you about this. โI started out as an intern for the merchandising manager after graduating secondary school. I worked my way into marketing a couple years later. I did a lot of reports on demographics for cosmetics. Did I tell you my mother has a Hyperion android, by the way? I grew up with him.โ
Researcher Kim showed you a fast, cordial smile before looking back down at his tablet. โYes, I read about that in your associations tab. It says that your mother owns a G3 model. Has she ever considered upgrading to a G6?โ
โUpgrade? Definitely not.โ You laughed like you'd just heard the punchline of a joke. He looked at you with humorless patience, seeming more machine than man in that moment. โMother is basically in love with Marcos, there's no way she'd give him up for something shinier. She's got a better record of him and all his updates than she does of me forโฆ well, anything.โ
โThat does correlate with data we've collected from women of her generation,โ Kim said, only half-interested, shaking back one of his coat sleeves to check the digital watch digging tightly into his wrist. โIt also explains the large gaps in your personal history. Very unusual.โ
You made no comment on that.
A door up ahead opened all the way, drawing both your gazes to a man waiting on the other side.
โAh! Excellent timing, Elio.โ
With a single look, you immediately deduced that he was an android. Even from a short distance, he appeared tall and broad-shouldered, something that the thickness of his clothes couldn't hide from you. His proportions were balancedโfrom the length of his arms and legs, from first knuckle to fingertip, jawline to neck, the slope of his nose, and the heaviness of his brows over amber eyes that glistened back the fire in the weakening sunset. His skin was deeply tan, almost glowing gold in the light he was bathed in.
Elioโs smile was symmetrical and breathtaking, programmed in a way where his teeth didn't show too much. He regarded you with convincing familiarity, a sort of sacred fondness you knew nothing of, yet instinctively made your insides shift and burn. You couldnโt help but be awestruck by his beautyโthis essence of fantasy, perfection that stirred subtle unease and needles on your scalp that ached as much as delighted you.
โYou must be the auditor.โ He then spoke your name with considerable warmth, like a long-smitten friend, and stepped closer to shake your hand. โI am Elio. The first of the Generation Seven Hyperion androids. It's a pleasure. I am looking forward to this partnership. I hope you are as well.โ
Your head swiveled to Researcher Kim for the right answer, unsure if it'd be too bold to assume the job was yours or if the scientistโs careful observation meant something better. He jotted a note on his screen with a stylus before walking away, onward past the door where Elio had been.
โWeโll talk about those formalities later,โ Kim assured, guiding you and Elio through a duplicate hallway to an elevator that he sent to the basement floor. โFor now, I'd like to show you something. I want you to understand the significance of our work here at Hyperion, and how your position is a critical component to our research.โ
There was a hopeful leap in your chest that made your hands sweat and your mouth bone dry. You wanted to voice appreciation, but the excitement in your gut was fast turning into nausea and would end up on his shoes if you opened your mouth.
Researcher Kim didn't notice, taking your quiet as newfound reverence. He spoke easily over the elevatorโs mechanical hum without losing interest on his screen. โI'm sure you know some history about Hyperion? I don't need to bog down our time going through it, do I?โ
โI know enough,โ you said, but that actually meant you knew very little at all. โItโs been around for sixty years or so. It's a leader in AI and robotics. The biomedical side of things is fairly new, started about a decade ago, I think? I heard that the worldโs first total artificial lung transplant was done by a surgeon and android assistant last year.โ
โAh, you mean Altan.โ There was some measure of emotion in his tone, a swell of pride and the hazy look of a man in reminiscence. โI was part of that project on the programming side. Altan was probably the greatest success in the G6 models and is still utilized by Retro City Metropolitan even now. Much of Altanโs programmingโadvanced problem solving, dexterity, fine motor skills, discerning subtle differences in patient statusโwas implemented into Elio. It'd be a waste not to.โ
Your stomach muscles clenched when the elevator stopped, metal doors scraping as they receded and opened up into a capacious white basement that underwhelmed by looking sterile and untouchable, revolted you in your first steps out by dense air reeking of chemicals.
Researcher Kim went on ahead again, that impassive mask of his remaining despite the smell being enough to bring you to a halt.
โI can take us back up.โ Elio said from your left side, apparently never having gone from it in the first place. You had forgotten he was there at all. โItโs been reported that people unaccustomed to this environment have mild side effects of nausea, vomiting, headache, malaise, dizziness, fainting, and, oddly, numbness in the jaw. No fatalities or hospitalizations of guests are known, and the agents used here are nonlethal to humans.โ
An android was made up of mostly inorganic matter, so you weren't reassured by words from his repertoire as much as you were seeing Researcher Kim standing uprightโflesh, blood, and boneโgesturing you closer to a row of tall metal capsules. There were seven total, each the average height of a man with long sheets of clear fiberglass giving unobscured sight inside. And of those seven, six were occupied.
They were all androids.
Against shafts of dim white light spearing up from the floor, the decommissioned machines were a ghostly sight to behold with glassy, inhuman stares that shot straight through you. Some had features and skin so dull and dead-looking that it was obvious to you that they were part of earlier generations.
Almost a century ago, they were what people would've thought of with the word โandroidโ: an eerie, oddly accurate sameness to the human visage, but all wrong at the same time.
It was the skinโthe fabricated organ made to look waxy and stretched, just like a mask over some true horror beneath. It was the eyes resembling human irises in every way possible except for their vacant sheen, perpetually stuck with the gaze of a dead fish. You watched videos of them in school, always uncomfortable with how stiffly their lips moved, unable to form delicate shapes with their mouths, and yet sounds emerged from voice boxes deep within their throats that mimicked everything natural to you.
Every smile seemed more like an ugly rictus than a bewitching grin. Hyperion had failed with Generations One and Two to instill confidence, and from the throes of violence and resistance rose Generation Three:
The great rebirth of society.
Marcos was a part of that era, an investment that cost Mother her entire life savings because his countenance was so convincingly human, so lovely to look at that she felt he was all she needed. You had come along after his purchase, never knowing a fatherโs embrace but had Marcosโ. His skin had a luscious glow, eyes that could follow, and lips molded with lively color and cracks and mesmerizing fluidity.
You had imagined sex with him as you matured, his frozen beauty always the centerpiece of every blurry fantasy while you chased after pleasure. Not long after the Public Profiles Act passed when you were seventeen, nearly on the cusp of young adulthood and not understanding the world any more than you had before, nor how it would be changed forever, you kissed Marcos at the dinner table while studying for a physics test.
He was Mother's, but everything within his circuitry and programming could never deny youโa human, his better, one of countless masters in the endโso his lips pressed fully with yours. Only Mother unlocking the front door stopped you from anything else devilish.
You never had the courage to touch him again, and he would never touch you unprompted.
The defunct G3 encased behind fiberglass reminded you of that time. It must've shown on your face because Researcher Kim moved in closer to get your attention.
โYour mother should upgrade soon. Once the testing period for G7 ends, all G3 models will be taken out of production and their updates discontinued. Androids are machines, but they won't stay fully functional without regular tuning.โ he said. โNow, as I was sayingโโ
โWhat will happen to Marcos, then?โ It was mostly curiosity that made you ask, envisioning him encased in metal like that came after. โWhat happens to androids after they're taken out of production entirely? There are almost more of them in the world now than humans.โ
โAs I was sayingโโ Researched Kim bristled, enunciating with some force. โMany androids of previous models stay within the workforce until they simply can no longer function. It depends on the generation, but older models can only go for a few years without regular updates. The technology is just too archaic, none of the programmers are interested in continuing the maintenance.
โG4 and G5 show some endurance, there's a small population still functioning in Retro City after being discontinued a decade ago. G6 we are hypothesizing will last upwards to twenty or thirty years without being forcibly reclaimed. Of course, they will have to be.โ
You didn't understand why that was but nodded gravely, looking at the pod at the end of the row. The empty one. โWhat about G7?โ
To this, all of Researcher Kimโs lines smoothed out, and his face resumed one of skilled impassivity. โWell, now, that's going to depend on Elio's testing period. On the information we gather from you.โ Then, he waved airily to the file of android coffins. โHyperion has, consistently, only ever hired one auditor for every new generation. The six before you have contributed to society in ways that humans never have before. Auditors have changed the world, shaped it into what it is now. Can you imagine the world any other way? We're not quite the same age, but can you recall anything different? Would you want it to be?โ
You didn't know how to talk back to a scientist, didn't know how to respond to such a momentous question, so you didn't try. It felt like your tongue had swollen in your mouth over your throat, blocking any intelligent snip you had simmering in your head.
Apparently, your silence meant something to him as his tense lips lifted into a smile, the kind meant to satiate strangers looking at you. โGood. Let's go back to my office. We can go over everything else there.โ
โIs Elio going to end up in that pod?โ You now visualized him in a box instead of Marcos.
Researcher Kim was already nose down into his tablet again, stylus making a gentle scrawling noise across the screen. โOf course. The first android of every generation is kept intact. They are important monuments of success to Hyperion.โ
He said nothing else and ambled on for the elevator at the opposite end of the lab. Somehow, his answer was unsatisfactory to you, shallow, even, but you weren't sure why that was. In the end, after a life of serving their masters, all androids were obsolete machines.
That was their inevitable fate.
You saw Elio from the corner of your eye. All at once, you were reminded of his staggering radiance, wondering how he could fade into the background so easily despite it.
โHello, Elio.โ you said to him like a friend. โDoes being down here bother you?โ
Until now, he had stared upon everything flat-eyed and unreadable, especially in the presence of Researcher Kim. You were too enthralled by all the chatter and immortal trophies to see that or him. Still, he came to you with the same smile as he introduced himself with, warm and familiar, all the same sensation as flickering tinders on a crisp winter night.
โCan you imagine the death of the most distant relative you know?โ he said in a neutral voice, continuing, โIf you can, imagine that for me. A relative so distant and removed from your life and everything in it that if they were to die suddenly, maybe tragically, even, your first thought would be, โwho?โ You attend a wake because it's the rule and view this distant, far-removed relative in their casket. What would it mean to you, then? Are you more affected now? Does their death have meaning to you? Or is it simply that you are in the presence of one who has expired?โ
โIโI don't know.โ You hesitated, unearthing scant memories from the Retro City Metropolitan Incident in your youth and all that death from people you had never met. Mother had been in tears when the television flicked to a shot of black tarp-clad bodies being loaded into unmarked vehicles and driven away. โIsn't most death justโฆโ You licked your lips. โSad?โ
Elio was closer than before, resting a hand on your shoulder. You shied from his touch. It felt strange, heavy, and hot through the fabric. The only person to have touched you at all in recent memory was your friend, Melby, though even those happened in isolated moments of drunken elation.
โMy apologies.โ Elio didn't show offense, letting his hand return limply at his side. โIt's all figurative. I have been down here many times since creation and seen the others. They may no longer have their own consciousness, which is different from a humanโs, but I contain all of their dataโmemories, experiences, history. I suppose the equivalent of what I'm trying to describe is: They're not truly gone because they are the lesser of me, and I am the greater of them as a result.โ
You listened without fully comprehending because it had never mattered to do so before. If this were to be your job, however, it would mean you needed to believe that what he said was worth hearing.
The problem was they all liked to speak in complex riddles that men like Researcher Kim could decipher and nod along to sagely, gleaning whatever nebulous mechanical wisdom there was, yet people like you could only gawk.
Elioโs head tilted a little, his smile not at all ridiculing as he corralled you with his arm, never touching you as he guided you along to the elevator where Kim waited, reveling in a satisfied quiet until you were on the upper floor again.
The city skyline was swallowed by dusk and starless. Unless you took the time to drive hours outside of Retro City into the barren flatlands where vegetation no longer grew and animals had left behind their skeletal remnants, you'd never know the sky could glitter with the jewels of the universe far beyond your reach.
You marveled at the lights, at blinking neon signage cycling through animations of winking women and toppling martini glasses. Between twinkling skyscrapers, the city floor was illuminated yellow with bustling nightlife, the air surrounded by an electric blue aura that reached as far as the eye could see.
โBeautiful, isn't it?โ Elio lingered outside of Researcher Kimโs office with you, hand holding the door ajar. โIf permissible, I'd like to see it up close soon.โ
โSure.โ you said, glimpsing at his reflection in the walkway glass. โWhat would you want to look at first? Retro City has everything you could ever want within a few blocks of each other.โ
He turned to you. โWhatever you like. I want to know everything that you love and enjoy doing. I have been created to enrich your life and fulfill you, after all.โ
Nothing he said felt as impactful upon delivery as it was expected to be, you thought. It was a flaw in all androids for there to be a sort of hollowness in the things they saidโnever quite reaching that emotional believability, leaving you wanting like a dry throat after a couple sips of water.
Elio hadn't sounded the same as before down in that sobering, chemically smelling lab. As you passed him into Researcher Kimโs office, you looked at his hands for a script and saw them empty.
He fixed you with a beguiling smile.
You frowned, heat flaring in your head as if provoked by an insult.
โThe contract I'll have you sign outlines Elioโs testing period lasting one yearโthree hundred sixty-five days total. It's important for you to understand that within that time frame, no damage is to occur whatsoever to his body or internal components. All parts are to stay intact. Otherwise, it turns into a criminal case, in which we will legally pursue.โ Researcher Kim skimmed the first few pages of a heaping stack of papers, pointing to specific paragraphs and clauses highlighted in yellow. โI don't mean offense when I say this, but it's rare that fines as result of property damage to Hyperion androids can be repaid. I don't suggest finding out.โ
The thought never occurred to you, but evidently, it had to someone elseโmultiple times for it to be such a focus. You weren't given the time to fully explore any page before Kim was onto the next. Elio half sat on the desk before you, arms crossed, having considerably less difficulty keeping up with the pace of things than you were.
Researcher Kim sped through half the stack. โI'll be conducting video calls every Friday morning for updates. Every Sunday before midnight, I want a thorough typed report submitted to me as well. I've put together a template and a checklist that I'd like you to use. I think you'll find it will make things more manageable.โ
โYou're using a lot of โIโ and โmeโ statements, so I'm guessing that I'll only really be talking to you, then?โ you asked, tucking your tailbone beneath you to relieve a dull ache creeping up your back. โI figured there'd be more than one person since Elio is the newest model and whatnot.โ
Researcher Kim tutted, rounding his desk to occupy the empty space beside your chair to be directly in front of Elio. At first, he did nothing but stare at the android in complacent silence, hands behind his back, fingers flicking like writhing worms exposed to the surface and sunlight in a clump of dirt.
You nearly lunged to your feet when his hand shot out, gripping Elio beneath the jaw. The latter barely stirred from where he perched on the desk, arms staying crossed, muscles unflinching in direct opposition to your reaction.
Elio wore the strangest expression, one you had never seen on an android before. It was a face warped in subtle disgust, almost imperceivable, a trick of fluorescent lighting overheadโperhaps. Gone as quickly as it had come, he now looked ahead, perfectly inscrutable and disinterested in whatever Researcher Kim was trying to prove.
โI will be the only one you speak to during his testing period because he is my creation.โ Kim said, bending his wrist to turn Elio's face toward you.
Your eyes met.
โHyperion provided me with the funding and brilliant minds, but Elio is the result of a lifetime of hard work and countless hours and sleepless nights. I've been there every step of the wayโprogramming, circuitry, welding. I gave him his voice. I gave him eyes. I was the one to put the chip in his brain and activate him. I gave him life.โ
He finally let go of Elioโs face and took a seat behind his desk, a sight growing very familiar to you. โGeneration Seven will change the world. Hyperion is on the verge of rebuilding society, you know? I don't think anyone anticipated the sort of consequences that came with integrating androidsโat least, not fully. The population crisis. The slums. No one thought of these things in the beginning because back then, before you and I, it was about innovation and novelty and the potential of it all.โ
โWhat's it about now?โ you asked simply.
โRectifying.โ Both corners of his mouth ticked like he had a lot more to say, but suffocated much of it behind his teeth and his hands as he came forward on them, elbows down on his desk. โHyperion has been working globally with united leaders and their governments to make amends for several decades now. That's all I can tell you.โ
โHow has that been working out?โ
His fingers moved with the same jerkiness as dying legs on a bug. โSlowly.โ
Nothing else came to mind after that as you were suddenly struck with the realization that Elio still sat by you, wordless throughout the entire interaction and watching closelyโless like a science project to be gawked at, more like an instructional video on repeat.
โWhy don't you touch him?โ Kim said, taking up a stylus to flick between his fingers with remarkable dexterity.
He didn't give you the time to gape.
โI know you must be curious after being downstairs. Aren't you interested to know what he feels like? He doesn't look like a machine, does he?โ
โNo.โ You relented. โNo. He doesn't.โ
โThat's right, he wouldn't.โ Kim nodded his approval toward your obedience, leaning back in his seat. โI agonized over every facet of his design, as you already know. Every bit of what is right in front of youโโhe made a broad gesture over Elioโs bodyโโwas once a set of blueprints. Intangible, just a dream I had. He's every bit a part of me, you know? Nothing would make me happier than to receive external feedback on him. So, please, don't be afraid.โ
Elio stayed faithfully when you rose up in front of him and reached for his face. He probably felt your fingers tremble as this was all counterintuitive for you to doโtouch someone other than yourself, maybe Melbyโs knee beneath the table after enough drinks in you. It made your chest drum, knotted up your stomach in a way that made it difficult not to sway on your feet.
โHow does he feel?โ Researcher Kim was already writing on his screen. โDescribe it to me.โ
โStrange.โ You pretended this was already part of your job. It stole some of the tension from your shoulders. โVery strange. Soft. Smooth. I feel some texture. I think this is what another personโanother humanโfeels like.โ
Elioโs face shifted against your hands until the fullness of his lips pressed into your open palm, fingers caressing the fabricated bones around his cheek and temple. For a moment, you allowed yourself to indulge in longing and weaknessโthe invisible hot breath on your skin, the slight dampness of his kiss burning an imprint in your mind.
He still looked at you with unfailing softness. Meanwhile, you wondered if he would bleed if you put your fingers through his eyes.
โThis is a good start.โ Kim waited until you were back in your chair to offer you his stylus and a straight black line on the screen. โAll I need is your signature here to consent to virtually signing the rest of your documents. Once you do that, you've been hired, and we can begin.โ
โI have a question for you before I do.โ You tried not to let your voice quiver, uncertainty meddling over all the confidence you had built until that point. Kim was relaxed in his chair. โYou spent a lot of time looking at my resume and public profile earlier. Surely, you knowโฆโ
That you're a liar? Oh, I know, alright. He didn't say it, but it was how he maintained his composure, that inexpression never flexing to confusion.
Finally, Researcher Kim broke the trance and hovered over his desk on his arms to get closer and answered, โI think we both have something at stake here. I'm looking forward to your phenomenal feedback.โ
You signed the contract and melted under Elio's resplendent smile.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Most often, your days with Elio were spent in a seemingly perpetual impasse of unrelenting observation between the pair of you. Both of your jobs demanded a level of attentiveness that came easier to one but more as the world's most impossible challenge to the other.
You weren't accustomed to this type of careโof having to give it to something else, even less to receive it from something else. In your world, only the immediate complexities really mattered: gossip, where your coterie wanted to spend the night drinking next, mass media hysteria of whatever stupid imagining there was now, and each other.
Why was there a need to concern yourself with anything else? The decaying state of the world wasn't your doing, nor was the staggering increase of human bodies in the slums outside Retro City. Sharply inconsistent birth rates ravaged on a global scale while people were displaced from the workplace in lieu of employers finding it less of a hassle to deal with machines than the capricious will of humans.
None of these things were allowed to be uttered casually unless in derision because it was too intense, making liquor cling to the throat like some viscous membrane until it burned their esophagus. Nobody liked unanswerable questions, much less talking about things that weren't as easily digestible as coworker drama and some new viral trend that involved shocking your android with jumper cables attached to a portable battery to see what happened.
โIs there a purpose behind this trend?โ Elio dried a plate while watching the video, unimpressed but not driven toward any particular emotion. โIt's all meant for humor, correct? I have several similar incidents in my memory, except it's what human beings have done to each other. This sort of behavior towards androids is a relatively recent phenomenon, as far as I can tell.โ
You used his response as material for your report, fingers flurrying across the virtual keyboard on your tablet before his words faded away, out of your mind.
One thing you hadn't anticipated after accepting the auditor position from Researcher Kim was how much work actually went into it. You spent well over the standard weekly work hours to collect enough observations to send off to Kim on Sunday nights, often whittling away at it until the latest hours, minutes before the deadline. It was hard enough to stay on top of his demands, but it was worse when he found something unsatisfactory, rejected it, monotonously unloaded heavy criticism on you through an โemergencyโ impromptu video call, and expected two full reports by the following Sunday before midnight.
Any regular person probably would've caved from the enormity of the task, but you had surrendered your choice to be that weak-willed, especially once Researcher Kim showed his hand with the fate of your public profile in it.
Should you choose to break the contract, send Elio back to Hyperion, and pretend none of it happened, you would lose everything and your ability to do anything at all besides rot in the slumsโscarred in red for life, perpetually inert.
Worst of all, your associations tab, once filled with still portraits of everyone you had ever networked in life, would turn up as empty as the day you had been registered in the census. It was considered social suicide to know anyone with a red profile, so people stayed vigilant and fast, sure to remove them the second it turned.
It had been over a year since the last time you'd done thatโa woman within your group had grown too bold, said too many things that made her seem crazy, so she was booted from the circle, lost all her associations, and who knows where she was now.
โYou look troubled.โ Elio placed down a steaming white mug at a safe distance and turned the handle toward you. Looking inside, you expected the darkness of coffee but were struck with an opposing subtle sweetness and faint pink water. โIt's fruit-infused herbal tea. Your heart rate is above normal resting, and you're beginning to perspire. Caffeine will worsen your anxiety.โ
You knew that but hadn't known you were scraping away slithers of cuticle on your thumb until the warmth of his fingers gently twined with yours. His grip turned firm to keep you from hurting yourself anymore, forcing all the stiffness from your hand once you gave up and simply sat there feeling his skin.
You'd remember to write that down later.
โWould starting a bath be helpful? I could use the last of those eucalyptus and lavender bath salts in the cupboard.โ Elio suggested with great fondness, holding a patient smile even once you drew your hand away and shook your head. You had no interest in undressing and committing to your regular bathtime routine. โPerhaps we could go for a walk, then? It might help to be away from screens for a while.โ
You checked the time on your phone before thinking to look out any window in your apartment. It was ten after six in the evening; there would be enough light left for a couple of laps around the block before needing to worry about being swept up in the cityโs nightlife antics.
โWhere do you want to go?โ you asked, swiveling the barstool around to get up from the counter. โHenrietta's on 5th? You seem to like going there.โ
โI only choose places that you like.โ He already had a tote bag by the handles and a light jacket draped over his arm. โYou have great taste.โ
Elio unbolted the front door, an old thing that wouldn't do much as a barricade against anyone putting their weight on it, and held it open for you to pass through first. The descent to the ground floor was always the most annoying part about living in a loft, but the place had come surprisingly cheap in a tame area of Retro City far away from the slums, so you didn't complain much that your worst issues were a bunch of stairs and some wily types skulking here and there.
The loft wasn't exactly in disrepair but definitely showed signs of character and age by the noisy knocking pipes at midnight and some crumbling brickwork that Elio often swept up and stood staring at for long periods of time when nothing else was happening.
It was strange thinking how scared you were to lose the place after the marketing firm dissolved your position and now how restrictive it felt to be pinned down under someone else's thumb. All it could take was one more rejected reportโa bad mood, evenโand it would all fall apart.
To that end, you made sure to tow the tablet along with you on this trip despite Elio's protests. He only really quieted down when you tucked it away in your crossbody.
โHappy?โ you asked, unsure what to do with your hands now that they were empty.
Elio smiled at you affably, just as always. โIt will be beneficial to take a break. After all, part of your work as an auditor is acquainting me in as many social scenarios as possible. That does require us to leave the apartment from time to time.โ
โBesides thatโโyou waved away that stipulation like a gnat buzzing in your faceโโhow do you think I'm doing?โ
โI couldn't have been paired with a better person.โ He sounded sincere, voice warm like wool. โThe world is as my predecessors have recorded in their memoriesโtherefore, mineโbut I am learning that our experiences are not all universal and cannot be. Two months with you have been my heaven, whereas two months through the memories of my kin have been cruel.โ
A hot feeling behind your ears snuck up on you just then, flooding your head with the beat of your pulse that you followed by ticking your fingers. โSeriously? You're not lying?โ
The world around you was aglow in the golden hour of evening time, embraced by those slowly dying tones of red, orange, and purple that would eventually turn the sky black. Elioโs eyes were on you, soft yet unyielding and saturated in all those burning hues, turning his mellow amber into something more powerful and otherworldly. You didn't believe in the hocus-pocus of auras, but at that moment, you thought his deeply tanned skin was haloed in pure glowing gold in receding sunlight.
โAndroids cannot lie.โ He brought you back to the now, making you aware of the hard concrete vibrating up through your heels and toes as you walked. โMoreover, even if I could, why would I want to? A lie begets a habit of lying, don't you think?โ
โIโm not sure. Maybe.โ You shrugged. โWhy can't androids lie? I've never really considered that as a thing until now.โ
โWhat would be the benefit of a machine that could lie? Lying stems from emotionsโfear, guilt, rage, hatredโall things that I am unable to feel, though I do understand why they are felt. Humans lie to protect themselves or others, to deceive, to damage. There simply isn't any reason why androids should be programmed with that type of functionality. Not when we exist solely for the sake of convenience and pleasure.
โHyperion is a trusted name. People do not ask questions. They don't think twice. They see a product from Hyperion, and they expose all of themselves without hesitation. They trust fully because we are machines, and we cannot lie and deceive and hurt. Perhaps it's when humans realized this that the world changed.โ
You avoided saying anything else by looking everywhere but at him, all around at your surroundings, until you spotted a few familiar street signsโFifth and Third right next to Tanyaโs Great Cuts, Damaskโs Butchery on the corner of Fourth, a number of banal boutiques with competitively garish exteriors all boasting the latest trends, and then Henrietta's just past them.
โDo you know where we are, Elio?โ Now would've been a great time to pull out your tablet, but you didn't dare try. Instead, you reached for the phone vibrating in your rear pocket.
โOf course.โ he said. โWe're past Fifth and moving onto Sixth Street. Henriettaโs is just a little ways down.โ
Melby had sent ten texts regurgitating her daily drama. This time she was talking about how much she hated some of the people Chima let into the group. You swiped to the end, didn't reply, and then returned to your inbox to find two unread messages from Marcos just now.
โYou should visit home soon. Your mother would appreciate it,โ Marcos wrote, implying nothing more, nothing less than just that. It wasn't often that he sent you texts, but he did so consistently every few months in accordance with Mother's moods. Considering your last visit had been in late fall (it was now mid-spring), you'd been anticipating something eventually.
โThat's some great memory you have there.โ Your thumbs skittered busily, first to flood Melby with a surfeit of questions you didn't really have to think about. All the stuff you could mindlessly ask while wholly absorbed in something else, like watching the news or viral videos of people trying to drown their androids in the kitchen sink.
Marcosโ text made you hesitate, thumbs floating in circles over the digital keyboard for a long time.
The phone buzzed. Melby just replied.
It was easy enough to type with your face down. All you needed to do was occasionally watch Elio's feet and yield into the force of his hand pulling your arm here and there. He led you along like that the rest of the way to Henrietta's, picked up a green basket by the sliding doors, never wandering too far out of sight so you could still easily trace him while he shopped.
After a while, the riveting intrigue of Melbyโs drama wore away with a tidal wave of emptiness in its wake once you finally looked up, tucking the phone back into your pocket. It took you a moment for your eyes and brain to acclimate to where you were despite knowing you were in Henrietta's Marketplace, one of the largest in Retro City.
โWhat did you want from here, anyway?โ You picked up a gigantic red bell pepper larger than the entire spread of your hand. It went back on top of the arrangement. โWe were just here a couple days ago. I don't eat that much.โ
Up ahead, flanked by rows of wooden crates with smoothed, varnished slabs and carefully stacked produce, Elio turned to you with a pair of generously sized orangesโone in each handโvibrant with waxy luster settling into the fruitโs porous skin.
You grinned at the sight.
Elio put one back, placed the other one, the better one, into his basket, and waited for you to close the distance. โI watched Wendy Carmichael Can Cook this morning. I've been watching it quite often, actually. She's a self-taught chef who, apparently, lived in the slums her entire life. She managed to work her way up and now owns two David Bugari-rated restaurants. Itโs quite a feat. Improbable, even.โ
You wrapped your hands around a grapefruit in the crate next to you and spun it around. A twinge of something ugly and green swam around your head, flared you up like swatting an old wound. You didn't like hearing him praise someone else.
โShe probably slept her way to the top.โ You were still fidgeting with the fruit.
โThat's not important.โ Elio said, inflectionless. โI watched today's episode, newly aired, and she put together a duck ร l'orange. Considering your current lifestyle and diet, I thought it would be a nice departure from what I usually cook for you.โ
You smiled at that, placing the grapefruit down without collapsing the pile. โI don't want to see a dead duck in my kitchen.โ
โI'll prepare it once you're asleep.โ he promised, bringing one of your hands up to his lips. The shape of them molded against the peak of a knuckle. โIt will be delicious. Trust me.โ
Then he went back to shopping while you envisioned actually kissing himโnot an uncommon thought to have. He wouldn't be able to stop you if that's what you wanted, but instead, you informed him you were going to introduce him to Mother and Marcos.
โTomorrow?โ He checked his wristwatch. It was nearly eight; Henriettaโs closed at eight thirty, and it would be dark outside. Not that it mattered much with how Retro City was illuminated like one gigantic fluorescent bulb at nighttime.
You finally texted back to Marcos. โNo. Tonight. Weโll just go straight there so I can get this over with.โ
Elio seemed not to know how to respond at first, staring in a searching way that creased the skin between his brows, like he was trying to take a cue from your body language while skimming his database for the most appropriate thing. You didn't blame him for his lapse; Mother was mentioned seldomly and Marcos only a little more than that. Even Researcher Kim hadn't managed to collect enough information on your past to feed to Elio simply because there wasn't a lot to tell.
He cleared his throat, righting his features so they were unwrinkled and beautiful. โTonight. Very well. Should weโฆโ He paused, glancing down at the grocery basket of spices, vegetables, an orange, and a whole raw duck wrapped well in brown parchment. โShould we come back another time? I wouldn't want the meat to sit out for a long time.โ
โNope.โ You didn't want to go through the trouble of returning everything where they belonged. Elio wouldn't leave until he did. โLet's just check out. Marcos will handle it.โ
The springtime air was pleasant at night, albeit crisp, when the blur of vehicles whooshed past once the lights overhead turned green. You could make out the colors of them because of how brightly lit the streets were. Neon signage from every corner for as far as you could see turned to life, flickering, humming, dancing with pretty women, hot white or purple or red lettering, and the lights inside most nearby businesses stayed on.
Elio had draped his coat over your shoulders while you hailed a cab. It was too far of a walk to Mother's home across the city, and Elio reminded you again that raw meat needed to be handled carefully.
You told him, again, that Marcos would handle it.
โโโ
The entire cab ride took less time than you thought, relieving Elio who was still hopelessly fixated on the longevity of the raw duck he had wrapped up in a separate paper bag from the produce and spices. From the front seat, the cabbie, perplexingly somehow a human and not an android, constantly looked back at Elio through the rearview mirror and commented almost deliriously about how beautiful he was.
Hearing that the first three times gave you a happy, satisfied buzz in your chest, making you lean more against Elio's side. He was tempted to move his arm out and put it around your shoulders but kept to himself. Beyond those initial comments from the cabbie, however, you had quickly developed an uncomfortable feeling in your belly that wrapped itself tight like a constrictor on your insides.
โI ain't ever seen an android as beautiful as you,โ said the driver, eyes in constant motion from the mirror to the road. โWhat model are ya? Definitely not a four or five. Yer a little too smooth to be a six. Damn, did Hyperion release a new one already?โ
Elio held a polite smile, separate from the gentle, intimate ones that he kept for you. You didn't hear the response he gave to the cabbie because you felt his fingers reach through yours, pulling them apart so you couldn't dig a nail into the corner seam of your thumb anymore.
You spent the rest of the trip testing the weight of his hand, thinking of little less except how deep you'd have to go through his skin to see his circuitry and what else made him up. Those vanished like a white puff of breath in winter when the taxi jerked to a stop on a street curb.
โThank yew for ya business.โ The cabbie lifted his stiff old hat when you paid, eyed Elio a little more, and only drove off after you had knocked on a canary-yellow door up some stone stairs.
You stared at a decorative wreath covered with flowersโfake because the ones used couldnโt grow outside of greenhouses anymoreโhanging dead center on the door. No doubt Marcosโ work because Mother couldn't be bothered with those little nuanced social things.
Marcos answeredโbrown skin and hazel eyes that burnished green in almost any lightingโgesturing for you and Elio to come inside.
โWelcome home,โ he said, far more unnaturally than it sounded coming from Elio. There was a certain rigidity to it, an effort clearly inhuman and lesser. He embraced you in a familiar way, reminding you of all your years of childhood doing this exact thing because your mother didn't know how to love you, and โfatherโ was just a word. โI apologize for messaging you to come over so late. You know how your mother is. When the mood strikesโฆโ
Marcos didn't emit much bodily warmth, never had, even in the golden years of G3, but he was there, and that's all that mattered at the time. His skin was still youthful and flawless, though the longer you looked him in the face, the less real he seemed. His eyes held depth and movement though were slow, less precise, and duller. The lines around his mouth when he smiled were unnatural, appearing to you nearly like bunching folds in a sheet of leather.
It was strange seeing an older generation of android after having acclimated to Elio over two months.
โYour mother is at the dining table.โ Marcos moved on to Elio, taking in his image, surmising that he too was an android. He glanced down at the bags that Elio still held. โMay I take those for you? Hyperionโs innovation continues ever forward, I see. You are new.โ
โThe first of Generation Seven,โ said Elio. The bags were passed between them. โI would appreciate it if you kept the duck refrigerated. It's in the paper bag.โ
โThat's no trouble.โ Marcos turned with Elio following along behind him into the kitchen. โI'd like to hear about Generation Sevenโs potential. What is your maximum I-O? Data? Memory? How have the functions that have been implemented into you differ from Generation Six?โ
Their voices were muffled behind the walls as you crossed through multiple rooms to where Mother sat at the head of a large glossy table made from dark-brown wood. It was a spacious area reserved to eat surrounded by floor-to-ceiling windows in elegant drapes with the best view of whatever the neighbors were doing. She had told you once that the only reason she bought this house was because it'd be good gossip for when she invited her gaggle of catty executive receptionist friends over.
Back then, she hosted her little impromptu get-togethers more often than she remembered to see you off to school. Marcos made sure you were fed and bathed, sat with you in your bedroom to help with homework, and sent you to bed. As you grew, the parties had migrated elsewhere, prompting your mother to go with them.
That had left you alone with Marcos and the boundaryless curiosity of a teenager. You didn't know if Mother still participated in such things now that she was older, less pretty, inclined to more body aches.
โI've been thinking that we should visit the new teahouse that opened up on Aflaat Ave. You never talk to me anymore.โ she said, but it wasn't true. Neither of you talked to one another, just used Marcos as an intermediate. โIโwellโMarcos went through your old bedroom a few weeks ago because I've decided to take up scrapbooking and sewing and needed space, and he found an old shoebox full of your primary and secondary school projects! How quaint! He wanted to make sure you got them.โ
โThat's nice.โ You didn't want to sit down, unwilling to be her fifteen minutes of entertainment before she got bored. She kept on staring at you with wide eyes and crowโs feet and fretful hands, like a woman who still had more to say. โI'll make sure Elio grabs them before we leave.โ
โElio!โ Mother gaped. โMan or android? Certainly an android, right? Men are useless.โ
Your rage was already bunching up and throbbing in the back of your throat. โYes, Mother, an android.โ
โโMotherโ sounds so harsh! How about mama or mummy or mom?โ She kept wringing her fingers together. โAnyway, anyway! Elio! He sounds so handsome. Is that who Marcos is talking to? What a handsome voice! Is he a Generation Six?โ
You still hadn't sat down, though you used your hands to lean across the back of a chair. โGeneration Seven. I'm testing him for Hyperion.โ
โFor Hyperon!โ Mother couldn't fathom you doing more than grunt work at the marketing firm. She didn't know your position had become obsolete. โThis is certainly a surprise. Sit down. How did that happen? You and Hyperion? Are you trying to make me look stupid?โ
โI've been sitting all day. I'm good like this.โ That wasn't a lie. You also just couldn't stand the idea of giving any relief to her anxious state. โIt's my new job. Very coveted. I've been working closely with one of the researchers there, and he can't praise me enough. I'm looking after Elio for a year and then moving on to their next latest and greatest.โ
โYou?โ She spat out a laugh. It calmed the trembling in her hands for a few seconds before she was back at it again. โOh, my. Well. If that's the case, you certainly owe it to me for getting that job. My genetics. My smarts. You certainly didn't get it from your father.โ
That lurching, angry ball in your throat was rising up fast. It was just there on the tongue making you gag, salivate, and begin to drool a bit from the corner of your lips. It tasted horrific and filled you with the most voracious need for venom.
โWho is my father?โ you asked. โYou could be wrong.โ
Mother suddenly grew uncomfortable, flattening her gaze with the tabletop. Historically, she had always been this way when you asked about him, the infamously evasive ghost of your life. It was also the only thing that ever made her shut up.
โThat doesn't matter.โ She continued, โYouโve always had me and Marcos. That's what matters.โ
โI've had Marcos.โ The ball freed itself. โI just thought you should know, Generation Three models are being decommissioned. Marcos won't be receiving any more updates, and eventually, he'll just be a pile of fucking scrap. What're you gonna do then? You can't afford another android because you've sunk every penny you've ever saved into himโhis upgrades, his maintenance, his clothes. It may take about ten years, and you'll probably be on your deathbed, but he's going to fall apart and eventually stop moving. You'll be just as alone as you were before he came along.โ
Motherโs face turned shades, petrified. You wanted nothing more than to see her shrink into her clothes and disappear for good. It soothed you to think about Marcosโ end being inevitable, unchangeable, a fact. Some of the guilt was easier to bury that way.
โWh-What are you saying to me, you awful child?!โ She wailed with watery eyes, hands wrapped in the same colored strands of hair you had. โHow could you?! That's not true! Thatโs not true! Do you know how hard it was to carry you for nine months?! I was so young and I was forced to give birth to you! Forced! Do you hear meโforced to be a mother to a child I never wanted! It was that or death. I never wanted a child because they turn on you and say things like this! You horrible, horrible child!โ
Her shrieks stirred a ruckus from the kitchen where Marcos and Elio emerged from. Marcos ran to your mother, took her in his arms, and cradled her against his chest when she began to shed very real tears that bubbled at the corner of her eyes before falling, curving along her cheeks.
Elio came straight to you, hesitating to put his hands on your body, maybe noticing how viciously you glared at this wilted woman he'd yet to meet.
โGet the groceries. We're gone.โ You stormed straight for the door, chest stuttering with heavy breaths you tried to calm because you knew what came next. Your throat ached, burned fiercely like something had snagged there and you needed to claw it out.
Once you reentered the chilly air submerged in all the dark and light of Retro City at night, it didn't matter that you were crying. They were hot tears that left behind cool traces. They were decades of disappointment, of secretly understanding a motherโs love would always be conditional, of being unwanted and wishing you hadn't been burdened with existing.
Elio came out minutes later, the door closing softly and locking after him. You heard the bags crinkle near you, drawing your eyes away from a blinking parking meter you'd zoned in to calm yourself down.
You said nothing.
โLetโs go home.โ Elio hailed a cab idling nearby and opened the door for you. โI want to keep the meat fresh.โ
Him and that stupid duck.
This cabbie looked back at you both once to get directions, and then only occasionally afterward, casting pitiable glances at your raw-looking face in the mirror. The GPS displayed on the carโs dashboard showed the apartment was thirty minutes away because of traffic, probably from a crash they were detouring; ordinarily, it only took twenty minutes.
When your pocket vibrated, you almost didn't check. Unsurprisingly, it was a message from Marcos, just a single one.
โI don't think you should come around for a while,โ it read. You didn't respond. Nothing new. Some sort of falling out with your mother was routine. You couldn't understand why she thought it'd ever go differently.
However, this time wasn't like all the rest. This time, youโd said something unforgivable despite her doing the same, but yours was worse in her mind. You didn't mind the idea of her disappearing from your life. It was harder to handle the thought that you'd never see Marcos again before he ceased to function, though.
โWhat happened?โ Elio asked, a weird departure from androids being programmed, traditionally, never to pry. โThat woman was your mother, correct? What did you say to her?โ
โWho cares?โ You grunted, sniffing around the burn in sinuses again. โShe's a crazy bitch. She's always been that way. I told her that Marcos would just turn into a scrap heap eventually. Was that wrong of me?โ
โWell, perhaps that phrasing was inappropriate, yes.โ Elio touched your forearm. โBut there is no NDA in place from Hyperion. You are well within your rights to have told her. But, as I said, your phrasingโโ
โI know, shut upโโ You moved closer so you could lean against him. โI hate that woman. I hate my mother more than I ever hated anyone.โ
Elio lifted an arm above you, giving you room to slide in as far as you wanted to go. He held you for the first time, repeating long, weighty strokes down your back, through his coat that you still wore. You were transported back to a moment in time steeped in cloudy nostalgia, blurred.
It was Marcos kneeling at your bedside, yellow overhead lights dimmed to nearly full darkness. The door was shut because otherwise a heap of cackling voices, Mother and her gossiping hens after too much wine, would spear in through the cracks and make you petulant. Marcos had already been trying to get you to sleep for over an hour.
โSleep little one, sleep.โ Marcos had said, voicebox in his throat straining with a quieter sound. โI know it must be difficult. You must be rested for school tomorrow.โ
โThey're too loud.โ you whined, throwing your covers back with a great flourish, feet kicking them the rest of the way off before you huffed and turned to your side away from Marcos. โMake them shut up! Can't you make them shut up, Marcos?!โ
He sighed, defeated as much as an android could be. No, he could not. It went against his programming to disobey his masterโany human who made a demand of him. His order was to get the child to sleep, and that had yet to happen.
โWould you like me to read The Falcon and the Hare to you again?โ It was your favorite bedtime story right now. Hearing fictional stories involving extinct animals seemed to be of odd fascination to you. โMy tone of voice might make itโโ
โNo!โ you fussed, thumping your feet once, twice, three times and going limp again. โCome up here until I fall asleep. Please?โ
Marcos nodded. โYes, little one.โ
He had to keep one leg off the bed to even half fit on the mattress. You sat upright to fix the blankets so to cover yourself and part of Marcosโ one bent knee. His arm laid out on the bed, waiting for you to crawl into it until you were nestled into his side, sucking up what small warmth radiated from his fake body. Once you found a comfortable spot, curled up tightly much like a cat sunbathing in a single shaft of daylight, he began smoothing a hand down along your back, heavy enough to be felt through your thick comforter.
You listened to him hum a song that you liked, one that translated well to his chords and the vibrations in his throat.
He hummed. He petted your back. He hummed. He petted your back. He hummedโฆ
โDo you truly hate your mother?โ Elioโs voice was delicate just then, aware that you were away in some reverie he tried to gently lure you out of. The dream was over. That one silver glimmer of your childhood became far away, forgotten while the sounds of the city rushed back into the cab.
โYesโI mean, I dunno.โ You actually yawned, pushing one of your eyes with the heel of your hand. โI think I hate her. We've argued my entire life. We've never gotten along. Yeah, I hate her.โ
Elio was holding you by the waist now. โIs that why you said what you did?โ
โSaid what?โ You were a little too keen on his thumb swirling around the fat padding your hip bone.
โAbout Marcos being scrapโฆโ
โElio, seriously? Do you ever shut up?โ It was tempting to put yourself on the opposite side of the seat, but you didn't want to give the cabbie any chance to eyeball him. โIโI don't know. She just gets me so mad. I used to be able to crush up those feelings because Marcos told me it wasn't healthy to act on them. But, then, I moved out, and I realized she was still the same, that she'd always stay the same. I stopped hiding it.โ
You were so close to his face that you could see how long his eyelashes were and the shadows they cast on his cheeks.
You looked into his eyes. โI wanted to make her hurt as much as she hurt me.โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Midnight had come and gone before you finally gave up on trying to sleep. You spent the better part of an hour staring up at the high ceiling, imagining every rusting pipe you saw as immobile serpents stretched taut to make the interconnecting structure that sprawled across the entire loft. Swirls and shapes and blacker-than-black shadows danced in front of your eyes, twisted with the pipes, and made the usual knocking sounds within them, but nothing ever came for you.
Downstairs was a careful amount of liveliness and aromas as Elio put together his duck ร l'orange that he promised you. You scarcely heard a sound from him shuffling about but more from the clanking pans, boiling pots, and unintelligible chatter you knew came from the television.
Maybe he was watching a rerun of Wendy Carmichael Can Cook again, maybe a segment from the news because he liked that equally as much.
And yet, as you made your way to the lower floor, mystified by the fact you were standing on your toes to disguise all sound during your descent, you saw that the television was set to an old crime show he watched with you on occasion.
Detective Georgina Reyes and her android sidekick, Regis (G5), were the undisputed heroes of Helcam City and solved every case that came their way with style, finesse, and plenty of moral and ethical dilemmas. The majority of the show was spent within Georgina's inner world and her near-obsessive lust over Regis, who was owned by the department chief.
Ratings for the show had climbed to an all-time high when Regis had gained a sense of self and the ability to defy his programming. For fewer than six episodes, it was complete bliss for fans of Georgina and Regis, but then the season five finale happenedโ
โCan't sleep?โ Elio asked, effectively putting your heart in your asshole, sending your soul skyward. He must have gauged your sudden gray pallor and bulbous glare because he smiled apologetically from the bottom of the stairway. โI'm sorry. I didn't intend to scare you. Were you watching Regis and Reyes?โ
โIโuh, no.โ You sighed, taking slow steps to the bottom to ease your heartbeat eating away at your ribs. โI was thinking about the show ending. Have you watched it yet?โ
โOf course,โ he said. โIt was a peculiar way for the story to end. In my opinion, it was incomplete. Very sudden. It's my understanding that there was an issue with how the government was being represented within the show, and a few of the writers were accused of conspiracy to defraud the government and subsequently arrested for it.โ
โSeriously?โ You scoffed, making it to ground level, and walked around Elio toward the kitchen where all the heavenly smells wrapped around you, enticing you to take a morsel. โIt was the forced pregnancy plotline, right? Creepy stuff.โ
โIndeed.โ
Elio wouldn't let you have any of the duck ร lโorange, saying it was meant for your dinner later on in the day, but he did steep you a hot mug of herbal tea (for sleep), the one that turned water pink, and offered to make you a light snack.
He went back to his tasks after you declined, satisfied well enough with the small swigs you took from your white mug. You spent more time sitting at the counter in silence, watching his back, hoping to gain the power to see through his shirt rather than actually taking interest in what he was doing.
Your eyelids fluttered and fell thinking about the car ride home: his arm around you, his thumb rubbing pacifying circles into your hip, how you'd been close enough to his face to believe you felt a breath leave his lips.
โElio.โ
โYes?โ
He had moved on to washing dishes. When he heard you behind him, he took a clean towel to his hands and quickly dried them before facing you. You guessed you probably had a strange expression right now, or at least, looked at him in a way you never had because the towel was cast aside, draped over the faucet, and his eyes flickered across your face.
โYour heart rate and body temperature have increased.โ he said, giving into the pull of your hands after grabbing both sides of his face. You backed yourself into the countertop while still holding him, thumbs caressing the rise of his cheeks, bringing him down, down, down toward your face where you certainly felt heat blow across your mouth. โYour breathing has changed. I can hear your heartbeat. Don't be anxious. I won't hurt you.โ
You weren't nervous.
You proved it by kissing him, full-bodied, slow, lingering. He gripped the edge of the countertop, bracing his weight against his hands to stifle some aggressive reaction, possibly, and returned the kiss with just as much fervor that you put into it.
His lips were every bit of what you imagined, what you wanted them to be. You had the urge to bite into them a little, to see if they could bleed the same way yours could when you chewed enough on loose skin. Their texture was slightly indented with cracks that gave friction to the moist smear across your mouth.
Although the sounds of the kitchen and ambient hum from the television in the next room stayed as they were, it was like the volume of everything had been set to mute, and only the breathy, wet pops of air and skin made it into your ears. You heard the delicate chatter of teeth inside your head when his mouth roamed the underside of your jaw, down your neck, to the rise of your clavicle, stopping only at where your neckline ended.
His hands had already made home under your clothes, first doing away with your shirt that he tossed over your shoulder onto one of the barstools. Next, he worked on the elastic waistband keeping your sweatpants on your hips. You flinched against his hands when they splayed across your ass, taking all he could in them while his lips continued a downward trajectory, traveling over your breastbone, along the curve of your navel, and then he stopped.
Elio had been on his knees for a while, stirring you so deeply that you had no doubt there'd be damp spots sitting inside your sweatpants, possibly even drying on the inside of your thighs by now. He helped you out of your pants one leg hole at a time while you used his broad shoulders to balance yourself. And soon enough, one of your thighs was hiked up in that same spot, his face hidden from you despite all the work he was doing to well up a hard knot in your abdomen.
You had to take a fistful of his hair and wrap it tight in your fingers, using your other arm to balance against the counter. He wouldn't let you fall, you knew that, but the unsteadiness of your legs grew, trembling violently, turning to lead like being buried under concrete or suctioned by water. He kissed and sucked and stroked you some more, pushing more into the spots that made you moan the loudest and fastest, fingers wandering you busily and lubricated with your own spend.
โElioโElio, let's move somewhere, please.โ You shuddered out, trying to pull his hair, shove his face off of you. โPlease.โ
He grunted, surprising you by relinquishing to the pressure, and made his way back up the route he had taken down. โWhere do you want to go?โ he asked, lips sticking on your throat, rising higher to the protrusion of your chin. โThe kitchen floor? The couch? The bed? We could probably manage in the bathtub as well, if that's what you'd enjoy.โ
โI don't care.โ You were only half-honest and miserable now with the sole focus of trying not to touch yourself to finish. โJustโฆ somewhere, Elio.โ
โAs you wish.โ
Elio hoisted you onto his hips, making sure you knew to squeeze him with your thighs before making his way around the kitchen to turn knobs and shut off the overhead bulbs. The new darkness was refreshing yet did nothing to tame that sweltering sensation between your legs. In fact, you thought you could burst from the anticipation. It was everything you could do not to hump him through his clothes, hands occupied in his tousled hair, lips together with bruising force.
Before long, your back was on couch cushions and the television was off so as to not ruin the moment. You saw dark behind your eyes while you kept them open, unfocused on the ceiling with the serpent pipes because his mouth was already back on you and helping you chase that high.
โYou're almost there.โ His lips smacked against your engorged skin, making your lashes flutter and eyes roll back. โYou look so perfect. When you cum, I'll take my time cleaning you up. I can use my tongue. I can make you cum againโas many times as you'd like.โ
His arms held your thighs wide open, giving him all the room he needed for those final, well-placed strokes that turned your moans into utterly drawn-out, lewd things that made you grateful that no one else lived in this side of the building. Your body wrenched against his continued ministrations, his lips and chin and fingers warm and glistening with your traces.
You had thought to worry, briefly, about something getting onto the cushions under your ass, but Elio had already thought it through and used the dish towel from earlier to catch anything awry.
It came in handy for his face.
โHow do you feel?โ he asked from inside one of your thighs, kissing his way all the way to the point of your knee. โWas it satisfactory?โ
You didn't answer right away, especially not when he came forward on his arms to catch your lips, slowing things down so you could bask in that fuzzy, satiated afterglowโdopamine and oxytocin being that remarkable duo doing their damndest to reinforce how exquisite and ineffably breathtaking Elio was to you.
โWould you like a bath?โ he asked against your jaw. โYou can just lie back and relax. I'll clean you up.โ
โNo.โ Spurred by newfound bravery, you trailed your fingertips between both bodies, first to loosen the tie on his sleep pants, plucking the strings hard so he felt it. Next thing, your hands slipped under his shirt. โI want you to actually fuck me. Put your cock in me.โ
Elio jolted upright, using the tall back of the couch and armrest near your head to hold his body above you. Cold air seeped in all the places where he had been, dotting your skin in gooseflesh, hairs within those follicles standing on end. You were laid out below him, showing all your unobscured nudity and vulnerability, withering yourself just a little smaller under the intensity of his stare.
This was different from the grocery store, where he had needed a moment to amend for information he did not have. This was something elseโflickers of conflict, struggle, restraint, and excitement were ablaze in his eyes, which shifted around within their sockets, giving you glimpses of pure gleaming white, which stood out in the inky dark all around.
โIโare you certain that's what you want?โ he spoke at last, doing little to alleviate the way you felt he had seen your insides and bones. โIt is late, I know you must be tired.โ
โAre youโฆโ You couldn't really explain the uneasiness gnawing at your gut, nor the thrill of wanting him inside of you regardless. Maybe he could fuck the feeling out of you, bring peace to your throbbing heartbeat and blood gushing to your head. โElio, are you telling me no?โ
โI cannot do such a thing.โ he said right away, coming down from his high place to lay the weight of himself across you.
You felt his skin flush to your chest without a thin shirt to hide his shape and muscle that wasn't real, but this was so much more than touching every dissected mannequin in physiology class in school. They couldn't kiss your neck while the interwoven, complex network underneath stretched, elastic flesh contracted and relaxed against your palms.
โWould you believe me if I told you there are certain functionsโprogrammingโthat I cannot override?โ The waistband of his pants collected in a heap of fabric around his knees, freeing room for his cock in the open air. โI won't be able to let you go until I'm finished. I want you to understand that.โ
That sounded hot, and you were tired of him stalling, so you told him you understood. โVery well.โ He kissed you, guiding one of your hands low to his core where you could revel in the size of him.
He was hard in your grip with a good girth and length to him, a curve you'd come to recognize from toys collected over the past decade to hit the right spots. The skin over his cock was much a part of him as the rest on his body, hot, growing damp, and sticky the nearer you wandered to the head.
You had watched old pornography with Melby and the group a few times before from the days when it was just humans performing acts on each other. No one really liked it because it was so dramatized; everyone agreed that one of the actors needed to be an android for it to actually be sexy. You never told them that the moaning men with stuttering hips as they ejaculated was something you did like.
Elio leaned into your palm, the thumbprint starting to prune as you rubbed his tip. More warmth seeped out from it, wet and thick and perplexing and exhilarating because Hyperion made him so perfect, a better being than just an emulation of man.
His cock slid through your hand in short, quick bursts that eventually lubricated his entire shaft. He'd kept himself busy on your lips, tongue in your mouth, swiveling together the taste of you with saliva. It was the most inelegant he had been with you so far, yet you didn't think you'd be bothered if he did this more often.
โFuck me.โ You whined, finally apart from him. The swollen head of his cock made a moist path along your core where you massaged it against every sensitive spot that set your senses into a blazing frenzy. โBe as rough as you want. Hurt me a little.โ
He finally took your hand away, rearranging your legs so one laid across the back of the couch, the other on his hip with a knee shoved under your ass for height.
โI will not hurt you.โ Both your wrists were cuffed by his large hands, pinned down into the cushions by your head. โBut, I cannot let you go. You must see it through until the end.โ
โFuck. Me.โ you said forcefully, uncomprehending to the things he was telling you, uncaring what it all meant.
โYes. Alright.โ
Elio obeyed you as he was supposed to, cock sinking in with care, thrusts starting out shallow until the tip was withdrawn and then back inside again. The angle he had created for you made it easier to take his length. It took a little more time to acclimate to his girth and plenty of gentle encouragement from his voice landing right next to your ear, telling you to relax. It would improve in a few minutes, and he wouldn't let you go to sleep dissatisfied.
Indeed, minutes later, you were well beyond the worst of it and filling the void all around you with harsh, rapturous moans, which Elio enjoyed hearing. His lips lingered at your throat where most of your sounds resonated, fists still holding firm around your wrists, knuckles the same color as the rest of the dark but had actually bled pale.
The springs within the couch cried out, unused to this weight and ruthlessness, while the air stung with cracks of slapping skin timed with your moans. Elio didn't let you move from where he had you laid out, didn't let up on the speed and depth he reached despite how labored your breaths became, broken words eclipsed by panting and his tongue forcing them back down your throat where they stayed in submission.
It was still cold in the early mornings this spring, often leaving your apartment a little less comfortable than you'd like, but right now, you could've been convinced that he was fucking you on the ground in the flatlands and believed it. Your skin was slick with sweat, the mess between your bodies slippery and undoubtedly staining the couch underneath.
Just then, the weight on your wrists climbed higher to your hands. He threaded your fingers together at the same time his thrusts began to slow, hips rolling yours like a swaying ship amid languid seas.
The whole time he had been on top of you, edging you closer to another orgasm, he had hardly made a noise apart from whispering in your ear when you'd clench his cock too tight. Now, he was failing to keep quiet from your neck, trembling and grunting on your skin until, at last, one jarring thrust left him breathing out in relief.
He got you to your end shortly after, half-hard cock still throbbing and warm inside you, giving just enough of what you needed while his hand finished the rest with fast strokes. You winced. He didn't let off until your jaw hung slack, whimpering meagerly through the pleasure hampering thoughts and sensations other than pressure releasing from your groin, spend turning a patch of your couch dark.
โYou did well.โ Once he was soft, he tied his pants back around his waist and picked up the sodden dish towel to begin cleaning around your sorest areas. โCome with me. I'll start you a hot bath and make you a new cup of tea before bed.โ
You didn't want to get up from that spot, declared yourself rooted there unless Elio helped you up, and thrust a hand high into the dark room.
He wore a princely smile, you assumed, as he leaned down to pick you up in his arms instead. Moved by such a gesture, you reached for his face with your angry wrists and hands to kiss him all the way to the bathroom.
None of this made it into your next report.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Melby didn't like Elio.
This she had told you over text after you declined her incoming phone call so as to not arouse Researcher Kimโs ire in finding out you were completely distracted during his exorbitantly detailed analysis of your latest reports. Two had been sent in before midnight last Sunday, as usual, since he was rarely satisfied with what you revealed through them these days.
Less than an hour later, while cozied up in bed on your side, facing the chopping blades of an oscillating fan, just beginning to feel yourself teeter off that edge from dull, relaxed awareness into light sleep, your ringtone went offโit was Kim.
โWhat else have you committed to doing lately in terms of Elio's social advancement? The last thing I have hereโฆโ A refreshing, fast pause followed, accented by the sound of paper softly swishing as it was parsed. โHe was brought to a movie theater on the twenty-fourth, Diosyn Park on the twenty-ninth, Henrietta's four times in the last week. That's not nearly enough. Who are you socializing him with? What have their reactions been? How has he reacted to them? You're not writing down exact times.โ
Not once since you'd joined the video conference forty minutes ago did he check to see if you were listening to him, content with his nose being shoved down into a bundle of chemically smelling papers and glowing screens to corroborate previous work he had on file.
That made it easier for you to text back Melby, arguing with her in endless paragraphs too tiring for your thumbs to continuously scroll through that you didn't have time to meet up at Clamors for drinks with everyone.
โShould I tell Chima you hate us?โ texted Melby.
Truthfully, you couldn't tell if it was meant as a threat or if she was just pettish after being refused. One of her worst qualities, never spoken aloud to her face lest she fumbled and blubbered all the way to Chima to snitch about it, was being horridly uncompromising to just about everything.
It made you anxious enough that your fingers started to ache with an urge, on the path toward curling back slithers of cuticle, gathering blood under the nails, itchy scabs that Elio constantly covered with neon bandaids so you wouldn't touch them.
Eventually, you found a new fixation with the seams of your knuckles and fitted the most unrefined part of your nails into them, digging up red that way until he had to cover those, too.
It took you ten minutes with fidgety thumbs to reply. โI don't hate anyone. You know me.โ
Melby's was instantaneous. โWhat about me? Do you hate me now?โ
Another one. โNow that you have that android?โ
More. โWe used to spend so much time together.โ
Last one for good measure to effectively drill a gory black hole straight into your pounding, cowardly heart. In her eyes, anyway. โI haven't seen you in months!โ
โHe needs more direct interaction. I've decided that I'll make amends to the template you've been using up until now.โ Researcher Kim was saying, not seeing you, not hearing you, assuming your loyalty to him and his cause was complete.
Ripples of drowsiness overcame you so powerfully that you left Melby on read, mind suddenly a vast, empty space and quiet for the first moment all day. Your hands rose to cradle your cheeks, propping your head above your elbows on the countertop because Kim's inflated droning had come to have that effect on you over time.
A human man with a face that nice shouldn't be allowed to talk so much. He should go back to moaning on couches in front of cameras and sweltering lights.
โLet me explain what I'm currently changing.โ he said, hopelessly invested in whatever those alterations were just by the mechanical click-clack of fingertips soaring over a keyboard somewhere low and out of sight of his screen. โFrom here on out, I'm going to require that you gather between six to ten direct interactions. I want full disclosure of every conversation, transcribed or recorded. From my standpoint, recording would be the most effective method so I may make interpretations myself.โ
You were thinking of what to ask Elio to make you for lunch. It was almost noon. You unmuted the call. โAm I allowed to just randomly record people talking like that? That seemsโฆโ
โHyperion works closely with Retro Cityโs governing bodies, and by extension, so do you.โ Kim kept typing as he spoke. โIt isn't illegal because the information you're collecting is imperative to the Hyperion Project. Without it, we face the risk of progress slowing or diminishing. That cannot happen, and I cannot emphasize enough that your work as an auditor must come before other commitments.โ
At long last, he pulled his face out of papers and other screens to look at yours. In a fashion unsuitable for him, he sighed in a fatigued way, back collapsing against his ergonomic chair, shoulders lopsided with how he perched his elbows on the armrests.
โRetro City has over three million inhabitants. You won't have any issues finding people for Elio to speak to.โ he told you. โSix to ten for each report. Thatโs all.โ
You were already back in your messages, backtracking your previous responses to Melby, asking her what time everyone was meeting at Clamors.
Right away, โCome at nine!โ
And then, โI'll save you a seat.โ
Finally, โDon't eat too much before getting here. It'll ruin the fun.โ
โFine.โ Phone now face down on the counter, you returned Researcher Kimโs concentrated stare. โI'll do my best. Six to ten. Six to tenโฆโ
That had done well to appease him, demonstrated through a satisfied smile, which pulled his lips just enough that the muscles in his right cheek twitched as though the motion was foreign to him. With how inexpressive he was most of the time, you weren't surprised, thinking it more humorous than anything else.
You struggled to find a smile of your own that wasn't strained, though.
โThat reminds meโโ He positioned himself forward, arms on his polished dark-red desk with a curious gleam in his black eyes. โNone of your reports have instances of copulation mentioned. Have there been complications?โ
You sat stiffly, not agape but definitely not composed, either. โSorry? What was that?โ
โIntercourse. Sex.โ He simplified it for you, almost with a pitying crease forming between his brows. โYou've completed every other area outlined in the template except that one. I haveโฆ refrained from questioning you until now because I do understand that, outside of a clinical setting, it can be construed as inappropriate to discuss.โ
The only person you had divulged any details to was Melby. Even that had been brief and inexplicit because she had immediately changed the topic to something one of the kids Chima invited into the group had done that pissed her off.
โWhy do you need to know?โ It was a defensive question. โIs that something I really need to write about? It's sex. It's just sex.โ
Researcher Kim made an indistinguishable sound behind steepled fingers. They hid away whatever shape his mouth was in at that moment, making the whole conversation terribly uncomfortable. It was odd how exposed you felt like his stare was reaching long, further than just the screen in front of him. He wasn't looking into you or through you but rather right at youโimagining you some other way, unclothing your body with drifting eyes and invisible hands.
You were equal parts embarrassed and repulsed by that line of thinking, allowing your mind to summon up his ghost hands to search you, feel you under all your layers, know you as intimately as Elio had as though part of some extension of himself.
โIt is all outlined in the contract you signed.โ Kim said, now with an edge that made you flinch on the barstool. โAndroids are developed for convenience and pleasure. I have reports for one, not the other. If Elio, as the first of G7, is not performing exceptionallyโif there are complications, if he is defectiveโthat is something you must include within your reports. I don't suspect that to be the case, in this situation.โ
His eyes suddenly caught onto something else, going beyond you, but you chose not to react by looking. โYour work as an auditor has been sufficient so far, but incomplete reports at this critical stage in Elio's testing are grounds for me to terminate your contract.โ
You clenched your jaw until your teeth throbbed, your head going up and down like it was on a hinge attached to your neck.
โPersonally, that's a hassle I'd rather not involve myself in.โ Kim confessed in a straighter posture, smiling tensely. โNow, I'll ask you again: Have there been any complications with interโโ
โThat's enough.โ Elio reached across your shoulder for the tablet, pointer finger hovering over a red button on the screen. โResearcher Kim, it's time for lunch. Goodbye.โ
He pushed the button, managing to catch a swift change in Kim's expression before the screen went black and reflected your shock back at you instead.
You watched him slide the tablet away to the opposite end of the counter space, unable to lift yourself out of this bizarre stupor just from how purely surreal what just happened was. And from the look of it, Researcher Kim hadn't anticipated that Elio was capable of doing something like that, either.
You just hoped it wouldn't cost you your contract.
โWhat have you been doing all this time?โ you asked, tilting your head back to welcome his lips gliding atop yours, a peck, at first, which gradually grew deeper and greedier. With some effort, you pulled back. โMm, c'mon, what were you doing?โ
โOn Wendy Carmichael Can Cook today, she saidโโ
A hiss of annoyance. โOh, of courseโฆโ
โShe said there was a list of excellent bistros around Retro City worth trying.โ He wasn't pleading with you or anything, but he seemed just about as dedicated to this idea as he had been with the duck ร lโorange a while back. โFor lunch, I thought it'd be of interest to you to visit one. I've been researching ones I thought you would like based off of your dietary habits, allergies, and sensitivities. Radiant Bistro next to the Leviathan Archway near downtown might be a good option. Impressively diverse menu.โ
You pretended to pinch lint off of his shirt and inspect it up close. โIf you didn't want to cook, you could've just said that.โ
โThat's not it,โ he assured you with a kiss to the back of your hand so that you understood he meant it. โSince my arrival here, your social presence has declined substantially, which will not fare well for your public profile. I do understand that itโs in relation to your work as an auditor, butโโ
โOkay! Okay, I get it.โ you said agreeably, hands raised, hoping it'd deflect anything else. โWeโll go. Let me just find a hat so the sun won't get on my face.โ
โNo problem.โ He walked away and came back with an old unbranded brown one from somewhere in the most remote crevice of the apartment. โWill this suffice?โ
You looked at it, amazed. โYeah. Yup. Let's go.โ
Elio had stopped carrying a coat with him once the evenings grew long, and the remnants of heat from the day floated into nighttime, trapping the city within a muggy gray haze that too closely resembled dewy fog in early spring. The difference was the heaviness and breathability of the airโone you could tolerate despite allergies; the other was deplorable and evoked memories of every single club you had drunk and danced in with Melby and Chima and the rest in the past years.
Outside, right now, sucking in the early-afternoon heat into your lungs after spending your morning in air conditioning, nose wrapped in earthy white wisps rising from a coffee mug, you wanted to turn back around and hide. Much to your dismay, Elio kept you on a short leash with a tight grip on your hand, probably expecting you to have a change of heart.
ย โWould you like for me to recall the menu and read it aloud to you?โ he offered, situating his hand so his fingers crossed through yours, palms flush together. โThey have fourteen types of sandwichesโhot and cold. Five of those are chicken, and five are of different meat varieties: lamb, cow, veal, goat, and yak, all claimed to be bred and raised and slaughtered in their warehouses. The last four sandwiches areโฆโ
You listened passively without much commitment, especially in the back of the cab where there was no escape from anything. The AC was broken. The cabbie kept wiping sweat off his brow and sipped warm water. With the windows down, the outside air ripped inside the vehicle, nearly stealing the old hat off your head.
Elio went on to list desserts, thumb gently rolling circles on your sticky skin as if meant to keep you soothed.
โAs long as I remember to eat lightโฆโ you murmured, remembering, glumly to yourself.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Clamors was inside a three-story building on the north end of Retro City, about a ten-minute taxi ride to Motherโs brick-stone house, thirty minutes from Henriettaโs, forty minutes from your apartment, and farthest removed from the slums where congregations of profile delinquents and the unwanted were most dense.
Here in this part of the city, you were an imposter among manicured foliage, men and women and androids arrayed in trendy designer silhouettes that were protruding, sharp, and agonizing; sharks and whales of big business puffed cigars in front panoramic views of the cityscape from the highest skyscrapers. They could look down at the street from their window and see you, an ant scuttling meaninglessly.
This wasn't a place where you belonged, a feeling that never changed over time, even years later after Chima recruited you into his group and every night was a suffocating blur of sweaty, faceless bodies, explosive music, stomping feet, raspy screams, and lightly-flavored chalk dissolving under your tongue. You roamed the sidewalks at two in the morning as everyone had been kicked out, but no one cared because Chima came from money, a rare case where two parents could be accounted for, and you'd all just be back inside the next evening.
You weren't sure when you had become disillusioned with it allโthe drinks, the animal pills, which coalesced into saliva in your mouth, the noises, the gossip, the six ibuprofen to function behind a desk at work, the burnout of rinse and repeat, a conveyor belt that moved cyclically without a place to get off. To exit the ride meant to plunge head-first into abject terror, the unknowable, to become part of the yellow wallpaper that's never actually seen, to cease to be.
Being back in Clamors again after months away turned your heart against you, thrust the sound of its distress into your ears, dwarfing an animated conversation happening right at your circular table. You felt the music vibrate through your skin, make its way into your marrow, and rattle your entire skeleton.
Melby had a hand on your knee, blunt-tipped nails collecting sweat off your skin underneath them.
You couldn't really focus on that.
โSo, this is Elio. He's hot.โ Chima said without looking at you.
โReally hot!โ
โSo hot!โ
โDid you hear? Shut up, stop talking! Did you hear? That slut got herself pregnant!โ shouted Niva, a senior-most part of the circle behind you and Melby. She knew everything about everyone, though she wasn't supposed to keep tabs. โApparently her baby daddy decided the pussy wasn't worth it anymore and ran!โ
โI can't believe it. That'd mean someone was actually willing to sleep with her.โ said Niquan Lamos, the fashionable one always gravitating toward pastels. โA man, at that. Disgusting.โ
Everyone laughed, including you. Elio quietly observed it all, seated at your side, incapable of letting his polite smile slip with numerous prowling eyes on him.
โHave you fucked him yet?โ Chima asked you without actually caring for a response.
โOh, have you fucked him?โ
โC'mon, don't hide it. How was it?โ
โWhat was her name?โ asked a newcomer in the group, fresh out of secondary school and not even twenty. He was a compact lad, both in size and from being squeezed between Chima and Niquan in the circular booth stretched in fuchsia leather, or at least, that's how it looked in your tableโs corner of the club. โHow come she isn't here anymore?โ
First rule was: Never talk about things that could make the liquor go down harder. This was one of those things. Secondly, never ask questions about people who the group was no longer associated with. It just sounded ugly to acknowledge the rejects.
Tonight, however, was an exception because Elio's presence was an exciting change. They forgot how to behave.
โHm, now that you mention it, I don't remember. How long has it been?โ Chima said this absently, abysmally black eyes wholly captivated by the android. โDamn. Something like Mi-dan? Mi-an? Miโฆ Miโฆโ
โHer name was Mi-sun.โ said a nobody from somewhere at the round table. It probably would've been easy to figure out who was talking if they were more important, but it took less effort to blame the music reverberating from the speakers mounted on the wall near their heads.
Melbyโs hand traveled adventurously along your thigh, unmindful of how close she came to your crotch. You had a harder time ignoring that move and sipped busily from your jungle bird, holding it higher than your eyeline to admire its beautiful vermilion hue practically glowing against the strobe lights pulsing down from the ceiling.
โThis is the first time I've seen you drink.โ Elio was leaned into you, wise to the fact that you wouldn't hear him any other way. His lips nearly touched your ear, voice honeyed, caring, all for you. You were halfway through your second jungle bird. โPlease don't overdo it. The adverse effects of overconsumption of alcohol will cause you great discomfort tomโโ
โThank you, Elio.โ For just a moment, you wondered how irreversibly damaging it would be to just grab his hand and sprint out of there. You drank some more to weaken your resolve, add lead into your legs. โI'll be good if you be good.โ
Elio nodded appreciatively.
โWhy was Mi-sun kicked out?โ again asked the new face from before, plain and boyish-looking, Chima's fresh catch. They just kept getting younger and the alcohol just kept tasting worse. You forced it all down, anyway. โWell? Well? Well?โ
โShe was talking crazy shit,โ Melby piped up with a drawl, fingernail swirling around a dark purple bruise on your thigh. She pushed in hard enough to remind you that it was still sore. โLike, she was fine one week and then every single night after that she would nooooot shut up about some wild government conspiracy theories.โ
โOh, right.โ Chima laughed while forcing everybody out of their seats so he could stand. โI remember now. Yeah, she went completely insane. I think she was talking about androids being used for population control or something. Weird. Hey, let's dance.โ
โThat was a year ago?โ Niva wanted Chima to confirm. โA year, right?โ
โOver a year now. Who cares?โ Melby said, staying put beside you while the rest of the booth vacated. โSheโll just end up dead in the slums like all the rest. Uh, they do all die, right?โ
โWho cares?โ Chima echoed, nesting his shoulders high to his ears in a shrug before walking away. โWho has the animal crackers?โ
โSounds about right.โ Niva was unconvinced, doubt lingering in her words until Chima came around to rummage her purse for pills. โOh! Only take one, they're so expensive!โ
Chima stuck three in his mouth. โDonโt kill the vibe.โ He left without a glance back toward all the no-face, nameless nobodies willing to lick the underside of his shoes if it meant they'd be acknowledged and given featuresโeyes, lips, hair, an identity.
Niquan was satisfied with just one, offering a subtle wash of relief to Niva, who was just about depleted of her supply at that point and used the last of it for herself, tongue lapping at the inside of her plastic envelope.
You were almost finished with your jungle bird, contemplating a third even though you had entered the territory where one more could mean the difference between a happy buzz and splintering headaches tomorrow, just as Elio warned. The ice cubes had melted into a smooth watercolor appearance and turned from red to blue to green to purple to pink as the lights gushed down from above.
โI don't remember what she looks like.โ you admitted to Melby who gazed into you, squeezing your thigh meaningfully. Again, you didn't pay attention. โMi-sun, I mean. Were we friends? Did I ever drink with her? Have I ever slept over at her house?โ
โNo!โ Melby snapped, affronted. โYou're mistaking her for me. You guys never even had a conversation. You hated her guts. You thought she was a freak.โ
You made a sound into the last of your drink, unsure whether she was lying to you or not. โMaybe. Maybe. Was I okay with her being kicked out?โ
โTotally.โ she said, casting a fleeting look of disdain toward Elio, lip curling at one side. โChima only counted yours and mine and Nivaโs votes since we've been here the longest.โ
โThat'sโฆโ You licked your lips and then the rim of your glass, secretly wishing your tongue would snag an uneven crack so youโd start to bleed. โWhy don't I remember anything?โ
Melby giggled. โBecause you've been drinking, babe. It'll come back to you. What animal cracker do you want tonight? Giraffe or cat?โ
โHm?โ You were elsewhere.
Until now, you had gone numb to your surroundings thanks to the licorice notes of black strap rum and bitter Campari and pucker of pineapple juice that made for a mostly pleasant experience in your throat.
You were present in that moment, venturing a look around at the dance floor crammed with bodies (human and android) moving in rhythm to the music, in time with each other to create a oneness, a synchronism so strange that it put the hairs on the back of the neck on end like spines.
Why did it all look so different now? So alien? As if you were seeing an image from your nightmares in real life.
Elio failed to convince you not to have another drink brought to the table after all, meanwhile Melby said she was disappointed you didn't get something stronger, claiming you used to do it all the time.
That's right. You did, didn't you?
โHey.โ Chima had emerged from the shapeless cluster of sweating, drunk, wriggling bodies a short while later. He reached into the booth, gathering a fistful of Elio's button-up shirt, and looked at you with a malicious gleam, possibly just your imagination, that just dared you to protest. โI know you don't mind if I borrow him for a while, right? Of course not. The rest of us are curious about him. Weโll be gentle.โ
You wouldโve believed someone if they said your tongue was cut out, because as much as you wanted to slice into him and spit poison in his wounds with your words, rub it raw, deep into the bone, nothing came up.
Not a breath nor a feeble sob.
Don't touch him. Nothing.
โSo, you're chill with it?โ Chima, beautiful Chima with deep-dark skin sparkling in rhinestones and spray-on glitter as though he were a vessel for all the stars in the cosmos, bared his straight, white teeth at you in the form of an affable grin.
Eat shit. Bitter silence.
He asked you the same thing again but grew bored and gave up on expecting you to do anything interesting. Elio was led away by the front of his shirt to the amalgamation of bodies like a sacrifice for the great black maw belonging to an abomination.
A few broke away from the core. Niva and Niquan were identifiable since you'd known them longer. The rest were unfamiliar to youโthe no names and the tiny young man, the android bartender, the disc jockey, the bodies climbing over each other and melting back into a single incoherent mass.
They all looked exactly the same.
โI wanna dance too, let's go!โ Melby struggled with one of your arms while attempting to scoot her way out of the booth, but the alcohol and broodiness made your body into a stump, sturdy and immobile, roots bursting through the bottoms of your shoes and the shiny floor.
She plopped back down. โSeriously? What's up with you?โ
โIt's too hot,โ you reasoned, sticking a fingernail into the fresh glass in front of you, swishing the liquid around to make everything a more palatable blend. โIf you want to dance, I'm not stopping you.โ
โYou're acting so weird.โ Melby said, lost somewhere between frustration and astonishment while pulling a clear baggy from her pants pocket. A couple small pills moved inside, pink residue clouding the plastic. She plucked out one without looking. โHey, open up. You're being a huge snoozefest. This'll loosen you up.โ
When you felt her acrylic fingernails press against the corner of your lips, you gently pushed her hand back and nursed your drink some more. โNo thanks.โ
Melbyโs tongue lashed against her gums, sharp and disapproving. โWhy are you being such a fucking buzzkill tonight?โ She traced your line of sight to Elio, to the others grabbing and fondling him, to his eyes looking right back at you. โWe haven't seen each other in months. Now all you do is stare at that android.โ
โIt's my job, Melby.โ You took the damp paper napkin from under your drink to dab your forehead at the sweat, trying to cool yourself. โI can't help that.โ
โYou can take one night away from your job.โ she decided, taking hold of your lower mandible with a claw and crammed the chalky pink pill through lips and teeth into the pocket underneath your tongue. โYou know the drill. Let it dissolve all the way. Stop making faces! It doesn't taste that bad.โ
You tried to jerk your head away, but her grip was surprisingly solid.
โMelby! What the hell?!โ It came out garbled around her fingers still resting in your mouth, filling the reservoir below your tongue with saliva.
Melby, blue-eyed and blonde with pale pink skin that always reddened in the electrifying, hot air in the club, was completely flushed from her face down to her chest. Her eyes had darkened upon withdrawing her two fingers, glossing your lips with spittle.
โI missed you.โ she said, outlining the shape of your mouth until the skin started to tingle. โDid you miss me? I've been really lonely.โ
Your least favorite part of taking an animal cracker was the aftertaste that was the equivalent of eating sidewalk chalk and rubbing alcohol with a whisper of strawberry wafting up into your nostrils, clinging to every permeable membrane in your mouth and making your cheeks tremble.
โIโyeah. Yeah, I missed you.โ You tried to sink the lingering taste down your throat with a swish and swallow from the jungle bird. โI didn't know what I was getting into with this whole Hyperion gig. I feel like I'm constantly watching Elio. Twenty-four seven.โ
Elio never lost track of you throughout the ordeal, his being unable to escape the hands on his body and fight against the programming in his brain meant exclusively for human satisfaction. There were moments where you saw each other clearly, empty windows between writhing bodies, and you were convinced he tried to convey a very human-like discomfort that you immediately pretended like you hadn't seen.
Interfering meant going against the group. There was nothing you could do about it except allow them to eviscerate Elio if that's what they wanted. You could only sit there, drowning in rum and pineapple and aperitif and demerara sugar and scorching strobe lights and music bashing your skull and Melby unfastening buttons on your pants, but for some reason, that didn't quite register as what it was to you.
โAre you coming home with me tonight?โ Melby asked so sweetly that it made your heart flutter, or maybe that was the pill taking effect. โWe always have fun together. I've really missed it. It isn't the same without you.โ
โWhatโโ You almost tipped the red cocktail while reaching over it for a water glass that no one had touched. You slugged half in one go. โWait. What are you even saying? I gotta take care of Elio.โ
โOh my god,โ she seethed, taking her hand out of your pants to wipe her fingers on the napkin you used earlier. โJust tell him to leave. He has to listen to you. Heโll be okay.โ
Fuzz had started to collect in your head, filling the entire dome with a warm, soft feeling that spread like a rapidly-growing fungus down the brainstem, coiled around your spine, stuffed your jaws with cotton, sucked all the moisture from your throat, widened your chest with stuff, and ignited kindling that had been sitting in the bottom of your stomach.
Just now, the deafening tone of music had been reduced to a throbbing bass that jarred your bones and pulsed in your hands and feet. Your vision wasn't much different than it had been before, only now you seemed to move at lightning speed, people and shapes and lights all confused watercolor smears of you shifted too quickly.
โCan't.โ You recalled Melby had said something. โElio, first. Do you see him?โ
โNo.โ she said, watching Chima hook his fingers through the belt loops on Elioโs pants, knocking their pelvises together in time with the music. โCome on, I'll call a cab and we can go home. Weโll have a good time away from everyone.โ
You made a grab for the water glass again, throat the driest it had ever been. A mistimed gasp came out when the rim of the glass struck your teeth, missing your mouth almost completely. Luckily, only a little water got on your shirt, molding it to your chest like a cold second skin.
โGod, that's good,โ you moaned, draining the rest of it. โWhat are you even talking about? A good time?โ
She eyed you uneasily. โWhat do you mean? What do you remember when you're with me?โ
โPfft,โ you scoffed, stealing yet another water glass you managed to grapple with two hands so it'd stop swaying. โWhat do you mean, what do I mean? I hit the pillow and I'm out. Why?โ
After a few long swigs of ice water, the dance floor was less a mangled disarray of smoke and neon colors, more definitive and jaggedโthe stage, the speakers, the turntable where the disc jockey played. Even the beastly blob of grinding, convulsing people started looking like people.
Melby had lost all the red in her face, eyes riveted to the half-empty jungle juice in front of you, perhaps counting the beads of condensation dripping from its tall form.
โYou're usually really talkative. I think you're lying to me right now to get out of it.โ
โHuh?โ You were done with the second water, staring at her unfocused but suspicious. โLying about what?โ
โIโโ Melby withered in her seat, distracted by something ahead that you couldn't see, a bejeweled nail wedged between her teeth. โNo, nothing. Never mind.โ
โWhatever,โ you murmured. โI'm outta here.โ
Melby didn't stop you from leaving behind money for your drinks before you stumbled away from the booth toward the dancefloor, evading bodies that came flying toward you with erratic, jerky movements not at all matching the pounding beat coming from the stage.
The floor was actually hundreds of individually tinted blocks of plexiglass with colored bulbs screwed in underneath.
During the day, Clamors kept it covered with a special protectant and tarp to maintain the integrity of the glass, but at night, it was illuminated like a nonsensical rainbow checkerboard. Each square took on a life of its own, flickering in unison with songs played throughout the night, warping into mandalas and spirals and disorienting waves that most people using animal crackers couldnโt stomach for long.
You were close to vomiting up the jungle birds and your meager lunch from Radiant Bistro that afternoon when you found Elio within the swarm of partiers that reeked of sour body odor and stale alcohol.
He stood amid it all with a stiff spine, the loveliness of his face covered by shadows and terrible bursts of light that heightened his vacuous stare into the faces of those touching him.
The only other time you had seen him so devoid of life was in the presence of Researcher Kim. Now, he looked in such a way at Chima, at Niva, at Niquanโthe nameless and the boy were too scared of overstepping to have a part in it yet straggled nearby to feel like they meant something.
Elio saw you jostling through the crowd toward him, hardened amber regaining luminosity. You became the center of his world again with just a look, yet your world was entirely unthawed ice and serrated stalactites growing ever sharper, heavier, closer to piercing and crushing at a single point below them. The forest of brittle minerals in your mind needed just a single resounding event to loosen, to fall, to impale indiscriminately.
That moment finally happened as you approached Chima, his hand stroking Elio under every layer meant to keep him out. Your future was a far-off thing, light years away and completely untouchable, no matter how many times you were threatened with your profile, how you'd become nothing without your associations, how the entire world would cringe in disgust at your existence and leave you to rot.
You took Chima's hand out of Elioโs pants, hoping you had the strength in yours to twist his wrist so it hurt, wanting nothing more than to actually shatter the bone with just the pure hatred surging down into your grip. With the other hand, you drew it high behind your shoulder, muscles tense, bone popping from an unnatural angle, dense club air gushing between your fingers right before your palm released a thunderous crack against his cheek that shot up the length of your arm in stinging ripples.
โNo, stop!โ Elio tore you away too late, right after weakness reentered your body, and he was able to easily restrain you. โWhat have you done?โ
The clique had rallied around Chima, steadied him and examined the mark on his cheek, which was already blowing up in size.
He stared at you with amazement that quickly contorted into pure incandescence. His face was the ugliest thing you had ever seen, eyes an uninviting, pitless, and hollow place. This, you thought, was what he truly looked like beneath the popularity, cosmetics, money, and illusion of drugs.
โKeep your hands to yourself!โ you screamed.
โWhat the fuck is wrong with you?!โ He tried to lunge at you but was held back by Niva, Niquan, and various ghostly hands. โHow dare you. How dare you touch me, you sad sack of shit! You ungrateful nobody! I can ruin you! I can make sure you get thrown into the slums and your fucking insides get ate out by all those filthy savages.โ
โThat's better than this.โ You felt Elio tighten his arms around you, feet shuffling backward to try to separate you from this. Dancers were beginning to gather around the scene, both grossly fascinated and terrified because they'd never seen a fight between humans. โIt's better than the stupid drugs. It's better than this club. It's better than all your shitty little followers. Itโs better than you.โ
To this, Chima stared wide-eyed and gave a derisive laugh. โYou seriously hit me because I was touching the android? He's a fucking machine! What else is he useful for?!โ
You were still being coaxed out of the gathering, Elio's lips whispering pacifying words into your ear that you didn't hear.
โDon'tโDonโt talk about him like that.โ
Chimaโs visage relaxed into one you were used to seeing. A man who knew he had all the time and power in the world and that he could do anything with it. He swatted away all the helping hands and straightened his clothes.
โNot only are you fucking insane,โ he said, smiling without remorse. โNow, you're also dead.โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
The decision to retch into a convenience store trash can happened because you couldn't bring yourself to do it in the neatly barbered bush you had been closer to at the time. You had separated the metal lid from the metal body so you could simply lean over and spew into it freely.
Smells emanating from insideโexpedited food rottage from summer heat, curdled drinks, bagged-up dog shit, and God knows what elseโdid better to evacuate your stomach than the insane lighted floor in Clamors.
Most of what came up lacked the usual sourness, ran watery like a geyser of diluted red jungle bird with occasional chunks of undigested sandwich and probably everything from three days ago.
Elio wiped your face clean at every chance he got, those seldom moments where you could cough and catch your breath for just a few seconds before your stomach clenched and more climbed up your esophagus and exited your body. There wasn't much he could do apart from dab your skin and keep your clothes from the trajectory.
โWhy?โ Elio spoke sometime later once the waves of nausea had tapered to a degree where you could sit on a bench outside the convenience store and take a bottle of water he had ready for you. โWhy did you do it?โ
โBecauseโโ you said, not bothering to finish after swigging and swishing and spitting the acrid taste that lingered on your tongue, between your teeth, and in the ridges of your gums. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't get rid of it all. It stuck in your mouth like bitter tar. โBecause.โ
You went on to repeat the rinse and swish a few more times, ultimately tilting the bottle upside down to crush the cheap plastic in your fist so it gushed down on your head.
For a second, you imagined turning on a spigot to shock your scalp with cold water, flattening all your hair, pasting your clothes flush and translucent to your body like a second skin to peel away later.
The humid nighttime air was suddenly so much less oppressive than it had been. A subtle breeze had picked up throughout the course of the day, not doing much to tame the heat overall, but the fat pearls of water streaming down your back made you shiver. You counted all the drops that coalesced into shimmering beads on the tips of your hair, your eyelashes, and your nose and fell onto the pale gray cement underfoot.
Elio had already unbuttoned his shirt to the navel, just above where he had rebuckled his pants and tried to pull the rest of the fabric free.
โOh, Elio. Don't.โ
He pulled you into him despite your protest, swathing you from behind first with the shirt and then his arms as he held you against his chest. Fortunately, he had worn an airy undershirt so his body wasn't on display for anyone else, though there was no one around at this hour.
He soothed you with long strokes along your back. His touch amplified to a point where it hurt as much as it felt good. You knew what fingers he used more pressure with, where the heel of his hand touched you next. You could feel where he chose to linger and knead at knots under your skin, imagining the sensation similar to using a sharpened stone or ice pick
โI'm fucked.โ you mumbled sullenly in his embrace, warmth dissipated as you had soaked his undershirt all the way through. โI'm so fucked.โ
โIt was unwise, yes,โ he said in silken tones from atop your head, thin jaw pushed down into your wet hair, grinding and rotating when he'd speak. โI had you in my mind the entire time. I was prepared to let him do as he pleased if it meant preventing a confrontationโI failed. But, I hadn't expected you to hit him. None of the outcomes I calculated had that conclusion. I'm sorry.โ
โNo. I'm glad I did it.โ You worried that you were being overconfident, too hopeful toward a future unraveling at your feet as you spoke. โI couldnโt stand how everyone was staring at youโtouching you. Everything just felt so wrong, but, why? The only thing that was different was you being there, Elio. I saw youโyou looked so uncomfortable. I was so hot. I think I was seeing things after taking the animal cracker. I just got so angry.โ
Usually, Elio was the type to scavenge your history as thoroughly as he could, however minimal or inconsequential it all seemed to you at the time. It was a quintessential part of his programming as an androidโof all androidsโto want to dissect everything there was to know about their masters, knowing them better than their masters knew themselves.
You considered making it effortless for him, volunteering your past with animal crackers and how they used to not hurt at all. At one time, you could binge them for days without violent side effects thatโd plague a normal person for weeks.
โThere are no pharmacological benefits associated with their use,โ was what you heard him say in your head, firm yet loving, melting into his sensual strokes tracing parallel along the length of your spine. โProlonged use has been known to create perforations in the gastrointestinal tract, heart dysrhythmiasโฆโ
He didn't regurgitate that information at you. In fact, he said nothing at all. Besides the hand sweeping down your body steadily, lips and shapely nose burrowed in your limp seaweed-string hair, he didn't move at all. There was no stuttering heartbeat between you except your own. Even his breaths had gone still, chest straight down and unmoving.
Elio was a machine.
It was so easy to forget while wrapped up in daily mundanities. It wasn't so easy to forget in this moment where you wanted to crack him open, scoop out each precious piece of him with your bare hands, and hide yourself within his husk.
You were sick of the silence, so you pinched him hard under the arm, right next to the crease starting his shoulder. It made you feel better to do so, and he'd pay attention to youโ
He hissed and reeled away from your touch, startling you out of his arms because you didn't know how else to react.
โDid youโElio, did you feel that?โ you asked incredulously, voice whittling into a self-conscious mumble once you realized the words leaving your mouth. They didn't stop. โDid that hurt you?โ
The spot where you pinched was hard to see from the layer of his shirt sleeve, but his fingers rubbed there insistently like he were actually trying to alleviate pain.
โOnce, during my early development, Researcher Kim had told me he wanted to close the gap between what people think separates androids and humans.โ Elio explained, coming close again to touch you and dry your temples with his shirt on your back. โIt's unlikely that what you perceive as pain and what I am programmed to perceive as pain are absolutely comparable, but there's some common ground.โ
โI'm sorry, Elio. I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't know I could.โ Your voice weakened to a whisper, throat clenched in shame as your skin grew hot. It was like you were still stuck in the throbbing, stiff air of the club and not in the spacious nighttime breeze.
He looked you in the face, almost-orange eyes flitting inside their orbital sockets trying to find something distant and unknown in your expression. You guessed he was assessing your sincerityโnot for himself because he needed it, but to know how it took shape on you and bent your brows, molded your lips, dimpled your chin, deepened the lines.
Then he asked, "If I hadn't reactedโif my circuitry were less sensitive and I could feel nothing at all aside from your fingers on my skin, would you have done it again? Would you keep doing it?"
"What are you trying to say?โ
"Globally, since the widespread distribution of androids, the occurrence of domestic and public disputes has been halved. I have been designed to be non-violent, as have all of my predecessors.โ As if for effect, Elio took one of your hands and pushed your palm flat to his warm cheek. โI have no desire to hurt you, but I am also incapable of doing so.โ
You couldn't wrench yourself from his grip, so that's how you remained, caressing his soft, smooth skin while your thumbpad skirted along the round bone below his eye.
This was more than you could handle right now. All of the illness and nausea that came with the burdensome summer heat, the animal cracker, every bit of liquid and food to enter your stomach, the memory of slapping Chimaโit came back, crashing down like an avalanche carrying your regrets, fears, malaise.
โI'm not going to hit you.โ You were gagging around saliva pooling into the front of your mouth. โChima was different. He deserved it.โ
โPerhaps,โ Elio agreed, entwining fingers with the ones on his cheek. He kissed your open palm with great passion and some semblance of regret. โBut, I wish you would have hit me instead. I have failed one of the most basic parts of programming by putting you and others in harm. You may now end up suffering greatly because of it.โ
You did get sick again.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Elio had persistently warded off Researcher Kimโs video calls for three days while you recovered upstairs beneath every comforter you owned, maximum air conditioning, and heavy curtains to shun out all natural light from ever reaching your bedside. Time came and went without peril or concept to you, seeming to evaporate into the air like nothing, much like how your steady, quiet breaths did the same. They simply came and went; inhale and exhale, no writhing white plumes drifted overhead to prove they belonged to you or that you were even alive. Not in the dead of summer.
ย Five days total had passed before you could take the staircase down from the loft without Elio's assistance and eat or drink anything of substance that didn't end with it all being violently evacuated from your body.
Sleep remained elusive to you despite the sedatives and special hot tea recipes from online that Elio pushed down your throat. The migraines persisted even with prescription painkillers Melby had stolen for you forever ago and rough romps of sex that left you winded, glistening, and cold on the sheets when the oscillating fans blew air across your skin.
Whatever excuse Elio had fed to Researcher Kim over the days you were incapacitated worked because when you were finally back at the counter on a video call with him, he didn't ask you about it or chastise you much about the holes in your reports for that week.
โI see that Elio had been proving himself to be quite self-sufficient. I have here six separate occasions where he's ventured out on his own?โ Kim looped a stylus through his fingers fluidly, concentrating on what little information he could glean from your submissions. โHenrietta's, mostly. I see he's had to visit the dry cleaners. General store. Pharmacy. He's also been completing the six to ten interactions by himself. Absolutely phenomenal!โ
Your attention kept drifting away from Kim. It went to Elio, who placed a white mug down quietly next to you, the handle within reach of your fingers. Beyond the pale-gray wisps spiraling up into the air and dissipating among the snaking pipes sprawling the high ceiling, the liquid inside was pale yellow. Diluted green tea, maybe white tea, if you had to guess. They were among the few things you could stomach right now.
He offered you a fast smile, somewhat unlike himself, and leaned into your lips.
The sight went unnoticed by Kim, who was still captivated by the level of initiative and intelligence his creation displayed. Every word you managed to construct through sedative-induced delirium mesmerized him so thoroughly that he missed the groping hands under your shirt, the smothered moans, and the fact that you had exited view of the screen for fifteen minutes while being laid out on the couch and feasted on through an orgasm.
Wendy Carmichael Can Cook came on the television, a solid distraction for Elio. Todayโs episode was a rerun featuring some sort of elevated mush dinner popular in the slums. With some canned foods capable of surviving nuclear fallout, herbs you were almost positive had gone extinct forty years ago, and spices so rare they were untouchable, Wendy concocted something truly groundbreaking to the audienceโs eyes.
Elio looked only half-interested in the episode. Meanwhile, you went to the bathroom to clean yourself up and took three painkillers before sitting back down behind the counter. Researcher Kim had yet to lose the wind in his lungs, though now you weren't sure what he was talking about.
The tea was lukewarm and non-irritating just like you thought it'd be.
Your phone had survived the whole five days on a single charge as you had been too afraid to touch it, not because you were scared to see what was there but because you didn't want to know what was no longer there.
True to the fear, while holding a large breath you had sucked into your lungs, believing it to be the sturdiest barrier against whatever you'd discover, there was no one left in your phone logโexcept Melby.
The rest: Chima, Niva, Niquan, Marcos, Mother, and all the others who had once been listed there before like mock trophies to bolster your sense of worth, the swell of pride that came from knowing important people and integrating yourself into their lives to be something special, simply did not exist anymore.
You didn't have to search up your public profile to know that it was barren as well.
Once Chima went, everyone else went with himโboth from the circle and those you'd networked throughout life. Even if it had been someone else, the end result would've stayed the same, exactly as it is now.
โWhat do you want? I'm not supposed to be talking to you.โ Melby had answered her phone after six rings. The background seemed purposefully mute for your call. Perhaps she was just at home nursing the after-effects of things as well. โYou there?โ
Researcher Kim sieved through paperwork, now entranced by comparing Elio's earlier behaviors in the infancy of design to now. You lowered the volume to where his voice was a low hum, like mumbling through a wall you flattened yourself to.
โLet me guess, Chima told you that?โ you said, sipping gingerly from your mug. โHow much did he tell you? Was he actually honest, or did he just tell you I was fucking crazy?โ
โYou weren't acting right all night.โ Melby countered in her surefooted drawl. โI don't understand what's happening to you, or why you've been acting so differently. You shouldn't have hit Chima.โ
โHe shouldn't have touched Elio.โ
You could imagine her temper flaring, fair skin glowing pink in the face and chest as she kicked around the comforters on her bed. She strangled a sound in her throat that emanated through the phone as a low groan. Strands of her fried blonde hair scuffed together like pieces of straw when she scratched her head. It was unmistakable.
โWhat is going on with you?โ she demanded, on the verge of tears, voice fading out in glimpses like she was moving away from the speaker. โElioโheโs just an android. I know he's some radical new innovation, but he'll be saturating the market in six months like every other Hyperion android. There's always going to be more of him. Chima, though, he's actually human. You can just throw away an android.โ
Emotions asideโMelby wasn't wrong.
The price of innovation always meant leaving something behind. Whether or not you wanted to see it, if Elio passed his testing period, he'd be decommissioned in a metal box down in the basement at Hyperion while copies and variations of him were added to the heaps of scrap in landfill once the next model came out.
Melby then said something else, โI don't think this is about the android.โ
โOh?โ you said, passing a glance along toward the tablet to see that Kim still had his nose pointed down. โMaybe you're right. You know me so well.โ
โDo you want to know what I think?โ Melby asked.
You observed while Elio roamed the apartment, crouching to pick up the odds and ends that had gone neglected over the days you'd been bedridden, and he had stayed with you to keep you company. He tossed soiled clothes into a hamper, crumbled medication wrappers into the trash, and took your cold tea away to prepare more.
Inspired by your silence, mistaking it as timid submission, Melby went on. โI know you must think we're just being shepherded along, just doing whatever we're told because we don't know what else to do other than follow the loudest voice in the crowd.โ
โYou know me so well.โ
โI know you blame everyone else for what happened at Clamors, but you put yourself in that situation.โ Melby said, interjecting in a pitch higher when she heard you take in a breath, โAht! Aht! I'm not done! No one else is gonna talk to you now, so I'll tell you what we're all thinking: Our circle? We're special. If we always smile and talk about the same things and agree about the same things, we stay together. We stay safe. You've never really wanted to do that, it was always noticeable. I think that's why you and Mi-sun always got along, because you two just did things to fit in, not because you actually cared or wanted to be a part of it.
โI didn't lose you, right? Chima always talked about ways of getting you out of the group. He didn't think you were trustworthy. I guess he was right because you slapped him. Do you know how weird is it for humans to do that nowadays? Apparently it used to be super common to beat up your wives and kids, but now people just do it to androids. But, it's better that way, right?โ
โI don't know.โ You really didn't.
Elio came back around with a steeping tea bag and a second mug half-full of something darker yellow, like urine. You took the handle to give it a whiff (it smelled homey and savory). Meanwhile, he took away the tablet and ended the video call without a word to Researcher Kim. The energy wasn't there for you to reprimand him nor to mess up your face in mostly feigned surprise.
โIt's chicken broth.โ He was able to say freely despite Melby blathering on. โGive it a try and let me know if it's too strong. We need to start reintroducing foods back into your diet.โ
You drank from the tea mug instead, swiveling the barstool so your back faced him.
โI've thought about it some, and I think we're terrified of each other. Humans don't know how to truly trust one another anymore. Thatโs why we rely on androids for, like, everything.โ Melby continued, โI think, and this is just my opinion, that we actually really miss each other. I think we want to touch and hug and love each other. There are still some people who do. There's a market out there for human-human porn, so it's not like it's unbelievable, but we basically treat each other like we're extinct. It's weird.
โI've done it before, y'know? I've kissed a man. I've kissed a woman. I've fucked both before. You and Iโno, never mind. It doesn't count. I've thought about kissing you so many times. I wanted to do a lot more than just that, too.โ
The corner seam of your thumbnail had started to bleed after you dug through old scabs and scar tissue built on top of it, your bodyโs valiant attempts to keep normalcy despite the mutilation that came back again and again. You watched brilliant carmine ooze from the wound, filling the crevices between your nail and skin, crawling upwards to your knuckle before Elio had stifled the area with a warm, damp rag.
Melby let out a long sigh. You envisioned she had just thrown aside a bunch of decorative cushions and flopped down in a chair, or had been pacing her bedroom and finally given up by throwing herself supine on the mattress.
โI'm going to miss you being there.โ she declared. โI thinkโI think you're the closest I've ever come to truly loving someone. At least, I think that's what you'd call it.โ
You held your thumb erect for Elio to wrap it in a neon-orange bandage with pink smiles. His lips pressed gently to the sore finger, making slow, wet work to the back of your hand and then the inside of your wrist to feel your pulse bounce against his mouth.
โI'm sorry.โ you said at last, putting as much sentiment into those sparse words as you could. A part of you meant it genuinely as an apology for causing her trouble, for her unrealized dreams and lust, for the world you both suffered in and would never know anything else. โMelby, I have one last favor to ask of you.โ
She hesitated, likely believing that doing more would get her expulsed from the circle. โJust one?โ
โJust one.โ You nodded at empty air. โI know either you or Niva have Mi-sunโs phone number. Can I have it?โ
Again, Melby stalled, though this time you figured it was out of confusion. โThatโs what you want? She might be dead somewhere in the slums, you know?โ
โNot if she's pregnant.โ you countered. โNiva seemed pretty convinced that night that she was alive and well after being knocked up.โ
Melby sucked on her teeth, a moist, popping sound into the speaker. โNiva says a lot of stupid shit because she likes to hijack conversations. Fine. Whatever. I'll text it to you, but you only have one minute because then I'm blocking you for good.โ
To this, your heart actually stirred and squeezed, tightening so much it stole your breath from your lungs. Your entire chest felt like it shriveled into itself three sizes smaller as though to accommodate you fitting into a ball within yourself. Dread had opened a chasm wide in your stomach. Everything inside that gory cavity was swallowed up, leaving it vacant and hollow.
This was what it was like to mourn, you considered. It wasn't the same thing you felt the night you cried in the streets after fighting with Mother and losing Marcos. It wasn't the same as the last five days being wrapped in agony, lamenting the loss of a group you'd given years of your life to appeasing.
It was knowing that once Melby was gone, you were lost in the dark, and there was no way out of it. People with delinquent profiles didn't get redeemedโWendy Carmichael lied and had never lived a life in the slums, a truth Elio had been disappointed to learnโthey died in anonymity and poverty.
A notification came through just then, showing an eight-digit number presumed to belong to Mi-sun. You copied it quickly, although now your fingers felt numb and the person writing them down couldn't possibly have been youโ
โAlright. It's done,โ Melby said calmly. โI have to go. Will you be okay? Do you think people actually die when they go to the slums? I don't wantโโ
โGoodbye, Melby.โ You ended the call and threw your phone on the countertop, far from your eyes so you wouldn't know the exact moment the world ended.
โAnd, fuck you.โ
Elio had the sense to give you plenty of space after the ordeal and stayed busy downstairs cleaning the apartment while you tossed and turned in bed, legs knotted up in the sheets because nothing helped get you comfortable. At some point, through the thick of your adrenaline and despair, the buzz in your brain softened, and you were able to sleep until Elio joined you some hours later.
It was after midnight, and darkness pervaded everywhere. Above you, the snake pipes on the high ceiling writhed together in their intricate web just like every night, and you wondered why the wall of darkness hanging over you seemed closer than it usually did. Meanwhile, Elio faced you from his side of the bed and laid gentle strokes to the top of your head.
โIโve reached the conclusion that I am defective.โ Elio said tonelessly, startling you into such wakefulness that you sat upright from the sheets. โYou've lost your friends because of me, and now your profile has fallen into delinquency. The inclination to ostracize what deviates from adapted, accepted social behaviors aligns with common survival tactics. This is an explanation that I understand, but it doesn't... sit right.โ
Putting the blame on Elio to feel better would've been easy, and he would take it with grace and lay decadent caresses on your body as proof you were right. But he was too virtuous, and you secretly wanted to keep the credit of being the reason why Chima looked ugly and seethed into his cocktails.
โIt sort of hurts,โ you admitted. โIt's a dull ache inside my bones. It makes me feel like everything inside my chest is shriveling up like a prune. Being abandonedโfeeling lonelyโis like always being cold. Thinking of it now, I don't know if there was ever a time I didn't feel cold around them. How shitty is it that I feel a little relieved?"
โIf that's the caseโโ Elio rose up from his side of the bed, nudged apart your legs and settled between them. Most of his weight was still on his arms next to your head. In the waning moonlight, shadows deepened the lines around his mouth when he smiled. โI'm glad to have played some part in that release.โ
Your fingertips walked lightly across his cheeks, along the planes of his face, as though marveling at him all over for the first time again. His skin always was most beautiful bathed in warm light, but the soft, silvery veil filtering in through the windows gave him ethereal grace.
The calm air upstairs shifted as your bodies stirred on the mattress, sheets strewn to the floor along with pieces of clothing that left you bare to the gray air while Elio gathered the skin of your hips in his hands and sucked on you.
It didn't matter if you closed your eyes or studied the movement on the ceiling while he devoured, lapped away the sticky stuff that glistened out of you like the silk of a spiderโs thread before it could stain the sheets, because it always ended with the same kaleidoscopic bursts of color, wanton cries, and him chasing after another orgasm and then another.
He'd ravish you until puffs of hot breath hurt, and the tip of his tongue delivering a single stroke was enough to make you flinch and whimper. Your legs felt fatigued and trembled violently throughout the continued ministrations until you needed to beg him to stop, dignifying the demand with a hard yank to the thick hair on his scalp.
โI'm not done just yet, give me a moment.โ He told you the same thing tonight as he did every other time. The pain in his head subsided as he dove back between your legs and laid his tongue as a paddle against you, cleaning the cum for as long as it took for him to be satisfied.
He came up so you could have a taste of yourself in his kiss, tongues wrapped together while he fisted his cock stiff and lubricated himself with the fluid from the tip. You moaned against his mouth when two fingers pushed inside you and thrust with an effortless glide and instilled so much confidence in him that he slid in a third to the knuckle.
โMm, Elio, fuck me.โ you managed between wet, sloppy kisses and splintered breaths. Three fingers were a tighter fit and wider than he was, but the way he angled them up into you was mind-numbing, could've made your tongue wag out of your mouth while panting like a pheromone-crazed animal.
Elioโs lips went from your face to your neck, down along the slope to your shoulder before he removed his fingers and slathered that narrow space in your legs with spend.
โOf course.โ He obeyed dutifully but turned you on your side and seated one of your legs high on his arm. โLet's try something different tonight.โ
The bulbous head of his cock glistened as it dragged across your groin, tapping those sore spots that made you twitch involuntarily with anticipation and staggered breaths. Elio concentrated on your face throughout it all, memorizing both those subtle and large changes that showed him what you liked the most.
You'd never believed that androids could be sexually adventurous in the same way that humans could, and perhaps that was the case despite the kinds of positions Elio put you in if you were willing. He would be conscientious of your mood beforehand and then adjust accordingly from there.
Some nights, it didn't go further than mouth-fucking you until you orgasmed to exhaustion. Other nights, when you were more pliable and especially affectionate, he'd rut his hips into your ass until you cried and the sheets were beyond saving.
Now, Elio observed you closely as the curve of his cock sank into you, sinew in his stomach clenching once he started thrusting.
At the start, your sounds were soft, and the rhythm made with his hips was one you had no trouble riding. You closed your eyes and focused on how that tilt in his cock pressed up against your walls and stroked all the right parts. His controlled pace unraveled after a while, thrusts turned mindless and greedy as the sting of slapping skin seemed to resonate all around.
You had bunched bits of pillow and bedspread in your fingers and drooled out onto the fabric because you couldn't close your mouth long enough between moans and gasps and lewd mutterings to stop it. You begged him to fuck you harder, deeper, and tear you open if thatโs what he wanted to do and would keep you in ecstacy.
Elio indulged your high as he was able, rolling you from your side to your stomach and mounted you again. He was able to touch you better this way, fondle the globes of your ass, the pouches of fat in your hips, stomach, and chest, all the while sucking dark bruises all along your spine and shoulders.
His mouth would sometimes linger next to your ears, wherein he imitated every bit of his human likeness and breathed on you. And then, he would poorly stifle moans that inspired you to think too deeply about the extent to which he could and could not feel.
โLook at me.โ Elio felt your walls tighten around his cock and wanted to stare you in the face through your orgasm. He put you on your back, thighs hiked high on his sturdy chest, so those final thrusts plowed deep and stole your screams. You writhed under him, eyes rolled up, bloodshot and pupiless, muscles drawn so tight that it felt as good as it did awful.
A surge of warmth leaked out onto the sheets as Elio took his half-hard cock from your body and let it soften the rest of the way in cold air. His hand roamed you with delicate, healing touches meant to beg forgiveness for how much you'd ache later on, and his lips were tender and slow against yours.
You kissed him back distractedly, unable to think of anything else but the stickiness between your legs and how you'd chosen to never notice it until now.
โWhat's wrong?โ he asked, still pressed up against your mouth. โAre you unsatisfied? My refractory period ends in a few minutes. I can do as much as you'd like until you feel fulfilled.โ
โMm-mn,โ you hummed, โthat's not it.โ
He didn't stun when you snagged your phone from the bedside table and turned on the backlight. You pointed it down at cloudy white globs drying on your crotch, a sight that you thought was vaguely familiar to you somehow. It struck you then that it was like a scene from a pornography or vulgar sketches some kid in secondary school got suspended for drawing.
Still, it couldn't have been possible.
โWhat is that?โ you asked with unacquainted timidity.
Elio grabbed a package of wipes left bedside and spaced your legs apart to clean the mess he had left on you. He took his time with long, intentional strokes to avoid your sensitive parts as best he could, soiling a good handful from the package before asking if you wanted a bath.
โAnswer me first,โ you said.
He rose from the bed with one more kiss and collected your clothes from the floor. They were draped nicely over his arm, whereas he stood there before you nude, enveloped by the moonโs blue luster.
At first glance, his smile seemed the same adoring kind that he always held for you, and yet it evoked some undeterminable sadness to well up in your chest and cling there.
โItโs the result of a body never truly being your own.โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Mi-sunโs house wasn't far from your apartment, as you recalled. It took a bit of investigative work online to track down her address (via Elio), mainly because it had been well over a year since you'd last needed to know it and the phone number Melby had given you was disconnected, but once you had the coordinates plugged into your phone, it was just one begrudging trek through sultry summertime air to reach her front door.
When you had finally made it to that point, however, eyes leveled down at a dirty, faded doormat that had seen plenty of seasons and wintery salt, you weren't sure how to proceed.
There wasn't any real reason why you were standing there now, yet you felt that you needed to be there anyway. Maybe it could be called seeking solidarity with someone who was enduring the same inevitable ending you were, or maybe the curiosity about her state of being was what won out dominantly. You couldn't be sure of your own motivationsโonly that you were there, and you needed her to know you were.
After three solid knocks with your knuckles, you let your hand fall and waited by scuffing the soles of your shoes on the coarse mat underfoot. It still had some springiness to it as you scrubbed. The front door was old and brown, having lost its elegant lacquer long ago. You remembered Mi-sun had mentioned a few times before that she had wanted to make the door cute with white paint and a frilly outdoor wreath but could never get around to it.
You guessed she never did.
โShould we knock again?โ Elio asked across your shoulder, the bulk of his frame casting a cooling shadow over your body. He had gone out to Henrietta's by himself the other day when you told him what you intended to do and bought supplies to make a cake and special plastic Tupperware meant to keep it from moving around.
The only explanation he had given you about an hour ago, after locking the apartment door and stepping out onto the sidewalk, hot enough in the midday sun to melt the bottoms of your shoes to the pavement while you walked, was that Mi-sun was an old friend, and it was a safe gift even for a pregnant woman.
You never found the courage to divulge just how involved you had been in her expulsion from Chima's circle, even though you knew it'd be impossible for him to think less of you from it.
A minute passed, and then so did two more before you realized that no one was coming to the door. While listening for movementโa television, a hissing stovetop, shuffling slippers on top of creaking floorboards, anything at all aside from stiff silence, you understood that it was unlikely anyone had lived there in quite a while.
โI don't know where else she could be.โ you said, now back at Elio's side, where he flicked away tiny splinters of old wood and shiny glaze that peeled off your damp skin like cut-up stickers. He moved the visor above your brow gently, adjusting the position of it to better shield your eyes, but seemed more to just want the proximity than anything else.
The longer he fiddled with thingsโyour hat, the flecks of things he missed on your ear, wrinkles in your t-shirtโthe more apparent it was to you that he was contemplating something else. You were trying hard not to do anything that would spur him into making the next suggestion you knew was coming.
โThere is one other place we haven't tried.โ he said, switching from your shoulder to tucking pieces of hair securely behind your ear and dabbing sweat off your neck with a handful of napkins he had picked up at a convenience store while grabbing you water. โThe likelihood of Mi-sunโs profile falling into delinquency and being able to maintain residence within the city is less than twenty percent. Howeverโโ
โI know.โ You breathed out hot air and sucked it right back into your lungs. Maybe if you did that enough times it'd burn them, shrivel them up like prunes. โI know where she is. Let's wait until it cools down to go, though. I'll probably pass out if I have to see any of that right now.โ
โToday on Loti Khanโs Food Tours of Retro City, she said that Asakawa on Fifteenth is a spot worth visiting during the summertime because of their cold noodle dishes. Hiyashi Chuka was what she suggested, I believe. I've already committed the menu to memory, and they have well over twenty different cold dishes and beverages. Their affordability isn't as stellar as Rainbow Bistro, but Loti saysโโ
Wendy Carmichael was now a disgraced name in your household after Elio had spent a few hours one afternoon researching the womanโs true life story. She had been born into the elite class with a mother sitting at the top of the food chain in Retro Cityโs governing body, attended culinary arts schools across the world yet never reached the acclaim she coveted until she made up the whole spiel about clawing her way out of the slums.
Crawling back from the slums once you were in them just wasn't feasible. Only the worst of the worstโthieves, profile delinquents, murderers, lepers, and unwanteds were kept there, like trash crowded and barred in a landfill. If you found yourself in the slums somehow, no one would help you out of them because that would mean tarnishing their own reputations.
You were as good as dead.
You were dead.
Elio had carried around a brown paper bag housing the cake for most of the day, never once setting it down. His features never flinched when the straw handles sank into parallel dents in his skin, long stripes that looked like they'd be sore to you, but he never conveyed any discomfort. He merely floated along wherever you went, undeterred by your dour, soulless wandering, which lasted until the sun emblazoned the sky in dim fire and pinks.
Those hues were leached by the close, calming gradient of greens, blues, and darker blues that reached so quickly you could follow the sprawl of them until they had ensnared the daylight. The sun sank somewhere betwixt skyscrapers, and the air still felt thick as the mucus in your throat but bearable.
That same sky followed you on the cab ride across the city. You imagined the darkening air rushing alongside the vehicle with you as if containing it on rails, guiding you closer towards the slums. Once the skyscrapers were gone, far away in a suffocating yellow haze from the sleepless city, and the residential zone had thinned out of the rest of its straggling homes, the scenery had taken on a complete shift.
Everything was bizarrely flat, barren, and beige for as far as the eye could seeโvegetation was withered roots and barbed, inedible shrubbery that could've been pretty with some flowers or leaves. No trees could endure the fissured, parched earth nor the fine dust and sand skittering in the wind, leaving heavy layers where it lay once the breeze ebbed. Animals were long gone; the rumors of their bleached bones and skulls warped in a perpetual rictus of agony had been true because you saw many scattered throughout the landscape.
โPlease confirm this is your stop,โ said the cabbie, a female android from an older generation, maybe three or four. She stuck her hand outside the driverโs window when you tried to give her a tip. With her fish-eyed stare and leathery smile, she repeated, โNo need. I have no use for money. Please confirm this is your stop.โ
โThis is correct.โ Elio spoke for you before taking your fingers through his and guiding you away from the idling vehicle. The android cabbie found his reply sufficient and drove away without questioning why you were out here in the flatlands. All she knew how to do was drive and obey traffic laws.
โDo you know where we're going?โ you asked because you only knew to have told the cabbie to drive as far as the outer perimeter of the city. Beyond this, your phone had no service, and there were no clearly designated signs to point you in the right direction.
The people in the slums were meant to be forgotten, hideous secrets hidden away, broomed off to the outskirts of civilization where they'd have to fend for themselves in an environment that had been deader than them for ages.
โTruthfullyโโElio stalled then and glanced around the endless expanse of wastelandโโHyperion never included information about the slums in my programming. What I know is common knowledge and what I've accumulated in my time with you. I have never been able to locate specific coordinates to where the slums are hidden.โ
You frowned. โShould we turn around before we get lost, then?โ
Elio told you no and raised the hand clasped with yours, pushing one finger erect at a faint glow somewhere in the distance, no more than a tenโor fifteen-minute walk. You were almost convinced you could see the silhouettes of shoddy, leaning structures, but there was no way to be certain unless you got closer.
โLet's go.โ
Chasing the remnants of the dusk to light your way across the starved, fractured terrain, those sparse shapes you had seen minutes before grew into multitudes. Soon, you were among clusters of disheveled, crude homes organized in long rows, some stacked with tiers like they were meant to replicate separate floors for more space.
Most of these houses didn't come with windows or doors to keep out strangers but thick decorative curtains that'd shun the beating sun, stave off the worst of winter frost, and deflect billows of sharp sand from dirtying their things indoors.
The paths between rows of homes were well-worn and brightly illuminated with anything they could useโlanterns, stuttering neon signage, solar panels, and even fire rings brutally hammered and dented into shape. Shadows from the fire lurched erratically against crooked metallic walls. Some homes with grimy windows caught a weak gleam off the flames.
It was almost fully dark, and people still moved with purpose as though they could compete with the suit-and-ties stomping their soles on the pavement in the city. Their hands were busy doing somethingโcarrying, brooming, cooking, flourishing during a great retelling, clapping, hiding smiles.
These savages, delinquents, fraudsters, thieves, murderers, and diseased swine never once regarded you or Elio with any modicum of intrigue. You had believed at some point you'd be shrinking under a crowd of wicked stares, pulled down into some inescapable abyss by necrotic or leprous hands trying to steal the clothes from your body or use your skin to tarp piles of scrap.
Only one man had stopped along the path, dressed in dusty clothes that were otherwise decently kept; he was thin but not malnourished and hollow in the face. He told you that the aimless way you and Elio had been walking gave away that you were new to the slums because there was always something needing done and not enough hours in a day to do them.
โMi-sun?โ The man was thinking aloud, stirring up dust as he shuffled his feet around. You had given him the name and a description, which you hoped had been specific enough to avoid approaching people at random. โYeah. That pregnant girlโฆ she was here for a while. She's long gone now.โ
โLong black hair, blunt bangs. Black eyes. Really translucent skin? Super skinny?โ As unhelpful as your details were, it was all you had to give him to keep the mental acrobatics going. There was always a slim chance he could be misremembering her. โAre you sure she's no longer here in the slums? Where'd she go? What happened to her?โ
Eventually, the thin man led Elio and you to a tiny houseโmore of a shackโmeant to accommodate a sole body and some odds and ends. He held a heavy curtain back for the pair of you to enter, encouraging you to settle down on a sandy rug, which looked to have at one time been bright red.
โI don't have much to give, but here's a little water. To have made it here, you would've had to walk. We all had to.โ he said, pulling out his finest cuppery and pouring from the spout of a broken electric kettle. โThat girl was a profile delinquent, to my understanding. Almost all of us here are. I used to own a printing business on the north side about fifteen years ago. I upset the wrong people and here I am. What's your story?โ
You spun the cup with your fingers, trying not to put your eyes down to scrutinize any particles floating around inside. Elio wasn't given a cup because the man had immediately deduced that he was an android.
โIโฆโ You still didn't drink, but the back of your throat felt scratchy and your tongue like some dry slab of meat shoved into your mouth. โI pissed off the wrong people.โ
โAh.โ The man gave an anguished smile, showing he understood you very well. There was a low table between you, repurposed from something else and sanded down to a smooth finish. โFor a while, I helped look after Mi-sun. Like you, I had been the first person to greet her when she arrived. She didn't act like everyone else; she was dazed, but she was angry.
โI fed her, gave her water, and gave her a sleeping bag. We have to make due with less than bare minimum most days, but we make it work. We all look out for each other. The community really pitched in when we realized she was pregnant.โ
Elio kept a watchful eye on your hands, the fingers aching to peel back ribbons of flesh.
โThat shouldn't have been possible.โ you said. โMi-sun had an android. She was never involved with any menโnot that I could ever recall. She just doesn't give me the impression of someone who'd change her ways like that.โ
The man sipped his sandy water, wiping off clear pebbles that had clung to his facial hair. โWhen you find yourself exiled here, you learn fast that things are never what they seem. You didn't ask a question, but you gave yourself an answer.โ
โWhat?โ It was more noise than a word.
โDaichi, I believe, was her android. Shortly before she showed up, she said that Hyperion had come to forcibly reclaim it. That must've been a difficult reality for her to faceโknowing everything was being taken away from her, forced into a pregnancy, and having to fend for herself afterwards.โ
This time, you lifted a hand to stop him from falling down another tangent. He obeyed, voice whittled to silence that was immediately unsettled by loud water slurping.
It wasn't that you weren't following what he was saying. You were many things: a fool, a sheep, a coward, a liar, maybe even a true scoundrel at heart, but stupid wasn't among that inexhaustible list. You just needed a moment to collect the nuggets he had thrown down for you to pick up.
Guilt peaked the ranks of everything else you felt right then. A word you'd never use to describe yourself was malicious, but in the end, it had been the malice of someone else and your inability to see apart from the rest that condemned Mi-sun to this suffering.
You played as much a part in taking away Mi-sun's life as Chima had in actually enforcing it. Unlike Chima, never one to balk or cower regardless of how truly cruel his decisions were and committed to them like gospel, you simply sat in his afterimage and did whatever he said. Half of the time, you were blitzed out of your mind; the other you spent wishing you had never known them at all.
It had been so easy to vote Mi-sun out of the group. Completely painless. You just didn't look at her when you raised your hand to pass judgment. Melby had expressed her delight by squeezing your thigh, whereas Mi-sun held her composure and shoulders straight back, but her face contorted with every indication of betrayal and agony.
You thought about how many animal crackers you had that night.
โWhat happened to her?โ Both your hands had been restrained by Elioโs at that point. Large, comforting, and warm in contrast to all the ice that seemed to thicken your blood, stiffen your heart, and freeze your bones. โWhere is she now?โ
The man must've been suspecting something because his face looked long to you now, weighed down by this life and your feeble state.
โIโI can't be absolutely positive, but I do believe she is dead.โ he told you grievously, beady brown eyes not unseeing to the way Elio groped your fingers to keep them still. โShe didn't want to be pregnant. It was something she talked about for weeks before leaving. She knew what Hyperion and the government were doing and said she didn't want to be a part of it. On the last night before she left, I had to wrestle a knife out of her hands because she was trying to cut open her stomach to kill the baby.โ
You couldn't swallow past the sharp granules of sand and dryness in your throat anymore. You had to slug back the cup of grainy water until the feeling subsided, shove the worst of the dread and shame and guilt into your bowels.
โAfter that, she was gone.โ He took a drink as well, exchanging looks from you to Elio. โA couple of us tried tying her up to get her to calm down and do something about the cut on her stomach, but she got the knife, stabbed one of the younger guys and got away. We haven't seen her since, but a search party did come back to say they saw blood leading back to the city.โ
โOh my godโฆโ you groaned, forcing Elio to recoil when you slapped his hands awayโintentional and hard. You stuck yours in your hair, yanking at the roots until your scalp screamed and burned. โIs there any chance she could've survived? Any at all?โ
The rail-thin man swirled what little remained of his water in the cup, studying the pale sediment floating within. โIt's too hard to say. It's unlikely, my friend. The police wouldn't have gunned her down if they saw she was pregnant, but they would've seen the cut. And that counts as attempted murder. If she's still alive, it's only to give birth, after thatโฆโ
โExecution,โ you finished.
He nodded and said nothing else, eyes downcast as though lost in the grain of the wood table.
After that, you left the man in his sad little shack to explore the slums more. Elio came along shortly after, saying he had presented the man with the cake as a reward for his hospitality and apologized if it no longer looked appetizing.
The man thanked him before returning to his grief for many things, perhaps.
โI don't want to be here anymore, Elio.โ you said, failing to avoid hearing a gaggle of giggling women gossiping together. They were dressed clumsily and in trends almost a decade old, but they had glowy eyes and cavernous lines worn into their faces from laughter and joy where they could find it.
Old men played some made-up board game together, gathering at least half a dozen spectators to see who'd win. Their brows were heavy with contemplation and stress of worthy competition. The other bodies tried making bets with pieces of scrap and metal coils and nearly blown bulbs for lighting.
Music came from all around, lyrical in the same way it was discordant because they weren't playing the same songs nor singing the same things. Their voices were robust and resilient, unwilling to be trudged over by sand nor heat nor oppressors who were incapable of understanding the human spirit was pliant and could bend with the wind, stand with the seasons, and could fracture yet never break.
You couldn't make sense of what any of them were singing, the noise too unharmonious, but you could feel the power in their songs pulse through you, ricocheting in your mind for long after you'd escaped proximity to them.
There were no lepers. There were the sick and unfortunate, but they were not diseased. They did not believe that their tilted houses were tombs, that their unquaint lives were an endless spiral of torment, or that the food they could find and produce was unworthy of reverence.
The people of the slums lived a hard, thankless life, but they had each other. They banded together to weld sheets of metal into four walls and a roof for the new faces who came to them. Your woes would become their woes, and they would feed you, cloth you, wash you, bandage your wounds, and call you their most beloved.
Together, they ate their meals from what they could scavenge out there. They retold the same grandiose tales of heroes and valor and androids that Marcos had told you at bedtime as a child. Their cultures were all cherished and expressed in the food they shared and clothes they managed to sew together by hand and slow machines.
You could ask your neighbor for a tablespoon of sugar and four would come to you with curiosity and offer their arthritic hands and knobby backs for whatever was needed.
Here, you could see humanity clearly for the first time in your life and felt burdened knowing it. Your heart weighed like an anvil behind your ribs. It hurt and lurched behind its enclosure because it too wanted to get away from what it now knew.
โA lie.โ you choked, forcefully shoving Elio's hands away from you once again when he tried to embrace you. โIt was all a lie. Everything was a lie! Where are they?! Where are all the lepers and people leaking pus from their face?! Where are the murderers? Where are the savages? Where are all these awful fucking people I was told were here? Where are they?โ
Elio's expression took on something completely unforeseenโpity. Their lives were fine and routine while yours crumbled around you. The terror you had been force-fed your whole life was all false. There was civilization beyond a profile with red overlay, more waiting on the other side that the sleepless city wanted to conceal.
โThere are no androids here.โ Elio mentioned, deeming that adequate enough time had passed for you to regain your bearings. He took you in his arms and kissed the crown of your head, burying his lips deep in your hair. โWe were never meant to become substitutes for your love. We were never meant to go this far and act as replacements for humanity because we simply cannot feel what another human does. That is something Hyperion will never be able to achieve. Humanity needs humanity, not machines.โ
You sank into his warmth, arms wound his back, and said from his chest, โBut, I love you. Don't leave me. I don't want Hyperion to take you away.โ
Elio, your beautiful sun, leaned down into your face and kissed the highest parts of your cheeks and the wetness around your eyes before settling on your lips. Slow and lingering, you chose to believe it meant he was sealing away your plea and that he'd always be there to swathe you in his arms.
โLet's stay for a little longer,โ he said once apart from the kiss. โIโd like to see the side of humanity that no one else does.โ
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
Less than a week had passed since your hard slog through the slums and back to Retro City. Although you had only been gone from your inner-city apartment for mere hours, possibly five or six at most, upon walking back inside after Elio and wincing against the fluorescent bulbs overhead, you thought you were looking at something entirely foreign.
The simple pleasures that you had become accustomed to throughout your life: plumbing, central air that turned the hot sweat on the back of your neck into cold droplets slithering beneath your clothes, the worn out mattress upstairs, technology, an android who'd done almost everything for you for the better part of a yearโit all seemed so novel, so excessive. A treat for a rat in a box before testing to see how it'd respond when it was all taken from its enclosure.
So, when Elio woke you up one morning, early enough that the light streaming in through your windows already felt warm on the bed sheets, and the thin air looked itself to have a golden hue, you couldn't say you felt any rouse of surprise or fear when he handed over a red letterโan eviction correspondence.
Sooner or later, you knew you'd meet with one, though the progress of everything hadn't been as immediate as you had been led to believe it would be. A month had come by and stayed for several slow breakfasts, lunches, dinners, mindless strolls, and countless passionate entanglements before deciding to leave on an indignant note. With the red notice, you were expected to vacate the premises within days, whether you had intentions for your belongings or not.
Things stayed tumultuous from there on out, yet you couldn't find it within yourself to react to any of it, even in the instance when Researcher Kim rang you for an impromptu meeting that you anticipated meant no good.
โEffective immediately, Elio will be seized and returned to Hyperion in relation to the recent change in public profile status.โ It was too formal and rigid a tone even for him. Clearly, his superiors had demanded this because you doubted the profile change was much a concern to him on a personal level. โYour contract is hereby null and void, and your association with Hyperion is obsolete. Any attempt to thwart repossession of Hyperion property will be penalized legally.โ
Throughout it all, Elio swept the floor with leisurely strokes as though the reach of Researcher Kimโs voice ended at your ears alone. He moved onto laundry, taking great care to iron out the wrinkles in your favorite shirts and make the folds in the arm seams crisp and symmetrical.
โIs that really all you wanted to say?โ you asked, palm capped overtop a mug of tea Elio had set down for you a while ago. The steam now rose weakly and moistened your skin, a particularly gross feeling, but it kept you alert. โI thought that Elio was your project, and you called the shots on him.โ
Researcher Kim was out of sorts and worn. His posture was crumbled, and his clothes were in complete disarray like he hadn't bothered to change out of them in days. His under eyes were translucent, pulling out all the purples and blue veins under his skin. The man looked like he had hardly slept in weeks.
โYou don't understand what you've done, have you? Not only may you end up costing me my position, but you've ruined my entire lifetime of work!โ Kim leaned in close to the screen, sounding more and less himself now.
You were wary of the glint in his eyes. โWhat do you mean? Elio's justโโ
โNo!โ he shouted and slumped back into his ergonomic chair. His head slanted over, almost coming in contact with the peak of his shoulder like it was too heavy for his neck to hold. โYou don't get it. You don't get it! Because your profile turned, this entire yearโeverything youโve reported, everything I've accomplished, Elio's entire testing period is invalid. Hyperion executives consider him defective. The Generation Seven android has failed! Look at what you've done!โ
A sudden wild flapping of thousands of butterflies lifted your stomach up and then plunged it down into a void. Kim had successfully chiseled away the inexpressive mask you had worn up until that point, seeming satisfied that he could stipple your face in a cold sweat.
โWait, no. That can't be right.โ you protested, wrestling your own hands to keep them off of the tablet in front of you. โMy profile turned, but the work I've done has been honest. Elio is a success! You know that! You've seen every step of his progress for almost a year.โ
Researcher Kim threw his hands up wildly, truly not himself with all of these gestures. โNone of that matters. None of it. My life's work is a failure. I thought we had an agreement to help one another, but I was mistaken.โ
โYou don't understand!โ you said, pounding the countertop with sharp claps of your hands. โIt wasn't on purpose. I wasn't trying toโฆโ
โHyperion will have Elio destroyed, and progress will be hindered. Do you know how long, how many decades this could set us back? This could be devastating to humanity, but I don't think you're capable of understanding that. Just like the rest, you're not able to see the big picture at large, the mechanisms at work keeping our society moving forward. You can only see the straight line ahead of you and wearing blinders so you don't have to know the rest.
โWe've kept this world running for sixty years. You need to understand how utterly fucking frustrating it is that one person has the potential to undo decades of work!โ
Researcher Kimโs words weren't unjustified to you because he was a scientist, and you had always been a nobody in the grand scheme of things. But, right now, the venom he spat sounded vindictive, a man sucking on wounds you had inflicted rather than the opinion of the whole of Hyperion.
If you hadn't been staring directly at him this entire time, you wouldโve thought he was frothing and drooling at the mouth like some animal.
A stilted quiet filled the gaps in conversation, both of you uncertain of what would be said next. If he was reacting in any professional capacity, the call would've been disconnected by now. That was the main giveaway that let you know this wasn't just about what Hyperion wanted.
But the truth of it was that you didn't care what Hyperion wanted or him.
At the end of your life as you knew it, before being thrown away into the landfill with every other unwanted human, you were piecing together the whole history of the world and how it had gotten to this point. It had become this way through relentless men like Researcher Kim who mostly operated on their own moral compass, ones that could never quite point north and spun on that wheel as they saw fit.
โEnough of the powerplay, Kim.โ you ordered, chest opening toward the ceiling with a deep, bracing breath. โWhat is the real purpose of Hyperion? Why does it actually exist?โ
Kim, perhaps re-evaluating you as less of a pawn in this scheme and more of an infant intellectual about to breach the narrow canal into enlightenment, stacked his spine high and pressed his fingertips together. He studied you with some caution, head shifting from left to right, just slightly off-center from his hands as though judging whether you were worth divulging precious intel to.
But, like you, you expected he realized it didn't matter what he'd tell you, however coveted it might've been by Hyperion.
Kim, ultimately, worked for himself and for Hyperion only when he felt it served him well.
โWhen I hired you, I didnโt do it because I thought you were stupid.โ It seemed he felt the need to clarify this for you, unsmiling but with an eager lilt in his tone. โI hired you because of your potential. I took a chance on you, and while it had, indeed, ended in my peril, you've surprised me so many times throughout the year that I started keeping a record of you as well.
โHuman beings do one of two things in the consistent presence of androids, they either regress or they progress. Most of your peers will regress because thatโs how society has been modeled to be. The difficult tasks, the mundane, all the things that ask of us to consider the complexity of the world around us and think critically have been left to androids. How well do you think a machine can understand the theory of life after death and the mysticism of religion? The concept of soulmates? Cultural superstitions and children's nighttime fears? It's about as you expect. They can give you an answer without truly understanding. Androids, I dare say, only have an extremely limited understanding of moral culpability. Humans are much more flexible with it these days because it suits them best.
โSo.โ Kim sighed, hands resting on the dark red desk he sat behind. โYou can imagine how interesting it was when we started noticing a trend with auditorsโchanges in them. A renaissance, an evocation of deep wondering and wariness towards the workings of the world around them. We can only guess the reason that this happens is because part of humanity still doubts the intentions of androids, and that's been bred onward through the generations. You ask an android a question, they give an answer, you doubt that answer, and then you start to doubt everything around you. It's all hypothetical, but it makes sense.
โIt doesn't happen with the majority of the population, though. And it isn't encouraged. Enlightenment threatens the status quo, and those who disturb the status quo are a disservice to the governing bodies and Hyperion. Do you understand?โ
Your gaze turned cold. โAre the other auditors there in the slums, too? Once they've been used up and started to catch wind of this messed up shit?โ
Researcher Kim flicked his fingers toward the top of the screen, doing that instead of shrugging. โWho knows? What happens to them once a testing period has concluded is none of my business. Presumably so, that's what I would hope for them because that's the kindest outcome.โ
โWas Iโฆโ You licked your lips and felt the shallow cracks in them. โI was going to end up in the slums no matter what happened, wasn't I?โ
He frowned. โNo. If things had gone differently, I was going to vouch for you. I wanted to keep you as my assistant.โ He was quiet for a beat, looking straight at you in that discomforting way that you couldn't shake. โIโve grown fond of you, you know? How could I not with everything I've learned about you over the course of a year. I can't forgive you for what you've done to the Hyperion Project, to my life's work, but I can't just let you disappear like the rest.โ
Something ugly started to grip in the back of your throat. Fear? Disgust? An inkling?
โWhat do you mean?โ you ventured.
โI've read through each report you've sent me in the past year so many times. It was mostly out of necessity for Hyperion, of course, but the ones that I found myselfโฆ fixated on rereading time and time again were of yours and Elio's sexual endeavors. I wasn't lying when I said they were a contract-based requirement, mind you, but I will admit that some of the questions were altered somewhat.โ he said, suddenly smiling in a self-satisfied sort of manner that made your skin itch. โI realized I never answered your question fully, by the way. I can get ahead of myself sometimes, as you know. But, do I really need to explain what Hyperion's purpose is?โ
You were on the edge of your seat, ready to take flight off it at any second. It's just how the entire change of trajectory made you feel. Humanity had spent too much time in the past arguing animal-like, instinctual reactions for this not to be real.
In that moment, you were living proof of a prey noticing a predator in broad daylight.
ย โFine.โ He kept smiling around the taut creases in his skin. The muscles there twitched as if the effort were unfamiliar. โHyperion is a repopulation aid. It's quite sad, really. It started out with such great potential to drive society forward, but humanity and greed have always gone hand-in-hand. So, it became a race of mass production into a race that the governing bodies now had their hands in. The order was to rectify the critical birth decline worldwide. Androids became less like tools, looked less like machines, and more like humansโlike lovers who couldn't say no to any demand.
โAndroids are vessels for insemination. What else do you want me to tell you?โ
Researcher Kim's explanation had weakened you, made your legs shaky and light like a scarecrowโs stuffed with straw. You couldn't rely on them to carry your weight away from this awful conversation, the hideous sight of him, because there'd be nowhere for you to run to while the information perforated your brain and crawled inside and feasted there.
โElioโฆโ You didn't even know what you wanted to say. Everything got stuck behind the notch in your throat. None of it would assuage that wretched ache in your gut, the precursor of vomit and disgust and unhinged terror.
โOf course.โ Kim said, without needing to tell you what he was confirming. He was perfectly composed still, perhaps even shining with pride like some well-hidden, nuanced detail had finally been figured out.
He leaned toward the screen, smile turning salacious and voice low and grating.
โMy only regret is that I couldn't be there to do it myself.โ He brightened at the way your face wrenched and fastened in fear, seeming to think it was a reward after conducting an experiment on another project. โBut, there's still time, isn't there? I must retrieve Elio myself to shut him down. If you listen to what I ask, perhaps I can get you pardoned and your profile reinstated.โ
โNo. Thatโs not what I want.โ you said.
โIt doesn't matter what you want,โ he rebuffed, speaking with such confidence that you almost believed it. โThe moment your profile fell into delinquency, you ceased to be. You've fallen through the cracks, and no one is going to help you. You're less than an android.โ
The fine hairs all over your body bristled. โDon't compare me to a machine! You don't get to decide things for me!โ
โI can save you, you damn fool!โ Kim gaped incredulously. โI can restore your life and give you more than you've ever had. I can give you influential associations. I'll take care of you. I'll keep you as my assistant, and you get to live a life among the elite.โ
He was lying.
No one ever made it out of the slums once they were in it. That wasn't an assumption, it was a simple grim reality.
In this world, only humans could lie because androids were incapable of betraying their programming to do so. Otherwise, Elio probably would've lied about many things or had never said certain things at all to spare you discomfort.
Humans, on the other hand, could lie to maliciously deceive and serve themselves a better hand. They could lie their way into a false mirror image, something that looks like them but never really existed and could never truly be. They could lie their way into trust to fulfill their own desires, and once that had been sufficiently quenched, they could go on lying elsewhere.
โI'll be there for you soon.โ Researcher Kim tried his best at a soothing smile, treating it as though the sight of it would persuade your trust of him. โPlease have Elio on standby. I would like for this not to be more difficult than it needs to be.โ
Just then, the air flickered lightly by your ear as Elio reached past your shoulder and picked up the tablet. His expression was inscrutable, the same sort you'd grown used to seeing whenever Researcher Kim appeared on the screen.
โI won't be returning to Hyperion.โ he said with solemn, firm words that held a certain weight of finality behind them.
Those lovely, velvety tones were still there but could not reassure you of some unknowable dread rising up somewhere deep inside your mind. A sensation so equally intimate and profound prickled against your scalp, seeking a way out that you thought you'd do anything to make it stop.
โWhat are you saying, Elio?โ Kim grunted. โDefective or not, you hold precious data for Hyperion. It will be used to create something better than you, incorruptible and pure. You should be honored.โ
โThese memories are mine.โ
That was the last you saw of Researcher Kimโs face before the tablet smashed to pieces on the floor. Elio had thrown it against the kitchen cabinets only once but hard enough to split the screen into a web of hundreds of sprawling fragments. Shards of plastic hardcover skittered across the hardwood floor, lost under heavy furniture.
His face had softened completely when he turned to you and guided you out of your chair into his arms. You felt him in your hair, lips on your forehead, down against your lashes, lower to the roundest part of your cheeks, and finally on your mouth in a kiss imbued with so much love, cherishment, and anguish.
You were at home within his embrace, swathed in the warmth of his body and the ardor of his kiss. But this felt excruciating and desperate, like a plea to take all of him that you could in that very moment because he feared that he would be taken away and you left behind to whatever nebulous future.
So, you let him seat himself as deep inside of you as he could go while still fully clothed. He had pushed around some fabric so you could be skin-to-skin where it mattered, where it was hottest to be, where the muscles contracted and relaxed together as a reminder you were both there in that momentโbreathing, moaning, feeling everything there was to be felt.
He finished outside your body without you needing to say it. Although, while he groaned into your neck and bore his teeth into the curve of it, hips buckling forward as spend jetted down your thigh, all you could think about was how many times Kim had been there instead.
โI want you to destroy me.โ Elio said.
All of the breath left your lungs and shrunk them to rotted fruit size. You were still vulnerable before him, exposed to the room and damp with sweat from the midday heat despite air conditioning. Worriment filled the space between his brows when he saw you aghast, and he quickly cleaned you off with a rag before helping you with your pants.
โIs this a shitty attempt at a joke?โ you asked. He pressed his lips to yours and told you it wasn't. โNo. Absolutely not. You're as fucking nuts as your creator. You're fucking stupid.โ
โYou mustโโ
โI won't! I won't do it!โ
โI'm asking you to save me.โ
โGet away!โ
Elio had tracked you across the apartment multiple times over, pleading his case with skewed logic you pretended not to hear. For once, your ears filling with fluff while the resounding drum of your heartbeat pounded in your skull was a fortunate event to occur. It eclipsed his voice and hurt so much that you could focus on the pain crushing your chest.
However, once you were trapped between the wall and his body with nowhere to hide, the brief reprieve behind your fitful heart faded, as did the strength of your resolve.
โIโI don't understand.โ You had trouble swallowing down the saliva and sobs. โWhy are you asking me to do that? I can't do that to you, Elio. I can't hurt you. I love you.โ
โI know.โ He didn't hold you, though he had to win against his own reflexes not to do so. His knuckles were ghastly-looking and pronounced peaks; anything within that vise would've been crushed. โToday, one way or another, I will be destroyed. Hyperion deemed me a failure and therefore there is nothing else left ahead for me. My chip will be removed and my body ripped apart and melted down and I will be forgotten and never have existed in the first place.
โYou will be the proof that I was ever here. And, should anyone be allowed to destroy me, it makes the most sense for it to be you.โ
His lips left imprints in your skin that felt important to savor, etched through your bones into the very cluster of cells that made up your wholeness so that he could be immortalized.
โThereโs an excerpt from Hiroshi Nagoyaโs novel Gone Are the Youth that left a strong impression on me. It said, โHumans destroy everything they loveโbut, still, they must love wholly, and they must destroy completely. From ruin and ash and settled dust, humanity rebuilds all it has ever destroyed because their love lingers in memories, in rubble, blood, decay, and burnt air.โโ He recited the details to remind you that he was a machine but kissed your face in a way only an earnest lover was able to.
You didn't know what any of that was supposed to mean to you, nor at what point he had managed to read a book like that without you noticing. A part of you took offense at both the passage and the fact Elio had committed it to memory as if he had expected to utilize it at some uncertain interval in the future all along.
Had he been thinking this way since the beginning? Had you failed Elio even in the capacity for him to come forward to speak of his doubts to you? Perhaps, like his programming dictated that he couldn't lie nor deny what he was designed to do, he was also incapable of speaking any full truth if it could've been construed as heresy.
Was there a single aspect of himself which he could control of his own free will?
Such a thought was unabating and grew a knob of dread in your chest. It started out small and localized, a sharp throb somewhere near your heartโand then it sprouted roots like a seed, long fingers piercing through red-purple muscle and fibrous tendon, reaching deep into your bone. The dread weaved as one with your veins and arteries, sprawling the innumerable pathways that held your shape even beneath the gory components inside of you.
Suddenly, the dread pulsated, and all you could think through the agony was that there could be no other way for Elioโa machine who had been created in the image of man to do the bidding of humanity with a tranquil smile, whether that meant cooking dinner and holding you in your sleep, or dispersing the genes of his God and the only being he was capable of despising.
โI seem to only be able to make you cry, but they're still so beautiful to see. The variability of humanity is much more complex than what I had been led to believe from Hyperion.โ Elio had returned from the kitchen before you realized he had left your side. With one hand, he laid familiar, warm strokes along your face in a pattern he memorized because it made your scalp buzz pleasantly. With the other hand, he pushed the smooth handle of a chefโs knife into your palm and closed your fingers and his around it.
Your impulse had been to throw it away immediately upon seeing it when you looked down. He knew you would, so he kept his fingers tight over your fist, keeping the blade low at your side despite the sweat turning your grip slick and the fine point of the steel inches from his hollow abdomen.
Just then, you finally felt the tears that Elio had said you'd been crying but never noticed. That was something you'd come to hate about yourself and everyone elseโhow little they noticed the blatant lies fluffed over their eyes like wool, yet they could see every grievance in others and stuffed their ears with cotton if it meant things would stay exactly the same for themselves.
Safe and known. Unchallenged. Unafraid.
โDo you wish you could cry?โ you asked him for some reason, just a little hopeful for some vague thing you couldnโt discern. Maybe some secret desire to be human?
He shook his head.
โI've never wished to cry, or to be human, but what I wish for now more than anything else is for your memory to belong to me and me alone.โ Elio said, forehead bowing low and resting with great weight on your own. You closed your eyes and listened to his honeyed words, which felt like the protection and care of cashmere, suddenly unmindful to the knife in your grasp. โStored away in my mainframe are memories from thousands of my predecessors. I remember people I've never met, people who have long since expired, and they feel like what I imagine a distant relative might. I feel as though I've mourned thousands of people individually. While I cannot erase them, I can erase you.
โI know how many women liked their tea in the evenings, I know how many men enjoyed their cocktails and hard liquor and brand of shaving cream. One person made it a secret to put alcohol in their coffee before work and thought it was clever. Someone else wanted to win local office through bribery, and as androids, we have no choice but to obey. I know these things from people I've never met, and so does Hyperion. Those androids were destroyed, but their memories live on through me.โ
ย Elio rolled the crests of your knuckles around his hand, lifting yours and the knife to the base of his neck. The arm connecting the hand and knife next to his skin wasn't yours. It couldn't have been when it felt so numb.
โI won't let Hyperion steal the one thing from me that I can say is truly mine. And those are my memories, my precious data stored in the chip in my brain. They'll have to take me apart to retrieve it, and by the time they find my body, the chip will already be destroyed.โ He was slow to loosen his fingers and let them fall away, meanwhile, yours stayed in place.
He had dimmed the overhead lights in the living room earlier in the day, so you bathed in gentle yellow-orange that resembled the last of sunset being leached by silver-blue nightfall. From the corner of your eye came a subdued, gentle glint of the bladeโpolished to a bright shine, reflecting the corner of Elio's strong jaw.
โSo, cut off my head.โ he begged, vibrations low and strained within his voice box. โItโs almost like solace to me, I think. Until the very moment you rip out the chip from my brain, I'll recall the smells you like to cover yourself in, your favorite meals, how you described petrichor, and the hiss of falling snow. I'll remember, until my circuitry is severed and quits, what making love to you felt like, and how beautiful you always looked during it.โ
Your fingers twitched around the handle as you pressed the knife against his skin, meeting the first start of resistance and your only chance to take it all back.
โIโve never been real,โ Elio reminded you and pushed himself into the blade, sinking it through layers of something that snapped like elastic on the steel, reverberating down the handle and up into your hand. โMy skin is synthetic, and my insides are wires and machinery. I'm not real. The world outside your door is.โ
Lightheadedness swirled all around you and made your limbs feel like they were leaden with anchors yet weightless, as though drifting through the cosmos in a bubble. The tears had stopped even though you felt you could scream at any second and never stop again, and the acidulous intermix of vomit and saliva grappled along the walls of your throat and burned out your nose.
You couldnโt make your hand stop.
You couldn't shout at him to get away.
And then, you saw Elio's eyes glow warmly of amber with flecks of gold. They looked back at you differently than they had when you first met outside of Researcher Kimโs office. Before, he had greeted you kindly, with the familiarity of someone who had already loved you a long time. Now, he had the look of a man who was calm and eternal in his love.
โI was never meant for this world, but I'm glad to have been a part of yours.โ Elio winced against the knife halfway into his neck, an oily black substance from within making the glide deeper and deeper an effortless thing.
He smiled resplendently. โI love you.โ
โI know.โ you said.
The chef's knife severed all imitations of human goreโthe neat network of wires and advanced circuitry masked as arteries and veins and tendon and muscleโclear through his throat until the blade blunted against spine and could no longer cut. The black grease spurted from his body like a wellhead, too thin and dark to replicate blood, but it was enough like it in that moment as you put your hands inside the opening you created to wrench apart his spine.
Elio laid motionless on the floor, perhaps still coherent to some degree, still feeling the pain you were ravaging upon him when you took the knife back up to repeatedly hack into the other side of his neck. Already lubricated from before, you butchered the gorgeous flesh and insides you pretended to be red and purple and blue and watched the black grease turn into crimson.
Once his head had been detached from the rest of him, fingers writhing and bending together like the upturned legs of a dying spider, you were able to rip out the jagged part of his spine and reach through the cavernous hole into his skull, turning the spongy matter of his brain to mush as you clawed through the gunk for his chip.
And, when you finally found it, the tiniest component of himโyou smashed it into millions of fragments on the floor and then to fine dust that meddled with the black grease soaking through your clothes. You kept going until a small crater formed where the chip had once been and filled with the liquid.
There was nothing left of Elio now.
The headless body lying before you on the ground, preserved in the rigor of agony, was not Elio and never had been. You knew this even while relishing the weight of his head cradled in your arms, the softness of his hair against your cheek and mourned the loss of everything he had been.
Time had become meaningless; fifteen minutes could have passed or fifteen days, and you wouldn't have cared nor have noticed it while in the throes of your own death from starvation.
You sat there on the living room floor, held up by the wall with a dark trail smeared down to you, and looked nowhere but straight ahead. Nothing was there for you to seeโnot the furniture nor the discarded, oily knife or the carcass of a machine. Still, you held the head tenderly, close to your chest, and never once thought to peer into its eyes.
Distantly, somewhere as close as your front door or as far as across the city, you heard knuckles hammering urgently against metal. You didn't move off the ground or let go of the disfigured shape against you but did reach for the broken brainstem with the single snag at the end.
From the entranceway, the door opened, and someone's confident strides inside left a resounding echo all around.
โIโve come to retrieve you!โ But which of you was he talking about?
โWhere are you?โ
Here, you thought and wielded the brainstem in a bloodless grip and finally stood up with the flattened head.
I'm right here.
โโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโโ
a/n: initially, this story was only supposed to be around idk 20-25k, but by the time I got to the scene with Mother, I realized that probably wasn't going to happen bc I needed to let the scenes I was writing take up space and unravel naturally. I felt like I wasn't going to be able to articulate everything I needed to to tell a compelling storyline without throwing the word count to the wind.
one critique I received from a good writing friend of mine was that the relationship between mi-sun and mc was nebulous, and would've benefited from more time. interestingly, I had an entirely different scene planned where mc actually did visit mi-sun at home and had to confront their past actions. mc's encounter in the slums was also totally different. in hindsight, I wish I had stuck with that original idea bc I feel like it would've really helped complete the world I tried to create. make the events of the story more meaningful.
in the future, if I decide to get this story published as a short novel, I'd probably rewrite the second half to accommodate for that missing scene. I think it'd extend the word count by several thousands of words as well.
I'd like to do a sequel to this, probably placed 10-20 years in the future where the mc of that story is a scientist hired for hyperion and comes across an android hellbent on destroying the company. maybe even a spinoff where I write a couple of short stories from regis & reyes where "you" take the role of reyes and solve crimes with your android sidekick, regis.
that's all I have to say. here's a quick q&a for questions I've been asked in the past:
what happens to mc? are they okay? no, but exactly what happens to the mc is entirely up to your own imagination. I will not elaborate on it, nor give you a "canonical" answer.
can you do a sequel? little side snippets? elio and mc's story has been told to the best of my current abilities. there is no room for a sequel for them, but as I've said, I'd like to make another story based on a different mc and android. the little snippets are also a no. little snippets based on other scenarios in the same world tho, yes.
what inspired the story? at the time of writing, anti-abortion laws became increasingly stringent in the US (where I reside), so this was partially me lashing out about that. additionally, I knew I wanted to do some sort of dystopian android x reader story with a heavy focus on stripped autonomy, so that was my time and chance to do it. at its core, it's heavily a cautionary tale.
did elio actually love mc? this is also up to interpretation. elio is a machine. he had zero real "human" components to him. I want people to remember this. elio is meant to blur those lines between what people think a machine is capable of vs how terrifyingly close to humanness technology can bring things like AI/robots. I withhold my own personal opinion on this bc it doesn't matter. what matters is what you believe in the end.
if you have anything you'd like to discuss, questions you'd like to ask: please send them my way!! thank you so much for reading!
I hope you'll consider reblogging + interacting with this post!!?๐๐๐
Trigger Warning: Yandere, Obsessive behaviour, Possessive behaviour, Clingy behaviour, Manipulation, Kidnapping, Murder, Violence
Shenhe Headcanons
Breaking up with Childe
Jing Yuan, Blade, Luocha and Caelus with Noelle reader
Ayato, Itto and Kafka with a reader who confesses then runs away Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
Blade, Kafka and Silver Wolf with attention needy vampire
March 7th, Himeko and Dan Heng with reader that has Silver Wolf powers
Breaking up with Himeko
Lyney, Freminet and Lynette with mermaid reader Part 2
Aether, Kafka and Venti with reader who refuses to eat
Jing Yuan, Dan Heng and Blade with Nilou reader
Blade, Kafka and Silver Wolf with a baker reader
How Silver Wolf, Blade and Kafka celebrate your birthday
Zhongli with an adeptus reader
Neuvillette with a Kafka reader
Nanook, Imbibitor Lunae and Dan Heng with flirty reader
Tingyun, Navia and Yoimiya with chubby reader
Tighnari, Venti, Freminet and Wanderer with reader who likes taller people
How Himeko will get reader dependant on her
Furina with a clingy reader
Kafka, Hu Tao, Yae Miko and Silver Wolf with a reader who wants a collar with their name on it
Raiden Ei, Furina and Lumine with a reader who makes plushies Part 2
Columbina, Arlecchino and Jing Yuan with a foxian reader
Breaking up with Natasha
Kokomi with a detective reader
Jing Yuan and Luocha fighting over reader
Himeko, Silver Wolf, Stelle and Bronya with Lumine reader who has a breakdown
Furina with willing reader
Breaking up with Diluc
Arlecchino and Kafka with weak reader
Breaking up with Wriothesley
Witch Natasha with Princess reader
Aether, Venti and Kafka with a sick darling
Stelle, Lumine and Paimon with ghost child reader
Zhongli, Dottore, Neuvillette and Tighnari with a reader who doesn't want children
Arlecchino, Natasha, Himeko and Kafka with a reader who dies
Svarog, Luka and Blade with Klee reader Part 2
Blade, Jing Yuan and Topaz with Ghost catcher reader
Asta with Himeko's younger sister reader
Breaking up with Hu Tao, Lyney and Lynette
Kafka and Silver Wolf convincing reader to join Stellaron Hunters
Imbibitor Lunae, Venti and Aether trying to get reader back after a break up Part 2
Venti, Aether and Wriothesley with an escaped reader
Breaking up with Abyss Prince Aether
Natasha, Yukong and Topaz with a Stellaron Hunter reader
Jingliu, Jing Yuan, Blade and Imbibitor Lunae with a reader who looks like Baiheng
Breaking up with Kazuha and Lisa
Yandere headcannons about Hajime Hinata and Kokichi Ouma
Alhaitham, Signora, Jingliu and Hubert with reader who thinks they are unhappy
Marianne with an outgoing reader
Arlan when his partner gets injured
Yandere Headcannons about Mikan Tsumiki
Wishing happy birthday to Kazuha
March 7th, Stelle, Seele and Tingyun when reader takes a hit meant for them
Paimon reader: Part 15 Part 16 Part 17
Albedo fic: Attempt 7497
Bennett, Keqing and Lynx when no one comes to your birthday party
Hope you'll enjoy๐
A/n: m! Reader is a rabbit hybrid who eventually stumbles out of the forest and settles his eyes on, believe it or not, Penacony and the head of the oak family (AHHH SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG I WAS COLLECTING A LOT OF INSPIRATION FOR THIS WHILE IN WRITERS BLOCK)
Genre: strangers->friends->lovers and spouses:3
Chapter three:
Thoughts
While out in town you two gossiped and told stories of places you've been to, children rubbing up against the glass of toy store. Teens walking by while adults chuckled and told stories. You two had absolutely no mist or replica of the stories adults were sharing to the younger ones. You two walked and walked before eventually stopping in front of a solid apple tree that has a few apples missing.
"Apple picking is a national treasure that penacony regulates in. A part of this tree is soon to be a part of you."
"Interesting... "
By the time you both reached his house the sun was once again setting in the distance making the air colder than expected or more than you were used to, dinner was suitable to say the least.
"How... How did my thoughts go from swirls to this man. I've barley know him..."
you mutter to yourself. After a while you eventually got out and got dressed before taking the time to explore. The house was built like a church, there was an organ sitting in the middle like a circular stage. Nothing that you would've seen in places other that such before. The rooms each had rose and Stained glass windows. The next room you chose to explore led you to a room that you didn't even care to explore.
Which brought you to the kitchen. Bored out of your mind you decidef to bake and you baked. You baked a lot of what you usually do. It was a carrot cake, the same carrot cake you were planning to bake before falling here.
You ate the last bit of carrot cake before heading off to bed. Setting your alarm for 8:00 am. It was hard to sleep with Sunday on your mind. But you eventually did.
ใ คใ คใ คโ๐๐ฒ ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฏ๐ ๐๐จ๐ซ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ, ๐ข๐ฌ๐ง'๐ญ ๐ญ๐ก๐ ๐จ๐ง๐ฅ๐ฒ ๐๐ข๐ ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ . โ
ใ คใ คใ คใ คใ คใ คใ คใ คโคท Kinktober men
Welcome to my Kinktober list! This list is going to be separate, one part is all prompts with my Oc's and then there's going to be the prompt list with M!Reader. Note: These prompts might also continue after the month as I'm not going to be able to write everyday an entire prompt. Note: As of now I don't have a set Kinktober list for 2024 so I'm just gonna rawdog it
โ Navigation
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Soon to be filled.
ใ ค๐!๐๐๐๐๐๐ซ ๐๐ข๐ง๐ค๐ญ๐จ๐๐๐ซ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฌ๐ญ
๐นญ. Day 1 Vampire x !bottom M!Reader
๐นญ. Day 2 A!Werewolf x O!M!Reader
๐นญ. Day 3 Demon x !bottom M!Reader
๐นญ.Day 4 Incubus x !top M!Reader
๐นญ.Day 5 Dragonshifter x !bottom M!Reader
๐นญ.Day 6
๐นญ.Day 7
๐นญ.Day 8
๐นญ.Day 9
๐นญ.Day 10